- 8 hours ago
You Never Saw Me Mystery Romance
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00I know exactly how tonight ends. I've already died in it once.
00:04Cole Whitfield, starting QB, Yale football recruit, my childhood friend. I've always liked him.
00:09Ivy's birthday. Warehouse on Delancey. No one's checking. Midnight. Everyone's going!
00:18Cole, the SAT is tomorrow morning. That place serves real alcohol.
00:23My dad works the ER. He's treated kids from this school this year.
00:28More than once.
00:32Are you seriously doing this right now?
00:35Mara! It's my birthday.
00:39I even invited you. Can you just not?
00:47She's just mad Cole is doing something nice for Ivy.
00:50That night I called every single person. I was at the testing center at 7.30am.
00:55I made sure they all showed up. They aced the SAT.
00:58Then the results came in. And with them, the news. Ivy went to the warehouse alone.
01:05Someone dumped Everlight into the punch bowl. Ivy had three cups.
01:11Someone assaulted her.
01:13Cole decided it was my fault. Everyone agreed.
01:16If you hadn't stopped us, someone would have been there to protect her!
01:19They pushed me down the third floor stairwells. I died on the spot. Cole watched. When the police asked, the
01:26whole class said the same thing.
01:27I threatened them. And when they stopped me, I tried to run and fell. Every call I made that night
01:31became evidence against me.
01:33Someone found our address online. Someone poured gasoline at our front door and lit it.
01:38My parents were inside.
01:40Cole lived next door. He stood on the balcony watching the fire.
01:45Only after my parents stopped screaming, did he call 9-1-1.
01:49I found all of this out after I was already dead.
01:53I also found out the truth about Ivy.
01:56Every single piece of it was planned by her.
02:02Cole's voice reached me before I was fully awake.
02:07Is Mara actually coming? She's gonna kill the whole vibe.
02:11She rewrote two of my papers last month. She's useful.
02:14So what is she? Your tutor or your errand girl?
02:19Neither.
02:20She's just...
02:21She's always around. She likes being useful. It's basically her whole personality.
02:31That's all I ever was to him. Same 15 people. Same cheer. Same room. I'm back.
02:37Last time I lost everything. My parents. My home. This time I won't make the same mistake again.
02:44Mara, you're coming too, right? I did invite you. Have fun, Ivy.
02:49You're not going to lecture us?
02:51Nope.
02:52Last time you ran home and called everyone's parents, not this time.
02:54He grabbed my wrist hard. His other hand went into my bag and pulled out driver's license.
03:02No photo ID. No entry at the testing center.
03:08You know the rules. Stay quiet tonight. Don't ruin Ivy's birthday.
03:13And you get this back tomorrow morning. Simple.
03:15Cole is the QB. Nobody moves when Cole does something.
03:24Don't make this a thing, Mara. It's one night.
03:28Cole, that is the only thing I need to get into the testing center tomorrow.
03:32Give it back.
03:33Come with us and you'll have it back in the morning. Stop being difficult.
03:49Cole walked me to the old gym at the end of the hallway.
03:53No cameras back there.
04:00Relax. It's just one night. I'll come back for you after.
04:03Cole, I have a test tomorrow.
04:05Tonight is about Ivy. Not you. It was never about you.
04:09Something hard hit the floor outside the door. He stomped on my phone.
04:13Cole!
04:17His footsteps faded.
04:19Nothing left. Just the dark and the sound of my own breathing.
04:23I have a backup phone in my jacket pocket.
04:26I could call 911 right now. Officers would be here in five minutes.
04:30Cole's Yale recruitment would be gone tonight.
04:32But that's not what I want.
04:34I want Ivy's plan to run. I need her to believe she won.
04:38The only way this ends for good is everyone can see how deep the hole goes.
04:43I opened the screen recorder, hit record, started talking.
04:47My name is Mara Scott. Today is Friday, October 14th.
04:53Cole Whitfield, starting QB at Harlington Academy and Yale football recruit,
04:59just locked me in the old gymtasium.
05:02He took my driver's license so I cannot enter the SAT testing center tomorrow.
05:07Last time I had nothing.
05:09Just my word against 15 people who had already agreed on their story.
05:12This time, everything is on record before a single lie gets told.
05:17Forty minutes later, my dad found me.
05:20Who did this?
05:24Dad, do not go to the school. Do not call anyone.
05:27Mara!
05:27Do not talk to any other parents about tonight, no matter what you hear tomorrow.
05:31Promise me first.
05:33He looked at my hands. He looked at my face. He made the promise.
05:39We walked to the car. He did not ask anything else until the doors were closed.
05:47Tell me.
05:49I want to submit my McGill application tonight. Test optional early action.
05:55I don't need an SAT score. I want to leave.
05:58You've been putting that application off for three months. You said you wanted to stay because...
06:03I was wrong about what I was staying for.
06:10He did not push. He started the car.
06:17The last time I sat in a car in the dark waiting for something to be over was last fall.
06:23Three seasons of opponent breakdowns for Cole. One notebook a week. He never once asked who wrote them.
06:32I saw the car before he did.
06:35It came in from the far entrance. Too fast. No headlights.
06:39It was aimed at him. No time to think. I moved.
06:45The car didn't stop. It just drove away.
06:47I got up. My ankle was on fire.
06:50Cole was on the ground and not moving and I called 911 and I stayed with him until I could
06:55hear the sirens.
07:01I wrote. Good luck. I put it back.
07:05I stepped away before the paramedics reached him.
07:23I found out later that Cole woke up and the first face he saw was hers.
07:29I found out later what she let him believe.
07:33I wrapped my ankle myself. The cut was deep enough to scar. But the next day was Cole's game and
07:39I didn't want him to know.
07:41Cole didn't know I wasn't there until after the game. He won. He texted me one line.
07:46You missed it.
07:55You missed the game.
07:58I know. How's your head?
08:00Fine. Why weren't you there?
08:02Something came up.
08:03You knew how important this game was.
08:05He didn't notice my leg was hurt.
08:08That was the last home game of the season.
08:12He won. He got his Yale letter three months later.
08:16The notebook from that week is still in his bag. He carries it to every game.
08:21He has never once opened it in front of me. He does not know that the handwriting on the last
08:26page is mine.
08:27He thinks Ivy saved him. I never corrected it. I knew he wouldn't believe me.
08:38I opened the group chat on my backup phone. Party photos.
08:43Everyone packed into the warehouse. A big punch bowl in the center. The crowd was still cheering.
08:49Two people in the back were already on the floor. Someone posted another video from the party.
08:56Hey, where's your little girlfriend, Mara?
08:59She's not my girlfriend.
09:04Really? Can I ask her out then?
09:07I think she's kind of great. Why would you go for her?
09:12Prove it.
09:14It's just background.
09:29Coal burned my test ID. He knew how much that exam is meant to me. It just didn't matter to
09:37him.
09:39I opened my laptop. McGill portal. Early action. Test optional box. Uploaded everything. Hit submit.
09:50Last time I gave this up for Cole, I believed him. I stayed.
09:58I lost everything.
10:09Alcohol poisoning. A group of students. I have to go in.
10:19Stay at the hospital all day. If anyone asks you were there all night, do not come to the school.
10:24Do not let your name get into whatever story starts today.
10:28What story?
10:29The kind where they need someone to blame.
10:32Stay out of it. Promise me.
10:40I promise.
10:42He left. I sat in the quiet kitchen. Mom was humming in the other room. The coffee maker was running.
10:51Birds outside. Everything still here. They are not taking this from me again.
11:05Where is everyone? Testing starts in 30 minutes.
11:1012 students with alcohol poisoning last night. Police said someone spiked the punch bowl with Everclear.
11:16Three are in the ICU.
11:22Most of my top students are in the hospital right now.
11:31Mara. Good. You're here. Where's your ID?
11:34Cole Whitfield took my driver's license from my bag last night.
11:37He walked me to the back of the old gym and locked me in so I couldn't stop them from
11:40going to the party.
11:43I have it on video.
11:46My phone buzzed. Ivy had just gone live.
11:49We just wanted to celebrate. Mara told us the party was safe.
11:53She said she had been there before. She wanted us to go.
11:57She had a problem with Cole. She knew her dad worked at that hospital.
12:01I think she wanted something to go wrong.
12:04My son is in the ICU. You did this?
12:07No. I have the video. Everything from last night is on record.
12:11Cole just confirmed it on camera. You told them to go.
12:15I looked at the live stream. Cole's mouth was moving. He still would not look at the camera.
12:20The QB who throws touchdowns in front of 2,000 people every Friday night could not look at a camera
12:25right now.
12:26Everything from last night is uploaded and time stamped.
12:29Before any of you agreed on your story. You want to keep going? Go ahead.
12:33Ivy saw my phone on the stream. Her face changed. Just for a second.
12:38Cole finally looked at the camera. He was not angry. He was not confident. He was scared.
12:42There's one more thing I need to say. This is really hard for me.
12:46Mara's father is the attending physician at Mercy General right now. He is treating our classmates.
12:51I am not saying he did anything wrong on purpose. I am just saying if that was my child in
12:55that hospital,
12:56I would want to know.
13:00Get her father out of that hospital right now. He is not touching my kids.
13:03She set the whole thing up so her dad could finish the job.
13:09Every second of this is being recorded. You are all on camera right now.
13:14Let go of me. Get your hands off my daughter right now.
13:19You want to talk about last night? My daughter tried to stop your kids from going to that party.
13:23Your kids walked her to the back of the old gym, locked her in and took her ID so she
13:27could not even
13:28get into the SAT. I have the audio. You want to hear it right now?
13:33I opened my phone and went live. The truth about last night. 40 seconds in, 10,000 viewers.
13:40Ivy is still live right now. I'm going to play something she doesn't want you to hear.
13:45Tonight is about Ivy, not you. It was never about you.
13:48Now for the other thing. Mara, stop! Whatever you think you have-
13:52I've been in your private account, Ivy. The one you think no one knows about.
13:56Three weeks ago you told your friend you couldn't take the SAT because your grades are fake.
14:00Every score you ever posted came from someone else taking the test for you.
14:04That's insane. You can't prove any of-
14:08Screenshots are in the chat right now. Her own words. Her own account.
14:12Time stanks matching three weeks ago exactly. The comments went sideways. Ivy looked at Cole.
14:17He was staring at his phone reading the screenshots. His face was falling apart in real time.
14:20You knew. You knew the whole time and you-
14:23Cole, listen to me.
14:24My Yale Recruitment is under review because of last night. Because of you.
14:32Cole, we're live. Look at me.
14:34He stood up, knocked his chair over. He looked at the camera for one second. 40,000 people watching.
14:40Then he reached over and hit end stream on Ivy's phone. Her stream cut out. Mine kept running.
14:50Mara, I owe you an apology.
14:53Yeah, you do.
14:59You okay?
15:01I didn't get to take my SAT.
15:03I know.
15:03It's okay. I submitted my Miguel application test washable at 2am. I don't need the score.
15:09When did you do that?
15:10Right after Ivy sent me the photo of my burned ID.
15:13That's my girl.
15:14But she is not done. 20 minutes later, she texted me.
15:18This isn't over, Mara. The next morning, Cole showed up at my door.
15:23I'll go open the door.
15:29I need to talk to Mara.
15:30You need to leave.
15:33Please. Five minutes.
15:38Mom. It's okay.
15:40Mom looked at me. I shook my head slightly. She stepped back. I walked to the door. Cole looked
15:45at me. Something crossed his face that I had not seen before. Not confidence. Not his usual ease. Shame.
15:51Yale called. They're putting my recruitment on hold pending an investigation.
15:55I know.
15:56I didn't know. She faked everything. The grades. The scores. All of it.
16:00I know you didn't.
16:02Then why didn't you warn me? You knew. You had everything.
16:08Cole, you locked me in a gym. You stomped on my phone. You stood in front of 15 people and
16:16took my
16:16driver's license out of my bag. And you want to know why I didn't warn you?
16:24I need your help. If Yale pulls my offer, I lose everything.
16:28You want me to save your Yale spot?
16:30You're the only one who can.
16:33No. I am not calling Yale. I am not writing a letter. I am not doing one single thing to
16:38fix what
16:39Ivy broke. That is not my job. It was never my job.
16:42But you have the evidence. One call fixes this.
16:45I could. Last time something like this happened, I spent an entire night trying to save everyone,
16:50and I'm not doing that again. Last time? What does that mean?
16:56Go home, Cole. I'm sorry about the gym. About all of it. I know that doesn't fix anything.
17:03You're right. It doesn't.
17:06That afternoon, I went to the library. Third floor. I had work to do.
17:23Cole came to your house this morning. What did you say to him?
17:25Why don't you ask him? Is he not talking to you anymore?
17:34He's not going to suddenly realize he has feelings for you, Mara. You're just a tool he finds useful.
17:38A piece of paper. A notebook. He can throw you away just like that.
17:43Don't get too comfortable. Ivy will make sure you understand what happens next. You and your dad.
17:52I knew they were right. He had used me so long that being used had started to look like being
17:57close.
17:57I used to call it love. This time I won't. I have work to do.
18:09He sat there for an hour. I never showed up. Then he left. I don't know what he was waiting
18:16for.
18:17But it has nothing to do with me anymore.
18:21Two hours later, Ivy posted a statement. She called it a mental health crisis.
18:27She made a point of naming my dad. She called him the physician whose daughter orchestrated the entire
18:33incident. She attached a screenshot. A text from my dad to a parent saying he was aware of the
18:39situation and would handle it. The text was fake. My phone blew up. Unknown numbers. My dad's hospital
18:44page was flooded with one-star reviews. Someone filed a complaint with the state medical board.
18:49I called my dad.
18:51I see it.
18:53Don't respond to anything. Don't post anything. I'll handle it.
18:56Mara.
18:57Dad, do you trust me?
19:00Yes.
19:01Then let me work.
19:07I made one mistake. That Forge screenshot had no metadata. She had edited it out. But the original
19:14file still existed in the cloud backup of her account. The one she didn't know I could access.
19:20I had it in 20 minutes. The original file had a creation times tape. 11.47 PM.
19:27My dad had been asleep for two hours by then. His phone was charging in the bedroom.
19:32His location tag showed he was home. I sent everything to three places. The school board,
19:37the state medical board, and a reporter at the local news station who had been covering the SAT
19:41story since yesterday morning.
19:44Is this Mara Scott? I'm a producer at Channel 7. We'd like to give you the chance to respond
19:48to Ivy Munro's statement.
19:49No need to respond. Check your inbox. I just sent you something better. I hung up.
19:55Forty minutes later, Channel 7 posted a new segment. Forged evidence. New questions in the
20:01Harrington-Sate T scandal.
20:06The medical board complaint against my dad was suspended pending review. Dad called.
20:11What did you do?
20:14Exactly what I said I would.
20:17Mara, you can't keep-
20:18Dad, she tried to take your license your entire career. I am not going to sit and watch that happen.
20:27Come home for dinner. Mom made lasagna.
20:31That was his version of thank you.
20:36You're Mara Scott.
20:40Yeah.
20:42I'm Nate Kowalski. Hockey.
20:45I know who you are.
20:47Then you know I'm not one of Cole's guys.
20:49What do you want, Nate?
20:51I want to show you something.
20:53He showed me a screenshot from one of Ivy's private accounts, not the one I had accessed.
20:58Six months of messages between Ivy and a man I didn't recognize.
21:02My friend Marcus was supposed to get a full athletic scholarship to Boston College.
21:05Hockey. Full ride. He didn't get it because someone sent the scholarship committee an anonymous
21:10tip saying he failed a drug test. He never failed a drug test. The tip was fake.
21:17And you think Ivy did it?
21:19I know she did it. The anonymous email came from a school IP address and Marcus turned Ivy down when
21:26she asked him out sophomore year.
21:29You've been building a file.
21:32Four months.
21:33But I don't have what you have.
21:36You got into her accounts. I can't do that.
21:42Why are you coming to me now?
21:46Because you're the first person I've seen who isn't scared of her.
21:49That evening, Nate took me to meet Marcus.
21:52You're the one who went after Ivy.
21:55Yeah.
21:56She didn't just kill my BC scholarship. She told the committee I was dealing, dealing.
22:00I have never touched anything in my life. College coaches stopped returning my calls. My
22:06she was mad I didn't ask her to homecoming. I know. I'm going to get it back for you.
22:11How?
22:11Same way I handled everything else. I let her dig the hole. Then I show everyone how deep it is.
22:16What do you need from me?
22:17I registered for the November national test date. My scores came back in December. 1580.
22:22The highest in Harrington's recorded history. The school posted it on the announcement board.
22:26My name. My score. Right where Cole's football stats used to hang.
22:30You were holding back.
22:31The whole time.
22:33Three days later, Ivy came back.
22:39You think you won?
22:42This isn't over.
22:44Ivy, you forged evidence and filed a fake complaint against my dad's medical license.
22:50That is a felony. You should thank me for sending it to the school board instead of the DA.
22:56I found an email account she used for Marcus's fake tip. It's linked to three other accounts.
23:01She did this to other people. At least two more that I can find.
23:04Send me everything.
23:07Ivy didn't just go after Marcus. She has been doing this for years.
23:11There are other people out there who lost things they never should have lost.
23:14The first was Jordan Ellis, junior, track and field. She applied for the state
23:18Athlete Eatership Scholarship. Full tuition anywhere in the state. She didn't get it.
23:21The rejection letter said credible concerns about her character had been raised during the vetting process.
23:33I found the original tip in Ivy's archive. Same pattern. School IP address. Fake account.
23:40Sent the night before the scholarship committee met.
23:43I cried for a month after that rejection. My parents thought I wasn't good enough. I thought I wasn't good
23:48enough.
23:49You were always good enough. Someone made sure you didn't get the chance to prove it.
23:54Not anymore. The second was a kid named Dev Patel. Graduated last year. Full ride to Carnegie Mellon
24:01rescinded three weeks before move-in. Academic misconduct. Anonymous source. He spent the year working
24:08at a warehouse and reapplying everywhere. I sent him the file with one line. This is who did it. I
24:15thought you should know. I spent a year thinking I must have done something wrong and just didn't
24:22remember it. Thank you. I don't even have words. I heard about Jordan and Dev. Nate told me.
24:34Okay. How many people did she do this to? At least four that we found. Probably more.
24:41I dated her for eight months.
24:45I know. I gave her access. My coaches, my contacts, people who trusted me. She used all of it. And
24:54I had
24:54no idea. I'm sorry, Mara. Not just about the gym. About everything. Every time I could have paid
25:01attention and didn't. I know. Cole is starting to understand how much Ivy used him. Nate had practice
25:09until 9 p.m. on Thursdays. I started doing homework in the bleachers while he ran drills.
25:15The rink was quiet and no one bothered me. You're still here?
25:27Can I ask you something? Sure. Why didn't you put everything out on day one? You had the
25:34recording. You had Ivy's messages. You could have ended this in 48 hours. Because I wanted her to dig
25:40the hole herself. If I dump everything at once, it looks like an attack. People defend whoever is being
25:44attacked. But if I wait, if I let her keep moving and keep lying, eventually she's too deep to climb
25:50out and everyone can see it. That's cold. That's math. Three years at this school. Never seen anyone
25:59do what you're doing. Obsessively document everything? Not be afraid of her.
26:08Come on. I'll teach you to skate.
26:20Right now? The rink is empty until 10. I fell three times. The third time, he caught me before I
26:29went down.
26:30His hands were on my arms. Neither of us moved. You okay? I'm fine. He didn't let go right away.
26:39I didn't step back. When this is all over, where are you going? Miguel. Montreal.
26:49I might know someone at schools in that area. Is that right? Hypothetically.
26:56Ivy just filed a second complaint with the school board, claiming I had illegally accessed her
27:01accounts. She is filing legal complaints now. She's scared. She's swinging at everything. That
27:07means she is almost out of moves. Almost. But almost is not done.
27:14Ms. Scott accessed my client's private accounts without authorization. Any evidence obtained from
27:19those accounts should be excluded from these proceedings.
27:25Mrs. Scott, your response?
27:28Ivy's accounts had no protection. She used the same password for all of them.
27:31Her dog's name and her birthday. That's publicly available information she posted herself.
27:37That's not hacking. That's guessing.
27:39That characterization oversimplified.
27:41I also want to note that Ivy is raising unauthorized access concerns.
27:45At the same time, she forged a text from my father, filed a fake complaint with the state
27:51medical board, and sent fake anonymous tips that destroyed the futures of at least four students
27:56at this school. If we're talking about what to exclude, start there. I opened the folder.
28:01Every document, timestamped. The fake tip to Marcus's scholarship committee at Boston College.
28:06The email account traced. The forged screenshot of my dad's text. The matamata showing it was created
28:10at 11 47 p.m. while my father was asleep. Jordan's tip, devs, and the full pattern.
28:16Ivy Turney kept objecting. The superintendent kept overruling.
28:20I want to make a statement.
28:21Ms. Monroe, your attorney-
28:23I know. I want to speak for myself.
28:26She looked at me. For the first time since all of this started, there was no performance in her eyes.
28:30I did it. The tips, the emails, all of it. Because I was terrified.
28:37My entire identity at this school was built on something fake.
28:41And I knew it was going to fall apart. So I kept pushing people out of the way.
28:46So no one would be standing there when it did.
28:48Mrs. Scott, anything to add?
28:51I thought about Jordan crying for a month. Dev working in a warehouse.
28:55Marcus's face in the rink parking lot.
28:58I want Marcus Williams as his Boston College scholarship fully reinstated.
29:01I want Jordan Ellis's leadership scholarship reconsidered and the false tip removed from her file.
29:07I want Dev Patel's Carnegie Mellon rescission investigated and corrected.
29:11That's what I want. Ivy can deal with whatever comes next on her own.
29:19Ivy stared at me. She expected something else. A demand for punishment. A final blow. I didn't want
29:26that. I just wanted the people she hurt to get what they deserved. The panel voted to recommend
29:31expulsion pending a 30-day review. Marcus's scholarship committee at Boston College
29:36got a formal letter from the district the next day. Jordan's file was corrected.
29:44Cole texted me that night. Yael reinstated his recruitment offer.
29:49I know you didn't do this. That's not why I'm texting. Just thought you should know.
29:55They reinstated it. Full ride. Same terms. They said they'd hold my spot for January enrollment.
30:01That's great. Mara, thank you. Two words. He hung up.
30:10Nate texted 30 seconds later. He's been up since 5. Didn't want to call too early. He's been sitting
30:18there holding his phone for two hours. Last time I spent an entire night trying to save 15 people
30:25who didn't want to be saved. This time I did one specific thing for three specific people and it
30:30worked. I feel great. You fixed it.
30:40The committee fixed it. I just gave them what they needed. Don't do that. Don't minimize it.
30:46Okay. You're welcome. You could have just handled your own stuff and walked away. You didn't. So
30:51don't tell me it was nothing. And for what it's worth, half the school is on your side now. The
30:56half that matters.
31:01I know you could have pushed for criminal charges. You didn't. Why? Because I didn't need to.
31:07You already lost everything that mattered to you. I don't need to see you in handcuffs to feel okay.
31:12I just needed the people you hurt to get what was theirs.
31:20Ivy went quiet after that. The expulsion was finalized two days before winter break.
31:25She didn't come back. On the last day before break, Nate knocked on the library door.
31:30Ice rink. Tonight, Marcus wants to celebrate your coming.
31:43You actually came. You said Marcus wanted to celebrate.
31:47Marcus is fine. I wanted to see if you'd show up somewhere. That wasn't a library or a hearing room.
31:52Stop flirting and teach her to stop falling.
31:55Around 11pm, Marcus and Jordan went to find more food. Dev was on the phone. Just Nate and me at
32:00the far end of the ice.
32:04You're overthinking it.
32:08I'm always overthinking it. Yeah. I noticed. Stop thinking about falling. Think about where you want to go.
32:27You were already moving toward me.
32:32I saw you were going to fall. How?
32:35I've been watching you for a while, Mara. He didn't let go. I didn't step back.
32:40I know you're leaving in August. I know you have everything figured out.
32:44I'm not asking to be part of your plan.
32:49Then what do you want?
32:51Just this. Right now. Whatever this is.
32:55Okay.
32:56He kissed me. Simple and certain. Marcus wounded somewhere behind us.
33:01Jordan threw a napkin. Dev said something in another language and everyone laughed.
33:05I didn't even care.
33:08Winter break was two weeks. At Nate and I spent most of it together.
33:12Cole sent me a text. I didn't respond. I didn't need to.
33:15And then Miguel sent me my early action decision. Accepted.
33:18For the first time in a long time, the future felt like mine.
33:23The students who had been at the party took the next national test date. Most of them passed.
33:27Cole's Yale recruitment held. He signed his letter of intense in February,
33:31in the gym, in front of the whole school. His jersey number was painted back on the wall.
33:36Hey. Congratulations, Cole.
33:38Thank you. I mean it. You could have buried me. You didn't.
33:40I know.
33:41I'm going to spend a long time thinking about that gym.
33:44Good.
33:45I found something when I was clearing out my locker.
33:47I had not seen that notebook since last fall.
33:50I thought it was still in his equipment bag.
33:52He had taken it out. He was holding it with both hands.
33:55I always thought coach put these together for me.
33:57He always said the breakdowns came from the staff.
34:02I never questioned it.
34:04Three seasons of notebooks, and I never once asked who actually wrote them.
34:08I went back and compared this one to the others.
34:10The handwriting is the same across all of them. And it isn't coach's.
34:15This page is different from the rest of the notebook. The letters are uneven. The spacing is off.
34:21I kept trying to figure out why. Then I looked at the date on the cover.
34:24It's from the week of the parking lot.
34:26You were hurt when you wrote this, weren't you?
34:31It healed.
34:33Show me.
34:35Cole!
34:49You pushed me out of the way.
34:51You called 911. You stayed until the ambulance came.
34:55You went home and wrapped your own ankle. You wrote my game notes.
34:59And then you came to school the next day.
35:02And I told you that you should have been at the game.
35:06And then I spent a year telling everyone you were just background.
35:11I understood his regret. I used to imagine this moment would feel like something enormous.
35:16Relief. Release.
35:18Do you hate me?
35:19I thought about it.
35:26I did. For a long time. In another life. Longer than you'd believe.
35:31What does that mean?
35:32It means I don't anymore. But we're done here.
35:36I should have known. I should have known a long time ago.
35:42Take care of yourself, Mara.
35:44I thought about the girl who wrote that last line with blood in her sock and meant every word of
35:48it.
35:48I thought about the version of me who would have waited years for this moment.
35:52Who would have needed it.
35:53I didn't need it.
35:55Go to Yale, Cole. Be someone different than you were here. That's the whole point of leaving.
36:05I looked down at the notebook. He gave it back to me.
36:09That was the last real conversation we had. The last few months of senior year were the quietest of my
36:14life.
36:15I got something in the mail today. McGill ice hockey. Walk on invitation. They saw my stats from this season.
36:23Nate.
36:23I know. It's your school. I'm not assuming anything. I just wanted you to know.
36:27Are you going to accept?
36:31I already did.
36:32He put his arm around me and I leaned into him. We sat there in the quiet. The sun was
36:37out. I felt good.
36:40I thought about the girl who did the right thing in a parking lot and died for it. Feeling completely
36:45calm for the first time.
36:48I did not save anyone who didn't deserve to be saved. I did not protect people who used that protection
36:54as a weapon.
36:56I let the ones who were going to fall walk right into it. I kept my hands clean. I used
37:02those clean hands to give back what was stolen.
37:04That felt right. That was enough. There was one thing left. Tomorrow morning I was flying to Montreal.
37:11Tonight Nate said he'd drive me to the airport. But he had something else to say. I could feel it.
37:17My parents drove me to the airport.
37:19Mom cried. Dad didn't. But he held on a little longer than usual. And before he let go, he pressed
37:27a folded piece of paper into my hand.
37:30I opened it on the plane. His handwriting. At Mara.
37:35I don't know what you knew or how you knew it. I don't know what this year cost you.
37:41But you kept us safe. I see you. I love you, Dad.
37:46Nate was on a different flight. His parents were driving him up two days later. He texted me while I
37:50was waiting at the gate.
37:51Found a rink four blocks from campus. Open skate on Sunday mornings. Thought you should know.
37:59I'm still going to fall. I know. I'll be there.
38:12I thought about the version of myself. Who sat alone in a dark gym and thought that was the worst
38:18thing that would ever happen to her.
38:23She wasn't wrong. It was the worst thing. It happened. She came back from it and did something with it.
38:31That was worth doing.
38:36I know exactly how to nens. This time, it's all in my hands.
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