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00:06hello and welcome back to dream girl if you're new here i'm sheen i'm your host and today we
00:12have a very special guest i'm sure you've seen her unless you live under a rock please join me
00:17in welcoming liz hello liz hi how are you i'm good how are you good you know every time i
00:23want
00:23to say wizard liz because just that's just how i know you i feel like people they also say like
00:28lizard liz lizard the wizard that's very cool is that where the name came from how did you come up
00:35with that no the wizard liz was actually like i used to work in a restaurant as a student
00:40and i remember like i was put behind the bar because my boss was like let's put the pretty
00:46girl behind it at first i was really not good at my job but um so i was like i
00:52was working there and
00:53then we had a client that came and he he asked like for a drink and i said oh you
00:59should try this
01:00one and he said like well i would get anything that you sell me because you're so magical like
01:06your ri is magical and then i told him like well then i must be a wizard you know and
01:11i was like
01:11joking about that and i never left my mind so i was like you know when i was doing social
01:15media
01:16the wizard liz okay well i'm glad we found out the story behind the name but okay listen for me
01:23i've been following you since you started i remember the first time i watched your video and
01:27it went viral and as i was telling you beforehand because i have so many friends who are in the
01:32youtube world and i remember them saying you know we spend so much time making sure the audio quality
01:38is great the visuals are great the thumbnail is great and this girl came in and blew everyone out
01:44with the algorithm and everybody just loved you and i think it's also because of how
01:48um raw it is it almost feels like you're telling me off when i'm watching the video
01:55everyone needs therapy but i think they need therapy after my videos
02:00no no no no no you're helping but but i put up on my story asking people what would they
02:05want
02:06to hear from you right and today we're going to cover a few things from you know the relationship
02:10with yourself your relationship with your friends um with men or women in in a romantic way but to
02:17start with tell me what was for you a pivotal moment in your life that pushed you to start this
02:23whole
02:23career so a pivotal moment so basically my childhood was very bad okay like i think everyone already
02:30knows this that i was uh physically abused by my father um and i saw my mother get abused so
02:36it was
02:37like a very very traumatic childhood and it's funny like when my father decided to cheat on my mother
02:44that was like the happiest day of me and my siblings because we were like that monster is leaving our
02:49house we were so happy but it's ironic that when your abuser leaves the house and you finally have that
02:57freedom that you always craved that you start abusing yourself because that's when i developed uh bulimia
03:04anorexia and these these are all like forms of self-abuse you know and when i looked at my
03:11siblings and at myself i saw how we all handled everything differently because the issue is not
03:19the abuse it's the aftermath right it's how we feel afterwards because now we have to realize that we
03:25allowed ourselves to get treated like that and that this went on for so many years and it's very uh
03:33hurtful
03:34to realize that and then you go from all of that which you've ever known the abuse to okay what
03:40do
03:40we do now so who are we now actually because we don't know who we are without it you know
03:45we weren't
03:45allowed to explore ourselves so i feel like my life started when my father cheated on my mother
03:54it finally started and then that was the first moment in my life that i could look at myself and
03:59be like
04:00okay listen what do we do now and for me my biggest thing in life was always let me just
04:06make money let
04:07me get rich because i can like at least i cannot heal my family but i would be able to
04:13like afford
04:13a band-aid to put on top of like the wounds that my father created and i kind of felt
04:19responsible for
04:20the hurt that my family had been through i don't know why but i felt responsible so my whole life
04:26i was like
04:26okay how do i make money how do i make money and the more like i was struggling also with
04:31my ed
04:32and bulimia and when you're struggling with all these things all your energy is going towards that
04:38and that's why i tell people that are for example trying to lose weight let's say yeah i had this
04:45conversation today actually with like a woman in a store it was like she's like uh i love your body
04:51like
04:51are you on a diet like what's happening and i was like you know the moment that i stopped wanting
04:56to lose weight is when i lost it and i couldn't i like now whatever i eat i cannot gain
05:02it anymore
05:02which is actually a opposite issue that's great yeah but she i told her like because i was in the
05:09same mindset of like putting all my energy i couldn't even create anything right so i couldn't
05:13create business or anything because all my energy was going towards food i wake up i think about food
05:18i go to bed i think about food because you know why why i even feel like i got to
05:23eating disorder
05:24because when you have a whole childhood where you never felt in control that eating disorder made
05:32me feel in control of something i can control what i eat or what i don't eat and somehow i
05:37felt proud
05:37of myself right but it was never about like the way i looked because it was never skinny enough honestly
05:43i think it's a form of like slowly taking your own life i call it you know so when i
05:50when i removed the
05:52energy from the eating disorders and i was like you know what because this went on for two years like
05:57severe depression after my father left then i was like okay let's change things how can i actually
06:04change because i was so tired of blaming everyone or my circumstances and i was like liz you need to
06:10start looking at yourself because the reason why my life was like that was because of me and no one
06:15else
06:15i was abusing myself and it's like i don't have i don't have anyone to blame look the thing is
06:21like
06:21yeah i had an abusive childhood but what do i do next do i continue being a victim or take
06:27do i take
06:28my power back because the more energy i put into hating my father means the more powerful he becomes
06:35and i want that power i want to create you know what i mean so i was like it's time
06:39for me to pull all
06:40the energy back to myself and the only way you do that is by taking responsibility for your life
06:45blame gives your power away and responsibility gives it to yourself oh my goodness that was so
06:52powerful again i felt like i was just watching your youtube video i was i forgot i had to ask
06:56you
06:56questions i was like well i get so passionate when i talk i love it okay okay one thing i
07:02want to tell
07:03you is your energy is infectious right and i think you know that but i get to experience it in
07:07person
07:08and it's beautiful as you said that you know despite all the terrible things that happened
07:13to you which you didn't have a hand to play in but you've turned that into something beautiful and now
07:19you're helping everyone else around you and that's incredible and you've built such a beautiful life
07:23for yourself so you should be very proud of yourself thank you what i'm trying to say i really
07:27appreciate that but also now what would you say is any misconception that people still hold about you
07:33given what they see online i think they see a woman and um they think like oh she's a narcissist
07:41that's what i hear often or she's very toxic her mindset is very toxic and it's like i think people
07:47they don't know they don't understand what narcissism actually is and an actual narcissist
07:52wouldn't act like a narcissist they act like the nicest person that's why women stay in relationships
07:58with narcissists for so long right because they don't understand what's going on a narcissist is
08:03not someone that comes on here and says i am amazing i am mesmerizing no that's just all like
08:09that's too outward the narcissists are more closeted and very manipulative in the way they act you know
08:15and i feel like once people see me for example and i post let's say a tiktok yesterday i post
08:22i always
08:23get what i want the reason why i post this is because i want people to look at the tiktok
08:28and
08:28read it in their head for themselves but i know what it looks like to others but at the same
08:35time
08:36i think it's a good thing that people even blame me or be like she's a narcissist she's too full
08:42of
08:43herself i think it was a good impact because i think there's people watching me and thinking you know
08:49what she's so full of herself and the way she talks if she can talk like that about herself
08:54maybe i can love myself a little they they become so comfortable because i make them uncomfortable in
09:01the way that i speak you know what i mean yeah because they see this as the extreme it's like
09:04extreme yeah but somehow it make it can make them confident because like she can be that extreme
09:11maybe i can be like a little bit of that like 10 of what she's saying you know what i
09:15mean
09:15no but i love what you said about narcissistic people right and i think that's again something
09:21that a lot of people always ask me about i have also experienced it but it's crazy how however
09:27smart you are however emotionally intelligent you are as a woman especially how you get stuck
09:32in that situation and what advice do you have for people to even start to recognize that this is a
09:39toxic situation and this person might be narcissistic so i've dealt with narcissists in
09:45my life fair share um first thing is a woman especially or whoever needs to listen to their
09:54intuition i feel like women have such strong intuition it's almost like our body and our soul
10:01knows that something is wrong before it actually happens for example me i see dreams about a person
10:09that i'm not meant to be with i see dreams about like leave or i see visions like leave and
10:14i don't
10:14listen because i think like i'm crazy i'm crazy but then until something happens where i'm like oh
10:20but i knew that but i literally knew that years ago i could have prevented this but i didn't listen
10:25to
10:25myself right so intuition is very very important you're not supposed to feel drained around a person
10:30you're not even a friend you're not supposed to sit with a friend and then come home and be like
10:35oh my
10:35god like i feel so bad because a negative energy exchange has just happened right second thing is
10:43look at their actions and not at their words and i keep telling people this so i actually had this
10:49thing with like a place that i always go to for lunch okay and there's like two waitresses that work
10:55there and i absolutely love them okay so they were telling me that the place is closing down and a
11:01new
11:01owner is now taking over and their previous owner hasn't like uh given them a new contract nothing
11:08so they are losing out on two months of uh money like salary salary so then what i did was
11:16i gave them
11:16that two months of salary wow and then they were like um and then they told me like i was
11:21asking them
11:22because i want to help them with their job and then they were telling me like no but you know
11:26he's not a
11:27bad guy liz like our boss is not a bad guy like he he's really like he says it in
11:32such a way and i
11:33said uh-uh what did he do he doesn't care about you guys i care about them yeah i care
11:39about them and
11:39they're not they're not working for me so it's like he should care about you guys you take care of
11:44the
11:44people that you work for or that are in your life this is not normal so i'm like don't listen
11:49to what
11:49he's saying look at what he's doing and so many women because we get so sensitive and we love to
11:57hear things no look at the way he's treating you if he's abusive but tomorrow he tells you he loves
12:03you he's abusive he doesn't love you someone that loves you wouldn't abuse you you know and i i think
12:10like once you start to just look at people for who they are you know when people become mesmerizing
12:16when you put your energy into them so right now if i look at you i find you amazing okay
12:21i find you
12:22mesmerizing but it's because we are exchanging our energy right now but what if like for example i had
12:28this actually with a previous relationship of mine tell me so i would think like look i've never been
12:35the person to go for looks so i don't i don't care okay the way you look i never really
12:39cared yeah i care
12:40more about intelligence and the way you are yeah but the more the relationship developed i almost had
12:47like rose colored glasses on and i found that whoa this person can manifest so well whoa this person
12:52has become so successful all these things and i was like oh this this person is amazing and even i
12:59thought like oh because of him i must be amazing i started giving him all the credit right the minute
13:05i broke
13:05up with him and i was like you know i'm done and i called all my energy back to me
13:10and i was like this
13:11is gonna end i saw him again and i was shocked i was like there is no way i was
13:17with this person
13:18no i literally saw him for the way he actually looked yeah it's like my friends had been telling
13:23me liz there's no way because he was not a good person either you know that's the main problem but
13:27i was
13:27like i'm my energy made him so magical to me and the same way like all the things that i
13:34thought
13:34like he's so successful he's so good at manifesting it stopped when i removed my energy so a lot of
13:40people are dating people and they put them on a pedestal but it's all because of your energy
13:45they're like a lot of women for example men become more good looking more successful because they're
13:50with that woman and then the woman starts to think like oh he's too good for me oh he's the
13:57honey that's your energy realize it you know no you know i actually had the exact same conversation
14:03with a friend of mine where i was telling her that i'm missing this guy who used to be in
14:07my life
14:07and she was like but think about it when you say he was funny it was you who was actually
14:12funny all
14:12the things that you think you miss about him was just you being part of his life that made him
14:16funny
14:17like that or make him interesting make him uh as you said dress better or have more intellectual
14:23interest and you're like that's so true like it is because of us together but without me he doesn't
14:29have all the things that i think he does yeah so it's crazy that a lot of us you know
14:33this is what
14:34i love about women talking to each other as well right because i feel like we're all so different
14:39and so unique by the same time we have such similar life experiences we do which is crazy i can't
14:46like
14:47the way you were describing this whole scenario especially that moment of clarity when you immediately
14:52once that clarity hits there's no going back the ick will remain you're like there's no way
14:59like seeing your ex-partner the way your friends saw him i never want to see that again
15:06the disappointment you feel i was like there's no way you're like wait who was it who liked this guy
15:12i was like there must have been magic on me there's no way it wasn't me it wasn't that was
15:18that was not
15:18it wasn't me i wasn't a spell it's okay but okay now going back to a little bit around the
15:24same
15:24topic so another question we got a lot of is now that we're on the topic of men and dating
15:30is you
15:31know nowadays i don't know if it's the way society is evolving or the changes in gender roles and
15:38traditional roles but now you see a lot of women are very successful right women are becoming more and
15:43more independent and very financially independent and therefore successful and you get these women
15:48these what you would term like high value which i don't really like high value women are the ones
15:53struggling to find a partner why do you think that is i think because um a lot of men are
15:58insecure
15:59and a lot of men take their value from being successful so when you take that away and you
16:05have a woman that is more successful for than you that becomes a competition for them you know and i
16:11think
16:11that's actually sad because i think people don't teach men to like for example be more in touch with
16:18their emotions develop other skills than just making money because then they can also get their value from
16:24those things but right now because they put men on such a pedestal for so long and they just poured
16:32into young men and whatever and women were just the house makers right because they made that such a big
16:38thing now you're sitting with all these men yeah they they just know okay i'll get my value if i'm
16:43successful if i'm successful i'm a good man no like look at your morals who like who are you as
16:49a person
16:49get to know yourself better and that's how you build that confidence a confident man will not get
16:54intimidated by a successful woman never ever ever but there's just not enough confident men
16:59no and even you know when you look at masculinity so that's one question we got for you actually from
17:04my audience which was you know there's kind of like a rise in like soft masculinity you know where
17:11i don't know you must have seen all of these funny reels where you know it's like men want the
17:15princess
17:15treatment now they they don't want to be the first one to text they don't want to be the one
17:20to pay the
17:21whole 50 50 situation that is coming up but do you think that is also causing an issue with men
17:27just
17:28like understanding their role and their position in society now i think men have always gotten the
17:33princess treatment always i think there has never been another time the amount of standards men have
17:40for women is insane okay but the minute you have a woman that says like hey provide you know like
17:47take care of me it's like no you're a goldiger how dare you say that but how many men would
17:52date
17:53an unattractive woman exactly they wouldn't they just simply wouldn't okay because they have that
17:58standard if you're unattractive i don't want to date you but once a woman has a standard and it's like
18:03if you're a broke guy and with broke guys i don't mean men that are poor no i mean men
18:08that don't
18:09know how to create abundance and that the that's a big big issue see for example for me a broke
18:16man
18:16how i uh classified is like my dad my dad refused to work he doesn't want to work he doesn't
18:23want to
18:23figure out how to work he made my mom work her whole life and she was taking care of him
18:27okay he
18:28didn't respect himself and he didn't respect my mother it was just not in balance at all and my
18:33mom had to be hyper masculine to make up for the lack of masculine energy in the house right now
18:41when you have that a person that doesn't know how to be abundant that's a broke guy okay it doesn't
18:47matter how much money he makes as long as he's trying that's an abundant man exactly because a lot
18:53of people they especially women they think like oh i just need a rich man i've dated a very wealthy
18:59guy probably the wealthiest guy i've ever dated he was not generous at all brokey yeah so that's a
19:05broke man because what what do i have with you you're showing me every day how much money you're
19:09making but what do i have with it what do i care how much money you make you know so
19:16it's like um
19:18that's like just the difference like when a man doesn't know how to be abundant that's the big
19:23issue so men wanting the princess even i think they always had that right so it's like they always had
19:29a standard for a woman they always had like you have to behave like this and blah blah and even
19:34like
19:34before when women were supposed to be house makers there were so many standards you're supposed to
19:39cook you're supposed to clean you're supposed to take care of the kids and look good on top of that
19:43and if you don't i'm gonna cheat on you and if you do i'm gonna cheat on you so it's
19:47like women had
19:47to accept that but then you had women for example that have a platform like me that came on and
19:53were
19:53like stop accepting it and it's like let's have standards you know let's have standards as a
19:58collective and because of that yeah you have what you have right now which is very successful women
20:03because they started believing in themselves instead of a man and chasing what they want and being who
20:10they want to be instead of chasing a man and like taking their value from being with a man
20:16because that's also a huge issue that women are facing you know they think like oh my god if i'm
20:21not married by this age or if i don't have children then i failed as a woman but who said
20:26that society
20:27your parents your culture who said that who set that standard for women who said that if a woman has
20:34her period she's dirty she that like that's dirty who said all these things if men could get their
20:40period and could get pregnant we would not be able to meet their standards the they would have standards
20:46through the roof the like anything that even is like um like tampons all these things it would be
20:52free it would be free yeah free and they would have made like a medic medicine or something to solve
20:57like cramps yes to help them massage stools at work yeah days off days off paid yes no for sure
21:08women would not be able to meet their standards no no and that's the thing i'm so glad you touched
21:13on
21:14this because this this has come up many times in conversations with my guests on the podcast and even
21:19with my friends i keep seeing this because now that women are getting in their mid 30s and late 30s
21:26they're starting to worry and all of these friends that i have or even guests that i've met one of
21:31them even said on the podcast that you know i feel like i have the villa that i always wanted
21:36i have my
21:36cars i have my six-figure business and i sit in my house alone and now i'm thinking did i
21:42go wrong
21:43should i have focused on finding a husband should i have focused on having kids younger because that's
21:48when you are at your peak on the sexual market value if you want to call it that and now
21:54she's like
21:55now what do i do and now i see this kind of like i don't know how to explain it
21:59other than
22:00passive depression that is rampant around where you see all these successful women who at the end
22:06of the day come home to a to like a quiet apartment and they are sad and they feel like
22:11they went wrong somewhere what would you say to these people i think that the grass is always greener on
22:18the other side i know that there's a lot of married women that wish they could come home to
22:22an empty house i swear like they have glamorized having children and married so much and people
22:29don't see the behind the scenes they always like show you the pretty picture but all the work that
22:35is behind the scenes all the arguments all the compromises all the things that cheating that
22:41happens and then you have to think oh my god do i want to stay married because i don't want
22:45to lose
22:45face in under you know in front of other people so i just stay married with a cheating husband
22:49and i just look nice in front of everyone and then someone looks at them and think oh i wish
22:53i had that
22:54no you don't you don't know what's going on in someone's house behind closed doors you know my
22:59parents like everyone that knew them they thought like oh father's a great guy such an amazing man such
23:06a religious man they would say you know behind closed doors that was literally the devil himself you know
23:11you never know what is going on so i would say never glamorize something if i think right now about
23:16right now about having children and a husband that's a huge responsibility huge i i rather right now in
23:23this position of my life have my business make my own money and be independent and whoever comes into my
23:31life they can add to it but i'm not thinking like let me right now start a family because i
23:36know that will
23:37take so much of my time and energy into the family you know if i want to raise it in
23:43a way that i would
23:44want which is with full attention and everything so it all depends on like do you really want that
23:50or do you want to create a perfect picture for society because we have to really go back to
23:58the beliefs that we have because why do we have that because it's also it's not only women it's the
24:02same
24:02with men right if you don't get married as a man oh you're not a man you're not you have
24:07to you're
24:08not a father oh my god you're already late 30s you're not a father it's like why push things upon
24:12people some people don't want that that's okay some people do then yeah you find a way you date around
24:20you see does this match with me but don't do it because you feel like you're losing time because i
24:26feel
24:26like everything in life comes at the right time at divine timing when it's when it's meant for you
24:32when something is not meant for you it will not happen no matter what you do when something is
24:38meant for you no one can take that from you ever it will come in like in the most miraculous
24:44ways it
24:45will come so just let it go women need to start letting stuff go that tell me how it is
24:51no that is
24:52the biggest thing look right before this was literally a month ago like one and one and a half
24:58months ago i was so obsessed with the outcome i became very masculine because i like i didn't have
25:05like anyone supporting me so i was like i felt like i was completely alone okay so i was like
25:09oh my god
25:09i need to have this i need to have this like i need to figure something out and i was
25:12going crazy
25:14so i was like focused so much on my career and i was just i was literally losing it okay
25:18and then
25:20i went back home because mentally i was not doing well so i went back home to my mom
25:25and uh i went home and then the second day i arrived i went to walk in nature and i
25:30always tell
25:31people go walk in nature because nature is healing right um the trees the plants all these things these
25:38are living beings i even tell people like put your back or your hands against a tree it will remove
25:45any energy that's not serving you because that's how how we work with each other but people don't
25:51know these things or they don't want to try these things so they don't get like really further in
25:55life anyway so i went and i walked in nature and i started talking to god and i always used
26:01to do this
26:01thing a lot like especially in the beginning of my career like talking to god and having conversations
26:05like he's my best friend oh my god i see the same thing you know we're gonna talk about yeah
26:10keep
26:10going sorry so then i was like i was walking in nature and i started talking to him and i
26:14said
26:15um god like uh i can't take this anymore like not like this i i'm like i want to do
26:20what i have to do
26:21on this earth and complete my mission but not like this not on my own and i feel very bad
26:26and i i said
26:28like uh i don't want to live anymore and that was really my mental state like i don't want to
26:32be here
26:32anymore but i'm not going to do it myself so you do it okay you handle it you please take
26:37my life
26:37so i was like um i said that and then all of a sudden i was walking i heard like
26:42wanting nothing
26:44gives you everything i heard that sentence in my head and then i kept walking and i started repeating
26:49it out loud i was like wanting nothing gives you everything and then i understood wanting nothing
26:55gives you everything i was too focused on i need to have this i need to have fun i need
27:03to have work
27:03i need to have this i need to be bigger and bigger and i was too focused on them so
27:08what i realized was
27:09if i just let go of i don't want anything anymore like you handle it here give it to god
27:14you handle
27:15it you know when i did that everything i've ever wanted came and it came so fast like these past
27:23one
27:23and a half months my life has changed 360 i've probably never been happier than i am right now
27:29yeah which is crazy but it was the minute i just let it go i was like i don't care
27:35anymore and you
27:36know this is you can see it for example and you know why this is also the thing when you
27:41let something
27:41go you take your power back you take your energy from that thing back now when you are too focused
27:47on
27:48things for example let's say you're obsessing over an ex okay the minute you stop wanting that ex
27:53all of a sudden he texts you all of a sudden he calls you he's now obsessed with you why
27:57you took your
27:58energy back the minute you take back your energy from all these things and you are now whole by
28:04yourself those things become attracted to you and they want to be with you instead of you wanting to
28:10be with them because nothing likes desperation desperation is a repulsive energy when you are
28:17desperate you have a lack mindset you don't believe that this earth is abundant and this earth is very
28:22abundant god gave us everything this is another thing that people always tell me like oh how dare you
28:27you're asking for too much oh why do you want these things baba but there's billionaires on this
28:32earth like multiply multiple billionaires yeah why can i not have even 10 of what they have what does it
28:38matter money is is a is an abundant source as well you know money gives you freedom that's the only
28:43reason why i ever wanted money for freedom because i can go where i want i can do what i
28:47want i can help
28:48people in a way that i want right so if that is on earth why can i not have it
28:55if god made this earth so
28:57abundant anything that is on this earth i can have and i will get whenever i think to myself okay
29:03i want
29:04that but i just want it and i don't focus on it like in a desperate way but i know
29:09i have a goal in the
29:10back of my mind but i'm not desperate for it right that's when it comes oh wow okay i love
29:17that also
29:18you know what you said about um what is meant for you cannot miss you and what if it's not
29:23meant for
29:23you however hard you try you can't get it i remember um i go by this thing that i saw
29:29some
29:29some time ago and it's really hard to remind myself of it but i try you know when they tell
29:34you that
29:35um god will never say no to you god only has three answers either it's yes not now or i
29:42have
29:42something better so it's kind of like remembering that whatever you're not getting in life is because
29:47that's not the right thing and again it's a very freeing thought right it's like there's a bigger
29:53picture there's divine intervention there's no need to worry whatever is meant for you will find you
29:57um but i like what you talked about in terms of letting go and i think overthinking is a huge
30:03thing
30:03that our generation does we carry it with us everywhere we keep trying to plan everything
30:08and i think we didn't even learn from covid how overnight we were all in our houses nobody planned
30:14that everyone's life turned upside down and i think we still try to overthink and that overthinking
30:21kind of like takes away the joy of the present takes away the joy of you being grateful and i
30:26think
30:26gratitude is also something we don't practice a lot of but now that we are on this topic i want
30:31to ask you
30:32i feel like all of this the overthinking the over analyzing holding on to things comes a lot of
30:38times from a place of lack of confidence of self-love because people don't really understand the
30:43difference between self-love and being selfish we always assume that we should not take up space we
30:49should not talk about ourselves about our successes so what like magical tip do you have for people in
30:56terms of how to build that confidence muscle so basically i like i wanted to touch on the thing
31:02where you said like uh they call self-love selfish yeah exactly so in terms of that if you look
31:09at
31:10the way children have been raised it's always care for others do things for others then you're a good
31:15person no one ever tells you to take care of yourself look after yourself oh you can tell yourself
31:21you're beautiful who tells you that no one tells that because then you're vain then you're then
31:26you're selfish right now if you look at it in a in a broader picture who does this benefit the
31:33people
31:33in power it benefits them that you don't believe in yourself right because if we have all these people
31:39that believe in themselves how can you control them you cannot control people if i was let's say
31:44a person in power and i was like a bad person or i thought like i just want to control
31:49people
31:49i would make them fear everything i would tell them like if you do anything you'll go straight
31:54to hell i would tell that i would tell them like um care for others if you care about yourself
31:59oh
31:59you're a bad person i would tell these things these are very smart and manipulative things but you
32:04also have to realize it's manipulative you know you a lot of people also raise their children
32:09to not believe in themselves they don't even realize they do it but they do it because they
32:13tell like oh if you did something for your sister oh then you're a good boy good girl you did
32:19a good
32:19job if you did something for your classmate or friend then you're a good person if you did
32:23something for yourself no one no one applauds you for that no one says like oh wow so that's when
32:28the confidence you build it by applauding yourself for yourself looking yourself in the mirror and say
32:34wow oh my god you got that new job oh you're amazing oh my god you're such a goddess talk
32:40to yourself
32:40that way because it's so easy for everyone to talk about their friends like that to talk about the people
32:46that we love but then we neglect ourselves the most which you are supposed to love yourself the
32:52most because when you love yourself you are love and you create love around you a person that doesn't
32:59love themselves doesn't go out and is happy with everyone else that's just not it doesn't happen
33:05you know so misery creates more misery so you have to take care first of like okay how do i
33:11feel
33:12how do i want to feel how can i do that and i think a big thing with confidence is
33:16as well like
33:17create skills become good at something because a lot of people they don't know how to do anything
33:22they don't want to learn anything and they're just blaming like oh i'm just insecure if you're
33:27just insecure create something okay then you can be confident about something and then that translates
33:35to your inner confidence and the same way people say like oh yeah but i'm just ugly look at ways
33:40to
33:40become more beautiful no but you can change yourself no like and but a lot of times they say
33:45like oh you should also just accept yourself i don't feel like that's that's most the case if i just
33:52accepted myself i would still be in my bedroom with my mom sitting there crying if i just accept
33:58myself no i had to change things and you have to be honest with yourself sometimes you are the devil
34:03that you're trying to blame because everyone wants to say oh my life is bad because of this
34:07there must have been some magic in my life that someone did no honey how are you acting how who
34:13are you allowing around you because that is also a big thing for confidence because it's like
34:17you have bad friends you have like a bad partner that you're constantly allowing to abuse you to talk
34:24down on you you're abusing yourself and you have to be honest with yourself once you set that boundary
34:29of like you're not going to treat me like that and you actually walk away watch how your confidence
34:34will skyrocket because you made that decision to walk away when someone tells you like no you
34:40shouldn't be saying anything like for example i grew up with like my father saying um a woman should
34:45never speak a woman should never have a voice i feel my most confident now when i speak because i
34:51made
34:52that decision that my voice needs to be heard right and that's the thing to be proud of so create
34:58things for yourself that you can be proud of even helping someone out like giving them something
35:04that's something to be proud of you did something good and then applaud yourself for it you studied
35:08you had a great you had a great test or whatever result that you had amazing be proud of yourself
35:14you know don't wait for other people to to sit there and clap for you clap for yourself first
35:22i love that and you know um i agree with you i think is the worst advice we can give
35:27to people is
35:27just be who you are because i think we can be a better version of who we are and that's
35:32just the
35:32starting point and who we are is as you said beautifully is a result of what we grew up with
35:38what we absorbed growing up the society everything and we need to shed these weights they're dead weight
35:44we need to shed them so we can become truly who we are meant to be and also i just
35:49want to touch on
35:50you talked about self-love and how if we don't love ourselves we can't love people around us which
35:54is so true because you know even in the ads in the airplanes where they show you that you need
35:59to put
35:59your mask first and then help people around because what's the point if you just help everyone
36:04around and then that's it you're gone that's not how it works and again you've touched on that super
36:09super nicely but um another thing i want to ask you you know so this is a term i don't
36:15like as well
36:16which is called imposter syndrome you know a lot of people blame whatever they feel or the fact that
36:22they're not trying new things not stepping out of their comfort zone on feeling like an imposter
36:26and that they don't belong and they can't do it what do you think about that you know i think
36:33in life you just have to do things and then it becomes so it's like this glass right here someone
36:40imagined it and then they created it right so if you imagine yourself as a version that you want to
36:47be
36:47and you start acting like it that's when it comes into the physical realm but it all starts here
36:52so no matter who you are right now it's who you are telling yourself that you are yeah it's who
36:59your parents told you that you are it's who society told you how you have to act and how you
37:03have to be
37:05so who you are or like just be who you are it doesn't make sense because who are we at
37:09the end of the day
37:10i think we are just all souls on earth and we don't know how to behave as humans we're just
37:15waiting
37:15to return back home but we're here like okay what is this guys you know but it's nice then i
37:21see life
37:22as a video game i see life as like okay i can be whoever i want to be because it
37:26doesn't matter at
37:26the end of the day i will never be who i fully am because it will always be constructed by
37:31things
37:32around me or people around me because that's how we just are we're a soul not a human okay we're
37:37just
37:37here experiencing life on earth so once you accept that and you think like what does feel most
37:44comfortable for me who would i like to be who would i be happy if i was this person then
37:49you start
37:49acting like it you start acting like that person how would they act how would they dress what would
37:54they accept what would they not accept what are their daily habits and once you do something long
38:00enough it becomes your life right you do it something over if you're used to like going to gym every
38:06morning you wake up you'll have a fit body because you're just always at the gym and it's not like
38:11a
38:12practice that you always do right so you just start to you cannot be an imposter when you understand
38:18that everything starts in your mind first that's just how life is even diseases that we have physical
38:25diseases that we create start first in the mind a lot of people they get like crazy illnesses because
38:30trauma is stuck yeah a lot of stress and all these things but these are emotions it's all emotions
38:37before it comes into the physical so once you understand that how can you be an imposter because it
38:42just it starts here you know it's everything you know they say the same thing about being delusional
38:47they say oh no you should not be delusional we're delusional every single day every day we're
38:53delusional we wake up thinking we will not die no one is waking up today i'm gonna die today i
38:59will die
38:59no no one everyone believes that they will live on until it's your time of course you know what i
39:05mean
39:05so you can you so you can be delusional every day in life but not about the thing that you
39:10want
39:10that's like too far right no like once you understand this mind creates your whole whole
39:16life whole life once you change the mind and once you change the things that you think or or you
39:22set
39:22a goal for yourself in like this is the person that i want to be this is who i want
39:26to show up as in this
39:28human body yeah because it's like a game then that's who you become that's who you become that's how
39:36people will treat you that's how your surroundings will change that's how you will enter rooms that
39:41before you couldn't enter because now you're just unlocking a new character of yourself it's fun
39:47oh my god yeah it's like a new level yeah it's like a new level oh i like that analogy
39:52but okay
39:53you also touched on this and before i forget because your brain is moving so fast and i'm trying to
39:58keep
39:58up it's too fast every time you say something i make a mental note i want to ask her this
40:03and then
40:03we've reached 10 later but you know you talked about how even your surroundings right and the
40:09people around you make a big difference um there's this whole saying that you are the average of the
40:15five people you spend most time with but one thing i have experienced and i'm sure you have given how
40:21how quickly your life changed as well is that a lot of people you outgrow friends especially who were
40:27there in very good times and i've been very surprised to see the how some friendships evolved
40:33and some of them stayed very true with me throughout but some people who were there in the trenches kind
40:39of like rooting for me hoping it will happen but then when it happens they're not that happy about it
40:44and they don't celebrate your wins how do you deal with that well you know it's very logical that that
40:50happens because you're uncomfortable now yeah they don't want to be around you it becomes uncomfortable
40:55because now it's like you were in the same position as them once right and you made it out
41:02so now that means these people have to look at themselves and only can blame themselves now they cannot
41:08blame society they cannot blame the the place they grew up in or whatever they cannot blame outside
41:13forces because you did it so it's like oh so i could do it too but i didn't and that
41:19eats away at them
41:20and then jealousy gets created you know i think jealousy is a good emotion why because it shows you
41:26what you want if someone is jealous of me they just want what i have or they what they think
41:32i have
41:32right what the glamorized version of that is but that's good so now you have a goal take that jealousy
41:38transmute that jealous energy into creating that because i'm not sitting here telling i'm better than you
41:44i'm sitting here you can do the same thing you know i posted something yesterday on my tiktok
41:49and um it said like uh it was like i get anything i want you know like an affirmation and
41:55someone
41:55commented like yeah because you're a millionaire and i'm like but i came from nothing though yeah i
42:00was a millionaire a few years ago i came from nothing and i i took care of my family's financial
42:06situation i built everyone and i made even because i like uh became successful my family believes in
42:13themselves now and they think like oh we can do whatever we want because liz did it right so it's
42:18like don't look at my success and be like oh but you're here now three years ago i was just
42:24like you
42:24girl just like you literally yeah so it's like yeah it's the same thing like take that jealousy
42:30and start to look at okay how can i actually get what they want if you're jealous of beauty if
42:35you're
42:35jealous of whatever that's just what you want it's an indicator for what you want because it's not
42:40about that person it's every life everything in life what we experience is about ourselves
42:45we're thinking from our perspective always so anything even someone says to you it's like a
42:50projection of how they feel right it's not about you so when you realize like you know what it's not
42:56really about me but i hope you get what you want if someone is jealous of me i i i
43:02send them like
43:02love and i say i hope you get there because that's what you want right otherwise why are you jealous
43:07i'm not jealous of um what's it called the people that climb the mountains because i don't want to
43:13climb that mountain but i bet there's some people jealous that someone climbed that mountain yeah
43:18that's what they want it's good once you take that energy instead of making it something negative
43:24transmute it people create the biggest art when they're sad when they're angry when they're jealous they
43:31create crazy art music everything like uh art pieces they create everything out of it do it
43:38do the same thing oh uh yeah definitely i think the main message is be inspired instead of like being
43:45jealous right see it as a possibility demonize the emotion no because everyone this is the issue with
43:50jealousy people think i'm jealous i'm a bad person now you're not you just want what they want then
43:56okay figure out how can i get there if your friends were in the same situation and you could get
44:01there
44:01they can get there too 100 they can get there too but just have to think okay how can i
44:06do what she did
44:06you know no absolutely but you know what i like about you liz is how you are so disconnected from
44:14whatever is petty you know you're just you you've risen above and you're just like this is i i get
44:21the human nature behind it i see where it comes from you are very good at recognizing what matters
44:27and what doesn't and you you're good at choosing your battles how did you get to that level of being
44:32like you know what i'm not gonna sweat the small stuff you know uh thank you by the way and
44:38then also
44:39i feel like ever since i was young i had that quality so i didn't have time to be a
44:43child i had to grow up
44:44very fast so i was like an adult since i was young i was like a mother to my mother
44:48okay so because of that
44:50whenever i would like speak or anything my mom used to call me like a lawyer she's like you defend
44:55anyone you see their perspective from any person you see a perspective okay which is not always a good
45:01thing but i do i understand why someone did what they did i can get into their shoes and i
45:07can almost
45:08feel what they felt when they did that do i accept certain behaviors even though i understand no
45:15i can understand that what you did was wrong but you also have to understand that i will put
45:20my boundary here and be like you won't do that to me ever again right so that's how i operate
45:25i'm
45:26like i can understand i can have empathy with you i can feel bad for you and think like i'm
45:31happy i'm
45:31not in your position i'm happy i don't wake up a hater i'm happy that i think god the biggest
45:37curse
45:37he gave was that making someone a hater like imagine waking up thinking about how many people you hate
45:44or thinking about let's make him miserable her miserable that's sad so i'm like thank god that
45:50i'm not that person but i can have empathy for you but doesn't mean that you have to be in
45:55my life
45:56though it doesn't mean that i have to and i feel like giving them attention or feeding into it or
46:01let's
46:01say reacting to these things puts them in my life in my reality but it's like you don't exist in
46:07my world
46:08if i don't let you exist in it and that's it i have that power so i don't let you
46:13exist if i don't
46:14like you you know what i mean absolutely boundaries right yeah very important very important but i mean
46:20i could speak to you for hours but we're running out of time for hours thank you so what would
46:25you say
46:26is a parting message or any advice that you would want to give to anyone listening to you today
46:32i would say like really start believing in yourself and start believing in god i think
46:38to believe in god is to believe in yourself i think we don't ask god for enough things and we
46:43don't ask for big enough things you have to ask for the small stuff and the big stuff and i
46:47feel like
46:48once you have like lately i've been even closer to god and i feel like the closer you are to
46:53god
46:54the higher your vibration raises and that's how also the negative things and the lower vibrational
47:00things cannot affect you because you're not on that vibe you know what i mean so i think believe
47:06in yourself believe that anything you want can happen and will happen no matter how long it takes
47:12it will happen it just will and you have to have that belief but don't become obsessed with it don't
47:17become obsessed when you know when people become obsessed with certain things that's when they start
47:22to lose the connection to themselves when you become obsessed with money you become obsessed with fame
47:26you become obsessed with relationships you start to lose yourself always keep that connection with
47:31yourself and i think one of the truest way of keeping that connection with yourself is keeping
47:36a connection with god i love that thank you so much liz for being here today thank you so much
47:40for having
47:41me no this was incredible and i wish you only the best and i can't wait to see how many
47:47more
47:47leaps and bounds you take online and with everything you do thank you for helping all of us
47:51and thank you for this therapy session thank you so much for having me i really appreciate you of course
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