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  • 7 hours ago
Head Witch in Charge
Transcript
00:00:25Jesus, Mom, can you at least warn me when you're going to do that?
00:00:30please oh please don't be such a child do you still have the wand of light
00:00:45see the all-powerful magic heirloom still safe and sound no you should be more careful
00:00:51the wand of light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires yeah and if it falls into
00:00:58the wrong hands it would become the most dangerous weapon in the world but a marriage to another
00:01:05noble witch family would only strengthen your power yeah less than evil Svensson right
00:01:12the Svensons are our worst enemies Leona do you know how much our family has suffered over the
00:01:18centuries because of them I know sorry you are the guardian of the wand of light Leona and you
00:01:27can't reach your full potential until you marry and succeed me as head of the family come home
00:01:34with a husband next week or I will pick one for you what mom no please don't Leona Sherwood you
00:01:41are
00:01:42getting married whether you like the boy I pick or not mom understand
00:01:49don't worry mom I'm the responsible daughter remember
00:02:01okay Leona Sherwood this is your last weekend of freedom
00:02:09for two more nights
00:02:10you guys fuck my responsibility I'm gonna have some fun
00:02:27thank you that would be 25 dollars
00:02:31I think you mean it's on the house right right it's on the house
00:02:57there you are little Miss Sherwood
00:03:06where the hell are you I'm in Vegas like I said it would be old man
00:03:09hey don't you get smart with me you little
00:03:11shit remember your mission seduce the Sherwood heir and marry her and then that whole obnoxious
00:03:18family will be there to pay off our debts you mean your debts
00:03:22quiet it's bad enough that I have a sorry excuse for an heir you are an embarrassment to the
00:03:28Spence in name now if you don't marry the Sherwood girl like I told you I am going to sell
00:03:34your
00:03:35little sister off to old Fitzgerald to be his fourth wife
00:03:39dad secret is just a kid when I want your opinion I will ask for it until then you shut
00:03:45up and do
00:03:46as I say do you understand yeah I understand good and you keep practicing you sound god-awful
00:03:57it's the heartless fucking bastard
00:04:13it's two of us
00:04:15you're saying you don't remember me
00:04:17who remembers shipping in his dumb teens anyways
00:04:20no way
00:04:21totally
00:04:22I love that show
00:04:23I watched it in one sitting at like 2am
00:04:26this is one of my favorites
00:04:27it definitely doesn't get the love that it deserves
00:04:29but I think it's one of the best ones
00:04:31really
00:04:33I never begged you for a sappy romance kind of guy
00:04:38looks can be deceiving
00:04:44the wand of light
00:04:46so it does exist
00:04:48maybe I'm just jaded
00:04:50it's hard to believe that love like that actually exists in real life
00:04:53why not we're witches monsters and magic exist in our world
00:04:58why can't true love
00:05:01I am lily by the way
00:05:04lily collins
00:05:08eric phillips
00:05:09nice to meet you lily collins
00:05:12damn he's hot
00:05:13and I'm in vegas
00:05:15I deserve a little fun
00:05:16well eric phillips
00:05:19I'll be in the poker room tonight
00:05:21maybe I'll see you there
00:05:22maybe
00:05:26I'll be in the poker room tonight
00:05:42okay Svinson
00:05:44don't fuck this up
00:05:45don't fuck this up
00:05:59Eric motherfucking Svinson
00:06:01excuse me
00:06:01you ghost me for three months after sleeping with me
00:06:04and you think you can sit there and act like nothing happened
00:06:07I think you've got me confused with someone else
00:06:09don't gaslight me Svinson
00:06:11I know exactly who you are
00:06:26you know who she is
00:06:28I think she's got me confused with someone else
00:06:35thank you
00:06:43you nervous
00:06:44not at all
00:06:47you can always fold you know
00:06:49I'd hate to send you home empty-handed
00:06:53not a chance
00:06:55I'm here to win
00:06:57you sure
00:06:58seems like your focus is somewhere else
00:07:01oh
00:07:02I am
00:07:04very focused
00:07:07are you guys done making good eyes at each other or what
00:07:12you're full of
00:07:13you're full of shit Phillips
00:07:13I call
00:07:15yeah there is no way that you have this
00:07:18but don't worry
00:07:20I'll let you go another round
00:07:22once I beat you
00:07:23actually
00:07:24I think I'm about to hit the jackpot
00:07:29Eric
00:07:50I've wanted to do that
00:07:51since I saw you by the pool in your bikini
00:07:53Eric
00:07:54everyone can see
00:07:56do you want me to stop
00:08:12let's see
00:08:13let him watch
00:08:16give him a show
00:08:28wait please don't stop
00:08:31use your words
00:08:33tell me what you want
00:08:34I want your tongue inside me
00:08:37please
00:08:38that's a good girl
00:08:41oh
00:08:45Eric
00:08:49wait
00:08:49wait
00:08:50wait
00:08:50I think I'm gonna
00:08:53was that some kind of vision
00:08:58no
00:08:59that was from him
00:09:08lucky son of a
00:09:10bitch
00:09:10beginner lux
00:09:12let's see you do it again next hand
00:09:14no can do
00:09:16I have a date with a
00:09:18very pretty lady
00:09:24why do I have the feeling that you're not exactly as you present
00:09:28Eric
00:09:29Phillips
00:09:31it is
00:09:31it is Vegas
00:09:33isn't that part of the fun
00:09:46what do I have the feeling that you're not going to do it again next time
00:09:47it wasn't very nice of you
00:09:49to tease me with your strap of your dress during our game
00:09:52hmm
00:09:53it's very distracting
00:09:57well you know it wasn't very nice of you
00:10:00to send me that little vision during our game
00:10:03I just wanted to give you a little sneak preview
00:10:13Eric there are people
00:10:15and if you're quiet
00:10:17they won't see you
00:10:21I should stop
00:10:22this wasn't how the plan was supposed to go
00:10:24you knew you were right before
00:10:26I'm not who I say I am
00:10:28and who out there is exactly as they present
00:10:32but I am
00:10:33look I don't care who you are outside of this
00:10:36for once in my life I
00:10:39I just want to forget about everything
00:10:42just live in the moment
00:10:44and I think you
00:10:47can help me do that
00:10:55remove the camouflage
00:10:57I want you to see you
00:10:59the real you
00:11:02but then you'll know who I am
00:11:04I already know who you are
00:11:07the real you
00:11:09wants to let go
00:11:15no one's ever looked at me like that
00:11:18he really wants me
00:11:20the real me
00:11:21fuck
00:11:23you are gorgeous
00:11:27i want you eric
00:11:30i need you
00:11:35spread your legs for me
00:11:41keep your eyes open
00:11:44i want you to watch yourself
00:11:46come
00:11:47come all over my fingers
00:11:53keep your eyes open
00:11:59i thought you said that they couldn't hear me
00:12:02they can if you stay quiet
00:12:04keep your eyes open
00:12:05or i'll stop
00:12:10that's a good girl
00:12:12that's a good girl
00:12:13went down in my head
00:12:18oh my god they hurt me
00:12:21i can't
00:12:23just relax
00:12:24i can't eric
00:12:41i can't wait to put my mouth on you
00:12:53i can't wait to put my mouth on you
00:12:57go
00:12:57fire
00:13:00one
00:13:01four
00:13:03two
00:13:07four
00:13:28I can't believe I just came on his hand in front of other people.
00:13:33I think this is your floor.
00:13:41I'll be at the fountain tomorrow at 8 o'clock.
00:13:45If you decide that you want more.
00:13:47See you there.
00:13:58How did he know what floor I was on?
00:14:05So you've told me all about your wild sister and the things that she's done.
00:14:11What about you?
00:14:15I'm the responsible sister.
00:14:17The boring one, if you will.
00:14:20And I do what I'm supposed to do.
00:14:22Follow the rules and all that good stuff.
00:14:25I don't believe you.
00:14:26I do. I mean, I know how you are in an elevator.
00:14:29Oh, come on.
00:14:32Come on.
00:14:34It's Vegas.
00:14:35Let me be your bad influence.
00:14:37Just for tonight.
00:14:41So, any bad ideas?
00:14:47Just one.
00:14:54What are you doing?
00:15:12No games.
00:15:13Just fuck me already.
00:15:15I thought I would try to woo you first.
00:15:16Consider me wooed.
00:15:18Then we could take it slow?
00:15:19Oh, your lips say one thing.
00:15:21But your body says something else.
00:15:35Wait.
00:15:37Shit.
00:15:39I almost lost my cool.
00:15:40I gotta remember the plan.
00:15:44Oh, my God.
00:15:45I can't believe I just did that.
00:15:47That was so embarrassing.
00:15:48This is why I don't do crazy shit.
00:15:50That was way too much.
00:15:51Hey.
00:15:52You're never too much.
00:15:54You don't understand, Eric.
00:15:56Okay, if my family saw me do any of that, they would freak out.
00:15:59Tonight's not about your family.
00:16:01Tonight's about you.
00:16:02Remember?
00:16:03Forget what everyone else has told you to do.
00:16:06Do something that you want to do.
00:16:08Something no one would expect.
00:16:10Maybe he's right.
00:16:12I've spent my whole life doing what my family's told me to do.
00:16:18For once in my life, I'm doing something for myself.
00:16:22She spotted the chapel.
00:16:25Just like I planned.
00:16:29So, are you, uh, you sure about this marriage thing?
00:16:32It's only temporary.
00:16:34Okay, and old magic is weak.
00:16:35The hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning.
00:16:39So, are you ready for a holy matrimony?
00:16:42I'm ready if you're ready.
00:16:45Come on.
00:16:49Let's go.
00:16:55You're nervous?
00:16:58Just, never been married before.
00:17:07Uh, it's my sister.
00:17:08I need to take this.
00:17:09Oh, yeah, take your time.
00:17:11Elvis here wants me to pick out a hand fast bouquet.
00:17:14Hey, mama, let's get some flowers for you.
00:17:15Come on.
00:17:15Let's do it.
00:17:17You need to come home, now.
00:17:19I can't, secret.
00:17:21Eric, Dad's up to something.
00:17:22He invited Fitzgerald to the house and made me dress up.
00:17:26He looks at me weird.
00:17:27It really freaks me out.
00:17:28You were my big brother, E.
00:17:30I need you here.
00:17:32Listen, I can't leave right now, but I promise when I come home, I'll have enough power to
00:17:36get rid of Dad forever, okay?
00:17:41Hey.
00:17:43Is everything okay?
00:17:45Yeah.
00:17:48Yeah, it's fine.
00:17:51You, uh, you sure about this?
00:17:54It's only temporary.
00:17:56Come on, we'll be laughing about this for years.
00:18:02Let's go.
00:18:18Right, only temporary.
00:18:20Unless you get hand fasted under a full moon, then the hand fast bond is nearly unbreakable.
00:18:26But she doesn't know that.
00:18:27And once she does, she'll hate me.
00:18:31Is your sister okay?
00:18:33Is something wrong?
00:18:36Nothing's wrong.
00:18:37We're about to get married in Vegas by Ovis.
00:18:40What could possibly be wrong?
00:18:43All right, you ready to rock and roll, you hunk-a-hunk-a-hot couple?
00:18:47Let's get this show started.
00:18:49Woo-hoo!
00:18:51Woo!
00:18:51Woo!
00:19:16This is it.
00:19:18I have the Wand of Light.
00:19:20The most powerful object in the world.
00:19:23If I leave now, I could use it to take control away from my father.
00:19:27Set Sigrid and I free.
00:19:35But I already betrayed her once.
00:20:06I'll see you next time.
00:20:19I'll have to get more chocolate strawberries.
00:20:21Be back soon.
00:20:32It's only temporary.
00:20:34Okay, and old magic is weak.
00:20:35The hand-fast bond will probably only last till the morning.
00:20:38Hmm.
00:20:39That's weird.
00:20:41The mark should have worn off by now.
00:20:51So, did you marry the girl yet?
00:20:56No, it's complicated.
00:21:00Complicated?
00:21:02Or distracted?
00:21:03You were sent there to marry the Sherwood heir and bind her power to this family, not to play house.
00:21:10You're a Svensson.
00:21:11Act like one.
00:21:12Eric is a Svensson?
00:21:16I married my family's worst enemy?
00:21:18I don't need you to tell me what I am.
00:21:21Then stop hesitating.
00:21:23If the rumors about the wand of light are true, we might catch an even bigger prize.
00:21:28So hurry up and marry the Sherwood girl and then bring her to me, idiot.
00:21:42He's been lying this whole time.
00:21:49I need to tell her the truth.
00:21:53You lying piece of troll shit!
00:21:56You didn't want me.
00:21:57You just wanted the fucking wand, didn't you?
00:22:01I didn't even know the wand existed until I met you.
00:22:03You still lied to me, Eric.
00:22:05You knew I was a Sherwood from the start.
00:22:07That's why you gave me a fake fucking name, right?
00:22:09Okay, I did, but that was before we did all...
00:22:11You lied before, before you decided to mess with me?
00:22:13Get your dick wet before you ruin me and my family forever?
00:22:17I'm not trying to ruin your family.
00:22:18I'm trying to save mine.
00:22:19Oh, I know all about you, Svensons.
00:22:22All you do is lie and cheat and steal to get whatever you fucking want.
00:22:27I should have caught it at the poker table, but your little tricks won't work on me this time.
00:22:32The hand fast, Mark, it'll fade.
00:22:35Just like you, just like whatever this was.
00:22:38The hand fast wasn't a trick.
00:22:39Not that part.
00:22:41Not with you.
00:22:42It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:22:45You will never, ever get the wand!
00:22:49Lily, what?
00:22:51When this fades, Eric, I will never have to see you again!
00:23:08So, that didn't happen.
00:23:12My older sister Effie told me that the mark would fade a week later.
00:23:17Then a month went by, then, well...
00:23:25See, this is where you don't fuck with old magic.
00:23:27It's all fun and games, so there's a full moon.
00:23:30Then it's the most powerful magic in the universe.
00:23:37Apparently, getting a hand fast married under a full moon creates a bond that's almost unbreakable.
00:23:44Also, apparently, the almost part means that both people have to perform the divorce fall.
00:23:52I tried calling, texting, sending flying monkeys.
00:23:57There's nothing but a single word from my beloved husband for half a year.
00:24:12Yes, I still sleep with a wand under my pillow.
00:24:16The emotional ass-whooping I got from my mother for getting hand fasted to a stranger was bad enough.
00:24:21No one can ever find out that I almost lost the wand, too.
00:24:26I just need one night to sleep without thinking about him.
00:24:54Who are you?
00:24:55What do you want with the wand of light?
00:24:58Nothing. I'm just here to collect my payday from my client once I bring him that wand.
00:25:04Payday? Someone sent you! Who?
00:25:08I'm afraid I can't break client confidentiality.
00:25:10Sorry, sweetie.
00:25:13Well, I'm afraid that you chose the wrong witch to fuck with tonight.
00:25:23No!
00:25:25No!
00:25:29Be wise not to fight back, witch.
00:25:31You're in over your head.
00:25:34I'd rather die than let you take the wand!
00:25:39Suit yourself.
00:25:44Suit yourself.
00:25:53What the fuck?
00:26:08Get off me!
00:26:09She has the wand!
00:26:11I got the wand.
00:26:12I'll get the rest later.
00:26:16No!
00:26:20You are the reason I lost the wand.
00:26:22What? Who are you?
00:26:29The hand fast mark.
00:26:34Hello, wife.
00:26:35Miss me?
00:26:39What are you doing here?
00:26:41Well, you know, I thought I'd spice up our marriage, do a little role-playing, but it looks
00:26:45like you're more into bondage.
00:26:47I didn't know you were so kinky.
00:26:48Shut up!
00:26:52You should be thanking me.
00:26:54I did just save your house.
00:26:55Thanking you?
00:26:56You're the reason my family's most powerful heirloom is gone.
00:26:59How did you even find me?
00:27:02Wait a minute.
00:27:04You were trying to steal the wand, too, weren't you?
00:27:07Maybe.
00:27:09God, you slimy, tote-faced motherfucker!
00:27:13Okay, first you tricked me into marrying you, then you ghost me for six months, and now you
00:27:18come in here like a goddamn fucking cartoon burglar and try to take my wand!
00:27:23Look, I was just gonna borrow it!
00:27:25Yeah, for one of your dirty, no-good-spensing schemes?
00:27:29I just...
00:27:29I need it, okay?
00:27:31It's...
00:27:33It's the only way that we can be free.
00:27:35Look, my dad doesn't know about our marriage.
00:27:38Not yet.
00:27:39But he knows about the wand.
00:27:40If he gets a hold of it, he's gonna sell it to the highest bidder.
00:27:43Whoever controls the wand has the power to take over the world.
00:27:46Or worse.
00:27:47No!
00:27:48Worse than tricking me into marrying you?
00:27:50I told you that that wasn't a trick.
00:27:52It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:27:54She has the wand, that shadow thief or whatever.
00:27:58And that's your fault!
00:27:59I can get it back.
00:28:02Look, I know I don't deserve it.
00:28:03But just give me one more chance.
00:28:06I can get the wand back, take care of what I need to take care of, and then I'll do
00:28:10the
00:28:10divorce spell.
00:28:11Please, Lily, just give me one more chance.
00:28:14Please.
00:28:15I can't trust him.
00:28:17I shouldn't.
00:28:20But my gut tells me, this time, it might be different.
00:28:29No.
00:28:31No, we're both gonna go get it.
00:28:34It is my job as a Sherwood heir to set things right, so I don't let the wand fall into
00:28:40the
00:28:40wrong hands.
00:28:41And you really think after Vegas, I would let you go alone to find the most powerful, magical
00:28:45object in the entire world?
00:28:47Uh, fair, uh, whatever you want, Lily.
00:28:52God, I hate when you call me that.
00:28:54All right, I'll call you wife.
00:28:57And you can call me whatever you want.
00:29:00Eric, husband, daddy.
00:29:02Shut up!
00:29:03Don't call me wife either.
00:29:05After we get this wand, we will do the divorce spell.
00:29:07Got it?
00:29:08You're breaking my heart.
00:29:09I mean, you're the better half of my soul.
00:29:13Yeah.
00:29:13You're not gonna sweet-talk your way into my pants again, Eric.
00:29:16We'll see.
00:29:22Now, the wand forbids a direct tracking spell, so we have to track its trail.
00:29:27That's a ten-mile radius.
00:29:29We'll never find a wand inside that circle.
00:29:31Well, with the tracking spell, I get a location, okay?
00:29:34It doesn't last long, though.
00:29:36We'll have like three or four days.
00:29:37Well, lucky for you, I already packed our bags.
00:29:42Consider it our official honeymoon.
00:29:48Aja, this, we're done.
00:29:49You got it?
00:29:50Don't go back on your words, Vincent.
00:29:52We will do the divorce spell.
00:29:54Cross my heart.
00:29:56Hope to die.
00:30:01Hope to die.
00:30:15You imagicked a car here?
00:30:17This isn't just any car.
00:30:25This is Bessie.
00:30:27You really expect us to track down the most powerful, magical object in the world?
00:30:32In a car without a roof?
00:30:34I mean, if you're not comfortable, I could go by myself, if you trust me not to run away.
00:30:45Hmm.
00:30:46I wouldn't trust you with a half-eaten newt muffin.
00:30:49I was going to throw in the trash.
00:30:53Then your chariot awaits, wife.
00:31:15We've been driving all day, and she hasn't said a single word.
00:31:30You're a Svensson.
00:31:32You don't play house with sheriffs.
00:31:33Why are we turning?
00:31:35We don't have any time.
00:31:36We have to find the wand, Eric.
00:31:39That circle is getting further and further away.
00:31:42Plus, it's getting dark.
00:31:43We need to stay somewhere for the night.
00:31:44Why don't you just let me drive?
00:31:45Because you haven't slept either.
00:31:47Plus, no one can drive Bessie but me.
00:31:51What is with guys and cars?
00:31:53Jesus.
00:31:53No.
00:31:54I mean literally, no one else can drive Bessie.
00:31:57My great-great-grandfather put a hex on all of our possessions.
00:32:00Anyone that's non-blood-related can't touch it.
00:32:03The Svensson's like to hoard their treasures.
00:32:06Your family has issues.
00:32:08Finally.
00:32:09Something we can agree on.
00:32:11Was this your plan all along?
00:32:13Make me feel bad for you because your family's evil,
00:32:15so I get all ooey-gooey and forget about the divorce?
00:32:18Not everyone in my family is evil.
00:32:21Yeah.
00:32:22Okay.
00:32:35You cross this wall or do anything to piss me off more than you already have,
00:32:40then you do not even want to imagine the hex I'm going to put on you.
00:32:48I promise, no funny business.
00:32:52Pinky promise.
00:33:13Good night to you, too.
00:33:28In Vegas, you said you had a sister, right?
00:33:34Yeah.
00:33:36Sigrid.
00:33:38She didn't ask to be a Svensson.
00:33:41She's different than us.
00:33:43Better.
00:33:45Not like you?
00:33:46No.
00:33:49Not like me.
00:33:50But you already know that.
00:34:07I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:08I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:08I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:09I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:09I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:10I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:11I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:11I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:12I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:12I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:12I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:13I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:17I'm not going to be a Svensson.
00:34:43Good morning, wife.
00:34:46I told you not to call me.
00:35:04You were saying something?
00:35:07What?
00:35:10How did you know I was awake?
00:35:13The husband always knows.
00:35:21Well, if you don't mind, I'm going to shower.
00:35:27No peeking.
00:35:32Cross my heart.
00:35:34Hope to die.
00:35:42I need to get a grip.
00:35:44Some washboard ads and a cocky grin aren't enough to make me fall for him.
00:35:49I just need this one time to take the edge off.
00:36:02I remember he touched me like this in Vegas.
00:36:18Look.
00:36:18I'm so close.
00:36:24Okay.
00:36:25That's it, Lily.
00:36:27Be a good girl.
00:36:29And come for me.
00:36:37Are you ready?
00:36:41Okay.
00:36:43Eric.
00:36:57You said that you wouldn't look.
00:37:01I don't need to look to know what you were doing.
00:37:04While thinking about me.
00:37:07God, you are so full of yourself.
00:37:09Do I know what I heard?
00:37:11Say another word, and I'll turn you into a frog.
00:37:16Were you thinking about that time in Vegas where I ate you out in the shower?
00:37:23And you came so hard, you almost crushed my skull between your thighs.
00:37:29I think about those times a lot.
00:37:32Yeah, well, I don't think about them at all.
00:37:34I don't think about them at all.
00:37:59You still haven't even told me what you won't belong for yet.
00:38:02It's on a need-to-know basis.
00:38:05Oh, don't you think I need to know?
00:38:08I am your wife, after all.
00:38:10Oh, now you remember you're my wife.
00:38:13Funny how you only remember that when it's convenient for you.
00:38:15I remember every time I think about how badly I fucked up in Vegas.
00:38:18So all I am is a mistake.
00:38:20If I remember right, you're the one that suggested that we get handfast married.
00:38:24Obviously that was before I knew about all your bullshit and lies.
00:38:29Duty and responsibility might not be a big deal in your family, but in mine, it's huge.
00:38:34See?
00:38:35There you go again.
00:38:36Always worried about what your family wants.
00:38:38It's never about what you want.
00:38:39I follow the rules because I have to, Eric.
00:38:42If I don't, I end up in situations like this.
00:38:45Did you ever stop to think that maybe that's unfair?
00:38:48That maybe your ideas and their ideas are bullshit?
00:38:52You ever think of that?
00:38:54Spoken like a true Spinson.
00:38:56Well, you're a Spinson too, sweetheart.
00:38:58Not much longer, I can tell you that.
00:39:19I want to get some coffee.
00:39:21It's getting dark.
00:39:21You really think you should be alone?
00:39:23So now that we're married, you think you have to babysit me too?
00:39:30Fine.
00:39:31Just don't take too long.
00:39:35You got her in the car or what?
00:39:38Who?
00:39:38Don't play done with me, boy.
00:39:40The little Sherwood witch you married and forgot to tell me about.
00:39:46You thought I wouldn't find out, huh?
00:39:48You did a good job of hiding it, I'll give you that.
00:39:51Maybe you are my son after all, huh?
00:39:54What's the end game here?
00:39:56You said you just needed to get the Sherwood's wand so you could pay off your debts.
00:39:59What does she have to do with it?
00:40:00Because I'm not an idiot like you.
00:40:03I'll finally have all the leverage I need over the Sherwood family.
00:40:07When I tell them their pretty little heir is my new daughter-in-law.
00:40:12And then it'll be our family that gets to call the shots in the magic world.
00:40:16So you just want to use her?
00:40:18Like you use mom?
00:40:19Like you're using your own daughter?
00:40:21This is not a request, boy.
00:40:24Bring the girl and the wand to me or you will be stripped of your name.
00:40:28Your magic, everything.
00:40:30And your sister, she'll be the one paying the price for your mistakes.
00:40:44This isn't right.
00:40:45The trail should still be here.
00:40:48Would you like some coffee, Miss Sherwood?
00:40:50Yeah, thank you.
00:40:52Wait, how did you know my...
00:40:54You.
00:40:58But the map said that...
00:41:00That's cute.
00:41:01You think that dusty old map could track me?
00:41:09That wand is mine.
00:41:14Not anymore, it's not.
00:41:15And sadly, my employers need your powers, too.
00:41:19Employer?
00:41:22Hold still.
00:41:23This will only hurt a bit.
00:41:25No, stop!
00:41:26Stop!
00:41:34Get away from her!
00:41:40Eric, the wand!
00:41:53My magic!
00:41:55She took half of my magic, Eric!
00:41:57You're okay.
00:41:58I got you.
00:42:00You're okay.
00:42:03I don't understand.
00:42:05The map said that the wand was miles away.
00:42:08What did she want with my powers?
00:42:10The thief must have found some way to bypass the tracking spell.
00:42:13She can't have gone far.
00:42:14We'll find her.
00:42:15Lay low for now.
00:42:16Eric, stop the car.
00:42:17I can't breathe.
00:42:18I can't breathe.
00:42:19Okay.
00:42:29Hey, hey, hey.
00:42:31Look at me.
00:42:31Look at me.
00:42:32You're okay.
00:42:32You're okay.
00:42:33Just breathe.
00:42:34I got you.
00:42:35You're safe.
00:42:37I thought she was gonna kill me, Eric.
00:42:41I'm not gonna let that happen.
00:42:43Not while I'm breathing.
00:42:47I'm not gonna let that happen.
00:42:57I still hate you.
00:43:00Huh?
00:43:01If you hated me, you wouldn't let me touch you like this.
00:43:05This doesn't change anything.
00:43:08It's only scratching an itch.
00:43:10Once we get the wand, and we do the divorce spell, and we forget each other existed.
00:43:21Is that what you want, Lily?
00:43:23You want to forget how good I make you feel?
00:43:26You want to forget I'm the only person in the whole fucking world who can make you feel this way?
00:43:36Eric.
00:43:39Wait, wait, wait.
00:43:40Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:43:47We can't do this.
00:43:50This is what goes wrong between us.
00:43:52We can't make that mistake again.
00:43:54We have a job to do, Eric.
00:43:56Let's get the wand.
00:43:58That's it.
00:43:59And then what?
00:44:01You know what happens after, Eric.
00:44:03We do the divorce spell, and we never see each other again.
00:44:29It's supposed to be the law.
00:44:39Smells like fresh baked pastries, cinnamon, old magic.
00:44:48I should have known.
00:44:51It's a satyr's inn.
00:44:53That's spelled.
00:44:55Noman-inhabitus' smell.
00:44:57It's woven into places like this for couples.
00:45:02Human orgies.
00:45:05Satyr's are the horniest bastards in the known world.
00:45:08It lowers any fear, doubt, shame, grits of your deepest desires.
00:45:16Without any fear of judgment or consequences.
00:45:28You don't.
00:45:31I'm trying not to.
00:45:50The spell doesn't create desire.
00:45:54It lets go of the lies.
00:45:57It tells us what we really want.
00:45:59What I want doesn't matter.
00:46:02It matters in here.
00:46:03I'm trying not to.
00:46:05Tell me what you really want.
00:46:07You can say goodbye.
00:46:09And go our separate ways.
00:46:11Or you can tell me you want this.
00:46:14You want me.
00:46:18Tell me to stay.
00:46:22Stay here.
00:46:24Please.
00:46:25God, what is this?
00:46:27Is this just the magic?
00:46:29No.
00:46:32It's not the spell.
00:46:34It's freedom.
00:46:37In here, the outside world doesn't matter.
00:46:40Just you.
00:46:41And me.
00:46:44I shouldn't want this.
00:46:46I shouldn't want this.
00:46:49I shouldn't be doing this.
00:46:53Or this.
00:46:55I'll be able to share with it.
00:46:58To the most respected family of the whole rich world.
00:47:01You definitely shouldn't sound this fucking sexy.
00:47:05To mine.
00:47:07You know the year.
00:47:09To the Sherwood family.
00:47:12Who are you?
00:47:14I want you, Eric.
00:47:16I need you.
00:47:20Tell me who you are.
00:47:24Lily.
00:47:25Close.
00:47:27But not close.
00:47:29But not close.
00:47:32Tonight.
00:47:33Tell me who you are.
00:47:36Your wife
00:47:59This doesn't change anything
00:48:03I know
00:48:05We can have tonight
00:48:06And then tomorrow we go back to who we are on the outside
00:48:10Sure
00:48:11I'll go back to being my bad self
00:48:13And you can go back to pretending to be a good little witch
00:48:17Excuse me
00:48:18Don't deny
00:48:19Lili Sherwood's Vincent
00:48:21I know what kind of dork
00:48:23Naughty thoughts you have
00:48:26I don't
00:48:28It's okay to be bad
00:48:31You don't have to pretend
00:48:35I don't, huh?
00:48:39You know just because I have half my magic
00:48:42Doesn't mean I can't play with you for tonight
00:48:44Yes
00:48:47And we go back in the morning
00:48:53Okay
00:48:56Now you're gonna sit there like a good little witch
00:49:02Witch.
00:49:06And I'm going to do whatever I want to you.
00:49:18I don't remember packing that lingerie.
00:49:21Close your eyes.
00:49:25Eric, you're so good for being such a bad boy.
00:49:32I'm being properly motivated not to move.
00:49:38See how long it takes you to break.
00:49:41For you, I could stay here forever.
00:49:43Pretty to think so.
00:49:45Why don't we test that little theory?
00:49:48We're playing a dangerous game.
00:49:51All you have to do is admit that I win.
00:49:57I'll let you fuck me.
00:49:59I'll even let you come wherever you want.
00:50:06You can come here.
00:50:09Or here.
00:50:12I'll even let you come in here.
00:50:18God.
00:50:19Come on.
00:50:21I know you wanna.
00:50:22Just admit that I'm right.
00:50:27Fine.
00:50:29You win.
00:50:30Oh, what was that?
00:50:32You hurt me.
00:50:34Oh.
00:50:43So what's my prize?
00:50:48I could torture you like you did me.
00:50:53But I want to be inside you.
00:50:55I want to feel you squeeze me tight.
00:50:59Then take me to bed, husband.
00:51:04Call me that again.
00:51:07You want me to fuck you, husband?
00:51:10Yeah.
00:51:11Fuck me.
00:51:12Oh.
00:51:14True.
00:51:15True.
00:51:20Tell me a story.
00:51:23Like the ones you did in Vegas.
00:51:27I've got a story about my pet goat, Gilmore, and how he got stuck on a magic carpet.
00:51:34Or the story about how my sister tried to negotiate with a troll using only red images.
00:51:40I don't know.
00:51:43I already know about your family.
00:51:47I want to know about you.
00:51:50What's it like to be a Svensson heir?
00:51:52You want the insider info.
00:51:55Mm.
00:51:55Mm.
00:51:56You tell me yours, I'll tell you mine.
00:51:58You're gonna tell me how wonderful it was growing up as a beloved and blessed Sherwood?
00:52:07Is that what you think being a Sherwood is like?
00:52:11Is that what you think being a Sherwood is like?
00:52:14All fun and rainbows?
00:52:16Yeah, everybody loves your family.
00:52:18That's not true, Eric.
00:52:19There are so many people who would love it if we just disappeared.
00:52:23My mother has been shouldering all that responsibility and pressure for decades.
00:52:28And next year, I will be the head witch in charge.
00:52:32Everyone's counting on me to do the right thing.
00:52:34Like eat your fruits and veggies?
00:52:35Like spending my whole childhood being told that the whole world depended on me.
00:52:41Like never bothering to have any hopes or dreams because my whole life was planned for me from the very
00:52:48start before I was even born.
00:52:50I'm always doing the right thing for the family.
00:52:52I was never allowed to even think of doing the wrong thing.
00:52:56I couldn't be tired.
00:52:58I couldn't be scared.
00:52:59I couldn't be angry.
00:53:00Every one mistake and my family loses everything that they've ever worked for.
00:53:05If this whole world fades to black, it's because I messed up.
00:53:08It's because I didn't do a good job.
00:53:13I don't think I've ever said that out loud before.
00:53:16I'm glad you did.
00:53:19Your turn.
00:53:21Growing up with Svinson was a little different.
00:53:26The old man likes to say I was the first of his disappointments.
00:53:31I guess it's good.
00:53:33At least I was first at something.
00:53:36I didn't care about disappointing him.
00:53:38I just wanted to get away from him.
00:53:41I had it all planned out when I turned 16.
00:53:44I'd leave, change my name, and the Svinson bloodline would die with me.
00:53:48My mom died when Secret was born.
00:53:53My dad used her against me every day since.
00:54:03I'm so sorry, Eric.
00:54:05I shouldn't have asked.
00:54:09It's okay.
00:54:11Svinsons have always lived in the Sherwood shadows.
00:54:14We are the shadows.
00:54:18All you do is shine.
00:54:30He always asks me what I want.
00:54:34What do you want, Eric?
00:54:39You'd hate me if I told you.
00:54:41I mean, more than you already do.
00:54:46I don't hate you.
00:54:49I never did.
00:55:24Eric, something's wrong.
00:55:27Dad's got visitors.
00:55:29A bunch of old guys.
00:55:30I don't know who they are.
00:55:31He made me play piano for them, like some kind of dress-up doll.
00:55:35It's like freaking me out.
00:55:41Eric.
00:55:43Are you safe?
00:55:48Eric.
00:55:49Are you safe?
00:55:50No.
00:55:52All those weird old men lived last night.
00:55:55And I hexed my door so no one could get in.
00:55:58Don't let anyone in.
00:55:59If Dad tries to get you to play with any of those weird old men, just...
00:56:02I know.
00:56:03I'll just do what he says.
00:56:06I always do.
00:56:08I'm so sick of this E.
00:56:10What if he actually does make me marry one of those guys?
00:56:12I'm never going to let that happen, all right?
00:56:15Look, I'm close to getting the Wand of Light.
00:56:19The Wand of Light?
00:56:21Like, the one from the fairy tales?
00:56:24You can't tell Dad a secret.
00:56:26When I get the wand, be ready for my call.
00:56:30I have a plan.
00:56:31I barely know basic spells.
00:56:35I don't know if...
00:56:36You can't.
00:56:37I know you can.
00:56:39When the time is right, you'll be ready.
00:56:48Call ended.
00:57:07Filling up Bessie.
00:57:09Meet me downstairs when you're ready.
00:57:20Oh, my God!
00:57:22Why do you and Mom always do that?
00:57:24A bit high-strung, aren't you, sis?
00:57:28I was just in the middle of thinking.
00:57:30Yeah, and going by your aura, I can guess about who.
00:57:33Very much giving post-orgasmic afterglow.
00:57:36Aw, yeah.
00:57:37Well, you and your little aura reading can go jump in a lake.
00:57:40Oh, aren't we feisty this morning?
00:57:43Your super-hot hubby isn't around, I'm guessing?
00:57:45Or have you already murdered him after catching his dick?
00:57:48I know all the best places tied a body, by the way.
00:57:52I'm fine, Effie.
00:57:54I know all about Eric Spenson.
00:57:56I'm not stupid.
00:57:57And when we get the wand back...
00:57:59You mean if you get the wand back?
00:58:01We will.
00:58:03And when we do, we'll do the divorce spell.
00:58:06This mark will be gone.
00:58:08I'll go home and marry the best person who serves our family alliance.
00:58:16It's not fair, you know.
00:58:18I know I'm the last person who should be saying that,
00:58:21because it's not like I can change it.
00:58:23But it's not.
00:58:26It's just the way it goes, right?
00:58:28There has to be a way for you to be with who you actually want, and be a good heir.
00:58:35Effie, what I want has nothing to do with anything in my life.
00:58:39That's fine.
00:58:40It's what it means to be a sure what.
00:58:43Just remember, repeating it doesn't make it true.
00:58:48All right.
00:58:50Whatever you say, sis.
00:58:51You know best.
00:58:54I know.
00:58:55Give everyone a hug from me.
00:58:57Tell them I'll be back home soon.
00:59:08Last night was the last time.
00:59:10After today, we're done.
00:59:13If I say that enough times,
00:59:15maybe I'll finally believe it.
00:59:26I'll tell you about my plan with the wand.
00:59:30My family's magic is dying.
00:59:32My father's been cashing in on broken promises for years.
00:59:35But he holds most of the power,
00:59:37and me and Sieg would just get to scratch.
00:59:39That's how he controls us.
00:59:42If I could use the wand just once,
00:59:44I could take his power away from the bridge.
00:59:47I'm not trying to ruin your family.
00:59:49I'm trying to save mine.
00:59:50It's the only way that we can be free.
00:59:54That's what you meant by trying to save your family.
00:59:58I was going to tell you the night before.
01:00:00I was going to tell you the truth.
01:00:01And then I was just going to ask if I could use the wand just once.
01:00:06And then I would do whatever you want.
01:00:08Get a divorce, leave you alone forever.
01:00:12Why didn't you tell me?
01:00:16Why didn't you tell me that morning?
01:00:18Maybe things could have been different.
01:00:21I would have asked you to stay.
01:00:23It's a nice idea,
01:00:26but our families have been at war since the beginning of time.
01:00:29And then maybe if we were different people,
01:00:33we have different lives,
01:00:36this would have worked.
01:00:37Maybe we can...
01:00:40Maybe the wand has a spell for that, Eric.
01:00:43A witch can hope.
01:00:51What?
01:00:53Do I have mushrooms growing out of the side of my head?
01:00:55Why are you looking at me like that?
01:01:10Wait, I'm driving.
01:01:11Pull over.
01:01:31You have got to be kidding me.
01:01:39End of the line, witches!
01:01:49No!
01:01:52No!
01:02:03Eric!
01:02:05Eric!
01:02:09No!
01:02:14You're not doing it!
01:02:17Oh, no!
01:02:28now's not a good time old man well it sounds like my insurance policy worked
01:02:34you you sent the shadow thief of course i sent her do you think i would trust you
01:02:40to finish the job demons are very expensive you know but i thought that the sherwood girl's soul
01:03:01in exchange for the wand was a good enough bargain souls of magic users apparently taste better
01:03:19you said you needed her alive the sherwoods will never pay off your debts if you kill their heir
01:03:23i've reconsidered once i have that wand i will be the most powerful witch alive
01:03:29debts won't matter the stupid sherwoods won't matter and as for the girl well i don't need her
01:03:36breathing to use her power i can always marry sigrid off to form new alliances
01:03:43guess you won't be trapped in a marriage after all son you're welcome
01:03:51go to hell home man
01:04:03take it
01:04:08your soul will be delicious
01:04:10i can take dad's magic and him finally be free
01:04:26get off my wife
01:04:35you'll pay for that witch
01:04:48this isn't the last you'll see of me
01:04:55hey i've got you
01:04:57you didn't run
01:04:59you're kidding i'd be a pretty shitty husband if i let my wife's soul get sucked out by a demon
01:05:07eric you can't get rid of me that easily
01:05:10no no no no stay with me
01:05:13eric oh my god
01:05:15eric no no no no stay with me
01:05:17oh my god
01:05:20i can't save you i don't have my powers
01:05:23why didn't you run you could have saved yourself
01:05:29i've been saving myself my whole life i thought i'd try something new
01:05:36i'm an idiot you stupid stupid idiot
01:05:39yeah
01:05:42but i'm your idiot
01:05:50you take a divorce spell
01:05:52i had a promise
01:05:54now you're free
01:05:56i don't want to be free
01:06:02i don't want to be free
01:06:05i want to be with you
01:06:07just keep secrets safe
01:06:09safe from my father
01:06:12safe from all of it
01:06:15you know those days in vegas
01:06:20were the best three days of my life
01:06:22all right let's get this show started okay
01:06:27i love you
01:06:28here
01:06:29i love you too
01:06:32i love you
01:06:33i love you
01:06:36eric
01:06:38no
01:06:41i love you
01:07:00the wand of light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires
01:07:05and
01:07:21please
01:07:23please
01:07:24please
01:07:24please
01:07:24please
01:07:24please
01:07:37You absolute moron.
01:07:42You absolute moron.
01:07:44Be gentle. I was dead for like 10 seconds.
01:07:49You're alive.
01:07:51That is for divorcing me on your literal deathbed, you asshole.
01:07:56I thought I was doing something noble, something cool.
01:07:59The wand gave you your power back?
01:08:03My mom used to say that the wand's user grants it its deepest desire.
01:08:07I guess it knew what I really wanted.
01:08:11What did you want?
01:08:13You.
01:08:17Don't scare me like that again, okay?
01:08:20You know, I thought I heard something, but I was bleeding out.
01:08:29Maybe you could say it again?
01:08:35Maybe you could say it again?
01:08:39I love you, Eric's Vincent.
01:08:43That's my girl.
01:08:50Let's go.
01:09:03You ready for one last stop?
01:09:07Yeah.
01:09:25Ah, there you are.
01:09:30I knew I could always trust a demon to get the job done.
01:09:34Now, where is my wand?
01:09:37Wait.
01:09:39You're supposed to be dead.
01:09:41Wow.
01:09:42You weren't kidding.
01:09:43He really is evil.
01:09:44I put a barrier around this whole house.
01:09:47It's impossible.
01:09:48There's no way you should be able to be in here.
01:09:50There's always a loophole.
01:09:51Hold me in.
01:09:55Secret, you ungrateful brat.
01:09:58How dare you betray me like this?
01:10:00Really, Dad?
01:10:01Playing the family card after you almost sold me into child marriage?
01:10:05You ungrateful little pests.
01:10:14You're powerless now, old man.
01:10:17Your magic's gone.
01:10:18Forever.
01:10:32Eric, Otis, Svensson, release me this instant.
01:10:36That is an order.
01:10:39You can handle it from here, right?
01:10:41His powers are gone.
01:10:42It doesn't scare me anymore.
01:10:46You ungrateful little brats.
01:10:48Both of you will pay for this.
01:10:49You will both pay for this.
01:10:55Yeah, yeah.
01:10:56Talk soon, pups.
01:10:58We're going to hit the road.
01:10:58I said get back here.
01:11:00I said get back here.
01:11:02Get back here.
01:11:03Please don't do this, you little bitch.
01:11:22So, where to now?
01:11:24Should we go and drop off the wand of life?
01:11:27Yeah.
01:11:29But there's something I want to do first.
01:11:32That sounds ominous.
01:11:34Just so happens that there's another full moon tonight.
01:11:39Leona Sherwood, are you asking me to hand fast marry you?
01:11:44Yeah.
01:11:47I think I am Eric Sponson.
01:11:50Well, we better hurry if we're going to take the wand of light home and make it back in time
01:11:54to the hunk-a-hunk-a wedding chapel of love.
01:11:57I wonder if they have the same Elvis.
01:11:59I sure hope so.
01:12:01But if we're going to get hand fast married again, no more secrets this time.
01:12:06So, is there anything you want to come clean about now, soon-to-be-again husband?
01:12:13There is one thing.
01:12:16You might want to buckle up.
01:12:18We're about to go super speed.
01:12:20Bessie could have been going super speed this entire time.
01:12:24You didn't tell me to make our trip last longer, didn't you?
01:12:27You know me so well, soon-to-be-again wife.
01:12:33Leona Sherwood.
01:12:35Will you marry me?
01:12:36And not because of some spell or because it's your duty.
01:12:41But because you want to.
01:12:46Yes, I will.
01:12:57Ready?
01:12:58Hell yeah.
01:13:06We'll see you next time.
01:13:08We'll see you next time.
01:13:10Bye.
01:13:10Bye.
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