00:00We're going on a spa weekend, bitches!
00:06Can I take you to dinner?
00:09How? July 19th?
00:10Three months from now.
00:12How is it even possible that my husband left me
00:15for an older woman?
00:16You're supposed to leave me for, like, Gigi Hadid.
00:18Not buying a garden.
00:20You can't just leave me like that.
00:22I needed lunch and I was scared.
00:24I'm so sorry.
00:26This is why we need a spa weekend.
00:28Massages, champagne, big comfy robes.
00:31The last time I had a massage was, like, my last mammogram.
00:35Girl, I worry about you sometimes.
00:37I just booked a room.
00:38What?
00:39We're going on a spa weekend, bitches!
00:41Yeah!
00:43Welcome and namaste.
00:45It's beautiful.
00:46It's amazing.
00:47I'm Shanti.
00:48She looks like a girl.
00:49Jesus.
00:51I never want to go home.
00:53I miss my kids.
00:54What?
00:54No, I don't miss my kids.
00:58Yeah!
00:58Is that Mel?
00:59Oh, oh, oh!
01:00What's up, you middle-aged slugs?
01:02Hey!
01:04On your right is one of the outdoor yoga classes.
01:07Gene, he is checking you out.
01:08Get over here.
01:09Yeah, you!
01:10Come on, Magic Mark.
01:11This is Jane.
01:12Nice to meet you, Jane.
01:13She's on the older side, but she's got a porno body.
01:16Stand up.
01:16Show your body.
01:17Show him your dick.
01:19I sense a great deal of stress in all of you.
01:22Oh, my God.
01:23My boss is calling me again.
01:25You guys need to stand up for yourself.
01:27Stop calling her!
01:31Bang, bang into the room!
01:34Hanging out with your friends is essential to our survival.
01:36The most important thing to do, guys.
01:38If you need anything, I'm here for you.
01:41This whole spa thing is such a scam.
01:44Namaste.
01:44You're supposed to walk out of here all centered and chill.
01:47Don't we look chill to you?
01:48Not really.
01:51Hey, you guys!
01:52Not doing anything weird or illegal.
01:53Wait a minute, Sarah!
01:55Sarah!
01:56You know, I'm at a tantric massage.
01:58I know what you're up to.
01:59This place hires good-looking Australian guys to flirt with all the moms.
02:03It's not gonna work on me, Crocodile Dundee.
02:06Oh!
02:08Whoa!
02:08How are you doing this?
02:10The human hand has-
02:11Don't talk.
02:12Let's go to the left.
02:14To the left.
02:15To the left.
02:16To the left.
02:18Welcome to goat yoga.
02:20Oh!
02:21So cute!
02:23Guys, I think I burned my foot up.
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