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Head Witch In Charge
Transcript
00:00:25Jesus, Mom, can you at least warn me when you're going to do that?
00:00:30please oh please don't be such a child do you still have the wand of light
00:00:45see the all-powerful magic heirloom still safe and sound no you should be more careful
00:00:51the wand of light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires yeah and if it falls into
00:00:58the wrong hands it would become the most dangerous weapon in the world but a marriage to another
00:01:05noble witch family would only strengthen your power yeah less than evil Svensson right
00:01:12the Svensons are our worst enemies Leona do you know how much our family has suffered over the
00:01:18centuries because of them I know sorry you are the guardian of the wand of light Leona and you
00:01:27can't reach your full potential until you marry and succeed me as head of the family come home
00:01:34with a husband next week or I will pick one for you what mom no please don't Leona Sherwood you
00:01:41are
00:01:42getting married whether you like the boy I pick or not mom understand
00:01:49don't worry mom I'm the responsible daughter remember
00:02:01okay Leona Sherwood this is your last weekend of freedom
00:02:09for two more nights
00:02:10you guys fuck my responsibility I'm gonna have some fun
00:02:27thank you that would be 25 dollars
00:02:31I think you mean it's on the house right right it's on the house
00:02:57there you are little Miss Sherwood
00:03:06where the hell are you I'm in Vegas like I said it would be old man
00:03:09hey don't you get smart with me you little
00:03:11shit remember your mission seduce the Sherwood heir and marry her and then that whole obnoxious
00:03:18family will be there to pay off our debts you mean your debts
00:03:22quiet it's bad enough that I have a sorry excuse for an heir you are an embarrassment to the
00:03:28Spence in name now if you don't marry the Sherwood girl like I told you I am going to sell
00:03:34your
00:03:35little sister off to old Fitzgerald to be his fourth wife
00:03:39dad secret is just a kid when I want your opinion I will ask for it until then you shut
00:03:45up and do
00:03:46as I say do you understand yeah I understand good and you keep practicing you sound god-awful
00:03:57it's the heartless fucking bastard
00:04:13it's two of us
00:04:15you're saying you don't remember me
00:04:17who remembers shipping in his dumb teens anyways
00:04:20no way
00:04:21totally
00:04:22I love that show
00:04:23I watched it in one sitting at like 2am
00:04:26this is one of my favorites
00:04:27it definitely doesn't get the love that it deserves
00:04:29but I think it's one of the best ones
00:04:31really
00:04:33I never begged you for a sappy romance kind of guy
00:04:38looks can be deceiving
00:04:44the wand of light
00:04:46so it does exist
00:04:48maybe I'm just jaded
00:04:50it's hard to believe that love like that actually exists in real life
00:04:53why not we're witches monsters and magic exist in our world
00:04:58why can't true love
00:05:01I am lily by the way
00:05:04lily collins
00:05:08eric phillips
00:05:09nice to meet you lily collins
00:05:12damn he's hot
00:05:13and I'm in vegas
00:05:15I deserve a little fun
00:05:16well eric phillips
00:05:19I'll be in the poker room tonight
00:05:21maybe I'll see you there
00:05:22maybe
00:05:26I'll be in the poker room tonight
00:05:42okay Svinson
00:05:44don't fuck this up
00:05:45don't fuck this up
00:05:59Eric motherfucking Svinson
00:06:01excuse me
00:06:01you ghost me for three months after sleeping with me
00:06:04and you think you can sit there and act like nothing happened
00:06:07I think you've got me confused with someone else
00:06:09don't gaslight me Svinson
00:06:11I know exactly who you are
00:06:26you know who she is
00:06:28I think she's got me confused with someone else
00:06:35thank you
00:06:43you nervous
00:06:44not at all
00:06:47you can always fold you know
00:06:49I'd hate to send you home empty-handed
00:06:53not a chance
00:06:55I'm here to win
00:06:57you sure
00:06:58seems like your focus is somewhere else
00:07:01oh
00:07:02I am
00:07:04very focused
00:07:07are you guys done making good eyes at each other or what
00:07:12you're full of
00:07:13you're full of shit Phillips
00:07:13I call
00:07:15yeah there is no way that you have this
00:07:18but don't worry
00:07:20I'll let you go another round
00:07:22once I beat you
00:07:23actually
00:07:24I think I'm about to hit the jackpot
00:07:29Eric
00:07:50I've wanted to do that
00:07:51since I saw you by the pool in your bikini
00:07:53Eric
00:07:54everyone can see
00:07:56do you want me to stop
00:08:12let's see
00:08:13let him watch
00:08:16give him a show
00:08:28wait please don't stop
00:08:31use your words
00:08:33tell me what you want
00:08:34I want your tongue inside me
00:08:37please
00:08:38that's a good girl
00:08:41oh
00:08:45Eric
00:08:49wait
00:08:49wait
00:08:50wait
00:08:50I think I'm gonna
00:08:53was that some kind of vision
00:08:58no
00:08:59that was from him
00:09:08lucky son of a
00:09:10bitch
00:09:10beginner lux
00:09:12let's see you do it again next hand
00:09:14no can do
00:09:16I have a date with a
00:09:18very pretty lady
00:09:24why do I have the feeling that you're not exactly as you present
00:09:28Eric
00:09:29Phillips
00:09:31it is
00:09:31it is Vegas
00:09:33isn't that part of the fun
00:09:46what do I have the feeling that you're not going to do it again next time
00:09:47it wasn't very nice of you
00:09:49to tease me with your strap of your dress during our game
00:09:52hmm
00:09:53it's very distracting
00:09:57well you know it wasn't very nice of you
00:10:00to send me that little vision during our game
00:10:03I just wanted to give you a little sneak preview
00:10:13Eric there are people
00:10:15and if you're quiet
00:10:17they won't see you
00:10:21I should stop
00:10:22this wasn't how the plan was supposed to go
00:10:24you knew you were right before
00:10:26I'm not who I say I am
00:10:28and who out there is exactly as they present
00:10:32but I am
00:10:33look I don't care who you are outside of this
00:10:36for once in my life I
00:10:39I just want to forget about everything
00:10:42just live in the moment
00:10:44and I think you
00:10:47can help me do that
00:10:55remove the camouflage
00:10:57I want you to see you
00:10:59the real you
00:11:02but then you'll know who I am
00:11:04I already know who you are
00:11:07the real you
00:11:09wants to let go
00:11:15no one's ever looked at me like that
00:11:18he really wants me
00:11:20the real me
00:11:21fuck
00:11:23you are gorgeous
00:11:27i want you eric
00:11:30i need you
00:11:35spread your legs for me
00:11:41keep your eyes open
00:11:44i want you to watch yourself
00:11:46come
00:11:47come all over my fingers
00:11:53keep your eyes open
00:11:59i thought you said that they couldn't hear me
00:12:02they can if you stay quiet
00:12:04keep your eyes open
00:12:05or i'll stop
00:12:10that's a good girl
00:12:12that's a good girl
00:12:13went down in my head
00:12:18oh my god they hurt me
00:12:21i can't
00:12:23just relax
00:12:24i can't eric
00:12:41i can't wait to put my mouth on you
00:12:53i can't wait to put my mouth on you
00:12:57go
00:12:57five
00:13:00one
00:13:01four
00:13:03two
00:13:07four
00:13:28I can't believe I just came on his hand in front of other people.
00:13:33I think this is your floor.
00:13:41I'll be at the fountain tomorrow at 8 o'clock.
00:13:45If you decide that you want more.
00:13:47See you there.
00:13:58How did he know what floor I was on?
00:14:05So you've told me all about your wild sister and the things that she's done.
00:14:11What about you?
00:14:15I'm the responsible sister.
00:14:17The boring one, if you will.
00:14:20And I do what I'm supposed to do.
00:14:22Follow the rules and all that good stuff.
00:14:25I don't believe you.
00:14:26I do. I mean, I know how you are in an elevator.
00:14:29Oh, come on.
00:14:32Come on.
00:14:34It's Vegas.
00:14:35Let me be your bad influence.
00:14:37Just for tonight.
00:14:41So, any bad ideas?
00:14:47Just one.
00:14:54What are you doing?
00:15:12No games.
00:15:13Just fuck me already.
00:15:15I thought I would try to woo you first.
00:15:16Consider me wooed.
00:15:18Then we could take it slow?
00:15:19Oh, your lips say one thing.
00:15:21But your body says something else.
00:15:35Wait.
00:15:37Shit.
00:15:39I almost lost my cool.
00:15:40I gotta remember the plan.
00:15:44Oh, my God.
00:15:45I can't believe I just did that.
00:15:47That was so embarrassing.
00:15:48This is why I don't do crazy shit.
00:15:50That was way too much.
00:15:51Hey.
00:15:52You're never too much.
00:15:54You don't understand, Eric.
00:15:56Okay, if my family saw me do any of that, they would freak out.
00:15:59Tonight's not about your family.
00:16:01Tonight's about you.
00:16:02Remember?
00:16:03Forget what everyone else has told you to do.
00:16:06Do something that you want to do.
00:16:08Something no one would expect.
00:16:10Maybe he's right.
00:16:12I've spent my whole life doing what my family's told me to do.
00:16:18For once in my life, I'm doing something for myself.
00:16:22She spotted the chapel.
00:16:25Just like I planned.
00:16:29So, are you, uh, you sure about this marriage thing?
00:16:32It's only temporary.
00:16:34Okay, and old magic is weak.
00:16:35The hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning.
00:16:39So, are you ready for a holy matrimony?
00:16:42I'm ready if you're ready.
00:16:45Come on.
00:16:49Let's go.
00:16:55You're nervous?
00:16:58Just, never been married before.
00:17:07Uh, it's my sister.
00:17:08I need to take this.
00:17:09Oh, yeah, take your time.
00:17:11Elvis here wants me to pick out a hand fast bouquet.
00:17:14Hey, mama, let's get some flowers for you.
00:17:15Come on.
00:17:15Let's do it.
00:17:17You need to come home, now.
00:17:19I can't, secret.
00:17:21Eric, Dad's up to something.
00:17:22He invited Fitzgerald to the house and made me dress up.
00:17:26He looks at me weird.
00:17:27It really freaks me out.
00:17:28You were my big brother, E.
00:17:30I need you here.
00:17:32Listen, I can't leave right now, but I promise when I come home, I'll have enough power to
00:17:36get rid of Dad forever, okay?
00:17:41Hey.
00:17:43Is everything okay?
00:17:45Yeah.
00:17:48Yeah, it's fine.
00:17:51You, uh, you sure about this?
00:17:54It's only temporary.
00:17:56Come on, we'll be laughing about this for years.
00:18:02Let's go.
00:18:18Right, only temporary.
00:18:20Unless you get hand fasted under a full moon, then the hand fast bond is nearly unbreakable.
00:18:26But she doesn't know that.
00:18:27And once she does, she'll hate me.
00:18:31Is your sister okay?
00:18:33Is something wrong?
00:18:36Nothing's wrong.
00:18:37We're about to get married in Vegas by Ovis.
00:18:40What could possibly be wrong?
00:18:43All right, you ready to rock and roll, you hunk-a-hunk-a-hot couple?
00:18:47Let's get this show started.
00:18:49Let's go.
00:18:49Let's go.
00:19:10Let's go.
00:19:16This is it, I have the Wand of Light, the most powerful object in the world.
00:19:23If I leave now, I could use it to take control away from my father, set Sigrid and I free.
00:19:35But I already betrayed her once.
00:20:19Off to get more chocolate strawberries, be back soon.
00:20:32It's only temporary, okay, and old magic is weak.
00:20:35The hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning.
00:20:38Hmm, that's weird.
00:20:41The mark should have worn off by now.
00:20:51So, did you marry the girl yet?
00:20:56No, it's complicated.
00:21:00Complicated?
00:21:01Or distracted?
00:21:03You were sent there to marry the Sherwood heir and bind her power to this family, not to play house.
00:21:10You're a Svensson.
00:21:11Act like one.
00:21:12Eric is a Svensson?
00:21:15I married my family's worst enemy?
00:21:18I don't need you to tell me what I am.
00:21:21Then stop hesitating!
00:21:22If the rumors about the Wand of Light are true, we might catch an even bigger prize.
00:21:28So hurry up and marry the Sherwood girl and then bring her to me!
00:21:33Idiot!
00:21:41He's been lying this whole time.
00:21:49I need to tell her the truth.
00:21:53You lying piece of troll shit!
00:21:56You didn't want me, you just wanted the fucking wand, didn't you?
00:22:01I didn't even know the wand existed until I met you.
00:22:03You still lied to me, Eric!
00:22:05You knew I was a Sherwood from the start!
00:22:07That's why you gave me a fake fucking name, right?
00:22:09Okay, I did, but that was before we-
00:22:11Why before?
00:22:11Before you decided to mess with me?
00:22:13Get your dick wet before you ruin me and my family forever?
00:22:17I'm not trying to ruin your family, I'm trying to save mine!
00:22:19Oh, I know all about you, Svensons!
00:22:22All you do is lie and cheat and steal to get whatever you fucking want!
00:22:27I should have caught it at the poker table, but your little tricks won't work on me this time!
00:22:32The hand fast mark, it'll fade!
00:22:35Just like you, just like whatever this was!
00:22:38The hand fast wasn't a trick, not that part!
00:22:41Not with you!
00:22:43It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:22:45You will never, ever get the wand!
00:22:49Lili, what?
00:22:51When this fades, Eric, I will never have to see you again!
00:23:08So, that didn't happen.
00:23:12My older sister Effie told me that the mark would fade a week later.
00:23:17Then a month went by...
00:23:19Then...
00:23:21Well...
00:23:25See, this is why you don't fuck with old magic.
00:23:28It's all fun and games till there's a full moon.
00:23:30Then it's the most powerful magic in the universe.
00:23:37Apparently, getting hand fast married under a full moon creates a bond that's almost unbreakable.
00:23:44Also, apparently, the almost part means that both people have to perform the divorce spell.
00:23:52I tried calling.
00:23:54Texting.
00:23:55Sending flying monkeys.
00:23:57Nothing.
00:23:58Not a single word from my beloved husband.
00:24:02For half a year.
00:24:12Yes, I still sleep with a wand under my pillow.
00:24:16The emotional ass whooping I got from my mother for getting hand fasted to a stranger was bad enough.
00:24:22No one can ever find out that I almost lost the wand too.
00:24:25I just need one night to sleep without thinking about him.
00:24:54Who are you?
00:24:55What do you want with the wand of light?
00:24:58Nothing.
00:24:59I'm just here to collect my payday from my client once I bring him that wand.
00:25:04Payday?
00:25:06Someone sent you!
00:25:07Who?
00:25:08I'm afraid I can't break client confidentiality.
00:25:10Sorry, sweetie.
00:25:13Well, I'm afraid that you chose the wrong witch to fuck with tonight.
00:25:29be wise not to fight back witch.
00:25:31urine over your head,
00:25:34I'd rather die than when you take the horn.
00:25:39Suit yourself.
00:25:44Suit yourself.
00:25:53What the fuck?
00:26:08Get off me, she has the wand!
00:26:11I got the wand. I'll get the rest later.
00:26:16No!
00:26:20You are the reason I lost the wand. Who are you?
00:26:29The hand fast mark.
00:26:34Hello, wife. Miss me?
00:26:39What are you doing here?
00:26:41Well, you know, I thought I'd spice up our marriage, do a little role-playing,
00:26:44but it looks like you're more into bondage.
00:26:47I didn't know you were so kinky.
00:26:48Shut up!
00:26:52You should be thanking me. I did just save your home.
00:26:55Thanking you?
00:26:56You're the reason my family's most powerful heirloom is gone.
00:26:59How did you even find me?
00:27:02Wait a minute.
00:27:04You were trying to steal the wand, too, weren't you?
00:27:07Maybe.
00:27:09God, you slimy, tote-faced motherfucker!
00:27:13Okay, first, you tricked me into marrying you,
00:27:15then you ghost me for six months,
00:27:17and now you come in here like a goddamn fucking cartoon burglar
00:27:21and try to take my wand!
00:27:23Look, I was just going to borrow it.
00:27:25Yeah, for one of your dirty, no-good-spensing schemes?
00:27:29I just... I need it.
00:27:31Okay? It's... it's the only way that we can be free.
00:27:36Look, my dad doesn't know about our marriage.
00:27:38Not yet.
00:27:39But he knows about the wand.
00:27:40If he gets a hold of it, he's going to sell it to the highest bidder.
00:27:43Whoever controls the wand has the power to take over the world.
00:27:46Or worse.
00:27:47No!
00:27:48Worse than tricking me into marrying you?
00:27:50I told you that that wasn't a trick.
00:27:52It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:27:54She has the wand, that shadow thief or whatever.
00:27:58And that's your fault!
00:27:59I can get it back.
00:28:02Look, I know I don't deserve it.
00:28:03But just give me one more chance.
00:28:06I can get the wand back,
00:28:08take care of what I need to take care of,
00:28:09and then I'll do the divorce spell.
00:28:12Please, Lily, just give me one more chance.
00:28:14Please.
00:28:15I can't trust him.
00:28:17I shouldn't.
00:28:19But my gut tells me
00:28:21this time
00:28:23it might be different.
00:28:29No.
00:28:31No, we're both going to go get it.
00:28:34It is my job as a Sherwood heir
00:28:36to set things right
00:28:37so I don't let the wand fall into the wrong hands.
00:28:41And you really think after Vegas
00:28:42I would let you go alone
00:28:43to find the most powerful, magical object
00:28:46in the entire world?
00:28:48Fair.
00:28:49Whatever you want, Lily.
00:28:52God, I hate when you call me that.
00:28:54All right, I'll call you wife.
00:28:57And you can call me whatever you want.
00:29:00Eric, husband, daddy.
00:29:02Shut up!
00:29:03Don't call me wife either.
00:29:05After we get this wand,
00:29:06we will do the divorce spell.
00:29:07Got it?
00:29:08You're breaking my heart.
00:29:09I mean, you're the better half of my soul.
00:29:13Yeah, you're not going to sweet-talk
00:29:14your way into my pants again, Eric.
00:29:16We'll see.
00:29:22Now, the wand forbids a direct tracking spell,
00:29:24so we have to track its trail.
00:29:27That's a ten-mile radius.
00:29:29We'll never find a wand inside that circle.
00:29:31Well, with the tracking spell,
00:29:32I get a location, okay?
00:29:34It doesn't last long, though.
00:29:36We'll have like three or four days.
00:29:37Well, lucky for you,
00:29:39I already packed our bags.
00:29:42Consider it our official honeymoon.
00:29:48Aja, this, we're done.
00:29:49You got it?
00:29:50Don't go back on your words, Benson.
00:29:52We will do the divorce spell.
00:29:54Cross my heart.
00:29:56Hope to die.
00:30:15You imagined a car here?
00:30:17This isn't just any car.
00:30:25This is Bessie.
00:30:27You really expect us to track down
00:30:29the most powerful, magical object in the world?
00:30:32In a car without a roof?
00:30:34I mean, if you're not comfortable,
00:30:40I could go by myself.
00:30:42If you trust me not to run away.
00:30:46I wouldn't trust you with a half-eaten newt muffin.
00:30:49I was going to throw in the trash.
00:30:53Then your chariot awaits.
00:30:55Wife.
00:31:15Well, you've been driving all day,
00:31:17and she hasn't said a single word.
00:31:30You're Svensson.
00:31:32You don't play house with sheriffs.
00:31:33Why are we turning?
00:31:35We don't have any time.
00:31:36We have to find the wand, Eric.
00:31:39That circle is getting further and further away.
00:31:42Plus, it's getting dark.
00:31:43We need to stay somewhere for the night.
00:31:44Why don't you just let me drive?
00:31:45Because you haven't slept either.
00:31:48Plus, no one can drive Bessie but me.
00:31:51What is with guys and cars?
00:31:53Jesus.
00:31:53No.
00:31:54I mean, literally, no one else can drive Bessie.
00:31:57My great-great-grandfather put a hex on all of our possessions.
00:32:00Anyone that's non-blood related can't touch it.
00:32:03The Svensson's like to hoard their treasures.
00:32:06Your family has issues.
00:32:08Finally.
00:32:09Something we could agree on.
00:32:11Was this your plan all along?
00:32:13Make me feel bad for you because your family's evil,
00:32:15so I get all ooey-gooey and forget about the divorce?
00:32:18Not everyone in my family is evil.
00:32:21Yeah.
00:32:35You cross this wall or do anything to piss me off
00:32:38more than you already have,
00:32:40then you do not even want to imagine
00:32:41the hex I'm going to put on you.
00:32:48I promise, no funny business.
00:32:52Peek your promise.
00:33:13Good night to you, too.
00:33:28In Vegas,
00:33:30you said you had a sister, right?
00:33:34Yeah.
00:33:36Sigrid.
00:33:38She didn't ask to be a Svensson.
00:33:41She's different than us.
00:33:43Better.
00:33:45Not like you?
00:33:46No.
00:33:49Not like me.
00:33:50But you already know that.
00:33:51No.
00:33:53No.
00:34:05No.
00:34:07No.
00:34:43Good morning, wife.
00:34:46I told you not to call me.
00:35:04You were saying something?
00:35:07What?
00:35:10How did you know I was awake?
00:35:13The husband always knows.
00:35:21Well, if you don't mind, I'm going to shower.
00:35:27No peeking.
00:35:32Crossed my heart.
00:35:34Hope to die.
00:35:42I need to get a grip.
00:35:45Some washboard ads and a cocky grin aren't enough to make me fall for him.
00:35:49I just need this one time to take the edge off.
00:36:02I remember he touched me like this in Vegas.
00:36:17Look, I'm so close.
00:36:24I'm so close.
00:36:37Are you ready?
00:36:42Eric!
00:36:57You said that you wouldn't look.
00:37:01i don't need to look to know what you were doing while thinking about me
00:37:07god you are so full of yourself do i know what i heard say another word and i'll turn you
00:37:13into a
00:37:13frog were you thinking about that time in vegas where i ate you out in the shower
00:37:23you came so hard you almost crushed my skull between your thighs i think about those times a lot
00:37:32yeah well i don't think about them at all
00:37:59you still haven't even told me what you won't go on for yet
00:38:02it's on a need to know basis oh don't you think i need to know i am your wife after
00:38:10all
00:38:10oh now you remember you're my wife funny how you only remember that once convenient for you
00:38:15i remember every time i think about how badly i fucked up in vegas so all i am is a
00:38:20mistake
00:38:20if i remember right you're the one that suggested that we get handfast married obviously that was
00:38:25before i knew about all your bullshit and lies duty and responsibility might not be a big deal in your
00:38:31family but in mine it's huge see there you go again always worried about what your family wants
00:38:38it's never about what you want i follow the rules because i have to eric if i don't i end
00:38:44up in
00:38:44situations like this did you ever stop to think that maybe that's unfair that maybe you're
00:38:50your ideas and their ideas are bullshit you ever think of that spoken like a true spinson well
00:38:56you're a spinson too sweetheart not much longer i can tell you that
00:39:19i want to get some coffee it's getting dark you really think you should be alone so now that
00:39:23we're married you think you have to babysit me too
00:39:30fine just don't take too long
00:39:35you got her in the car or what who don't play done with me boy the little sherwood witch you
00:39:42married forgot to tell me about
00:39:46you thought i wouldn't find out huh you did a good job of hiding it i'll give you that
00:39:51maybe you are my son after all huh what's the end game here you said you just needed to get
00:39:57the
00:39:57sherwood's wand so you could pay off your debts what does she have to do with it because i'm not
00:40:01an idiot like you i'll finally have all the leverage i need over the sherwood family when i
00:40:08tell them their pretty little heir is my new daughter-in-law and then it'll be our family that
00:40:14gets to call the shots in the magic world so you just want to use her like you use mom
00:40:19like you're
00:40:20using your own daughter this is not a request boy bring the girl and the wand to me or you
00:40:26will be stripped of your name your magic everything and your sister she'll be the one paying the price
00:40:32for your mistakes
00:40:44this isn't right the trail should still be here
00:40:48would you like some coffee ms sherwood yeah thank you wait how did you know my
00:40:54you
00:40:58but the map said that that's cute you think that dusty old map could track me
00:41:09that wand is mine
00:41:14not anymore it's not and sadly
00:41:16my employers need your powers too
00:41:18employer
00:41:22this will only hurt a bit
00:41:25no stop stop
00:41:33get away from her
00:41:40eric the wand
00:41:53my magic
00:41:55she took half of my magic eric
00:41:57you're okay i got you
00:42:00you're okay
00:42:03i don't understand the map said that the wand was miles away what did she want with my powers
00:42:09thief must have found some way to bypass the tracking spell
00:42:13she can have gone far we'll find her lay low for now
00:42:16eric stop the car i can't breathe
00:42:19okay
00:42:29hey hey hey look at me look at me you're okay you're okay just breathe i got you you're safe
00:42:37i thought she was gonna kill me
00:42:41i'm not gonna let that happen
00:42:43i'm not gonna let that happen
00:42:44not while i'm breathing
00:42:57i still hate you
00:43:01if you hated me
00:43:03you wouldn't let me touch you like this
00:43:05this doesn't change anything
00:43:08it's only scratching an itch
00:43:10once we get the wand
00:43:12and we do the divorce spell
00:43:14now we forget each other existed
00:43:21is that what you want lili
00:43:23you want to forget how good i make you feel
00:43:26you want to forget
00:43:27i'm the only person in the whole fucking world
00:43:30who can make you feel this way
00:43:36eric
00:43:39wait wait
00:43:41wait wait wait
00:43:47we can't do this
00:43:50this is what goes wrong between us
00:43:52we can't make that mistake again
00:43:54we have a job to do eric
00:43:56let's get the wand
00:43:57that's it
00:43:59and then what
00:44:01you know what happens after eric
00:44:03we do the divorce spell
00:44:05and we never see each other again
00:44:39smells like fresh baked pastries
00:44:41cinnamon
00:44:45old magic
00:44:48i should have known
00:44:50it's a seder's inn
00:44:53that spell
00:44:54an almond inhabitant smell
00:44:57it's woven into places like this
00:44:59for
00:45:00couples
00:45:02you mean or cheese
00:45:05seders are the horniest bastards
00:45:07in the lone world
00:45:08it lowers any fear
00:45:11doubt
00:45:12shame
00:45:13grancy or deepest desires
00:45:16without any fear of
00:45:18judgment
00:45:19or
00:45:21consequences
00:45:28eric don't
00:45:31i'm trying not to
00:45:42i'm trying not to
00:45:50a spell
00:45:52a spell
00:45:52doesn't create desire
00:45:54He lets go of the lies
00:45:57Tells us what we really want
00:45:59What I want doesn't matter
00:46:02It matters in here
00:46:05Tell me what you really want
00:46:07You can say goodbye
00:46:09And go our separate ways
00:46:11Or you can tell me you want this
00:46:15You want me
00:46:18Tell me to stay
00:46:22Stay
00:46:24Please
00:46:25God what is this
00:46:27Is this just the magic
00:46:32It's not the spell
00:46:34It's freedom
00:46:37You can hear the outside world
00:46:38It doesn't matter
00:46:39Just you
00:46:41And me
00:46:44I shouldn't want this
00:46:45I know
00:46:49I shouldn't be doing this
00:46:53Or that
00:46:55Leona
00:46:56Share with
00:46:57To the most respected family of the whole rich world
00:47:01You definitely shouldn't sound this fucking sexy
00:47:04To mind
00:47:07You're with the air
00:47:08To the Sherwood family
00:47:12Who are you?
00:47:14I want you, Eric
00:47:16I need you
00:47:17Tell me who you are
00:47:24Leely
00:47:24Close
00:47:29But not quite
00:47:31Tonight
00:47:33Tell me who you are
00:47:35Your wife
00:48:01This doesn't change anything
00:48:03I know
00:48:05We can have tonight
00:48:06And then
00:48:07Tomorrow we go back
00:48:08To who we are
00:48:08On the outside
00:48:10Sure
00:48:11I'll go back
00:48:12To being my bad self
00:48:13And you can
00:48:13Go back to pretending
00:48:14To be a good little witch
00:48:17Excuse me
00:48:18Don't deny
00:48:19Leely
00:48:19Share with
00:48:20Svinsen
00:48:20I know
00:48:21I'm kind of
00:48:22Dork
00:48:23Naughty
00:48:24Thought you
00:48:26I don't
00:48:28It's okay
00:48:29To be bad
00:48:31You don't have to
00:48:32Pretend
00:48:34I don't
00:48:35Huh
00:48:39You know
00:48:40Just because
00:48:40I have half my magic
00:48:41Doesn't mean
00:48:42I can't play
00:48:43With you
00:48:43For tonight
00:48:55Now you're gonna sit there
00:48:58Like a good
00:49:00Little
00:49:01Witch
00:49:06And I'm
00:49:08Gonna do
00:49:09Whatever
00:49:10I
00:49:11Want
00:49:14To you
00:49:19I don't remember
00:49:20Packing that lingerie
00:49:21Close your eyes
00:49:25Eric you're so good
00:49:27For being such
00:49:29A bad boy
00:49:31I'm
00:49:31Being properly
00:49:33Motivated
00:49:36Not to move
00:49:38See how long
00:49:39It takes you to break
00:49:41For you I could stay here forever
00:49:43Pretty to think so
00:49:45Why don't we test that little theory
00:49:47Huh
00:49:48We're playing a dangerous
00:49:50Game
00:49:51Hmm
00:49:51All you have to do
00:49:55Is admit that I win
00:49:57I'll let you fuck me
00:49:59I'll even
00:50:01Let you come wherever you want
00:50:06You can come here
00:50:09Or here
00:50:12I'll even
00:50:14Let you come in here
00:50:16God
00:50:18Come on
00:50:20I know you wanna
00:50:22Just admit
00:50:24That I'm right
00:50:27Fine
00:50:28You win
00:50:30What was that
00:50:32You hurt me
00:50:42So what's my prize
00:50:48I could
00:50:49Torture you
00:50:50Like you did me
00:50:53But I wanna be inside you
00:50:55I wanna feel you
00:50:56Squeeze me tight
00:50:59And take me to bed
00:51:00Husband
00:51:04Call me that again
00:51:08You want me to fuck you
00:51:09Husband
00:51:10Yeah
00:51:11Fuck me
00:51:20Tell me a story
00:51:24Like the ones you did in Vegas
00:51:27I've got a story about
00:51:29My pet goat Gilmore
00:51:31And how he got stuck
00:51:33On a magic carpet
00:51:34Or the story about
00:51:36How my sister tried to
00:51:37Negotiate with a troll
00:51:39Using only red images
00:51:40I know
00:51:43I already know about your family
00:51:47I wanna know about you
00:51:50What's it like to be a Svensson heir
00:51:52You want the insider info
00:51:56You tell me yours
00:51:57I'll tell you mine
00:51:58You gonna tell me how
00:51:59Wonderful it was
00:52:01Growing up as a
00:52:02Beloved and blessed
00:52:03Sherwood
00:52:07Is that what you think
00:52:08Being a Sherwood is like?
00:52:11Is that what you think
00:52:12Being a Sherwood is like?
00:52:14All fun and rainbows?
00:52:16Yeah
00:52:16Everybody loves your family
00:52:17That's not true
00:52:19Eric
00:52:19There are so many people
00:52:21Who would love it
00:52:22If we just disappeared
00:52:23My mother has been
00:52:24Shouldering all that
00:52:25Responsibility and pressure
00:52:27For decades
00:52:27And next year
00:52:29I will be the
00:52:30Headwitch in charge
00:52:32Everyone's counting on me
00:52:33To do the right thing
00:52:33Like eat your fruits and veggies?
00:52:35Like spending my whole
00:52:37Childhood being told
00:52:38That the whole world
00:52:39Depended on me
00:52:41Like never bothering
00:52:43To have any hopes
00:52:44Or dreams
00:52:45Because my whole life
00:52:47Was planned for me
00:52:47From the very start
00:52:48Before I was even born
00:52:49I'm always doing
00:52:51The right thing
00:52:51For the family
00:52:52I was never allowed
00:52:53To even think
00:52:54Of doing the wrong thing
00:52:56I couldn't be tired
00:52:57I couldn't be scared
00:52:59I couldn't be angry
00:53:00One mistake
00:53:01And my family
00:53:02Loses everything
00:53:03That they've ever worked for
00:53:04If this whole world
00:53:05Pades to black
00:53:06It's because
00:53:06I messed up
00:53:08It's because
00:53:08I didn't do a good job
00:53:13I don't think
00:53:14I've ever said that
00:53:15Out loud before
00:53:16I'm glad you did
00:53:19Your turn
00:53:21Growing up
00:53:22Of Svinson was
00:53:24A little different
00:53:26The old man likes to say
00:53:27I was
00:53:29The first of his
00:53:30Disappointments
00:53:31I guess it's good
00:53:33At least I was
00:53:34First in something
00:53:36I didn't care about
00:53:37Disappointing him
00:53:38I just wanted to
00:53:39Get away from him
00:53:41I had it all planned out
00:53:42When
00:53:43I turned 16
00:53:44I'd leave
00:53:45Change my name
00:53:46And the Svinson bloodline
00:53:47Would die with me
00:53:48My mom died
00:53:49When Secret was born
00:53:53My dad used
00:53:54Her against me
00:53:56Every day since
00:54:03I'm so sorry
00:54:04Eric
00:54:04I
00:54:06You shouldn't have asked
00:54:09It's okay
00:54:11Svinsons have always
00:54:12Lived in the Sherwood
00:54:12Shadows
00:54:14We are the shadows
00:54:18All you do is shine
00:54:30He always asks me
00:54:31What I want
00:54:34What do you want
00:54:36Eric
00:54:39You'd hate me
00:54:39If I told you
00:54:41I mean
00:54:42More than you already do
00:54:46I don't hate you
00:54:49I never did
00:54:58I don't want to
00:54:58I don't want to
00:55:01I don't want to
00:55:03I don't want to
00:55:07I don't want to
00:55:09I don't want to
00:55:11I don't want to
00:55:11I don't want to
00:55:12I don't want to
00:55:13I don't want to
00:55:14I don't want to
00:55:15I don't want to
00:55:18I don't want to
00:55:25Eric, something's wrong
00:55:27Dad's got visitors
00:55:28A bunch of old guys, I don't know who they are
00:55:31He made me play piano for them
00:55:33Like some kind of dress-up doll
00:55:35It's like freaking me out
00:55:41Eric
00:55:43Are you safe?
00:55:48Eric
00:55:49Are you safe?
00:55:50For now
00:55:51All those weird old men lived last night
00:55:55And I hexed my door so no one could get in
00:55:58Don't let anyone in
00:55:59If Dad tries to get you to play with any of those weird old men
00:56:01I know
00:56:03I'll just do what he says
00:56:06I always do
00:56:08I'm so sick of this E
00:56:09What if he actually does make me marry one of those guys?
00:56:12I'm never gonna let that happen, alright?
00:56:15Look
00:56:16I'm close to getting the wand of life
00:56:18The wand of light?
00:56:21Like
00:56:21The one from the fairy tales?
00:56:24You can't tell Dad secret
00:56:26When I get the wand
00:56:28Be ready for my call
00:56:30I have a plan
00:56:31I barely know basic spells
00:56:35I don't know if...
00:56:36You can
00:56:37I know you can
00:56:39When the time is right, you'll be ready
00:57:07Filling up Bessie
00:57:08Meet me downstairs when you're ready
00:57:20Oh my god
00:57:22Why do you and mom always do that?
00:57:24A bit high-strung, aren't you, sis?
00:57:28I was just in the middle of thinking
00:57:29Yeah, and going by your aura, I can guess about who
00:57:32Very much giving post-orgasmic afterglow
00:57:36Aw, yeah, well you and your little aura reading can go jump in a lake
00:57:40Oh, aren't we feisty this morning?
00:57:43Your super hot hubby isn't around, I'm guessing?
00:57:45Or have you already murdered him after catching his dick?
00:57:48I know all the best places tied a body, by the way
00:57:52I'm fine, Effie
00:57:54I know all about Eric Spenson
00:57:55I'm not stupid
00:57:57And when we get the wand back
00:57:59You mean if you get the wand back?
00:58:01We will
00:58:03And when we do
00:58:04We'll do the divorce spell
00:58:06This mark will be gone
00:58:08I'll go home and
00:58:10Marry the best person who serves our family alliance
00:58:16It's not fair, you know
00:58:18I know I'm the last person who should be saying that
00:58:21Because it's not like I can change it
00:58:23But it's not
00:58:26It's just the way it goes, right?
00:58:28There has to be a way for you to be with who you actually want
00:58:31And be a good heir
00:58:35Effie, what I want has nothing to do with anything in my life
00:58:39That's fine
00:58:40It's what it means to be a Sherwood
00:58:43Just remember
00:58:44Repeating it doesn't make it true
00:58:48Alright
00:58:50Whatever you say, sis
00:58:51You know best
00:58:54I know
00:58:55Give everyone a hug from me
00:58:57Tell them I'll be back home soon
00:59:08Last night was the last time
00:59:10After today, we're done
00:59:13If I say that enough times
00:59:15Maybe I'll finally believe it
00:59:26I'll tell you about my plan with the wand
00:59:30My family's magic is dying
00:59:32My father's been cashing in on broken promises for years
00:59:35But he holds most of the power
00:59:37And me and Sieg would just get the scraps
00:59:39That's how he controls us
00:59:42If I could use the wand just once
00:59:44If I could use the wand just once
00:59:44I could take his power away from the bread
00:59:47I'm not trying to ruin your family
00:59:49I'm trying to save mine
00:59:50It's the only way that we can be free
00:59:54That's what you meant by trying to save your family
00:59:58I was gonna tell you the night before
01:00:00I was gonna tell you the truth
01:00:01And then I was just gonna ask if I could use the wand
01:00:04Just once
01:00:05And then I would do whatever you want
01:00:08Get a divorce
01:00:09Leave you alone forever
01:00:12Why didn't you tell me?
01:00:16Why didn't you tell me that morning?
01:00:18Maybe things could have been different
01:00:21I would have asked you to stay
01:00:23It's a nice idea
01:00:26But our families have been at war
01:00:27Since the beginning of time
01:00:30Maybe if we were different people
01:00:33We have different lives
01:00:35This would have worked
01:00:37Maybe we can work
01:00:40Maybe the wand has a spell for that, Eric
01:00:42A witch can hope
01:00:51What?
01:00:53Do I have mushrooms growing out of the side of my head?
01:00:55Why are you looking at me like that?
01:01:10Wait, I'm driving
01:01:12Pull over
01:01:31You have got to be kidding me
01:01:39End of the line, witches
01:01:49No
01:01:51No
01:01:52No
01:01:52No
01:01:53No
01:01:54No
01:02:06No
01:02:07No
01:02:07No
01:02:28Now's not a good time, old man.
01:02:30Well, it sounds like my insurance policy worked.
01:02:34You...
01:02:36You shoot the Shadow Thief?
01:02:37Of course I sent her.
01:02:39Do you think I would trust you to finish the job?
01:02:53Demons are very expensive, you know?
01:02:57But I thought that the Sherwood girl's soul in exchange for the wand was a good enough bargain.
01:03:04Souls of magic users apparently taste better.
01:03:19You said you needed her alive.
01:03:21The Sherwoods will never pay off your debts if you kill their heir.
01:03:23I've reconsidered.
01:03:25Once I have that wand, I will be the most powerful witch alive.
01:03:30Debts won't matter.
01:03:32The stupid Sherwoods won't matter.
01:03:34And as for the girl, well...
01:03:35I don't need her breathing to use her power.
01:03:39I can always marry Sigrid off to form new alliances.
01:03:43Guess you won't be trapped in a marriage after all, son.
01:03:48You're welcome.
01:03:51Go to hell, old man.
01:04:03Take it!
01:04:06No!
01:04:08Your soul will be delicious!
01:04:17I can take Dad's magic.
01:04:19End him.
01:04:21Finally be free.
01:04:26Get off my wife!
01:04:35You'll pay for that, witch!
01:04:48This isn't the last you'll see of me.
01:04:56Hey, I've got you.
01:04:57You didn't run.
01:04:59You're kidding?
01:05:00I'd be your pretty shitty husband if I let my wife's soul get sucked out by a demon.
01:05:07Eric!
01:05:08You can't get rid of me that usually.
01:05:10No, no, no, no, no, stay with me.
01:05:12Eric!
01:05:13Oh my God!
01:05:15Eric, no, no, no, no, no, stay with me.
01:05:17Oh my God!
01:05:19I can't save you.
01:05:21I don't have my powers.
01:05:23I need you to run.
01:05:26You could have saved yourself.
01:05:28I've been saving myself my whole life.
01:05:33I thought I'd try something new.
01:05:36You idiot, you stupid, stupid idiot.
01:05:40Yeah.
01:05:42But I'm your idiot.
01:05:45I'm your idiot.
01:05:50You took a devil for a spell.
01:05:53I had a promise.
01:05:55Now you're free.
01:05:59I don't want to be free.
01:06:02I don't want to be free.
01:06:05I don't want to be with you.
01:06:07Just keep secrets safe.
01:06:09Safe from my father.
01:06:12Safe from all of it.
01:06:15You know, those days in Vegas...
01:06:20were the best three days of my life.
01:06:22All right, let's get this show started, okay?
01:06:24Whoa!
01:06:25Whoa!
01:06:25Whoa!
01:06:25Whoa!
01:06:25Whoa!
01:06:26Whoa!
01:06:27Whoa!
01:06:30Whoa!
01:06:30I love you, too.
01:06:32I love you.
01:06:33I love you.
01:06:35Eric.
01:06:38No!
01:06:42I love you.
01:07:00The Wand of Light has the power
01:07:03to grant its user their deepest desires.
01:07:11Please, please, please.
01:07:22Please, please.
01:07:25Please.
01:07:28Please.
01:07:29Please.
01:07:33Please.
01:07:35Please.
01:07:37You absolute horrible.
01:07:42You absolute moron.
01:07:44Be gentle. I was dead for like 10 seconds.
01:07:49You're alive.
01:07:51That is for divorcing me on your literal deathbed, you asshole.
01:07:56I thought I was doing something noble. Something cool.
01:07:59The wand gave you your power back?
01:08:03My mom used to say that the wands user grants it its deepest desire.
01:08:07I guess it knew what I really wanted.
01:08:11What did you want?
01:08:13You.
01:08:17Don't scare me like that again, okay?
01:08:20You know, I thought I heard something, but I was bleeding out.
01:08:29Maybe you could say it again?
01:08:35Maybe you could say it again?
01:08:39I love you, Eric's Vincent.
01:08:43That's my girl.
01:08:50Let's go.
01:09:03You ready for one last stop?
01:09:07Yeah.
01:09:25Ah, there you are.
01:09:30I knew I could always trust a demon to get the job done.
01:09:34Now, where is my wand?
01:09:38Wait.
01:09:39You're supposed to be dead.
01:09:41Wow.
01:09:42You weren't kidding.
01:09:43He really is evil.
01:09:45I put a barrier around this whole house.
01:09:47It's impossible.
01:09:48There's no way you should be able to be in here.
01:09:50There's always a loophole, old man.
01:09:55Secret.
01:09:56You ungrateful brat.
01:09:58How dare you betray me like this?
01:10:00Really, Dad?
01:10:01Playing the family card after you almost sold me into child marriage?
01:10:05You ungrateful little pests.
01:10:14You're powerless now, old man.
01:10:17Your magic's gone.
01:10:18Forever.
01:10:32Eric, Otis, Svensson, release me this instant.
01:10:36That is an order.
01:10:39You can handle it from here, right?
01:10:41His powers are gone.
01:10:42It doesn't scare me anymore.
01:10:46You ungrateful little brats.
01:10:47Both of you, you'll pay for this.
01:10:49You will both pay for this.
01:10:55Yeah, yeah.
01:10:56Talk soon, pups.
01:10:58We're going to hit the road.
01:10:58I said get back here.
01:11:00I said get back here.
01:11:02Get back here.
01:11:03Please don't do this, you little bitch.
01:11:21So, where to now?
01:11:24Should we go and drop off the wand of life?
01:11:27Yeah.
01:11:29But there's something I want to do first.
01:11:32That sounds ominous.
01:11:34Just so happens that there's another full moon tonight.
01:11:39Leona Sherwood, are you asking me to hand-fast marry you?
01:11:45Yeah.
01:11:47I think I am Eric Sponson.
01:11:50Well, we better hurry.
01:11:51If we're going to take the wand of light home and make it back in time to the hunk-a
01:11:55-hunk-a wedding chapel of love.
01:11:57I wonder if they have the same Elvis.
01:11:59I sure hope so.
01:12:01But, if we're going to get hand-fast married again, no more secrets this time.
01:12:06So, is there anything you want to come clean about now, soon-to-be-again husband?
01:12:13There is one thing.
01:12:16You might want to buckle up.
01:12:18We're about to go super speed.
01:12:20Bessie could have been going super speed this entire time.
01:12:24You didn't tell me to make our trip last longer, didn't you?
01:12:27You know me so well, soon-to-be-again wife.
01:12:33Leona Sherwood.
01:12:35Will you marry me?
01:12:36And not because of some spell or because it's your duty.
01:12:41But because you want to.
01:12:46Yes, I will.
01:12:57Ready?
01:12:58Hell yeah.
01:13:05Let's go.
01:13:06Let's go.
01:13:07Let's go.
01:13:09Let's go.
01:13:10Let's go.
01:13:10Let's go.
01:13:10Let's go.
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