Abandoned on a Snow Mountain, I Became a Tycoon's Obsession - FULL MOVIE (Drama) - video Dailymotion

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Abandoned on a Snow Mountain, I Became a Tycoon's Obsession - FULL MOVIE

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00:05:19The version where she got to be the victim and the survivor and the heroine.

00:05:23It collapsed.

00:05:25You think you've won?

00:05:28You have money?

00:05:30You have a name?

00:05:31You have him?

00:05:32She tipped her chin at the corner.

00:05:34You spent seven years.

00:05:50You have a man who can be seen?

00:06:05i held her gaze still expecting me to cry his lab was built with my money her face flickered

00:06:09his instruments were bought with my money the paper he was about to publish used my data

00:06:15the first authorship he was angling for was built from 48 hours of my sleeplessness

00:06:19he picked up an empty suit an empty suit with my data printed on the inside lining

00:06:24so in about three weeks you'll be standing next to a naked suit with no career no grant tenure

00:06:28track no future paper tell me what the man is worth to you then she opened her mouth i cut

00:06:34her

00:06:35off my seven years are not for sale reagan not at your price not at any price get out she

00:06:43did not

00:06:43move a footstep behind her from the corridor garcia in the doorway two security guards a respectful

00:06:48distance behind sloan you think you've cleaned all of it up she picked up the lilies on her way out

00:06:53wait until the audit drops then ask damien crane what he found the door closed behind her i turned

00:06:58my head toward the corner chair damien was already standing he did not look at me he was looking at

00:07:03the door reagan had just walked through his jaw was set in a way i had not seen since the

00:07:07tent in

00:07:07wrangle he turned to me the look i caught the first time was a man assessing exactly how angry he

00:07:12should let himself become damien sat back down on the edge of the bed he took his time he did

00:07:16not

00:07:16rush he laced his fingers across his knee he breathed in once deeply the way i had seen him do

00:07:20at family dinners when his mother said something cruel and he chose not to make it a war sloan she

00:07:24has

00:07:24mastered clues that we do not know that's right it's related to auditing about the audit i waited

00:07:31he was choosing his word i was going to wait until tomorrow to bring this up the audit is not

00:07:36finished

00:07:36the number is not final how bad six million unaccounted for is the floor not the ceiling

00:07:43six million dollars was not a clerical error six million dollars was a pattern

00:07:49six million through what a shell company registered in delaware address goes to a people box the

00:07:56signatory is a name i'm running down the wire pattern matches equipment vendor payments diving

00:08:01rigs that never arrived drill bits that were never installed travel reimbursements for trips no one

00:08:06took for seven years for at least the last four i closed my eyes the money had never mattered

00:08:14my family had given the foundation more in any single year than what preston had pocketed in four

00:08:19what mattered was the shape of it the shape was he had been planning this since at least four years

00:08:23ago

00:08:24since the year he and i had taken a sabbatical month to iceland together the year he had asked

00:08:29me to marry him and then walked it back the same evening because it wasn't the right time

00:08:38damien i opened my eyes what does reagan have that we don't

00:08:45her name on a wire two of them so far

00:08:53she's not the graduate studies she's been pretending to be damien laid it out on the

00:08:57rolling tray table at my elbow two wire transferals both routed through the same delaware shell both

00:09:01signed at the receiving end by r snow the amounts were not enormous 84 000 112 000 both wired in

00:09:07the last

00:09:0714 months both dated to weeks reagan had been listed on preston's expedition minused as a junior

00:09:11research 84 000 for what equipment line item a piece of sonar gear that was never delivered

00:09:17she's 26 she's 26 on paper her undergrad was an internship at a foundation in connecticut

00:09:24whose director sat on three of preston's grant review panels

00:09:28she was she wasn't his accident she was his hire she was his hire

00:09:36how long have you known since the second wire cleared

00:09:42four months

00:09:46i was building i needed the chain to be unbreakable

00:09:50if you'd come to me sooner i'd have moved sooner

00:09:56i didn't know to come to you

00:09:58i know

00:09:59a nurse pushed open the door look at my face looked at the tray of documents looked at damon and

00:10:03quietly

00:10:03backed out damon picked up a fresh sheet from the bottom of the stack he turned it so i could

00:10:07see it was a screen grab of a private social media account locked one of two followers the

00:10:11western handle of a core counter the hand was not mine the post was dated two years before reagan

00:10:15had supposedly emailed preston out of the blue the pin post was a photograph of preston in

00:10:19cross and true seat or hand been vencible the wound throbbed once i let it damien

00:10:26she's been with him for at minimum three years

00:10:32three years three years was an entire fellowship cycle three years was a lab move three years was

00:10:38every conference where preston had told me he was too overwhelmed to bring me as a guest

00:10:42three years was the time during which i had been planning a wedding in my head

00:10:45while writing his grants in my hand i picked the photograph back up

00:10:49the hand on preston's cheek had a small mark at the wrist

00:10:52the same shape as a beauty mark reagan had very pale

00:10:55almost invisible against her skin

00:10:57i had once told her that mark was lovely

00:11:00she had told me she hated it

00:11:05how long until the audit drops

00:11:08friday three days

00:11:10how long until the criminal complaint files

00:11:14riley pope has already been brought in for questioning by the u.s attorney's office

00:11:17preston

00:11:18he'll be charged tuesday federal jurisdiction the beacon falls under interstate field safety regulations

00:11:23reagan reagan is more delicate the wires are evidence of fraud the relationship is evidence of

00:11:27motive the recording is evidence of intent but she'll lawyer up fast i expect her to flip on

00:11:31preston by the end of next week

00:11:32and the academic side

00:11:34marsh's ethics committee convenes wednesday at his university

00:11:37we are providing the audit the recording and the wires outcome is predictable he'll be stripped of his appointment his

00:11:43doctoral supervision rights his five

00:11:44most recent publications and the federal grant he was about to sign

00:11:49reaves dami did not blink

00:11:50reaves has known about the embezzlement for at least two years

00:11:53i closed my eyes he nominated you for the independent fellowship in part to diffuse internal questions about who your

00:11:59name kept appearing on the foundation paperwork and never on the bylines

00:12:02that's why he called me

00:12:04that's why a door opened

00:12:05i opened my eyes

00:12:06my father was standing in the doorway

00:12:08eyes red

00:12:09coats till on

00:12:10the wrinkles on his face deeper than i remembered

00:12:11you

00:12:12damien stood up

00:12:13he stopped two feet from damien and put both hands on damien's shoulders

00:12:15he did not look at me as he passed

00:12:16thank you

00:12:17my father had not cried in front of me since my mother's funeral

00:12:21he did not cry now

00:12:22exactly

00:12:22but he sat on the edge of my bed

00:12:24and held my left hand the one with damien's signet still on the forefinger

00:12:27and he did not let go for a long time

00:12:29don't talk

00:12:30he held my hand

00:12:31i have to

00:12:32sloan

00:12:32don't talk

00:12:33he looked at the signet

00:12:34he looked at damien standing very still by the window

00:12:37how long

00:12:3820 years sir

00:12:41i know that

00:12:42i mean the ring

00:12:44five days

00:12:45dad nodded once

00:12:46slow

00:12:53the pierces boy

00:12:54the one who used to follow sloan around the orchard at thanksgiving

00:12:58and pretend he didn't care if she shared her dessert

00:13:02yes sir

00:13:03dad almost smiled

00:13:05i told your father at the time

00:13:06told him what sir

00:13:08that you were going to be the kind of man

00:13:10who ran out of things to fear by the age of 30

00:13:17he didn't believe me

00:13:19he was wrong

00:13:22sweetheart

00:13:25the foundation is mine again

00:13:28as of this morning

00:13:29the board approved a clean break from the marsh laboratory and all of his ongoing projects

00:13:37the audit will be public when it drops

00:13:39your name will be cleared as of friday morning

00:13:42the donor wall in cambridge will be re-engraved with your sole credit on the whitfield climate initiative

00:13:49dad that's

00:13:50that's seven years of your life sloan

00:13:52not a favor

00:13:53he pressed my hand

00:13:55he stood up

00:13:56he kissed my forehead the way he had when i was a child home from school with strep

00:14:03i'm gonna step outside and let you rest

00:14:05i'll be in the hall

00:14:06i'll be in the hall

00:14:07he looked at damien

00:14:08crane

00:14:09sir

00:14:10when she's better

00:14:12we talk

00:14:15yes sir

00:14:18the door closed

00:14:22i looked at damien

00:14:23i had known him for a long time

00:14:26he gave you permission

00:14:27he sat back down on the edge of the bed

00:14:30he didn't have to

00:14:31i never asked him for any

00:14:36but yes

00:14:37he did

00:14:40i'll wait until you're ready

00:14:43for what

00:14:44he almost smiled

00:14:46not quite

00:14:47everything

00:15:00friday morning

00:15:01the audit dropped

00:15:01it hit the internet at 6 a.m. eastern

00:15:04a leak coordinated

00:15:05presumably

00:15:05by damien's communications team went to a science investigative reporter at a respected outlet

00:15:10by 8

00:15:11the headline had been picked up by every major u.s. paper

00:15:14by 10

00:15:15the hashtag was trending

00:15:16garcia walked into my room with a tablet and a tray of fresh squeezed orange juice

00:15:20216 articles since 6

00:15:22she tapped the screen

00:15:26glaciotology star falls in whitefield foundation fraud probe inside the regling cover-up

00:15:31i scrolled

00:15:32photographs of preston

00:15:33photographs of the rangel camp

00:15:35a still from the radio archive showing the time stamp on preston's order to disable my beacon

00:15:40a photograph of the equipment crate i had spent the night inside

00:15:43with claw marks down the side taken by a federal investigator the morning after my evacuation

00:15:48the comments were brutal if this is what academic excellence looks like this man let his girlfriend

00:15:54bleed in the snow for a grant the deputy who turned off her beacon should be in handcuffs by lunch

00:15:59i scrolled until i found reagan she had preempted the audit

00:16:04sloan whitfield could have died cry harder

00:16:08i closed the tablet

00:16:10how is preston taking it

00:16:11he has not been seen leaving his apartment

00:16:13the university has placed him on administrative leave pending wednesday's hearing

00:16:16riley pope has been charged

00:16:18he pleaded out

00:16:1918 months federal with cooperation

00:16:21reagan snow's lawyer issued a statement at 7 a.m. claiming she will fully cooperate

00:16:25reeves

00:16:25dr reeves announced his retirement at 6 30 effective immediately the university accepted within the hour

00:16:31i exhaled the wound did not mind anymore

00:16:34in a meeting he'll be back at noon he left this for you

00:16:37she slid a small white card onto the tray

00:16:40i picked it up

00:16:41by saturday i was sitting upright in a chair by the window

00:16:44by sunday i was walking the corridor twice a day with a nurse at my elbow

00:16:48by monday they had moved me out of the icu and into a regular suite on the 14th floor

00:16:53where the view stretched all the way down across the east river

00:16:56the flowers had started arriving friday afternoon and had not stopped

00:16:59the first arrangement was from my graduate school cohort

00:17:02the second from the foundation board

00:17:04the third and this one had made me sit up from the chair of the national science foundation

00:17:07who had written a personal note saying he had been appalled

00:17:10and that i should consider when i was well enough picking up the principal investigator role on the project

00:17:15that had been preston's

00:17:16the fourth came with no card

00:17:18you're upright

00:17:20i'm upright

00:17:22how does it feel

00:17:23like i have a hole in my chest but a much smaller one than yesterday

00:17:26he almost smiled

00:17:28from you

00:17:32narcissus

00:17:33from the lake house

00:17:38damien

00:17:38he met my eyes

00:17:41how long

00:17:44the flower

00:17:46since you were 12

00:17:48not the flower

00:17:49he sat on the edge of the bed

00:17:50i sat with that

00:17:51sloan

00:17:5220 years

00:17:52i was 29

00:17:5320 years

00:17:54that meant when i had cried to him about my freshman year boyfriend at 16 he had already known

00:17:58that meant every time

00:17:59over the long stretch of years

00:18:00he had appeared at the edge of my life with the precise timing of a person who was paying very

00:18:04close attention

00:18:05without ever announcing himself

00:18:06i looked at the signet on my left hand

00:18:10damien

00:18:16why didn't you ever say

00:18:18damien took a long time to answer

00:18:19the light from the window had begun to thin

00:18:22the kind of new york winter dusk that turns everything blue

00:18:25when you were 12 you were 12 there was nothing to say

00:18:29when you were 16 you were dating that boy

00:18:31you were happy there was nothing to say

00:18:33when you were 19 you came home from college and told me you'd met a graduate student named preston marsh

00:18:40you want to know what i thought of him

00:18:44i told you he was fine

00:18:46you told me he was fine

00:18:48he wasn't fine

00:18:50i knew he wasn't fine

00:18:53but you wanted permission

00:18:54you were not asking me what i thought of him

00:18:58you were asking me to bless what you had already decided

00:19:01you blessed it anyway

00:19:04i blessed it anyway

00:19:05why

00:19:06he looked down at his hands

00:19:08because if i'd said no you have done it anyway

00:19:10and i would have lost you for the next decade

00:19:12instead of being able to sit across a holiday table from you twice a year

00:19:16i made a calculation

00:19:18the calculation was wrong

00:19:20he looked up

00:19:22i would have made a different one

00:19:24if i had known

00:19:26known what

00:19:28that he would put a hole in your chest

00:19:29the room held the sentence

00:19:30i felt the wound stir

00:19:32it did not hurt the same way anymore

00:19:33it hurt differently

00:19:34like something was being said through it

00:19:36and not done to it

00:19:37it wasn't his hole

00:19:39it was an ice shard

00:19:40it was his hole

00:19:41he left you with it

00:19:43he turned off your beacon

00:19:45he drove away

00:19:46he did not soften the statement

00:19:47the shape of the wound is ice full

00:19:49and you crossed the country

00:19:51the cause of the wound is preston marsh

00:19:53i would have crossed any country

00:19:58damien

00:19:58he did not look away

00:20:04i'm not gonna forgive him

00:20:06i know

00:20:07i'm not gonna take him back

00:20:09i know

00:20:11i am however

00:20:12going to need a minute

00:20:19i've spent a lifetime waiting for you sloan

00:20:25take all the time you need

00:20:26he stood

00:20:27he bent forward

00:20:28his lips brushed my forehead

00:20:29light

00:20:29the way an older brother might

00:20:30the way a person who had been disciplined about a feeling for a very long time might

00:20:34when the door was finally cracked open

00:20:35i have a meeting at 7

00:20:37i'll be back at 9

00:20:38damien

00:20:41don't be late

00:20:42he almost smiled

00:20:44he left

00:20:45the narcissist on the windowsill held their pale yellow in the blue light

00:20:50tuesday afternoon

00:20:51preston was arraigned

00:20:52i did not watch the live stream

00:20:53gossier told me about it after the fact

00:20:56sitting in the chair by my bed with her tablet face down on her knee

00:20:59she summarized in her efficient

00:21:01neutral voice the same voice she used to read me the morning's flower deliveries

00:21:05preston had been processed through the federal courthouse in lower manhattan

00:21:09the charges were read loud

00:21:11federal embezzlement and wire fraud

00:21:14knowingly dissaying a fellow team member's emergency equipment in a hazardous environment

00:21:18and falsification of federal grant documentation

00:21:31his bail had been set at 1 million dollars

00:21:34his attorney had argued he was not a flight risk

00:21:37the prosecution had pointed to the whitfield foundation audit

00:21:40and to a passport that on inspection contained a sealed visa for a country with no extradition treaty

00:21:47his bail was set at 1 million dollars

00:21:49his attorney argued he was not a flight risk

00:21:51the prosecution pointed to the audit

00:21:54and to a passport with a visa for a country with no extradition treaty

00:21:58bail remained at 1 million dollars

00:22:00his passport was revoked

00:22:02how did he look?

00:22:04smaller

00:22:05smaller?

00:22:06at faculty fundraisers he carried himself like a man waiting to be the smartest in any room

00:22:11today he carried himself like a man waiting to be told what to do

00:22:15she set the tablet on the bedside table

00:22:17mr crane wants me to tell you

00:22:18wednesday's ethics committee hearing has been moved to 10 a.m

00:22:21the university requested that you attend by video link

00:22:24you may decline

00:22:26i'll attend

00:22:28mr crane suspected you would

00:22:32she rose

00:22:32is there anything else miss whitfield?

00:22:35one thing

00:22:38reagan

00:22:39she has not been arraigned

00:22:40the u.s attorney's office is finalizing terms

00:22:42she will testify against preston and dr reeves

00:22:45she will not be testifying against you

00:22:47she will likely receive limited immunity on the fraud charges

00:22:50a deferred prosecution agreement

00:22:52community service

00:22:53and a permanent bar from federally funded research

00:22:55she still has her social media

00:22:57she still has her social media

00:22:59the court cannot regulate that

00:23:01that's fine

00:23:03let her have it

00:23:04mr crane will be displeased

00:23:06mr crane will live

00:23:08garcia paused

00:23:09halfway to the door

00:23:11garcia tilted her head a fraction

00:23:12she almost laughed

00:23:14she left

00:23:14i lay back against the pillows

00:23:15and watched the narcissist tilt slowly toward the late afternoon sun

00:23:19wednesday morning

00:23:2010 a.m garcia rolled in a portable monitor on a tray and angled it toward the bed

00:23:24the ethics committee at preston's university convened on screen seven chairs around a heavy wood table in a panelled room

00:23:30i had been inside

00:23:30once during my own thesis defense

00:23:33when reeves had introduced me as one of his students

00:23:35reeves was not at the table today

00:23:37he had retired friday morning

00:23:39the chair of the committee

00:23:40a tall woman in her 60s whose hair was twisted into a low knot

00:23:43opened the proceedings

00:23:45mr marsh

00:23:46do you have anything to say before we begin

00:23:48preston rose from his seat at the foot of the table

00:23:50he had aged a decade in five days

00:23:52the polished hair was unkempt

00:23:54the pressed shirt was open at the collar without a tie

00:23:57i do

00:23:57his voice was flatter than i had ever heard it

00:24:00whatever the committee decides

00:24:01i accept

00:24:03i acknowledge the irregularities in the funding records of the regling expedition

00:24:08i acknowledge the irregularities in the authorship history of the manuscripts under review

00:24:15on the day of the avalanche i did not handle the evacuation of my team as i should have

00:24:20the chair did not soften

00:24:21i accept the consequences of those choices

00:24:24the committee has reviewed the audit

00:24:26the field radio archive the wire records and the personal contribution log of sloan whitstone

00:24:31the committee has also reviewed the statement obtained this morning under cooperation agreement

00:24:37from riley cope

00:24:39do you acknowledge that you transmitted a radio instruction to disable sloan whitfile's emergency locator

00:24:48the room was very still

00:24:51i do

00:24:55at the time you transmitted that instruction were you aware that sloan whitston was injured

00:25:00and at the edge of the camp perimeter

00:25:06i do

00:25:09mr marsh the committee finds the following

00:25:12you have engaged in academic misconduct of the most serious kind

00:25:18your conduct on the day of the avalanche

00:25:21endangered the life of a fellow expedition member

00:25:24the body of work submitted under your sole authorship for the past four years

00:25:29contains substantial material taken from the unpublished work of sloan whitnick without consent or attribution

00:25:39the committee recommends that your tenure be revoked your doctoral supervision rights be terminated and the five most recent publications

00:25:46under your name be retracted you'd be permanently barred from holding any federally funded academic appointment the regular climate proxies

00:25:52grant should be revoked and the funds returned do you wish to respond?

00:25:58preston was silent for a long time

00:26:00no

00:26:00then he sat back down

00:26:07the chair rose the committee rose with her

00:26:09this hearing is adjourned

00:26:11The screen went black.

00:26:17I sat for a moment in the dim hospital room.

00:26:20Garcia rolled the monitor away.

00:26:26It's done.

00:26:29It's done.

00:26:38He came on Thursday, not by appointment.

00:26:40There's a man at security in the lobby asking to see you.

00:26:43He's same.

00:26:45He said his name was Preston Marsh.

00:26:46I had told Garcia.

00:26:48He said he doesn't expect you to say yes.

00:26:51Let him up.

00:26:52That I would receive him.

00:26:53I had thought about it carefully.

00:26:54I had thought about it the way Damien thought about a chain of evidence not for spite, not for forgiveness,

00:26:59but to close the circuit.

00:27:00I had spent seven years inside that circuit.

00:27:02I needed to walk out under my own power.

00:27:05Damien was in a meeting on the other side of town.

00:27:07I had not told him I had agreed to this.

00:27:09I had not told him I had not agreed to this either.

00:27:11The door opened.

00:27:12Preston stood in the doorway.

00:27:14He did not come in.

00:27:15He looked exactly as he had on the video feed except smaller, somehow, in person, the way Garcia had said.

00:27:20The charcoal suit replaced by jeans and a sweater that did not fit him quite right.

00:27:23The glass is askew.

00:27:33Sloane.

00:27:34Get up.

00:27:35I won't.

00:27:36I'm not asking.

00:27:37He stayed where he was.

00:27:38I came to apologize.

00:27:43He breathed in once.

00:27:44At once.

00:27:46I owe you an apology I cannot make in two pages.

00:27:50I wrote it badly.

00:27:52Every grant.

00:27:54Every piece of equipment.

00:27:56Every late night.

00:27:59I knew.

00:28:00I always knew.

00:28:02I told myself a story about it that let me sleep.

00:28:05And the night of the avalanche.

00:28:07I told Riley to turn off the beacon.

00:28:12I told myself the Whitfields would send a plane.

00:28:15I told myself.

00:28:18You would always have a way out.

00:28:20That's what I told myself.

00:28:23So leaving you in the snow had no consequence.

00:28:33That's what I told myself.

00:28:35The room held it.

00:28:37I let it hold.

00:28:49Preston.

00:28:50He looked up.

00:28:51Get off the floor.

00:28:55I won't.

00:28:56You will.

00:28:58Because this is my room.

00:28:59In my hospital.

00:29:00In my city.

00:29:01And I'm telling you to.

00:29:03He got off the floor.

00:29:03He stood near the foot of my bed.

00:29:05Three things.

00:29:06Hands at his sides.

00:29:07Head still bowed.

00:29:08One.

00:29:09I am not retracting any of the charges.

00:29:12The federal case will proceed.

00:29:14Your career will not survive it.

00:29:16That is not negotiable.

00:29:19I haven't.

00:29:21Two.

00:29:22I will not be writing a victim impact statement that asks the court for leniency.

00:29:27I will be writing one that asks the court to apply the full weight of the statute.

00:29:32You are free to write your own.

00:29:33You are free to ask Dr. Revals to write his own.

00:29:37Understood.

00:29:38Three.

00:29:39Three.

00:29:41I looked at him for a long time.

00:29:44He had once been a man I would have crossed any distance to please.

00:29:47There had been a year possibly two when I had organized my entire life around the question of what Preston

00:29:52would think.

00:29:53I looked at him now and I felt nothing.

00:29:55Not contempt.

00:29:56Not pity.

00:29:57Not love.

00:29:58Not even anger.

00:29:59A clean nothing.

00:30:00The way you might look at a coat you wore through college.

00:30:02Hanging in the back of a closet and feel surprised that you had ever fit into it.

00:30:10I do not accept it.

00:30:17Not because it isn't sincere.

00:30:20Today, it might be.

00:30:21I think it might be.

00:30:23What I have learned in seven years of you is that your sincerity is a renewable resource.

00:30:29It comes back every time the consequences arrive.

00:30:32It always sound the same.

00:30:35It always asks the same thing which is for me to absorb the cost.

00:30:40I'm done absorbing the cost.

00:30:45You will live with what you did.

00:30:48I will not be helping you live with it.

00:30:51For a moment I thought he might say something more some version of the speech.

00:30:54Refine now to its purest form that he had been delivering to me.

00:30:57In fragments.

00:30:58For seven years.

00:30:59He didn't.

00:30:59He closed his eyes once.

00:31:01He opened them.

00:31:02I understand.

00:31:03He walked to the door.

00:31:04In the doorway.

00:31:04He paused.

00:31:06He did not look back.

00:31:07Sloan.

00:31:08Yes.

00:31:10Be happy.

00:31:13The door closed behind him.

00:31:15I sat alone in the hospital suite with the late afternoon light moving slowly across

00:31:19the floor.

00:31:19I waited to feel something.

00:31:21After a long time.

00:31:21I noticed what I felt was the absence of something.

00:31:24A weight I had been carrying since the year I was 22.

00:31:28For seven years I carried that weight.

00:31:30I turned my life into a project just to be seen.

00:31:34I piled up my efforts as evidence.

00:31:37But I don't need to be seen by him anymore.

00:31:42When I had decided that the rest of my life was going to be a project of making one specific

00:31:47man see me.

00:31:47It was no longer there.

00:31:49I picked up my phone.

00:31:51I texted Damien.

00:31:52Come back when you can.

00:31:54He answered within 10 seconds.

00:31:56On my way.

00:31:58Damien did not knock.

00:31:59The door to my hospital suite opened 12 minutes after Preston walked out of it.

00:32:03And Damien stood in the doorway with snow still melting on his shoulders.

00:32:06He did not look at me first.

00:32:08He looked at the chair where Preston had been kneeling.

00:32:10He looked at the spot on the carpet where Preston's knees had pressed two indentations.

00:32:14He looked at the trace of cologne.

00:32:16Preston's.

00:32:16Faint.

00:32:17Civilian still hanging in the air.

00:32:19He crossed the room in five strides.

00:32:22Did he touch you?

00:32:25Damien.

00:32:28Sloan.

00:32:29Did he touch you?

00:32:31No.

00:32:37His thumbs moved across my cheekbones.

00:32:39My temples.

00:32:40The line of my jaw checking.

00:32:42The way a person checks a child after they have fallen.

00:32:49I should not have left this morning.

00:32:51I asked Garcia to let him up.

00:32:56I know.

00:32:57She called me on the drive back.

00:32:59I broke three traffic laws.

00:33:01Damien.

00:33:02I would have broken 30.

00:33:10Look at me.

00:33:19I had not, in all the time I had known him.

00:33:22Seen Damien Crane afraid of anything.

00:33:24Not his father.

00:33:26Not his mother.

00:33:27Not a boardroom.

00:33:28Not a press conference.

00:33:30Not the leverage held over him by half of Manhattan.

00:33:34He was afraid now.

00:33:35He was afraid now.

00:33:36He was afraid that I had spent 12 minutes in a room with the man I had loved for seven

00:33:39years.

00:33:40And that 12 minutes was all it took for me to forgive him.

00:33:45I told him no.

00:33:48I know.

00:33:49I told him no.

00:33:50I told him to leave.

00:33:53I know.

00:33:54I am not going back to him.

00:33:57He closed his eyes.

00:33:58He pressed his forehead to mine.

00:34:00He stayed there.

00:34:01Breathing.

00:34:02For a long time.

00:34:08Sloan.

00:34:09Hmm.

00:34:11I am about to be very selfish.

00:34:14Be selfish.

00:34:17I do not want to leave this room again.

00:34:20Then don't.

00:34:23He did not.

00:34:34He did not sleep that night.

00:34:36The chair he pulled up to my bed was leather and too small.

00:34:39He folded himself into it anyway.

00:34:42He held my left hand inside both of his.

00:34:44And watched the heart monitor as if it might lie if he looked away.

00:34:47Sometime around 3 a.m.

00:34:50I pretended to be asleep.

00:34:51Just to see what he would do.

00:34:53He stood up.

00:34:54He walked to the window.

00:34:55He looked out at the East River for 10 minutes.

00:34:58He turned back.

00:34:59He stood at the foot of the bed and watched my chest rise and fall.

00:35:03Counting.

00:35:03With the precision of a man who had once counted my pulse on a medevac.

00:35:07Then he came back to the chair.

00:35:08He leaned in.

00:35:10He pressed his lips.

00:35:11Very lightly.

00:35:12To the inside of my wrist where the ivy line went in.

00:35:14He whispered into my skin.

00:35:31I am sorry I did not come sooner.

00:35:36When?

00:35:40You were awake.

00:35:42Sooner when, Damien?

00:35:48Eight years ago.

00:35:50When?

00:35:51The night you came home from grad school for the holiday.

00:35:55You laughed at something Preston said about a sample I had never heard of.

00:35:58I went home and painted 700 Nassaville on a wall.

00:36:03And decided I would wait.

00:36:06I should have come for you that night.

00:36:09Damien.

00:36:11I would have.

00:36:12If I had known how it would end.

00:36:14He looked at the signet on my fourth finger.

00:36:18I bought this a long time ago.

00:36:21This ring?

00:36:22This ring.

00:36:25For me?

00:36:26For the day I stopped waiting.

00:36:30I waited far longer than I should have.

00:36:32I am not waiting an hour longer than I have to.

00:36:35Damien.

00:36:37Hmm.

00:36:39What are you telling me?

00:36:40He met my eyes.

00:36:47I am telling you that the rest of my life starts at sunrise.

00:36:50When you walk out of this hospital.

00:36:52You walk into my house.

00:36:59And you do not walk out of it again unless I am holding the door.

00:37:05The next person who tries to take you from me.

00:37:08Will spend the rest of his life regretting it.

00:37:26Faster.

00:37:27Good.

00:37:35Discharge day.

00:37:36Damien did not let a nurse touch me.

00:37:38He sent the wheelchair away.

00:37:40He sent the orderly away.

00:37:42He scooped me out of the bed with one arm under my knees and one behind my shoulders and carried

00:37:46me.

00:37:47Slowly.

00:37:48The length of the corridor to the elevator.

00:37:50I had walked.

00:37:51By then.

00:37:52The length of that corridor on my own three times.

00:37:55I did not need to be carried.

00:37:57I did not object.

00:37:58The elevator opened in the underground garage.

00:38:01A black idled.

00:38:02He set me down only long enough to open the door.

00:38:04And then he lifted me again into the back seat as if the act of placing me there himself was

00:38:09something he could not delegate.

00:38:10Garcia.

00:38:11In the front passenger seat.

00:38:13Did not turn around.

00:38:14The pulled out.

00:38:15Damien did not let go of my hand on the drive up town.

00:38:29I bought the building.

00:38:31Which building?

00:38:32My building.

00:38:34I own the penthouse.

00:38:34I bought the rest of it last month.

00:38:36All of it?

00:38:37All of it.

00:38:39Why?

00:38:41I did not want strangers across a wall from you.

00:38:46Damien.

00:38:50The other residents have been compensated above market.

00:38:53They had 90 days to relocate.

00:38:55The last unit cleared on Friday.

00:38:57The building is empty except for the staff I vetted.

00:39:01And the floor I am going to put your father on if he wants it.

00:39:04My father has a house.

00:39:06He has a house.

00:39:07He may also have the eighth floor.

00:39:10Damien.

00:39:11You are being excessive.

00:39:14I am told I am being excessive.

00:39:17He brought my hand to his mouth.

00:39:20Tell me to stop.

00:39:21I am not telling you to stop.

00:39:24I can't bear to.

00:39:27The pulled into the garage.

00:39:31He carried me into the elevator.

00:39:33The doors opened directly into his foyer.

00:39:36Into the wall of painted narcissus.

00:39:38And he set me down in front of it.

00:39:46Look.

00:39:47Look.

00:39:47I looked.

00:39:48A second wall.

00:39:50Opposite the first.

00:39:51Had been painted in my absence.

00:39:53Cores.

00:39:54The shapes of ice cores.

00:39:5637 of them.

00:39:57One for every site I had drilled in 7 years.

00:40:00Labelled in white paint in my own handwriting.

00:40:01Which had been copied.

00:40:03Line for line.

00:40:04From photographs of the field journal Reagan had stolen.

00:40:08I could not speak.

00:40:16I commissioned it in March.

00:40:18The artist worked from your notebooks.

00:40:19I had the originals returned from the federal evidence locker on a temporary basis.

00:40:24They are now back in the locker.

00:40:26Damien.

00:40:27The paintings are yours.

00:40:29Welcome home Sloan.

00:40:31The first week in his apartment.

00:40:32I learned how he had been loving me for a long time.

00:40:35I learned it in small pieces.

00:40:37The way a person learns the contents of a house they have moved into without at all.

00:40:40A bookshelf in the library held every paper I had ever published even the undergraduate ones.

00:40:45Even the conference posters bound in matching cloth and arranged in chronological order.

00:40:50A drawer in the kitchen held my mother's recipe for soda bread.

00:40:53Hand copied from her handwriting onto a card he had laminated.

00:40:56A folder in his study.

00:40:57Kept in a drawer he did not lock.

00:40:59Contained years of photographs of me.

00:41:01Clipped from family Christmas cards and university newsletters.

00:41:05And the society pages.

00:41:06I found the folder.

00:41:07On the sixth day.

00:41:08I did not tell him I had found it.

00:41:10I sat on the floor of his study and turned through the photographs in order.

00:41:14And at the back of the folder I found a single envelope.

00:41:16Sealed.

00:41:17Addressed to me in his handwriting and dated a long time ago.

00:41:20I almost opened it.

00:41:21I did not.

00:41:22I left it where it was.

00:41:23That night at dinner.

00:41:24I asked him.

00:41:25The letter in the back of the folder?

00:41:27He set his fork down.

00:41:28He did not pretend to misunderstand.

00:41:30You found it.

00:41:32What is it?

00:41:34It is what I would have said to you that night if I had come for you instead of painting

00:41:37the wall.

00:41:38You kept it.

00:41:41I kept everything.

00:41:42Damien.

00:41:43I have kept the napkin you wrote your phone number on when you were eleven.

00:41:46I have kept the wrapper of the chocolate you split with me at your sister's Christensen.

00:41:49I have kept the program of every recital your mother dragged us to.

00:41:52I have kept the cockscrew you used to open the wine at your graduation dinner.

00:41:55I have kept the boarding pass you gave me when you came back from Iceland the year you turned

00:41:59twenty-three and asked if I would pick you up from JF because your boyfriend had forgotten.

00:42:04He met my eyes.

00:42:06I have kept all of it because I had to keep something.

00:42:08I set my fork down too.

00:42:10How many marriages did your mother arrange for you?

00:42:13Three.

00:42:15You refused all three?

00:42:16I refused all three.

00:42:19For me?

00:42:20Sloan.

00:42:22Everything I have ever refused I refused for you.

00:42:25His mother came on Tuesday.

00:42:26She had not.

00:42:27In the seven years I dated Preston.

00:42:29Sent me so much as a holiday card.

00:42:31She came now with a bouquet of pale pink peonies.

00:42:34And a smile that did not reach her eyes.

00:42:36And she sat across from me in Damien's living room.

00:42:39With the careful posture of a woman conducting a negotiation she expected to win.

00:42:43Damien stood by the window.

00:42:44He did not sit.

00:42:45He did not greet his mother.

00:42:47Sloan and dear.

00:42:48I came to welcome you.

00:42:49Mrs. Crane.

00:42:50I imagine all of this has been very overwhelming.

00:42:52The hospital.

00:42:53The press.

00:42:53My son's enthusiasm.

00:42:54His enthusiasm.

00:42:55He has always been intense.

00:42:58Particularly about the things he has wanted for a long time.

00:43:01I wonder if you have considered my dear whether intensity about this stage in your recovery

00:43:05is perhaps what you need.

00:43:06By the window.

00:43:07Damien turned.

00:43:08He did not raise his voice.

00:43:10Mother.

00:43:11Damien.

00:43:11You have ten seconds to walk out of this apartment.

00:43:16Damien.

00:43:17I am only.

00:43:18Eight seconds.

00:43:19You will not speak to me.

00:43:21Six seconds.

00:43:23The peonies.

00:43:24Untouched on the coffee table.

00:43:26Trembled with the vibration of the elevator returning to the foyer.

00:43:29She rose.

00:43:30She gathered her coat.

00:43:31She looked at me with the same smile pulled tight across her face.

00:43:34My dear.

00:43:35When this novelty passes.

00:43:37Two seconds.

00:43:37She left the elevator doors closed.

00:43:40Damien did not move for a long moment.

00:43:41Then he crossed the room and knelt in front of the chair where I was sitting.

00:43:45He took both my hands.

00:43:47Sloan.

00:43:48Damien.

00:43:49My mother will not be in this apartment again.

00:43:51Damien, she's your mother.

00:43:52My mother spent a long time telling me I would forget you if I tried hard enough.

00:43:55She introduced me to fourteen women whose family's my last name.

00:43:58She told my father at one point that I was an embarrassment to the family for refusing to marry.

00:44:02She does not get to walk in here now and call you a novelty.

00:44:04There is no version of this where you are second to anyone, Sloan.

00:44:08Not my mother.

00:44:09Not the company.

00:44:10Not the past.

00:44:12He pressed my knuckles to his mouth.

00:44:14Not for the rest of my life.

00:44:17He visited Preston in prison on a Wednesday.

00:44:20I did not know he had gone until he came home and sat across from me at the kitchen island

00:44:24and poured himself a glass of whiskey and told me.

00:44:27I went to see Marsh today.

00:44:28Damien.

00:44:29I had to.

00:44:31Why?

00:44:33I wanted him to see my face.

00:44:35He turned the glass in his fingers.

00:44:37He has been telling himself since the hearing that what happened to him was the system.

00:44:41That the audit broke him.

00:44:43That the federal prosecutor broke him.

00:44:45That the press broke him.

00:44:47I wanted him to know it was a man.

00:44:49What did you say to him?

00:44:52I sat across a steel table from her 14 minutes.

00:44:54I didn't speak for the first 10.

00:44:56He waited.

00:44:56He was the one who broke.

00:44:57He asked me what I wanted.

00:44:59I told him I wanted him to understand exactly what he had done.

00:45:02That he had touched a woman I had loved for a long time.

00:45:04That he had taken seven years of her life and gambled them on a press release.

00:45:09That he had left her in the snow because he assumed her family would clean it up.

00:45:12I told him that the part he didn't understand and would now have years to understand was

00:45:15that there had never been a moment in all the time he had known her when she was unprotected.

00:45:19I told him that he was alive only because you had asked me not to make a different decision.

00:45:22He drank.

00:45:25He cried.

00:45:27Damien.

00:45:27I did not enjoy it.

00:45:29Did you not?

00:45:30He set down the glass.

00:45:32I enjoyed every second of it.

00:45:34I'm not going to pretend otherwise.

00:45:35I sat across from a man who had hurt you and I watched him understand for the first time

00:45:39that he had been a small animal stepping on the tail of a much larger one.

00:45:43He came around the island.

00:45:44He stopped in front of me.

00:45:45He cupped the back of my neck the way he had cupped my skull in the tent.

00:45:49That is what I am, Sloane.

00:45:51With respect to you.

00:45:53I am the much larger animal.

00:45:55I will be that animal for the rest of your life.

00:45:57For any person who looks at you sideways, I am not going to pretend to be a different one.

00:46:00Tell me you understand.

00:46:03I understand.

00:46:04He pressed his forehead to mine.

00:46:07Good.

00:46:08Reagan called the apartment on a Thursday.

00:46:11She had been told.

00:46:12By every lawyer involved.

00:46:13Not to.

00:46:14The no contact clause was in effect.

00:46:16She called anyway.

00:46:17Through the main line of Crane Industries.

00:46:19Asking to be put through to me by name.

00:46:21The receptionist forwarded the call to Garcia.

00:46:24Garcia forwarded it to Damien.

00:46:25Damien answered on speaker.

00:46:27In front of me.

00:46:28At the kitchen island.

00:46:30Ms. Snow.

00:46:31Master Crane.

00:46:33I am calling because...

00:46:35You are calling because your book deal collapsed.

00:46:38Your father's foundation has been quietly delisted from three donor circles in the last six weeks.

00:46:42Your fiance's family has rescinded the engagement.

00:46:45Your apartment lease is not being renewed.

00:46:47And you have correctly disduced that all of this is connected.

00:46:51Silence.

00:46:51It is connected.

00:46:53Mr. Crane.

00:46:55I would like you to listen to me very carefully, Ms. Snow.

00:46:57The reason your life is currently coming apart is not because I am vindictive.

00:47:01I am perfectly capable of vindictiveness.

00:47:04I have not yet been vindictive with you.

00:47:06The reason your life is coming apart is because the woman whose career you tried to take.

00:47:10Whose data you stole.

00:47:11And whose recording I played in front of you in a tent at minus 31.

00:47:14Asked me three months ago to leave you alone.

00:47:16I have honored that request.

00:47:21I have, how however, not asked any other person who knows you did to honor it.

00:47:25It turns out there are a great number of those people.

00:47:28They are removing you, on their own, from the rooms they control.

00:47:32The book editor at the publishing house was a former student of Sloan's.

00:47:35The donor coordinator at your father's foundation served on a Whitfield panel four years ago.

00:47:38Your fiance's mother has been on the board of the Whitfield Climate Initiative since 2011.

00:47:43They are not retaliating, Ms. Snow. They are simply choosing.

00:47:47Mr. Crane, please!

00:47:48I am not the one you should be asking, Ms. Snow.

00:47:51He ended the call. He set down the phone. He looked at me.

00:47:55She will call again. She will eventually call you.

00:47:58She might.

00:47:59I would like permission, when she does, to make a small adjustment to her circumstances.

00:48:03What adjustment?

00:48:04A federal investigation currently dormant into the source of the wire that funded her Arigigrewit internship.

00:48:10Damien.

00:48:10I will only act if you tell me to.

00:48:13I looked at him for a long moment.

00:48:14I did not tell him to.

00:48:16I also did not tell him not to.

00:48:17He read my face.

00:48:19He nodded once.

00:48:20He poured me a cup of tea.

00:48:21The nights were the hardest.

00:48:23I had not, in seven years with Preston, slept poorly.

00:48:27I had slept on his couches and in his tents and across his shoulders on long flights.

00:48:31And I had slept the way a person who believed in the structure of her life slept.

00:48:35The structure was gone now.

00:48:37The nights showed it.

00:48:38I did not tell Damien.

00:48:39He noticed anyway.

00:48:41He noticed on the fourth night, when he came up to bring me a book I had asked for.

00:48:45And found me sitting on the couch by the south windows with the lights off.

00:48:49He set the book down.

00:48:50He sat next to me.

00:48:51He did not ask.

00:48:53He simply pulled me, carefully, against his shoulder.

00:48:56And we sat that way until the city lights began to thin toward dawn.

00:49:00On the fifth night, he came up at ten.

00:49:02On the sixth night, he came up at nine.

00:49:04On the seventh night, he stayed.

00:49:06He did not ask permission.

00:49:08He came up with a small leather bag and a book and the smallest, most contained smile I had ever

00:49:13seen on his face.

00:49:14And he said.

00:49:15Sloan, I am going to sleep in the second bedroom.

00:49:18The door will be open.

00:49:19If you need me, you say my name.

00:49:21You do not have to get up.

00:49:22You do not have to ring a bell.

00:49:24You say my name and I will be in the room in under three seconds.

00:49:27Damien.

00:49:28I am not asking for anything.

00:49:33I know.

00:49:34I am telling you that for the rest of your life, if you say my name in the dark, I

00:49:38will be there in under three seconds.

00:49:40He kissed my forehead.

00:49:42He went into the second bedroom.

00:49:44He left the door open.

00:49:45I lay in my own bed for the first hour.

00:49:47I listened to the sounds of him in the next room, the small zipper of the leather bag, the click

00:49:51of a lamp,

00:49:52the soft rustle of a turned page.

00:49:54At 1130, the page turning stopped.

00:49:57He had fallen asleep with the book on his chest.

00:49:59I got up.

00:50:00I crossed the hallway.

00:50:01I stood in the doorway of the second bedroom and watched him sleep a man in a charcoal pullover and

00:50:06reading glasses.

00:50:07In a guest bed in his own house, lit by a single lamp.

00:50:10He had been waiting a long time to sleep in the same hallway as me.

00:50:14I went back to my room.

00:50:15I left both doors open.

00:50:17I slept the whole night through.

00:50:18He gave me the cranes on a Sunday.

00:50:20I had told him, two weeks earlier, in the way a person tells a story that no longer matters.

00:50:25That as a child I had folded a wish into a paper crane and put it in a jar on

00:50:29my bedroom windowsill.

00:50:30The wish had been for my mother to get well.

00:50:32My mother had not gotten well.

00:50:34I had stopped folding cranes.

00:50:36He had said nothing at the time.

00:50:37He had simply nodded.

00:50:39He led me to the library that Sunday morning.

00:50:41He opened the double doors.

00:50:43The room three stories of bookshelves.

00:50:45A leather sofa.

00:50:46His piano against the back wall had been filled.

00:50:48Since I had last been in it the day before.

00:50:51With paper cranes.

00:50:52There were thousands of them.

00:50:53They hung from the ceiling on threads of clear nylon.

00:50:56In soft drifts.

00:50:57At different heights.

00:50:58In the pale yellow of winter narcissus.

00:51:00I stopped in the doorway.

00:51:02One thousand.

00:51:04Damien.

00:51:05One for every wish I have made for you since we were children.

00:51:07I kept count.

00:51:09He stepped into the room.

00:51:10He turned one of the cranes, gently, on its thread.

00:51:13I started after the year your mother died.

00:51:14I did not know what to do with the things I wanted for you.

00:51:16I started folding.

00:51:17I folded one a week for the first year.

00:51:19Two a week for the next.

00:51:20Sometime around my undergrout years I lost track.

00:51:22I counted them last month.

00:51:24There were 947.

00:51:26I folded the last 53 in the apartment downstairs while you were upstairs sleeping.

00:51:30I crossed the room.

00:51:32I touched one of the cranes.

00:51:33The paper was thin and cool.

00:51:35The crease was perfect.

00:51:37I knew the fold.

00:51:38It was the same fold I had used at 9.

00:51:40He had been folding cranes for me.

00:51:42Alone.

00:51:42In his apartment.

00:51:43For a long time.

00:51:46Damien.

00:51:46Hmm.

00:51:47What were the wishes?

00:51:48He looked at me.

00:51:49That you would grow up happy.

00:51:50That you would grow up loved.

00:51:52That you would grow up to do the work you wanted.

00:51:54That you would eventually be able to come home and rest.

00:51:58That you would eventually see me.

00:52:01That is the only wish I never finished folding.

00:52:03He reached up and unhooked a single crane from a thread above his head.

00:52:07He held it out to me.

00:52:08I would like you to fold the last one.

00:52:10I took the crane.

00:52:11It was a half fold.

00:52:12The paper waiting.

00:52:13The crease set.

00:52:14Damien.

00:52:15When you are ready.

00:52:18I am ready.

00:52:19I folded the last crane.

00:52:20The wish I folded inside it was that I had not taken so long to see him.

00:52:24I hung it on the empty thread.

00:52:26He held me.

00:52:27In the doorway of the library.

00:52:28For a long time.

00:52:32I kissed him that night.

00:52:34Not the careful kiss on the couch he had given me weeks ago.

00:52:37Not a kiss I was allowing him to give me.

00:52:39A kiss I gave him.

00:52:40I crossed the library after dinner.

00:52:42He was at the piano.

00:52:43Playing the eight notes my mother used to hum.

00:52:45He did not see me coming.

00:52:47I sat down next to him on the bench.

00:52:49I waited for him to finish the phrase.

00:52:51I tilted his face toward mine with two fingers under his chin.

00:52:54I kissed him.

00:52:55He went very still.

00:52:56For a heartbeat.

00:52:57He did not respond.

00:52:59Then he made a small sound not a word.

00:53:01Something quieter.

00:53:02A sound I had never heard him make in all the time I had known him and his hand came

00:53:06up to cut the back of my neck and the bench creaked because he had moved without thinking.

00:53:10He kissed me back the way a man kisses a person he has been kissing in his head every

00:53:14night for a long time.

00:53:15When he pulled back.

00:53:16Both his hands were on my face.

00:53:18His breath was not steady.

00:53:20His eyes had gone very dark.

00:53:21Sloan.

00:53:23Damien.

00:53:24I would like to say something.

00:53:26Say it.

00:53:29I have loved you for a very long time.

00:53:31I have loved you across continents and three engagements I refused and seven years of a

00:53:35man who was not me.

00:53:36I have loved you while you cried about other men in my passenger seat.

00:53:38I have loved you while you wrote thank you notes addressed to him on stationary I paid

00:53:41for.

00:53:42I have loved you while you called me at midnight to ask which dress you should wear to his department

00:53:46dinner.

00:53:46I have loved you in every shape a man can love a woman and still hide it.

00:53:50I am not going to hide any of it from this minute forward.

00:53:55Damien.

00:53:56Hmm.

00:53:58I love you.

00:53:59His hands tightened on my face.

00:54:01Say it again.

00:54:03I love you.

00:54:05Again.

00:54:06I love you Damien.

00:54:07He pressed his forehead to mine.

00:54:09For a long moment he did not move.

00:54:11He simply breathed.

00:54:12Then he picked me up off the bench carefully, with respect to the wound and walked me out

00:54:16of the library, past the wall of narcissus, into the foyer.

00:54:20He did not put me down at the elevator.

00:54:22He carried me into the bedroom.

00:54:24He set me, slowly, on the edge of the bed.

00:54:26He knelt on the floor in front of me.

00:54:28He took both my hands.

00:54:30I am not going to do anything tonight that I will not still be doing the night I die.

00:54:33He looked up at me.

00:54:34But I would like, tonight, to ask you one thing.

00:54:37Marry me.

00:54:38The cranes, in the library down the hall, turned slowly on their threads in the draft from

00:54:43the open window.

00:54:45Yes.

00:54:48Damien, yes.

00:54:49He did not let me go to Alaska alone.

00:54:51We had agreed, weeks earlier, that he would not come.

00:54:54He had said it himself in the kitchen that the right answer for my career was yes and

00:54:58the right answer for his heart was no.

00:55:00And that he would not be the one who decided which side of the snow line I slept on.

00:55:04He had meant it.

00:55:05He had also, the same night he meant it, started building a contingency.

00:55:09I found out about the contingency on the morning of April, 2nd.

00:55:13He came into the breakfast room with a folder under his arm and set it down next to my coffee.

00:55:17Sloney.

00:55:19Hmm.

00:55:19Crane Industries has launched a polar research division.

00:55:24When?

00:55:27Last week.

00:55:30Damien.

00:55:31The division is headquarters out of Anchorage.

00:55:33It is funding three independent scientific teams across the Rangel and St. Elia ranges.

00:55:38The director of the division is a 58-year-old former Nenoway scientist whose hire I personally

00:55:42approved at 3 a.m. on a Sunday.

00:55:44The director reports to a vice president of strategic operations.

00:55:48Damien.

00:55:48The vice president of strategic operations will be working out of a forward base camp in the

00:55:52English range from April 15th through the close of the field season.

00:55:55Damien.

00:55:56The vice president of strategic operations, me.

00:55:59I close the folder.

00:56:00You are not coming with me to the field as my boyfriend.

00:56:02I am not coming with you to the field as your boyfriend.

00:56:05You are coming with me to the field as the vice president of a polar research resention you invented in

00:56:10the last three weeks.

00:56:12With cover that will hold up to any audit.

00:56:15Damien.

00:56:16I will sleep in a separate module.

00:56:17I will not interfere with your team.

00:56:19I will not be on your your radio frequency.

00:56:21I will, however, be 300 yards away every night you are in the field.

00:56:24You did not have to do this.

00:56:26I had to do this.

00:56:29Why?

00:56:29He sat down across from me.

00:56:31He took my left hand.

00:56:33He looked at the signet ring he had slid onto it the night of the surgery and never asked back.

00:56:37Because the last time you went to that mountain without me, you came home with a hole in my mind.

00:56:42I am not living through that twice.

00:56:44I can take care of myself.

00:56:45I know you can.

00:56:47I am asking, please, for the rest of my life to never have to find out again.

00:56:52I looked at him for a long moment.

00:56:53I had spent seven years asking a man to follow me to airports.

00:56:56I now had a man who would follow me to ice.

00:56:59Alright.

00:57:00He brought my hand to his mouth.

00:57:04We landed in Anchorage on April 15th.

00:57:07He had flown commercial, three days ahead of me, to maintain the cover.

00:57:10He met me at the airport in a Crane Industries parka with a name tag that said D. Crane.

00:57:16VP Strategic Ops and a face so neutral that even I almost believed it.

00:57:20He shook my hand at the gate.

00:57:21He did not kiss me.

00:57:22He carried my carry on to the SUV.

00:57:25In the SUV.

00:57:26With the doors closed and the windows tinted.

00:57:28He took my face in both hands and kissed me as if he had not seen me in a year.

00:57:32Three days was too long.

00:57:35Damien.

00:57:35I am revising the cover.

00:57:37I will be sleeping in your module.

00:57:40That defeats the cover.

00:57:41I do not care.

00:57:44Damien.

00:57:45Three days, Sloan.

00:57:46He kissed me again.

00:57:47The cover, for the record, held.

00:57:50The cold weather medic worked it out the first night.

00:57:52Finn worked it out the second.

00:57:54Briggs, who had transported me out of the equipment crate at Wrangell in February.

00:57:58Worked it out before we even landed.

00:58:00Nobody said anything.

00:58:02Nobody had to.

00:58:03Damien did not hide that he watched me work.

00:58:05Damien did not hide that he ate every meal next to me.

00:58:08Damien did not hide that when I came back from the day's transects with snow in my hair.

00:58:12He met me at the door of the heated module with a towel he had warmed by the stove.

00:58:15The team, by week two, simply absorbed him.

00:58:19Finn said it best, late one night in the operations module, after Damien had stepped out to take a call.

00:58:24Sloan.

00:58:25Hm?

00:58:26I have seen a lot of men love a lot of women.

00:58:28I have never seen one love a woman like that.

00:58:31Like what?

00:58:32Like you are the only currency he has ever wanted.

00:58:35I did not have an answer for that.

00:58:37Finn went back to his clipboard.

00:58:38Damien came back in.

00:58:39He sat down next to me.

00:58:41He set a fresh cup of tea at my elbow without asking.

00:58:43He glanced at the medical chart on my clipboard, frowned slightly at one number on it, and said,

00:58:48Pulse is up.

00:58:50I just walked in from the field.

00:58:51That is not field walk pulse.

00:58:54Damien.

00:58:54I would like the medic to look at you tonight.

00:58:56The medic looked at me that night.

00:58:58The pulse was, as it turned out, fine.

00:59:01Damien did not apologize for asking.

00:59:03In the third week, I learned about the foundations.

00:59:06I learned about them by accident.

00:59:07The way I had learned about the wall of Narcissus, and the box of cranes,

00:59:11and the bound copies of every paper I had ever published.

00:59:14He did not volunteer.

00:59:15The.

00:59:16Information.

00:59:17I found it by following a thread.

00:59:19The thread was a small thank you note from a graduate student in Cape Town that arrived at base camp

00:59:23by satellite mail.

00:59:24The student had received a stipend from the Polar Atlas Foundation to attend a conference where I had given a

00:59:30keynote four years earlier.

00:59:31The note was effusive.

00:59:32It thanked me for the body of work and the foundation for the stipend.

00:59:36I had never heard of the Polar Atlas Foundation.

00:59:38I looked it up.

00:59:39Polar Atlas Foundation had given approximately $800,000 over the past nine years in small individual stipends to graduate students

00:59:47in glaciology, climate science, and polar geophysics.

00:59:51The recipient list was a precise map of every young researcher whose work had any tangential connection to mine.

00:59:56The foundation's board was three people.

00:59:59None of them I had heard of.

01:00:00I traced the LLC behind the foundation through three jurisdictions.

01:00:03It was Damien's.

01:00:05I traced four other foundations through the same pattern.

01:00:08Northern Light Trust.

01:00:09Ice and Salt Initiative.

01:00:10The 1,962 foundation.

01:00:14Named.

01:00:15I realized.

01:00:16For the year of the lock at the lake house.

01:00:18The Whitfield adjacent fellowship.

01:00:20Together, they had quietly dispersed about $11 million to young scientists in fields adjacent to mine.

01:00:26I confronted him about it that night in our module.

01:00:29He did not deny it.

01:00:30Damien.

01:00:31I funded your students.

01:00:34I do not have students.

01:00:36You will.

01:00:38I funded the field you were going to lead.

01:00:44Damien.

01:00:45He took my hand.

01:00:46I have been preparing the ground, Sloan.

01:00:48For a long time.

01:00:49I built the foundation network the same way I built the apartment in the wall.

01:00:52Not for you to notice.

01:00:54For you to land in.

01:00:55When you were ready.

01:00:56When you announce your own laboratory next year and you will.

01:00:58Every promising postdoc in the discipline will already have a personal reason to apply to you.

01:01:02I did not stack the dare because I did not trust you to win without it.

01:01:05I stacked it because I would rather you not have to fight for what should have been handed to you

01:01:09seven years ago.

01:01:09Damien.

01:01:10Yes.

01:01:11There is no part of my life.

01:01:13You have not been holding up from underneath.

01:01:15There is no part of you, Sloan.

01:01:17I am not willing to hold up from underneath.

01:01:19In the fourth week, he showed me Reagan's file.

01:01:21He had not brought it up since we landed.

01:01:23He brought it up only because, that morning, an emergency message had come through the satellite system.

01:01:29A tabloid in New York had published a photograph of me being carried, by Damien, off the medevac in February.

01:01:35The photograph had been bought from a freelancer who had snuck onto the helipad.

01:01:39The caption beneath the photo was a quote attributed, anonymously, to a close friend of Reagan Snow, suggesting that I

01:01:46had been romantically pursuing Damien Crane during my seven year relationship with Preston.

01:01:50Damien read it to me at breakfast.

01:01:52He did not raise his voice.

01:01:54He set down the satellite tablet.

01:01:55He picked up his coffee.

01:01:57He took a slow sip.

01:02:00Sklone.

01:02:02Damien.

01:02:03I am withdrawing my offer to leave her alone.

01:02:05Damien.

01:02:06She violated the no contact clause when she planted the quote, that is now her problem, not mine.

01:02:10The deferred prosecution agreement is forfeit.

01:02:13She will be charged with the underlying fraud on Monday.

01:02:15The federal investigation into her undergraduate funding will be opened on Tuesday.

01:02:19I would like to do one additional thing.

01:02:21He looked at me.

01:02:22I would like to release the recording.

01:02:24The full one.

01:02:25The recording Reagan's midnight phone call from the Wrangell command tent had been used in the ethics hearing, and in

01:02:30Preston's case, but the full audio had never been made public.

01:02:33The two minute clip the press had covered had only contained the part about the journal.

01:02:37The remaining 90 seconds contained the part where she had called me stupid for thinking money could buy a man.

01:02:42The part where she had described, in detail, the strategy of waiting for me to humiliate myself into walking away.

01:02:49The part where she had laughed.

01:02:51Release it.

01:02:52He did not blink.

01:02:53All of it?

01:02:54All of it.

01:02:55To the same outlet that ran the tabloid quote?

01:02:58To the same outlet.

01:02:59He took out his satellite phone.

01:03:01He made one call.

01:03:02The call lasted four minutes.

01:03:04By dinner, the recording was up.

01:03:06By midnight, it had been picked up by every major outlet that had covered the original audit.

01:03:11By the next morning, the tabloid that had run the quote had retracted it.

01:03:14By the end of the week, the publishing house that had originally pulled Reagan's book deal had publicly announced that

01:03:20it had also voided her advance contract for any future work.

01:03:23Reagan's snow did not surface in public again.

01:03:25Damien did not say anything about it.

01:03:28He did not have to.

01:03:29He had told me, weeks ago, that there had never been a moment in our entire acquaintance when I was

01:03:34unprotected.

01:03:35I was beginning, finally, to understand exactly what that had meant.

01:03:39I drilled Whitfield one the same day the recording went live.

01:03:42We had not planned the timing.

01:03:44The team had simply gotten to the site in the rotation, and the weather had cooperated.

01:03:48And Briggs had said, that morning, today is your day.

01:03:51Damien insisted on coming.

01:03:53He had not pressed to be on any other field site with me.

01:03:56He had stayed within his cover.

01:03:57He had let me work without his shadow on my shoulder.

01:04:00On the morning of Whitfield one, he did not ask permission.

01:04:03He came.

01:04:04He carried the equipment up the ridge himself.

01:04:06Even though Briggs had two team members ready to do it.

01:04:09He stood ten feet away while I drilled.

01:04:11He did not speak.

01:04:12I drilled.

01:04:13I loved the call.

01:04:14I labeled it.

01:04:15I stood up.

01:04:15I turned to look at him.

01:04:17He was watching me the way he had watched me come off the medevac at Teterboro a year before.

01:04:21Not breathing.

01:04:22Not blinking.

01:04:23Counting.

01:04:24With his thumb pressed unconsciously to the inside of his own wrist.

01:04:27Where he had once pressed it to mine.

01:04:29Damien.

01:04:31Hmm?

01:04:32I am alright.

01:04:33I know.

01:04:36This is the spot.

01:04:38I know.

01:04:39This is where I called you.

01:04:41This is where you called me.

01:04:42He took a step closer.

01:04:44He looked down at the snow.

01:04:45He looked at the small rise where the equipment crate had been.

01:04:47He looked at the lee of the outcrop where the walls had moved through.

01:04:50Then he knelt.

01:04:51He did not cry.

01:04:52He pressed his palm flat to the snow.

01:04:53The way a person might press a palm to a grave.

01:04:56He stayed there for a long moment.

01:04:57When he stood, his glove was wet through.

01:04:59He took my hand.

01:05:00I would like to ask you something.

01:05:02Ask.

01:05:03I would like to ask you to come back to this spot every year with me.

01:05:06On the anniversary for the rest of our lives.

01:05:08Not because it was the worst day.

01:05:10Because it was the day you called me.

01:05:12That is the day I want to keep.

01:05:13I closed my hand around his.

01:05:15Every year.

01:05:17Every year.

01:05:18Alright.

01:05:18Briggs.

01:05:1920 feet away.

01:05:20Very politely.

01:05:21Turned his back to give us privacy.

01:05:23We stayed at Whitfield 1 for 10 more minutes.

01:05:25When we walked back down the ridge.

01:05:27Damien did not let go of my hand.

01:05:29Briggs did not say anything about that.

01:05:31Either.

01:05:31We came home on May 28th.

01:05:34He had said.

01:05:34The night before we landed.

01:05:36That he wanted to be the one who drove me back from the airport.

01:05:39He had said it the way he said most things now calmly.

01:05:41With the assumption that I would not object.

01:05:43I did not object.

01:05:45He drove me back from Teterboro at 6am.

01:05:47M. On a Tuesday in late spring.

01:05:49The apartment.

01:05:50When we walked into the foyer.

01:05:52Had changed.

01:05:53The wall of course the one he had commissioned for me in March was the same.

01:05:56The wall of Narcissus.

01:05:57Opposite.

01:05:58Was the same.

01:05:59The piano was the same.

01:06:00The library.

01:06:01Three rooms down.

01:06:02Was the same.

01:06:03The bedroom had changed.

01:06:05He had moved his things in.

01:06:06His shoes by the door.

01:06:07His charcoal pullover folded over the back of the reading chair.

01:06:10His book on the bedside table on what had become.

01:06:13In the last two months.

01:06:14His side.

01:06:15Sloan.

01:06:17Damien.

01:06:17I am not asking permission.

01:06:19I am not asking you to.

01:06:20He smiled.

01:06:21It was the first full.

01:06:23Unmanaged smile I had ever seen on his face.

01:06:25He set my carry on down by the door.

01:06:27He picked me up.

01:06:28I have had a small panic.

01:06:30Every day.

01:06:30For six weeks.

01:06:31That you would change your mind on the plane.

01:06:33I did not change my mind.

01:06:34I know that now.

01:06:36Damien.

01:06:37Hmm.

01:06:37Put me down.

01:06:38No.

01:06:38I can walk.

01:06:40I know.

01:06:41He carried me through the foyer.

01:06:42Past the wall of cause.

01:06:43Into the bedroom.

01:06:44He set me.

01:06:45Very carefully.

01:06:46On the edge of the bed.

01:06:47He knelt in front of me.

01:06:49He took both my hands.

01:06:50He looked up at me for a long moment.

01:06:52I would like to ask you the question I told you I was going to ask you in the winter.

01:06:56Damien.

01:06:57It is May.

01:06:58I cannot wait until the winter.

01:06:59It's May.

01:07:01Sloan.

01:07:02He reached into his pocket.

01:07:03He took out a small velvet box.

01:07:05He did not place it on the piano this time.

01:07:07He opened it.

01:07:08Inside.

01:07:09On a small bed of pale cream silk.

01:07:11Was a ring.

01:07:12It was not the kind of ring I would have expected.

01:07:14Not from him.

01:07:15Not from a man who could have walked into any jeweler in Manhattan and chosen any stone

01:07:19in the city.

01:07:20It was a small.

01:07:21Deliberate band of brushed gold.

01:07:23Set into it.

01:07:24Almost flush.

01:07:25Was a single pale yellow sapphire.

01:07:27The color of winter narcissus.

01:07:29I knew the stone.

01:07:30I knew the stone.

01:07:31Because it had been in my mother's locket.

01:07:33The locket she had worn the day she died.

01:07:35The locket my father had been keeping in a velvet bag and a drawer in his desk for eighteen

01:07:39years.

01:07:40Damien.

01:07:41I asked your father six months ago.

01:07:44Damien.

01:07:45He gave it to me with both hands.

01:07:47Damien.

01:07:49Sloanie Whitfield.

01:07:50Damien.

01:07:51I will say it twice if I have to.

01:07:54Say it.

01:07:56I have loved you for a very long time.

01:07:59I built a life with one room in it.

01:08:01The room had no furniture and no light and one chair facing the door.

01:08:05I sat in the chair year after year.

01:08:07I sat in it through three engagements I refused.

01:08:09I sat in it through your seven years with another man.

01:08:11I sat in it through the night your mother died and the night you graduated and the night

01:08:15I painted the wall.

01:08:18I sat in it on the afternoon you called me from a mountain in Alaska.

01:08:21I have not been in that room since the day I picked you up off the floor of that tent.

01:08:25The room is gone now Sloan.

01:08:27The whole house is yours.

01:08:29Marry me.

01:08:30I had thought.

01:08:31For months.

01:08:32That when this moment came.

01:08:34I would say something simple.

01:08:35I had thought I would say yes.

01:08:37I had thought I would say yes because the word was small and complete.

01:08:40And did not need any of the surrounding architecture.

01:08:43Instead I sat on the edge of his bed.

01:08:44In his apartment.

01:08:45In front of the wall of cores he had commissioned for me.

01:08:48Holding my mother's yellow sapphire on its brushed gold band.

01:08:51And I started to cry.

01:08:53I had not cried since the helicopter.

01:08:54I cried now.

01:08:56He did not move.

01:08:57He did not say a word.

01:08:58He let me cry.

01:08:59After a long time.

01:09:00I said it.

01:09:03Yes.

01:09:03He closed his eyes once he opened them.

01:09:05Say it again.

01:09:07Yes.

01:09:09Again?

01:09:11Yes Damien.

01:09:12Yes.

01:09:13He slid the ring onto my fourth finger.

01:09:15Above the signet he had given me in the hospital.

01:09:18The brushed gold was warm.

01:09:19The yellow sapphire caught the morning light coming in off the east river.

01:09:22He stayed kneeling.

01:09:23He pressed his forehead to my knees.

01:09:25I bent forward.

01:09:26I rested my forehead against the crown of his head.

01:09:29We stayed like that.

01:09:30In the bedroom in his apartment.

01:09:31For a long time.

01:09:33After a while.

01:09:34He stood up.

01:09:34He picked me up off the edge of the bed.

01:09:36He did not.

01:09:37This time.

01:09:38Set me down anywhere.

01:09:39He carried me to the south windows.

01:09:41He stood there.

01:09:42Holding me.

01:09:43Looking out at the city.

01:09:44Mrs. Crane.

01:09:47Damien.

01:09:48I am rehearsing.

01:09:49Rehearse it once more.

01:09:52Mrs. Crane.

01:09:53Yes Damien.

01:09:54He smiled into my hair.

01:09:56He did not put me down for the rest of the morning.

01:09:59We were married in November.

01:10:00He gave me.

01:10:01In the months between.

01:10:02The kind of wedding that a man who has been planning a wedding in his head for a long time.

01:10:06Gives a woman who has been allowing herself to imagine one for 10 weeks.

01:10:10Which is to say.

01:10:11A small wedding.

01:10:12I had thought he would want a large one.

01:10:14He could have filled every cathedral in Manhattan.

01:10:16He did not.

01:10:17He picked the lake house.

01:10:18He picked a Saturday in late November.

01:10:20When the first snow was due.

01:10:21He picked the porch.

01:10:23He invited my father.

01:10:24Three of his cousins.

01:10:25Garcia.

01:10:26Briggs.

01:10:27Finn.

01:10:28My two graduate cohort co-investigators.

01:10:30The cold weather medic.

01:10:31The surgeon who had patched my lung.

01:10:33And the National Science Foundation chair.

01:10:35That was the entire guest list.

01:10:37His mother was not invited.

01:10:38She wrote him a letter the week before the wedding.

01:10:40He returned it unopened.

01:10:42He did not tell me he had returned it.

01:10:44Garcia mentioned it.

01:10:45In passing.

01:10:46On the morning of the wedding.

01:10:47The way she mentioned most logistical details.

01:10:49I asked him about it that afternoon.

01:10:51In the bedroom.

01:10:52While I was getting dressed.

01:10:54He buttoned his cuff.

01:10:55He did not look up.

01:10:56Damien.

01:10:57She asked.

01:10:58Two months ago.

01:10:59If she could attend.

01:11:01And?

01:11:03I told her she would be welcome the day she apologized to you.

01:11:06She did not.

01:11:07She did not.

01:11:09Damien.

01:11:11Sloan.

01:11:13She is your mother.

01:11:14She had 30 years to be my mother.

01:11:16She used that time to try to take you from me.

01:11:18I am not paying her interest on a debt she did not service.

01:11:21He buttoned the second cuff.

01:11:22When she is ready to apologize to you she may come to dinner.

01:11:25Until then she may live with what she chose.

01:11:28I crossed the room.

01:11:29I straightened his tie.

01:11:30Slowly.

01:11:31With both hands.

01:11:32Damien.

01:11:33Hmm.

01:11:34I love you.

01:11:35He caught my hands at his collar.

01:11:37He kissed both wrists.

01:11:38One after the other.

01:11:39Mrs. Crane.

01:11:40Not yet.

01:11:41In 43 minutes.

01:11:4243.

01:11:43I have been counting since 6am.

01:11:45He kissed me on the forehead.

01:11:46He turned me toward the door.

01:11:48Your father is waiting downstairs.

01:11:50Alright.

01:11:51Sklonen.

01:11:51Hmm?

01:11:52Walk slowly.

01:11:53Why?

01:11:53Because the next time you walk through a door toward me you are mine.

01:11:56I would like to remember every second of it.

01:11:57He cried at the ceremony.

01:11:59I had not expected him to.

01:12:00I had not thought it possible.

01:12:02He had been.

01:12:03For the entirety of the time I had known him.

01:12:05A man who had not visibly cried at a funeral.

01:12:08A wedding.

01:12:09A court ruling.

01:12:10Or a press conference.

01:12:11He had stood at his father's gravesite and not shed a tear.

01:12:14He cried on the porch of the lake house on a Saturday in November when he saw me come

01:12:18around the corner of the house in my mother's dress.

01:12:20My father saw it first.

01:12:22He squeezed my elbow.

01:12:23Look at him.

01:12:24I looked.

01:12:25Damien was standing at the end of the porch in front of the open front door.

01:12:29The brass lock.

01:12:30The lock that had held since the house was built was just behind him.

01:12:33His hands were clasped in front of him.

01:12:35His eyes were closed.

01:12:37Tears were moving.

01:12:38Slowly.

01:12:38Down his cheeks.

01:12:39He did not wipe them.

01:12:40He opened his eyes when I was three steps away.

01:12:43He smiled.

01:12:44It was the smile of a man who had been waiting a long time to use it.

01:12:47My father set my hand into his.

01:12:50Damien.

01:12:52Sir.

01:12:53She is yours.

01:12:54Sir.

01:12:55She always was.

01:12:57Dad smiled.

01:12:58He took his seat in the front row.

01:12:59The officiant.

01:13:00A friend of the family.

01:13:01Who had married my parents in the same spot long ago said a few words.

01:13:05He spoke about commitment.

01:13:06He spoke about the longevity of love that has been quietly held.

01:13:09He spoke.

01:13:10Briefly.

01:13:11About my mother.

01:13:12Who had taught him to make soda bread when he was a young man.

01:13:15Then he said.

01:13:16Damien.

01:13:17Your vows.

01:13:18Damien took both my hands.

01:13:20Sloan Whitfield.

01:13:21Damien Crane.

01:13:22I have loved you for a very long time.

01:13:23I kept a small notebook.

01:13:25The notebook had in it everything I learned about you that nobody else knew.

01:13:28The way you held your fork.

01:13:29The way you closed a door so it did not click.

01:13:31The way you ate the corners of a sandwich first.

01:13:33The way you bit your thumb before you took an exam.

01:13:36I do not need the notebook anymore.

01:13:37The porch was very quiet.

01:13:39He went on.

01:13:39I am keeping it for our daughter.

01:13:41I vow to love you with the precision and the patience of a man who has practiced.

01:13:45I vow to defend you the way I have always defended you.

01:13:48Which is publicly, immediately and without negotiation.

01:13:50I vow to bring you tea every morning and to play the piano for you every night.

01:13:53I vow to come home for dinner.

01:13:55Every night.

01:13:56For the rest of my life.

01:13:57I vow to never under any circumstances let you walk out of a room without telling you first that I

01:14:01love you.

01:14:02That is what I have for you Sloan.

01:14:03The rest is yours to ask for.

01:14:05I said my vows.

01:14:05I do not remember them.

01:14:07I remember only that when the officiant said you may kiss the bride.

01:14:10Damien did not move quickly.

01:14:12He moved very slowly.

01:14:13He cupped my face the way he had cupped it the day he came up off the floor of the

01:14:17tent in Rainbow.

01:14:18He kissed me.

01:14:19The first snow began.

01:14:20On cue.

01:14:21Behind him.

01:14:22We did not have a reception.

01:14:24We had dinner.

01:14:25Twelve of us.

01:14:26Around a long wooden table in the dining room of the lake house.

01:14:29With two of my cousins and my father and Garcia and Briggs and Finn and the medic and the surgeon

01:14:33and the National Science Foundation chair.

01:14:35Who had brought his wife.

01:14:37The food was simple.

01:14:38The wine was old.

01:14:39The conversation moved.

01:14:41The way conversations at lake houses move.

01:14:43In slow loops that did not need anywhere to go.

01:14:45After dinner.

01:14:46Damien played the piano.

01:14:48He played the eight notes my mother used to hum.

01:14:50He played the second eight notes he had written for me alone in his apartment.

01:14:54While I had been in Alaska drilling Whitfield one.

01:14:56He played a third set of eight notes I had never heard.

01:14:59He stopped after the third set.

01:15:01He turned to me.

01:15:02That one I wrote this morning.

01:15:03When this morning?

01:15:054am.

01:15:07Damien.

01:15:08I will write you a new eight notes every morning of our marriage.

01:15:12Damien.

01:15:13I have already started counting.

01:15:15Around midnight.

01:15:16The guests went to bed in the guest rooms upstairs.

01:15:18Damien took my hand.

01:15:20He led me out the front door.

01:15:21Onto the porch.

01:15:22And down the gravel drive to the boathouse at the edge of the lake.

01:15:25The boathouse was lit with a single lamp.

01:15:27He had had it cleaned.

01:15:29He had had a single chair placed inside it.

01:15:31By the window facing the water.

01:15:33He had hung and I almost laughed when I saw it every single one of the thousand cranes from the

01:15:37apartment library.

01:15:38They hung from the ceiling of the boathouse in soft drifts of pale yellow.

01:15:42And the lamp lit them from below.

01:15:44He stood with me in the doorway.

01:15:45Sloan.

01:15:47Damien.

01:15:48This is the last thing.

01:15:49The last thing.

01:15:49Every other thing I have done over all this time I have done quietly.

01:15:52I have folded a rain.

01:15:53I have painted a wall.

01:15:54I have learned a piece of music.

01:15:55I have bought a building.

01:15:56I have built a foundation network.

01:15:57I have refused a marriage.

01:15:59I did all of it quietly because you were not yet mine.

01:16:01This is the last thing I do quietly.

01:16:03He turned me to face him.

01:16:04From tomorrow I do everything loudly.

01:16:06I bring you flowers in front of every restaurant.

01:16:07I hold your hand at every board meeting.

01:16:09I introduce you at every event in this city as my wife for the rest of my life.

01:16:13Tell me you understand.

01:16:15I understand.

01:16:17Sloan.

01:16:18Welcome home.

01:16:19He cupped my face in both hands.

01:16:21He kissed me slowly.

01:16:23The way he had kissed me on the porch.

01:16:25And behind him the thousand cranes turned slowly in the draft.

01:16:28I had spent seven years thinking my life was a story about being seen by the wrong man.

01:16:32It had been.

01:16:34All along.

01:16:34A story about being held up from underneath by the right one.

01:16:37The right one was holding me.

01:16:39Now.

01:16:39In a boathouse at the edge of a lake at midnight in November.

01:16:42In front of one thousand paper wishes he had folded for me before he was thirty years old.

01:16:47The wish I had folded into the last crane.

01:16:49Months ago.

01:16:50Had been that I had not taken so long to see him.

01:16:52The wish I made now.

01:16:54Standing in the doorway.

01:16:55Was that I would have a lifetime wall.

01:16:57The end.

Abandoned on a Snow Mountain, I Became a Tycoon's Obsession - FULL MOVIE (Drama)

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