- 5 hours ago
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FunTranscript
00:05We've got company.
00:11Party's over.
00:17Sorry.
00:19I had a guy.
00:23Party's over.
00:24I literally just said that.
00:25Yeah, and I thought it was cool.
00:38I'm drunk.
00:43Boy, he's still right there.
00:46Boy!
00:48Get the Jeep!
01:01Look out
01:05Get in
01:11It's not
01:15Come on
01:37Pull him in
01:38I'm trying, his body is all slippery
01:40Pull him in
01:42I just wanted the end
01:48They're getting closer
01:49I think I have a plan
01:50I think it just might be crazy enough to work
01:53I haven't set the plan yet
01:54Yeah, I'm just predicting that the plan is going to be good, but also crazy
01:58I guess thank you for having faith in the plan
02:00I would like to hear the plan before I share my opinion on the plan
02:03Grab that can of paint from the booth
02:05We're going to get this thing driving itself
02:22Plan was good
02:24The plan was good
02:26We'd better get moving though
02:27That car's going to crash out in this road
02:46Where's Isabelle?
02:48She's gone to Auckland
02:50Forever?
02:52No, no, just for four days
02:54Here we go
02:55Open the dossier
02:58Last night
02:59Sue snapped some documents
03:02And one name kept coming up
03:04Jim Marshall
03:05He's a politician
03:06Leader slash only member of the Unite Party
03:09Tomorrow morning on the 10.30 train from Wellington to Auckland
03:12Jim Marshall is planning to meet Dennis Green
03:14Next photo
03:15As we know
03:16Dennis is the head of the AIS
03:17Which stands for?
03:19Australian
03:19The A stands for Australian
03:22Australian
03:22Australian Intelligence Service
03:24Nice one, Sue
03:25Jim
03:26Is a trader
03:28He's agreed to sell Dennis
03:30Classified New Zealand documents
03:31Those documents are classified
03:33We need to find out what those documents are
03:39Whoa
03:41Awesome
03:42Yeah
03:43Why was it under the sheet?
03:44Just a little bit of showmanship
03:45I really like it
03:47Now
03:47There are six characters on the train
03:49Jim Marshall
03:50Is travelling at the front of the train
03:51In carriage one
03:53Dennis Green
03:54Is travelling at the back of the train
03:54Carriage six
03:55At midday
03:56They plan to meet in the dining car
03:58Carriage four
03:59You will be travelling in carriage three
04:01Upon departure
04:02You will convert the carriage
04:04Into a fake dining carriage
04:06At midday
04:07Dennis Green will move through
04:09To the real dining car
04:10At the same time
04:11Jim Marshall
04:13Will come back
04:13And hit carriage three
04:15And think it's the real dining carriage
04:17Exactly
04:17Where Anderson
04:19You will be waiting
04:20Pretending to be Dennis Green
04:21And you'll insert the documents
04:22From Jim Marshall
04:24Simultaneously
04:24Michael
04:25You'll be disguised as Jim Marshall
04:27You'll make your way back
04:28To the real dining car
04:29Meet the real Dennis Green
04:31And give him fake documents
04:33And what am I doing?
04:34You will be the waiter
04:35In the fake dining carriage
04:41No
04:42No
04:43I do not accept
04:44What?
04:45What do you mean what?
04:46I always get the worst freaking jobs
04:48Oh here we go
04:49In Queenstown
04:50I was stuck in a freaking car
04:51All day
04:52While these two were freaking skiing
04:54That's like so fun
04:56What's fun?
04:57In Christchurch
04:57I was just a straight up chef
04:59Cooking spaghetti all day
05:00While these two are freaking
05:02Winning medals and all that
05:04Bronze
05:04And now you're telling me
05:05These two Muppets
05:06Get to play high ranking diplomats
05:09Doing actual espionage
05:10While I'm a freaking waitress
05:12No
05:13I do not accept
05:16No
05:19I'll go and talk to her
05:20You stay here
05:21Do not touch the train
05:23Help yourself to a pistachio
05:25You don't eat the shell Michael
05:35Maybe you can have a bit of fun
05:36With the character
05:37The backstory
05:39The complex characterisation
05:43The thing is
05:45They both kind of need to be men
05:46Because Jim and Dennis are both men
05:49So if you show up as Dennis
05:51Or Denise
05:52Jim's going to be suspicious
05:59Please
06:02Fine
06:04But just so you know
06:06I am going to have a lot of fun
06:08With this character
06:08Okay
06:10Accent
06:11French
06:12Okay
06:13Personality
06:14Crazy
06:15Not a problem
06:16She'll also have a very nice hat
06:19Okay
06:20We'll get you a hat
06:21A nice one though
06:22Even I will get you a really
06:23Nice hat
06:26Okay I'm in
06:31What the hell
06:32You ate all the pistachios
06:35You said we could
06:36I said eat a pistachio Anderson
06:38One pistachio
06:40Those are imported from Iran
06:42They were really Moorish
06:43I was gone for two minutes
06:44How did you even eat that many pistachios in two minutes
06:47I love pistachios
06:49Should we just get back to the mission
06:50Um
06:52Yes
06:53Intercepting the documents
06:55There is one problem with the plan
06:57We tried to book all the seats in carriage three
06:59The fake dining carriage
07:00But three of them had already been booked
07:02By who?
07:04What?
07:05Okay if you're not going to go
07:06We're going to need you to cooperate with us
07:08We're spies
07:09We're not supposed to say that
07:10These are not our regular clothes
07:12Shut up Michael
07:13But spies?
07:14You're not real spies
07:15Are you real spies?
07:17Not so much acts
07:18We're going to need you to play along
07:20With something
07:21Performance
07:22A performance?
07:23Yes
07:24Oh
07:24In 80 minutes
07:25A man will enter this carriage
07:27When he opens the door
07:30It's showtime
07:31Oh
07:32Okay
07:34Okay
07:39Toujours pressé
07:40J'avais fatigué
07:42Tu cours partout
07:43T'as mis le rendezvous
07:45Entre nous
07:46Moi je te préfère
07:47Immobile
07:48Plus d'estile
07:49Enfant c'est tout
07:51Ne bouge pas
07:53Regarde-moi
07:54Et qu'est-ce que tu es beau comme ça
07:57Oh yeah
07:57Ne bouge pas
07:59Rest avec moi
08:01Ne faites pas les yeux pour une fois
08:05Rest avec moi
08:06Ne faites pas les yeux pour une fois
08:11You ready?
08:12You've not given us any lines
08:14You don't have to say anything
08:15Just be yourself and act natural
08:17I take acting classes
08:18That's perfect
08:19We're not doing it unless we get lines
08:21Yeah, and motivation
08:22Like, what's my motivation?
08:23No way
08:24I'm with them
08:24What?
08:25As someone who is overlooked
08:26And is playing a waiter
08:27I think they should get lines
08:28Huh?
08:29Yeah
08:29I perform better with catering
08:31Jesus Christ
08:32You have cheese and crackers right there
08:34The hot food
08:35I think we need hot food
08:36Yeah, we need hot food
08:40You have cheese and crackers
08:41You have cheese and crackers
08:42Come here
08:43VoilÃ
08:48I'm just Among Wins
08:53Let's go.
09:23It's a dog-eat-dog world.
09:26It's a dog-eat-dog world.
09:28It's dog-eat-dog.
09:30It's dog-eat-dog.
09:33Yeah, that's what I said.
09:34That's what I said.
09:36Do you sound like you said dog-eat-dog?
09:37It sounded like you said dog-eat-dog.
09:39Well, I didn't.
09:40Well, I didn't.
09:42Okay, well, maybe start again.
09:45Okay, it's a dog-eat-dog world.
09:48It's a dog-eat-dog world.
09:52Luckily, I like the taste of dog.
09:54Luckily, I like the taste of dog.
09:57Good.
09:58Jim Marshall.
09:59Jim Marshall.
10:00Dennis Green.
10:03Bonjour, messieurs.
10:04Welcome to the, um, how you say, uh, restaurant.
10:10Have you dined with us before?
10:12No, no.
10:13First time?
10:14Well, that is fine.
10:16Do not worry, because all the meals are written out on this, um, here, uh, how you say, an English
10:22paper.
10:23Menu's a French word.
10:24Mm, mm.
10:25Um, what would you recommend?
10:28Fantastic question.
10:30Um, I personally love the, that one.
10:36The side salad.
10:38Well, oh, I love the side salad.
10:40I think we'll get the steak.
10:41Rare.
10:42Fantastic choice, sir.
10:44Uh, for you?
10:45I'll have the chicken parmigiana.
10:47Chicken?
10:48And would you like that rare as well?
10:50Won't rare chicken make me sick?
10:52It 100% will.
10:53Why would you want it rare, then?
10:56I am from French, and so I, my English is not so good, so I will now, I say, take
11:03those orders to the kitchen and put your orders in, so au revoir, thank you.
11:10I highly recommend the leg of lamb.
11:13We've already ordered.
11:21You don't do milkshakes, do you?
11:23Ah, no, sorry.
11:24That's okay.
11:25Tap water is fine.
11:27Okay, so that's one lobster risotto with a glass of red wine, and one oodles of noodles with tap water.
11:32But an adult-sized oodles of noodles.
11:34Yes, an adult-sized oodles of noodles.
11:36Correct.
11:40You're younger than I was expecting.
11:42You're looking good as well.
11:44You bring the documents?
11:46Mm-hmm.
11:47Big time.
11:48You bring the money?
11:49$35,000.
11:50That's all it takes for a man to betray his country.
11:53That's a lot of money.
12:01This train is weird.
12:07So that's one steak rare and one chicken parmigiano.
12:10Well done.
12:10Well done to you as well for getting my order right.
12:13Okay, buddy.
12:13Good luck, son.
12:14I appreciate it.
12:15I appreciate it.
12:23What?
12:24Bonjour!
12:25It is I here with a muse.
12:28Danny?
12:29What's wrong with him?
12:30Oh, my God.
12:31It's okay.
12:32He's panicking.
12:33He's panicking because you told him he was a spy!
12:37I did not.
12:38I did not do this.
12:39Okay, we're going to move through there, I reckon.
12:40Stop, stop, you must stay seated.
12:42I like it in here.
12:44There's a bit of ambience.
12:50Australia, thank you.
12:51Do I mention it, Australia?
12:54See you tonight.
12:55Absolutely.
12:56Wait, what is happening tonight?
12:58Party that the Australian Beef Board is throwing.
13:01You RSVP.
13:01I can't wait for the party tonight.
13:06Stay seated, please.
13:07No, this is crazy in here.
13:09We're going to move.
13:09I cannot let you do this!
13:11I cannot let you do this!
13:12Move.
13:13Do not be rude!
13:14Oh, my God.
13:15This man is violent!
13:26I said do not be rude.
13:42It's boring as hell out here.
13:44I just looked at the top-secret documents we intercepted, and it's just a list of every farm in New
13:49Zealand.
13:53How's Jim?
13:55I'm still out cold.
13:56Good.
13:57Don't let him out of your sight.
14:06Michael, you need to track down Dennis Green and find out what he wants for those documents.
14:10Magnus is here.
14:12He knows what I look like.
14:13I told you you should have worn those glasses.
14:15Yeah, well, they hurt my eyes, and they made me look like that politician.
14:18That's the point, Michael.
14:20Find Dennis Green, say hi, and let's get out of here.
14:23We'll keep a lookout for Magnus.
14:26Okay, Dennis Green, where are you?
14:31Oh.
14:34Great party, huh?
14:36You can say that again.
14:38Great party, huh?
14:42Yeah.
14:43Can you hear me?
14:44Yes, I can hear you.
14:45I'm responding.
14:47Oh.
14:48Yeah, I'm...
14:48I'm, uh...
14:50Jim Marshall.
14:51I'm a politician.
14:53Nice to meet you.
14:54I'm Robert.
14:56Do you live in Auckland?
14:58Yes, but I am from Uganda.
15:00We came here two years ago as refugees.
15:03Oh, wow.
15:04Dad?
15:05These two men are from the group I was telling you about.
15:08The Dorian Society, New Zealand's first organisation for gay men.
15:11Oh, I see.
15:13Very medical.
15:15Who's your friend?
15:16Name's Jim Marshall.
15:17The politician?
15:18The very same.
15:19Wow.
15:20You know my work.
15:22Of course I do.
15:23You campaigned to stop New Zealand from accepting refugees with disabilities.
15:30Did I?
15:31Yeah.
15:34Sorry.
15:36You also killed the Crimes Amendments Bill, which would have legalised being gay.
15:41What the hell, man?
15:42What's your problem?
15:44I...
15:44I just...
15:45You just what?
15:47I guess I just...
15:48don't like...
15:49Yeah?
15:52People who are different to me.
15:54Like who?
15:55Specifically.
15:59Gay people and disabled refugees.
16:02Whoa.
16:02Oh, my goodness.
16:03Oh, my goodness.
16:04You are a piece of shit.
16:06Get me away from this scumbag piece of shit.
16:15Michael?
16:18Isabelle.
16:19I'm undercover.
16:20My name is Jim Marshall.
16:21Oh, sorry.
16:24Hi, Jim Marshall.
16:26What are you doing here?
16:28Uh, my boyfriend got an invite.
16:31Oh.
16:32Sorry if it's not appropriate, but I thought you guys had broken up.
16:36We had, but then I apologised about the whole shoes-in-the-bed thing, and now we're back together.
16:42He sounds amazing.
16:44Where is this incredible guy?
16:46Uh, that's him over there.
16:49I'm not getting it until you get in.
16:51Okay?
16:52It's warm.
16:53It's good.
16:55Isabelle!
16:57I see you.
16:58He looks awesome.
17:00He's drunk.
17:01Get in here!
17:03I should probably go get him out of the fountain.
17:06Well, a pleasure to see you, Mr. Jim Marshall.
17:09You too, Mr. Jim Marshall.
17:13You're Jim Marshall.
17:14Oh, yeah.
17:16I'm Isabelle.
17:17Sorry.
17:18From the office.
17:19I remember.
17:20See ya.
17:21Bye.
17:21Bye.
17:29Michael.
17:31I found Dennis Green.
17:32Find out what his plan is.
17:44Oh, uh, crap.
17:48Sue, we may have a problem.
18:01Jimmy boy.
18:04Dennis boy.
18:06Glad you could make it.
18:07Of course.
18:10What do you mean you're just him?
18:12Well, he can't have gone far.
18:15Probably.
18:17Jim?
18:19Jim?
18:22Jim!
18:23You really helped the cause today.
18:25And if I may be so bold, what is the cause?
18:29You're on the right side.
18:30That's all you need to know.
18:32Really?
18:32New Zealand is dying, and a golden dawn is coming.
18:37A green and golden dawn.
18:42Can we help you?
18:44My name is Jim.
18:48Why'd you do that?
18:49He was weird, and you had me on edge by talking all scary.
18:54I'm going to go now, but it's great seeing you again.
19:01Jim?
19:02Where are you, mate?
19:04Oh, my gosh.
19:05Wow.
19:06You really scared me.
19:09Oh.
19:10Oh.
19:11Wow.
19:12That was crazy.
19:13What are you doing here?
19:15Why are you...
19:27Oh.
19:28Oh.
19:29Sorry.
19:31Hi, Jim Marshall.
19:33What's wrong?
19:35Ricky broke up with me again.
19:38And this time it's forever, I think.
19:40Oh, no.
19:41I'm so sorry.
19:42I know.
19:44There's plenty more fish in the sea.
19:46No, I wasn't going to say that.
19:49There are plenty more fish in the sea, but every fish is different, and you like that fish.
19:54Do you have a tissue?
19:56No, but you could use my bow tie.
19:59Oh, it's okay.
20:02Here.
20:04Thank you, Michael.
20:06You're a good fish.
20:09Hey.
20:13Are you the guy who hates gay people and disabled refugees?
20:18Yes.
20:19What?
20:20See?
20:20You've got ten seconds to get out of here before we kick your ass.
20:23Ten.
20:24Okay, I might have to go now, but please know that I don't hate gay people or disabled refugees.
20:29But you just said that you do.
20:30I don't have time to explain, but you were one of the most wonderful and most beautiful fishes in the
20:35whole ocean,
20:36and anyone would be so unbelievably lucky to catch you on a hook or in their neck.
20:40Okay.
20:41Get it.
20:41I got going.
20:49Something good will come my way, and maybe this good thing's gonna happen today.
20:58If I were honest, I'd tell you everything, but it keeps coming out as lies.
21:09It's not a promise, but it's not a promise, but it's not a promise.
21:13In case you're wondering, it's not some blessing in disguise.
21:20Something good will come my way, and maybe this good thing's gonna happen today.
21:31Something good will come my way.
21:36Something good will come my way.
21:41Something good will come my way, and maybe this good thing will come my way, and maybe this good thing
21:41will come my way, and maybe this good thing will come my way, and maybe this good thing will come
21:47my way, and maybe this good thing will come my way, and maybe this good thing will come my way,
21:48and maybe this good thing will come my way, and maybe this good thing will come my way, and maybe
21:49this good thing will come my way, and maybe this good thing will come my way, and maybe this good
21:50thing will come my way, and maybe this good thing will come my way, and maybe this good thing will
21:51come my way, and maybe this good thing will come my way, and maybe this good thing will come my
21:55way, and maybe this good thing will come my way, and maybe this good thing will come my way, and
21:55maybe this good thing will come my way, and maybe this good thing will come my way, and maybe this
21:55good thing will come my way, and maybe this good thing will come my way, and maybe this good
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