- 11 minutes ago
Head Witch in Charge
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:23Jesus! Mom! Can you at least warn me when you're gonna do that? Please?
00:00:28Oh, please. Don't be such a child. Do you still have the Wand of Light?
00:00:43See? The all-powerful magic heirloom. Still safe and sound.
00:00:48Well, you should be more careful. The Wand of Light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires.
00:00:54Yeah. And if it falls into the wrong hands, it would become the most dangerous weapon in the world.
00:01:01But a marriage to another noble witch family would only strengthen your power.
00:01:06Yeah. Unless it's an evil Svensson, right?
00:01:10The Svensons are our worst enemies, Leona.
00:01:14Do you know how much our family has suffered over the centuries because of them?
00:01:18I know. Sorry.
00:01:21You are the guardian of the Wand of Light, Leona.
00:01:25And you can't reach your full potential until you marry and succeed me as head of the family.
00:01:31Come home with a husband next week or I will pick one for you.
00:01:35What?
00:01:36Mom, no. Please don't.
00:01:38Leona Sherwood, you are getting married whether you like the boy I pick or not.
00:01:43Mom, please.
00:01:44Understand?
00:01:47Don't worry, Mom. I'm the responsible daughter. Remember.
00:01:59Okay, Leona Sherwood. This is your last weekend of freedom.
00:02:07For two more nights, fuck my responsibility. I'm gonna have some fun.
00:02:26Thank you. That would be $25.
00:02:30I think you mean it's on the house, right?
00:02:34Right. It's on the house.
00:02:55There you are, little Miss Sherwood.
00:03:03Where the hell are you?
00:03:04I'm in Vegas like I said I would be old man.
00:03:06Hey, don't you get smart with me, you little shit.
00:03:10Remember your mission.
00:03:11Seduce the Sherwood heir and marry her and then that whole obnoxious family will be there to pay off our
00:03:17debts.
00:03:18You mean your debts.
00:03:19Quiet!
00:03:20It's bad enough that I have a sorry excuse for an heir.
00:03:23You are an embarrassment to the Spence in name.
00:03:27Now if you don't marry the Sherwood girl like I told you,
00:03:30I am going to sell your little sister off to Old Fitzgerald to be his fourth wife.
00:03:37Dad's secret is just a kid.
00:03:38When I want your opinion, I will ask for it.
00:03:42Until then, you shut up and do as I say.
00:03:45Do you understand?
00:03:46Yeah.
00:03:48I understand.
00:03:49Good!
00:03:50And you, keep practicing.
00:03:52You sound god-awful.
00:03:55Heartless fucking bastard.
00:04:11It's two of us.
00:04:13You're saying you don't remember me?
00:04:15Who remembers shit we did as dumb teens anyways?
00:04:17No way.
00:04:19Totally.
00:04:19I love that show.
00:04:21I watched it in one sitting at like 2am.
00:04:23This is one of my favorites.
00:04:25It definitely doesn't get the love that it deserves.
00:04:27But I think it's one of the best ones.
00:04:29Really?
00:04:31I never begged you for a sappy romance kind of guy.
00:04:35Looks can be deceiving.
00:04:41The wand of light.
00:04:43So it does exist.
00:04:45Maybe I'm just jaded.
00:04:47It's hard to believe that love like that actually exists in real life.
00:04:51Why not?
00:04:52We're witches.
00:04:53Monsters and magic exist in our world.
00:04:56Why can't true love?
00:04:58I'm Lili, by the way.
00:05:01Lili Collins.
00:05:05Eric Phillips.
00:05:07Nice to meet you, Lili Collins.
00:05:09Damn, he's hot.
00:05:11And I'm in Vegas.
00:05:12I deserve a little fun.
00:05:14Well, Eric Phillips.
00:05:16I'll be in the poker room tonight.
00:05:18Maybe I'll see you there.
00:05:20Maybe.
00:05:39Okay, Svenson.
00:05:41Don't fuck this up.
00:05:55Eric motherfucking Svenson.
00:05:58Excuse me?
00:05:59You ghosted me for three months after sleeping with me?
00:06:01And you think you can sit there and act like nothing happened?
00:06:04I think you've got me confused with someone else.
00:06:06Don't gaslight me, Svenson.
00:06:08I know exactly who you are.
00:06:24You know who she is?
00:06:26I think she's got me confused with someone else.
00:06:40You nervous?
00:06:41Not at all.
00:06:44You can always fold, you know.
00:06:46I'd hate to send you home empty-handed.
00:06:50Not a chance.
00:06:52I'm here to win.
00:06:54You sure?
00:06:55Seems like your focus is somewhere else.
00:06:58Oh.
00:06:59I am very focused.
00:07:04Are you guys done making Google eyes at each other or what?
00:07:09You're full of shit, Phillips.
00:07:10I call.
00:07:12Yeah, there is no way that you have this.
00:07:15But don't worry.
00:07:17I'll let you go another round.
00:07:19Once I beat you.
00:07:20Actually, I think I'm about to hit the jackpot.
00:07:26Eric?
00:07:46I've wanted to do that since I saw you by the pool in your bikini.
00:07:50Eric.
00:07:51Everyone can see.
00:07:53Do you want me to stop?
00:07:58Him.
00:08:10Let him watch.
00:08:12Give him a shower.
00:08:25Please don't stop use your words tell me what you want. I want your tongue inside me, please. That's a
00:08:35good girl
00:08:45Wait, wait, I think I'm gonna... Was that some kind of vision? No, that was from him
00:09:05Lucky son of a bitch. Beginner Lux, let's see you do it again next hand. No can do. I have
00:09:13a date
00:09:13With a very pretty lady
00:09:21Why do I have the feeling that you're not exactly as you present, Eric Phillips?
00:09:27It is Vegas. Isn't that part of the fun?
00:09:43No, it wasn't very nice of you to tease me with your strap of your dress during our game. It's
00:09:50very distracting
00:09:53Well, you know, it wasn't very nice of you to send me that little vision during our game
00:09:58I just wanted to give you a little sneak preview
00:10:05Eric, there are people
00:10:11And if you're quiet, they won't see you
00:10:17I should stop
00:10:18This wasn't how the plan was supposed to go
00:10:20You know, you were right before
00:10:22I'm not who I say I am
00:10:24And who out there is exactly as they present
00:10:28But I am...
00:10:29Look, I don't care who you are outside of this
00:10:32For once
00:10:33For once in my life
00:10:34I...
00:10:35I just want to forget about everything
00:10:38Just live in the moment
00:10:40And I think you
00:10:43Can help me do that
00:10:51Remove the camouflage
00:10:53I want you to see you
00:10:56The real you
00:10:58But then you'll know who I am
00:11:01I already know who you are
00:11:02The real you
00:11:05Wants to let go
00:11:11No one's ever looked at me like that
00:11:14He really wants me
00:11:15The real me
00:11:17Fuck
00:11:19You are gorgeous
00:11:23I want you, Eric
00:11:27I need you
00:11:31Spread your legs for me
00:11:36Keep your eyes open
00:11:39I want you to watch yourself come
00:11:43All over my fingers
00:11:48Keep your eyes open
00:11:55I thought you said that they couldn't hear me
00:11:57They can't if you stay quiet
00:12:00Keep your eyes open
00:12:01Or I'll stop
00:12:06That's a good girl
00:12:08Look down at my hand
00:12:14Oh my god, they hurt me
00:12:16They can't
00:12:18Just relax
00:12:20I can't
00:12:22I can't, Eric
00:12:23It's okay
00:12:25Don't think
00:12:27Just fail
00:12:28Tell me how you feel
00:12:30So good
00:12:32But I need
00:12:33More, Eric
00:12:37You feel so good
00:12:39You feel so good
00:12:39I can't wait to put my mouth on you
00:12:44So I'm going to make you come
00:12:46I'll get you there
00:12:49I'm going to go down
00:12:50And I want you to scream my name when you come
00:12:53Five
00:12:55Four
00:12:55Four
00:12:59Two
00:13:02Four
00:13:03Four
00:13:04Three
00:13:05Four
00:13:06Four
00:13:06Four
00:13:08Five
00:13:21Four
00:13:23I can't believe I just came on his hand in front of other people.
00:13:28I think this is your floor.
00:13:36I'll be at the fountain tomorrow at 8 o'clock.
00:13:40If you decide that you want one.
00:13:42See you there.
00:13:53How did he know what floor I was on?
00:14:00So you've told me all about your wild sister and the things that she's done.
00:14:05What about you?
00:14:07Me?
00:14:09I'm the responsible sister.
00:14:12The boring one, if you will.
00:14:15And I do what I'm supposed to do.
00:14:17All the rules and all that good stuff.
00:14:20I don't believe you.
00:14:21I do. I mean, I know how you are at an elevator.
00:14:24Oh, come on.
00:14:27Come on.
00:14:28It's Vegas.
00:14:30Let me be your bad influence.
00:14:32Just for divine.
00:14:36So, any bad ideas?
00:14:42Just one.
00:14:49What are you doing?
00:15:06No games.
00:15:08Just fuck me already.
00:15:09I thought I would try to woo you first.
00:15:11Consider me wooed.
00:15:12Then we could take it slow?
00:15:13Oh, your lips say one thing.
00:15:16But your body says something else.
00:15:29Wait.
00:15:31Shit.
00:15:33I almost lost my cool.
00:15:35I gotta remember the plan.
00:15:38Oh, my God.
00:15:40I can't believe I just did that.
00:15:41That was so embarrassing.
00:15:42This is why I don't do crazy shit.
00:15:44That was way too much.
00:15:46Hey.
00:15:47You're never too much.
00:15:48You don't understand, Eric.
00:15:50Okay, if my family saw me do any of that, they would freak out.
00:15:54Tonight's not about your family.
00:15:55Tonight's about you.
00:15:57Remember?
00:15:57Forget what everyone else has told you to do.
00:16:00Do something that you want to do.
00:16:02Something no one would expect.
00:16:04Maybe he's right.
00:16:06I've spent my whole life doing what my family's told me to do.
00:16:12For once in my life, I'm doing something for myself.
00:16:16She spotted the chapel.
00:16:19Just like I planned.
00:16:23So, are you, uh, you sure about this marriage thing?
00:16:26It's only temporary.
00:16:28Okay, and old magic is weak.
00:16:30The hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning.
00:16:34So, are you ready for a holy matrimony?
00:16:37I'm ready if you're ready.
00:16:40Come on.
00:16:43Let's go.
00:16:49You nervous?
00:16:52Just, never been married before.
00:17:01Uh, it's my sister.
00:17:02I need to take this.
00:17:03Oh, yeah.
00:17:04Take your time.
00:17:05Elvis here wants me to pick out a hand fast bouquet.
00:17:07Hey, mama.
00:17:08Let's get some flowers for you.
00:17:09Come on.
00:17:09Let's do it.
00:17:11You need to come home.
00:17:12Now.
00:17:13I can't.
00:17:14Secret.
00:17:15Eric, Dad's up to something.
00:17:16He invited Fitzgerald to the house and made me dress up.
00:17:19He looks at me weird.
00:17:21It really freaks me out.
00:17:23You were my big brother, E.
00:17:24I need you here.
00:17:26Listen, I can't leave right now.
00:17:27But I promise, when I come home, I'll have enough power to get rid of Dad forever.
00:17:31Okay?
00:17:35Hey.
00:17:37Is everything okay?
00:17:39Yeah.
00:17:42Yeah, it's fine.
00:17:44You, uh, you sure about this?
00:17:48It's only temporary.
00:17:50Come on, we'll be laughing about this for years.
00:17:56Let's go.
00:17:59Let's go.
00:18:11Right.
00:18:12Only temporary.
00:18:14Unless you get hand fasted under a full moon, then the hand fast bond is nearly unbreakable.
00:18:20But she doesn't know that.
00:18:21And once she does, she'll hate me.
00:18:25Is your sister okay?
00:18:27Is something wrong?
00:18:30Nothing's wrong.
00:18:31We're about to get married in Vegas by Ovis.
00:18:34What could possibly be wrong?
00:18:37All right, you ready to rock and roll, you hunk-a-hunk-a-hot couple?
00:18:41Let's get this show started.
00:18:43Woo!
00:19:10This is it.
00:19:12I have the Wand of Light, the most powerful object in the world.
00:19:16If I leave now, I could use it to take control away from my father, set Sigrid and I free.
00:19:29But I already betrayed her once.
00:19:59I'll be right back.
00:20:13I'll have to get more chocolate strawberries.
00:20:15Be back soon.
00:20:25It's only temporary.
00:20:27Okay, and old magic is weak.
00:20:29The hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning.
00:20:32Hmm, that's weird.
00:20:34The mark should have worn off by now.
00:20:44So, did you marry the girl yet?
00:20:50No, it's complicated.
00:20:54Complicated?
00:20:55Or distracted?
00:20:56You were sent there to marry the Sherwood heir and bind her power to this family, not to play house.
00:21:03You're a Svensson.
00:21:05Act like one.
00:21:06Eric is a Svensson?
00:21:09I married my family's worst enemy?
00:21:11I don't need you to tell me what I am.
00:21:14Then stop hesitating.
00:21:16If the rumors about the wand of light are true, we might catch an even bigger prize.
00:21:21So hurry up and marry the Sherwood girl and then bring her to me, idiot.
00:21:35He's been lying this whole time.
00:21:42I need to tell her the truth.
00:21:46You lying piece of troll shit!
00:21:49You didn't want me.
00:21:50You just wanted the fucking wand, didn't you?
00:21:54I didn't even know the wand existed until I met you.
00:21:56You still lied to me, Eric.
00:21:58You knew I was a Sherwood from the start.
00:22:00That's why you gave me a fake fucking name, right?
00:22:02Okay, I did, but that was before we...
00:22:04You lied before, before you decided to mess with me?
00:22:06Get your dick wet before you ruin me and my family forever?
00:22:10I'm not trying to ruin your family.
00:22:11I'm trying to save mine.
00:22:12Oh, I know all about you, Svensons.
00:22:15All you do is lie and cheat and steal to get whatever you fucking want.
00:22:20I should have caught it at the poker table, but your little tricks won't work on me this time.
00:22:25The hand fast mark, it'll fade.
00:22:28Just like you, just like whatever this was.
00:22:31The hand fast wasn't a trick.
00:22:32Not that part.
00:22:34Not with you.
00:22:35It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:22:38You will never, ever get the wand!
00:22:42Lily, wait.
00:22:44When this fades, Eric, I will never have to see you again!
00:23:01So, that didn't happen.
00:23:05My older sister Effie told me that the mark would fade a week later.
00:23:09Then a month went by.
00:23:13Then, well...
00:23:17See, this is where you don't fuck with old magic.
00:23:20It's all fun and games, so there's a full moon.
00:23:22It's all fun and games, so there's a full moon.
00:23:23Then, it's the most powerful magic in the universe.
00:23:30Apparently, getting a hand fast married under a full moon creates a bond that's almost unbreakable.
00:23:36Also, apparently, the almost part means that both people have to perform the divorce spell.
00:23:44I tried calling, texting, sending flying monkeys, nothing, not a single word from my beloved husband for half a year.
00:24:05Yes, I still sleep with a wand under my pillow.
00:24:08The emotional ass whooping I got from my mother for getting hand fasted to a stranger was bad enough.
00:24:13No one can ever find out that I almost lost the wand, too.
00:24:19I just need one night to sleep without thinking about him.
00:24:46Who are you?
00:24:48What do you want with the wand of light?
00:24:51Nothing.
00:24:51I'm just here to collect my payday from my client once I bring him that wand.
00:24:57Payday?
00:24:58Someone sent you!
00:24:59Who?
00:25:00I'm afraid I can't break client confidentiality.
00:25:03Sorry, sweetie.
00:25:05Well, I'm afraid that you chose the wrong witch to fuck with tonight.
00:25:21Be wise not to fight back, witch.
00:25:24You're in over your head.
00:25:26I'd rather die than let you take the wand!
00:25:31Suit yourself.
00:25:36Suit yourself.
00:25:45What the fuck?
00:25:57What the fuck?
00:26:00Get off me!
00:26:01She has the wand!
00:26:03I got the wand.
00:26:04I'll get the rest later.
00:26:08No!
00:26:12You are the reason I lost the wand.
00:26:15Who are you?
00:26:21The hand fast mark.
00:26:26Hello, wife.
00:26:27Miss me?
00:26:31What are you doing here?
00:26:33Oh, well, you know, I thought I'd spice up our marriage, do a little role-playing, but
00:26:37it looks like you were more into bondage.
00:26:39I didn't know you were so kinky.
00:26:40Shut up!
00:26:44Look, you should be thanking me.
00:26:46I did just save your life.
00:26:47Thanking you?
00:26:48You're the reason my family's most powerful heirloom is gone.
00:26:51How did you even find me?
00:26:54Wait a minute.
00:26:56You were trying to steal the wand, too, weren't you?
00:26:59Maybe.
00:27:01God, you slimy, tote-faced motherfucker!
00:27:05Okay, first, you tricked me into marrying you, then you ghost me for six months, and now
00:27:10you come in here like a goddamn fucking cartoon burglar and try to take my wand!
00:27:15Look, I was just gonna borrow it!
00:27:17Yeah, for one of your dirty, no-good-spentance schemes!
00:27:20I-I just-I need it, okay?
00:27:23It's-it's the only way that we can be free.
00:27:26No!
00:27:27Look, my dad doesn't know about our marriage.
00:27:30Not yet.
00:27:31But he knows about the wand.
00:27:32If he gets a hold of it, he's gonna sell it to the highest bidder.
00:27:35Whoever controls the wand has the power to take over the world.
00:27:38Or worse.
00:27:39No!
00:27:40Worse than tricking me into marrying you?
00:27:42I told you that that wasn't a trick.
00:27:44It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:27:46She has the wand, that shadow thief or whatever.
00:27:50And that's your fault!
00:27:51I can get it back.
00:27:54Look, I know I don't deserve it.
00:27:55But just give me one more chance.
00:27:58I can get the wand back, take care of what I need to take care of, and then I'll do
00:28:02the
00:28:02divorce spell.
00:28:03Please, Lily, just give me one more chance.
00:28:06Please.
00:28:07I can't trust him.
00:28:09I shouldn't.
00:28:11But my gut tells me, this time, it might be different.
00:28:20No.
00:28:22No, we're both gonna go get it.
00:28:25It is my job as a Sherwood heir to set things right, so I don't let the wand fall into
00:28:30the
00:28:31wrong hands.
00:28:31And you really think after Vegas, I would let you go alone to find the most powerful,
00:28:36magical object in the entire world?
00:28:39Fair.
00:28:40Whatever you want, Lily.
00:28:43God, I hate when you call me that.
00:28:45All right, I'll call you wife.
00:28:48And you can call me whatever you want.
00:28:50Eric, husband, daddy.
00:28:53Shut up!
00:28:54Don't call me wife either.
00:28:56After we get this wand, we will do the divorce spell.
00:28:58Got it?
00:28:58You're breaking my heart.
00:29:00I mean, you're the better half of my soul.
00:29:03Yeah.
00:29:04You're not gonna speak talk your way into my pants again, Eric.
00:29:07We'll see.
00:29:12Now, the wand forbids a direct tracking spell, so we have to track its trail.
00:29:18That's a ten-mile radius.
00:29:19We'll never find the wand inside that circle.
00:29:22Well, with the tracking spell, I get a location, okay?
00:29:25It doesn't last long, though.
00:29:27We'll have like three or four days.
00:29:28Well, lucky for you, I already packed your bags.
00:29:33Consider it our official honeymoon.
00:29:39Aja, this, we're done.
00:29:40You got it?
00:29:41Don't go back on your words, Benson.
00:29:43We will do the divorce spell.
00:29:45Cross my heart.
00:29:47Hope to die.
00:30:04You imagicked a car here?
00:30:07This isn't just any car.
00:30:15This is Bessie.
00:30:16You really expect us to track down the most powerful, magical object in the world?
00:30:22In a car without a roof?
00:30:24I mean, if you're not comfortable, I could go by myself.
00:30:32If you trust me not to run away.
00:30:36I wouldn't trust you with a half-eaten newt muffin.
00:30:39I was going to throw in the trash.
00:30:42Then your chariot awaits, wife.
00:31:04We've been driving all day, and she hasn't said a single word.
00:31:19You're a Svensson.
00:31:21You don't play house with sheriffs.
00:31:23Wait, why are we turning?
00:31:24We don't have any time.
00:31:25We have to find the wand, Eric.
00:31:28That circle is getting further and further away.
00:31:31Plus, it's getting dark.
00:31:32We need to stay somewhere for the night.
00:31:33Why don't you just let me drive?
00:31:35Because you haven't slept either.
00:31:36Plus, no one can drive Bessie from me.
00:31:40What is with guys and cars?
00:31:42Jesus.
00:31:42No.
00:31:43I mean, literally, no one else can drive Bessie.
00:31:46My great-great-grandfather put a hex on all of our possessions.
00:31:49Anyone that's non-blood-related can't touch it.
00:31:52The Svensons like to hoard their treasures.
00:31:55Your family has issues.
00:31:57Finally.
00:31:58Something we can agree on.
00:32:00Was this your plan all along?
00:32:02Make me feel bad for you because your family's evil,
00:32:04so I get all ooey-gooey and forget about the divorce?
00:32:07Not everyone in my family is evil.
00:32:10Yeah.
00:32:11Okay.
00:32:24You cross this wall or do anything to piss me off more than you already have,
00:32:29then you do not even want to imagine the hex I'm going to put on you.
00:32:37I promise, no funny business.
00:32:41Peaky promise.
00:33:01Good night to you two.
00:33:17In Vegas, you said you had a sister, right?
00:33:26She didn't ask to be a Svensson.
00:33:29She's different than us.
00:33:32Better.
00:33:33Not like you?
00:33:35No.
00:33:37Not like me.
00:33:39But you already know that.
00:33:40Not like me.
00:36:17And go for me.
00:36:25Are you ready?
00:36:30Eric?
00:36:34Eric?
00:36:45You said that you wouldn't look.
00:36:49I don't need to look to know what you were doing.
00:36:52Well, I'll think about me.
00:36:54God, you are so full of yourself.
00:36:57Do I know what I heard?
00:36:58Say another word and I'll turn you into a frog.
00:37:04Are you thinking about that time in Vegas where I ate you out in the shower?
00:37:11And you came so hard you almost crushed my skull between your thighs.
00:37:16I think about it.
00:37:17I think about those times a lot.
00:37:19Yeah, well, I don't think about them at all.
00:37:46You still haven't even told me what you want the wand for yet.
00:37:49I don't think about it.
00:37:50It's on a need-to-know basis.
00:37:51It's on a need-to-know basis.
00:37:51Oh, don't you think I need to know?
00:37:55I am your wife after all.
00:37:57Oh, now you remember you're my wife.
00:37:59Funny how you only remember that when it's convenient for you.
00:38:02I remember every time I think about how badly I fucked up in Vegas.
00:38:05So all I am is a mistake.
00:38:07If I remember right, you're the one that suggested that we get handfast married.
00:38:11Obviously, that was before I knew about all your bullshit and lies.
00:38:16Duty and responsibility might not be a big deal in your family, but in mine, it's huge.
00:38:21See? There you go again.
00:38:23Always worried about what your family wants.
00:38:24It's never about what you want.
00:38:26I follow the rules because I have to, Eric.
00:38:29If I don't, I end up in situations like this.
00:38:32Did you ever stop to think that maybe that's unfair?
00:38:35That maybe your ideas and their ideas are bullshit?
00:38:39You ever think of that?
00:38:41Spoken like a true Spinson.
00:38:43Well, you're a Spinson too, sweetheart.
00:38:45Not much longer, I can tell you that.
00:39:06I want to get some coffee.
00:39:07It's being dark.
00:39:08You really think you should be alone?
00:39:10So now that we're married, you think you have to babysit me too?
00:39:17Fine.
00:39:17Just don't take too long.
00:39:22You got her in the car or what?
00:39:24Who?
00:39:25Don't play dumb with me, boy.
00:39:27The little Sherwood witch you married forgot to tell me about.
00:39:32You thought I wouldn't find out, huh?
00:39:34You did a good job of hiding it, I'll give you that.
00:39:37Maybe you are my son after all, huh?
00:39:40What's the end game here?
00:39:42You said you just needed to get the Sherwood's wand so you could pay off your debts.
00:39:45What does she have to do with it?
00:39:46Because I'm not an idiot like you.
00:39:48I'll finally have all the leverage I need over the Sherwood family.
00:39:53When I tell them their pretty little heir is my new daughter-in-law.
00:39:57And then it'll be our family that gets to call the shots in the magic world.
00:40:02So you just want to use her?
00:40:04Like you use mom?
00:40:05Like you're using your own daughter.
00:40:07This is not a request, boy.
00:40:09Bring the girl and the wand to me or you will be stripped of your name.
00:40:14Your magic, everything.
00:40:15And your sister, she'll be the one paying the price for your mistakes!
00:40:30This isn't right. The trail should still be here.
00:40:34Would you like some coffee, Miss Sherwood?
00:40:36Yeah, thank you.
00:40:38Wait, how did you know my...
00:40:41You...
00:40:44But the map said that...
00:40:46That's cute.
00:40:47You think that dusty old map could track me?
00:40:55That wand is mine.
00:41:00Not anymore, it's not.
00:41:01And sadly, my employers need your powers too.
00:41:05Employer?
00:41:07Hold still. This will only hurt a bit.
00:41:10No, stop! Stop!
00:41:19Get away from her!
00:41:25Eric, the wand!
00:41:39My magic...
00:41:40She took half of my magic, Eric!
00:41:43You're okay. I got you.
00:41:45You're okay.
00:41:46You're okay.
00:41:48You're okay.
00:41:49Just breathe.
00:41:50The map said that the wand was miles away.
00:41:53What did she want with my powers?
00:41:55Thief must have found some way to bypass the tracking spell.
00:41:58She can have gone far.
00:41:59We'll find her.
00:42:00Lay load for now.
00:42:01Eric, stop the car!
00:42:02I can't breathe!
00:42:04Okay.
00:42:15Look at me.
00:42:16Look at me. Look at me.
00:42:17You're okay.
00:42:17You're okay.
00:42:18Just breathe.
00:42:19I got you.
00:42:20You're safe.
00:42:22I thought she was gonna kill me, Eric.
00:42:25I'm not gonna let that happen.
00:42:28I'm not gonna let that happen.
00:42:28Not while I'm breathing.
00:42:41I still hate you.
00:42:45If you hated me, you wouldn't let me touch you like this.
00:42:50This doesn't change anything.
00:42:52It's only scratching an itch.
00:42:55Once we get the wand, and we do the divorce spell,
00:42:59now we forget each other existed.
00:43:05Is that what you want, Lili?
00:43:08You wanna forget how good I make you feel?
00:43:10You wanna forget.
00:43:12I'm the only person in the whole fucking world
00:43:14who can make you feel this way.
00:43:20Eric.
00:43:23Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:43:31We can't do this.
00:43:34This is what goes wrong between us.
00:43:36We can't make that mistake again.
00:43:38We have a job to do, Eric.
00:43:40Let's get the wand.
00:43:42That's it.
00:43:43And then what?
00:43:45You know what happens after, Eric.
00:43:47We do the divorce spell.
00:43:49And we never see each other again.
00:43:52Yeah.
00:44:06It's fine.
00:44:07Bye, Eric.
00:44:10I am the first.
00:44:10Let's get to some of this!
00:44:11I am.
00:44:11I am.
00:44:14I am.
00:44:15You have to.
00:44:16You have to.
00:44:17You have to.
00:44:20I am.
00:44:20I am.
00:44:20I am.
00:44:21You have to.
00:44:22Smells like fresh baked pastries, cinnamon, old magic.
00:44:32I should have known.
00:44:34It's a Satyr's Inn.
00:44:36That's spelled.
00:44:38A nomenin habitus smell.
00:44:41It's woven into places like this for couples.
00:44:46You mean Orchise?
00:44:48Satyrs are the horniest bastards in this own world.
00:44:52It lowers any fear, doubt, shame, grancy your deepest desires.
00:44:59Without any fear of judgment or consequences.
00:45:11You don't.
00:45:14I'm trying not to.
00:45:33The spell doesn't create desire.
00:45:37It lets go of the lies.
00:45:39It tells us what we really want.
00:45:42What I want doesn't matter.
00:45:44It matters in here.
00:45:46I don't.
00:45:46I don't.
00:45:47Tell me what you really want.
00:45:49You can say goodbye.
00:45:52And go our separate ways.
00:45:54Or you can tell me you want this.
00:45:57You want me.
00:46:00Tell me to stay.
00:46:04Stay here.
00:46:06Please.
00:46:07God, what is this?
00:46:09Is this just the magic?
00:46:11No.
00:46:14It's not the spell.
00:46:16It's freedom.
00:46:18In here the outside world doesn't matter.
00:46:22Just you.
00:46:23And me.
00:46:25I shouldn't want this.
00:46:28I know.
00:46:30I shouldn't be doing this.
00:46:35Or this.
00:46:43I want you.
00:46:58I need you.
00:47:02Tell me who you are.
00:47:04Lili.
00:47:07Close.
00:47:11But not quite.
00:47:13Tonight.
00:47:15Tell me who you are.
00:47:18Your wife.
00:47:42This doesn't change anything.
00:47:44I know.
00:47:45Okay.
00:47:46We can have tonight.
00:47:47And then tomorrow we go back to who we are on the outside.
00:47:51Sure.
00:47:52I'll go back to being my bad self and you can go back to pretending to be a good little
00:47:56witch.
00:47:58Excuse me.
00:47:59Don't deny Lili share what Sven said.
00:48:02I know what kind of dork naughty thoughts you am.
00:48:07I don't.
00:48:09It's okay to be bad.
00:48:12You don't have to pretend.
00:48:16I don't, huh?
00:48:20You know just because I have half my magic doesn't mean I can't play with you for tonight.
00:48:25I don't, huh.
00:48:28I don't think I can't play with you for tonight.
00:48:37I don't think I can't play with you for tonight.
00:48:39I don't think I can't play with you, but I don't think I can't play with you.
00:48:53I've never won't lie.
00:48:55To you.
00:49:00I don't remember packing that lingerie.
00:49:02Close your eyes.
00:49:06Eric, you're so good for being such a bad boy.
00:49:11I am being properly motivated not to move.
00:49:19See how long it takes you to break.
00:49:21For you, I could stay here forever.
00:49:23Pretty to think so.
00:49:25Why don't we test that little theory, huh?
00:49:29We're playing a dangerous game.
00:49:32All you have to do is admit that I win.
00:49:37I'll let you fuck me.
00:49:39I'll even let you come wherever you want.
00:49:47You can come here.
00:49:50Or here.
00:49:53I'll even let you come in here.
00:49:58God.
00:49:59Come on.
00:50:01I know you wanna.
00:50:03Just admit I'm right.
00:50:07Fine.
00:50:09You win.
00:50:10Oh, what was that?
00:50:12You hurt me.
00:50:22So, what's my prize?
00:50:27I could torture you like you did me.
00:50:32But I wanna be inside you.
00:50:35I wanna feel you squeeze me tight.
00:50:38And take me to bed, husband.
00:50:44Call me that again.
00:50:47You want me to fuck you, husband?
00:50:50Yeah.
00:50:51Fuck me.
00:51:00Tell me a story.
00:51:03Like the ones you did in Vegas.
00:51:06I've got a story about my pet goat, Gilmore,
00:51:10and how he got stuck on a magic carpet.
00:51:13Or the story about how my sister tried to negotiate with a troll using only red images.
00:51:20I know.
00:51:22I already know about your family.
00:51:26I wanna know about you.
00:51:29What's it like to be a Svensson heir?
00:51:32You want the insider info.
00:51:34Mm.
00:51:35Mm.
00:51:35You tell me yours, I'll tell you mine.
00:51:37You're gonna tell me how wonderful it was growing up as a beloved and blessed Sherwood?
00:51:47Is that what you think being a Sherwood is like?
00:51:50Is that what you think being a Sherwood is like?
00:51:53All fun and rainbows?
00:51:55Yeah, everybody loves your family.
00:51:57That's not true, Eric.
00:51:58There are so many people who would love it if we just disappeared.
00:52:02My mother has been shouldering all that responsibility and pressure for decades.
00:52:07And next year, I will be the head witch in charge.
00:52:10Everyone's counting on me to do the right thing.
00:52:13Like eat your fruits and veggies?
00:52:14Like spending my whole childhood being told that the whole world depended on me.
00:52:20Like never bothering to have any hopes or dreams because my whole life was planned for me from the very
00:52:27start before I was even born.
00:52:29I'm always doing the right thing for the family.
00:52:31I was never allowed to even think of doing the wrong thing.
00:52:35I couldn't be tired.
00:52:36I couldn't be scared.
00:52:38I couldn't be angry.
00:52:39Every one mistake and my family loses everything that they've ever worked for.
00:52:43If this whole world fades to black, it's because I messed up.
00:52:47It's because I didn't do a good job.
00:52:52I don't think I've ever said that out loud before.
00:52:55I'm glad you did.
00:52:58Your turn.
00:53:00Growing up with Svensson was a little different.
00:53:04The old man likes to say I was the first of his disappointments.
00:53:10I guess it's good.
00:53:12At least I was first in something.
00:53:14I didn't care about disappointing him.
00:53:17I just wanted to get away from him.
00:53:20I had it all planned out when I turned 16.
00:53:23I'd leave, change my name, and the Svensson bloodline would die with me.
00:53:27My mom died when Secret was born.
00:53:32My dad used to tear against me every day since.
00:53:41I'm so sorry, Eric.
00:53:44I shouldn't have asked.
00:53:48It's okay.
00:53:49Svensson's have always lived in the Sherwood shadows.
00:53:53We are the shadows.
00:53:57All you do is shine.
00:54:08He always asks me what I want.
00:54:12What do you want, Eric?
00:54:17You'd hate me if I told you.
00:54:20I mean, more than you already do.
00:54:24I don't hate you.
00:54:27I never did.
00:55:03Eric, something's wrong.
00:55:05Dad's got visitors.
00:55:07A bunch of old guys.
00:55:08I don't know who they are.
00:55:09He made me play piano for them, like some kind of dresser doll.
00:55:13It's like freaking me out.
00:55:19Eric.
00:55:21Are you safe?
00:55:26Eric.
00:55:27Are you safe?
00:55:28Now, all those weird old men left last night.
00:55:33And I hexed my door so no one could get in.
00:55:36Don't let anyone in.
00:55:37If Dad tries to get you to play with any of those weird old men, just...
00:55:40I know.
00:55:41I'll just do what he says.
00:55:44I always do.
00:55:45I'm so sick of this E.
00:55:48What if he actually does make me marry one of those guys?
00:55:50I'm never going to let that happen, all right?
00:55:54Look, I'm close to getting the Wand of Light.
00:55:57The Wand of Light?
00:55:59Like, the one from the fairy tales?
00:56:01You can't tell Dad a secret.
00:56:04When I get the wand, you ready for my call?
00:56:07I have a plan.
00:56:09I barely know basic spells.
00:56:12I don't know if...
00:56:14You can.
00:56:15I know you can.
00:56:17When the time is right, you'll be ready.
00:56:45Filling up Bessie.
00:56:46Meet me downstairs when you're ready.
00:56:57Oh my God!
00:56:59Why do you and Mom always do that?
00:57:02A bit high-strung, aren't you, sis?
00:57:05I was just in the middle of thinking.
00:57:07Yeah, and going by your aura, I can guess about who.
00:57:10Very much giving post-orgasmic afterglow.
00:57:14Oh, yeah.
00:57:14Well, you and your little aura reading can go jump in a lake.
00:57:17Oh, aren't we feisty this morning?
00:57:20Your super-hot hubby isn't around, I'm guessing?
00:57:23Or have you already murdered him after catching his dick?
00:57:25I know all the best places to hide a body, by the way.
00:57:29I'm fine, Effie.
00:57:31I know all about Eric Spenson.
00:57:33I'm not stupid.
00:57:35And when we get the wand back...
00:57:36You mean if you get the wand back?
00:57:39We will.
00:57:40We will.
00:57:41And when we do, we'll do the divorce spell, this mark will be gone.
00:57:45I'll go home and marry the best person who serves our family alliance.
00:57:53It's not fair, you know.
00:57:55I know I'm the last person who should be saying that, because it's not like I can change it.
00:58:00But it's not.
00:58:03It's just the way it goes, right?
00:58:05There has to be a way for you to be with who you actually want, and be a good heir.
00:58:12Effie, what I want has nothing to do with anything in my life.
00:58:15That's fine.
00:58:17It's what it means to be a Sherwood.
00:58:19Just remember, repeating it doesn't make it true.
00:58:25Alright.
00:58:26Whatever you say, sis, you know best.
00:58:30I know.
00:58:32Give everyone a hug from me.
00:58:34Tell them I'll be back home soon.
00:58:45Last night was the last time.
00:58:47After today, we're done.
00:58:50If I say that enough times, maybe I'll finally believe it.
00:59:02I'll tell you about my plan with the wand.
00:59:06My family's magic is dying.
00:59:08My father's been cashing in on broken promises for years.
00:59:12But he holds most of the power.
00:59:13And me and Sieg, we just get to scratch.
00:59:15That's how he controls us.
00:59:18If I could use the wand just once,
00:59:21I could take his power away from the break.
00:59:24I'm not trying to ruin your family.
00:59:25I'm trying to save mine.
00:59:27It's the only way that we can be free.
00:59:30That's what you meant by trying to save your family.
00:59:34I was going to tell you the night before.
00:59:36I was going to tell you the truth.
00:59:38And then I was just going to ask if I could use the wand.
00:59:41Just once.
00:59:42And then I would do whatever you wanted.
00:59:44Get a divorce.
00:59:46Leave you alone.
00:59:47Forever.
00:59:48Why didn't you tell me?
00:59:52Why didn't you tell me that morning?
00:59:54Maybe things could have been different.
00:59:57I would have asked you to stay.
01:00:00It's a nice idea.
01:00:02But our families have been at war since the beginning of time.
01:00:05And then maybe if we were different people,
01:00:09we have different lives,
01:00:12this would have worked.
01:00:14Maybe we can.
01:00:16Maybe the wand has a spell for that, Eric.
01:00:19A witch can hope.
01:00:27What?
01:00:29Do I have mushrooms growing out of the side of my head?
01:00:32Why are you looking at me like that?
01:00:45Wait, I'm driving.
01:00:47Pull over.
01:01:06You have got to be kidding me.
01:01:15End of the line, witches.
01:01:25No!
01:01:38Eric!
01:01:45No!
01:01:46Eric!
01:02:03Now's not a good time, old man.
01:02:05Well, it sounds like my insurance policy worked.
01:02:09You...
01:02:11You set the shadow thief?
01:02:13Of course I set her.
01:02:14Do you think I would trust you to finish the job?
01:02:17Hmph.
01:02:27Demons are very expensive, you know?
01:02:31But I thought that the Sherwood girl's soul in exchange for the wand was a good enough bargain.
01:02:39Souls of magic users apparently taste better.
01:02:44Ha ha ha.
01:02:54You said you needed her alive.
01:02:55The Sherwoods will never pay off your debts if you kill their heir.
01:02:58I've reconsidered.
01:02:59Once I have that wand, I will be the most powerful witch alive.
01:03:05Debts won't matter.
01:03:06The stupid Sherwoods won't matter.
01:03:08And as for the girl, well, I don't need her breathing to use her power.
01:03:14I can always marry Sigrid off to form new alliances.
01:03:18Guess you won't be trapped in a marriage after all, son.
01:03:22You're welcome.
01:03:25Go to hell, old man.
01:03:37Take it!
01:03:40No!
01:03:43No!
01:03:43Your soul will be delicious!
01:03:45No!
01:03:47No!
01:03:47No!
01:03:47No!
01:03:48No!
01:03:49No!
01:03:49No!
01:03:49No!
01:03:52No!
01:03:54No!
01:03:55Only be free!
01:04:00Get off my wife!
01:04:08You'll pay for that, witch!
01:04:11Go!
01:04:21This isn't the last you'll see of me.
01:04:29Hey, I've got you.
01:04:31You didn't run.
01:04:33You're kidding?
01:04:34I'd be a pretty shitty husband if I let my wife's soul get sucked out by a demon.
01:04:41Eric!
01:04:42You can't get rid of me that usually.
01:04:44No, no, no, no, no, stay with me.
01:04:46Eric!
01:04:47Oh my God!
01:04:48Eric, no, no, no, no, no, stay with me.
01:04:51Oh my God!
01:04:53I can't save you, I don't have my powers!
01:04:57Why didn't you run?
01:04:59You could have saved yourself!
01:05:02I've been saving myself.
01:05:04My whole life.
01:05:06I thought I'd try something new.
01:05:09You idiot, you stupid.
01:05:11I'm a stupid, stupid idiot.
01:05:13Yeah.
01:05:16But I'm your idiot.
01:05:24You took a divorce spell.
01:05:26I had a promise.
01:05:28Now you're free.
01:05:32I don't want to be free.
01:05:35I don't want to be free.
01:05:38I want to be with you.
01:05:40Just keep secrets safe.
01:05:42Safe from my father.
01:05:44Safe from all of it.
01:05:48You know, those days in Vegas...
01:05:53We're the best three days of my life.
01:05:55All right, let's get this show started, okay?
01:06:00I love you.
01:06:02I love you too.
01:06:05I love you.
01:06:06I love you.
01:06:08I love you.
01:06:11I love you too.
01:06:14I love you too.
01:06:32The Wand of Light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires.
01:06:43Please, please, please.
01:06:54Eric, please.
01:07:06Lili.
01:07:07Eric.
01:07:09You absolute moron.
01:07:14You absolute moron.
01:07:16Be gentle. I was dead for like 10 seconds.
01:07:21You're alive.
01:07:23That is for divorcing me on your literal deathbed, you asshole.
01:07:27I thought I was doing something noble. Something cool.
01:07:31Did the wand give you your power back?
01:07:34My mom used to say that the wand's user grants it its deepest desire.
01:07:39I guess it knew what I really wanted.
01:07:43What did you want?
01:07:45You.
01:07:46You.
01:07:49Don't scare me like that again, okay?
01:07:52You know, I thought I heard something when I was bleeding out.
01:08:01Maybe you could say it again.
01:08:06Maybe you could say it again.
01:08:10I love you, Eric's Vincent.
01:08:14That's my girl.
01:08:17I love you.
01:08:18I love you.
01:08:34Let's go.
01:08:35Let's go.
01:08:35You ready for one last start?
01:08:38Yeah.
01:08:57Ah.
01:08:59There you are.
01:09:01I knew I could always trust a demon to get the job done.
01:09:06Now, where is my wand?
01:09:09Wait.
01:09:10You're supposed to be dead.
01:09:12Wow.
01:09:13You weren't kidding.
01:09:14He really is evil.
01:09:16I put a barrier around this whole house.
01:09:19It's impossible.
01:09:19There's no way you should be able to be in here.
01:09:21There's always a loophole, old man.
01:09:26Secret.
01:09:27You ungrateful brat.
01:09:29How dare you betray me like this?
01:09:31Really, Dad?
01:09:32Playing the family card after you almost sold me into child marriage?
01:09:36You ungrateful little pests.
01:09:45You're powerless now, old man.
01:09:47Your magic's gone.
01:09:49Forever.
01:10:03Eric, Aldous, Svensson, release me this instant.
01:10:07That is an order.
01:10:09You can handle it from here, right?
01:10:12His powers are gone.
01:10:13It doesn't scare me anymore.
01:10:16You ungrateful little brats.
01:10:18Both of you will pay for this.
01:10:20You will both pay for this.
01:10:25Yeah, yeah.
01:10:27Talk soon, pups.
01:10:28We're going to hit the road.
01:10:29I said get back here.
01:10:31I said get back here.
01:10:32Get back here.
01:10:34Please don't do this, you little bitch.
01:10:52So, where to now?
01:10:54Should we go and drop off the wand of life?
01:10:58Yeah.
01:10:59But there's something I want to do first.
01:11:02That sounds ominous.
01:11:05Just so happens that there's another full moon tonight.
01:11:09Leona Sherwood, are you asking me to hand fast marry you?
01:11:15Yeah.
01:11:17I think I am, Eric Svensson.
01:11:20Well, we better hurry.
01:11:21We're going to take the wand of light home and make it back in time to the hunk-a-hunk
01:11:25-a wedding chapel of love.
01:11:27I wonder if they have the same office.
01:11:29I sure hope so.
01:11:30Well, but if we're going to get hand fast married again, no more secrets this time.
01:11:36So, is there anything you want to come clean about now, soon-to-be-again husband?
01:11:42There is one thing.
01:11:46You might want to buckle up.
01:11:48We're about to go super speed.
01:11:50Bessie could have been going super speed this entire time.
01:11:53You didn't tell me to make our trip last longer, didn't you?
01:11:56You know me so well, soon-to-be-again wife.
01:12:02Leona Sherwood, will you marry me?
01:12:06And not because of some spell or because it's your duty, but because you want to.
01:12:15Yes, I will.
01:12:27Really?
01:12:28Hell yeah.
01:13:03You