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Emma spent thirteen years caring for Brian after rescuing him from the Beast Trade, believing their bond meant something. Then one conversation shattered everything she thought she knew.
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Emma spent thirteen years caring for Brian after rescuing him from the Beast Trade, believing their bond meant something. Then one conversation shattered everything she thought she knew.
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00:03Brian and Logan were twin wolf beast kin that my cousin Isabella and I rescued from the
00:08underground beast trade back then the two of us stood there staring at those filthy little wolf
00:13pups and without even needing to say much we each decided to adopt one I took Brian Isabella took
00:19Logan 13 years passed in the blink of an eye all that time I believe that even if Brian didn't
00:25like
00:25me he would at least feel grateful that I had saved his life that illusion shattered the day
00:30I accidentally overheard him talking to some other beast kin someone asked Emma's been really good to
00:38you why are you always so cold to her who asked her to be good to me you've got it
00:44good and don't even
00:46realize it good then I guess I should thank Emma properly if she hadn't taken me first me'd be the
00:51one with Isabella right now I mean makes sense compared to Isabella the head cheerleader Emma's
00:56just nothing special a dull ache spread through my chest every feeling I had held on to for Brian
01:02over the years quietly disappeared when I got home I sat on the living room couch until well past
01:07midnight again and again I picked up a mirror staring at the girl reflected in it I had always
01:13thought I looked average but now the longer I looked the worse it seemed with a surge of disgust
01:18I tossed the mirror aside all I could see in my mind was Isabella's radiant effortless smile
01:23I lowered my head and let the weight of my own insecurity swallow me home the sound of the front
01:27door opening broke the silence Brian walked in reeking of bourbon barely sparing me a glance before
01:33turning toward his bedroom I wiped my tears with the back of my hand and stood up for the first
01:37time I
01:37reached out trying to grab his tail my hand was immediately slapped away he stepped back his face full
01:43of irritation don't touch me it was exactly the same reaction as the first time I had tried to touch
01:48his wolf ears even after I had taken him in and cared for him with everything I had for 13
01:53years
01:54a bitter laugh slipped out of me so if you're not pretty even your sincerity isn't worth anyone taking
01:59seriously I didn't even notice when my tears began to fall one by one onto the hardwood floor by the
02:05time
02:05I looked up again I was alone in the living room my thoughts drifted as they always did back to
02:10high
02:10school and the annual fall homecoming carnival I used to bring a big box of Texas's barbecue
02:15and find Brian in the backyard Brian will you come to the carnival with me this year he'd lift his
02:21head
02:21out of the pool water dripping from his hair no but a lot of people bring their bee skin with
02:27them
02:27no if you want someone to go with you go adopt another one from the shelter so every year I
02:34went
02:34alone I would stand off to the side watching Logan who had the exact same face as Brian
02:39yet always wore the gentlest smile he would ruffle Isabella's hair and ask
02:44Isabella do you want that teddy bear
02:47she'd nod with a bright smile rising onto her toes to reach for his wolf ears
02:51and Logan would always bend down for her patient and indulgent
02:55I watched him like a thief quietly craving the life Isabella had
02:59but one time Jason a few of his buddies shoved me onto the grass
03:02his voice was dripping with mockery well look who it is Emma a straight day nerd where's your
03:08little bee skin didn't feel like coming out with you one of his friends snickered her bee skin and
03:14Isabella's are twin wolves right the older one ended up with the prom queen and the younger one got stuck
03:19with an ugly duckling I refused to back down gritting my teeth I pushed myself up and swung my fist
03:25straight at his friend's face he went down hard before he could even react Chase lunged at me trying to
03:30fight back but I slammed him to the ground and kept hitting him until someone finally pulled me off
03:34the end result was predictable all of us were called into the principal's office
03:38I thought my mom would be on my side instead right in front of the principal and Chase
03:42she sighed in annoyance honestly what were you thinking they weren't even wrong
03:46why would you hit someone over that I tugged lightly at the sleeve of her coat
03:49mom I said barely above a whisper she acted like she didn't hear me let's be real she went on
03:54you're not exactly pretty and now you've got this terrible temper too
03:57even the bee skin you raised doesn't care about you I don't know how I ended up with a daughter
04:01like you sometimes I wish Isabella were my child instead that night I cried my eyes out in Central
04:06Park when I finally went home my father greeted me with a sharp slap across the face he said
04:12I closed my eyes and fell into a heavy sleep my messed up schedule left my mind blank when I
04:18woke up again
04:18when I pushed the door open I realized it was already dusk Brian was out but his presence lingered
04:23everywhere in the apartment I grabbed a slice of pizza and forced myself to eat then started packing
04:28up everything that belonged to me there wasn't much really after I got into college at 18 I was
04:33afraid my parents would treat Brian badly so I took him with me at my poorest I could only afford
04:39a
04:39run-down studio apartment he slept on the bed and I took the couch Brian was well over six feet
04:44tall
04:44and he would bump his head every time he walked through the low doorway so I worked non-stop picking
04:48up
04:49every part-time job I could find until I finally saved enough for a down payment on a small two
04:54bedroom townhouse love has a way of making you feel like you owe everything so I bought Brian more
04:58things than he could ever need I never once considered that he didn't want any of it this
05:02time I decided to give him what he actually wanted freedom after I finished packing I walked out of the
05:07home Brian and I had shared the next morning when the staff at the Bureau of Non-Human Affairs asked
05:12me
05:12for the third time if I was sure I wanted to terminate my bond with Brian I still nodded when
05:16a human
05:17dissolves a bond unilaterally financial compensation is required I left the townhouse to him at the
05:22office Emily handed me the bond termination certificate then hesitated before asking Miss
05:27Emma would you like to give this to Mr. Brian in person or should we mail it on your behalf
05:30I took
05:31out the letter I had rewritten over and over again the night before please mail it to him I said
05:35and
05:35include this there were only two sentences in the letter I am sorry Brian I took you away without your
05:41consent so this time I am giving your freedom back to you I walked out of City Hall got into
05:46my car
05:46and left Los Angeles behind my new life would begin in Florida somewhere by the ocean waiting
05:51for warmer days ahead since my new job was as a lecturer at a university in Miami I rented a
05:56small
05:56beach house with a yard the evening sea breeze carried a faint salty smell as I walked along the
06:01shore wearing a mask the orange glow of the sunset was just right soft and beautiful I took a photo
06:06then out of habit opened my iMessage chat with Brian scrolling up it was nothing but messages from me
06:10photos of little trinkets I found at vintage markets strange shaped clouds in the sky the slow growth of a
06:15sunflower he rarely replied most of the time all I ever got back was a short dismissive yeah the last
06:22message in our chat was from the day I heard the truth I had asked him where are you I
06:26can come pick
06:27you up he never replied by then he must have already received the bond termination certificate and still
06:32he could not even bring himself to say goodbye all that was left in my chest was a dull spreading
06:37ache
06:37after thinking it over I realized my new life should not be tied to the past so I changed my
06:42phone
06:42number deleted my old Instagram and created a new account I packed my schedule as full as possible
06:47just to earn a few nights of uninterrupted sleep some of the more outgoing college girls like to
06:52chat with me between classes professor Emma why do you always wear a mask on campus because I'm not
06:57very pretty who said that oh my god I swear I will shut them up there is no such thing
07:02as an ugly girl
07:03she sounded completely sincere and the others around her nodded in agreement just as indignant I would
07:08laugh it off and smoothly change the subject soon enough they started talking about the beeskin they
07:13had at home then they asked me professor what kind of beeskin do you have I did not know how
07:17to explain
07:17everything that had happened with Brian so I gave them a simple answer he died they fell silent for a
07:22long moment until the bell rang and class began after that during my two weekly lectures students would
07:27often bring me little things a Starbucks latte a blueberry muffin or a bar of Hershey's chocolate I could
07:32never finish it all that was when I started thinking about the little fox beeskin on campus who survived by
07:38collecting recyclables beeskin were usually striking in appearance and fox beeskin were among the most
07:43beautiful of all but this one had deep crisscrossing scars covering both sides of his face he was afraid
07:48of scaring the students so he only came out late at night that evening when I left the lab and
07:53went
07:53looking for him it started pouring out of nowhere a figure darted toward me a fluffy fox tail swaying
07:58behind him I called out softly hey little fox huh the young beeskin turned around and noticed me
08:04immediately lowering his head he quickly covered his face with his hands I'm sorry ma'am I must have
08:09misheard please don't mind me the autumn rain carried a sharp chill he was soaked through water
08:14dripping steadily from his clothes I looked at him and said gently you don't have to hide your face
08:18I've seen you around I have hot water and a dryer in my office come upstairs and get warmed up
08:23he
08:23hesitated then slowly lowered his hands and nodded thank you ma'am once we got into my office under the
08:28bright lights I realized how young he was around 18 or 19 about the same age as my freshman while
08:34he
08:34was showering I went next door to the lab to ask about him my colleague Arthur was always eager to
08:39talk and he filled me in without hesitation that little fox is named Finn I heard he used to be
08:45incredibly good looking his former handler tried to sell him to the red light district in the underground
08:49beast trade he refused and even bit someone before escaping during the escape his face got slashed up when
08:55the people from the black market saw he was disfigured they beat him badly and threw him
08:59into the ocean lucky for him the university rowing team pulled him out since then he's been scraping by
09:04on campus selecting recyclables I asked where does he live there's a rundown shed behind the hill on
09:10campus Arthur frowned slightly Emma I heard your beastkin passed away you're not thinking about
09:14adopting him are you I bit down on the straw of my hot latte and didn't answer Arthur's voice suddenly
09:19sharpened he looks like that who would want to adopt him his words overlapped with the voices from my
09:24past she looks so plain who would ever like her but why we have hearts too we want to love
09:28and be
09:29loved just the same I looked at Arthur and said quietly he isn't ugly he's just been hurt and he's
09:34kind he's sweet I've seen him share the food he collects with homeless people nearby I've seen him
09:39donate his spare change to the beastkin protection agency so please don't say things like that about
09:44him again when I stepped out of Arthur's office I saw Finn standing in the hallway his blonde hair and
09:49tail were still damp his eyes were brimming with tears feeling a little awkward I changed the subject
09:53if it's hard to do it yourself I can help dry it I took the towel and gently dried his
09:58hair and tail
09:58then used a hair dryer to finish the job it was my first time drying a beastkin's tail and I
10:03was clumsy
10:03I accidentally hurt him more than once and kept apologizing Finn's face turned red it's okay I'm
10:09already very grateful to you when I finally finished I handed him a muffin and the latte he didn't take
10:14them
10:14after a long pause as if gathering all his courage he spoke again ma'am I don't eat much could
10:20you
10:20adopt me my hand froze mid-air Finn continued I know I'm not good looking but I can cook wash
10:26dishes
10:26mow the lawn I can get massages and I know how to grow roses I smiled then took off my
10:31mask and met
10:31his eyes but I'm not good looking either would you still choose me Finn gently reached out and touched
10:36my cheek his movements careful almost reverent you're very cute he said softly I want to go with
10:43you my eyes stung I blinked quickly holding back the tears and took his hand as we walked out of
10:48the
10:48lab building together the rain had stopped and just like that I chose a family for myself I completed
10:53the paperwork and adopted Finn just like he promised he did everything beautifully he kept the beach house
10:59spotless filled the yard with blooming hydrangeas and brought me hot home-cooked lunches at the lab
11:03running those spectral analyses today nearly killed me Arthur said as he wandered in from next door
11:08shamelessly helping himself he took a big spoonful of beef stew and let out a low whistle
11:13damn Finn can cook this is incredible meanwhile the one at my place does nothing but curl up on the
11:18couch and watch Netflix honestly Arthur should have been grateful Brianne could not cook at all
11:23then again maybe he just never bothered to do anything like that for me that night I had the
11:28nightmare again a memory buried deep in my mind I was 17 Isabella and Logan went with me and Brian
11:35to
11:35Universal Studios Orlando halfway through the day the park was hit by a sudden indiscriminate attack
11:40explosions erupted from every direction Logan shielded Isabella while I grabbed Brianne's hand
11:46and ran for the exit we were near the eastern side of the park but the flying debris still cut
11:51into
11:51everyone we were only steps away from the exit when it was blown apart right in front of us at
11:56the time
11:57I had been running ahead and never noticed what happened in that instant but in the dream I saw it
12:02clearly both Logan and Brian threw themselves toward Isabella without hesitation I was left alone collapsing into
12:08rubble and dust with no one caring whether I lived or died Logan and Brianne were only relieved that
12:13Isabella was safe later I lay unconscious in the ICU for days my parents and Brianne stayed by Isabella's
12:19side comforting her as she cried from the shock a voice echoed in my mind mocking me Emma C no
12:25one in
12:26this world loves you it came from everywhere repeating itself over and over surrounding me until I could not
12:32escape it in the dream my soul seemed to float above crouch down clutching my head as I tried to
12:37argue
12:37back that's not true that's not true then faintly someone grabbed my hand and pulled me forward a voice
12:45said Emma that's not true everyone deserves to be loved I woke with a start the first thing I saw
12:51was
12:51Finn sitting at my bedside wiping the cold sweat from my forehead his face tight with worry when he saw
12:57my
12:57eyes open he finally let out a breath tears slipped down my face before I could stop them Finn can
13:02you
13:02hold me he climbed onto the bed and pull me into his arms I clung to him like a child
13:07pouring out
13:07everything I had been holding inside Finn gently patted my back murmuring soft reassurances I did not
13:13have to worry about him snapping at me to leave him alone I did not have to worry about him
13:17brushing me
13:17off and disappearing into distractions and I definitely did not have to worry about him looking at me with
13:22cold indifference I want to hear a song I whispered Finn hummed softly you are my sunshine my only
13:28sunshine you make me happy when skies are gray with Finn taking care of me I started getting better
13:33little by little the sunlight was especially bright today Finn and I were in the backyard
13:38hanging sheets out to dry we ended up laughing and playing around on either side of the fabric
13:43the breeze lifting it between us then someone called my name from beyond the fence Emma I turned around
13:49Brian was standing there the hanger slipped from my hand and fell straight onto the grass Finn noticed
13:54the shift in my expression immediately and stepped in front of me without hesitation I tugged lightly
13:59on the hem of Finn's flannel shirt it's okay I know him go take care of the blue crabs in
14:04the kitchen
14:04I just need a minute to talk to him we walked over to a wooden bench by the shore the
14:08ocean breeze
14:09tangled my hair I forced a small awkward smile it's been a while Brian he stared at me his voice
14:14cold
14:15who is that fox my new fostered bee skin he
14:30Brian and Logan were twin wolf beast kin that my cousin Isabella and I rescued from the underground
14:36beast trade back then the two of us stood there staring at those filthy little wolf pups
14:41and without even needing to say much we each decided to adopt one I took Brian Isabella took Logan 13
14:48years
14:48past in the blink of an eye all that time I believe that even if Brian didn't like me he
14:54would at
14:54least feel grateful that I had saved his life that illusion shattered the day I accidentally overheard
14:59him talking to some other beast kin someone asked Emma's been really good to you why are you always so
15:07cold to her who asked her to be good to me you've got it good and don't even realize it
15:15good then I guess I
15:16should thank Emma properly if she hadn't taken me first me'd be the one with Isabella right now I mean
15:20makes sense compared to Isabella the head cheerleader Emma's just nothing special a dull ache spread through
15:26my chest every feeling I had held on to for Brian over the years quietly disappeared when I got home
15:32I sat
15:33on the living room couch until well past midnight again and again I picked up a mirror staring at the
15:39girl
15:39reflected in it I had always thought I looked average but now the longer I looked the worse it seemed
15:44with a surge of
15:45disgust I tossed the mirror aside all I could see in my mind was Isabella's radiant effortless smile
15:51I lowered my head and let the weight of my own insecurity swallow me home the sound of the front
15:55door opening broke the silence Brian walked in reeking of bourbon barely sparing me a glance before
16:01turning toward his bedroom I wiped my tears with the back of my hand and stood up for the first
16:05time I
16:05reached out trying to grab his tail my hand was immediately slapped away he stepped back his face full of
16:11irritation don't touch me it was exactly the same reaction as the first time I had tried to touch his
16:16wolf ears even after I had taken him in and cared for him with everything I had for 13 years
16:21a bitter
16:22laugh slipped out of me so if you're not pretty even your sincerity isn't worth anyone taking seriously
16:27I didn't even notice when my tears began to fall one by one onto the hardwood floor by the time
16:33I looked
16:33up again I was alone in the living room my thoughts drifted as they always did back to high school
16:38and the
16:39annual fall homecoming carnival I used to bring a big box of Texas's barbecue and find Brian in the
16:45backyard Brian will you come to the carnival with me this year he'd lift his head out of the pool
16:50water dripping from his hair no but a lot of people bring their bee skin with them no if you
16:57want
16:57someone to go with you go adopt another one from the shelter so every year I went alone I would
17:03stand
17:03off to the side watching Logan who had the exact same face as Brian yet always wore the gentlest smile
17:09he would ruffle Isabella's hair and ask Isabella do you want that teddy bear she'd nod with a bright
17:16smile rising onto her toes to reach for his wolf ears and Logan would always bend down for her
17:21patient and indulgent I watched him like a thief quietly craving the life Isabella had but one time
17:27Jason a few of his buddies shoved me onto the grass his voice was dripping with mockery
17:32well look who it is Emma a straight a nerd where's your little bee skin didn't feel like coming out
17:38with you one of his friends snickered her bee skin and Isabella's are twin wolves right the older one
17:44ended up with the prom queen and the younger one got stuck with an ugly duckling I refused to back
17:49down gritting my teeth I pushed myself up and swung my fist straight at his friend's face he went down
17:54hard before he could even react Chase lunged at me trying to fight back but I slammed him to the
17:59ground and kept hitting him until someone finally pulled me off the end result was predictable all
18:04of us were called into the principal's office I thought my mom would be on my side instead right
18:08in front of the principal and Chase she sighed in annoyance honestly what were you thinking they
18:13weren't even wrong why would you hit someone over that I tugged lightly at the sleeve of her coat
18:17mom I said barely above a whisper she acted like she didn't hear me let's be real she went on
18:22you're
18:22not exactly pretty and now you've got this terrible temper too even the beast can you raise doesn't care
18:27about you I don't know how I ended up with a daughter like you sometimes I wish Isabella were
18:31my child instead that night I cried my eyes out in Central Park when I finally went home my father
18:35greeted me with a sharp slap across the face he said I closed my eyes and fell into a heavy
18:43sleep
18:43my messed up schedule left my mind blank when I woke up again when I pushed the door open I
18:48realized it
18:48was already dusk Brian was out but his presence lingered everywhere in the apartment I grabbed a slice of
18:54pizza and forced myself to eat then started packing up everything that belonged to me there wasn't much
18:58really after I got into college at 18 I was afraid my parents would treat Brian badly so I took
19:03him
19:03with me at my poorest I could only afford a run-down studio apartment he slept on the bed and
19:09I took the
19:10couch Brian was well over six feet tall and he would bump his head every time he walked through the
19:14low
19:14doorway so I worked non-stop picking up every part-time job I could find until I finally saved enough
19:20for a
19:20down payment on a small two-bedroom townhouse love has a way of making you feel like you owe
19:24everything so I bought Brian more things than he could ever need I never once considered that he
19:29didn't want any of it this time I decided to give him what he actually wanted freedom after I finished
19:34packing I walked out of the home Brian and I had shared the next morning when the staff at the
19:38bureau
19:38of non-human affairs asked me for the third time if I was sure I wanted to terminate my bond
19:42with
19:43Brian I still nodded when a human dissolves a bond unilaterally financial compensation is required
19:48I left the townhouse to him at the office Emily handed me the bond termination certificate then
19:53hesitated before asking Miss Emma would you like to give this to Mr. Brian in person or should we mail
19:58it on your behalf I took out the letter I had rewritten over and over again the night before
20:01please mail it to him I said and include this there were only two sentences in the letter I am
20:07sorry
20:07Brian I took you away without your consent so this time I am giving your freedom back to you I
20:12walked out
20:12of City Hall got into my car and left Los Angeles behind my new life would begin in Florida
20:17somewhere by the ocean waiting for warmer days ahead since my new job was as a lecturer at a
20:22university in Miami I rented a small beach house with a yard the evening sea breeze carried a faint
20:27salty smell as I walked along the shore wearing a mask the orange glow of the sunset was just right
20:32soft and beautiful I took a photo then out of habit opened my iMessage chat with Brian scrolling up
20:37it was nothing but messages from me photos of little trinkets I found at vintage markets strange
20:41shaped clouds in the sky the slow growth of a sunflower he rarely replied most of the time all I
20:47ever got
20:47back was a short dismissive yeah the last message in our chat was from the day I heard the truth
20:52I
20:52had asked him where are you I can come pick you up he never replied by then he must have
20:57already
20:57received the bond termination certificate and still he could not even bring himself to say goodbye all
21:02that was left in my chest was a dull spreading ache after thinking it over I realized my new life
21:07should
21:08not be tied to the past so I changed my phone number deleted my old Instagram and created a new
21:12account I packed my schedule as full as possible just to earn a few nights of uninterrupted sleep
21:17some of the more outgoing college girls like to chat with me between classes professor Emma why do
21:22you always wear a mask on campus because I'm not very pretty who said that oh my god I swear
21:27I will
21:28shut them up there is no such thing as an ugly girl she sounded completely sincere and the others
21:33around her nodded in agreement just as indignant I would laugh it off and smoothly change the subject
21:38soon enough they started talking about the bee skin they had at home then they asked me professor
21:42what kind of bee skin do you have I did not know how to explain everything that had happened with
21:46Brian so I gave them a simple answer he died they fell silent for a long moment until the bell
21:51rang
21:51and class began after that during my two weekly lectures students would often bring me little
21:56things a Starbucks latte a blueberry muffin or a bar of Hershey's chocolate I could never finish it all
22:01that was when I started thinking about the little fox bee skin on campus who survived by collecting
22:06recyclables bee skin were usually striking in appearance and fox bee skin were among the most
22:10beautiful of all but this one had deep crisscrossing scars covering both sides of his face he was afraid
22:16of scaring the students so he only came out late at night that evening when I left the lab and
22:20went
22:20looking for him it started pouring out of nowhere a figure darted toward me a fluffy foxtail swaying
22:26behind him I called out softly hey little fox huh the young bee skin turned around and noticed me
22:32immediately lowering his head he quickly covered his face with his hands I'm sorry ma'am I must
22:37have misheard please don't mind me the autumn rain carried a sharp chill he was soaked through water
22:41dripping steadily from his clothes I looked at him and said gently you don't have to hide your face
22:46I've seen you around I have hot water and a dryer in my office come upstairs and get warmed up
22:51he
22:51hesitated then slowly lowered his hands and nodded thank you ma'am once we got into my office under the
22:56bright lights I realized how young he was around 18 or 19 about the same age as my freshman while
23:02he
23:02was showering I went next door to the lab to ask about him my colleague Arthur was always eager to
23:07talk and he filled me in without hesitation that little fox is named Finn I heard he used to be
23:12incredibly good looking his former handler tried to sell him to the red light district in the underground
23:17beast trade he refused and even bit someone before escaping during the escape his face got slashed up when
23:23the people from the black market saw he was disfigured they beat him badly and threw him
23:27into the ocean lucky for him the university rowing team pulled him out since then he's been scraping by
23:32on campus selecting recyclables I asked where does he live there's a rundown shed behind the hill on
23:37campus Arthur frowned slightly Emma I heard your beastkin passed away you're not thinking about
23:42adopting him are you I bit down on the straw of my hot latte and didn't answer Arto's voice suddenly
23:47sharpened he looks like that who would want to adopt him his words overlapped with the voices from my
23:51past she looks so plain who would ever like her but why we have hearts too we want to love
23:56and be
23:57loved just the same I looked at Arthur and said quietly he isn't ugly he's just been hurt and
24:02he's kind he's sweet I've seen him share the food he collects with homeless people nearby I've seen him
24:07donate his spare change to the beastkin protection agency so please don't say things like that about him
24:12again when I stepped out of Arthur's office I saw Finn standing in the hallway his blonde hair and tail
24:17were
24:17still damp his eyes were brimming with tears feeling a little awkward I changed the subject
24:21if it's hard to do it yourself I can help dry it I took the towel and gently dried his
24:25hair and tail
24:26then used a hair dryer to finish the job it was my first time drying a beastkin's tail and I
24:31was clumsy
24:31I accidentally hurt him more than once and kept apologizing Finn's face turned red it's okay I'm
24:37already very grateful to you when I finally finished I handed him a muffin and the latte he didn't take
24:42them after a long pause as if gathering all his courage he spoke again ma'am I don't eat much
24:47could
24:48you adopt me my hand froze mid-air Finn continued I know I'm not good-looking but I can cook
24:53wash
24:54dishes mow the lawn I can get massages and I know how to grow roses I smiled then took off
24:58my mask and
24:59met his eyes but I'm not good-looking either would you still choose me Finn gently reached out and touched
25:04my cheek his movements careful almost reverent you're very cute he said softly I want to go with
25:11you my eyes stung I blinked quickly holding back the tears and took his hand as we walked out of
25:16the lab building together the rain had stopped and just like that I chose a family for myself
25:20I completed the paperwork and adopted Finn just like he promised he did everything beautifully he kept the
25:26beach house spotless filled the yard with blooming hydrangeas and brought me hot home-cooked lunches at
25:31the lab running those spectral analyses today nearly killed me Arthur said as he wandered in from next
25:36door shamelessly helping himself he took a big spoonful of beef stew and let out a low whistle
25:41damn Finn can cook this is incredible meanwhile the one at my place does nothing but curl up on the
25:46couch
25:46and watch Netflix honestly Arthur should have been grateful Brianne could not cook at all then again
25:51maybe he just never bothered to do anything like that for me that night I had the nightmare again
25:57a memory buried deep in my mind I was 17 Isabella and Logan went with me and Brian to Universal
26:03Studios
26:04Orlando halfway through the day the park was hit by a sudden indiscriminate attack explosions erupted
26:09from every direction Logan shielded Isabella while I grabbed Brian's hand and ran for the exit we were
26:15near the eastern side of the park but the flying debris still cut into everyone we were only steps away
26:21from the exit when it was blown apart right in front of us at the time I had been running
26:25ahead and never
26:26notice what happened in that instant but in the dream I saw it clearly both Logan and Brian threw
26:31themselves toward Isabella without hesitation I was left alone collapsing into rubble and dust with no one
26:37caring whether I lived or died Logan and Brian were only relieved that Isabella was safe later I lay
26:43unconscious in the ICU for days my parents and Brian stayed by Isabella's side comforting her as she cried from
26:49the shock
26:50a voice echoed in my mind mocking me Emma C no one in this world loves you it came from
26:55everywhere repeating
26:57itself over and over surrounding me until I could not escape it in the dream my soul seemed to float
27:02above crouched down clutching my head as I tried to argue back that's not true that's not true then
27:08faintly someone grabbed my hand and pulled me forward a voice said Emma that's not true everyone deserves to
27:16be loved I woke with a start the first thing I saw was Finn sitting at my bedside wiping the
27:21cold sweat
27:21from my forehead his face tight with worry when he saw my eyes open he finally let out a breath
27:27tears
27:27slipped down my face before I could stop them Finn can you hold me he climbed onto the bed and
27:32pull me
27:33into his arms I clung to him like a child pouring out everything I had been holding inside Finn gently
27:38patted my back murmuring soft reassurances I did not have to worry about him snapping at me to leave him
27:43alone I did not have to worry about him brushing me off and disappearing into distractions and I
27:47definitely did not have to worry about him looking at me with cold indifference I want to hear a song
27:52I whispered Finn hummed softly you are my sunshine my only sunshine you make me happy when skies are
27:58gray with Finn taking care of me I started getting better little by little the sunlight was especially
28:04bright today Finn and I were in the backyard hanging sheets out to dry we ended up laughing and playing
28:09around on either side of the fabric the breeze lifting it between us then someone called my
28:14name from beyond the fence Emma I turned around Brian was standing there the hanger slipped from
28:19my hand and fell straight onto the grass Finn noticed the shift in my expression immediately and
28:24stepped in front of me without hesitation I tugged lightly on the hem of Finn's flannel shirt it's okay
28:29I know him go take care of the blue crabs in the kitchen I just need a minute to talk
28:33to him we walked
28:34over to a wooden bench by the shore the ocean breeze tangled my hair I forced a small awkward smile
28:39it's been a while Brian he stared at me his voice cold who is that fox my new fostered bee
28:45skin
28:58Brian and Logan were twin wolf beast kin that my cousin Isabella and I rescued from the underground
29:04beast trade back then the two of us stood there staring at those filthy little wolf pups and without
29:10even needing to say much we each decided to adopt one I took Brian Isabella took Logan 13 years passed
29:16in the blink of an eye all that time I believe that even if Brian didn't like me he would
29:21at least feel
29:22grateful that I had saved his life that illusion shattered the day I accidentally overheard him
29:28talking to some other beast kin someone asked Emma's been really good to you why are you always so
29:35cold to her who asked her to be good to me you've got it good and don't even realize it
29:42good then I
29:43guess I should thank Emma properly if she hadn't taken me first me'd be the one with Isabella right
29:47now I mean makes sense compared to Isabella the head cheerleader Emma's just nothing special a dull
29:53ache spread through my chest every feeling I had held on to for Brian over the years quietly disappeared
29:59when I got home I sat on the living room couch until well past midnight again and again I picked
30:05up a mirror staring at the girl reflected in it I had always thought I looked average but now the
30:10longer I looked the worse it seemed with a surge of disgust I tossed the mirror aside all I could
30:16see in
30:16my mind was Isabella's radiant effortless smile I lowered my head and let the weight of my own
30:20insecurity swallow me home the sound of the front door opening broke the silence Brian walked in
30:25reeking of bourbon barely sparing me a glance before turning toward his bedroom I wiped my tears
30:30with the back of my hand and stood up for the first time I reached out trying to grab his
30:34tail my hand
30:35was immediately slapped away he stepped back his face full of irritation don't touch me it was exactly
30:41the same reaction as the first time I had tried to touch his wolf ears even after I had taken
30:46him in
30:46and cared for him with everything I had for 13 years a bitter laugh slipped out of me so if
30:52you're not
30:52pretty even your sincerity isn't worth anyone taking seriously I didn't even notice when my tears
30:57began to fall one by one onto the hardwood floor by the time I looked up again I was alone
31:03in the
31:03living room my thoughts drifted as they always did back to high school and the annual fall homecoming
31:08carnival I used to bring a big box of Texas's barbecue and find Brian in the backyard Brian will
31:14you come to the carnival with me this year he'd lift his head out of the pool water dripping from
31:19his
31:19hair no but a lot of people bring their bee skin with them no if you want someone to go
31:25with you
31:26go adopt another one from the shelter so every year I went alone I would stand off to the side
31:32watching Logan who had the exact same face as Brian yet always wore the gentlest smile he would
31:38ruffle Isabella's hair and ask Isabella do you want that teddy bear she'd nod with a bright smile
31:44rising onto her toes to reach for his wolf ears and Logan would always bend down for her patient and
31:50indulgent I watched him like a thief quietly craving the life Isabella had but one time
31:55Jason a few of his buddies shoved me onto the grass his voice was dripping with mockery well look who
32:01it
32:01is Emma a straight day nerd where's your little bee skin didn't feel like coming out with you one of
32:07his friends snickered her bee skin and Isabella's are twin wolves right the older one ended up with
32:12the prom queen and the younger one got stuck with an ugly duckling I refused to back down gritting my
32:18teeth I pushed myself up and swung my fist straight at his friend's face he went down hard before he
32:23could even react Chase lunged at me trying to fight back but I slammed him to the ground and kept
32:28hitting
32:28him until someone finally pulled me off the end result was predictable all of us were called into the
32:33principal's office I thought my mom would be on my side instead right in front of the principal and
32:37Chase she sighed in annoyance honestly what were you thinking they weren't even wrong why would you
32:42hit someone over that I tugged lightly at the sleeve of her coat mom I said barely above a whisper
32:47she
32:47acted like she didn't hear me let's be real she went on you're not exactly pretty and now you've got
32:51this terrible temper too even the bee skin you raise doesn't care about you I don't know how I ended
32:56up
32:56with a daughter like you sometimes I wish Isabella were my child instead that night I cried my eyes out
33:01in
33:01central part when I finally went home my father greeted me with a sharp slap across the face
33:07he said I closed my eyes and fell into a heavy sleep my messed up schedule left my mind blank
33:13when
33:13I woke up again when I pushed the door open I realized it was already dusk Brian was out but
33:18his
33:18presence lingered everywhere in the apartment I grabbed a slice of pizza and forced myself to eat
33:23then started packing up everything that belonged to me there wasn't much really after I got into college
33:27at 18 I was afraid my parents would treat Brian badly so I took him with me at my poorest
33:33I could
33:34only afford a run-down studio apartment he slept on the bed and I took the couch Brian was well
33:39over
33:39six feet tall and he would bump his head every time he walked through the low doorway so I worked
33:43non-stop picking up every part-time job I could find until I finally saved enough for a down payment
33:48on a small two-bedroom townhouse love has a way of making you feel like you owe everything so I
33:53bought
33:53Brian more things than he could ever need I never once considered that he didn't want any of it
33:58this time I decided to give him what he actually wanted freedom after I finished packing I walked
34:02out of the home Brian and I had shared the next morning when the staff at the Bureau of Non
34:06-Human
34:07Affairs asked me for the third time if I was sure I wanted to terminate my bond with Brian I
34:11still
34:11nodded when a human dissolves a bond unilaterally financial compensation is required I left the townhouse
34:17to him at the office Emily handed me the bond termination certificate then hesitated before asking
34:22Miss Emma would you like to give this to Mr. Brian in person or should we mail it on your
34:26behalf
34:26I took out the letter I had rewritten over and over again the night before please mail it to him
34:30I said and include this there were only two sentences in the letter I am sorry Brian I took
34:35you away without your consent so this time I am giving your freedom back to you I walked out of
34:40City Hall got into my car and left Los Angeles behind my new life would begin in Florida somewhere by
34:46the
34:46ocean waiting for warmer days ahead since my new job was as a lecturer at a university in Miami
34:51I rented a small beach house with a yard the evening sea breeze carried a faint salty smell
34:55as I walked along the shore wearing a mask the orange glow of the sunset was just right soft and
35:00beautiful I took a photo then out of habit open my iMessage chat with Brian scrolling up it was nothing
35:05but messages from me photos of little trinkets I found at vintage markets strange shaped clouds in
35:10the sky the slow growth of a sunflower he rarely replied most of the time all I ever got back
35:15was a
35:15short dismissive yeah the last message in our chat was from the day I heard the truth I had asked
35:21him
35:21where are you I can come pick you up he never replied by then he must have already received the
35:26bond
35:26termination certificate and still he could not even bring himself to say goodbye all that was left in
35:31my chest was a dull spreading ache after thinking it over I realized my new life should not be tied
35:36to
35:36the past so I changed my phone number deleted my old Instagram and created a new account I packed my
35:41schedule as full as possible just to earn a few nights of uninterrupted sleep some of the more
35:46outgoing college girls like to chat with me between classes professor Emma why do you always wear a mask
35:51on campus because I'm not very pretty who said that oh my god I swear I will shut them up
35:56there is no
35:57such thing as an ugly girl she sounded completely sincere and the others around her nodded in agreement
36:02just as indignant I would laugh it off and smoothly change the subject soon enough they started talking
36:07about the beast skin they had at home then they asked me professor what kind of beast skin do you
36:11have I did not know how to explain everything that had happened with Brian so I gave them a simple
36:16answer he died they fell silent for a long moment until the bell rang and class began after that during
36:21my two weekly lectures students would often bring me little things a Starbucks latte a blueberry muffin
36:26or a bar of Hershey's chocolate I could never finish it all that was when I started thinking about
36:31the little fox beast skin on campus who survived by collecting recyclables beast skin were usually striking
36:36an appearance and fox beast skin were among the most beautiful of all but this one had deep
36:40crisscrossing scars covering both sides of his face he was afraid of scaring the students so he
36:45only came out late at night that evening when I left the lab and went looking for him it started
36:49pouring
36:50out of nowhere a figure darted toward me a fluffy foxtail swaying behind him I called out softly hey
36:56little fox huh the young beast skin turned around and noticed me immediately lowering his head he
37:01quickly covered his face with his hands I'm sorry ma'am I must have misheard please don't mind me
37:06the autumn rain carried a sharp chill he was soaked through water dripping steadily from his clothes I
37:11looked at him and said gently you don't have to hide your face I've seen you around I have hot
37:15water
37:16and a dryer in my office come upstairs and get warmed up he hesitated then slowly lowered his hands
37:21and nodded thank you ma'am once we got into my office under the bright lights I realized how young
37:26he was around 18 or 19 about the same age as my freshman while he was showering I went next
37:31door
37:31to the lab to ask about him my colleague Arthur was always eager to talk and he filled me in
37:36without
37:37hesitation that little fox is named Finn I heard he used to be incredibly good looking his former
37:42handler tried to sell him to the red light district in the underground beast trade he refused and even
37:47bit someone before escaping during the escape his face got slashed up when the people from the black
37:51market saw he was disfigured they beat him badly and threw him into the ocean lucky for him the
37:56university rowing team pulled him out since then he's been scraping by on campus selecting recyclables
38:02I asked where does he live there's a rundown shed behind the hill on campus Arthur frowned slightly
38:07Emma I heard your beast can't pass away you're not thinking about adopting him are you I bit down on
38:11the straw of my hot latte and didn't answer Arto's voice suddenly sharpened he looks like that who would
38:16want to adopt him his words overlapped with the voices from my past she looks so plain who would
38:21never like her but why we have hearts too we want to love and be loved just the same I
38:26looked at
38:26Arthur and said quietly he isn't ugly he's just been hurt and he's kind he's sweet I've seen him
38:32share the food he collects with homeless people nearby I've seen him donate his spare change to the
38:36beastkin protection agency so please don't say things like that about him again when I stepped out
38:41of Arthur's office I saw Finn standing in the hallway his blonde hair and tail were still damp his eyes
38:46were brimming with tears feeling a little awkward I changed the subject if it's hard to do it yourself I
38:51can
38:51help dry it I took the towel and gently dried his hair and tail then used a hairdryer to finish
38:55the
38:56job it was my first time drying a beeskin's tail and I was clumsy I accidentally hurt him more than
39:00once and kept apologizing Finn's face turned red it's okay I'm already very grateful to you when I
39:06finally finished I handed him a muffin and a latte he didn't take them after a long pause as if
39:11gathering
39:11all his courage he spoke again ma'am I don't eat much could you adopt me my hand froze mid
39:18-air Finn
39:19continued I know I'm not good looking but I can cook wash dishes mow the lawn I can get massages
39:24and I know how to grow roses I smiled then took off my mask and met his eyes but I'm
39:28not good looking
39:28either would you still choose me Finn gently reached out and touched my cheek his movements careful
39:33almost reverent you're very cute he said softly I want to go with you my eyes stung I blinked quickly
39:41holding back the tears and took his hand as we walked out of the lab building together the rain had
39:45stopped and just like that I chose a family for myself I completed the paperwork and adopted Finn
39:51just like he promised he did everything beautifully he kept the beach house spotless filled the yard
39:55with blooming hydrangeas and brought me hot home-cooked lunches at the lab running those
40:00spectral analyses today nearly killed me Arthur said as he wandered in from next door shamelessly
40:05helping himself he took a big spoonful of beef stew and let out a low whistle damn Finn can cook
40:10this is incredible meanwhile the one at my place does nothing but curl up on the couch and watch Netflix
40:15honestly Arthur should have been grateful Brianne could not cook at all then again maybe he just never
40:20bothered to do anything like that for me that night I had the nightmare again a memory buried deep
40:26in my mind I was 17 Isabella and Logan went with me and Brian to Universal Studios Orlando
40:32halfway through the day the park was hit by a sudden indiscriminate attack explosions erupted from
40:37every direction Logan shielded Isabella while I grabbed Brian's hand and ran for the exit we were
40:43near the eastern side of the park but the flying debris still cut into everyone we were only steps
40:49away from the exit when it was blown apart right in front of us at the time I had been
40:53running ahead
40:53and never noticed what happened in that instant but in the dream I saw it clearly both Logan and
40:59Brian threw themselves toward Isabella without hesitation I was left alone collapsing into rubble and dust
41:04with no one caring whether I lived or died Logan and Brian were only relieved that Isabella was safe
41:10later I lay unconscious in the ICU for days my parents and Brian stayed by Isabella's side
41:15comforting her as she cried from the shock a voice echoed in my mind mocking me
41:20Emma see no one in this world loves you it came from everywhere repeating itself over and over
41:26surrounding me until I could not escape it in the dream my soul seemed to float above
41:30crouch down clutching my head as I tried to argue back that's not true that's not true then faintly
41:37someone grabbed my hand and pulled me forward a voice said Emma that's not true everyone deserves
41:43to be loved I woke with a start the first thing I saw was Finn sitting at my bedside wiping
41:48the cold
41:49sweat from my forehead his face tight with worry when he saw my eyes open he finally let out a
41:54breath
41:55tears slipped down my face before I could stop them Finn can you hold me he climbed onto the bed
42:00and pull me into his arms I clung to him like a child pouring out everything I had been holding
42:04inside Finn gently patted my back murmuring soft reassurances I did not have to worry about him
42:09snapping at me to leave him alone I did not have to worry about him brushing me off and disappearing
42:14into distractions and I definitely did not have to worry about him looking at me with cold indifference
42:18I want to hear a song I whispered Finn hummed softly you are my sunshine my only sunshine you make
42:25me
42:25happy when skies are gray with Finn taking care of me I started getting better little by little
42:30the sunlight was especially bright today Finn and I were in the backyard hanging sheets out to dry we
42:36ended up laughing and playing around on either side of the fabric the breeze lifting it between us
42:41then someone called my name from beyond the fence Emma I turned around Brian was standing there the
42:46hanger slipped from my hand and fell straight onto the grass Finn noticed the shift in my expression
42:50immediately and stepped in front of me without hesitation I tugged lightly on the hem of Finn's
42:55flannel shirt it's okay I know him go take care of the blue crabs in the kitchen I just need
43:00a minute
43:01to talk to him we walked over to a wooden bench by the shore the ocean breeze tangled my hair
43:05I forced a
43:06small awkward smile it's been a while Brian he stared at me his voice cold who is that fox my
43:12new fostered
43:12bee skin
43:15you
43:15you
43:15you
43:15you
43:15you
43:15you
43:15you
43:23you
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