- 15 hours ago
Johnny Knoxville and the ‘Jackass’ cast (Poopies, Jasper Dolphin, Zach Holmes, Chris Pontius, Ehren McGhehey, Preston Lacy, Dave England) go head-to-head, testing their basic culinary skills. From nut-cracking to juice-squeezing, watch the pranksters battle it out to see who will be crowned the Epicurious Culinary Challenge Champion.
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LifestyleTranscript
00:00Hello, I'm Johnny Knoxville and this is the Epicurious Culinary Challenge.
00:04The cast of Jagass, best and last, will be competing in challenges testing basic culinary skills.
00:10One by one, they will be eliminated.
00:14Who will be the last one standing?
00:19Fruit!
00:20You are a handy juicer, using only your hands.
00:24Pick from an assortment of fruit and squeeze as much juice as possible.
00:28Some fruit have more juice than others.
00:32Choose wisely.
00:34You have one minute.
00:36Players with the least amount of juice are eliminated.
00:43Oh, and also you must eat a pepper before this round.
00:47Choose wisely.
00:49Ready?
00:50Yes!
00:51Yeah, I don't know what I just grabbed.
00:53Red's probably not terrific.
00:54Oh my God!
00:57This is hell.
01:00I'm fine.
01:01Who got this one?
01:03This one's really...
01:04Are they supposed to be...
01:08Oh, f***!
01:10Oh, mother f***er!
01:11Does anyone need milk?
01:15I can do some.
01:17If you're going to puke, puke on Aaron.
01:19This is really spicy.
01:21Does anyone know what mine was?
01:23I feel like Preston got the spiciest thing.
01:27No, he's fine.
01:28Just give him a second.
01:30Oh, it won't go away.
01:34Does anyone want to put one up their butt?
01:36Yeah.
01:36Bring a habanero, please.
01:37Per the request of Epicurious legal counsel, high-level executives, and general holders of good taste,
01:43we are unable to show you this intimate habanero moment with poopies.
01:48But it did sound like this.
01:50Oh, my gosh, that is hot.
01:59All right, here we go.
02:01Wait, you don't have one?
02:03No, that's yours.
02:04That's yours.
02:05Oh.
02:09Sorry, poopies.
02:11Oh, you're fine.
02:12God, getting apples is like a f***ing...
02:14That's not happening.
02:15Oh, man.
02:16I like squeezing grapes, actually.
02:17It's kind of fun.
02:18I like squeezing grapes, too.
02:20Oh, God!
02:21Sorry.
02:22Your buffer didn't work.
02:25You were the buffer?
02:27Look at his hand put it right on my f***.
02:29Look at that.
02:30You got the juice out of that.
02:30Perfectly.
02:31Dave, I think he was supposed to help you get the juice.
02:34They're going to strain it.
02:35Oh.
02:37Okay.
02:38This one's fun to squeeze.
02:40How's the old b-hole?
02:42Oh.
02:43He has to handle it after his gross butt.
02:47Well, I didn't touch it.
02:49Zach did.
02:49Oh, okay.
02:51That's a fair point.
02:52Yeah.
02:52Wow.
02:52Poopies actually did do an excellent job.
02:54He may have won this.
02:55Wow.
02:56I have 2.4 ounces of juice.
02:58Wow, Jasper.
02:59Look at that.
03:00He was calling me Mr. Juice back in the day.
03:02I got 6.2.
03:046.2?
03:05How could he have 2.4 and you have 6.2?
03:08It says 6.2.
03:09What do you want me to do?
03:10You're reading it upside down.
03:11Can we get an official ruling from someone?
03:13Oh.
03:132.9.
03:15I was upside down.
03:17Oh, my God.
03:19Jesus.
03:20Let's go, Zach.
03:22Ooh.
03:232.1.
03:24Hey, hey, hey.
03:25Hey, hey, hey.
03:28Is that legal?
03:29Is that legal?
03:29Is that legal?
03:30I'm just pressing down.
03:31I'm not squeezing.
03:32Bullshit.
03:33Bullshit.
03:33Bullshit.
03:34Okay.
03:34I have 2.3.
03:36That's no good.
03:402.4.
03:41To the camera, please.
03:432.4.
03:452.4.
03:47Chris has got a lot of fruit in there.
03:49He's using his backup.
03:51I got distracted while squeezing.
03:531.7.
03:54Oh, I am a loser.
03:56I mean, I didn't do as good as some of the others.
03:59You didn't want to advance.
04:021.3.
04:05Oh, my God.
04:06He did. Look how much shoes Preston has.
04:08What the hell?
04:09Wow, way to go, Preston.
04:11I think he's in the lead.
04:123.6 ounces.
04:13God damn, he's good.
04:15That's how you cheat.
04:17That's how you cheat.
04:17That's how you cheat.
04:19That's how you cheat.
04:22Oh, my God.
04:24I can't believe it.
04:25Who do I talk to about this?
04:27Oh, my God.
04:30Oh, I think it's looking good.
04:312.5.
04:332.5 ounces.
04:40Oh, come on.
04:43My name is Preston.
04:44I got disqualified for cheating.
04:46He cheated.
04:47He used milk.
04:47It wasn't real.
04:48I lost because I only got 1.3.
04:50Oh, Jesus.
04:51All right.
04:52Gosh, darn it.
04:53My name is Preston.
04:55Ow!
04:59Oh, nuts.
05:01You are a nut crusher.
05:03You have two minutes to crack open and shell as many nuts as possible.
05:08The two players with the least amount of shelled whole nuts will be eliminated.
05:13Ready?
05:15Do you want me to put my nuts on the table?
05:17No, no, no, no, no.
05:18It's not that kind of party, poopies.
05:21Put your finger under here.
05:23Ah!
05:23Yeah, fuck.
05:28Ah!
05:36Ah!
05:37Ah!
05:39Ah!
05:39You're doing pretty good.
05:40What are you doing?
05:42Oh, my gosh, bro.
05:43How many nuts?
05:49Oh!
05:50Oh!
05:50Oh!
05:52Oh!
05:53My pistachios!
05:54Oh!
05:55Oh!
05:56Oh!
05:57Oh!
05:57I missed.
05:59Oh!
05:59Oh!
06:01Oh!
06:03Oh!
06:04Oh!
06:05Oh!
06:07Oh!
06:07Oh, hey, I appreciate you.
06:09Wow.
06:10Looks like you clearly don't have a winner.
06:12There was a little something else going on.
06:14What?
06:15I have one peanut, one pistachio nut, and three nuts.
06:22What's the middle part?
06:23Poopy spelled pistachio.
06:25P-I-S-T-O-C-C-I-A.
06:30Pistachio.
06:30Pretty good.
06:31Did I get that?
06:32Oh, yeah, poopies.
06:33You always get it.
06:34Wow.
06:36You got a lot of turbulence on the way, but I got, I think, two nuts?
06:41Do not want.
06:42What about this one?
06:45Oh.
06:47Oh, my God.
06:48Oh, my God.
06:49Sorry.
06:49Oh, my head.
06:51This is my nuts.
06:54That's technically not even a full one.
06:57That's sad.
06:57Don't be so sad, Zach.
06:59This one's...
06:59Ow!
06:59Sorry.
07:00This one's only a half.
07:01I'm gonna give you one.
07:02Okay.
07:03That was nice.
07:05Yay, Zach.
07:06This would take me to three quarters nuts.
07:10Wow.
07:11They're attacking me.
07:12This is what I have.
07:13I have one nut.
07:15Just like Dave, he's got one nut.
07:17Wow, poopies.
07:19Wow.
07:19Nice.
07:20I got a hazelnut.
07:22I got a peanut.
07:24I call these things pistachio.
07:26Show them that other little hazelnut you got.
07:28Yeah.
07:28Just kidding.
07:30Damn it.
07:31Five whole nuts, Dave.
07:32Well, six whole nuts, really.
07:40I had like a third of a nut, to be honest.
07:44I didn't have a full nut.
07:45What were you doing, dude?
07:46I don't know.
07:48I brought the nuts that I had, and it wasn't a lot.
07:53It wasn't enough.
07:54No.
07:54No, it wasn't.
07:55Well, I'm pretty sore at Zach for interfering with my game.
08:01I'm crestfallen.
08:02What more can be said?
08:03Good job, guys.
08:05Good job, though.
08:08Bubbly.
08:09You are a bubbly stacker.
08:11Put your party goggles on, pop the bubbly, pour the glasses, and stack them high on the
08:21server tray.
08:22One person must hold the tray steady while you work together to build a pyramid.
08:27Eliminated players will try to stop you as best they can.
08:30Team with the highest tower and most filled glasses moves on.
08:35The others are eliminated.
08:37Ready?
08:38Question.
08:39Can I stack, then pour it from the top and let it come down like a waterfall?
08:44I'm just asking.
08:45Just asking.
08:46You guys can choose your teams.
08:48Two and two.
08:50We'll be together.
08:51Old school versus initial.
08:52Oh, yeah.
08:54Jasper's like, anybody?
08:56Yeah.
08:58No, we got this, brother.
09:00Oh, my God.
09:02Whoa, dude.
09:02Here's my strategy.
09:07Let's go.
09:07Well, I'm ready.
09:08Keep going.
09:08I'm calling Dave and Chico Fiesto on this one.
09:11Pop that bottle.
09:12Oh, yeah.
09:13Good job, guys.
09:14Get over there.
09:14Pour, pour, pour, pour, pour.
09:16They're already pouring.
09:17They already got one.
09:19Dave.
09:20Oh.
09:21They've already got one.
09:24Come on, boobies.
09:25Okay.
09:25Wait.
09:26You need more bottles, right?
09:27Uh, ma'am, you should duck.
09:28Boobies.
09:29Boobies.
09:30Hey.
09:30Oh, .
09:31Come on.
09:31We got this.
09:32It's looking real good.
09:34Whoa.
09:35Whoa.
09:36Whoa.
09:37Whoa.
09:38Stop.
09:39Stop.
09:39It's cheating.
09:40You guys are haters.
09:43Sorry.
09:43Sorry.
09:44Jasper's almost, he's got three of them.
09:49Come on, boobies.
09:50I want that one pop.
09:51I don't know.
09:52Jasper, you got three of them.
09:53They're stacking.
09:54They're stacking.
09:54Start stacking.
09:55Start stacking.
09:56What are you doing, boobies?
09:57I got it.
09:58Hachu.
09:59Hachu.
10:01Hachu.
10:02You better stacking.
10:03No winners in this game.
10:06Get fast, fast.
10:07Just go.
10:07I don't know if I'm allowed to stack and hold.
10:09Oh, yeah.
10:09Here, I'll hold it.
10:10Jasper.
10:11I don't think anyone has the drink in them anymore.
10:14Wait.
10:14I got to open this one.
10:15They're going to win, dude.
10:18Focus.
10:19Focus.
10:21Go.
10:24Knock him down.
10:24Knock his down.
10:28You've got one.
10:30Get one more.
10:34Guys, you're really not playing fair.
10:37We won.
10:39You saw that.
10:40We won.
10:40We won.
10:43Okay, judge's decision.
10:45Oh.
10:50Yay.
10:51That's bull .
10:52Yeah.
10:53Old guy.
10:54Who had the last standing class?
10:56Never.
10:56They did.
10:57Yay.
10:59Well, me and my buddy, Poobies, was ripping the competition until some haters came and decided
11:05to knock down my four glass stack.
11:06I was working on my fifth one.
11:08Fifth one.
11:08Yeah.
11:09We got, you know.
11:13Well said.
11:14Well spoken, BG.
11:17So eloquent.
11:18Keep me these glasses though.
11:21Sushi.
11:22You are a sushi master.
11:25Eliminated players will line a body with sushi.
11:27That looks just like Zach.
11:28Yeah, you gotta kinda lay there with your mouth agape, Zach.
11:32When a sushi order is called, the challengers will have to pick up the correct sushi with
11:38their mouth.
11:38Belly button sushi.
11:39The best.
11:40Yes.
11:40First to three points.
11:43Stopped.
11:44The culinary battle champion.
11:46Ready?
11:48You know, I felt like I used poor sportsmanship and I'm going to give my position to one of
11:52you.
11:53Which one wants it?
11:54My paper scissors.
11:55Well, I want it.
11:57Okay.
11:57Go for it.
11:58Yeah.
11:59Wait, let me make this easy for you.
12:01Who's betting on this table?
12:02I'm backing on this s**t too.
12:03It's you too.
12:04Yeah.
12:05Turns out winning's not winning after all.
12:07Just chaos.
12:08Oh boy.
12:09Oh boy.
12:09Oh boy.
12:10There he goes.
12:17You look cool, man.
12:18You really do.
12:20Hey, Zach.
12:21You're making me harder than a folding chair.
12:25Yeah.
12:26All right.
12:28Our finalists.
12:36I will.
12:37That was salmon.
12:38You were slow though.
12:45Get in there.
12:46Get in there.
12:46Get in there.
12:47You're hard.
12:49Oh.
12:50Party.
12:53Party.
12:54You scared me.
12:55You scared me.
12:56You scared me some way.
12:58No, it's not.
12:59Which one's tuna?
12:59Isn't it in the inside?
13:01It wasn't not tuna.
13:02Poopy's got tuna.
13:03Poopy's got tuna.
13:05Poopy's got tuna.
13:05Poopy's got tuna.
13:06I don't see no shrimp.
13:07Look underneath the rolls.
13:10Oh, God.
13:12Jesus.
13:13Oh, God.
13:15Oh, good Lord.
13:17Oh, good Lord.
13:18Oh, God.
13:19That's not fair.
13:20He's in a good size.
13:21Swiss size.
13:22Swiss size.
13:23Swiss size.
13:26Amachi.
13:27On the others.
13:28It is rolled.
13:29Club zero.
13:32Ha-ha!
13:33Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
13:34Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
13:39Oh, God.
13:40Oh, God.
13:41Oh, my God.
13:43Poopy!
13:43Of course he is.
13:45I never win anything so I'm done.
13:48Hey, help Zack off, champ.
13:49Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
13:51Oh, really?
13:51No, no, no, no, no, no.
13:52YAY!
13:52No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
13:56Poopies, you're doing a terrible job of helping him out.
13:59Yeah, I'm trying. He's all over him.
14:00It wasn't really necessary.
14:02That's not winning with class.
14:04That would be the easiest way to get him down.
14:08I got an extra round, but I feel like Poopy's water world,
14:12surf stuff, and sushi just took over,
14:14and that's why he was able to get more sushi than me.
14:17Get ready for some raw wit.
14:21I'm a big fan of Epicurious.
14:24I'm a big fan of Epicurious.
14:26Spell it.
14:27Huh?
14:27Spell Epicurious.
14:29E-P-I-C-U-R-I-O-S.
14:33Wow, Poopies, good job.
14:35Good job, you missed it again.
14:38No way.
14:39Yeah, Poopies.
14:43Stoked.
14:44Real gold.
14:45Thank you guys, thank you.
14:47I'm honored to win,
14:49because I don't win anything, so this is...
14:52Oh, he's choked up.
14:53This is great.
14:54Did he get choked up?
14:56I think so.
14:56Yay.
14:57Don't rush, Poops.
14:58We did it, Poopies.
15:00Okay, Poopies, good job.
15:02Good job.
15:03And this camera first.
15:05Great.
15:06All right.
15:11I hate that thing.
15:13Perfect thing.
15:13Let's keep playing.
15:13Cool.
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