- 3 minutes ago
He Missed My Surgery for Her ASM
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00:00left eye the moment the scalpel sliced into my left eye my husband darian blackwood was tangled
00:08up in bed with his mistress when i woke from general anesthesia the first thing i did was
00:13open my chat with darian darian tomorrow night's the full moon my curse is going to flare up again
00:20the doctor said the success rate this time is only one in three if i wake up and you're not
00:25there
00:26then we're over the messages had been sent a day ago he still hadn't replied then an anonymous
00:32message popped up a video he was roughly pulling open his mistress's nightgone straps kissing
00:39drunkenly along her neck the bedside clock showed the exact time i'd been in surgery the night before
00:46in the video he looked so passionate but in our chat history every reply he ever sent me was cold
00:54i'm busy get my assistant to sign the papers i'm in a board meeting you don't need to tell me
01:00these
01:00things anymore eventually he muted my messages all together and assigned me a private assistant
01:06someone who's only was signing documents that required a partner's authorization sorry but i
01:11don't think he'll have time to visit you today either i stared blankly at that message and finally
01:16decided to give up on this relationship i texted the assistant don't come anymore then i called my
01:23lawyer draft a separation agreement for me as the anesthesia wore off my skull started through being
01:32with pain i couldn't even close my eyes when this curse flared up i might lose my left eye completely
01:39half conscious i wondered if i died on that operating table this time when would darian find out
01:47probably when they called him to identify my body after all his time and attention would never belong
01:53to a beta like me someone without pheromones that evening the isolation room door opened darian
02:00walked in carrying a thermos bag and a gift bag how are you feeling i'm okay that's good
02:10brought you soup i'm allergic to seafood the one who left seafood was his mistress luna then had taken
02:17the gift bag sorry i couldn't stay with you last night this is to make up for it inside was
02:24a delicate
02:24hair clip he didn't care about anything related to me he didn't even know that after multiple
02:30serenial surgeries i'd shaved my head long ago luna got sunburned at the beach so i brought her to the
02:37hospital to get checked as he spoke he poured me a bowl of soup she got burned pretty badly her
02:44whole
02:44back's red i said nothing why aren't you drinking it he leaned closer and i caught the heavy sugary scent
02:53of perfume i ignored the question you changed cologne he paused then smiled luna recommended it
03:02smells nice doesn't it if you like it i'll have her bring you some after all these years he should
03:10have known that as a scentless beta i hated anything that masks natural scent but nothing about me had ever
03:16mattered to him the isolation room fell silent for a few seconds then his phone notification broke the
03:22quiet oh right the assistant said you told him not to come anymore he won't need to sign anything
03:27for me anymore as long as you're getting better softly i said i'm not the curse is getting worse
03:35i may need permanent isolation at any time
03:41do you still want this relationship darian look at this video it's so funny
03:46he muted the volume and finally looked at me what did you say the machines kept beeping steadily
03:55you went to the hamptons this time done with work his expression stayed calm luna's been wanting to
04:01go to the beach for ages there happened to be a project inspection there so i took her along
04:08if you want to go i'll take you once you recover
04:11there was a knock at the door my attending physician walked in to discuss my treatment plan
04:16you guys talk luna's probably done with her checkup by now darian glanced at his watch and grabbed his
04:20coat he was always like this living entirely in luna's bright lively world nothing about me had ever
04:29mattered to him the day i was discharged darian said he'd pick me up i sat outside the hospital waiting
04:34for him beside me was a canvas bag filled with discharge papers medical files and a huge pile
04:41of suppressive medication i scrolled through my phone luna had updated her story again
04:467 a.m a sunrise jogging photo two silhouettes from behind one tall one short caption early birds
04:54get the sunrise 8 a.m a bathroom door fogged with steam a smiley face drawn in the condensation
05:00someone's waiting for me to shower 8 30 a.m breakfast on a hotel balcony two sets of utensils
05:07under warm sunlight mornings are better when you eat with someone the man who said he was coming
05:12to pick me up was busy living someone else's life at 10 o'clock darian's car finally arrived
05:19the passenger side window rolled down luna hi bianca darian's dropping me off at work
05:29traffic was bad darian got out from the driver's seat and opened the back door i said nothing
05:34and walked over carrying my medication luna leaned against the car window suddenly staring at my left
05:40eye what happened to your eye it looks cloudy that's so weird she waved her fingers in front of me
05:48can you see that how many fingers she's near feast darian interrupted oh luna pulled her hand back my left
05:57eye had been blind for three years i told him more than 10 times he still didn't remember luna and
06:04opened the car door and walked over what are all these meds can i look she reached into my bag
06:10i shifted
06:11slightly trying to avoid her touch the bag wasn't tied properly the moment she touched it pill bottles
06:18and medication boxes spilled everywhere pills rolled across the ground some disappeared into cracks between
06:24the steps others rolled beneath the tires how can you not even hold on to a bag properly darian frowned
06:30and looked away i crouched down picking them up one by one my stitches had only just been removed
06:37the moment i bent down pressure mounded through my cull and my vision darkened luna crouched too
06:43let me help in her panic she crushed several pills beneath her hand oops sorry bianca darian crouched
06:51beside her and helped her back up they're broken forget it no need to pick them up they're not
06:56expensive i slowly stood yeah not expensive he checked his watch and frowned then have her go back into the
07:04hospital and get me new ones that's unnecessary she was only trying to help you can go get them
07:09yourself luna's going to be late for work i'll drop her off first i'll send someone to pick you up
07:14luna
07:14was already back in the passenger seat waving at me through the window bye
07:21darian left me with nothing but his back i thought i would cry but my eyes stayed dry even my
07:27heartbeat
07:28remained calm like the person driving away wasn't someone i loved just a stranger maybe i
07:34really didn't care anymore when i got home i took the partner agreement out of my bag and signed it
07:40then i started packing my things one 24 inch suitcase was enough to hold eight years of my life
07:46there was a framed photo of darian and i on the bedside table taken at a gala three years ago
07:51back
07:52then my hair was still long tied in a low pintail he wore a dark suit and smiled softly i
07:58picked up the
07:58frame and turned it over on the back someone had written you're already the past the one beside him now
08:04is
08:04me luna i stared at it for a few seconds before turning it back over and placing it on top
08:09of
08:10the agreement my phone rang darian he almost never called me first i answered there was music in the
08:19background like he was at a bar darian about the separation agreement he interrupted me luna likes
08:26your painting moonlight fragments of course it was about her i paused not for sale she really likes
08:34it one million i don't like her i'm not selling it to her silence hung on the other end for
08:41two seconds
08:42how much do you want name your price i laughed softly and set the phone down on the table the
08:48bedside
08:48drawer was slightly open i pulled it open inside was our marriage certificate luna had stuck one of her
08:55selfies directly over my face in the picture she smiled brightly and threw up a peace sign my face
09:01was completely covered i remembered the day we took that photo i was healthy then full of color
09:07darian stood beside me smiling gently when i found out luna had tampered with the certificate i
09:13contrunted him about it he barely glanced at it before promising he'd go replace it with me
09:17it's just a photo it's not a big deal luna likes joking around just let her have this one
09:24three years he never found the time to replace it his voice came through the phone again luna is
09:31sensitive if she doesn't get what she wants she'll keep making a fuss just give in and stop making
09:35things difficult for me since you won't sell it no matter how much i offer then your gallery
09:39sponsorship won't be approved either let me know when you change your mind
09:44do whatever you want i tugged at the corner of my lips the sound of the call ending echoed through
09:50the empty room everything in my left eye was blurry gray like fog that would never clear and that
09:56familiar pain slowly crept back into my chest when darian first pursued me everyone in the family
10:01thought he'd lost his mind my unpredictable curse my unstatable temper my scentless beta body none of it
10:07made me seem fit to be anyone's partner but he said it didn't matter he said quiet was fine
10:12coldness was fine he liked all of it for the first time in my life i thought maybe i could
10:17rely on
10:18someone but what happened after that he was always busy said he'd spend time with me once the company
10:23stabilized the way he looked at me changed slowly from heartbreak whenever my curse flared up to
10:28helplessness to numbness eventually he stopped coming altogether he missed so many moments and every
10:35time i told myself next time will be different next time he'll come until the surgery where i almost
10:42died as my consciousness faded i thought i'm probably never going to see darian again when i woke up
10:49i only had one thought i wanted to see him so i spent 20 exhausting hours traveling to paris where
10:55he
10:55was supposedly on a business trip and what i saw was him naked in bed with luna holding her in
11:00his arms
11:01that's when i finally understood he wasn't busy he hadn't lost the desire to share his life with
11:06someone that someone just wasn't me anymore it was the first time in my life i broke down like a
11:11mad
11:11woman i slapped that girl hard and smashed everything i could get my hands on why are you
11:17doing this to me do you know i almost died broken glass sliced across my calf warm blood streamed down
11:24my leg but i felt nothing do you think i'm pathetic is that it
11:33calm down the way you look right now is ugly
11:37i stood trembling among the shattered glass gasping for breath 20 hours of flying going straight from the
11:44operating table just to see him all of it turned to ashes in that moment from that day on darian
11:51rarely
11:51came home he muted my notifications the only way i could know anything about his life was through
11:58luna's posts
12:02three days later i got a message from darian charity gala tonight eight o'clock be there he ignored my
12:08messages and still hadn't signed the separation agreement after thinking it over i decided to
12:13talk to him face to face i put on a wig and slipped the agreement into my bag the moment
12:19i entered the
12:19ballroom i saw darian with luna in his arms they were dancing in the middle of the floor she leaned
12:25against him while he lowered his head to say something smiling softly i stood there watching
12:29for a moment before walking in you froze beyond his gallery funding because of me do you think
12:35she'll be upset luna whispered in his ear brightly she starved for affection a little comforting and
12:40she'll get over it without missing a step darian patted her waist lightly i stood at the edge of the
12:45dance floor people nearby glanced between me and the couple dancing isn't that darian's beta haven't
12:50seen her in forever is she here to catch him cheating with how biased darian is towards that
12:55girl who even knows who the real third party is look at her did you hear the song ended why
13:03are you
13:03here darian saw me and let go of luna luna looped herself around his arm and smiled sweetly at me
13:08i need to talk to you i immediately understood she was the one who'd sent the message i looked at
13:14darian luna tugged on his arm darian the next dance is starting he frowned whatever it is wait
13:21until this dance is over suddenly the lights flickered then went out the crowd erupted into
13:27noise in the darkness a hand suddenly yanked hard at my wig pain ripping across my scalp then the lights
13:35came back on i looked down my wig lay on the floor all that remained on my head was a
13:41layer of short
13:41stubble and red scars left behind by the curse
13:49the entire ballroom fell silent eyes turned towards me from every direction that's horrifying no wonder
13:57darian never brings her anywhere anymore if it were me i'd feel sick just looking at her is that curse
14:00backlash is it contagious a camera flash went off someone had raised a phone and started taking
14:05pictures luna smiled faintly she crouched down picked up the wig and held it out to me biana i'm
14:13sorry it was too dark i didn't see i stared blankly without taking it darian walked over helped me up
14:22and
14:22pulled me outside bawled dragged through the entire ballroom under everyone's eyes the whispers slowly faded
14:29behind us neither of us spoke my mind was empty my hands shook uncontrollably i hadn't thought about
14:36those dark years in a very long time isolation vomiting seeing my bald reflection in the mirror
14:42while everyone whispered stay away from her and now the person i once loved most had personally
14:48shoved me back into that hell when we got home darian poured me a glass of water i'll have all
14:54the
14:54photos and videos from tonight deleted i said nothing you don't need to think too much about it
15:00i'll make sure nobody spreads them i blinked slowly including luna she was the one who texted me
15:07he frowned the lights were out she couldn't see she's not that kind of person do you really not see
15:13how
15:13cool she is or do you just refuse to the great head of the blackwood family can't possibly be too
15:18blind
15:19to see through something this obvious the living room fell silent for several seconds then his phone
15:24rang luna's teary voice leaked through the speaker clearly in the quiet room darian is bianca mad at
15:32me i really didn't mean it i'll apologize tomorrow okay please don't be angry with me don't cry no one's
15:39blaming you he hung up and looked at me she's upset i need to go check on her didn't you
15:44say you had
15:44something to tell me we'll talk properly when i get back he walked to the door changing his shoes
15:49and grabbing his keys he stopped you always say you'll come back and talk to me but when have you
15:56ever actually come back he clearly had no intention of staying i'll be back in an hour without even
16:02turning around darian left i walked into the bedroom and placed the separation agreement beneath
16:07the picture frame then i pulled out my suitcase and called a cab to the airport at one in the
16:12morning
16:12i boarded a flight to london three hours had already passed since darian said he'd come back
16:17to talk as the plane began taxiing a message from him popped up just before i shut my phone off
16:23what's the meaning of that agreement i didn't reply i turned off my phone darian let's never appear in
16:31each other's lives again the plane landed at heathrow when turning on the phone vibrate for several minutes
16:38before stopping i didn't look past customs collected luggage took a taxi the hotel was booked in advance
16:50the front desk handed over the room key i took it elevator up open the door put down the suitcase
16:59sat by the bedside the phone vibrated again i picked it up it's from darian blackword dozens
17:10explain the agreement said we'd talk where did you go don't push it there's a limit to throwing
17:18tantrums bianca are you serious i didn't scroll up locked screen threw it on the nightstand the next
17:29day went to royal free hospital the attending doctor was a beta in his 40s speaking at a moderate pace
17:36mrs reed dr lynn has briefed me we need a full workup before the purification protocol odds better than
17:43last time but the vision loss in your left eye is permanent he glanced at me didn't say more the
17:49nurse took me to handle admission fill out forms the emergency contact act field was blank
17:55who should we put here no one i'm alone she didn't press further left it blank the ward was cramped
18:04the
18:04window faced a busy street the sound of traffic was faint quieter than new york the phone rang it was
18:11darian i picked up i asked dr lynn you went to london his voice was hoary the background was wind
18:17noise from the airport runway he was probably standing on the tar pack darian sign the papers
18:22you flew alone for the purification do you even know your condition then when will you sign
18:28bianca we are really doing this
18:32where do you think we should be fine i'll have luna apologize i admit i neglected you
18:39but you don't have to take it this far i don't need it bianca i'm hanging up sign the papers
18:46i didn't wait for him to say anything more turned off stuffed the phone under the pillow
18:50the phone vibrated under the pillow once then again i didn't take it out
18:56after hanging up the phone darian sat in the study of blackwood estate for a long time
19:00he sank into the leather chair trying to sort out his thoughts why did bianca want to dissolve the
19:05partnership because of luna because he didn't accompany her on the full moon night because he
19:09was always busy he felt these were all small matters he hadn't marked anyone else hadn't
19:16committed domestic violence hadn't frozen her credit card he just didn't care as much anymore
19:21right just didn't care as much in the first two years of marriage he sent her i messages every day
19:28asking if she had eaten asking about the degree of curse flare-ups asking if she missed him
19:32later messages became fewer and fewer not intentional really had nothing to say he felt
19:38this wasn't his fault isn't that how feelings are passion cools novelty exhausts who can still be
19:44like the honeymoon period after eight years of marriage he picked up his phone opened her chat box
19:48dense green bubbles all sent by her the last time he replied to her was half a year ago he
19:54didn't know
19:54when he had developed this habit just didn't want to look her messages were always those few lines
19:59did you eat going into isolation can you come home the doorbell rang he placed his phone face down on
20:05the table and stood up two housekeepers in gray uniforms from beta miss reed arranged for us to
20:12clear out her belongings clothes shoes personal items all to be donated darian stood at the door
20:19stunned for a few seconds she sent you yes ma'am scheduled it last week the two aunts pushed the
20:25cart open the walk-in closet taking down her clothes one by one silk nightgowns cashmere coats scarves he
20:32recognized that off-white max mara coat he had accompanied her to buy it three years ago when she
20:37said she wanted to go sketching in iceland he helped her pick it and those manolo blanick flat shoes
20:42her feet were small hard to buy these were found after browsing seven stores he watched all her things
20:47being folded stacked into black recycling bags wait i'll buy these the aunts left the door closed
20:55the house was dead silent he sat on the sofa holding that coat the phone vibrated again
21:01bianca i want that t-bone steak you make tonight he looked at that message didn't reply a few minutes
21:07later it vibrated again darian are you busy he placed the phone on the coffee table didn't touch it
21:13the sky darkened he didn't turn on the lights sat in the darkness for a long time later he stood
21:18up
21:19walked into the study the safe was hidden behind the bookshelf he entered the password her birthday
21:24pulled it open on top was a moleskine journal
21:29he opened it the first page had a movie ticket stub pasted on it la la land the date was
21:33their first
21:34date she wrote beside it he was 15 minutes late but his hair was flying when he ran in i
21:39forgave him
21:39the second page was a polaroid she wore a knit hat face red from cold she wrote fourth purification
21:45today he said i look cute bald liar but i want to believe him third page fourth page fifth page
21:52every page was her writing characters small crowded together recording every treatment recording the
21:57paths he walked with her recording things he said when i get better we go to tromso for the aurora
22:02you promised so many times i wrote it here so you can't lie the last page of the journal had
22:07an
22:07airplane ticket tucked in it destination tromso next to it was a sticky note in her handwriting when
22:13i get better when you have time let's go don't stand me up again he had simply forgotten he closed
22:20the journal hugged it to his chest the journal was small the cowhide cover pressing against his palm
22:26those characters showed through the paper carrying an aged warmth he only now realized she wrote so much
22:32and he never looked once he picked up his phone booked a flight to london
22:37the purification ritual was scheduled for two weeks later the days in the hospital were very quiet
22:43every morning blood draw every afternoon examination messages from darian kept popping up on my phone
22:49i occasionally swept a glance didn't reply he asked which hospital i was at i deleted the chat box
22:55he said he flew over i still didn't reply the day before the ritual the nurse came for pre-operative
23:01education when signing the informed consent form my hand holding the pen shook a bit turns out not
23:07needing to wait for anyone's signature wasn't as hard as imagined that night there was a torrential
23:11downpour i slept early woken in the middle of the night by knocking opened the door the corridor
23:16light was blinding darian stood in the doorway shirt wrinkled hair messy carrying a rimawa
23:22called a dozen hospitals to find you
23:27signed i won't sign bianca i don't think our marriage is beyond repair
23:32and i don't buy that you feel nothing for me i couldn't be bothered to waste words anymore
23:39darian you overestimate yourself and you underestimate me
23:45there's nothing left to talk about except the divorce
23:49i'm sorry for neglecting you bianca it won't happen again
23:54you never used to think you were wrong i was always the unreasonable one
23:59the past is the past the past was too long
24:03i closed the door he stood in the corridor and didn't leave
24:06i turned off the lights and lay back on the bed
24:08after a long time i heard footsteps gradually fading away
24:14the next day was the surgery before anesthesia dr chin came in to check
24:18the person outside family no the anesthesiologist began pushing the medicine
24:24a chill spread from my arm i closed my eyes when i woke the sky was completely dark
24:30my throat was dry and painful like swallowing sandpaper
24:33the nurse pulled out a tube saying in accented english
24:36surgery was successful i nodded then saw a person sitting by the bedside
24:41darian sat in the chair elbow propped on the bed rail asleep
24:45coat draped over his legs hair messy blue stubble growing on his chin
24:49every time before in surgery after hovering between life and death
24:52i always hoped the first person i saw upon opening my eyes would be him
24:55but every time i woke there was only the pale ceiling
24:58now that he came there was dead water in my heart
25:01i looked at him for a few seconds then turned to look out the window
25:05the london night was deep blue without stars
25:08he woke raising his head
25:10how do you feel doctor said it worked
25:12he didn't mention last night
25:14water didn't mention the agreement didn't mention luna
25:17as if he just happened to pass by dropping by to take a look
25:20when are you leaving i don't want to see you
25:23when you're better he reached out wanting to hold my hand
25:26i withdrew it under the covers i know you're serious this time
25:30i didn't speak i wasn't good enough before
25:34go back i'm tired no energy to argue
25:38he sat there unmoving for a long time the nurse came in to change dressings
25:43only then did he stand up to make way the nurse left
25:46he sat back down i didn't look at him again
25:50the third day post-surgery the wound still hurt but lighter than last time
25:54darian came every day arriving in the morning leaving at night
25:57the nurse thought he was my husband i didn't have the strength to correct her
26:01the fifth day afternoon the ward door was pushed open
26:04luna stood in the doorway light colored coat
26:07long hair loose eye sockets red
26:09that strong strawberry pheromone instantly drowned out the disinfectant smell
26:13she looked at darian darian darian stood up from the sofa frowning
26:17how did you find this place asked around everywhere
26:20darian come back with me okay darian didn't move
26:24i called you so many times you wouldn't answer i went to the house you weren't
26:28there i've been here for days just waiting i messed up i know tell me what to fix
26:34enough he interrupted luna was stunned you know exactly what you did
26:38i didn't say anything before doesn't mean i didn't know
26:41her lips trembled i was for you darian i love you
26:47out you weren't like this you used to protect me did she brainwash you is she
26:52forcing you darian picked up his phone dialed
26:55come in take her out make sure she doesn't come back
26:58as luna was pulled out she was still looking back
27:01her crying voice echoing in the corridor gradually disappearing
27:04the ward returned to silence darian stood with his back to me
27:08after a while he turned around sat back in the chair by the bed
27:12he said sorry did we wake you get some rest
27:15i looked at the ceiling didn't speak
27:19a week later dr chen said still needed observation
27:22but the left eye is gone i know
27:25falling asleep in the ward only the sound of instruments ticking
27:28i turned my head to take a look darian was still there
27:32he was curled on that sofa a size too short macbook on his knees screen lit
27:36but he wasn't looking at it awake i ignored opened my phone
27:40hundreds of messages all from darian every message i sent before the surgery
27:45he had all made up for i'm here i'm sorry i should have been there
27:50i'm here now i looked at a few averted my gaze
27:53you don't have to do this i want to darian it's pointless
28:00you don't have to accept it i just need to do it
28:04he looked at me eyes full of red veins lips chapped
28:07he closed the computer put it back in his pocket
28:09i turned over back to him the curtains weren't drawn tight
28:13a line of light fell on the back of my hand
28:16a month later discharged i booked a ticket to nice france
28:20the day of departure darian stood at the hospital entrance
28:24i'll go with you no need you shouldn't be alone
28:29i was alone before he didn't speak i hailed a taxi
28:33he stood in place wind filling his coat hem
28:35i didn't look back i went to a small town on the cote d'azure
28:39phone on messages poured in darian's dozens hundreds
28:43did you land is the place safe did you pack enough meds
28:47weather cold there did you eat just reply so i know you're safe
28:52half an hour later another it's cold there
28:54where layers i didn't reply he started sending gallery exhibition invitations to
29:00my email paris milan berlin he said his friends in the art circle could help me
29:04hold a solo exhibition he said my art deserved to be seen
29:08reply not interested this isn't compensation
29:11your art is genuinely good he sent another contract
29:15a sponsorship agreement from some international art fund
29:17is this your money or the family offices
29:20he was silent for 10 minutes
29:22you know everything i don't need anything from you anymore
29:25darian the phone rang i picked up
29:28then he asked then what do you want nothing just sign the papers and disappear
29:34bianca wherever you go i'll follow i'll prove i was wrong i love you
29:38follow me to london paris berlin buy a house there i'll move to the next city
29:43buy up all of europe i'll go to the americas africa antarctica
29:47i won't spend my life hating you but i will spend every second of it showing you i don't love
29:51you
29:51anymore you say you want to prove you were wrong i'll prove i never look back
29:56i didn't wait for him to say anything more hung up later he really did follow when i was in
30:02paris
30:02he stayed at a hotel on the other side of the seine i moved to lion he moved too
30:06i stayed in kyoto for a month he rented an apartment nearby
30:09we never spoke occasionally seeing each other from afar on the street
30:13he would stop standing in place watching me walk past
30:18in early winter i went to chamonix at the foot of the alps
30:22the snow was heavy the road slippery i fell skinning my knee
30:26when getting up caught a glimpse of a figure in a dark gray coat at the street corner
30:30he didn't come over that night the snow stopped i sat at the window of the wooden house
30:35my phone lit up his text back then i didn't understand now i do moonlight outside the window
30:41shone on the snow very bright but couldn't sink down i looked at that message for a long time
30:47typed darian stop appearing in each other's lives he didn't reply the next morning the front desk handed
30:53me a letter without a stamp my name was written on the envelope the handwriting his
30:57i took it to the room placed it on the table didn't open it through the envelope could feel
31:03the paper inside probably four or five pages written pulled open the curtains the snow had
31:08cleared sky bright the street was clean he wasn't there he went back in spring i received an email
31:14from the lawyer i booked a ticket back to new york he was already waiting gray brioni suit
31:20neat hairstyle person a bit thinner jawline sharper we stood face to face let's go we sat side
31:26by side before the notary signing the staff member checked stamped all set bianca i looked at him
31:34he opened his mouth adam's apple rolling in the end only said one sentence can i hug you voice very
31:41low the trailing tone swallowed by the echo in the hall he stood before me both hands hanging at his
31:46sides not raised like a person who had lost all chips i looked at his eyes the corner of his
31:51i read
31:51three seconds maybe five i didn't answer turned around didn't look back behind was very quiet he
31:59didn't chase nor did he call my name again pushed open the door the light outside was dazzling left i
32:05couldn't see right i was stung sore by the light i returned to that small town in the south of
32:09france
32:10stayed for a long time snow on the mountaintop hadn't melted flowers at the foot of the mountain
32:15bloomed into a sea sunlight outside the window was dazzling i remembered a long time ago someone said they
32:21would take me to see the aurora in that journal was tucked an airplane ticket destination norway
32:25the date blank not going moonlight cannot sink into the deep sea it shines on the sea surface bright in
32:32one piece shattered in another piece looks very close actually very far just like some people you
32:38thought they loved you but they were just passing by but it doesn't matter the sky will always brighten
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