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Emma spent thirteen years caring for Brian after rescuing him from the Beast Trade, believing their bond meant something. Then one conversation shattered everything she thought she knew.
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Emma spent thirteen years caring for Brian after rescuing him from the Beast Trade, believing their bond meant something. Then one conversation shattered everything she thought she knew.
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00:02Brian and Logan were twin wolf beast kin that my cousin Isabella and I rescued from the
00:08underground beast trade back then the two of us stood there staring at those filthy little wolf
00:13pups and without even needing to say much we each decided to adopt one I took Brian Isabella took
00:19Logan 13 years passed in the blink of an eye all that time I believe that even if Brian didn't
00:25like
00:25me he would at least feel grateful that I had saved his life that illusion shattered
00:29the day I accidentally overheard him talking to some other beast kin someone asked Emma's been
00:37really good to you why are you always so cold to her who asked her to be good to me
00:43you've got it
00:44good and don't even realize it good then I guess I should thank Emma properly if she hadn't taken me
00:50first me'd be the one with Isabella right now I mean makes sense compared to Isabella the head
00:55cheerleader Emma's just nothing special a dull ache spread through my chest every feeling I had held
01:01on to for Brian over the years quietly disappeared when I got home I sat on the living room couch
01:06until
01:06well past midnight again and again I picked up a mirror staring at the girl reflected in it I had
01:12always thought I looked average but now the longer I looked the worse it seemed with a surge of disgust
01:18I tossed the mirror aside all I could see in my mind was Isabella's radiant effortless smile
01:23I lowered my head and let the weight of my own insecurity swallow me home the sound of the front
01:27door opening broke the silence Brian walked in reeking of bourbon barely sparing me a glance before turning
01:33toward his bedroom I wiped my tears with the back of my hand and stood up for the first time
01:37I reached
01:37out trying to grab his tail my hand was immediately slapped away he stepped back his face full of irritation
01:43don't touch me it was exactly the same reaction as the first time I had tried to touch his wolf
01:48ears
01:49even after I had taken him in and cared for him with everything I had for 13 years a bitter
01:54laugh
01:55slipped out of me so if you're not pretty even your sincerity isn't worth anyone taking seriously
02:00I didn't even notice when my tears began to fall one by one onto the hardwood floor by the time
02:05I
02:05looked up again I was alone in the living room my thoughts drifted as they always did back to high
02:10school and the annual fall homecoming carnival I used to bring a big box of Texas's barbecue
02:15and find Brian in the backyard Brian will you come to the carnival with me this year
02:20he'd lift his head out of the pool water dripping from his hair no but a lot of people bring
02:26their
02:26bee skin with them no if you want someone to go with you go adopt another one from the shelter
02:32so every year I went alone I would stand off to the side watching Logan who had the exact same
02:38face
02:39as Brian yet always wore the gentlest smile he would ruffle Isabella's hair and ask
02:44Isabella do you want that teddy bear she'd nod with a bright smile rising onto her toes to reach
02:50for his wolf ears and Logan would always bend down for her patient and indulgent I watched him like
02:56a thief quietly craving the life Isabella had but one time Jason a few of his buddies shoved me onto
03:01the
03:02grass his voice was dripping with mockery well look who it is Emma a straight A nerd where's your
03:08little bee skin didn't feel like coming out with you one of his friends snickered her bee skin and
03:13Isabella's are twin wolves right the older one ended up with the prom queen and the younger one got stuck
03:19with an ugly duckling I refused to back down gritting my teeth I pushed myself up and swung my fist
03:24straight
03:25at his friend's face he went down hard before he could even react Chase lunged at me trying to fight
03:30back
03:30but I slammed him to the ground and kept hitting him until someone finally pulled me off the end
03:35result was predictable all of us were called into the principal's office I thought my mom would be
03:39on my side instead right in front of the principal and Chase she sighed in annoyance honestly what were
03:44you thinking they weren't even wrong why would you hit someone over that I tugged lightly at the sleeve
03:48of her coat mom I said barely above a whisper she acted like she didn't hear me let's be real
03:53she went
03:54on you're not exactly pretty and now you've got this terrible temper too even the bee skin you raise
03:58doesn't care about you I don't know how I ended up with a daughter like you sometimes I wish Isabella
04:03were my child instead that night I cried my eyes out in Central Park when I finally went home my
04:07father
04:07greeted me with a sharp slap across the face he said I closed my eyes and fell into a heavy
04:15sleep my
04:15messed up schedule left my mind blank when I woke up again when I pushed the door open I realized
04:20it was
04:20already dusk Brian was out but his presence lingered everywhere in the apartment I grabbed a slice of pizza and
04:26forced myself to eat then started packing up everything that belonged to me there wasn't much
04:30really after I got into college at 18 I was afraid my parents would treat Brian badly so I took
04:35him
04:35with me at my poorest I could only afford a run-down studio apartment he slept on the bed and
04:41I took
04:42the couch Brian was well over six feet tall and he would bump his head every time he walked through
04:46the low doorway so I worked non-stop picking up every part-time job I could find until I finally
04:51saved
04:51enough for a down payment on a small two-bedroom townhouse love has a way of making you feel like
04:56you owe everything so I bought Brian more things than he could ever need I never once considered
05:01that he didn't want any of it this time I decided to give him what he actually wanted freedom after
05:05I
05:05finished packing I walked out of the home Brian and I had shared the next morning when the staff at
05:10the Bureau of Non-Human Affairs asked me for the third time if I was sure I wanted to terminate
05:14my bond
05:15with Brian I still nodded when a human dissolves a bond unilaterally financial compensation is
05:19required I left the townhouse to him at the office Emily handed me the bond termination certificate
05:25then hesitated before asking Miss Emma would you like to give this to Mr. Brian in person or should
05:29we mail it on your behalf I took out the letter I had rewritten over and over again the night
05:33before
05:33please mail it to him I said and include this there were only two sentences in the letter I am
05:39sorry
05:39Brian I took you away without your consent so this time I am giving your freedom back to you I
05:44walked out
05:44of City Hall got into my car and left Los Angeles behind my new life would begin in Florida somewhere
05:50by the ocean waiting for warmer days ahead since my new job was as a lecturer at a university in
05:55Miami
05:55I rented a small beach house with a yard the evening sea breeze carried a faint salty smell as I
06:00walked
06:00along the shore wearing a mask the orange glow of the sunset was just right soft and beautiful I took
06:05a
06:05photo then out of habit opened my iMessage chat with Brian scrolling up it was nothing but messages from me
06:10photos of little trinkets I found at vintage markets strange shaped clouds in the sky
06:14the slow growth of a sunflower he rarely replied most of the time all I ever got back was a
06:20short
06:20dismissive yeah the last message in our chat was from the day I heard the truth I had asked him
06:25where are you I can come pick you up he never replied by then he must have already received
06:30the bond termination certificate and still he could not even bring himself to say goodbye all that was
06:35left in my chest was a dull spreading ache after thinking it over I realized my new life should not
06:40be
06:40tied to the past so I changed my phone number deleted my old Instagram and created a new account
06:45I packed my schedule as full as possible just to earn a few nights of uninterrupted sleep some of the
06:50more outgoing college girls like to chat with me between classes professor Emma why do you always wear
06:55a mask on campus because I'm not very pretty who said that oh my god I swear I will shut
07:00them up there is
07:01no such thing as an ugly girl she sounded completely sincere and the others around her nodded in agreement just
07:07as
07:07indignant I would laugh it off and smoothly change the subject soon enough they started talking about
07:12the beeskin they had at home then they asked me professor what kind of beeskin do you have I did
07:16not know how to explain everything that had happened with Brian so I gave them a simple answer he died
07:21they fell silent for a long moment until the bell rang and class began after that during my two weekly
07:26lectures students would often bring me little things a Starbucks latte a blueberry muffin or a bar of
07:31Hershey's chocolate I could never finish it all that was when I started thinking about the little
07:35fox beeskin on campus who survived by collecting recyclables beeskin were usually striking in
07:40appearance and fox beeskin were among the most beautiful of all but this one had deep crisscrossing
07:45scars covering both sides of his face he was afraid of scaring the students so he only came out late
07:50at night that evening when I left the lab and went looking for him it started pouring out of nowhere
07:55a
07:55figure darted toward me a fluffy foxtail swaying behind him I called out softly hey little fox huh the young
08:02beastkin turned around and noticed me immediately lowering his head he quickly covered his face with
08:07his hands I'm sorry ma'am I must have misheard please don't mind me the autumn rain carried a sharp
08:12chill he was soaked through water dripping steadily from his clothes I looked at him and said gently you
08:17don't have to hide your face I've seen you around I have hot water and a dryer in my office
08:21come upstairs
08:22and get warmed up he hesitated then slowly lowered his hands and nodded thank you ma'am once we got
08:27into my
08:27office under the bright lights I realized how young he was around 18 or 19 about the same age as
08:33my
08:33freshman while he was showering I went next door to the lab to ask about him my colleague Arthur was
08:39always eager to talk and he filled me in without hesitation that little fox is named Finn I heard he
08:44used to be incredibly good looking his former handler tried to sell him to the red light district in the
08:49underground beast trade he refused and even bit someone before escaping during the escape his face got
08:54slashed up when the people from the black market saw he was disfigured they beat him badly and threw
08:59him into the ocean lucky for him the university rowing team pulled him out since then he's been
09:04scraping by on campus selecting recyclables I asked where does he live there's a rundown shed behind the
09:09hill on campus Arthur frowned slightly Emma I heard your bee skin passed away you're not thinking about
09:14adopting him are you I bit down on the straw of my hot latte and didn't answer Arthur's voice suddenly
09:19sharpened he looks like that who would want to adopt him his words overlapped with the voices from my
09:23past she looks so plain who would ever like her but why we have hearts too we want to love
09:28and be
09:29loved just the same I looked at Arthur and said quietly he isn't ugly he's just been hurt and
09:34he's kind he's sweet I've seen him share the food he collects with homeless people nearby I've seen him
09:39donate his spare change to the beastkin protection agency so please don't say things like that about him
09:44again when I stepped out of Arthur's office I saw Finn standing in the hallway his blonde hair and tail
09:49were
09:49still damp his eyes were brimming with tears feeling a little awkward I changed the subject
09:53if it's hard to do it yourself I can help dry it I took the towel and gently dried his
09:57hair and tail
09:58then used a hair dryer to finish the job it was my first time drying a bee skin's tail and
10:03I was clumsy
10:03I accidentally hurt him more than once and kept apologizing Finn's face turned red it's okay I'm
10:09already very grateful to you when I finally finished I handed him a muffin and the latte he didn't take
10:14them after a long pause as if gathering all his courage he spoke again ma'am I don't eat much
10:19could
10:20you adopt me my hand froze mid-air Finn continued I know I'm not good-looking but I can cook
10:25wash
10:26dishes mow the lawn I can get massages and I know how to grow roses I smiled then took off
10:30my mask and
10:31met his eyes but I'm not good-looking either would you still choose me Finn gently reached out and touched
10:36my cheek his movements careful almost reverent you're very cute he said softly I want to go with
10:43you my eyes stung I blinked quickly holding back the tears and took his hand as we walked out of
10:48the
10:48lab building together the rain had stopped and just like that I chose a family for myself I completed the
10:53paperwork and adopted Finn just like he promised he did everything beautifully he kept the beach house
10:58spotless filled the yard with blooming hydrangeas and brought me hot home-cooked lunches at the lab
11:03running those spectral analyses today nearly killed me Arthur said as he wandered in from next door
11:08shamelessly helping himself he took a big spoonful of beef stew and let out a low whistle damn Finn can
11:14cook this is incredible meanwhile the one at my place does nothing but curl up on the couch and watch
11:19Netflix honestly Arthur should have been grateful Brianne could not cook at all then again maybe he just
11:24never bothered to do anything like that for me that night I had the nightmare again a memory buried deep
11:30in my mind I was 17 Isabella and Logan went with me and Brian to Universal Studios Orlando
11:36halfway through the day the park was hit by a sudden indiscriminate attack explosions erupted from every
11:42direction Logan shielded Isabella while I grabbed Brianne's hand and ran for the exit we were near the eastern
11:48side of the park but the flying debris still cut into everyone we were only steps away from the exit
11:54when it was blown
11:55apart right in front of us at the time I had been running ahead and never noticed what happened in
11:59that instant but in the dream I saw it clearly both Logan and Brianne threw themselves toward Isabella
12:05without hesitation I was left alone collapsing into rubble and dust with no one caring whether I lived or
12:11died Logan and Brianne were only relieved that Isabella was safe later I lay unconscious in the ICU for days
12:17my
12:17parents and Brianne stayed by Isabella's side comforting her as she cried from the shock a voice echoed in my
12:23mind
12:23mocking me Emma C no one in this world loves you it came from everywhere repeating itself over and over
12:30surrounding me until I could not escape it in the dream my soul seemed to float above crouch down
12:35clutching my head as I tried to argue back that's not true that's not true then faintly someone grabbed
12:43my hand and pulled me forward a voice said Emma that's not true everyone deserves to be loved I woke
12:49with a start
12:49the first thing I saw was Finn sitting at my bedside wiping the cold sweat from my forehead his face
12:55tight
12:55with worry when he saw my eyes open he finally let out a breath tears slipped down my face before
13:00I could
13:01stop them Finn can you hold me he climbed onto the bed and pull me into his arms I clung
13:06to him like a
13:06child pouring out everything I had been holding inside Finn gently patted my back murmuring soft reassurances
13:12I did not have to worry about him snapping at me to leave him alone I did not have to
13:16worry about him
13:17brushing me off and disappearing into distractions and I definitely did not have to worry about him
13:21looking at me with cold indifference I want to hear a song I whispered Finn hummed softly you are my
13:26sunshine my only sunshine you make me happy when skies are gray with Finn taking care of me I started
13:33getting better little by little the sunlight was especially bright today Finn and I were in the
13:38backyard hanging sheets out to dry we ended up laughing and playing around on either side of the fabric
13:43the breeze lifting it between us then someone called my name from beyond the fence
13:47Emma I turned around Brian was standing there the hanger slipped from my hand and fell straight onto
13:52the grass Finn noticed the shift in my expression immediately and stepped in front of me without
13:57hesitation I tugged lightly on the hem of Finn's flannel shirt it's okay I know him go take care of
14:03the
14:03blue crabs in the kitchen I just need a minute to talk to him we walked over to a wooden
14:07bench by the
14:07shore the ocean breeze tangled my hair I forced a small awkward smile it's been a while Brian he
14:13stared at me his voice called who is that Fox my new fostered bee skin
14:30Brian and Logan were twin wolf bees kin that my cousin Isabella and I rescued from the underground
14:36bees trade back then the two of us stood there staring at those filthy little wolf pups and without
14:42even needing to say much we each decided to adopt one I took Brian Isabella took Logan 13 years passed
14:48in the blink of an eye all that time I believe that even if Brian didn't like me he would
14:53at least feel
14:54grateful that I had saved his life that illusion shattered the day I accidentally overheard him
15:00talking to some other bee skin someone asked Emma's been really good to you why are you always so
15:07cold to her who asked her to be good to me you've got it good and don't even realize it
15:14good then I
15:15guess I should thank Emma properly if she hadn't taken me first me'd be the one with Isabella right
15:19now I mean makes sense compared to Isabella the head cheerleader Emma's just nothing special a dull
15:25ache spread through my chest every feeling I had held on to for Brian over the years quietly disappeared
15:31when I got home I sat on the living room couch until well past midnight again and again I picked
15:37up a mirror staring at the girl reflected in it I had always thought I looked average but now the
15:42longer I looked the worse it seemed with a surge of disgust I tossed the mirror aside all I could
15:48see in my mind was Isabella's radiant effortless smile I lowered my head and let the weight of my
15:52own insecurity swallow me home the sound of the front door opening broke the silence Brian walked in
15:58reeking of bourbon barely sparing me a glance before turning toward his bedroom I wiped my tears
16:02with the back of my hand and stood up for the first time I reached out trying to grab his
16:06tail my hand
16:07was immediately slapped away he stepped back his face full of irritation don't touch me it was exactly
16:13the same reaction as the first time I had tried to touch his wolf ears even after I had taken
16:18him in
16:18and cared for him with everything I had for 13 years a bitter laugh slipped out of me so if
16:24you're not
16:24pretty even your sincerity isn't worth anyone taking seriously I didn't even notice when my
16:29tears began to fall one by one onto the hardwood floor by the time I looked up again I was
16:34alone in
16:35the living room my thoughts drifted as they always did back to high school and the annual fall homecoming
16:40carnival I used to bring a big box of Texas's barbecue and find Brian in the backyard Brian will
16:46you come to the carnival with me this year he'd lift his head out of the pool water dripping from
16:51his
16:51hair no but a lot of people bring their bee skin with them no if you want someone to go
16:57with you
16:58go adopt another one from the shelter so every year I went alone I would stand off to the side
17:04watching Logan who had the exact same face as Brian yet always wore the gentlest smile he would
17:10ruffle Isabella's hair and ask Isabella do you want that teddy bear she'd nod with a bright smile
17:16rising onto her toes to reach for his wolf ears and Logan would always bend down for her patient and
17:22indulgent I watched him like a thief quietly craving the life Isabella had but one time
17:27Jason a few of his buddies shoved me onto the grass his voice was dripping with mockery well look who
17:33it
17:33is Emma a straight day nerd where's your little bee skin didn't feel like coming out with you one of
17:39his friends snickered her bee skin and Isabella's are twin wolves right the older one ended up with
17:44the prom queen and the younger one got stuck with an ugly duckling I refused to back down gritting my
17:50teeth I pushed myself up and swung my fist straight at his friend's face he went down hard before he
17:55could even react Chase lunged at me trying to fight back but I slammed him to the ground and kept
18:00hitting
18:00him until someone finally pulled me off the end result was predictable all of us were called into the
18:05principal's office I thought my mom would be on my side instead right in front of the principal and
18:09Chase she sighed in annoyance honestly what were you thinking they weren't even wrong why would you
18:14hit someone over that I tugged lightly at the sleeve of her coat mom I said barely above a whisper
18:19she
18:19acted like she didn't hear me let's be real she went on you're not exactly pretty and now you've got
18:23this terrible temper too even the beast can you raise doesn't care about you I don't know how I ended
18:28up with a daughter like you sometimes I wish Isabella were my child instead that night I cried my eyes
18:33out in
18:33central park when I finally went home my father greeted me with a sharp slap across the face
18:37he said I closed my eyes and fell into a heavy sleep my messed up schedule left my mind blank
18:45when
18:45I woke up again when I pushed the door open I realized it was already dusk Brian was out but
18:50his
18:50presence lingered everywhere in the apartment I grabbed a slice of pizza and forced myself to eat
18:55then started packing up everything that belonged to me there wasn't much really after I got into college
18:59at 18 I was afraid my parents would treat Brian badly so I took him with me at my poorest
19:05I could
19:06only afford a run-down studio apartment he slept on the bed and I took the couch Brian was well
19:11over
19:11six feet tall and he would bump his head every time he walked through the low doorway so I worked
19:15non-stop picking up every part-time job I could find until I finally saved enough for a down payment
19:20on a small two-bedroom townhouse love has a way of making you feel like you owe everything so I
19:25bought
19:26Brian more things than he could ever need I never once considered that he didn't want any of it
19:30this time I decided to give him what he actually wanted freedom after I finished packing I walked
19:34out of the home Brian and I had shared the next morning when the staff at the Bureau of Non
19:38-Human
19:39Affairs asked me for the third time if I was sure I wanted to terminate my bond with Brian I
19:43still
19:43nodded when a human dissolves a bond unilaterally financial compensation is required I left the townhouse
19:49to him at the office Emily handed me the bond termination certificate then hesitated before asking
19:54Miss Emma would you like to give this to Mr. Brian in person or should we mail it on your
19:58behalf
19:58I took out the letter I had rewritten over and over again the night before please mail it to him
20:02I said and include this there were only two sentences in the letter I am sorry Brian I took
20:07you away without your consent so this time I am giving your freedom back to you I walked out of
20:12City Hall got into my car and left Los Angeles behind my new life would begin in Florida somewhere by
20:18the
20:18ocean waiting for warmer days ahead since my new job was as a lecturer at a university in Miami
20:23I rented a small beach house with the yard the evening sea breeze carried a faint salty smell
20:27as I walked along the shore wearing a mask the orange glow of the sunset was just right soft and
20:32beautiful I took a photo then out of habit open my I message chat with Brian scrolling up it was
20:37nothing but messages from me photos of little trinkets I found at vintage markets strange shaped
20:41clouds in the sky the slow growth of a sunflower he rarely replied most of the time all I ever
20:47got back
20:47was a short dismissive yeah the last message in our chat was from the day I heard the truth I
20:52had
20:52asked him where are you I can come pick you up he never replied by then he must have already
20:57received
20:58the bond termination certificate and still he could not even bring himself to say goodbye all that was
21:02left in my chest was a dull spreading ache after thinking it over I realized my new life should not
21:08be
21:08tied to the past so I changed my phone number deleted my old Instagram and created a new account I
21:13packed my
21:13schedule as full as possible just to earn a few nights of uninterrupted sleep some of the more
21:18outgoing college girls like to chat with me between classes professor Emma why do you always wear a mask
21:23on campus because I'm not very pretty who said that oh my god I swear I will shut them up
21:28there is no
21:29such thing as an ugly girl she sounded completely sincere and the others around her nodded in agreement
21:34just as indignant I would laugh it off and smoothly change the subject soon enough they started talking
21:39about the beeskin they had at home then they asked me professor what kind of beeskin do you have I
21:44did
21:44not know how to explain everything that had happened with Brian so I gave them a simple answer he died
21:49they fell silent for a long moment until the bell rang and class began after that during my two weekly
21:54lectures students would often bring me little things a starbucks latte a blueberry muffin or a bar of
21:59hershey's chocolate I could never finish it all that was when I started thinking about the little fox
22:03beeskin on campus who survived by collecting recyclables beeskin were usually striking an appearance
22:08and fox beeskin were among the most beautiful of all but this one had deep crisscrossing scars
22:13covering both sides of his face he was afraid of scaring the students so he only came out late at
22:18night
22:18that evening when I left the lab and went looking for him it started pouring out of nowhere a figure
22:23darted toward me a fluffy foxtail swaying behind him I called out softly hey little fox huh the young
22:30beeskin turned around and noticed me immediately lowering his head he quickly covered his face with his hands
22:35I'm sorry ma'am I must have misheard please don't mind me the autumn rain carried a sharp chill he
22:40was soaked
22:41through water dripping steadily from his clothes I looked at him and said gently you don't have to hide your
22:45face
22:46I've seen you around I have hot water and a dryer in my office come upstairs and get warmed up
22:51he hesitated
22:51then slowly lowered his hands and nodded thank you ma'am once we got into my office under the bright
22:56lights I realized
22:57how young he was around 18 or 19 about the same age as my freshman while he was showering I
23:03went next door
23:03to the lab to ask about him my colleague Arthur was always eager to talk and he filled me in
23:09without hesitation
23:09that little fox is named Finn I heard he used to be incredibly good looking his former handler tried to
23:15sell him to the red light district in the underground beast trade
23:17he refused and even bit someone before escaping during the escape his face got slashed up when the people from
23:23the black market saw he was disfigured
23:25they beat him badly and threw him into the ocean lucky for him the university rowing team pulled him out
23:30since then
23:31he's been scraping by on campus selecting recyclables I asked where does he live there's a rundown shed behind the
23:37hill on campus Arthur frowned slightly
23:39Emma I heard your beeskin passed away you're not thinking about adopting him are you I bit down on the
23:44straw of my hot latte and didn't answer
23:46Arthur's voice suddenly sharpened he looks like that who would want to adopt him his words overlapped with the voices
23:51from my past
23:52she looks so plain who would ever like her but why we have hearts too we want to love and
23:56be loved just the same
23:57I looked at Arthur and said quietly he isn't ugly he's just been hurt and he's kind he's sweet I've
24:03seen him share the food he collects with homeless people nearby
24:06I've seen him donate his spare change to the beastkin protection agency so please don't say things like that about
24:12him again
24:12when I stepped out of Arthur's office I saw Finn standing in the hallway his blonde hair and tail were
24:17still damp his eyes were brimming with tears feeling a little awkward
24:20I changed the subject if it's hard to do it yourself I can help dry it I took the towel
24:24and gently dried his hair and tail then used a hair dryer to finish the job
24:28it was my first time drying a beeskin's tail and I was clumsy I accidentally hurt him more than once
24:33and kept apologizing Finn's face turned red
24:35it's okay I'm already very grateful to you when I finally finished I handed him a muffin and the latte
24:41he didn't take them after a long pause as if gathering all his courage he spoke again
24:45ma'am I don't eat much could you adopt me my hand froze mid-air Finn continued I know I'm
24:52not good looking but I can cook wash dishes mow the lawn I can get massages and I know how
24:56to grow roses
24:57I smiled then took off my mask and met his eyes but I'm not good looking either would you still
25:01choose me Finn gently reached out and touched my cheek
25:04his movements careful almost reverent you're very cute he said softly I want to go with you
25:11my eyes stung I blinked quickly holding back the tears and took his hand as we walked out of the
25:16lab
25:16building together the rain had stopped and just like that I chose a family for myself I completed the
25:21paperwork and adopted Finn just like he promised he did everything beautifully he kept the beach house
25:26spotless filled the yard with blooming hydrangeas and brought me hot home cooked lunches at the lab running
25:31those spectral analyses today nearly killed me Arthur said as he wandered in from next door shamelessly helping
25:37himself he took a big spoonful of beef stew and let out a low whistle damn Finn can cook this
25:42is
25:42incredible meanwhile the one at my place does nothing but curl up on the couch and watch Netflix honestly
25:47Arthur should have been grateful Brianne could not cook at all then again maybe he just never bothered to do
25:53anything like that for me that night I had the nightmare again a memory buried deep in my mind
25:59I was 17 Isabella and Logan went with me and Brian to Universal Studios Orlando halfway through the day
26:05the park was hit by a sudden indiscriminate attack explosions erupted from every direction
26:10Logan shielded Isabella while I grabbed Brian's hand and ran for the exit we were near the eastern side of
26:16the park but the flying debris still cut into everyone we were only steps away from the exit
26:22when it was blown apart right in front of us at the time I had been running ahead and never
26:26noticed
26:26what happened in that instant but in the dream I saw it clearly both Logan and Brian threw themselves
26:32toward Isabella without hesitation I was left alone collapsing into rubble and dust with no one caring
26:38whether I lived or died Logan and Brian were only relieved that Isabella was safe later I lay unconscious
26:43in the ICU for days my parents and Brian stayed by Isabella's side comforting her as she cried from
26:49the shock a voice echoed in my mind mocking me Emma C no one in this world loves you it
26:55came from
26:55everywhere repeating itself over and over surrounding me until I could not escape it in the dream my soul
27:01seemed to float above crouch down clutching my head as I tried to argue back that's not true that's not
27:07true
27:07then faintly someone grabbed my hand and pulled me forward a voice said Emma that's not true everyone
27:15deserves to be loved I woke with a start the first thing I saw was Finn sitting at my bedside
27:20wiping the
27:21cold sweat from my forehead his face tight with worry when he saw my eyes open he finally let out
27:26a breath
27:27tears slipped down my face before I could stop them Finn can you hold me he climbed onto the bed
27:32and pull me
27:32into his arms I clung to him like a child pouring out everything I had been holding inside Finn gently
27:37patted my back murmuring soft reassurances I did not have to worry about him snapping at me to leave
27:42him alone I did not have to worry about him brushing me off and disappearing into distractions and I
27:47definitely did not have to worry about him looking at me with cold indifference I want to hear a song
27:51I whispered Finn hummed softly you are my sunshine my only sunshine you make me happy when skies are gray
27:58with Finn taking care of me I started getting better little by little the sunlight was especially
28:04bright today Finn and I were in the backyard hanging sheets out to dry we ended up laughing and playing
28:09around on either side of the fabric the breeze lifting it between us then someone called my name
28:14from beyond the fence Emma I turned around Brian was standing there the hanger slipped from my hand and
28:19fell straight onto the grass Finn noticed the shift in my expression immediately and stepped in front of
28:25me without hesitation I tugged lightly on the hem of Finn's flannel shirt it's okay I know him go take
28:30care of the blue crabs in the kitchen I just need a minute to talk to him we walked over
28:34to a wooden
28:35bench by the shore the ocean breeze tangled my hair I forced a small awkward smile it's been a while
28:40Brian
28:40he stared at me his voice cold who is that fox my new fostered bee skin
28:58Brian and Logan were twin wolf beast kin that my cousin Isabella and I rescued from the underground
29:04beast trade back then the two of us stood there staring at those filthy little wolf pups and without
29:10even needing to say much we each decided to adopt one I took Brian Isabella took Logan 13 years passed
29:16in the blink of an eye all that time I believe that even if Brian didn't like me he would
29:21at least feel
29:22grateful that I had saved his life that illusion shattered the day I accidentally overheard him
29:28talking to some other bee skin someone asked Emma's been really good to you why are you always
29:34so cold to her who asked her to be good to me you've got it good and don't even realize
29:42it good then I
29:43guess I should thank Emma properly if she hadn't taken me first me'd be the one with Isabella right now
29:47I mean makes sense compared to Isabella the head cheerleader Emma's just nothing special a dull
29:53ache spread through my chest every feeling I had held on to for Brian over the years quietly disappeared
29:59when I got home I sat on the living room couch until well past midnight again and again I picked
30:05up a mirror staring at the girl reflected in it I had always thought I looked average but now the
30:10longer
30:10I looked the worse it seemed with a surge of disgust I tossed the mirror aside all I could see
30:16in my
30:16mind was Isabella's radiant effortless smile I lowered my head and let the weight of my own
30:20insecurity swallow me home the sound of the front door opening broke the silence Brian walked in
30:25reeking of bourbon barely sparing me a glance before turning toward his bedroom I wiped my tears with the
30:31back of my hand and stood up for the first time I reached out trying to grab his tail my
30:35hand was
30:35immediately slapped away he stepped back his face full of irritation don't touch me it was exactly
30:41the same reaction as the first time I had tried to touch his wolf ears even after I had taken
30:45him
30:46in and cared for him with everything I had for 13 years a bitter laugh slipped out of me so
30:51if you're
30:52not pretty even your sincerity isn't worth anyone taking seriously I didn't even notice when my tears
30:57began to fall one by one onto the hardwood floor by the time I looked up again I was alone
31:03in the
31:03living room my thoughts drifted as they always did back to high school and the annual fall homecoming
31:08carnival I used to bring a big box of Texas's barbecue and find Brian in the backyard Brian will
31:14you come to the carnival with me this year he'd lift his head out of the pool water dripping from
31:19his
31:19hair no but a lot of people bring their bee skin with them no if you want someone to go
31:25with you go
31:26adopt another one from the shelter so every year I went alone I would stand off to the side watching
31:32Logan who had the exact same face as Brian yet always wore the gentlest smile he would ruffle
31:38Isabella's hair and ask Isabella do you want that teddy bear she'd nod with a bright smile rising onto
31:45her toes to reach for his wolf ears and Logan would always bend down for her patient and indulgent I
31:51watched him like a thief quietly craving the life Isabella had but one time Jason a few of his buddies
31:56shoved me onto the grass his voice was dripping with mockery well look who it is Emma a straight
32:03day nerd where's your little bee skin didn't feel like coming out with you one of his friends snickered
32:08her bee skin and Isabella's are twin wolves right the older one ended up with the prom queen and the
32:13younger one got stuck with an ugly duckling I refused to back down gritting my teeth I pushed myself up
32:19and
32:19swung my fist straight at his friend's face he went down hard before he could even react Chase
32:24lunged at me trying to fight back but I slammed him to the ground and kept hitting him until someone
32:29finally pulled me off the end result was predictable all of us were called into the principal's office
32:33I thought my mom would be on my side instead right in front of the principal and Chase she sighed
32:38in
32:38annoyance honestly what were you thinking they weren't even wrong why would you hit someone over that I
32:43tugged lightly at the sleeve of her coat mom I said barely above a whisper she acted like she didn't
32:48hear me
32:48let's be real she went on you're not exactly pretty and now you've got this terrible temper too
32:52even the bee skin you raised doesn't care about you I don't know how I ended up with a daughter
32:56like you sometimes I wish Isabella were my child instead that night I cried my eyes out in Central
33:01Park when I finally went home my father greeted me with a sharp slap across the face he said
33:08I closed my eyes and fell into a heavy sleep my messed up schedule left my mind blank when I
33:13woke up again
33:14when I pushed the door open I realized it was already dusk Brian was out but his presence
33:18lingered everywhere in the apartment I grabbed a slice of pizza and forced myself to eat then
33:23started packing up everything that belonged to me there wasn't much really after I got into college
33:27at 18 I was afraid my parents would treat Brian badly so I took him with me at my poorest
33:33I could
33:33only afford a run-down studio apartment he slept on the bed and I took the couch Brian was well
33:39over
33:39six feet tall and he would bump his head every time he walked through the low doorway so I worked
33:43non-stop picking up every part-time job I could find until I finally saved enough for a down payment
33:48on a small two-bedroom townhouse love has a way of making you feel like you owe everything so I
33:53bought Brian more things than he could ever need I never once considered that he didn't want any of it
33:57this time I decided to give him what he actually wanted freedom after I finished packing I walked out
34:02of the home Brian and I had shared the next morning when the staff at the bureau of non-human
34:06affairs
34:07asked me for the third time if I was sure I wanted to terminate my bond with Brian I still
34:11nodded when
34:12a human dissolves a bond unilaterally financial compensation is required I left the townhouse
34:16to him at the office Emily handed me the bond termination certificate then hesitated before
34:21asking Miss Emma would you like to give this to Mr. Brian in person or should we mail it on
34:25your behalf
34:26I took out the letter I had rewritten over and over again the night before please mail it to him
34:30I said and include this there were only two sentences in the letter I am sorry Brian I took you
34:35away without your consent so this time I am giving your freedom back to you I walked out of city
34:40hall
34:41got into my car and left Los Angeles behind my new life would begin in Florida somewhere by the ocean
34:46waiting for warmer days ahead since my new job was as a lecturer at a university in Miami I rented
34:51a small
34:52beach house with a yard the evening sea breeze carried a faint salty smell as I walked along the
34:56shore wearing a mask the orange glow of the sunset was just right soft and beautiful I took a photo
35:01then out
35:01of habit open my iMessage chat with Brian scrolling up it was nothing but messages from me photos of
35:06little trinkets I found at vintage markets strange shaped clouds in the sky the slow growth of a
35:11sunflower he rarely replied most of the time all I ever got back was a short dismissive yeah the last
35:17message in our chat was from the day I heard the truth I had asked him where are you I
35:22can come pick
35:22you up he never replied by then he must have already received the bond termination certificate and still he
35:28could not even bring himself to say goodbye all that was left in my chest was a dull spreading ache
35:32after thinking it over I realized my new life should not be tied to the past so I changed my
35:37phone number
35:38deleted my old instagram and created a new account I packed my schedule as full as possible just to
35:43earn a few nights of uninterrupted sleep some of the more outgoing college girls like to chat with me
35:48between classes professor Emma why do you always wear a mask on campus because I'm not very pretty
35:53who said that oh my god I swear I will shut them up there is no such thing as an
35:58ugly girl
35:58she sounded completely sincere and the others around her nodded in agreement just as indignant
36:03I would laugh it off and smoothly change the subject soon enough they started talking about
36:07the bee skin they had at home then they asked me professor what kind of bee skin do you have
36:11I did
36:12not know how to explain everything that had happened with Brian so I gave them a simple answer he died
36:16they fell silent for a long moment until the bell rang and class began after that during my two weekly
36:22lectures students would often bring me little things a starbucks latte a blueberry muffin or a
36:26bar of hershey's chocolate I could never finish it all that was when I started thinking about the
36:31little fox bee skin on campus who survived by collecting recyclables bee skin were usually
36:35striking in appearance and fox bee skin were among the most beautiful of all but this one had deep
36:40criss-crossing scars covering both sides of his face he was afraid of scaring the students so he only
36:45came out late at night that evening when I left the lab and went looking for him it started pouring
36:50out of
36:50nowhere a figure darted toward me a fluffy foxtail swaying behind him I called out softly hey little
36:56fox huh the young beast can turned around and noticed me immediately lowering his head he quickly
37:01covered his face with his hands I'm sorry ma'am I must have misheard please don't mind me the autumn
37:06rain carried a sharp chill he was soaked through water dripping steadily from his clothes I looked at
37:11him and said gently you don't have to hide your face I've seen you around I have hot water and
37:16a
37:16dryer in my office come upstairs and get warmed up he hesitated then slowly lowered his hands and
37:21nodded thank you ma'am once we got into my office under the bright lights I realized how young he
37:26was
37:26around 18 or 19 about the same age as my freshman while he was showering I went next door to
37:31the lab
37:32to ask about him my colleague Arthur was always eager to talk and he filled me in without hesitation
37:37that little fox is named Finn I heard he used to be incredibly good looking his former handler tried
37:42to sell him to the red light district in the underground beast trade he refused and even bit
37:47someone before escaping during the escape his face got slashed up when the people from the black market
37:51saw he was disfigured they beat him badly and threw him into the ocean lucky for him the university
37:57rowing team pulled him out since then he's been scraping by on campus selecting recyclables I asked where
38:02does he live there's a rundown shed behind the hill on campus Arthur frowned slightly Emma I heard your
38:08bee skin passed away you're not thinking about adopting him are you I bit down on the straw of
38:12my hot latte and didn't answer Arto's voice suddenly sharpened he looks like that who would want to adopt
38:17him his words overlapped with the voices from my past she looks so plain who would ever like her but
38:22why we have hearts too we want to love and be loved just the same I looked at Arthur and
38:26said quietly
38:27he isn't ugly he's just been hurt and he's kind he's sweet I've seen him share the food
38:32he collects with homeless people nearby I've seen him donate his spare change to the beastkin
38:36protection agency so please don't say things like that about him again when I stepped out of
38:41Arthur's office I saw Finn standing in the hallway his blonde hair and tail were still damp his eyes
38:46were brimming with tears feeling a little awkward I changed the subject if it's hard to do it yourself
38:50I can help dry it I took the towel and gently dried his hair and tail then used a hair
38:54dryer to finish
38:55the job it was my first time drying a bee skin's tail and I was clumsy I accidentally heard him
39:00more
39:00than once and kept apologizing Finn's face turned red it's okay I'm already very grateful to you
39:06when I finally finished I handed him a muffin and the latte he didn't take them after a long pause
39:11as
39:11if gathering all his courage he spoke again ma'am I don't eat much could you adopt me my hand
39:17froze
39:17mid-air Finn continued I know I'm not good looking but I can cook wash dishes mow the lawn I
39:23can get
39:23massages and I know how to grow roses I smiled then took off my mask and met his eyes but
39:28I'm not good
39:28looking either would you still choose me Finn gently reached out and touched my cheek his movements
39:33careful almost reverent you're very cute he said softly I want to go with you my eyes stung I blinked
39:41quickly holding back the tears and took his hand as we walked out of the lab building together the
39:45rain had stopped and just like that I chose a family for myself I completed the paperwork and adopted Finn
39:51just like he promised he did everything beautifully he kept the beach house spotless filled the yard with
39:55blooming hydrangeas and brought me hot home-cooked lunches at the lab running those spectral analyses
40:00today nearly killed me Arthur said as he wandered in from next door shamelessly helping himself he
40:05took a big spoonful of beef stew and let out a low whistle damn Finn can cook this is incredible
40:11meanwhile the one at my place does nothing but curl up on the couch and watch Netflix honestly
40:15Arthur should have been grateful Brianne could not cook at all then again maybe he just never bothered to
40:21do anything like that for me that night I had the nightmare again a memory buried deep in my mind
40:27I was 17 Isabella and Logan went with me and Brian to Universal Studios Orlando halfway through the day
40:33the park was hit by a sudden indiscriminate attack explosions erupted from every direction Logan shielded
40:39Isabella while I grabbed Brianne's hand and ran for the exit we were near the eastern side of the park
40:44but the flying debris still cut into everyone we were only steps away from the exit when it was blown
40:50apart
40:51right in front of us at the time I had been running ahead and never noticed what happened in that
40:55instant
40:56but in the dream I saw it clearly both Logan and Brian threw themselves toward Isabella without hesitation
41:01I was left alone collapsing into rubble and dust with no one caring whether I lived or died
41:07Logan and Brian were only relieved that Isabella was safe later I lay unconscious in the ICU for days
41:12my parents and Brianne stayed by Isabella's side comforting her as she cried from the shock
41:17a voice echoed in my mind mocking me Emma see no one in this world loves you
41:22it came from everywhere repeating itself over and over surrounding me until I could not escape it
41:28in the dream my soul seemed to float above crouched down clutching my head as I tried to argue back
41:33that's not true that's not true then faintly someone grabbed my hand and pulled me forward
41:40a voice said Emma that's not true everyone deserves to be loved I woke with a start the first thing
41:46I
41:46saw was Finn sitting at my bedside wiping the cold sweat from my forehead his face tight with worry when
41:52he saw my eyes open he finally let out a breath tears slipped down my face before I could stop
41:57them
41:57Finn can you hold me he climbed onto the bed and pull me into his arms I clung to him
42:02like a child pouring
42:03out everything I had been holding inside Finn gently patted my back murmuring soft reassurances I did not have to
42:09worry about him snapping at me to leave him alone I did not have to worry about him brushing me
42:13off
42:13and disappearing into distractions and I definitely did not have to worry about him looking at me with
42:17cold indifference I want to hear a song I whispered Finn hummed softly you are my sunshine my only sunshine
42:24you make me happy when skies are gray with Finn taking care of me I started getting better little by
42:30little the sunlight was especially bright today Finn and I were in the backyard hanging sheets out to dry we
42:36ended up laughing and playing around on either side of the fabric the breeze lifting it between
42:40us then someone called my name from beyond the fence Emma I turned around Brian was standing there
42:45the hanger slipped from my hand and fell straight onto the grass Finn noticed the shift in my expression
42:50immediately and stepped in front of me without hesitation I tugged lightly on the hem of Finn's
42:55flannel shirt it's okay I know him go take care of the blue crabs in the kitchen I just need
43:00a minute
43:00to talk to him we walked over to a wooden bench by the shore the ocean breeze tangled my hair
43:05I forced
43:06a small awkward smile it's been a while Brian he stared at me his voice cold who is that fox
43:11my new
43:12fostered bee skin
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