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  • 2 hours ago
Superboy vs. Alien EP
Transcript
00:12let go of the president hand over the nuclear codes or i stick this down your
00:19hey who's hungry for some fried calamari
00:26it's commander z leader of the zenrith league
00:33sup how's your grandpa doing amelia the last time i saved him shoot him
00:58let's get this over with i have a thing later
01:30don't worry buddy i know a really good taylor
01:39you've done it again commander z it took the fbi five years fighting these alien terrorists but it
01:45only took you five months undercover to find them and just five minutes to take him out
01:51told you i have a thing later sir please let me honor you with a public announcement
01:56whoa sir with all due respect
01:59i just want to live my life
02:16as a normal high school senior
02:21sir your tux
02:24fuck i'm gonna be late for our date ivy's gonna be real mad and your flowers
02:32thanks alphonse but i'm gonna need more than this help me get her a good apology present
02:36something fancy okay another gift but you just secretly got her into zenith league
02:49whoa watch it hey i know you like what you're seeing but maybe buy the lady a drink first
02:59wait your cat girl kimmy newly melted rank s superhero man i know you fanboys want my autograph
03:09sorry to disappoint but i have a girlfriend already she's the only superhero for me
03:13oh good because i don't have time to chit chat with nerds you can run along to your girlfriend while
03:18i go save the president
03:19don't sweat it i i already took care of the alien wait took care of the alien you name zeno
03:29that's the next wave of enemies wait i should tell you there's only one way to kill them
03:33who do you think i am i'm cat girl bird's natural predator not those guys
03:36their feathered coats are made of a special metal it's impenetrable go for the inside of their beaks
03:41and how would you know what whatever who is he to tell me how to fight
03:52phew made it right on time
03:58why is there a party here ivy hey anyone seen ivy
04:05ivy i brought you flowers for our dating anniversary and i'm glad you made it zeno
04:11this is my breakup party because i'm dumping you
04:16breaking up we just hit our two you missed the entire half of the school year
04:20i know you're bland and you blend in hang on i'm bland what you've been mixing sriracha with
04:26bees in your drink or something but you're utterly for forgettable now and that's embarrassing me
04:31seriously simps are supposed to try extra hard for your attention he doesn't even try guess he's
04:38a failure at that too excuse me though i'm enjoying the sweet talk this is between me and my girlfriend
04:44stop pretending like you can even protect me or have anything to offer zeno and how would you know
04:50that because i'm gonna be the new face of zenith league i was just recruited by the number one superhero
04:58league in the world as for you class rankings came out already haven't you seen them you missed so
05:05much of mercenary school you missed all the trials to get into the superhero leagues your lowest of the
05:10lows rank z and you know zenith league only takes rank a's and above i can't be seen with you
05:16like this
05:22they're asking me commander z of the entire league to try out for my own team
05:28you don't understand would king kong go to school just to prove he can squash a tiny little bug
05:34i thought so look closely i only score so low so that you ivy don't have to feel so bad
05:41about coming in
05:42last place i didn't ask you to do those things quit trying to guilt trip me i bet even if
05:48your parents
05:48were alive they'd ditch you for a more gifted son too
06:03i kill you just for fun but why waste time on a maggot like you i won't let you get
06:09away with it
06:14that was the day i unlocked my powers and that was when i promised to never let another child go
06:20through the same hell i did my parents died protecting this world don't sell their memories
06:27or what and too bad you didn't inherit your parents super genes otherwise you wouldn't be such a loser
06:33whatever xenon you can stay at the bottom because i've upgraded for someone better someone who can
06:39actually take me to high places hey what's up nerd
06:54you cheated on me ivy
06:58brad has super strength in his rank a zenith league just accepted him he's my real hero oh my god
07:05his
07:05superhero name is the boulder how cool is that and you're just a powerless weakling born to be a loser
07:11ah baby i'm so sore from benching 500 today oh i'll massage them for you looks like i gained another
07:17power invisibility ivy doesn't have to give a damn about you because guess what zenith league is starting
07:23an all-girls special team and ivy is going to be on it that's right it's led by the drop
07:29dead gorgeous
07:29cat girl kimmy and i'm the newest member oh i'm so excited why aren't you applauding you should be
07:36happy i'm making you famous for being my ex-boyfriend that's because i was the one who got you in
07:49that xeno guy was right about birdman's weakness i could have died if it weren't for his intel
07:55whoever he is i must find him you got me into zenith league oh it's almost cute his vocab is
08:06so
08:06limited he doesn't even know the meaning of zenith league i'm commander z the creator and literal
08:11definition of zenith league yeah even i know zenith means top of the top what are those glasses for
08:18anyways keep your mediocrity away from me don't be an idiot xeno you don't even have
08:24powers i only got into zenith league all thanks to brad his dad is the headhunter i see how it
08:31is
08:31your lame excuses aren't doing a very good job covering up your greed and to think i was going
08:35to take you to the top with me not anymore i know you're sensitive and i broke your fragile little
08:39heart but let's face it there's no future with you that's because you're too busy plummeting to
08:44the ground too bad this glorified piece of rock isn't going to save you from the oncoming regret
08:49when you realize that your upgrade is a downgrade i'll show you who's a downgrade
09:10i made a promise to my parents that i was only going to use my powers for good
09:14not petty fights
09:22nobody's ever deflected my punch before much less catch it how did he oh he's so big and strong
09:29they don't call brad the boulder for nothing you fools are made for each other zeno
09:34even being invisible would do you more good than having no powers
09:38i'm sorry for you you can save the pity for yourself you know what this guy's ruined the whole
09:43party i've got a bigger bachelor pod let's head over there here's a lesson before i leave you in
09:47the dust zeno love is for fairy tales even i know that a loser so that's what my first girlfriend
09:56thinks of me huh well joke's on her
10:01because from where i stand i see a hero
10:15that's thanks for helping me take down the enemy
10:18oh you mean the pigeon guys thought you said you had him in the bag miss rank s
10:26i didn't a good cat admits when she's met her better half
10:29guess you're not just some nerd you'd be an asset to zenerith league
10:33how about you become our battle tactician
10:36is that an invite to my own superhero league it is tomorrow's the first day training for new
10:44recruits your ex-girlfriend will be there too i can tell everyone you're my boyfriend
10:48help you get back at her i went from tactician to boyfriend in less than five seconds
10:52that's a little fast i have to think about it i live life on the edge bottoms up boo
10:58this is a good chance to see what my team is actually like i'll stay undercover for this
11:06first training day is like frat rush you'll have to go through a gauntlet of opponents but i bet
11:11you'll have plenty of pointers for our heroes if they're actually any good then they won't need
11:15my help oh you'll be surprised you go in there first i'm going to change i'll be back in a
11:19moment
11:19to introduce you
11:28first training day i'm ready to shoot up some new recruits
11:32new recruits
11:33again you nearly killed everyone in our last batch and a bunch of villagers too
11:36maybe save some fun for me this time huh what the hell i created zenith league so the world's
11:42best superheroes can fight crime and evil together not torment civilians
11:50oh my gosh zenith league even upgraded my weapon for me personally delivered by cat girl kiwi sidekick too
11:57and it's all thanks to you for recommending me brad
12:06butts up towel boy
12:11wait what good dodge kid maybe one day you can be like us
12:17now go wash my dirty laundry they think i'm just a towel boy
12:21this ought to be fun brad i want a rematch for that arm wrestling the other day
12:25oh yeah you want to get whooped again
12:31this what you superheroes do all day getting off on measuring guns and stroking your eagles
12:38xeno what the hell are you doing here this is only for zenith league superheroes and recruits
12:43your technique's all wrong you got to engage your toes oh and never underestimate pinky power
12:49who's this weak looking twig ignore him he's just a powerless loser from mercenary school came
12:53in dead last in class zero powers i can't believe it brad he's so desperate he's stalking
12:58me now that's so creepy ivy aren't you just a new recruit don't talk like you own the place
13:04or i may have to humble you you beat us dude did i hit you too hard on the head
13:10last time you
13:11fucking lost it you're like a helpless puppy on the streets begging for attention you're the one
13:18who's all bark and no bite this isn't a challenge for me because beating you guys would be like
13:22squashing ant that's it four eyes you can only read about how to fight in a textbook but i've got
13:28real
13:28combat experience so let me show you what makes me a real man or maybe i'll teach you a lesson
13:38in
13:39humility give up xenon i know you're desperate to get me back but you have no powers you're not even
13:46good enough to be the towel boy i told you i'm not interested in your petty little games come on
13:49loser you don't even want to fight back after your girl chose me what you scared of course he's scared
13:54brad everyone knows you've got super strength and you're the strongest of our class you're gonna break
13:58his arm in less than a second you keep underestimating me ivy but you're gonna regret it her only regret
14:03is not dumping your nerdy ass earlier now put your arm up and if you don't trigger happy will show
14:07you
14:08a real good time games and powers that's all they care about instead of helping those in need
14:13i really should clean house go on arm up dipshit better use that pinky power you were talking about
14:20if you want to live
14:24three two one go
14:36if you're rank a then what am i
14:42what the hell was that you look scared i thought you were the boulder not very bold are you i
14:49told
14:50you your stance was all wrong nobody has ever beat brad before this this is impossible what kind of
14:58trickery did you pull on me spill it i'd never lose i won fair and square brad who's the sore
15:05loser now
15:12enough no more of this xenon i know i broke your fragile little heart when i dunked you but this
15:16is
15:16no place for your circus act yeah your loser ex-boyfriend just wants to humiliate you in front
15:21of all the heroes at zenith league do you even know what this place is xenon this is the danger
15:27room
15:27the ultimate training arena for zenith lee designed by cat girl kimmy herself is the only rank s female
15:35fighter in the league nobody dares to mess with her well i didn't need those glasses anyways depressed
15:39this whip is the very proof that i belong here yeah your aim really has improved with that new whip
15:43zenith league upgraded it with material that can even burn through an iron wall before you couldn't
15:47even hit an elephant if it was two feet in front of you stop talking down to me i'm a
15:51somebody now
15:51and you're a nobody what are you gonna do actually whip me i'm not your boyfriend anymore or are you
15:55begging me back now that's it i'm getting rid of you once and for all
16:09he caught my whip
16:12this whip is injected with venom too how is he still okay you said you got this whip because
16:17cat girl kimmy recruited you to be on her girl power squad yes and you better watch it
16:23if you can fish in this and you mess with me that's messing with cat girl kimmy
16:30you're an idiot xeno and i thought you were at least book smart all of us here are rank a
16:34heroes
16:34we can pummel you to mush if we wanted to but now you're straight up tempting death cat girl kimmy
16:40skinned her last opponent birdman alive you know that oh yes i heard she told me the whole thing
16:44you see kimiko was the one who invited me today are you kidding me cat girl kimiko is a rank
16:49s hero she
16:50would never be caught with a powerless weaker like you they say only sticks and stones can hurt me
16:55actually nothing can it's time i take back everything i ever gave you and put you in your place i
17:01am
17:08my whip so are we just gonna stand around and talk or are we gonna fight
17:21what was that xeon you'll pay for this brad do something
17:29this all you got all i feel is a light breeze you don't want to play with hellfire
17:38you just look like an ape drenched in kerosene get a grip
17:45hey hey he's getting me trigger happy let's hit him all at once
17:54i want his head
17:56charging
17:58no
17:59no
18:00no
18:01no
18:03no
18:20you just kissed him do you know who that is that's my that's just some nobody from mercenary
18:27school yep my new battle tactician and he's got better moves than everyone in this room
18:33combined he has zero rank he's not even a recruit he's a towel boy he beat your arm in under
18:40a
18:41second anyone else want to debate his qualifications you could have just shaken my hand where's the fun
18:48in that my office five minutes do something oh i'm gonna do something
19:01tonight there's a data heist at the federal tech vault downtown someone's going after zenith league's
19:07classified files how classified identity level real names home addresses every active hero in
19:15the league including mine you'll come as tech support stay in comms range and call the shots
19:20from the outside boomerang and i go in what do we know about the crew hitting the vault
19:30goes by vortex new nobody's faced him yet and walked away with their power intact
19:35he drains supers on contact one touch gone everything one touch so he can only drain one
19:43person at a time yes then don't let him get his hands on both of you at once you keep
19:50him splitting
19:51his attention he can't drain what he can't catch see that's why you're here
20:00meet me at the van in an hour try not to look too smart it's distracting
20:07i built this league to protect people if vortex gets those files every hero i trained is a walking
20:12target
20:16we're in server rooms two floors down three heat signatures ahead of you
20:19vortex is the one hanging back he'll let his crew engage first he waits until you're distracted
20:24look at that he strategizes
20:37boomerang left
20:45now
20:49i can't feel it my power's gone stay down
20:55cat girl rank s i've been looking forward to this
21:01keep him reaching left and key me don't let him back you into a corner
21:04he's counting on that
21:11who's in your ear
21:26interesting nothing to drain or is there something you're hiding
21:38this isn't over
21:40not even close
21:45he felt something that's a problem
21:49boomerang's power will return fully in 48 hours the download was stopped missions a win a win boomerang
21:56got drained. Nobody's ever taken her down before. She'd be completely powerless right now if Kimi
22:00hadn't split his attention. He can only drain one target at a time. That's his limit. That's how
22:05you beat him. He also grabbed our tactist outside the van, tried to drain him. Nothing happened.
22:10Why? Rank Z, remember? Nothing to drain. I want a full background sweep on this guy. School records,
22:17family history, the works. Something doesn't add up. I trust him. That's enough. You've known him
22:22for two days, Kimi. He's got no rank, no powers, and Vortex walked right up to his van like he
22:28knew
22:28exactly who he was looking for. Meeting's over. Xenon. Yeah. You noticed his drain pattern before
22:38we even got inside. I study people. It's what I do. And when his hand was on your wrist,
22:43you didn't flinch. You didn't panic. You were waiting to see what he'd do. Xeno,
22:50is there something you want to tell me? Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon.
23:06Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon.
23:07Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon. Xenon.
23:18Xenon.
23:18One. Can he actually do that? We don't know what his upper limit is. Does anyone here know who
23:27Commander Z is? Commander Z has always operated independently. His identity is classified even
23:36from us. So what do we do? We can't just let Vortex drain all of us. Some of us don't
23:43have
23:43anything to worry about. Rank Z's got no power to drain, right, Xenon? Right. Lucky you.
24:04Nobody bombs every single test. Not this consistently. Not unless they're trying to.
24:21No way.
24:30Oh. Oh, that's why.
25:05He's not waiting for Dawn. Everyone! Full gear, now!
25:17Zeno, get me a plan. If I go out there as Commander Z, everything I built gets blown
25:24open. Everyone I've kept safe. My team. My cover. My life. Gone. But if I don't...
25:34I can feel it! He's pulling! From here!
25:38Zeno, I need a plan. Now! Commander Z, sir, you have to go now. If he completes the drain...
25:47I know, Alphonse.
26:00Commander Z, I know who Commander Z is.
26:05I know who Commander Z is.
26:22Don't move!
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