- 7 hours ago
Head Witch in Charge
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:25Jesus, Mom, can you at least warn me when you're gonna do that?
00:00:30Please?
00:00:30Oh, please. Don't be such a child. Do you still have the Wand of Light?
00:00:45See? The all-powerful magic heirloom. Still safe and sound.
00:00:50Well, you should be more careful.
00:00:51The Wand of Light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires.
00:00:56Yeah.
00:00:57And if it falls into the wrong hands, it would become the most dangerous weapon in the world.
00:01:03But a marriage to another noble witch family would only strengthen your power.
00:01:08Yeah.
00:01:09Unless it's an evil Svensson, right?
00:01:12The Svensons are our worst enemies, Leona.
00:01:16Do you know how much our family has suffered over the centuries because of them?
00:01:20I know. Sorry.
00:01:23You are the guardian of the Wand of Light, Leona.
00:01:27And you can't reach your full potential until you marry and succeed me as head of the family.
00:01:33Come home with a husband next week or I will pick one for you.
00:01:37What?
00:01:38Mom, no.
00:01:39Please don't.
00:01:40Leona Sherwood, you are getting married whether you like the boy I pick or not.
00:01:45Mom, please.
00:01:46Understand?
00:01:49Don't worry, Mom.
00:01:51I'm the responsible daughter. Remember.
00:02:01Okay, Leona Sherwood. This is your last weekend of freedom.
00:02:09For two more nights.
00:02:11Fuck my responsibility.
00:02:14I'm gonna have some fun.
00:02:28Thank you. That would be $25.
00:02:32I think you mean it's on the house, right?
00:02:36Right. It's on the house.
00:02:57There you are, little Miss Sherwood.
00:03:06Where the hell are you?
00:03:07I'm in Vegas like I said it would be old man.
00:03:09Hey, don't you get smart with me, you little shit.
00:03:13Remember your mission.
00:03:15Seduce the Sherwood heir and marry her and then that whole obnoxious family will be there to pay off our
00:03:20debts.
00:03:21You mean your debts?
00:03:22Quiet.
00:03:23It's bad enough that I have a sorry excuse for an heir.
00:03:26You are an embarrassment to the Spence in name.
00:03:29Now, if you don't marry the Sherwood girl like I told you,
00:03:33I am going to sell your little sister off to Old Fitzgerald to be his fourth wife.
00:03:39Dad, the secret is just a kid.
00:03:41When I want your opinion, I will ask for it.
00:03:44Until then, you shut up and do as I say.
00:03:47Do you understand?
00:03:49Yeah.
00:03:50Yeah.
00:03:50I understand.
00:03:52Good!
00:03:53And you!
00:03:54Keep practicing!
00:03:55You sound god-awful!
00:03:58Heartless fucking bastard.
00:04:14It's two of us.
00:04:16You're saying you don't remember me?
00:04:17Who remembers shipping it as dumb teens anyways?
00:04:20No way.
00:04:22Totally.
00:04:22I love that show.
00:04:23I watched it in one sitting at like 2am.
00:04:26This is one of my favorites.
00:04:27It definitely doesn't get the love that it deserves.
00:04:30But I think it's one of the best ones.
00:04:31Really?
00:04:33I never begged you for a sappy romance kind of guy.
00:04:38Looks can be deceiving.
00:04:44The wand of light.
00:04:46So it does exist.
00:04:48Maybe I'm just jaded.
00:04:50It's hard to believe that love like that actually exists in real life.
00:04:53Why not?
00:04:54We're witches.
00:04:56Monsters and magic exist in our world.
00:04:58Why can't true love?
00:05:01I am Lili, by the way.
00:05:04Lili Collins.
00:05:08Eric Phillips.
00:05:09Nice to meet you, Lili Collins.
00:05:12Damn, he's hot.
00:05:14And I'm in Vegas.
00:05:15I deserve a little fun.
00:05:16Oh, Eric Phillips.
00:05:19I'll be in the poker room tonight.
00:05:21Maybe I'll see you there.
00:05:23Maybe.
00:05:42Okay, Svinson.
00:05:44Don't fuck this up.
00:05:59Eric motherfucking Svensson
00:06:01Excuse me?
00:06:02You ghost me for three months after sleeping with me
00:06:04And you think you can sit there and act like nothing happened?
00:06:07I think you've got me confused with someone else
00:06:09Don't gaslight me, Svensson
00:06:11I know exactly who you are
00:06:27You know who she is?
00:06:29I think she's got me confused with someone else
00:06:35Thank you
00:06:43You nervous?
00:06:45Not at all
00:06:47You can always fold, you know
00:06:49I'd hate to send you home empty-handed
00:06:53Not a chance
00:06:55I'm here to win
00:06:57You sure?
00:06:58Seems like your focus is somewhere else
00:07:01Oh
00:07:03I am
00:07:04Very focused
00:07:06Hmm
00:07:07Are you guys done making Google eyes at each other or what?
00:07:12You're full of shit, Phillips
00:07:13I call
00:07:15Yeah, there is no way that you have this
00:07:19But don't worry
00:07:20I'll let you go another round
00:07:21Once I beat you
00:07:23Actually, I think I'm about to hit the jackpot
00:07:29Eric?
00:07:50I have wanted to do that since I saw you by the pool in your bikini
00:07:53Eric, everyone can see
00:07:57Do you want me to stop?
00:08:14Let him watch
00:08:16Give him a shower
00:08:28Wait, please don't stop
00:08:30Use your words
00:08:33Tell me what you want
00:08:35I want your tongue inside me
00:08:37Please
00:08:38That's a good girl
00:08:45Eric
00:08:49Wait
00:08:49Wait
00:08:50Wait, I think I'm gonna
00:08:53Was that some kind of vision?
00:08:58No
00:08:58That was from him
00:09:08Lucky son of a bitch
00:09:10Beginner Lux
00:09:12Let's see you do it again next hand
00:09:14No can do
00:09:16I have a date with a
00:09:18Very pretty lady
00:09:24Why do I have the feeling that you're not exactly as you present?
00:09:28Eric
00:09:29Phillips
00:09:31It is Vegas
00:09:33Isn't that part of the fun?
00:09:46No
00:09:47It wasn't very nice of you
00:09:49To tease me with your strap of your dress during our game
00:09:54It's very distracting
00:09:57Well you know it wasn't very nice of you
00:10:00To send me that little vision during our game
00:10:03I just wanted to give you a little sneak preview
00:10:14Eric, there are people
00:10:15And if you're quiet
00:10:17They won't see you
00:10:21I should stop
00:10:23This wasn't how the plan was supposed to go
00:10:24You knew you were right before
00:10:26I'm not who I say I am
00:10:28And who out there is exactly as they present
00:10:32But I am
00:10:33Look I don't care who you are outside of this
00:10:37For once in my life
00:10:38I
00:10:39I just want to forget about everything
00:10:42Just live in the moment
00:10:44And I think you
00:10:47Can help me do that
00:10:55Remove the camouflage
00:10:57I want you to see you
00:11:00The real you
00:11:02But then you'll know who I am
00:11:04I already know who you are
00:11:07The real you
00:11:09Wants to let go
00:11:15No one's ever looked at me like that
00:11:18He really wants me
00:11:20The real me
00:11:21Fuck
00:11:24You are gorgeous
00:11:27I want you
00:11:29I want you
00:11:30I need you
00:11:35Spread your legs for me
00:11:41Keep your eyes open
00:11:44I want you to watch yourself come
00:11:47All over my fingers
00:11:53Keep your eyes open
00:11:59I thought you said that they couldn't hear me
00:12:02They can't
00:12:03They can't if you stay quiet
00:12:04Keep your eyes open
00:12:06Or I'll stop
00:12:11That's a good girl
00:12:13Look down at my head
00:12:19Oh my god they hurt me
00:12:21Oh my god they hurt me
00:12:21They can't
00:12:22They can't
00:12:23Just relax
00:12:24I can't
00:12:26I can't
00:12:27It's okay
00:12:29Don't think
00:12:30Don't think
00:12:32Just fail
00:12:33Tell me anything
00:12:34It's so good
00:12:36But I need
00:12:38But I need more
00:12:38Eric
00:12:42You feel so good
00:12:44I can't wait to put my mouth on you
00:12:48So I'm going to make you come
00:12:51I'll beat you there
00:12:53I'm going to go down
00:12:55I'm going to want you to scream my name and let go
00:12:57Five
00:13:00Four
00:13:02Three
00:13:03Two
00:13:08One
00:13:28I can't believe I just came on his hand in front of other people
00:13:33I think this is your form
00:13:41I'll be at the fountain tomorrow at eight o'clock
00:13:45If you decide that you want more
00:13:47See you there
00:13:52You too
00:13:58How did he know what floor I was on?
00:14:06So you've told me all about your wild sister and the things that she's done
00:14:09Mm-hmm
00:14:11What about you?
00:14:15I'm the responsible sister
00:14:17The boring one, if you will
00:14:20And I do what I'm supposed to do
00:14:22All the rules and all that good stuff
00:14:25I don't believe you
00:14:27I mean, I know how you are in an elevator
00:14:29Oh, come on
00:14:33Come on
00:14:34It's Vegas
00:14:35Let me be your bad influence
00:14:37Just for tonight
00:14:41So
00:14:41Any bad ideas?
00:14:47Just one
00:14:54What are you doing?
00:15:07What are you doing?
00:15:16Mm
00:15:17Do you consider me rude
00:15:17Maybe we could take it slow
00:15:19Your lips say one thing
00:15:21But your body says something else
00:15:35Wait
00:15:37Shit
00:15:39I almost lost my cool
00:15:40I gotta remember the plan
00:15:44Oh my god
00:15:46I can't believe I just did that
00:15:47That was so embarrassing
00:15:48This is why I don't do crazy shit
00:15:50That was way too much
00:15:51Hey, you're never too much
00:15:54You don't understand, Eric
00:15:55Okay, if my family saw me do any of that
00:15:58They would freak out
00:15:59Tonight's not about your family
00:16:01Tonight's about you, remember?
00:16:03Forget what everyone else has told you to do
00:16:05Do something that you want to do
00:16:08Something no one would expect
00:16:10Maybe he's right
00:16:12I've spent my whole life doing what my family's told me to do
00:16:18For once in my life
00:16:20I'm doing something for myself
00:16:22She spotted the chapel
00:16:25Just like I planned
00:16:29So are you, uh
00:16:30Be sure about this marriage thing?
00:16:32It's only temporary
00:16:33Okay, and old magic is weak
00:16:35The hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning
00:16:39So
00:16:40Are you ready for a homie matrimony?
00:16:42I'm ready if you're ready
00:16:45Come on
00:16:49Let's go
00:16:55You nervous?
00:17:00Uh, it's my sister
00:17:08I need to take this
00:17:09Oh, yeah
00:17:10Take your time
00:17:11Elvis here wants me to pick out a hand fast bouquet
00:17:14Hey mama
00:17:14Let's get some flowers for you
00:17:15Come on
00:17:15Let's do it
00:17:17You need to come home
00:17:18Now
00:17:19I can't
00:17:20Secret
00:17:21Eric
00:17:21Dad's up to something
00:17:22He invited Fitzgerald to the house
00:17:24And made me dress up
00:17:26He looks at me weird
00:17:27It really freaks me out
00:17:28You were my big brother, E
00:17:30I need you
00:17:31Here
00:17:31Listen, I can't leave right now
00:17:33But I promise
00:17:34When I come home
00:17:36I'll have enough power
00:17:36To get rid of Dad forever
00:17:37Okay?
00:17:41Okay
00:17:41Hey
00:17:43Is everything okay?
00:17:45Yeah
00:17:48Yeah, it's fine
00:17:51You, uh
00:17:52You sure about this?
00:17:54It's only temporary
00:17:56Come on
00:17:57We'll be laughing about this for years
00:18:02Let's go
00:18:18Right
00:18:18Only temporary
00:18:20Unless you get hand fasted under a full moon
00:18:22Then the hand fast bond is nearly unbreakable
00:18:26But she doesn't know that
00:18:27And once she does
00:18:29She'll hate me
00:18:31Is your sister okay?
00:18:33Is something wrong?
00:18:36Nothing's wrong
00:18:37We're about to get married in Vegas by Ovis
00:18:39We're about to get married in Vegas
00:18:40What could possibly be wrong?
00:18:43Alright, you ready to rock and roll
00:18:45You hunk-a-hunk-a-hot couple?
00:18:48Let's get this show started
00:18:49Woo!
00:19:16this is it i have the wand of light the most powerful object in the world
00:19:23if i leave now i could use it to take control away from my father
00:19:27set secret and eye free
00:19:35but i already betrayed her once
00:19:41so
00:19:54so
00:19:55so
00:20:02so
00:20:19I'll have to get more chocolate strawberries.
00:20:22Be back soon.
00:20:32It's only temporary.
00:20:34Okay, and old magic is weak.
00:20:35The hand-fast bond will probably only last till the morning.
00:20:38Hmm.
00:20:40That's weird.
00:20:41The mark should have worn off by now.
00:20:51So, did you marry the girl yet?
00:20:56No, it's complicated.
00:21:01Complicated?
00:21:02Or distracted?
00:21:03You were sent there to marry the Sherwood heir and bind her power to this family, not to play house.
00:21:10You're a Svensson.
00:21:11Act like one.
00:21:12Eric is a Svensson?
00:21:16I married my family's worst enemy?
00:21:18I don't need you to tell me what I am.
00:21:21Then stop hesitating.
00:21:23If the rumors about the wand of light are true, we might catch an even bigger prize.
00:21:28So hurry up and marry the Sherwood girl and then bring her to me, idiot.
00:21:42He's been lying this whole time.
00:21:49I need to tell her the truth.
00:21:53You lying piece of troll shit!
00:21:56You didn't want me.
00:21:57You just wanted the fucking wand, didn't you?
00:22:01I didn't even know the wand existed until I met you.
00:22:03You still lied to me, Eric.
00:22:05You knew I was a Sherwood from the start.
00:22:07That's why you gave me a fake fucking name, right?
00:22:09Okay, I did, but that was before we did all...
00:22:11You lied before, before you decided to mess with me?
00:22:14Get your dick wet before you ruin me and my family forever?
00:22:17I'm not trying to ruin your family.
00:22:18I'm trying to save mine.
00:22:19Oh, I know all about you, Svensons.
00:22:22All you do is lie and cheat and steal to get whatever you fucking want.
00:22:27I should have caught it at the poker table, but your little tricks won't work on me this time.
00:22:33The hand fast, Mark, it'll fade.
00:22:35Just like you, just like whatever this was.
00:22:38The hand fast wasn't a trick.
00:22:40Not that part.
00:22:41Not with you.
00:22:43It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:22:45You will never, ever get the wand!
00:22:49Lily, what?
00:22:51When this fades, Eric, I will never have to see you again!
00:23:08So, that didn't happen.
00:23:12My older sister, Effie, told me that the mark would fade a week later.
00:23:17Then a month went by.
00:23:21Then, well...
00:23:25See, this is where you don't fuck with old magic.
00:23:28It's all fun and games, so there's a full moon.
00:23:31Then it's the most powerful magic in the universe.
00:23:37Apparently, getting a hand fast married under a full moon creates a bond that's almost unbreakable.
00:23:44Also, apparently, the almost part means that both people have to perform the divorce spell.
00:23:52I tried calling, texting, sending flying monkeys, nothing, not a single word from my beloved husband for half a year.
00:24:12Yes, I still sleep with a wand under my pillow.
00:24:16Now, the emotional ass whooping I got from my mother for getting hand fasted to a stranger was bad enough.
00:24:21No one can ever find out that I almost lost the wand, too.
00:24:26I just need one night to sleep without thinking about him.
00:24:54Who are you?
00:24:56What do you want with the wand of light?
00:24:59Nothing.
00:24:59Nothing. I'm just here to collect my payday from my client once I bring him that wand.
00:25:05Payday?
00:25:06Someone sent you!
00:25:07Who?
00:25:08I'm afraid I can't break client confidentiality.
00:25:10Sorry, sweetie.
00:25:13Well, I'm afraid that you chose the wrong witch to fuck with tonight.
00:25:29Be wise not to fight back, witch.
00:25:32You're in over your head.
00:25:34I'd rather die than let you take the wand.
00:25:39Suit yourself.
00:25:44Suit yourself.
00:25:45Suit yourself.
00:25:53What the fuck?
00:25:56What the fuck?
00:26:07What the fuck?
00:26:08Get off me!
00:26:09She had the wand!
00:26:11I got the wand.
00:26:13I'll get the rest later.
00:26:16No!
00:26:20You are the reason I lost the wand.
00:26:23Who are you?
00:26:29The hand fast mark.
00:26:34Hello, wife.
00:26:35Miss me?
00:26:39What are you doing here?
00:26:41Oh, well, you know I thought I'd spice up our marriage, do a little role-playing, but it looks like
00:26:45you're more into bondage.
00:26:47I didn't know you were so kinky.
00:26:48Shut up!
00:26:52Look, you shouldn't be thanking me.
00:26:54I did just save your house.
00:26:55Thanking you?
00:26:56You're the reason my family's most powerful heirloom is gone.
00:26:59How did you even find me?
00:27:02Wait a minute.
00:27:04You were trying to steal the wand, too, weren't you?
00:27:07Maybe.
00:27:09God, you slimy, tote-faced motherfucker!
00:27:13Okay, first, you tricked me into marrying you, then you ghost me for six months, and now you come in
00:27:19here like a goddamn fucking cartoon burglar and try to take my wand!
00:27:23Look, I was just gonna borrow it!
00:27:25Yeah, for one of your dirty, no-good Spenton schemes?
00:27:29I just...
00:27:30I need it, okay?
00:27:31It's...
00:27:33It's the only way that we can be free.
00:27:35Look, my dad doesn't know about our marriage.
00:27:38Not yet.
00:27:39But he knows about the wand. If he gets a hold of it, he's gonna sell it to the highest
00:27:43bidder.
00:27:43Whoever controls the wand has the power to take over the world. Or worse.
00:27:47No! Worse than tricking me into marrying you?
00:27:50I told you that that wasn't a trick.
00:27:52It doesn't matter, Eric. She has the wand, that shadow thief or whatever. And that's your fault!
00:27:59I can get it back.
00:28:02Look, I know I don't deserve it, but just give me one more chance.
00:28:07I can get the wand back, take care of what I need to take care of, and then I'll do
00:28:10the divorce spell.
00:28:12Please, Lili, just give me one more chance. Please.
00:28:15I can't trust him. I shouldn't. But my gut tells me, this time, it might be different.
00:28:29No. No, we're both gonna go get it.
00:28:34It is my job as a Sherwood heir to set things right, so I don't let the wand fall into
00:28:40the wrong hands.
00:28:41And you really think after Vegas, I would let you go alone to find the most powerful, magical object in
00:28:46the entire world?
00:28:48Fair. Uh, whatever you want. Lili.
00:28:52God, I hate when you call me that.
00:28:54All right. I'll call you wife. And you can call me whatever you want.
00:29:00Eric, husband, daddy.
00:29:02Shut up. Don't call me wife either. After we get this wand, we will do the divorce spell. Got it?
00:29:08You're breaking my heart. I mean, you're the better half of my soul.
00:29:13Yeah. You're not gonna sweet-talk your way into my pants again, Eric.
00:29:16We'll see.
00:29:22Now, the wand forbids a direct tracking spell, so we have to track its trail.
00:29:27That's a ten-mile radius. We'll never find a wand inside that circle.
00:29:30Well, with the tracking spell, I get a location, okay? It doesn't last long, though.
00:29:36We'll have, like, three or four days.
00:29:38Well, lucky for you. I already packed your bags.
00:29:42Consider it our official honeymoon.
00:29:48After this, we're done. You got it?
00:29:51Don't go back on your words, Vincent.
00:29:52We will do the divorce spell.
00:29:54Cross my heart.
00:29:56Hope to die.
00:30:15You imagicked a car here?
00:30:17This isn't just any car.
00:30:25This is Bessie.
00:30:27You really expect us to track down the most powerful, magical object in the world?
00:30:32In a car without a roof?
00:30:34I mean, if you're not comfortable, I could go by myself.
00:30:43If you trust me not to run away.
00:30:45Hmm.
00:30:46I wouldn't trust you with a half-eaten newt muffin.
00:30:49I was gonna throw in the trash.
00:30:53Then your chariot awaits, wife.
00:31:15Well, you've been driving all day, and she hasn't said a single word.
00:31:31You're Svensson.
00:31:32You don't play house with sheriffs.
00:31:34Wait, why are we turning?
00:31:35We don't have any time.
00:31:36We have to find the wand, Eric.
00:31:39That circle is getting further and further away.
00:31:42Plus, it's getting dark.
00:31:43We need to stay somewhere for the night.
00:31:44Why don't you just let me drive?
00:31:46Because you haven't slept either.
00:31:47Plus, no one can drive Bessie but me.
00:31:51What is with guys and cars?
00:31:53Jesus.
00:31:53No.
00:31:54I mean, literally, no one else can drive Bessie.
00:31:57My great-great-grandfather put a hex on all of our possessions.
00:32:00Anyone that's non-blood-related can't touch it.
00:32:03The Svensons like to hoard their treasures.
00:32:06Your family has issues.
00:32:08Finally.
00:32:09Something we can agree on.
00:32:11Was this your plan all along?
00:32:13It made me feel bad for you because your family's evil,
00:32:15so I get all ooey-gooey and forget about the divorce?
00:32:18Not everyone in my family is evil.
00:32:21Yeah.
00:32:22Okay.
00:32:35You cross this wall or do anything to piss me off more than you already have,
00:32:40then you do not even want to imagine the hex I'm going to put on you.
00:32:48I promise, no funny business.
00:32:52Pinky promise.
00:33:13Good night to you, too.
00:33:28In Vegas, you said you had a sister, right?
00:33:34Yeah.
00:33:36Sigrid.
00:33:38She didn't ask to be a Svensson.
00:33:41She's different than us.
00:33:43Better.
00:33:45Not like you?
00:33:47No.
00:33:49Not like me.
00:33:50But you already know that.
00:34:06I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:07I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:07I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:08I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:08I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:09I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:09I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:10I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:11I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:12I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:12I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:13I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:14I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:17I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:43Good morning, wife.
00:34:46I told you not to call me.
00:35:04You were saying something?
00:35:07What?
00:35:10How did you know I was awake?
00:35:13The husband always knows.
00:35:21Well, if you don't mind, I'm going to shower.
00:35:27No peeking.
00:35:32Cross my heart.
00:35:34Hope to die.
00:35:43I need to get a grip.
00:35:45Some washboard abs and a cocky grin aren't enough to make me fall for him.
00:35:50I just need this one time to take the edge off.
00:36:02I remember.
00:36:04He touched me like this in Vegas.
00:36:18Look.
00:36:19I'm so close.
00:36:25That's it, Lily.
00:36:27Be a good girl.
00:36:29And come for me.
00:36:37Are you ready?
00:36:43Eric.
00:36:57You said that you wouldn't look.
00:37:01I don't need to look to know what you were doing.
00:37:04Well, I'll think about me.
00:37:07God, you are so full of yourself.
00:37:09Do I know what I heard?
00:37:11Say another word and I'll turn you into a frog.
00:37:17What are you thinking about that time in Vegas where I ate you out in the shower?
00:37:23And you came so hard you almost crushed my skull between your thighs.
00:37:29I think about those times a lot.
00:37:32Yeah, well, I don't think about them at all.
00:37:59You still haven't even told me what you want the wand for yet.
00:38:03It's on a need-to-know basis.
00:38:05Oh, don't you think I need to know?
00:38:08I am your wife, after all.
00:38:11Oh, now you remember you're my wife.
00:38:13Funny how you only remember that when it's convenient for you.
00:38:15I remember every time I think about how badly I fucked up in Vegas.
00:38:19So all I am is a mistake.
00:38:20Eric, if I remember right, you're the one that suggested that we get handfast married.
00:38:25Obviously, that was before I knew about all your bullshit and lies.
00:38:29Duty and responsibility might not be a big deal in your family, but in mine, it's huge.
00:38:35See?
00:38:35There you go again.
00:38:36Always worried about what your family wants.
00:38:38It's never about what you want.
00:38:39I follow the rules because I have to, Eric.
00:38:43If I don't, I end up in situations like this.
00:38:45Did you ever stop to think that maybe that's unfair?
00:38:48That maybe your ideas and their ideas are bullshit?
00:38:53You ever think of that?
00:38:54Spoken like a true Spinson.
00:38:56Well, you're a Spinson too, sweetheart.
00:38:58Not much longer, I can tell you that.
00:39:19I'm going to get some coffee.
00:39:21It's getting dark.
00:39:22You really think you should be alone?
00:39:23So now that we're married, you think you have to babysit me too?
00:39:30Fine.
00:39:31Just don't take too long.
00:39:35You got her in the car or what?
00:39:38Who?
00:39:38Don't play done with me, boy.
00:39:41The little Sherwood witch you married.
00:39:43I forgot to tell me about.
00:39:46You thought I wouldn't find out, huh?
00:39:49You did a good job of hiding it.
00:39:50I'll give you that.
00:39:51Maybe you are my son after all, huh?
00:39:54What's the end game here?
00:39:56You said you just needed to get the Sherwood's wand so you could pay off your debts.
00:39:59What does she have to do with it?
00:40:00Because I'm not an idiot like you.
00:40:03I'll finally have all the leverage I need over the Sherwood family.
00:40:07When I tell them their pretty little heir is my new daughter-in-law.
00:40:12And then it'll be our family that gets to call the shots in the magic world.
00:40:16So you just want to use her?
00:40:18Like you use mom?
00:40:19Like you're using your own daughter.
00:40:21This is not a request, boy.
00:40:24Bring the girl and the wand to me or you will be stripped of your name.
00:40:28Your magic, everything.
00:40:29And your sister, she'll be the one paying the price for your mistakes.
00:40:44This isn't right.
00:40:45The trail should still be here.
00:40:48Would you like some coffee, Miss Sherwood?
00:40:50Yeah, thank you.
00:40:51Wait, how did you know my...
00:40:54You.
00:40:58But the map said that...
00:41:00That's cute.
00:41:02You think that dusty old map could track me?
00:41:09That wand is mine.
00:41:14Not anymore, it's not.
00:41:15And sadly, my employers need your powers too.
00:41:19Employer?
00:41:22Hold still.
00:41:23This will only hurt a bit.
00:41:25No, stop.
00:41:26Stop!
00:41:34Get away from her!
00:41:40Eric, the wand!
00:41:45Eric, the wand!
00:41:54My magic!
00:41:55She took half of my magic, Eric!
00:41:58You're okay.
00:41:58I got you.
00:42:00You're okay.
00:42:01You're okay.
00:42:03I don't understand.
00:42:05The map said that the wand was miles away.
00:42:08What did she want with my powers?
00:42:10The thief must have found some way to bypass the tracking spell.
00:42:13She can't have gone far.
00:42:14We'll find her.
00:42:15Lay low for now.
00:42:16Hey, Eric, stop the car.
00:42:17I can't breathe.
00:42:20Okay.
00:42:29Hey, hey, hey.
00:42:31Look at me.
00:42:31Look at me.
00:42:32You're okay.
00:42:33You're okay.
00:42:33Just breathe.
00:42:34I got you.
00:42:36You're safe.
00:42:38I thought she was gonna kill me, Eric.
00:42:41I'm not gonna let that happen.
00:42:43Not while I'm breathing.
00:42:57I still hate you.
00:43:01If you hated me, you wouldn't let me touch you like this.
00:43:05This doesn't change anything.
00:43:08Eric, it's only scratching an itch.
00:43:10Once we get the wand, when we do the divorce spell, now we forget each other existed.
00:43:21Is that what you want, Lily?
00:43:23You want to forget how good I make you feel?
00:43:26You want to forget I'm the only person in the whole fucking world who can make you feel this way?
00:43:36Eric.
00:43:39Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:43:47We can't do this.
00:43:51This is what goes wrong between us.
00:43:52We can't make that mistake again.
00:43:54We have a job to do, Eric.
00:43:56Let's get the wand.
00:43:58That's it.
00:43:59And then what?
00:44:01You know what happens after, Eric.
00:44:04We do the divorce spell.
00:44:06And we never see each other again.
00:44:07We have a job.
00:44:09We can't do this.
00:44:23We have a job.
00:44:39Smells like fresh baked pastries, cinnamon, old magic.
00:44:48I should have known.
00:44:50It's a satyr's inn.
00:44:53That's spelled.
00:44:54A nomen and habitus smell.
00:44:58It's woven into places like this for couples.
00:45:02You mean or cheese?
00:45:05Satyrs are the horniest bastards in the lone world.
00:45:08It lowers any fear, doubt, shame, grancy, or deepest desires.
00:45:16Without any fear of judgment or consequences.
00:45:28Here I don't.
00:45:31I'm trying not to.
00:45:41Here I don't.
00:45:44I'm trying not to.
00:45:51The spell doesn't create desire.
00:45:55It lets go of the lies.
00:45:57It tells us what we really want.
00:46:00What I want doesn't matter.
00:46:02It matters in here.
00:46:05Tell me what you really want.
00:46:07We can say goodbye.
00:46:10We can go our separate ways.
00:46:11Or you can tell me you want this.
00:46:15You want me.
00:46:18Tell me to stay.
00:46:22Stay here.
00:46:23Please.
00:46:25God, what is this?
00:46:27Is this just the magic?
00:46:29Hurry.
00:46:30Oh.
00:46:32It's not the spell.
00:46:34It's freedom.
00:46:37You can hear the outside world, does it matter?
00:46:40Just you.
00:46:41And me.
00:46:44I shouldn't want this.
00:46:46I know.
00:46:49I shouldn't be doing this.
00:46:53Or this.
00:46:55Be able to share with it.
00:46:58To the most respected family of the whole rich world.
00:47:02You definitely shouldn't sound this fucking sexy.
00:47:05To mind.
00:47:07You're with the ear.
00:47:09To the Sherwood family.
00:47:12Who are you?
00:47:13I want you, Eric.
00:47:16I need you.
00:47:20Tell me who you are.
00:47:24Lily.
00:47:25Close.
00:47:29But not quite.
00:47:32Tonight.
00:47:34Tell me who you are.
00:47:36Your wife.
00:48:01This doesn't change anything.
00:48:03I know.
00:48:05We can have tonight.
00:48:06And then tomorrow we go back to who we are on the outside.
00:48:10Sure.
00:48:11I'll go back to being my bad self.
00:48:13And you can go back to pretending to be a good little witch.
00:48:17Excuse me.
00:48:18Don't deny.
00:48:19Lily.
00:48:20Sherwood's been said.
00:48:21I know I'm kind of dark.
00:48:23Naughty thoughts you have.
00:48:26I don't.
00:48:28It's okay to be bad.
00:48:31You don't have to pretend.
00:48:35I don't, huh?
00:48:39You know, just because I have half my magic doesn't mean I can't play with you for tonight.
00:48:47No, you're gonna sit there like a good little witch.
00:49:07And I'm going to do whatever I want to you.
00:49:19I don't remember packing that lingerie.
00:49:21Close your eyes.
00:49:25Eric, you're so good for being such a bad boy.
00:49:32I'm being properly motivated not to move.
00:49:38See how long it takes you to break.
00:49:41For you, I could stay here forever.
00:49:43Pretty to think so.
00:49:45Why don't we test that little theory, huh?
00:49:49We're playing a dangerous game.
00:49:51All you have to do is admit that I win.
00:49:57I'll let you fuck me.
00:49:59I'll even let you come wherever you want.
00:50:06You can come here or here.
00:50:13I'll even let you come in here.
00:50:18God.
00:50:19Come on.
00:50:21I know you want her.
00:50:23Just admit that I'm right.
00:50:28Fine.
00:50:29You win.
00:50:30Oh, what was that?
00:50:33You hurt me.
00:50:34Oh.
00:50:48I could torture you like you did me.
00:50:53But I want to be inside you.
00:50:55I want to feel you squeeze me tight.
00:50:59And take me to bed, husband.
00:51:01And take me to bed, husband.
00:51:04Call me that again.
00:51:08You want me to fuck you, husband?
00:51:10Yeah.
00:51:12Fuck me.
00:51:20Tell me a story.
00:51:22Tell me a story.
00:51:24Like the ones you did in Vegas.
00:51:27I've got a story about my pet goat, Gilmore, and how he got stuck on a magic carpet.
00:51:35Or the story about how my sister tried to negotiate with a troll using only red images.
00:51:40I know.
00:51:43I already know about your family.
00:51:47I want to know about you.
00:51:50What's it like to be a Svensson heir?
00:51:53You want the insider info.
00:51:55Mm.
00:51:55Mm.
00:51:56You tell me yours, I'll tell you mine.
00:51:58Are you going to tell me how wonderful it was growing up as a beloved and blessed Sherwood?
00:52:08Is that what you think being a Sherwood is like?
00:52:12Is that what you think being a Sherwood is like?
00:52:14All fun and rainbows?
00:52:16Yeah, everybody loves your family.
00:52:18That's not true, Eric.
00:52:20There are so many people who would love it if we just disappeared.
00:52:24My mother has been shouldering all that responsibility and pressure for decades.
00:52:28And next year, I will be the head witch in charge.
00:52:32Everyone's counting on me to do the right thing.
00:52:34Like eat your fruits and veggies?
00:52:36Like spending my whole childhood being told that the whole world depended on me.
00:52:41Like never bothering to have any hopes or dreams because my whole life was planned for me from the very
00:52:48start before I was even born.
00:52:50I'm always doing the right thing for the family.
00:52:52I was never allowed to even think of doing the wrong thing.
00:52:56I couldn't be tired.
00:52:58I couldn't be scared.
00:52:59I couldn't be angry.
00:53:00One mistake and my family loses everything that they've ever worked for.
00:53:05If this whole world fades to black, it's because I messed up.
00:53:08It's because I didn't do a good job.
00:53:13I don't think I've ever said that out loud before.
00:53:16I'm glad you did.
00:53:19Your turn.
00:53:21Growing up with Vincent was a little different.
00:53:26The old man likes to say I was the first of his disappointments.
00:53:31I guess I guess it's good.
00:53:33At least I was first at something.
00:53:36I didn't care about disappointing him.
00:53:38I just wanted to get away from him.
00:53:41I had it all planned out.
00:53:42When I turned 16, I'd leave, change my name, and the Svensson bloodline would die with me.
00:53:48My mom died when Secret was born.
00:53:53My dad used to tear against me every day since.
00:54:03I'm so sorry, Eric.
00:54:05I shouldn't have asked.
00:54:09It's okay.
00:54:11The Svensons have always lived in the Sherwood shadows.
00:54:14We are the shadows.
00:54:19All you do is shine.
00:54:30You always ask me what I want.
00:54:34What do you want, Eric?
00:54:39You'd hate me if I told you.
00:54:41I mean, more than you already do.
00:54:46I don't hate you.
00:54:49I never did.
00:55:24Eric, something's wrong.
00:55:26Dad's got visitors.
00:55:29A bunch of old guys.
00:55:30I don't know who they are.
00:55:31He made me play piano for them, like some kind of dress-up doll.
00:55:35It's like freaking me out.
00:55:41Eric.
00:55:43Are you safe?
00:55:48Eric.
00:55:49Are you safe?
00:55:50Now, all those weird old men lived last night.
00:55:55And I hexed my door so no one could get in.
00:55:58Don't let anyone in.
00:55:59If dad tries to get you to play with any of those weird old men, just...
00:56:02I know.
00:56:03I'll just do what he says.
00:56:06I always do.
00:56:08I'm so sick of this E.
00:56:10What if he actually does make me marry one of those guys?
00:56:12I'm never going to let that happen, all right?
00:56:15Look, I'm close to getting the Wand of Light.
00:56:19The Wand of Light?
00:56:21Like, the one from the fairy tales?
00:56:24You can't tell Dad a secret.
00:56:27When I get the wand, be ready for my call.
00:56:30I have a plan.
00:56:31I barely know basic spells.
00:56:35I don't know.
00:56:36You can.
00:56:37I know you can.
00:56:39When the time is right, you'll be ready.
00:56:48Call and in.
00:57:07Filling up Bessie.
00:57:09Meet me downstairs when you're ready.
00:57:20Oh, my God!
00:57:22Why do you and Mom always do that?
00:57:24A bit high-strung, aren't you, sis?
00:57:28I was just in the middle of thinking.
00:57:30Yeah, and going by your aura, I can guess about who.
00:57:33Very much giving post-orgasmic afterglow.
00:57:36Aw, yeah.
00:57:37Well, you and your little aura reading can go jump in a lake.
00:57:40Oh, aren't we feisty this morning?
00:57:43Your super-hot hubby isn't around, I'm guessing?
00:57:45Or have you already murdered him after catching his dick?
00:57:48I know all the best places tied a body, by the way.
00:57:52I'm fine, Effie.
00:57:54I know all about Eric Spenson.
00:57:56I'm not stupid.
00:57:57And when we get the wand back...
00:57:59You mean if you get the wand back?
00:58:02We will.
00:58:03And when we do, we'll do the divorce spell.
00:58:07This mark will be gone.
00:58:07Then, I'll go home and marry the best person who serves our family alliance.
00:58:16It's not fair, you know.
00:58:18I know I'm the last person who should be saying that, because it's not like I can change it.
00:58:23But it's not.
00:58:26It's just the way it goes, right?
00:58:28There has to be a way for you to be with who you actually want, and be a good heir.
00:58:35Effie, what I want has nothing to do with anything in my life.
00:58:39That's fine.
00:58:41It's what it means to be a sure what.
00:58:43Just remember, repeating it doesn't make it true.
00:58:48All right.
00:58:50Whatever you say, sis.
00:58:51You know best.
00:58:54I know.
00:58:55Give everyone a hug from me.
00:58:57Tell them I'll be back home soon.
00:59:08Last night was the last time.
00:59:10After today, we're done.
00:59:13If I say that enough times, maybe I'll finally believe it.
00:59:26I'll tell you about my plan with the wand.
00:59:30My family's magic is dying.
00:59:32My father's been cashing in on broken promises for years.
00:59:35But he holds most of the power, and me and Sieg would just get to scratch.
00:59:39That's how he controls us.
00:59:42If I could use the wand just once, I could take his power away from the bread.
00:59:48I'm not trying to ruin your family.
00:59:49I'm trying to save mine.
00:59:50It's the only way that we can be free.
00:59:54That's what you meant by trying to save your family.
00:59:58I was going to tell you the night before.
01:00:00I was going to tell you the truth.
01:00:02And then I was just going to ask if I could use the wand just once.
01:00:06And then I would do whatever you wanted.
01:00:08Get a divorce.
01:00:10Leave you alone forever.
01:00:12Why didn't you tell me?
01:00:16Why didn't you tell me that morning?
01:00:18Maybe things could have been different.
01:00:21I would have asked you to stay.
01:00:24It's a nice idea.
01:00:26But our families have been at war since the beginning of time.
01:00:30Maybe if we were different people, we have different lives, this would have worked.
01:00:38Maybe we can work.
01:00:40Maybe the wand has a spell for that, Eric.
01:00:43A witch can hope.
01:00:51What?
01:00:53Do I have mushrooms growing out of the side of my head?
01:00:56Why are you looking at me like that?
01:01:10Wait, I'm driving.
01:01:12Pull over.
01:01:31You have got to be kidding me.
01:01:39End of the line, witches.
01:01:45Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
01:02:09No.
01:02:14Can't help.
01:02:16No.
01:02:18Oh, no.
01:02:28Now's not a good time, old man.
01:02:30Well, it sounds like my insurance policy worked.
01:02:34You...
01:02:36You said the shadow thief?
01:02:37Of course I said her.
01:02:39Do you think I would trust you to finish the job?
01:02:53Demons are very expensive, you know?
01:02:57But I thought that the Sherwood girl's soul in exchange for the wand was a good enough bargain.
01:03:04Souls of magic users apparently taste better.
01:03:10Ha, ha, ha, ha.
01:03:12Ha, ha, ha.
01:03:19You said you needed her alive.
01:03:21The Sherwoods will never pay off your debts if you kill their heir.
01:03:23I've reconsidered.
01:03:25I've reconsidered.
01:03:25Once I have that wand, I will be the most powerful witch alive.
01:03:30Debts won't matter.
01:03:32The stupid Sherwoods won't matter.
01:03:34And as for the girl, well...
01:03:35I don't need her breathing to use her power.
01:03:39I can always marry Sigrid off to form new alliances.
01:03:43Guess you won't be trapped in a marriage after all, son.
01:03:48You're welcome.
01:03:51Go to hell, old man.
01:04:03Take it!
01:04:08Your soul will be delicious.
01:04:17I can take dad's magic.
01:04:19End him.
01:04:21Finally be free.
01:04:26Get off my wife!
01:04:35You'll pay for that, witch!
01:04:48This isn't the last you'll see of me.
01:04:55Hey, I've got you.
01:04:57You didn't run.
01:04:59You're kidding?
01:05:00I'd be a pretty shitty husband if I let my wife's soul get sucked out by a demon.
01:05:07Eric!
01:05:08You can't get rid of me that easily.
01:05:10No, no, no, no, no, no.
01:05:11Stay with me.
01:05:12Eric!
01:05:13Oh, my God.
01:05:15Eric, no, no, no, no, no.
01:05:17Stay with me.
01:05:18Oh, my God.
01:05:20I can't save you.
01:05:21I don't have my powers.
01:05:24Why didn't you run?
01:05:26You could have saved yourself.
01:05:28Oh, my God.
01:05:29I've been saving myself my whole life.
01:05:32I thought I'd try something new.
01:05:36You idiot, you stupid, stupid idiot.
01:05:40Yeah.
01:05:42But I'm your idiot.
01:05:50You took a divorce spell.
01:05:53I had a promise.
01:05:55Now you're free.
01:05:57Yeah.
01:05:59I don't want to be free.
01:06:03I don't want to be free.
01:06:05I don't want to be with you.
01:06:07Just keep secrets safe.
01:06:10Safe from my father.
01:06:12Safe from all of it.
01:06:15You know, those days in Vegas were the best three days of my life.
01:06:22All right, let's get this show started, okay?
01:06:27I love you.
01:06:30I love you, too.
01:06:32I love you.
01:06:33I love you.
01:06:35I love you.
01:06:39I love you.
01:07:00The Wand of Light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires.
01:07:10Please, please, please.
01:07:21Eric, please.
01:07:37You absolute moron.
01:07:42You absolute moron.
01:07:45Be gentle. I was dead for like ten seconds.
01:07:49You're alive.
01:07:51That is for divorcing me on your literal deathbed, you asshole.
01:07:56I thought I was doing something noble, something cool.
01:07:59The Wand gave you your power back?
01:08:03My mom used to say that the Wand's user grants it its deepest desire.
01:08:08I guess it knew what I really wanted.
01:08:11What did you want?
01:08:14You.
01:08:17Don't scare me like that again, okay?
01:08:20You know, I thought I heard something, but I was bleeding out.
01:08:29Maybe you could say it again?
01:08:35Maybe you could say it again?
01:08:39I love you, Eric's Vincent.
01:08:43That's my girl.
01:09:03You ready for one last stop?
01:09:07Yeah.
01:09:27Ah, there you are.
01:09:30I knew I could always trust a demon to get the job done.
01:09:35Now, where is my wand?
01:09:38Wait.
01:09:39You're supposed to be dead.
01:09:41Wow.
01:09:42You weren't kidding.
01:09:43He really is evil.
01:09:45I put a barrier around this whole house.
01:09:48It's impossible.
01:09:48There's no way you should be able to be in here.
01:09:50There's always a loophole, old man.
01:09:55Secret.
01:09:56You ungrateful brat.
01:09:58How dare you betray me like this?
01:10:00Really, Dad?
01:10:01Playing the family card after you almost sold me into child marriage?
01:10:05You ungrateful little pests!
01:10:15You're powerless now, old man.
01:10:17Your magic's gone.
01:10:18Forever.
01:10:31Eric!
01:10:32Otis!
01:10:33Svensson!
01:10:34Release me this instant!
01:10:36That is an order!
01:10:39You can handle it from here, right?
01:10:41His powers are gone.
01:10:43It doesn't scare me anymore.
01:10:46You are grateful little brats.
01:10:48Both of you will pay for this!
01:10:49You will both pay for this!
01:10:55Yeah, yeah.
01:10:56Talk soon, pups.
01:10:58We're gonna hit the road.
01:10:59I said get back here.
01:11:00I said get back here!
01:11:02Get back here!
01:11:03Please don't do this, you little b-
01:11:06No!
01:11:08No!
01:11:10No.
01:11:16Okay.
01:11:21So, where to now?
01:11:24Should we go and drop off the Wand of Life?
01:11:27Yeah.
01:11:29But there's something I want to do first.
01:11:32that sounds ominous
01:11:35just so happens that
01:11:36there's another full moon tonight
01:11:39Leona Sherwood
01:11:41are you asking me
01:11:42to hand fast marry you
01:11:45yeah
01:11:47I think I am
01:11:48Eric Spencer
01:11:50well we better hurry
01:11:51if we're going to take the wand of light home
01:11:53and make it back in time to the hunk-a-hunk-a wedding chapel of love
01:11:57I wonder if they have the same office
01:11:59I sure hope so
01:12:01but if we're going to get hand fast married again
01:12:03no more secrets this time
01:12:06so is there anything you want to come clean about now
01:12:09soon to be again husband
01:12:13there is one thing
01:12:16you might want to buckle up
01:12:18we're about to go super speed
01:12:21Bessie could have been going super speed this entire time
01:12:24you didn't tell me to make our trip last longer
01:12:26didn't you
01:12:27you know me so well
01:12:29soon to be again wife
01:12:33Leona Sherwood
01:12:35will you marry me
01:12:36and not because of some spell
01:12:38or because it's your duty
01:12:41but because you want to
01:12:45yes I will
01:12:57ready
01:12:58hell yeah
01:12:59hell yeah
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