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Basil plans a surprise anniversary party for Sybil but, thinking he's forgotten it again, she walks out just before the guests arrive.
Basil plans a surprise anniversary party for Sybil but, thinking he's forgotten it again, she walks out just before the guests arrive.
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Short filmTranscript
00:10The End
00:33I mean, it's only a hundred.
00:35Yeah, nothing to them.
00:36And I said I'd pay it back in six weeks.
00:38Well, knock it off your wages.
00:40And she said it would be all right.
00:42Oh?
00:43I mean, if he'd said no three weeks ago when I asked him, I could have got the money somewhere
00:47else.
00:48Ask him this morning.
00:49But I've asked him three times. It's embarrassing.
00:52Well, tell him, sir, if he won't let you have it, you'll go.
00:54I've got to have it this weekend.
00:57Well, ask him.
00:58I mean, me and you practically run the bleeding place for him.
01:02Ah, Polly, your painting's brushes.
01:05Thank you, Mother.
01:06Here, and the change is 44p.
01:10Ah, what's all that?
01:12Oh, I make a paella.
01:14A surprise tonight.
01:16My mother's recipe is...
01:18But does Terry know?
01:20Oh, perhaps Mr. Fawlty say?
01:30Anything wrong?
01:32Nothing you could do anything about, thank you, Polly.
01:35Are you sure?
01:36Our 15th wedding anniversary today.
01:40Guess who's forgotten?
01:41Oh, no.
01:43I didn't think he'd forget this year.
01:46Not after what happened when he forgot last year.
01:50I shouldn't be so thin-skinned about it.
01:53I'm just cursed with a sensitive nature, I'm afraid.
01:58See, oh, that's the way I am.
01:59I suppose we all have our cross to bear.
02:07Do you know what poem that's based on, Polly?
02:10No.
02:11Oh, to joy.
02:12Hello, dear.
02:14Oh, well, Polly, you won't forget to put some more splits in the bar, would you?
02:17No, I don't, lady.
02:18I don't expect Polly will forget, Basil.
02:21No, just reminding her, dear.
02:22Oh, were you?
02:23Well, I thought so, yes.
02:24Really?
02:24Well, it sounded like it to me.
02:26You don't have to worry about Polly forgetting anything important, Basil.
02:29Don't I?
02:30No, you don't.
02:30Oh, good, how splendid.
02:32No, she doesn't forget things.
02:34Doesn't she?
02:35Well, can you remember the last time she did?
02:38No, I can't, but then my memory isn't very good.
02:41You can say that again.
02:43Can I do that?
02:44Oh, thank you.
02:45Ahem.
02:47I've forgotten what it was.
02:50Well, don't worry, Basil, provided you can remember the things that matter to you.
02:57Do I detect the smell of burning martyr?
03:01Mr. Dalton, it's your anniversary.
03:04Hmm, but don't let on.
03:06What?
03:07I'm pretending I've forgotten.
03:08Well, I forgot last year and I got flayed alive for it, so we got some friends arriving in about
03:12ten minutes for a surprise drinks party.
03:15Manuel's making a special paella for tonight.
03:18Got some champagne, but don't tell her I've remembered yet.
03:20Let's let her have a bit of a fume.
03:24Wouldn't it be simpler to boil her in oil?
03:27Yes, but not as economical.
03:30Ah, Mr. Fawlty, what time for the paella?
03:33Ah, er, nine o'clock, but, er, secret, hmm?
03:36Ah, I see.
03:38Ah, Mr. Fawlty.
03:39Hmm?
03:40Have you decided about the car?
03:42The car?
03:43The money for the car.
03:45Ah, I spoke to Mrs. Fawlty and she said it was all right.
03:48Yes, I don't think she quite understands the cash flow situation, vis-à-vis the frozen acid.
03:52But it's only a hundred.
03:54Yes, well...
03:54I thought I'd pay you back in six weeks.
03:56Let me think about it, hmm?
03:57But I've got to know, this weekend they won't hold it any longer.
04:00This week?
04:00Oh, well, you should have told me.
04:03I told you three weeks ago.
04:05Look, look, it's my anniversary, right?
04:07I've got some friends arriving in a few minutes.
04:08We'll discuss it later.
04:10Oh, and, er, when they get here, er, give me a hand with a coat and some drinks, will you?
04:13I scratch your back, you scratch mine, eh?
04:16What's this, then?
04:18Oh, good morning, Mr. Fawlty.
04:20Good morning, Mr. Fawlty.
04:22Good morning, ladies.
04:25Could I have a word with you, Basil?
04:27Er, could it wait just a few minutes, dear?
04:30No.
04:35Is everything all right, dear?
04:37You seem just a little bit tense.
04:40Do you know what date is today, Basil?
04:43Er, it's the 16th today, dear.
04:46It's the 17th, Basil.
04:48No, no, it's the 16th of April.
04:50It's the 17th, Basil.
04:53Well, we'll soon settle this, sir.
04:58Oh, yes, you are right.
05:00The 17th of April.
05:01Well, well, well.
05:03Does that stir any memories in you, Basil?
05:07Memories?
05:11Agincourt?
05:17What anniversary of the Battle of Agincourt?
05:22Trafalgar?
05:24Cressy?
05:25Poitiers?
05:26Yom Kippur?
05:28Mr. Fawlty?
05:30Manuel says he's cooking a paella for you.
05:33Shh.
05:34Yes, for Mrs. Fawlty.
05:35Anniversary.
05:35I can do paella, you know.
05:37Yes, I know.
05:38I have been to catering school.
05:40Oh, yes, I know.
05:40But he is Spanish, you know.
05:41And I thought it'd be rather nice to...
05:43Dispacho, chicken Andalus, eggplant Espanol, Franco fritters.
05:47I can do it, you know.
05:48Yes, of course you can.
05:49But he's been wanting to do it ever since he got here.
05:51So I thought it'd be rather nice, you know, just tonight to give it the chance.
06:00I don't want to cause trouble, Mr. Fawlty.
06:03Yes, you do.
06:04Mr. Fawlty.
06:05Now, don't you start.
06:06I don't want an argument.
06:07No, no, no, please.
06:07Now, be quiet.
06:09I told him I want you to do it.
06:11No, no, no.
06:11Mrs. Fawlty, she go.
06:13What?
06:14She leave.
06:15She leave.
06:15She go out.
06:17What?
06:20Sybil!
06:23No, Sybil!
06:24Sybil!
06:25Sybil!
06:25No, no, no, no.
06:26They really said it.
06:27I remember Sybil.
06:29There's a party, Sybil.
06:30I'm sorry.
06:31I'm sorry.
06:32I don't know.
06:34I don't know.
06:34I don't know.
06:35I don't know.
06:35I don't know.
06:36I don't know.
06:50Everything all right?
06:53Bit of a bump.
06:55Just smoothing it out.
06:59Oh, not at all.
07:01Um, come on in.
07:15What do I say?
07:17What am I going to say?
07:18Oh, say she's, uh, um...
07:20She's, uh, um.
07:21Oh, brilliant.
07:22Problem solved.
07:22She's, uh, um.
07:24It's surprise party.
07:26Yes?
07:26She know here.
07:27Right.
07:27That is surprise.
07:32Hello, Bas.
07:33Say she's ill.
07:34She's ill.
07:35What?
07:35She's ill.
07:36Sybil.
07:36How are you?
07:37What would you like to drink?
07:38Sybil.
07:39Yes.
07:39Oh, dear.
07:40What's the matter?
07:41Did you hear that?
07:42I said Sybil.
07:44Yes.
07:45Oh, do you got it?
07:46No, no, no.
07:46I'm fine.
07:47No, no, no.
07:48Well, I call her...
07:49I call her Syb, right?
07:51So Sybil.
07:53Sybil.
07:53Baswell.
07:54Ha, ha, ha, ha.
07:56Manuel.
07:59What's the matter, Basil?
08:01What have you done to her, eh, Baz?
08:03Roger.
08:04Oh, she knows my name.
08:05She's been learning it all night.
08:07What's the matter, Basil?
08:08Nothing.
08:10Nothing.
08:11For Sybil.
08:12Oh, for Sybil.
08:13Uh, quite a bit, actually.
08:15Oh, dear.
08:16No, no, she's fine.
08:17She's absolutely fine.
08:18Well, I mean, she's been in Benville.
08:20But she'll live.
08:21That's what counts as all right, doesn't it?
08:22Well, I'll pop up and see her.
08:24Oh, do you not want to bother with that?
08:25Come on through.
08:26Have a drink.
08:26No, no, go on.
08:27Let's see.
08:28What a minute.
08:28No, no, Alice.
08:29Yes?
08:29I wouldn't, actually.
08:30Let him have a matter, old boy.
08:32No, no, I mustn't.
08:33Oh, but she's up there on her own.
08:35I'm sure she'd like a little company.
08:37Uh-uh.
08:37I know I would.
08:38Well, you wouldn't if you look like her.
08:40Why?
08:40You know, she's very swollen up.
08:42You know, she looks very...
08:43You know what Sybil's like about her appearance.
08:45Oh, don't be silly, Basil.
08:47She won't mind me seeing her.
08:49Oh, she would.
08:49I think she would.
08:52But they're all on her own.
08:54Ah.
08:57Old leg.
08:58Bit of chip.
09:00Better have a drink.
09:01Come on through.
09:02Oh.
09:03Oh, Basil.
09:04Look, let me call her then.
09:06What?
09:06Let me call her from down here
09:08and see what she says about it.
09:10Oh.
09:10There's the phone.
09:11Come on, Basil.
09:12Let's have a drink.
09:13No, no, please.
09:15Come on, please.
09:16Why not?
09:17Well, no, she's having a bit of a sleep.
09:19Sleep, you know.
09:20She can sleep all day, Basil.
09:21She won't mind me.
09:22No, but she's lost her voice.
09:24Lost her voice?
09:25Poor thing.
09:25Go on, just like that.
09:26Come on.
09:27Yes, just coming, Roger.
09:29After you, Alice.
09:30Yes.
09:33All right, Alice.
09:34What would you like to drink, Alice?
09:36Oh, gin and it, please, Basil.
09:38Right.
09:39Has a doctor been?
09:41What's yours, Rog?
09:43Gin and tonic.
09:45Oh, yes, of course.
09:46Right.
09:46Basil?
09:47Mm-hmm.
09:47Has a doctor been?
09:49Nuts.
09:53They've had a row.
09:54She's refused to come down.
09:57Um, you were just asking about the doctor?
09:59Yes.
09:59Yes, he hasn't been yet in fact.
10:01Oh.
10:01I expect we'll get him back this afternoon.
10:03Yes.
10:03Well, what a shame, eh?
10:05Poor old Sib.
10:06On your anniversary, too.
10:08Yeah.
10:09Oh, hello, Polly.
10:10Oh, hello, Mrs. Terry.
10:11Is it a shame about Mrs. Fawlty?
10:14Isn't it?
10:14I'm afraid the doctor says she's going to have to be in bed for a couple of days.
10:18Yes, but the doctor hasn't actually been yet, Polly.
10:21I don't know who you were thinking of.
10:23But that man this morning, he looked like a doctor.
10:26Yes, yes, he did, actually.
10:28Yes, that's true.
10:28But he wasn't, unfortunately.
10:30He wasn't a doctor.
10:31No, no, he was a dentist.
10:32A dentist?
10:34What was a dentist doing here?
10:36Staying in the hotel.
10:38He's a guest, you see.
10:38Dentists do stay in hotels, you know.
10:40Yes, but they don't go about telling people's wives to stay in bed, do they?
10:45Oh, he must have been talking about his wife.
10:48His wife?
10:49Well, jolly good, Lush.
10:50Nice to see you both.
10:51Cheers.
10:52Up yours, Lush.
10:56She's better soon.
10:58Oh, yes, yes.
10:59Who were Sib or the dentist's wife?
11:04Well, you're both keeping well, are you?
11:06Oh, yes, yes.
11:07Couldn't be better.
11:08And you, Basil?
11:09Oh, can't complain.
11:10Well, I could, but he wouldn't do any good, would it?
11:13Well, it's a shame.
11:15On your anniversary as well.
11:16Yeah, still all comes out of the wash, doesn't it?
11:19We're thinking of having this room done up, as a matter of fact.
11:21Really?
11:22Oh, sort of captain's cabin, you know.
11:23Put a couple of charts on the wall, a few ropes, wheel in the corner, that sort of thing.
11:26Yeah, give it a bit of class.
11:29Wasn't my idea, Roger.
11:31Poor Sib or...
11:32Hello!
11:33Oh, hello, hello, Basil.
11:36Hello, hello, Virginia.
11:37Hello, Arthur.
11:38Happy anniversary.
11:40Oh, thank you, thank you, yes.
11:42We brought you a little surprise.
11:43Oh, can I see?
11:45Mm-hmm.
11:47Oh, cake, lovely.
11:49Jolly nice.
11:50Oh, did you make it?
11:52Oh, lots of extra marzipan.
11:55Yes, she's not well.
11:56Hmm?
11:57Sib or...
11:57Not well?
11:59She's in bed.
12:00That's not like Sib or...
12:02She's lost her voice.
12:04What is it?
12:05Well, we're not absolutely sure.
12:07I bet she'd like a bit of that marzipan.
12:09Roger.
12:10Cheer her up, Baz.
12:11Good idea.
12:12We'll take her up a slice.
12:14Yes, I don't think we better.
12:15Well, why not?
12:16Well, she really ought not to be disturbed.
12:17Oh, just for a minute, Basil.
12:19It's not a very good idea.
12:20Tomorrow, perhaps.
12:21Oh, what on earth?
12:22The nurse are with her.
12:23Has the doctor been?
12:24No, but the dentist had a good look.
12:29The dentist?
12:30No, we called the doctor and we described the symptoms through him over the phone.
12:34He says she ought to stay very, very quiet.
12:36Now, Polly, what would you like to drink, Virginia?
12:38Oh, medium sherry, please.
12:40Mr. Ford.
12:41What are the symptoms?
12:43Well, she's lost her voice and she's very puffed up.
12:46Yes, what is it, Mr. Ford?
12:48Ishten.
12:48He's been very difficult.
12:50Puffed up?
12:50What?
12:51He moved my pot.
12:52He put his pot where my pot is.
12:54Polly, what's puffed up?
12:57Beer for me.
12:59Well, put your pot somewhere else.
13:00I put it somewhere else.
13:02He move it again.
13:03What's puffed up?
13:05Lies.
13:05Well, tell him I said you ought to do it, all right?
13:07What?
13:08Lies.
13:09I tell you, he won't to make trouble.
13:10He pushy, mopping my feet.
13:13Her thighs.
13:16Thighs?
13:17Well, most of her legs, actually.
13:20Now, just tell him.
13:20Go on.
13:21Basil.
13:22Hmm?
13:23Polly says her legs are puffed up.
13:26Are they?
13:31No, Sibyl's.
13:33What?
13:34Sibyl's legs.
13:36Sibyl's legs?
13:37Her thighs.
13:38Oh, uh, yes.
13:40Just a bit.
13:41A tiny bit.
13:42But mainly around the face, around the eyes, you know?
13:47Face is puffed up.
13:48She's lost her voice and her legs are a bit...
13:51Expanded.
13:51Sad, isn't it?
13:52The old sow.
13:54Ha, ha.
13:54Oh, when's the doctor coming?
13:57Later.
13:57Soon.
13:58Soon.
13:58When?
13:59Well, I don't know exactly.
14:00Well, I bet you do.
14:01I can have a look at her.
14:02What?
14:02She sounds ill, Basil.
14:04She is ill.
14:05That's why we don't want people going up there and talking to her.
14:08I'm not going to talk to her, Basil.
14:10I'm going to look at her.
14:12Look at...
14:12She's ill, isn't she?
14:14What's the bloody point of looking at her?
14:18I am a nurse, Basil.
14:21Oh, no.
14:21I know!
14:22I...
14:23I...
14:24Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
14:26She knows that, everyone.
14:28All the years I've known her, Virginia, she thinks I've forgotten she's a nurse.
14:32You're a marvel, you know?
14:33Ha, ha.
14:35Please let me go, Basil.
14:36Mm-hmm?
14:37I want you to look at Sybil.
14:39Well, you can't.
14:39Why not?
14:41Because...
14:43Because...
14:43You've lost weight, haven't you?
14:44Isn't that absolutely...
14:46Mr. Pauldy?
14:48Hmm?
14:48I think you ought to tell them.
14:51Oh.
14:52Right.
14:53About the doctor coming this morning?
14:57He came this morning.
14:59First thing.
15:00Well, why didn't you say...
15:04He didn't want to worry you.
15:06I didn't want to worry you.
15:09Is this serious?
15:12Well, it might be.
15:13Oh, dear.
15:14I mean, not completely serious, but slightly serious.
15:16Oh.
15:18Poor Basil.
15:19It's all right.
15:19I'd just rather be, you know, talking about it.
15:22Yes.
15:22Hello, everyone.
15:23Hello.
15:24Hello, Basil.
15:26Hello, Basil.
15:27Hello, Roger.
15:28Hello, Reg.
15:29Hello.
15:29Hi.
15:30Sybil's not here, is she?
15:32Uh, no.
15:32No.
15:33There you are, you see.
15:33I told you so.
15:35I just saw her in the town.
15:37What?
15:39In her car.
15:40In the high street.
15:43That's that other woman.
15:45What other woman?
15:46That woman who looks slightly like Sybil.
15:49You know her, don't you?
15:50You know?
15:51Like Sybil?
15:52Well, yes.
15:53Very, very broad, yes.
15:54She's from the north.
15:55Drives her red maxi, does she?
15:56Well, her husband does.
15:57I think I expect she borrowed it.
15:58Perhaps she stole yours, old boy.
16:00It's not out there.
16:01It's at the garage, Rog.
16:02Perhaps she looks like Sybil.
16:05Yes.
16:05And she comes from the north.
16:06Well, she has a northern accent.
16:08You know, I assume she's from the north.
16:10Oh, you've spoken to her?
16:12Mm-hmm.
16:12What's her name?
16:13Well, I don't know her name.
16:14I mean, I only met her once.
16:15What?
16:16But of fate, I mean.
16:17Sorry, Basil.
16:18I didn't mean.
16:19No, no, of course.
16:21By the way, Basil, where is Sybil?
16:23She's in bed.
16:23Oh, dear.
16:25Yes, she's really not well.
16:26She really mustn't see anybody.
16:28Now, what?
16:28Not at all?
16:29No.
16:29Can't we just put our heads round the corner?
16:32No, I'm afraid, Archie,
16:32doesn't have any excitement.
16:34Oh, Basil.
16:35What do you mean, old Basil?
16:37Well, we are her oldest friends, old man.
16:39I mean, it can only do her good.
16:40And we have all come over here to see you both.
16:42Well, I'm sorry if you've been put out.
16:45I mean, you'll have some dreams, plenty of nuts,
16:47see your old friends, have some laughs.
16:48But if that isn't good enough,
16:49I'll refund your petrol for you.
16:52Oh, steady on, Basil.
16:54Well, I'm sorry, Missy.
16:55Of course, we understand.
16:57You're a bit upset.
16:59Well, you know.
16:59Yes, of course.
17:01But you know us well enough.
17:03You should have called it off,
17:04waited till she's better.
17:05Well, I would have done, Rich,
17:06but there just wasn't time.
17:07Wasn't time?
17:08She only began to puff up about an hour ago.
17:10Have you said that the doctor came first thing this morning?
17:13Yes, yes, that's right.
17:15Yes, that was for the throats.
17:16The puffing up started after he'd gone.
17:18Okay?
17:19After?
17:20Yes, after you're taking notes.
17:22Where have you gone?
17:24I'm going to see her.
17:25That's something very peculiar about all this.
17:28No, I'm not standing here
17:30while an old friend like Sybil is...
17:31Look, it's perfectly Sybil.
17:34Sybil's not well.
17:35She lost her throat and her voice hurt.
17:37The doctor came and said it was a bit serious.
17:39Not a lot, a bit.
17:41He went away.
17:42She started to puff up.
17:43He's coming back later this afternoon
17:45and it's best for her to be on her own.
17:47Now, what is so peculiar about that?
17:51Her driving round in the town.
17:55What did you say?
17:57No, it's all right.
17:58Just a joke, Bas.
17:59Can I have another gin, please?
18:00Just a joke?
18:01What?
18:01She's down there in the town,
18:03driving around, is that what she is?
18:04Of course it isn't, Basel.
18:05No, no, no, no.
18:06Obviously, I've been standing around here
18:08making up crackpot stories
18:09about my wife being seriously upstairs.
18:11Is that it?
18:12No, no, no.
18:12Of course not.
18:13It was just that it was a bit funny
18:14Kitty seeing that northern woman in the car.
18:17Funny?
18:18Oh, I see.
18:20You mean you think that that was Sybil in the car
18:23and she's not upstairs.
18:23Is that it?
18:25Oh, I understand.
18:27I've got it now.
18:28Right.
18:28Well, what are we all waiting round here for?
18:31Come on.
18:31Everybody upstairs.
18:33Come on.
18:35No, Basel.
18:36Come on.
18:37Everyone who thinks I'm a liar.
18:38Come on.
18:39Come on.
18:39Come on, Basel.
18:40Come on, Basel.
18:41Hang on.
18:42Oh, don't get like that, Basel.
18:45Come on.
18:45We don't want to.
18:46No, be best to leave her.
18:47We'll see her some other time.
18:48Yes, when she's feeling better.
18:50But Roger wants to, you know.
18:51No, we mustn't disturb her, Basel.
18:53No, no, no, no.
18:54If Roger wants to...
18:55He doesn't, Basel.
18:57Well, we could just say hello.
19:00Oh, Roger!
19:01Right.
19:02All right.
19:03Fine.
19:04All right.
19:05Okay, then.
19:06Fine.
19:06No problem.
19:07No problem.
19:08Suits me.
19:09Good idea.
19:10I'll just pop upstairs and ask her to stop dying
19:12and then you can all come up and identify.
19:15All right, Polly, could you give me a hand?
19:17Help yourself to another drink.
19:19Please, make yourself at home.
19:20Relax.
19:21Any more nuts?
19:23What are you doing?
19:24I won't have to say anything.
19:26What?
19:27Oh, no.
19:27Come on.
19:28No, no, no.
19:29Come on.
19:29No!
19:31I won't.
19:31Yes, you will.
19:32How much?
19:33It's easy.
19:34You put on her dark glasses.
19:35One of her wings.
19:37Come on.
19:39Keep away from me.
19:40Mr. Porto, will you listen to me?
19:42We'll draw the curtain.
19:43Oh, come on.
19:44They never believe I was...
19:46This thing is believing.
19:47But I don't look like her.
19:49You're a woman, aren't you?
19:50My faces go along.
19:52Well, shortly.
19:53You lost your voice.
19:54All you have to do is wave.
19:55Wave?
19:56You put one hand up and dig it about.
19:58You soon get the hang of it.
20:01Mr. Porto, I know you're very excited.
20:05You might even be having another spray down.
20:07I don't know.
20:08I'm no expert.
20:09But you must really try and see that this isn't going to work.
20:12Get that on.
20:13It isn't going to work.
20:14What's the matter?
20:15What's the matter?
20:16I'm not doing it.
20:17You want to be in a Marx Brothers film.
20:19That's your problem.
20:20I'm not interested.
20:21Not interested?
20:22No.
20:23This is all your fault.
20:24My fault?
20:25You said to say she was ill.
20:26You were the one who invited them to come up here.
20:28They didn't even want to.
20:30You be Sibyl.
20:31You get into the bed.
20:32I'm too big.
20:33I'm full of a stash.
20:34What's he supposed to be?
20:35A great big hairy bogey?
20:37It's something you get when you're pumped up.
20:41I'll ruin you.
20:42You'll never waitress in talking again.
20:46Waitress?
20:47That's a joke.
20:48I help out at reception.
20:49I clean the rooms.
20:50I deal with the tradesmen.
20:52I mend the switchboard.
20:53I change the fuses.
20:54And if you think my duties now include impersonating members of your family,
20:59you have got one more screw loose than I thought.
21:02I'm not doing it.
21:03Do you understand?
21:04You get yourself out of it.
21:05It's nothing to do with me.
21:22A hundred for the car.
21:26All right.
21:29Now.
21:30What?
21:30Now.
21:31Now?
21:31Now.
21:37Hello?
21:39He's not possible.
21:40What?
21:40He's not possible for me.
21:42Please come.
21:42What is it?
21:43He's telling me.
21:44Please come.
21:44Look, I'm busy.
21:45He tell me.
21:46I not know to make a paella.
21:49He tell me.
21:50You tell him.
21:51I tell him paella is a Spanish, not cockney, stinking eel pie.
21:55Right.
21:56I make the paella like my mama.
21:58I'm not interested.
21:59My mother's recipe is big in Barthelona.
22:02Go away.
22:02Go away.
22:02No, please.
22:03You come.
22:03You come.
22:04He call me ignorant, wog, mother boy, crump.
22:08Let go of me.
22:09Now, look.
22:09Barthel?
22:10Yes?
22:11I do tell Terry.
22:12Let you alone.
22:13Barthel?
22:13Yes, French.
22:14Go on.
22:15Go away.
22:17No, no.
22:17Not you.
22:18Not you.
22:18You're speaking about it on a big, big.
22:21Are we supposed to come up there?
22:22Uh, yes.
22:23In a moment.
22:24Um, no, no, no.
22:26Come on up now.
22:27You know.
22:28Yes, come on up.
22:29Yes, she's just, um, you know, touching up the worst bits.
22:33How is she feeling, Basil?
22:34Well, um, I woke her and told that you come over and she's very, very pleased, of course,
22:39but she's very weak and her throat, you know, she has great difficulty expressing herself.
22:43Oh, dear.
22:46Makes a change.
22:50She should be able to see you in a moment.
22:52She's pretty quick with the old...
22:53Well, she's not bothering to make up for us, is she?
22:55Oh, no, no, no, no.
22:56Just, um, you know.
23:01She asked me to thank you and to say how very much she's looking forward to seeing you all.
23:05You're nice.
23:07She can speak a little then, can't she, Basil?
23:12No.
23:13Not.
23:13Really, no.
23:14No, I see what you mean.
23:15No, she, she wrote that down, actually, on one of the, uh, postcards.
23:18You know, she keeps by the side of it.
23:20Did she stamp it?
23:26Basil, do you have an ashtray?
23:28Oh, yes, I'll just get one, Alice.
23:29Oh, Basil, don't...
23:30No, no, it's no, it's no bother.
23:31No, no, not at all.
23:32Trust me a second.
23:45Oh, Mr. Valdi.
23:46Mr. Valdi.
23:49He put mince in it.
23:51He put bloody mince in it.
23:53But you've done.
23:54Oh, sorry, sorry.
23:56Look, I tell him, paella, he's a fisty.
23:59Go away, go away.
24:00Oh, what I do?
24:01Go away.
24:02Arriba.
24:02Samus.
24:03Oh, no, no, no, no.
24:07Well, this is fun, isn't it?
24:09Roger.
24:10No, I mean, who wants to go to the boozer or play golf when you can come to one of
24:14Basil's
24:14do's?
24:16Oh, come on, Roger.
24:18It can't be easy for him with Sibyl lying there ill.
24:22Well, you know what I think about that?
24:25What?
24:25Shh.
24:27Oh, well.
24:29I brought some nuts.
24:30Oh, Basil, yes.
24:31If you could just take the ashtray or we just...
24:34Oh, sorry.
24:35Never mind.
24:36Oh, I'll get some more, shall I?
24:38No, no, no, you've got the crisps.
24:39Are you sure?
24:40I don't mind.
24:40No, no, no, no, crisps will be lovely.
24:42Really?
24:42Oh, OK.
24:43Um, crisp, Alice?
24:44Oh, thank you.
24:46Arthur, would you like a crisp?
24:50Thank you, lovely.
24:51Just hold them.
24:51Here, I'll just get a brush.
24:53A basil brush.
24:57Broom, broom.
24:59Roger.
25:00What did you mean?
25:02Well, they've had a row.
25:03She's refused to come down.
25:05Roger.
25:06He's embarrassed her into seeing us.
25:08I'm not interested.
25:10I'm not interested.
25:16Oh, don't you bother.
25:18Name it to me.
25:19There we are.
25:20Right.
25:21Basil.
25:24Basil.
25:25Hmm?
25:26Perhaps she's ready now.
25:28Oh, yes.
25:28Uh, good idea.
25:30Yes, I'll just have a look.
25:32Right.
25:35It's not quite.
25:38Nearly.
25:40Anyone care for another, Chris?
25:42Would you like...
25:42No, don't be quite.
25:45Have you got a choc ice?
25:49I'll put them there.
25:50You know, just help yourself.
25:51Nice carpet, Baz.
25:53Oh, thank you.
25:53Yes, a bit worn now.
25:55Oh, I thought that was part of the pattern.
25:59Nice paper, Basil.
26:00Oh, thank you, Alice.
26:01Yes, we got it together with the carpet.
26:02Oh, with it?
26:03That's right, Roger.
26:04Yeah, well, one of them will have to go.
26:06My money's on the carpet.
26:08Yes.
26:09You read a lot of Oscar Wilde, do you, Roger?
26:11Yes.
26:11I don't know.
26:12I don't know if you've ever seen the moulding up there.
26:15But one of...
26:15Oh, dear!
26:16It's all right.
26:17It's all right.
26:18It's all right.
26:18Don't worry.
26:18Don't worry.
26:19I'll clean it up.
26:20What drives the main feature?
26:22Morning, Poppy.
26:23Lovely day for a round of golf.
26:25Morning, Major.
26:26Yes.
26:27Anyone care to make up a floor?
26:29No, no.
26:30We're going to see Sybil, Major.
26:31Ah, playing a match, is she?
26:34No, no.
26:34She's ill.
26:35Really quite ill.
26:35Oh, she should be in bed, you know.
26:38Yes, she is.
26:39We're going in to see her.
26:40Oh, another lot in there with her, is there?
26:43May I introduce Major Gowen, our oldest resident?
26:46I don't know if you know everyone.
26:48I'm delighted to meet you.
26:50Welcome to Torquay.
26:52How do you do, my dear?
26:54And welcome to you, sir.
26:55It's all right.
26:56She's ready now.
26:57Come on in.
26:57Oh, splendid.
26:58Yes, not you.
27:02Oh, Sybil.
27:03Hello, darling.
27:04Don't try and speak.
27:06The gang's here.
27:07Sorry you're not well.
27:09Such a shit.
27:10So we thought we'd come and wish you happy anniversary.
27:13Yeah, happy anniversary.
27:14Oh, just a map of the bed.
27:16The bed has fallen over.
27:17You all right, Reg?
27:18Stuck my ankles.
27:19Oh, dear.
27:20You all right, Reg?
27:21Careful.
27:22It's so dark in here.
27:24Bloody light's not worth it.
27:26Oh, Kitty.
27:27Oh, my God.
27:28Oh, my God.
27:28Who's that?
27:29Me.
27:30It's Kitty.
27:31Where are you, dear?
27:32Can't we have some light in here, Basil?
27:34Yes, all right.
27:35Hang on.
27:35Are you all right?
27:36Here we are.
27:37Here we are.
27:37I think so.
27:38Mind that.
27:39Okay.
27:40Now the light's on.
27:42We can see the screen.
27:43Oh, dear.
27:44Are you all right, Kitty?
27:46Bring us home.
27:46Oh!
27:48You shouldn't have gone to all this trouble, Basil.
27:50Well, would you come on up here, okay?
27:53You both all right?
27:53Come on around there, okay?
27:55You can see her from there.
27:57Oh, everything all right, dear?
27:59Here she is.
28:00Hello, Chibble.
28:02Oh, yeah.
28:03There's something there.
28:05I'm still moving.
28:06It's a bit dark, Basil.
28:08Yes, well, her eyes are very sensitive.
28:10She's got her glasses.
28:11Yes, well, I'll just draw the curtains.
28:13Yes, yes, yes, I know the idea.
28:15It's all right.
28:15Trust me, yes, trust me, dear.
28:17Trust me.
28:20There we are.
28:21Is that better?
28:23Happy anniversary.
28:25Happy anniversary.
28:27Oh, dear.
28:30How are you feeling, dear?
28:34Oh, that's a shame.
28:36You're very swollen.
28:41Her thighs.
28:43He brought you a cake.
28:45Oh, yes, dear.
28:46Have a little bit, dear.
28:48Oh, have a little bit, dear.
28:50Go on.
28:51Oh, yes.
28:52All right.
28:53Well, 15 years, eh?
28:56Happy anniversary.
28:57Well done, folks.
29:00Well, well, well.
29:01Well, well, well.
29:01Oh, how it could have been so long.
29:04Yes, well, I think she's feeling a little bit tired.
29:06Use all that waving and wear anyone out.
29:09Yes, well, I think that are all...
29:12What's in her mouth?
29:14That white stuff?
29:16Just foam, you know, from, from, uh, from next time.
29:2115 years, eh?
29:27What is it?
29:28What is it?
29:29I just remembered something.
29:30Downstairs.
29:31You stay here.
29:32Have a chat with Polly.
29:32Sibyl, Sibyl, I'll just do a choppy moment.
29:36A chat?
29:37Does anyone know Sam before?
29:44Hello, dear.
29:46I came back from my cab's basil and nut stain.
29:48Oh, aren't you...
29:49OK.
29:51What?
29:53I'm sure you know best, dear.
29:55You don't even want me to, do you?
29:58Um, what's that?
30:0315 years I've been with you, when I think what I might have had.
30:0715 years.
30:08God.
30:11You want me to go, don't you?
30:13Oh, no, but you've obviously made your mind up, so...
30:17I won't forget this, Basil.
30:19Won't you, dear?
30:20No, I won't.
30:23I'm going now, Basil.
30:24I think it's best, don't you?
30:26All right, dear.
30:29Bye, Basil.
30:32Sure, dear.
30:35Drive carefully, dear.
30:37Get well soon.
30:38Look after yourself.
30:40We'll have a little party when you're feeling better.
30:44You know, I don't like leaving you like this, dear.
30:48Let me just have a little feel, just to see if...
30:52Now, now, now, now, don't be frightened.
30:55No, I'm not going to hurt you.
30:58Now, just feel your glands, dear.
31:01Now, don't be silly, Sibyl.
31:04Just trust me, it's for your own good.
31:07Now, don't be silly.
31:08Ah!
31:10What's going on?
31:12She hit me, Basil!
31:15What?
31:16I was trying to examine her, she lashed out!
31:20Don't!
31:20Don't hit our friends!
31:22I know you're not feeling 100% of control yourself.
31:24I'm sorry, she's not herself today.
31:26Don't worry, the doctor will be happy here soon.
31:28I'll give you a call.
31:29Tell you what he says.
31:30So, um...
31:31Anyone care for another drink or...?
31:33No, I'll run.
31:34We ought to be going.
31:36It's going to be...
31:37It's quite nice.
31:37It's quite nice.
31:38Right.
31:39Oh!
31:42They're all the same, dear.
31:45They're all the same, believe me.
31:48Oh, I know.
31:49Oh, no.
31:50I know.
31:51Now, we need to get all about it.
31:53We're going to have a nice game of golf and then go out to dinner.
31:56Yeah.
31:58Did you get your clubs?
32:03I'm sorry.
32:05I'm sorry.
32:05I'm sorry.
32:06I'm sorry.
32:10I'm sorry.
32:10Well, awfully nice to have seen you all.
32:12Thanks for you coming over.
32:15Not at all.
32:17We must do this more often, you know, when they fit again.
32:20Yes, yes.
32:20Sorry about all the injuries.
32:22Still, um...
32:23You know, perhaps when Sybil's a bit better, we can all, um, get together and, you know, have a proper...
32:34How extraordinary.
32:36We were just talking about you.
32:38Uh, Basil Fawlty.
32:39We met once, at a fete.
32:41Let me show you where it is.
32:42How is the North?
32:43Have you been out there at all recently?
32:45What's it?
32:46What's it?
32:46You're no good shit!
32:49You're no good shit!
32:51I'll have to kill him, Mr. Boyle!
32:53I'll have to kill him!
32:54I would sound fucking fine you!
32:56Explain everything in a moment.
33:00What?
33:01I want my father like that!
33:03He's not mine!
33:04He's not mine!
33:06He's not mine!
33:08What a coincidence, sir.
33:09She's thinking of buying one of our fridges.
33:12Well, lovely to have seen you.
33:13I'm sorry about the, the ankle.
33:16Why, I'm sorry.
33:17Yes, keep, keep the head right back.
33:20Sorry, there is a display on...
33:23Great fun.
33:24Oh, dear.
33:25Oh, dear.
33:25Oh, dear.
33:33Piece of cake.
33:35Now comes the tricky bit.
33:38Oh, dear.
33:58Oh, dear.
34:02Oh, dear.
34:04Oh, dear.
34:10Oh, dear.
34:14Oh, dear.
34:15Oh, dear.
34:16Oh, dear.
34:17Oh, dear.
34:17Oh, dear.
34:18Oh, dear.
34:19Oh, dear.
34:20Oh, dear.
34:20Oh, dear.
34:21Oh, dear.
34:22Oh, dear.
34:23Oh, dear.
34:24Oh, dear.
34:24Oh, dear.
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