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Watch Maximum Pleasure Guaranteed () free Season 1 Episode 1 online in HD on Dailymotion (2026).
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00:11This is disgusting. This is disgusting.
00:18They finally arrived. I mean, check this out.
00:20The box is absolutely beautiful. I can't wait.
00:23I can't wait.
00:29Exactly. I'm going to kill him. I'm going to murder him.
00:34I'm going to murder that guy. I'm going to chop him up into tiny little pieces and then I'm going
00:38to glue those pieces back together, reanimate him, and chop him up again.
00:42No, you're not, Paula.
00:43Yeah, probably not. It's like a ton of work.
00:45Yeah, logistically speaking, it'd be like a lot of work, like bone glue and like those weird clamps.
00:53Who watches cable TV anyway? Can you please, like, stop and just, come on, have a beer with me.
00:59I've got too much to do. And I'll fall asleep. I'm old and broken.
01:04You are not old.
01:05Well, I am broken. How does this look? Trev.
01:11What?
01:12This?
01:12The goat is too small.
01:14Really?
01:15It's a small goat, yeah.
01:16Okay.
01:18Small goat.
01:20I need to get this place set up or else Carl's not going to let Hazel sleep here.
01:25That's crazy.
01:27My ex's lawyer is, like, super aggressive and mine got his job because he's good at softball.
01:32Relax, yeah?
01:34You're doing great.
01:35Well, that is untrue.
01:37No, it is true.
01:39You just have to push through this beginning. Beginnings are always the hardest part, right?
01:43No. Endings are the hardest part. Beginnings are, you know, full promise.
01:49Like, maybe, I don't know, just this one time, instead of getting fisted by the giant club of tear in
01:56the sky,
01:57I'll, like, find love or happiness, maybe even just a $20 bill on the ground, right?
02:03But then, if this is the good, happy part of my life, I might as well just cut it short
02:09and take a bath with a toaster.
02:11No.
02:12If I could even find it.
02:14No, no toasters.
02:16It's possible I'm being dramatic.
02:19I think so, yeah.
02:22Thank you for listening.
02:23Of course.
02:30Oh, shit.
02:31I hate to do this, but we've only got, like, six minutes left.
02:35Already?
02:35Yeah.
02:36Unless, uh, you want another hour?
02:39Can we make six minutes work?
02:41Paula.
02:42Come on, six minutes? Six minutes is like a... a lifetime.
02:46Do you know how fast I can get you off?
02:53Poor guy is suffocating down there.
02:55Better.
02:55Better let him breathe.
03:04I'm gonna make you feel so good, Paula.
03:07Cause you deserve it.
03:09Mmm.
03:11Hey, come on, take your clothes off.
03:13I wanna see your body.
03:16Tick-tock.
03:17Tick-tock.
03:19Tick-tock.
03:21Tick-tock.
03:21Tick-tock.
03:22Tick-tock.
03:24Tick-tock.
03:24Tick-tock.
03:24Oh, my God, you're so hot.
03:26Oh, you're so hot.
03:27Oh, I know.
03:28You're young and strong and smooth like a dolphin.
03:31It's not even close.
03:33Wow, you look fucking gorgeous.
03:37Are you ready for this?
03:39Yes.
03:40Oh, fuck.
03:44Peter.
03:45Me.
03:46Me.
03:49Go!
03:50Aaaaa.
04:30I ain't freaking, I ain't faking this
04:32I ain't freaking, I ain't faking this
04:34I ain't freaking, I ain't faking this
04:36Shut up and let me go, hey!
04:50There's my baby
04:51Hi mama
04:52Hi Hazel
04:53I really want to sleep over your new apartment
04:55But dad says I can't yet
04:56Oh you totally can, no, tomorrow night
04:59It's gonna be so much fun
05:01We need to do the banana dance
05:03We need to do the banana dance
05:05Oh my god, I was born to banana dance
05:07You know I can do all the tropical fruits
05:09I can mango, I can pineapple
05:14Oh, I gotta go
05:17Bye moms, love you
05:18Can I pretty please get any fact checks on that story, like, now?
05:21Oh, well, I mean, it's 3,000 words and I just, just, just got it
05:25Yes, but somebody is always late on a deadline
05:28Excuse me?
05:28JK, true, JK
05:30He is on to a major story though, so we have to move
05:32People want to read about the senator's improprieties
05:34They don't care about precise deeds
05:36Okay, yeah, totally get it
05:38But just in terms of fact checking, there's some problematic deeds
05:41What?
05:42Well, like, she says she took the A train to get to his office
05:45The A train doesn't even go there
05:47She took A train, it's truth E, help us, Paula
05:49She took a train
05:50Look, Paula, I know you have the highest standards
05:53But it's no good if we finish second
05:54You've asked for a bigger role here, yes?
05:56Yes
05:56We all agree this department needs a leader
05:59And I'm totally ready for that
06:01Yeah, management is looking at outside candidates
06:03I have been pushing for you
06:05Okay, thank you, thank you
06:07Don't thank me, just show everyone you are who I hope you are
06:10We need this article by end of day, do you feel me?
06:13You are felt
06:22Hey, P, you are felt?
06:27What a deeply weird thing to say
06:29Yeah, were you trying to be sarcastic or, like, kiss her ass?
06:32Neither of them worked, by the way
06:34No, because if you want to kiss her ass, you would hide your anger better
06:37Yeah, like, we really hope you become our boss
06:40No, we're like, we really hope that you become our boss
06:43And then if you would be sarcastic, you would, like, change your inflection a bit more
06:46We really hope you would become our boss
06:48You have to change the inflection
06:50Could you please go back to work?
06:53Come on, Paula, we're just JK-ing
06:56Paula, we're just JK-ing
06:57It's Susie, it's a Susie impression because of her accent
07:00Yeah, because of the British accent
07:00Up yours, Rudy
07:01Okay, putting it up there
07:04Love ya
07:23Guys, I want to move my gator
07:26But we need more cha-ching in those chats, you know
07:29We want to see our tips, we need to see your tips
07:32Beautifully put, Skye
07:34We want fancy sushi for lunch
07:36Yeah, yeah, yeah
07:37Imitation crab, we want crab crab
07:41Guys, remember, I do private video chats as well
07:45So, you know, you turn your camera on, too
07:51Just put the request in down there
08:18Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
08:27I'm playing with you.
08:30Meet me today.
08:31Deposit and screening required.
08:33Hot and ready for you.
08:35One little deposit.
08:44Hi.
08:47Hey, good looking.
08:48How you doing?
08:50Yeah, good.
08:51I thought we were having dinner together.
09:00My mom is the exact opposite.
09:02Like, super traditional.
09:05You know, she's like a big fan of Barley Bush.
09:09You know, we had like a farm with animals and everything.
09:12Really?
09:13Yeah.
09:14You were looking at the Blue Ribbon winner for my pig at the county fair.
09:19No, you're fucking with me.
09:21Come on, it's true.
09:22Wait, is this like a fantasy for one of your other clients?
09:25Like, they like to watch you milk a cow real slow?
09:28No, I'm serious.
09:29It's true.
09:30It's, um, I have a picture somewhere.
09:33Honestly, I just didn't think I'd be here, you know?
09:37Like, I'm supposed to have it all figured out.
09:42And I'm a mess.
09:43I have you and a third grader to talk to.
09:47Like, I'm barely treading water.
09:50That's good company.
09:52Also, you're saying treading water, like, like it's a bad thing.
09:55But, I mean, treading water is what you do to keep from drowning.
09:59I did get a certificate in Girl Scouts for treading water.
10:03He was so smart and funny and sexy as hell.
10:12Oh.
10:13Uh, coming!
10:16Uh, hold on one second, okay?
10:17Wait, who's somebody?
10:18I don't know.
10:19It's dark.
10:20Okay.
10:24Help me!
10:31Go, go, go away, go!
10:35Get out of here!
10:36Get the fuck out of here!
10:37Get the fuck out!
10:39My God!
10:40Oh, my God!
10:41Oh, my God!
10:42Help me!
10:43Trevor!
10:44Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay!
10:46Hey!
10:47Leave him!
10:49Leave him alone!
10:51Leave him alone!
10:52Leave him alone!
10:54What?
10:55Uh, uh, I'm filming!
10:57I'm filming!
10:58Stop it!
11:00Leave him alone!
11:01What do you want?
11:02What do you want?
11:03Oh, my God!
11:04Leave him alone!
11:04Oh, no!
11:05Oh!
11:07Oh!
11:08I'm filming you, motherfucker!
11:12Go, CT.
11:18Fuck!
11:18Paula!
11:19Paula, call someone!
11:20Paula, help!
11:21Oh, my God!
11:22Leave him alone!
11:23Stop it!
11:24Go, CT.
11:29And just to clarify, this was all during an internet sex thing, ma'am.
11:35Uh, what does that have to do with anything?
11:38Respectfully, I'm only asking because I think it may be fake.
11:40What do you mean it's fake?
11:43Fake, like, not real.
11:47But I don't want to diminish your experience.
11:50Um, let's play it out.
11:52Say it happened.
11:52Sure, why not for a goof.
11:54Do you know where he lives?
11:55No.
11:59Okay, so he could be in Romania, for all we know.
12:03No, he's in America.
12:05Uh, East Coast time, because we would make plans and just say one, not like one East Coast time.
12:12And, uh, uh, and North East, because we have the same weather, I feel like he's local.
12:20Okay, sure.
12:23Still, if he was assaulted, um, we wouldn't know where exactly to send police officers.
12:30And, uh, another possibility is that, as I said earlier, this could be fake.
12:36A scam.
12:37Scam.
12:39You said you had your camera on.
12:41You could see you?
12:41Yep.
12:43Okay, so he could have recorded you.
12:48Are you married?
12:51I'm divorced.
12:53Me too.
12:55Love isn't about getting yelled at all weekend.
12:57And assuming he did record you, he could blackmail you.
13:02No, he wouldn't do that.
13:03Okay, um, ma'am, maybe...
13:07Maybe you didn't know him.
13:10Maybe it was all an act.
13:11I mean, you pay a fee, you get some tenderness.
13:15Just because he does this kind of work doesn't mean he's a bad person.
13:18Of course not.
13:21But still, this isn't the first time we've seen this kind of scam.
13:25And if it's that, tonight, maybe tomorrow, you're gonna get a call.
13:30Does he have your number?
13:31Yeah.
13:32May want to change that.
13:33Anyway, he's gonna tell you a sob story.
13:36Like he's in debt to some bad dudes or something like that.
13:39And if he could get 10, maybe 20 grand, he can be free.
13:42If he calls hang up, don't engage.
13:45These people are very good.
13:47They know how to pick their marks.
13:48Well, either you're wrong or I'm a fucking idiot.
13:52No, no, you're a human being.
13:55A lot of garbage out there trying to make money off that.
13:59Good people, they're like magnets.
14:05And sometimes they attract troublesome things.
14:14Help!
14:15Help!
14:16Help!
14:17Help!
14:18I saw someone here.
14:20Fuck!
14:21Oh, fuck!
14:21Fuck!
14:24Fuck!
14:24Fuck!
14:27Oh, Jesus.
14:31Sorry.
14:35Hello!
14:36Hey, Paula, how are ya?
14:37Yeah, uh, you're my lawyer. You tell me.
14:41Ah, you've been better.
14:42Looks like Carl's team now wants to see Hazel's bedroom.
14:46Really?
14:47Nah, it'll be fine. Nothing's gonna be easy with these guys.
14:50It all boils down to Carl wants to move, you don't want him to.
14:52Well, I'm seeing Hazel this afternoon, so I can get the whole story.
14:55No, you won't. Avoid conflict.
14:58Let me handle it.
14:59Hazel's friends are here, her school's here.
15:02What's going on with the promotion?
15:03They haven't said anything official, but it seems good.
15:07Okay, stable job, newly promoted.
15:09Role model for Hazel, I wish you were my mom.
15:11Uh, anything else going on?
15:13Nope.
15:16Coming!
15:17Hey.
15:18Hi.
15:18Hazel will be right down, she's just watching Human Centipede.
15:22Or is it Minions?
15:23Minions is the one where they're sewn together, right?
15:25Uh, I think that's despicable me.
15:28Want to come in?
15:29Mmm.
15:30It'll be just a minute.
15:31Okay.
15:31You can stay out here if you want.
15:32I don't care, it's up to you.
15:34It's hot.
15:34Yeah.
15:35She tell you she wants to try ice hockey, co-ed?
15:38I said, no, that's not gonna happen.
15:40Oh, good, good.
15:41We're practices at 5am.
15:43Five?
15:44Yeah.
15:44Who does that?
15:45Oh, I don't know, like way better parents than us.
15:48That's why art class is great, because we get to sleep in and she doesn't have her teeth knocked down.
15:54Yeah, art is better than hockey.
15:56That's right.
15:58Mmm.
15:59Hmm.
16:00A little early, huh?
16:01Oh, we're celebrating.
16:02Mallory just signed a new client, so it's good news.
16:04Yeah, but that's also really lovely of you to comment on my behavior.
16:07I'm not commenting.
16:09There's no comment.
16:12Hazel, let's go, bud.
16:14In a minute, boys!
16:17Fucking Christ.
16:19Carl, does it have to be Boise?
16:22I'm not moving to Idaho.
16:23You might like it.
16:24Oh, yeah.
16:25I'll grow the county's biggest potato and I'll become mayor by accident.
16:29Come on!
16:31I'd vote for you, I like a big potato.
16:34You're making it ugly and it doesn't have to be.
16:38Like, can you just think about it, please?
16:41For one second.
16:42Let's not do this right now like this, please.
16:45Think about her.
16:46For one second.
16:48How's the house?
16:50You know it's an apartment.
16:52And it's fucking dreamy.
16:54Great.
16:54Yeah, it's...
16:57Hey, look, I'm not saying this to start a fight, but I know how bad you want to see Hazel
17:01over the holiday.
17:02It's just impossible and it's not gonna work.
17:04You can't do me one favor?
17:06I can't do you this favor.
17:11I'm gonna, uh, wait in the car until her movie's done, okay?
17:15Okay, she'll be right back.
17:16Just send her out when she's done.
17:17You got it.
17:19Squeeze that lemon and make that juice.
17:22Drink it up, you got no excuse.
17:24Now stop.
17:25Hands up high.
17:26Move your body now, don't be shy.
17:29Oh, wow.
17:30I'll make them go bananas.
17:32I'll make them go bananas.
17:34I'll make them go bananas.
17:36I'll make them go bananas.
17:38Yeah!
17:40We did it!
17:41That one was really good.
17:43Can I post it?
17:44I don't know.
17:45Are you ready to be super famous?
17:47I only have three followers, Mom.
17:49You, Dad, and Mel.
17:51Okay.
17:51I've got takeout pizza, but I could also make you a pasta with bolognese.
17:57Pizza!
17:58Pizza!
17:59Okay, but I am getting way better.
18:03I promise you.
18:04Okay.
18:05Okay.
18:06Less...
18:07Less watching and more making pizza into energy.
18:11Come on!
18:12Do it!
18:12No!
18:16Mom?
18:17Yeah?
18:18Do you like that drop thing?
18:19Oh, I won't know for a bit, but thank you for asking, dumpling.
18:24I think you're going to get it.
18:25No.
18:26Yeah?
18:26I know you're going to get it.
18:28Thank you so much.
18:33Hello!
18:34Paula.
18:35Paula.
18:36Paula.
18:36Paula, it's me.
18:37It's Trevor.
18:42Paula?
18:43Just a sec, Hazelman.
18:45Yeah, I need help.
18:46I need help because they kidnapped me.
18:48My mom gave me all the money and...
18:51She said it wasn't.
18:52It's not enough.
18:55Not enough?
18:56No.
18:57Bummer.
18:58They're going to kill me.
19:03Please.
19:03Please.
19:04Paula.
19:05Paula.
19:07I'm sorry.
19:09I'm sorry, please.
19:11Please, Paula, help me.
19:13I'm so scared.
19:14I'm so scared.
19:17I'm so scared.
19:17No, Paula, Paula, please wire 50,000 or they're going to kill me.
19:22Hey.
19:35Trevor, just don't.
19:36Just stop, okay?
19:37Listen up.
19:38You need to send $15,000 or he's dead.
19:42You hear me?
19:43He is dead.
19:45Mom!
19:46Can I play ice hockey?
19:49No!
19:53Detective Gonzalez.
19:55Hi, it's Paula Sanders.
19:56Um, you called asking for money.
19:58What do we do?
19:59We ignore him.
20:00This is a nuisance, not a real crime.
20:03Besides, we have nothing to go on.
20:05That's it?
20:05Listen, I'm sorry this happened to you.
20:07I have to run.
20:27Mom?
20:29Mom!
20:30Hazel, I'm in the shower.
20:32Mom, somebody's calling you.
20:34Hazel, don't answer it.
20:37Don't answer it, honey.
20:40Hello?
20:44Hazel!
20:44He said his name was Trevor and he said he would call back.
20:47Why did you answer?
20:49I told you not to.
20:50Right?
20:54Hey, baby.
20:56Shh.
20:57It's okay.
20:57I'm sorry.
20:58It was my fault.
20:59My fault.
21:00Shh.
21:05He was really crying, Mom.
21:07Really?
21:09Yeah.
21:10He was a big crybaby.
21:12He was probably watching Bambi.
21:15Hmm.
21:15Yeah.
21:17Yeah.
21:24Hi.
21:25I love you.
21:27Have so much fun.
21:28And remember, do not poop your pants.
21:31Okay.
21:31No promises.
21:32I love you.
21:33Bye.
21:34Paula.
21:35Paula.
21:36So, I know you said no, but the soccer team still needs a second coach.
21:40I do it, but I ran out of Xanax.
21:42Just kidding.
21:43I have so much Xanax.
21:44But I'm already organizing the dance fundraiser and it is sapping my will to live.
21:48Uh, uh, I...
21:49I never said no.
21:51Oh.
21:52No.
21:52Carl said you weren't interested.
21:56Well, I am interested.
21:58Wait, really?
21:59Yeah.
22:00I'm so interested.
22:01I love...
22:02Soccer's my thing.
22:03Really?
22:03Yeah.
22:04Yay!
22:04Yeah.
22:05That's so fun.
22:05Thank God.
22:06Thank God.
22:07Thanks for asking.
22:07Yeah.
22:08Yeah.
22:08So, the other coach is a dad, Steve.
22:10But don't worry.
22:11He's not a Steve.
22:13I'll grab the equipment for you.
22:14I'll be right back.
22:17Hey.
22:20Well, I heard everyone's downsizing their fact checking departments.
22:23Thank you, AI.
22:25So, how's your LinkedIn?
22:26Tight as fuck.
22:27You?
22:28Oh, I don't have that shit.
22:29I deleted mine.
22:30Why?
22:31I'm gonna stand out by being harder to find.
22:34You know, like, elusive, kind of exclusive.
22:37Let me stop you there.
22:38That's a terrible idea.
22:40Is it, though?
22:41Think about it for a second.
22:43Mmm.
22:44Still terrible.
22:46Okay.
22:47I guess I just disagree.
22:49We're fine.
22:50They'll never get rid of us.
22:56Hello.
22:58Paula.
22:59Paula.
23:00Paula, it's me.
23:02How the fuck did you get this number?
23:07How the fuck did you get my fucking work number?
23:10Please.
23:11Please.
23:12Stop.
23:13Stop.
23:13Please.
23:14Stop it, okay?
23:15He's gonna kill me.
23:17I know it's a scam.
23:18Okay?
23:19I know it.
23:21After all the time we spend together,
23:23after everything that I shared with you,
23:25just admit it, Trevor.
23:26If that's even your real name.
23:29What does it matter?
23:37Either way, you need to pay.
23:40We know everything.
23:42Your job.
23:43Your ex's job.
23:44Cute little Hazel.
23:46We can destroy your life.
23:49I don't want that for you.
23:51I like you, Paula.
23:52You know that.
23:53Pay the money.
23:54Do it now.
24:00We can destroy your life.
24:03This is a lot of bread.
24:04This is an aggressive amount of bread.
24:07I wonder if too much bread is as annoying
24:10to like starving kids in Appalachia.
24:12Really?
24:13Because I don't want a loaf so big
24:15it looks like I have itty bitty baby hands.
24:17You're gonna food shame me?
24:18Do you guys ever watch porn?
24:23Did I hear?
24:23That was...
24:25That's a big change of subject from Paula.
24:29Like on the internet.
24:31As opposed to in a movie theater.
24:32I just read this really weird story
24:35where they said that they can scam you.
24:40Yeah.
24:40Those sites have a lot of malware.
24:42Porn is kind of gross.
24:44Well, sex work isn't gross.
24:46I mean, people need to make a living.
24:47No, bro, I know.
24:49Hashtag sex work is work.
24:50We are all allies.
24:51But like, the industry itself is pretty abusive.
24:54I don't know.
24:54I mean, my roommate has an OnlyFans.
24:56It's no big deal.
24:57Oh, you're a roommate now.
24:58Not your girlfriend.
24:59Oh.
25:00We're just roommates again.
25:02Right.
25:02Because it's cooled off.
25:04Paul only sleeps with you when it's hot out.
25:06Because you're in my air conditioning.
25:07Use of you for Freon.
25:14Are you okay, Paula?
25:15Yeah, fine.
25:19That's a lot of bread.
25:20Fuck.
25:44Fuck.
25:46Fuck.
25:47Fuck.
25:49Fuck.
25:49Fuck.
25:49Alright, Tilly, play your fucking game.
25:56Fuck.
26:00Fuck.
26:02Fuck.
26:14Fuck.
26:16Fuck.
26:16Fuck.
26:17Fuck.
26:17Fuck.
26:17Fuck.
26:18Fuck.
26:18Fuck.
26:18Fuck.
26:19Fuck.
26:20Fuck.
26:20Fuck.
26:21Fuck.
26:29Oh, please, go sit there.
26:39I'm filming you, motherfucker!
26:51Taekwondo!
26:53One!
26:54Taekwondo!
26:55Two!
26:56Taekwondo!
26:57Three!
26:58Taekwondo!
27:00Four!
27:01Taekwondo!
27:02Five!
27:03Taekwondo!
27:05Six!
27:05Taekwondo!
27:07Seven!
27:08Taekwondo!
27:09Eight!
27:10Taekwondo!
27:12Nine!
27:12Taekwondo!
27:14Oh.
27:16How come we never see the stars?
27:18Sorry, what's that?
27:19There's no stars.
27:20You can see the moon, but, like, that's it.
27:25Oh, yeah, it's because it's too bright.
27:28We have all these cars and streetlights and stuff.
27:32Sometimes it just doesn't get dark enough to see the stars.
27:35That really sucks.
27:37Hey, watch it with the S-word.
27:40That is not the S-word.
27:43It's shit, right?
27:46It's shit.
27:47You know, I'm going to take you camping one day.
27:49You won't believe how many stars you can see.
27:52Yeah, you can see so much more in the dark.
28:08It's okay to see the stars, right?
28:10It's a shit.
28:11Oh, yeah, it's a good one!
28:16I'm going to go back!
28:16Big fella.
28:17No, yeah.
28:17You just wanna know?
28:20It's a good one.
28:24Not bad!
28:24You can see your stars.
28:56I think I found him.
28:58Ah, Paula.
29:00No, no, no, no.
29:01You don't understand.
29:02No, I do.
29:03As we thought, it's a scam.
29:06He recorded you.
29:07He has your info.
29:09Okay?
29:09He can CSI enhance and use it against you.
29:12Exactly.
29:13And that's what I did to him.
29:14So he lives in Harding Park.
29:16He's in one of three houses across from Mr. Crab on Kraft Avenue.
29:19It's right by the airport.
29:21See?
29:21So now what do we do?
29:22We continue to investigate.
29:25We're already doing everything we can given the facts.
29:28You're doing everything you can?
29:30I just gave you exactly where he is.
29:35Can't you go check out the houses?
29:38Can't you do fucking anything?
29:40I am trying to explain to you how the system works.
29:46I am an officer of the law.
29:47I am not your gal pal.
29:49This is the real world.
29:51I will continue to look into it.
29:55But as I've told you, change your number.
29:58Put one more barrier between you and him.
30:04We have three major stories in the coming weeks.
30:06So things are going to be really into-
30:09Can I just take this?
30:10Sorry.
30:10Okay.
30:11Yeah.
30:11Hello.
30:12Hey.
30:13How are ya?
30:14Hey, I talked to Mallory.
30:17And if you want Hazel over the holidays, we're okay with it.
30:20We can make that happen for you.
30:21Oh, really?
30:22Yeah, really.
30:23I think you guys will have fun.
30:24Oh.
30:25Yeah.
30:26Yeah.
30:26We will have fun.
30:27That's great.
30:27That's awesome.
30:29All right.
30:29I got to go.
30:30I'm on the Peloton.
30:30I'm about to puke all over Northern Italy.
30:35Hey.
30:36Do you know what I want to do tonight?
30:37What?
30:37I want to go buy a bunch of gifts that we totally don't need.
30:41And then maybe have a bunch of chocolate syrup just in a bowl,
30:44and you can eat it with a spoon.
30:45Or a straw if you want to.
30:47Maybe watch that movie that you really want to watch.
30:49Oh, yeah.
30:50Oh, yeah.
30:50Homework?
30:51No.
30:51You said homework?
30:52No, I didn't.
30:52You want to do homework instead?
30:54No.
30:54No.
30:57I can't twist your arm, you know?
30:59If you love homework so much, then I guess that's what we're going to have to do tonight.
31:03You don't want to have the best day ever?
31:05Yes, I do.
31:05You do?
31:06Yes.
31:06You don't want to do homework?
31:07No.
31:08Boo hoo.
31:09Boo hoo.
31:14Back of my head.
31:16No.
31:17And like some of it got in my ear.
31:19And that's how I got the ear infection.
31:22Rafa?
31:23Otis put hot tamales on my ice cream.
31:27And I was really mad, but I ate it anyway.
31:29You did?
31:30Yep.
31:30Do you want some hot tamales on this?
31:32No.
31:33Why?
31:33No, because it was gross.
31:35Oh.
31:35He's like getting, but ten times bigger.
31:38Whoa, really?
31:38Waska was showing me how to like, like, our feet count.
31:44You're the best sleeper on the town.
31:47Good night.
31:47Good night.
31:49Good night.
31:49Sleep tight.
31:52Yeah, I'm a T-Mobile customer and I'm thinking about changing my number.
31:58Yeah, no, not yet, but how would that work with my contacts and stuff?
32:01Anyone who wants scrambled eggs, time to wake up.
32:04I want Pop-Tarts.
32:07Hey.
32:08Hi, Daddy.
32:09You're seven minutes late.
32:10Hey, how many seconds?
32:11Hi, Mommy.
32:12You have fun?
32:13Bye, baby.
32:13You going inside?
32:14Yep.
32:15I'm going to talk to Mom for a second.
32:16I'll see you right in there, okay?
32:17Okay.
32:20Okay.
32:24What the fuck are you doing, Paula?
32:27What?
32:28There's some guy named Trevor FaceTimed me and he's desperate to talk to you.
32:32Who the fuck is Trevor?
32:34He looked about 20 and strung out.
32:36Is that who you're fucking now?
32:37You fucking midnight cowboy?
32:39You know what he said to me?
32:40He said that I needed to get your attention or he was a dead man.
32:44What the fuck does that even mean?
32:49Please, what does it mean?
32:53But how the fuck did he know about Portland?
32:57Why would you tell him about Portland, Paula?
33:00Why would you tell fucking anyone?
33:05Fucking answer me, please.
33:07I'm lost here.
33:09What is wrong with you?
33:14You know what?
33:15Actually, I'm calling my lawyers and I'm telling them this.
33:17And I'll tell you, Paula, you can forget about seeing Hazel over the holiday.
33:21That's not going to happen.
33:22And if you are acting erratic again, I don't think it's safe for you to be around Hazel unsupervised.
33:28I'm sorry, but it's fucking not.
33:31I need it.
33:33I need that.
33:34I need to see her.
33:34I mean, I knew something was wrong with you.
33:36You can't do that.
33:36But what the fuck is wrong with you?
33:38Carl, you can't do that.
33:39You can't do that.
33:39I can fucking do that.
33:40No, you can't do that to me.
33:41Yes, I can.
33:41Tighten your fucking shit up.
34:07Enough, Freddy!
34:16Becky!
34:17I need help!
34:21Stop fucking calling me.
34:28Fuck.
34:29No!
34:30Up to god damn power.
34:31Come on!
34:32No!
34:33Nothing in the water!
34:36Fuck!
34:37Fuck!
34:38Try the bottom!
36:29Hello?
36:46Hello?
37:11Hello?
37:29Hello?
37:30Hello?
37:30Hello?
37:30Hello?
37:41Hello?
37:50Hello?
37:52Hello?
37:54Hello?
38:04Hello?
38:07Hello?
38:17Hello?
38:18Hello?
38:25Hello?
38:26Hello?
38:38Hello?
38:40Hello?
38:41Hello?
38:44Hello?
38:45Hello?
38:45Hello?
38:47Hello?
39:07Hello?
39:15Hello?
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