- 3 hours ago
Superboy vs. Alien
Category
š„
Short filmTranscript
00:12Let go of the president!
00:15Hand over the nuclear codes, or I stick this down your...
00:19Hey! Who's hungry for some fried calamari?
00:26It's Commander Z, leader of the Zenrath League!
00:32What's up? How's your grandpa doing, Amelia?
00:35The last time I saved him...
00:37Shoot him!
00:58Let's get this over with. I have a thing later.
01:01Let's get this over with.
01:02Let's get this over with.
01:27Let's get this over with.
01:30Don't worry, buddy. I know a really good tailor.
01:39You've done it again, Commander Z! It took the FBI five years...
01:43...fighting these alien terrorists, but it only took you five months undercover to find them and just five minutes to
01:50take him out!
01:51Told you I have a thing later, sir.
01:53Please, let me honor you with a public announcement.
01:56Whoa, sir, with all due respect.
01:59I just want to live my life.
02:16As a normal high school senior.
02:20Sir! Your tux!
02:24Fuck!
02:25I'm gonna be late for our date!
02:27Ivy's gonna be real mad!
02:29And your flowers!
02:31Thanks, Alphonse, but I'm gonna need more than this.
02:34Help me get her a good apology present.
02:36Something fancy, okay?
02:39Another gift?
02:40But you just secretly got her into Zenith League.
02:48Whoa!
02:49Watch it!
02:50Hey, I know you like what you're seeing, but maybe buy the lady a drink first?
02:59Wait!
03:00You're Catgirl Kimi!
03:02Newly melted rank-esque superhero-man?
03:05I know, you fanboys want my autograph.
03:09Sorry to disappoint, but I have a girlfriend already.
03:12She's the only superhero for me.
03:14Oh, good.
03:15Cause I don't have time to chit-chat with nerds.
03:17You can run along to your girlfriend while I go save the president.
03:20Don't sweat it, I...
03:21I already took care of the alien.
03:22Wait!
03:23Took care of the alien?
03:25You?
03:26Name's Zeno.
03:29That's the next wave of enemies!
03:30Wait!
03:30I should tell you, there's only one way to kill them.
03:33Who do you think I am?
03:34I'm Catgirl, Bird's natural predator!
03:35Not those guys!
03:36Their feathered coats are made of a special metal.
03:38It's impenetrable.
03:39Go for the inside of their beaks.
03:41And how would you know...
03:43What whatever!
03:44Who is he to tell me how to fight?
03:52Phew!
03:53Made it!
03:54Right on time.
03:58Why is there a party here?
04:01Ivy?
04:02Hey, anyone seen Ivy?
04:06Ivy, I brought you flowers for our dating anniversary, and...
04:10I'm glad you made it, Zeno.
04:11This is my breakup party, cause I'm dumping you.
04:16Breaking up?
04:17We just hit our two...
04:18You missed the entire half of the school year!
04:20I know!
04:21You're bland and you blend in!
04:22Hang on, I'm bland?
04:23What?
04:24You've been mixing sriracha with bees in your drink or something?
04:28But you're utterly foreforgettable now!
04:30And that's embarrassing me!
04:32Seriously?
04:32Simps are supposed to try extra hard for your attention.
04:36He doesn't even try.
04:37Guess he's a failure at that too.
04:39Excuse me, though I'm enjoying the sweet talk.
04:42This is between me and my girlfriend.
04:44Stop pretending like you can even protect me or have anything to offer, Zeno!
04:49And how would you know that?
04:50Because I'm...
04:52Gonna be the new face of Zenith League!
04:55I was just recruited by the number one superhero league in the world.
04:59As for you, class rankings came out already, haven't you seen them?
05:04You missed so much of mercenary school.
05:06You missed all the trials to get into the superhero leagues.
05:09Your lowest of the lows, rank Z!
05:13And you know Zenith League only takes rank A's and above.
05:15I can't be seen with you like this.
05:22They're asking me, Commander Z of the entire league, to try out for my own team?
05:28You don't understand.
05:30Would King Kong go to school just to prove he can squash a tiny little bug?
05:34I thought so.
05:35Look closely.
05:36I only score so low, so that you, Ivy, don't have to feel so bad about coming in last place.
05:43I didn't ask you to do those things!
05:45Quit trying to guilt trip me!
05:47I bet even if your parents were alive, they'd ditch you for a more gifted son, too!
05:56What?
06:03I'd kill you just for fun.
06:05But why waste time on a maggot like you?
06:08I won't let you get away with this!
06:10I won't let you get away with this!
06:12No!
06:14that was the day i unlocked my powers and that was when i promised to never let another child
06:20go through the same hell i did my parents died protecting this world don't sell their memories
06:26or what and too bad you didn't inherit your parents super genes otherwise you wouldn't
06:32be such a loser whatever xenon you can stay at the bottom because i've upgraded for someone
06:38better someone who can actually take me to high places hey what's up nerd
06:54you cheated on me ivy
06:58brad has super strength in his rank a zenith league just accepted him
07:02he's my real hero oh my god his superhero name is the boulder how cool is that
07:08and you're just a powerless weakling born to be a loser ah baby i'm so sore from benching 500 today
07:14oh i'll massage them for you looks like i gained another power invisibility ivy doesn't have to
07:20give a damn about you because guess what zenith league is starting an all-girl special team and
07:25ivy is going to be on it that's right it's led by the drop dead gorgeous cat girl kimi and
07:31i'm the
07:31newest member oh i'm so excited why aren't you applauding you should be happy i'm making you
07:37famous for being my ex-boyfriend that's because i was the one who got you man
07:49that xeno guy was right about birdman's weakness i could have died if it weren't for his intel
07:55whoever he is i must find him
08:00you got me into zenith league oh it's almost cute his vocab is so limited he doesn't even know the
08:07meaning of zenith league i'm commander z the creator and literal definition of zenith league
08:13yeah even i know zenith means top of the top what are those glasses for anyways keep your
08:19mediocrity away from me don't be an idiot xeno you don't even have powers i only got into zenith
08:26league all thanks to brad his dad is the headhunter i see how it is your lame excuses aren't doing
08:32a
08:32very good job covering up your greed and to think i was going to take you to the top with
08:36me not
08:36anymore i know you're sensitive and i broke your fragile little heart but let's face it there's no
08:41future with you that's because you're too busy plummeting to the ground too bad this glorified
08:46piece of rock isn't going to save you from the oncoming regret when you realize that your upgrade
08:51is a downgrade i'll show you who's a downgrade
09:11i made a promise to my parents that i was only going to use my powers for good not petty
09:15fights
09:22nobody's ever deflected my punch before much less catch it how did he oh he's so big and strong
09:28they don't call brad the boulder for nothing you fools are made for each other zeno even being
09:35invisible would do you more good than having no powers i'm sorry for you you can save the pity for
09:41yourself you know what this guy's ruined the whole party i've got a bigger bachelor pod let's head over
09:45there here's a lesson before i leave you in the dust zeno love is for fairy tales even i know
09:50that
09:53a loser so that's what my first girlfriend thinks of me huh well joke's on her
10:01because from where i stand i see a hero
10:15that's thanks for helping me take down the enemy oh you mean the pigeon guys
10:21thought you said you had them in the bag miss rank s
10:26i didn't a good cat admits when she's met her better half guess you're not just some nerd you'd be
10:31an
10:31asset to zenerith league how about you become our battle tactician is that an invite to my own
10:39superhero league it is tomorrow's the first day training for new recruits your ex-girlfriend will
10:45be there too i can tell everyone you're my boyfriend help you get back at her i went from tactician
10:51to
10:51boyfriend in less than five seconds that's a little fast i have to think about it i live life
10:55on the edge bottoms up boo this is a good chance to see what my team is actually like i'll
11:02stay
11:02undercover for this first training day is like frat rush you'll have to go through a gauntlet of
11:10opponents but i bet you'll have plenty of pointers for our heroes if they're actually any good then
11:14they won't need my help oh you'll be surprised you go in there first i'm gonna change i'll be back
11:19in a moment to introduce you first training day i'm ready to shoot up some new recruits
11:32again you nearly killed everyone in our last batch and a bunch of villagers too maybe save some fun for
11:38me this time huh what the hell i created zenith league so the world's best superheroes can fight crime
11:44and evil together not torment civilians oh my gosh zenith league even upgraded my weapon for me
11:54personally delivered by cat girl kiwi sidekick too and it's all thanks to you for recommending me brad
12:01i want a rematch for that arm wrestling the other day oh yeah you want to get whooped again
12:31this what you superheroes do all day getting off on measuring guns and stroking your eagles
12:38xeno what the hell are you doing here this is only for zenith league superheroes and recruits
12:43your technique's all wrong you got to engage your toes oh and never underestimate pinky power
12:49who's this weak looking twig ignore him he's just a powerless loser from mercenary school came in dead
12:53last in class zero powers i can't believe it brad he's so desperate he's stalking me now that's so
12:59creepy ivy aren't you just a new recruit don't talk like you own the place or i may have to
13:05humble you
13:07you beat us dude did i hit you too hard on the head last time you lost
13:14you're like a helpless puppy on the streets begging for attention you're the one who's all bark and no
13:19bite this isn't a challenge for me because beating you guys would be like squashing amp that's it four
13:24eyes you can only read about how to fight in a textbook but i've got real combat experience
13:34so let me show you what makes me a real man or maybe i'll teach you a lesson in humility
13:42give up xenon i know you're desperate to get me back but you have no powers you're not even good
13:46enough to be the towel boy i told you i'm not interested in your petty little games come on
13:50loser you don't even want to fight back after your girl chose me what you scared of course he's scared
13:54brad everyone knows you've got super strength and you're the strongest of our class you're going to
13:57break his arm in less than a second you keep underestimating me ivy but you're going to regret
14:02it her only regret is not dumping your nerdy ass earlier now put your arm up and if you don't
14:06trigger happy will show you a real good time games and powers that's all they care about instead of
14:11helping those in need i really should clean house go on arm up dipshit better use that pinky power you
14:19were talking about if you want to live if you're rank a then what am i
14:42what the hell was that you look scared i thought you were the bolder
14:47not very bold are you i told you your stance was all wrong nobody has ever beat brad before
14:55this this is impossible what kind of trickery did you pull on me spill it i'd never lose
15:02i won fair and square bro who's the sore loser now
15:12enough no more of this xenon i know i broke your fragile little heart when i dumped you but this
15:16is no place for your circus act yeah your loser ex-boyfriend just wants to humiliate you in front
15:21of all the heroes at zenith league do you even know what this place is xenon this is the danger
15:27room
15:27the ultimate training arena for zenith league designed by cat girl kimmy herself is the only
15:34rank-ass female fighter in the league nobody dares to mess with her well i didn't need those glasses
15:38anyways depressed this whip is the very proof that i belong here yeah your aim really has improved with
15:43that new whip zenith league upgraded it with material that can even burn through an iron wall before you
15:47couldn't even hit an elephant if it was two feet in front of you stop talking down to me i'm
15:51a somebody now
15:51you're a nobody what are you gonna do actually whip me i'm not your boyfriend anymore or are you begging
15:56me back now that's it i'm getting rid of you once and for all
16:09he caught my whip
16:12and this whip is injected with venom too how is he still okay
16:16you said you got this whip because cat girl kimmy recruited you to be on her girl power squad
16:21yes and you better watch it you can fish in this if you mess with me that's messing
16:27with cat girl kimmy you're an idiot xeno and i thought you were at least book smart all of us
16:33here are rank a heroes we could pumple you to mush if we wanted to but now you're straight up
16:38tempting
16:38death cat girl kimmy skinned her last opponent birdman alive you know that oh yes i heard she told me
16:43the whole thing you see kimiko was the one who invited me today are you kidding me cat girl kimiko
16:49is a
16:49great guest hero she would never be caught with a powerless weaker like you
16:52oof they say only sticks and stones can hurt me actually nothing can it's time i take back
16:58everything i ever gave you and put you in your place
17:08my whip so are we just gonna stand around and talk or are we gonna fight
17:21what was that xeon you paid for this brad do something
17:29this all you got all i feel is a light breeze you don't want to play with hellfire
17:38you just look like an ape drenched in kerosene get a grip
17:46hey he's getting me trigger happy let's hit him all at once
17:55i want his head
17:57Charging!
17:58No!
18:20You just kissed him?
18:23Do you know who that is?
18:25That's just some nobody from mercenary school!
18:28Yep.
18:29My new battle tactician.
18:31And he's got better moves than everyone in this room.
18:34Combined.
18:35He has zero rank.
18:37He's not even a recruit.
18:38He's a towel boy.
18:39He beat your arm in under a second.
18:42Anyone else want to debate his qualifications?
18:45You could have just shaken my hand.
18:47Where's the fun in that?
18:49My office.
18:50Five minutes.
18:53Do something!
18:55Oh, I'm gonna do something.
19:01Tonight, there's a data heist at the Federal Tech Vault downtown.
19:05Someone's going after Zenith League's classified files.
19:09How classified?
19:10Identity level.
19:11Real names.
19:12Home addresses.
19:14Every active hero in the league.
19:15Including mine.
19:17You'll come as tech support.
19:18Stay in comms range and call the shots from the outside.
19:22Boomerang and I go in.
19:23What do we know about the crew hitting the vault?
19:29Goes by Vortex.
19:31New.
19:32Nobody's faced him yet and walked away with their power intact.
19:35He drains supers on contact.
19:37One touch.
19:39Gone.
19:39Everything.
19:40One touch.
19:42So he can only drain one person at a time?
19:45Yes.
19:46Then don't let him get his hands on both of you at once.
19:50You keep him splitting his attention.
19:52He can't drain what he can't catch.
19:54See?
19:55That's why you're here.
20:00Meet me at the van in an hour.
20:02Try not to look too smart.
20:04It's distracting.
20:07I built this league to protect people.
20:09If Vortex gets those files,
20:11every hero I trained is a walking target.
20:16We're in.
20:16Server room's two floors down.
20:18Three heat signatures ahead of you.
20:20Vortex is the one hanging back.
20:21He'll let his crew engage first.
20:23He waits until you're distracted.
20:24Look at that.
20:25He strategizes.
20:38Boomerang!
20:39Left!
20:45Now!
20:50I can't feel it.
20:52My power's gone.
20:54Stay down.
20:55Cat girl.
20:57Rank ass.
20:58I've been looking forward to this.
21:01Keep him reaching left, Ankini.
21:03Don't let him vacuum into a corner.
21:05He's counting on that.
21:10Who's in your ear?
21:26Interesting.
21:26Nothing to drain.
21:28Nothing to drain.
21:29Or is there something you're hiding?
21:38This isn't over.
21:40Not even close.
21:45He felt something.
21:46That's a problem.
21:49Boomerang's power will return fully in 48 hours.
21:52The download was stopped.
21:54Mission's a win.
21:54A win?
21:55Boomerang got drained.
21:57Nobody's ever taken her down before.
21:58She'd be completely powerless right now if Kimi hadn't split his attention.
22:02He can only drain one target at a time.
22:04That's his limit.
22:04That's how you beat him.
22:05He also grabbed our tactist outside the van.
22:08Tried to drain him.
22:09Nothing happened.
22:10Why?
22:10Rank Z, remember?
22:11Nothing to drain.
22:13Hmm.
22:14I want a full background sweep on this guy.
22:16School records.
22:17Family history.
22:18The works.
22:18Something doesn't add up.
22:19I trust him.
22:20That's enough.
22:22You've known him for two days, Kimi!
22:24He's got no rank.
22:25No powers.
22:26And Vortex walked right up to his van like he knew exactly who he was looking for!
22:30Meeting's over.
22:35Sinon.
22:36Yeah?
22:36You noticed his drain pattern before we even got inside?
22:39I study people.
22:40It's what I do.
22:41And when his hand was on your wrist?
22:43You didn't flinch.
22:45You didn't panic.
22:47You were waiting to see what he'd do.
22:48Xeno.
22:50Is there something you want to tell me?
23:03Zenith League.
23:04I have a simple request.
23:06Commander Z steps forward and reveals his true identity.
23:10Publicly.
23:11In the city square.
23:12You have until dawn.
23:14Or I drain every rank A hero in this city simultaneously.
23:17Every single one.
23:21Can he actually do that?
23:24We don't know what his upper limit is.
23:26Does anyone here know who Commander Z is?
23:32Commander Z has always operated independently.
23:35His identity is classified even from us.
23:37So what do we do?
23:39We can't just let Vortex drain all of us.
23:42Some of us don't have anything to worry about.
23:44Rank Z's got no power to drain, right Xenon?
23:46Right.
23:46Lucky you.
23:49You're not sure of this.
23:51You're not sure of this.
23:55You're not sure of this.
24:03But this won the result is a violent podeļæ½ė”.
24:04They won the ultimatearse gently.
24:05Everybody bombs his entire life.
24:09Not this consistently.
24:11Not unless they're trying to.
24:21No way.
24:30Oh.
24:32Oh, that's why.
25:05He's not waiting for Dawn.
25:07Everyone, full gear now!
25:16Zeno, get me a plan.
25:19If I go out there as Commander Z, everything I built gets blown open.
25:26Everyone I've kept safe, my team, my cover, my life, gone.
25:32But if I don't...
25:34I can feel it. He's pulling!
25:37From here!
25:38Zeno, I need a plan, now!
25:42Commander Z, sir, you have to go now.
25:46If he completes the drain...
25:47I know, Alphonse.
26:02I know who Commander Z is.
26:21Don't move!
26:23Go, go, go, go!
26:24Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
26:25You
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