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Black men explore how to better support Black women, gender-expansive people, and the broader reproductive justice movement. The discussions tackle deep issues such as financial responsibility, abortion stigma, and how Black men can unlearn harmful patriarchal narratives.
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00:01let's have a candid conversation about accountability relationships and
00:08responsibility it is time for our black men's roundtable please welcome our
00:17facilitator Monica Simpson executive director of sister song actor and
00:26activist Kendrick Samson singer songwriter and actor in New Orleans native Luke
00:34James digital educator diversity and inclusion expert and social media
00:43influencer consciously rapper euro got it content creator Joseph Irving and the
00:55president and CEO of the global black economic forum Alfonso David
01:18Mike check one two check one two there we go hello everybody no no no no no no let's do
01:31that again
01:32hello everyone all right my name is Alfonso David I'm the president and the CEO of
01:40the global black economic forum thank you so much for joining us I'm deeply deeply
01:45honored to be on stage with these gentlemen and I'm just as deeply honored to be in
01:52partnership with sister song and Monica Simpson and a personal point of privilege Monica and I have been
02:03talking about how important it is to talk about social and economic justice and also make sure that
02:11we as men are part of the conversation in a meaningful way on all issues that are affecting women so
02:19this
02:20conversation is an extension of that and I want to just thank Monica publicly for being such a fierce
02:26advocate and such an inclusive person when it comes to all things people of color and black people
02:33specifically and Monica I'll turn it over to you thank you so much Alfonso peace everybody how y'all feeling
02:39today
02:41now I'm going to be talking a little sexy because these allergies are trying to take me out but they
02:45will
02:45not win do you hear me but can y'all hear me okay beautiful well it is truly an honor
02:51to be in conversation
02:52with you all in the audience and with all of my brothers on stage today for those who may be
02:58new to
02:59understanding what reproductive justice is this is a movement that was started by black women in 1994
03:04that asserts that every individual has the human right to be able to make their own decisions about
03:09their bodies their families and their futures what we understand is that our ability to make those
03:15decisions in this country are under attack we understand that abortion bans are killing black women
03:21we understand that black women are dying in hospitals when they're supposed to be getting care
03:26we know that our babies are being taken from us because of state sanctioned violence
03:32violence all of these issues are interconnected and they are all connected to our economic welfare as
03:38well but what we also needed to understand in these moments of being on the front lines of this fight
03:44was what does it mean to have men in the conversation with us and in the work with us in
03:50a meaningful
03:51way what barriers did we have to cross what conversations did we have to have and what work did we
03:58have to do
03:59so these men as well as a few other ones came together because there was a call from a black
04:05woman
04:06that said can you come to the table and start this conversation with us about what does it mean for
04:12black
04:12men to trust black women and to enter into this conversation in a way that would require not only deep
04:19and personal vulnerability but that would also give us what we need to actually win together
04:25so can y'all give it up for these black men that said yes
04:31so i want to take us back y'all to october 20th you all arrived in atlanta georgia
04:38and you came to this room where you were all sitting together and you knew that you were going to
04:42have
04:42to answer some hard questions and have some vulnerable conversations so when we go back to that moment
04:48i wanted just to get us all talking for a moment when we came together now that we filmed together
04:57what was one of the things that you remember now differently that you didn't think about when you came
05:02into that conversation right so we've seen the um we've seen what this has done we've seen the impact
05:09that it's had but what has happened now that you did not think was going to happen whenever you said
05:15yes
05:15to come into that conversation kendrick you want to start us off
05:20do i do i want to start us off yeah let me see hold on okay so what do i
05:28think what i what did i not
05:30expect like the the effect of it i didn't expect i i okay so i was in california buying some
05:38weed
05:40and dude can't the the the the bud tender the the weed man behind the bar i'm talking about right
05:49before i got on the plane to come here black man young black man 20 something years old i thought
05:56he was trying to compliment me on on my career i thought he was like he was like yo yo
06:02no i'm telling
06:03you and i thought he was gonna say something make me feel all good about myself and my career
06:07he was like that round table y'all did trust black women he was like nah i'm telling you i
06:15learned some
06:15shit and i was like that's the effect because most of the time i've told you about the yeah the
06:22um
06:22the comments that you get when you when we wear trust black women they like they gonna say some
06:28dumb like absolutely like uh well not all of them right right and you're like no who who you gonna
06:34trust more right that's real and and instead the shift the real surprise has been young black men
06:43engaging and being like man that was a real ass conversation i could do that with my i need to
06:49have them conversations with myself y'all gonna do another one yeah that's what's up i appreciate
06:53that and we also appreciate you and build power for being a partner and making this thing happen
06:59so what about you luke what showed up for you after the round table that you didn't expect
07:04well i mean you know it did uh i don't exactly uh find myself uh to be a part of
07:10things like that
07:11um i didn't know what to expect um i was just there to listen um and i realized how much
07:19we all need to
07:20listen after that i i saw the the comments i saw all the the repost and just what people thought
07:25took place there and their opinions on what we should do and how the next one should be and
07:31and it really i mean i've always known that we have to have conversation but specifically about
07:38trusting black women yeah i didn't think that was such a hard that really a a a a hard thing
07:44that
07:44was happening right and now i understand i truly understand that it really is a thing that we have to
07:50talk more and more and more and more about right i think as we just look at the world in
07:55totality
07:55i i i i i just think of people who are the most nurturing to me who are the people
08:01that that
08:02rub my back when i need it the most who who who held me down and hold me up i
08:07think of my mother my
08:08aunts my cousins my friends and i can't believe i can't imagine a place where people don't trust them
08:16these people who who have all of this love and power and and and grace and so i after now
08:24i realize
08:24the importance of such a movement yeah uh specifically uh trust black women right right
08:34right right you know that phrase you know like like that you know and um now i realize i'm even
08:41more of a vessel uh to have such conversations yes uncomfortable conversations in a way you know
08:46i don't know everything but i i i hope that i could be somewhat of a inspiration of a listener
08:52because i think the first rule of communication is listening the only thing i i love you but
08:59y'all don't know luke is actually a secret professor that man can teach some classes he be sliding it
09:07in
09:07there but i'm telling you he got the knowledge he can actually put a whole curriculum together i agree
09:12i agree i appreciate you being humble but you definitely dropped a lot of wisdom
09:16in that round table and speaking of wisdom consciously you engage all the time across so
09:24many different sectors conversations and we know the manosphere is real right we know that there is
09:31an intentional um agenda of moving particular types of propaganda through black men into our
09:38communities but this was an opportunity to shift the culture of that and you came into that
09:43conversation with the intention of doing that so what has happened for you or what have you seen
09:49differently on the other side i i have been upset that many people view the framework of trusting black
09:58women through a sexual lens meaning if you're not having sex with black women you shouldn't have a
10:04conversation about trusting black women and i know a lot of the conversation was uh pushed towards
10:09him and me because people believe my wife is not black and believe that because he's gay
10:13he shouldn't have a conversation what caught me off guard in this is not understanding how
10:18everybody in the world has a relationship to trusting black women and loving black women
10:23and the idea that if you don't have this this this uh this relationship then i feel like you shouldn't
10:29be a part of the conversation it's something that after the conversation happened i have to really
10:32sit back and think like so what y'all saying is if you believe this individual doesn't have the
10:39intimate relationship with a black woman on an individual level that you believe there should
10:44be no communal conversation around trusting black women it blows my mind and then sitting next to him
10:50i i don't know if y'all saw the the uh the round table i was trying to ask luke
10:56a question i say luke man
10:59when when did you start when did you start loving black women i think it's like this i asked somebody's
11:05mom and i'll never forget this luke looked me dead in my eyes and said i was adopted and him
11:12responding
11:12to me that way talking about hey i get my love for black women for my black mom he said
11:18i had to
11:19negotiate that because my mom gave me up when i was born we having a conversation about trusting and
11:25loving black women and he made me cry i had to really fight back tears because what luke had
11:31said so shout out to you luke i appreciate you brother yeah that was really powerful a powerful
11:35moment i'm gonna come back to you alfonzo but joseph you were in that room and you came into the
11:42room
11:42so vulnerably as well bringing yourself and your full self into the conversation right and you
11:49definitely interjected a lot right that helped to ignite a lot right in the conversation so what
11:57about you what what has shifted for you before we go into our direct questions i feel like i said
12:01what
12:01i needed to say for y'all like i mean i i don't i feel what i did not expect
12:07was the amount of
12:10divisiveness um you know like a lot of people on social media it was really split it was like 50
12:1450
12:15you know so um but as far as like what i said and everything i i i feel comfortable so
12:21i mean i i knew
12:22what was going to happen i figured it was going to so that's real that's real what about you
12:28mr you're all got it uh well um i got so caught up in justin's response um can you give
12:38me the
12:38question one more time oh no for sure what has shifted for you when thinking about what you walked
12:43into and now what you have seen come out on the other side what has shifted or what is something
12:48new that you didn't think about before um i think there's a lot of things that go on in the
12:54mind but
12:55if it doesn't come out publicly i think that sometimes you can get comfortable in that lack
13:00of accountability of like i still got time to get it together but once you have a conversation with
13:05other people that's holding themselves accountable um other individuals that may have more knowledge
13:11than you it makes you get on course because now you have other people watching you to make sure
13:15you stand up to be that caliber of person if you're going to be at a round table of people
13:21that are
13:22striving to be better so for me um it was a lot of soaking in information that i didn't know
13:28learning to compromise and that is not always what i think learning how to dismantle patriarchy
13:35a lot of the things that luke james was bringing about a lot of the things that kendrick had to
13:40correct me on justin's pov um even lakeith i wish he was here as well everybody brought some to the
13:46table that enhanced the accountability i need to take for myself to make sure that my pure intentions
13:52align with what i was trying to do to set this up for my woman and my kids and everybody
13:57else watching
13:58so no that's beautiful so alfonso you watched this right and you saw this intergenerational
14:05conversation this conversation amongst black men cisgendered trans black men gay black men right
14:13black men who came into this conversation through their lived experience folks who came into the
14:19conversation um deeply committed to understanding and transforming systems all of these black men came
14:26with so many different vantage points to the conversation and you got to see how they all came
14:32together what was that experience like for you as a viewer and a black man who's been working
14:37on trying to find this connection
14:43um i think watching this was so instructive as a viewer because it demystifies this idea that all of us
14:55look at
14:56what we're going to do to describe issues or people or women through one lens
15:01yeah and that's important not only as it relates to black men interfacing with black women
15:06but it relates to how we all think about ourselves if i'm interacting with you just as a human being
15:14yeah my perceptions and reflections are going to shift based on my personal experiences
15:22based on how i grew up based on how i grew up based on who i know based on my
15:27trauma and sometimes we
15:30ignore those when we are just simply looking at either gender or race right and this conversation is
15:38deeply important because we know in this country that as people of color we face significant challenges
15:48but we also know that black women all of us come from black women
15:55or all of us come from black women not just us sitting on the stage everybody
16:04i'll say that again all of us come from black women that's so real and so if you sit with
16:11that
16:11yeah and you think about how we have that relationship with our mothers and our sisters and our aunts
16:19and our girlfriends we have to recognize that our history still carries deep imprint
16:31on how we navigate the world so for me as a viewer it was a fantastic experience yeah but it
16:37also
16:38highlighted all of the work that we have yet to do i agree with you on that so much you
16:42know for us
16:43when we came to this conversation sister song and build power it was about how do we create a pathway
16:49for black men because we know what the issues are we know how delicate and how vulnerable it is for
16:56black women to talk about what's going on with our bodies the attacks on our bodies and for us to
17:02talk
17:02about how in some of those cases far too many of them those who were inflicting the pain inflicting
17:08the violence right unfortunately is coming from the men in our lives right or those that we have had
17:13to be in contact with so this was not something that we took lightly right we wanted to be very
17:19intentional about making sure that each one of you were rooted in this reproductive justice frame
17:24but that we gave you enough spaciousness to be able to talk about your own lived experiences
17:29because that is the only way that we're going to be able to build that bridge together so kendrick for
17:35you you have consistently used your platform to connect entertainment and activism how has organizing
17:45changed your understanding of masculinity and how can we pull the next generation of leaders
17:51leaders into the field while challenging their patriarchal beliefs damn wait right come on wait
17:59hold on no i'm gonna tell it to you differently all right you use your platform to do this all
18:05the time
18:06what is it going to take for us to bring more men in to this conversation i think one so
18:11we're called
18:12bill power so we focus a lot on power and i think one thing that we have to acknowledge if
18:17we think if
18:17we're we're we're agreeing that everyone came from a black woman then power started in the black
18:22woman's womb for for humanity you get what i'm saying there's no there's no more powerful place
18:28on this earth than the black woman's womb for creation right no more powerful creative place
18:33for creation on this earth for humanity than the black woman's womb which is why black women are targeted
18:40in the way that they are um when you think about tex you you think about texas texas has the
18:47highest rate
18:48of black women dying and during birth and that is not black women's fault you get what i'm saying
18:56it's the medical system it's it's it's it's this system that we live in and a lot of the time
19:02black men
19:03start to talk about when we talk about protecting black women we we think about protecting them as as we
19:09own
19:09them or their property or um they're attacking black men and putting them in prison because they want
19:15to break up the home no they're attacking black men and putting them in prison so that they can attack
19:20the black woman because the black woman is the power that they're after right and so if we understand
19:26our connection to that power if black men understood our connection to that power if we understood that
19:33our culture is not a luxury it's not a holiday it's not like you know an extracurricular activity
19:39it's actually how we connect to our power and the holders of the culture are black women we understand
19:46that our strategy has to be completely focused on black women and freeing black women and empowering
19:51them and supporting their power in order for all of us to get free come on now come on this
19:58is what
19:59reproductive justice looks like y'all feel me okay now consciously you work to challenge people to
20:08think critically while keeping culture at the center but you were the one in the in the round table that
20:16brought in the concept of patriarchy and why it is important for men to be committed to dismantling
20:23the system of patriarchy how do we make that more accessible for people who may not understand the
20:31word patriarchy but are complicit with it sometimes even unknowingly how do we break that down to make
20:39that shift great question great question i think um first being able to make a metaphor a lot of black
20:46men understand racism and white supremacy but we have a hard time understanding you know sexism and
20:51misogyny so usually i can tell black men it's like hey you can acknowledge that white people on an
20:57individual level can do good and bad and it doesn't negate what it means for the communal level for
21:02white folks how they do is do you have a white friend that you care about sure do you have
21:06white
21:07people yeah sure does this negate the white supremacy reality no it does not uh for responding to
21:13patriarchy a lot of times when i'm dealing in the community i try to be mindful of not using too
21:18much
21:18academic jargon so instead of saying patriarchy i talk about like male domination or hey have you
21:25ever heard the term ain't no fun unless we all get some let me explain to you how this facilitates
21:31male
21:32domination at the expense of women and then we're able to kind of start raising their consciousness
21:36a lot of times we jump too quickly into using terms with the community that's not of our of our
21:43community and i want to be clear i'm not being anti-academic or anti-intellectual i'm acknowledging
21:48there are black people that's invested in the community invested in that in the academy that really
21:52do a lot of research what i am also acknowledging is that there are people that are most likely to
21:57cause harm towards black women that's not in academia so i gotta think about how can i use the
22:04language to talk to them brothers over there and what i find is that using different things that's
22:09happening hip-hop or different lyrics that happen in hip-hop it's able to abridge and able to really
22:15kendrick you was right you was you was right your professor he be sneaking it in the guy whispering
22:21it he's a professor i'm telling you hey listen y'all if i feel like all of y'all in
22:27here know that luke is
22:28pretty brilliant but i think that he sometimes he is so kind of uh uh i don't want to say
22:33shy but like
22:34guard it then i feel like he don't let it out so i'm hoping through this through this round table
22:39that he will start to you know express more of his intellectual analysis you feel me from a from a
22:45from the same mike that he's seen from i'm saying i like that y'all like that i'm saying they
22:51wanted
22:51they wanted that but it's not it's also not even intellectual it's literally just grounded in who he is
22:57just like you're talking about breaking it down to like practical how we live and how we can change
23:04our behavior like just like on a hey why are you doing that shit i'll do that and it's grounded
23:10in
23:10political theory he don't ever recite the political theory he just says this is the outcome this is
23:15this is what you need to pay attention to and you can guarantee that's the part that is so actually
23:20so
23:21powerful in it is people talk all the time and have good intentions i want to make sure that you
23:25don't
23:25hurt her i want to make sure that we good give back to the community you know that ain't got
23:31no
23:31political ground and it ain't got no strategy black women are not at the center of it at all
23:36um no strategy to it at all his every time he's given a suggestion even if it seems like hey
23:42just pay
23:43attention to this i guarantee is grounded in that political theory there is so much academia and
23:48intellects behind it but he doesn't have to present it in an intellectual way and i i think we need
23:53to
23:54stop i think part of it is understanding that when they talk about slang and ebonics and aav and all
24:00this and try to put it as like this this um you know something that we that this that's inferior
24:06to
24:07academia like you have to go and get a master's or doctorate i i'm i guarantee you what we speak
24:14on
24:15the street is way more complex than they will ever be able to understand now that's a word
24:21that's that's the word talking about a master's or doctorate they ain't ever gonna be able to learn
24:25what this is there's no degree that's gonna give them that understanding when we can talk to each
24:30other the way we talk to each other and get us to change our behavior so that we can be
24:35freer and
24:36more powerful that's what the culture's always been grounded in back to the continent that's word and i
24:42think that was what we saw on the panel like one we brought that thing down you all did because
24:48i
24:48didn't but you brought that thing down in a way that people were able to understand it at such a
24:53personal level and i saw the camaraderie that you all were building with each other in that experience
25:00so luke millions of people witnessed your vulnerability during this roundtable but very
25:08people very few people know what happened after the camera stopped since the conversation how has that
25:15honesty continued to shape you emotionally and how has it changed the way you show up as a partner
25:22and as a father because you really brought that into the conversation so beautifully as well thank you um
25:30i'm just constantly learning i am i am i am a sponge and and and i don't i'm in a
25:37space of i don't
25:37know everything and i'm really just trying to figure this out and and in some ways this is a lot
25:42for me
25:43because i'm i i i i like to sing and i can play a character and i can sit behind
25:49that you know and and
25:51i can close my eyes and and let god move me you know and but then to sit down and
25:56be grounded in this
25:57conversation as myself um i have to think about my son i have to think about my experience
26:06experience with my partner to to childbirth and and all the fears that she may be having and
26:13you know i i know i i want to be a father and and yes yes yes but i don't
26:18know how scary that might be
26:20for her and and i just want everybody to have a good time in everything you do right so especially
26:27with
26:28my partner i want her to i i just i just want to make sure she is just really good
26:33and it has opened
26:35me up to really just understand everything in totality everything we do you know how we move
26:40in the world but also it's sometimes for me it's i find myself um i don't know if i can
26:48articulate it i
26:49don't know if it's it's it's it's you know palatable for people because also i'm i could be floaty and
26:54i could just i'm trying to find it right because i don't know everything and and i'm just letting
26:59the spirit move me as i am right now so at the same time but to bridge that gap is
27:05is inserting people
27:07who like myself who i don't really want to talk about it you know i got a lot i'm thinking
27:12about
27:12it i see a lot and yeah you know but but they make it they make it in such a
27:19way um that that i feel
27:22well you make it y'all make it in such a way that i feel comfortable to be here
27:27and not feel like i i'm i'm being uh critiqued in in in my knowledge i'm just i just want
27:35to you're
27:35allowing me to be honest and whatever it is my experience is yeah and uh you know but no that's
27:44so real i think that's what was really powerful about the round table y'all because here's the thing
27:49we want our brothers to be in these conversations with us right we want them to like be the protectors
27:55we want them to be on the lines with us but do we give them the opportunity to say the
28:01wrong thing
28:02do we give them the opportunity to ask the questions maybe not in the best way all the time do
28:08we give
28:08them the opportunity to also be vulnerable and so in this experience we were able to create a table
28:15for you all to do that in a very interesting sometimes complicated yes but a very real way
28:22right yes but i mean it's ugly it's there's no way there's no way we can get to this without
28:29it being
28:30all of that because there's so much you know there's so much life that we've all lived individually
28:36right and to talk about something such that that is deep well we got to go deep and you have
28:43to do it
28:44you know you can't expect especially for us men we some of us don't know how to talk we know
28:50we know
28:50how to be physical though we know how to present the you know the physicality and but the beauty of
28:57it
28:57is when you're in a round circle that that everybody kind of understands that that's we're going to have
29:02to do that in a barber shop there's a lot of yelling there's a lot of yelling and if you
29:06have
29:07never been in a black barber shop you might think somebody's about to fight right right but that's
29:12that's just sometimes it's just that's how it's got to come out because you know it's this energy we
29:17we don't all have control of it but in that space we feel uh welcomed to give our our point
29:25of view
29:26and we'll find we'll find that way we'll settle it down where we need to settle it down but there's
29:30that it has to be that in order to heal you have to you have to remove the layers of
29:36of of whatever
29:37that is that is infecting the the situation right so that that hurts and that's not pretty that's not
29:44fun that's uncomfortable i don't feel seen i don't feel heard i feel i feel combative i feel like i
29:50feel
29:51like y'all coming at me y'all don't understand me y'all got me with some young boys i'm
29:55old y'all you know
29:57it's like what y'all you know it's a lot you know i remember clifton powell he was just the
30:01entire time
30:02leading up to it he was like i don't know if i'm supposed to be here right you know he
30:06had a hard
30:06time but we had to just you know it's a lot we he's not he ain't the only one dealing
30:13with everything
30:13so we had to hold each other down and that's that's why this is important we have to hold each
30:19other
30:20the best way we can i also think there's something really really really powerful in there in a
30:27perspective um you know when we create spaces where it's not the quickest way to lose somebody is to be
30:34like well the adjudication of the blah blah blah right if we can talk if we can talk regular and
30:41we
30:41know we speak each other language we got a shorthand and we can be vulnerable for black men for any
30:47man
30:48we're taught because of this fucked up country uh we're taught that that the vulnerability
30:56is weakness and it's where our power is and so when we feel vulnerable when we start talking and we
31:03open it up we get defensive and we don't realize that the place we feel most vulnerable
31:10vulnerable is with black women and we also don't realize when that's paired to you're most likely
31:15to be hurt by the person you're closest to you're more likely to be hurt by somebody close to you
31:24there's much more of a responsibility to make sure that that vulnerability is practiced in a way that
31:30doesn't lead to harm that it leads the other direction because on the other side of that vulnerability
31:36on the other side of those those places where we do feel like we might fight it's transformation on
31:42the other side of that if we handle it right and that transforms behavior and culture in a way that's
31:48much more healthier and powerful for all of us that's absolutely right we are winding down good folks but
31:55joseph and your god i want to make sure i get you all's um uh your voices in this before
31:59we close out
32:00and alfonso you can close this down right so joseph speaking of conflict you showed us what it means
32:07to move through conflict in real time right you were so vulnerable but you are also so honest and so
32:15real
32:16and yes that was a moment that the internet went in on right but what did that mean for you
32:22and what
32:23did it um what did it show you in terms of your own strength of how to effectively move through
32:31conflict but how do we get to transformation on the other side say the question one more time i was
32:38trying to i'm sorry say no you're fine babe i just want to know how that how was that for
32:43you right and
32:44what did it mean to like be in conflict in real time to the world it's a courage it took
32:51courage for you
32:51to did say to openly say what you needed to say i feel like one thing with me i lead
32:57with integrity
32:57and i feel that for someone to actually like trust is something that connects people trust is something
33:06that makes someone want to even hear you so for me i think in that own situation like i'm not
33:11someone
33:11i'm not gonna just sit up there and lie or like make up like you know a story or something
33:16like that
33:16i'm just this is my lived experience you know um i think in that it's just i think sometimes i
33:23put my
33:23own self down and like think like oh like you know you do have a gift i i saw a
33:27lot of comments where
33:28people were like oh my gosh you as a gay man i can't imagine you sitting in you know a
33:33room full of
33:34like straight men or like you know you you know talking against clifton i'm like y'all i'm just gay
33:40like i'm a big old man you see me up here like girl come on you know lay i'm playing
33:45stop i mean
33:46like but i think just the power of it though sometimes in my own head i play down situations
33:52but it's just like you know have a voice and speak up into other things that you encounter but as
33:57far
33:57as the situation with him um yeah i mean like i think like that's something that happens behind
34:02closed doors a lot or a lot of people don't have the strength to do that a lot of you
34:06have grandfathers
34:07or like even like grandmothers it's it's a big difference 25 to 30 to 40 to 50 years of age
34:14difference there's a lot of things that they experienced that we have not so equally to
34:19respectability politics there are things that he's lived that i'm not understand and sometimes you just
34:24have to just respect people for where they are so yeah and i think that what you all were able
34:29to do
34:29on the other side was where the where the beautiful powerful moment was right it was just so so beautiful
34:36on the other side and like kendrick said it's going to take us being willing to go through that with
34:42each other so that we can actually get to those moments on the other side you got it you are
34:48in
34:48this conversation as a person that's been deeply connected to hip-hop and we know that hip-hop has been
34:54you know it's given us some things that have been very hard right problematic i mean it's been super
35:00problematic right but you came into this conversation wanting to be vulnerable about
35:06that too how was this conversation for you bringing in the hip-hop angle and what are you hoping that
35:15those who are committed to hip-hop get from this conversation well i think i think first it's not
35:21necessarily about being connected to hip-hop but being connected to a purpose and my purpose is god and
35:28always has been unfortunately the foundation that i had as far as a mother and father it was what to
35:35me seemed like a middle-class family but it was actually actually poverty when it came to the mindset
35:41of things and i only learned that through going through therapy and realizing the leadership that i
35:46lacked and the providing skills that i lacked when trying to take care of my family so it went until
35:52some ugly truths had to come about to where it led me to saying god listen even when i got
35:58into the music
36:00after dodging a life sentence i'm like i'm committed to purpose so maybe through hip-hop
36:05i can give me a check but i could also i can blend in coming from this environment to be
36:12able to lead
36:12brothers to a different light but i had to also understand there was an agenda in play agenda in place
36:19and if i stay on the course of following this agenda i can get some money but i could still
36:25be
36:25hypocritical by rapping one thing and trying to tell you to do something else and so it came to a
36:31point
36:31where even with the music i didn't want to rap about i'm not in poverty no more i'm not i
36:36don't want to
36:36rap about killing i don't want to rap about i got kids listening to my music it was just kind
36:41of like
36:42god i don't know what i do from here but i do want to have a purpose with who i
36:46am and what my voice is
36:48and you know god just working miraculous ways to where sister song came and it's just being
36:55prepared for the opportunity because you never know how it's going to come about it wasn't really
36:58too much that i was doing outside of trying to live my life better that led to this opportunity
37:03for me to actually express what it's like now that i've been in therapy now that i've underwent
37:09certain situations that you know could have led caused me to go astray but i'm like nah i'm
37:15going to keep my intentions pure i'm going to keep god as the head of my as the head of
37:19my life and
37:20i'm going to take care of my family that i feel like is it's steered away from hip-hop but
37:25it's
37:25still within the community so i'm still here i'm still still a face of something and i'm grateful for
37:31that that's so beautiful thank you and i thank you for the opportunity as well i appreciate 100 y'all
37:38this
37:38wasn't an easy conversation for us to to do to have to organize as an organization um but we knew
37:45it was
37:45something that we had to do and this is only the beginning these brothers said yes to the first step
37:51in what is going to have to be a long series of conversations a long series of interventions
37:58of ways for us to deeply connect more and to be more intentional about how we're having conversations
38:05sharing our stories with each other alfonzo we've been doing this for a minute with each other
38:11right and we've both been super committed to finding a way to build this bridge so as we're getting ready
38:18to close out now um what what are you hopeful about in this moment as this being a first step
38:25in this
38:26conversation you know what i say one of the most important things we can do as adults
38:34is understand when and how to take off our masks
38:40we end up developing masks over time in order just to function in order to navigate the world in order
38:49to protect ourselves we have these shields that we create especially here in the u.s but also in other
38:56parts of the world as people of color we face significant obstacles in order just to survive
39:03you have to create these shields and these masks it's just as important to understand that they are
39:11shields and that they are masks and you have to understand how you take them off that's right
39:17because if you don't understand how to take them off you suffer yeah your family suffers your community
39:25suffers yeah and you're not able to sort of deconstruct the vestiges of slavery that we still live with
39:31today so this conversation is intergenerational it is deeply spiritual and is deeply political 100
39:41so this is just the beginning yeah and it is our honor to be in partners with all of you
39:48i know
39:48this work let me just tell you all one more thing black women i came to this work of reproductive
39:57justice
39:57because of my own lived experiences the things i've experienced so many of us have so many shared
40:04experiences but why this conversation for me was so transformative was because i was living in a world
40:12as a black queer woman born and raised in the south that truly did not believe that there was a
40:20black man
40:20that would protect me if there was no opportunity for him to potentially have some level of sexual
40:28connection to me that was my truth and i was doing this work out of that truth for myself because
40:36i didn't
40:37believe it was possible and so in this conversation i had an opportunity to be transformed within myself
40:45because i am able to see that that is something i took on in myself because of my own trauma
40:53of the things
40:54i experienced for myself that i no longer wanted to be my reality so what these black men didn't realize
41:02that they were doing for me and what i didn't even realize that they were doing for me
41:06was giving me an opportunity to release that trauma so if that is happening for me
41:13as a black woman who's been doing this work for 20 years imagine what it can do for so many
41:19other black women
41:20holding so many other things this is why we do this work we do this work in order for us
41:27not only
41:28to do the political work to get ourselves free but the spiritual and deeply personal work to get us free
41:37within ourselves do y'all feel what i'm saying that is what liberation is so i want to thank you
41:45all again
41:46for saying yes for saying yes to something you didn't even know but you were doing for saying
41:51yes to something that has not only changed the internet but it's going to continue to change lives
41:57and thank you all for saying yes to this conversation we love you thank you thank you thank you
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