- 2 days ago
A man (Arye Gross) and his friend (Jonathan Stark) exhume an ancestor (Royal Dano) in the house where his parents were killed.
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:10To be continued...
00:01:39Larry, they're waiting.
00:01:41I'm coming.
00:01:42I'm coming.
00:01:42I'm coming.
00:02:36I'm coming.
00:02:39I'm coming.
00:02:54I'm coming.
00:03:18I'm coming.
00:03:23I'm coming.
00:03:24I'm coming.
00:03:45I'm coming.
00:03:51I'm coming.
00:03:52I'm coming.
00:04:18I'm coming.
00:04:45I'm coming.
00:04:56I'm coming.
00:05:06I'm coming.
00:05:19I'm coming.
00:05:21I'm coming.
00:05:38I'm coming.
00:05:44I'm coming.
00:05:47I'm coming.
00:05:51I'm coming.
00:06:18I'm coming.
00:06:21I'm coming.
00:06:22I'm coming.
00:06:22I'm coming.
00:06:31I'm coming.
00:06:32I'm coming.
00:06:34I'm coming.
00:06:53I'm coming.
00:06:59I'm coming.
00:07:01I'm coming.
00:07:11I'm coming.
00:07:25I'm coming.
00:07:29I'm coming.
00:07:30I'm coming.
00:07:34I'm coming.
00:07:34I'm coming.
00:07:35I'm coming.
00:07:36I'm coming.
00:07:37That was my grandfather.
00:07:42So he must have been my great-great-grandfather.
00:07:48Jesse McLaughlin. They named me after him.
00:08:34To be continued...
00:08:45To be continued...
00:09:14What on earth were you doing?
00:09:17I couldn't sleep, so I went downstairs to just look around.
00:09:28What is that?
00:09:37But I don't do it.
00:09:44Oh, my God.
00:09:47Wait!
00:09:54Happy birthday to you!
00:09:59Happy birthday to you!
00:10:03Oh, hey, you didn't have to do this.
00:10:07Sure I did.
00:10:08You're the only person I know who's ever been famous, huh?
00:10:11Hardly famous, Charlie.
00:10:12Nobody reads this magazine.
00:10:14Oh, well, you know, I mean, I have to admit, I don't look at the pictures.
00:10:19I only read it for the interviews.
00:10:24Hey, look at this cow.
00:10:26It's nice and comfortable.
00:10:27I'm better.
00:10:28Huh?
00:10:29Oh, well, now, I'm better off.
00:10:39Oh, right, wait, wait.
00:10:41Yeah.
00:10:41Oh, perfect.
00:10:42Here.
00:10:43Yeah, yeah.
00:10:44Yeah.
00:10:57Can you hold on for just a second?
00:11:23Oh, hi, Kate. Hey, music too loud, man, in the body, really.
00:11:29What, what, what is this your playing?
00:11:32That's Puse Glitz and the Avoiders.
00:11:34Puse Glitz?
00:11:35Yeah, that's my stage name.
00:11:37This is you?
00:11:38Uh, yeah, and, uh, her manager.
00:11:41Uh, Kate, I don't feel compelled to tell you, we are weighing several offers from some big producers, but to
00:11:48drop names would be tacky.
00:11:50But you don't have a contract yet. I mean, you haven't signed anything yet, have you?
00:11:54Oh, no, we don't believe in success.
00:11:57Yeah, we want to make a lot of money and be real famous, but, but no success.
00:12:00No, there's a very subtle difference, you know.
00:12:05John, I've got to get back to you. I think I may have found what we're looking for.
00:12:09All right. Sweet sensation.
00:12:12Ow!
00:12:13Sweet vibration.
00:12:15Oh, my gosh.
00:12:35Hmm.
00:12:37They're different.
00:12:42this one's got jewels in its eyes
00:12:52they're not the same skull
00:12:55hey Jeff what you doing there huh
00:12:58come on Charlie give it it's uh private
00:13:00hey this is cool looks like it's old what is it
00:13:02come on Charlie give it
00:13:03no no no not until you tell me what it is
00:13:05it's nothing
00:13:09promise you won't laugh
00:13:11yeah
00:13:14sure I will here okay here take it
00:13:19see this guy it's my great great
00:13:21grandfather
00:13:22he has the same name as me he was an
00:13:25outlaw in the old west
00:13:27yeah look at the skull he's holding
00:13:29it's made completely out of raw crystal
00:13:33and this guy in the background this is
00:13:35jesse's partner slim raiser
00:13:36no now he and jesse had a falling out of
00:13:40the skull and became bitter enemies
00:13:43swim died without ever getting the skull
00:13:45from jesse
00:13:46all right now look at this see this
00:13:49skull right now it's different from the
00:13:51one here in the book right i mean this one
00:13:53has got jewels in the eyes wait wait a minute
00:13:55go ahead listen to this okay um all right
00:14:00legend has it that there was a second skull that had untold powers that could unlock the mysteries
00:14:04of the universe and bring eternal life to those who possessed it so
00:14:08question is if this is the legendary second skull
00:14:16where is it
00:14:21why asking me i mean how am i supposed to know
00:14:25charlie charlie um there's an old cemetery up on the hill
00:14:30jesse was buried there in 1916
00:14:33now look here it says that when the aztecs buried their dead
00:14:38they wrapped the bodies in several layers of cloth
00:14:40and they surrounded them with their weapons and jewels
00:14:45it was worth millions was it a lot yeah
00:14:53i say let's go for it
00:15:05there's nothing down here
00:15:08let's quit i don't care if all the money in the world is down here
00:15:13i just want some sleep i'm really tired
00:15:27charlie
00:15:28huh
00:15:29you got it
00:15:31oh no
00:15:40you got charlie
00:15:49for him
00:15:52torever
00:15:53a
00:15:54you got it
00:15:54you got it
00:15:55you got it
00:16:13Oh, my God.
00:16:38Jarny!
00:16:42Just...
00:16:42Just...
00:16:43Come on.
00:16:45I don't have time for this.
00:16:47Just in there.
00:16:48Jarny!
00:17:08Don't be, you idiot.
00:17:11Jesse!
00:17:22Come on, look up!
00:17:29Jesse!
00:17:34It's me!
00:17:36I'm your great-great-grandson.
00:17:39They named me after you.
00:17:41My name is Jesse, too.
00:17:57My great-great-grandson?
00:18:04What year is it?
00:18:07I don't know.
00:18:09Now, don't you mess with me, boy.
00:18:121986!
00:18:13October 30th!
00:18:151986!
00:18:19Well...
00:18:20Oh, damn.
00:18:21You know, I've been waiting over 70 years
00:18:24for some jackass to get the sense to come dig me up.
00:18:28Thank you, boy.
00:18:43Well...
00:18:44There she is.
00:18:47There's something special about this old house.
00:18:50Can't you feel it?
00:18:51I can't.
00:18:59Come on.
00:19:03Let's go this way.
00:19:13Where are you going?
00:19:19There.
00:19:34Remember, boys.
00:19:36This house is a temple.
00:19:39As fantastic as any pyramid or castle you'll ever see.
00:19:45You don't know time or space or any of that hogwash.
00:19:48But the forces of evil are always after this, Gull,
00:19:52and you've got to help me to protect it.
00:19:54So don't let no one touch the dang thing, you hear?
00:20:11You can sleep on this.
00:20:14Is this the way you treat family?
00:20:17Making them hide down in the basement like some slimy old lizard?
00:20:22Well, I'm sorry.
00:20:24I must be out of practice.
00:20:25I don't have any family, sir.
00:20:27Don't call me sir.
00:20:28I ain't no politician.
00:20:31Heck, I'm your great-great-grandfather.
00:20:35You can call me Gramps.
00:20:38That's what your granddaddy used to call me.
00:20:41All right.
00:20:43Gramps.
00:20:47Well, uh, we better hit the hay.
00:20:51But I'm not tired.
00:20:54I don't need no sleep.
00:20:56Well, let's get me cleaned up,
00:20:58and then we can go out on the town and do a little high-stepping.
00:21:03I don't know if that's such a good idea.
00:21:06Why not?
00:21:07There's nothing wrong with me.
00:21:09No, there's nothing wrong with you, but...
00:21:13Yeah, well, something's bothering you.
00:21:15I can see it in your eyes.
00:21:18Look, I'm just as fit as a fiddle.
00:21:21Well, I'm...
00:21:29Oh, no.
00:21:31Oh, no.
00:21:33I...
00:21:34I'm supposed to be young again.
00:21:41Gramps, I've maybe should...
00:21:43Look at me.
00:21:50I'm a hundred and seventy-year-old fart.
00:21:56A goddamn zombie.
00:22:01Well, um, you look really good for a hundred and seventy-year-old zombie.
00:22:04Gramps, really great.
00:22:09Well, I ain't gonna die if it's the last thing I do.
00:22:13I'm like, oh, my God.
00:22:20I'm like, oh, my God.
00:22:26I'm like, oh, my God.
00:22:41Let's go.
00:23:06What in tarnation is it, Gramps?
00:23:10This is a 1986 Alfa Romeo spider.
00:23:17Zero to sixty, seven point three seconds.
00:23:41Let it out slow! There you go, real slow!
00:23:48Are we...
00:23:51Yee-haw!
00:24:04Look at them stars.
00:24:06Woo!
00:24:07You know, they were clearer back in the old days.
00:24:13And sometimes it was so bright, you couldn't get to sleep.
00:24:20Wait, no Gramps!
00:24:22It's the ozone!
00:24:23I mean...
00:24:24I mean, you know, insect repellence, you know...
00:24:29Under-armed reodorants, maybe just a pinch of communism.
00:24:33It's making the stars fade away.
00:24:35You're drunk!
00:24:37You're drunk!
00:24:38Oh, hee-haw!
00:24:46Oh, hee-haw!
00:24:50Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
00:24:52Wow!
00:24:53Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
00:24:54Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
00:24:54I better drive!
00:24:56Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
00:25:07Oh, my God.
00:25:27Are you sorry?
00:25:58Who's your friend?
00:25:59Bozo the Clown?
00:26:00No.
00:26:01Bozo the Death Machine.
00:26:03Uh, Charlie, Charlie, this is John Statman, Kate's boss.
00:26:06He's the president of Heretic Records.
00:26:12Okay.
00:26:14Okay.
00:26:15Okay.
00:26:16Okay.
00:26:16Okay.
00:26:16John Statman.
00:26:17Of course.
00:26:18This is really a pleasure.
00:26:20I'm really happy to meet you.
00:26:21Charlie Correale, manager of Puse Glitz and the avoidance.
00:26:24Kate!
00:26:25Ta-da!
00:26:26Here she is.
00:26:27Great.
00:26:28You have the tape?
00:26:29Where are you going?
00:26:29We're doing lunch.
00:26:30John made a special trip out here to meet Lana and listen to her demo tape.
00:26:37See you later, Jessie.
00:26:43It's great.
00:26:45You just keep coming, and coming and coming.
00:26:50Where the hell are they all coming from anyhow?
00:26:55I broke it.
00:27:00Gramps, thanks. I hate this doggone box. Got all them channels and got nothing interesting
00:27:10to watch. Well, there I was, right out in the middle of Kansas, facing 500 crazy fanatics
00:27:15heavily armed, and me with only 15 soldiers. Now, you take this Ronald Reagan, fella. He
00:27:21sure is a pansy. He wouldn't have lasted 10 minutes back in the old days. My dear young
00:27:28lady, there comes a time in every soldier's life when he must stand or fall alone. And
00:27:32if you knew the army, you'd understand that he... It wouldn't do no good to tell you how
00:27:36it was. You had to be there. And all them movies and books and crap, they don't tell you how
00:27:42it really was. He was rough. I got a question for you. Whatever happened to Slim Reeser?
00:27:52Slim Reeser ain't part of my vocabulary no more, son. We had a disagreement about who the
00:28:02skull belonged to. What did you do? I shot the scallywag, is what I did. Well, he took a shot
00:28:12at me first, so I had to teach him a lesson. And I left him to die in the Mojave
00:28:17Desert.
00:28:19And that was that? Yeah, that was that.
00:28:25Uh, uh, Gramps, did you ever rob a stagecoach? Sure. Right. All the time. I robbed a stagecoach
00:28:38once just outside of Dodge City. Now, every day at about 530, it used to come into the bank
00:28:45with a bag of money that would give an elephant a hernia. We set up on both sides of a
00:28:52little
00:28:52gorge just outside of town. And when the stagecoach come on through, we had one. And they chased
00:28:59me around them hills and clean across the border into Arizona territory. Well, I was a-riding
00:29:07for about two weeks without ever getting out of the saddle and trying to lose it, fellas.
00:29:13I was hoping the wolf would just do it. And a wind shatter. And all of a sudden, I'd take
00:29:19an arrow right through the lake. Right there. Right. And another one just under the shoulder.
00:29:24Right there. The caves were never uncovered again. And there must have been a billion dollars
00:29:32in diamonds and jewels down there. Now that's something I intend to search for just as soon
00:29:40as I get rejuvenated. What? I hear something. Yeah, it sounds like music. What time is it?
00:29:57Bring back some more beer.
00:30:15Hey, Frank, how's it going?
00:30:24I invited some people over for Halloween. I forgot. Sorry. Enjoy. Hey, get over here.
00:30:47I got over here.
00:30:49I got over here.
00:30:53I got over here. I got over here.
00:30:56Guess who?
00:31:00Michelle.
00:31:02Long time no see.
00:31:04We're going out of here.
00:31:05Oh, no.
00:31:08Oh, no.
00:31:08Yeah, I got over here.
00:31:20Yeah, it sure is.
00:31:24Excuse me.
00:31:28Hey, you're good.
00:31:30How long you out here for?
00:31:33Like a week.
00:31:48Would you hold this trash for a minute?
00:31:49Sure.
00:31:50You look great.
00:31:54Now, I know some people down in Hollywood.
00:31:57Charlie, Charlie.
00:31:59What?
00:31:59Look, Gramps.
00:32:01What's he doing?
00:32:03He looks like he's about to score.
00:32:05Yeah, but how did he get up here?
00:32:07Well, he relax.
00:32:08It's Halloween.
00:32:09He blends right in.
00:32:11All right, Gramps.
00:32:12Go for it, pal.
00:32:18Hey, excuse me, Lee.
00:32:19Hey, Susan!
00:32:22Isn't he great?
00:32:24Yeah, he's an old friend.
00:32:26From way back.
00:33:12Hey, watch it.
00:33:14Come on.
00:33:15Come on.
00:33:16Come on.
00:33:44Jesse?
00:33:45What?
00:33:46Can I talk to you?
00:33:48Go ahead.
00:33:51Out and back?
00:33:53Sure.
00:33:55I'll meet you there.
00:33:56Okie dokie.
00:34:05Hey.
00:34:19You better pack your ass in a suitcase and head for Panama.
00:34:25You jerk!
00:34:31I knew it for sure!
00:34:32Hey!
00:34:33Oh no!
00:34:34Don't be me!
00:34:34Look at these!
00:34:35No!
00:34:36Please!
00:34:36No!
00:34:37No!
00:34:37No!
00:34:39No!
00:34:44No!
00:34:48No!
00:34:49No!
00:34:51No!
00:34:52B
00:34:53No!
00:34:54No!
00:34:55Oh no!
00:34:56Oh, my God.
00:35:26Charlie, there's a jungle in there.
00:35:30Get you something, dear?
00:35:31Valium! Get me Valium!
00:35:37Whiskey.
00:35:38Get me whiskey.
00:35:47I need the skull.
00:35:49Without it, I'm a goner, for sure.
00:35:52Don't let him get away.
00:35:54Gramps, there's a jungle upstairs.
00:35:57He took it in there.
00:35:59He's from the Stone Age, kid.
00:36:01You gotta stop him.
00:36:03Don't worry, he's a pushover.
00:36:05Gramps, I don't think you understand.
00:36:07There is a jungle!
00:36:09Jesse, in the wrong hands,
00:36:11that skull could cause trouble.
00:36:13Now go!
00:36:23Charlie!
00:36:39Charlie!
00:36:40Charlie!
00:36:42Charlie, don't sneak up behind me like that.
00:36:45Well, I just happened to have this in the trunk of the car.
00:36:47You never know when you're gonna need one in a pinch, huh?
00:36:50What is it?
00:36:51This is an Uzi semi-automatic firing weapon.
00:36:54Charlie, this is a machine gun!
00:36:57So?
00:36:58So?
00:37:01So, what about me? What do I get?
00:37:04I only had the one Uzi, you know.
00:37:06But, uh...
00:37:09I got one of these.
00:37:14What do I do with this? Light cigars?
00:37:17No, you shoot people with it.
00:37:19Duh.
00:37:19Oh.
00:37:22Okay.
00:37:24On the count of three,
00:37:26you're gonna kick the door open,
00:37:27run in there blindly,
00:37:29and I'll cover you, okay?
00:37:31The guy with the big gun goes first.
00:37:35Okay.
00:37:39Ready?
00:37:40Yeah.
00:37:42One.
00:37:44Two.
00:37:45Hold on.
00:37:45Hold on.
00:37:49One.
00:37:52Two.
00:37:54Three.
00:37:56Yeah!
00:37:58You're gonna throw!
00:37:59You're gonna throw!
00:38:04That's to me!
00:38:08Ah!
00:38:09You're gonna throw!
00:38:10Oh!
00:38:12Ha!
00:38:12Ah!
00:38:13Oh!
00:38:13Oh!
00:38:15Oh!
00:38:16Oh!
00:38:16Oh!
00:38:17Oh!
00:38:54Oh, what are you doing?
00:38:57Making sure you're not dreaming.
00:39:24Charlie.
00:39:30Nobody's home.
00:39:31What do we do?
00:39:32We need a plan.
00:39:35Yeah, let's get the skull and get the hell out of here.
00:39:38Good plan.
00:40:08Thanks, Charlie.
00:40:14Should I please?
00:40:25Take your best, Charlie.
00:40:26Oh, my God.
00:40:40Oh, my God.
00:40:41Oh, my God.
00:40:50Oh, my God.
00:41:07You coward!
00:41:10Come back and fight like a man!
00:41:33Where'd he go?
00:41:34He ran away with his tail between his legs, Jake and Jake, barbarian!
00:41:38Charlie, we're good.
00:41:39All right!
00:41:41The skull is right!
00:41:44Oh no, oh no.
00:41:51Come back!
00:41:52Hey, Jess!
00:41:54Hold open!
00:42:09It's this one.
00:42:25Come on, hurry up.
00:42:32Jess, don't worry.
00:42:33If you fall, you'll die real fast.
00:42:36Thanks, Charlie!
00:42:42Come on, Charlie!
00:42:48Come on, Charlie!
00:43:01Come on, Charlie!
00:43:07Come on, Charlie!
00:43:09Come on, Charlie!
00:43:16Come on, Charlie!
00:43:28Come on, Charlie!
00:43:32You're doing great, Jess!
00:43:35Keep going!
00:43:35Come on, Charlie!
00:43:36Ow!
00:43:38What an idiot.
00:43:48To the outside!
00:43:52No!
00:43:54Okay!
00:43:55What an idiot!
00:43:57I don't know!
00:44:01What an idiot!
00:44:01You won't know!
00:44:04No!
00:44:16Hey, Jess, looking good. Wish I had a camera.
00:44:32Okay. Nice bird. Nice birdie. Jeez.
00:44:54All right.
00:44:56Come on, Jess.
00:45:09I'm going.
00:45:24Jess, I'm going.
00:45:26I'm going.
00:45:26Yes.
00:45:29Get out of here. Come on.
00:45:31I'm going.
00:45:36I'm going.
00:45:36I'm going.
00:45:38No.
00:45:41No.
00:45:43No.
00:45:44No.
00:45:44No.
00:45:44No.
00:45:44No.
00:45:49I got you, Jess.
00:46:03What the hell was that?
00:46:05It sounded like a bomb.
00:46:09Why didn't you use the stairs?
00:46:13Charlie.
00:46:16Charlie, you all right?
00:46:27I guess...
00:46:28I guess...
00:46:29I guess...
00:46:33Jess, get him off me. He's eaten my leg!
00:46:35He's eaten my leg!
00:46:37Get up!
00:46:38Jess!
00:46:39He's eaten me alive!
00:46:41Oh!
00:46:46Oh!
00:46:46Oh!
00:46:47Oh!
00:46:48Oh!
00:46:48Oh!
00:46:49Oh!
00:46:49Oh!
00:46:51Charlie!
00:46:53Charlie!
00:46:55Charlie!
00:46:58Charlie!
00:47:01Hey!
00:47:02Hey!
00:47:04Hey, Jess.
00:47:05Can we keep him?
00:47:07Well, who's going to take care of him, Charlie?
00:47:09I'll feed him some of his water and stuff.
00:47:14Charlie!
00:47:14Help me!
00:47:17Charlie!
00:47:18Help me!
00:47:21Don't forget the beer!
00:47:23I could keep him alive!
00:47:39Come on!
00:47:42Come on!
00:47:44Come on!
00:48:07Hey, uh, Jesse?
00:48:09Damn!
00:48:14Carly, hi!
00:48:15Hi, John.
00:48:17Come on, give it back.
00:48:29There's nothing to worry about.
00:48:31We heard a noise.
00:48:33Noise?
00:48:35Oh, oh, oh, the really loud crashing noise.
00:48:40Yeah, nobody liked that one.
00:48:47It's my school.
00:48:47Come on, pal, it's my school.
00:48:50Where's the kitchen?
00:48:51Yeah.
00:48:51Look, we just want to know everything's okay.
00:48:54Couldn't be okay.
00:48:55Oh, really?
00:48:56Good.
00:48:56Nice.
00:48:57Nice.
00:49:03I know.
00:49:09Listen, I wanted to tell you before the evening got away, you are a funny, funny guy.
00:49:16And I mean, that is the hardest commodity to find in our business, really.
00:49:19Look at this shirt.
00:49:20Is this great?
00:49:20Is this the bananas?
00:49:22Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:49:24Sit down.
00:49:27Well, where's your beer?
00:49:28What are you doing out here?
00:49:30Quick!
00:49:30Somebody's coming.
00:49:31They go all the way around the back.
00:49:33They do.
00:49:36Hi, John.
00:49:39Hi, buddy.
00:49:40What's cooking in the kitchen?
00:49:42Nothing.
00:49:42No?
00:49:43And what might be in that closet there?
00:49:45Nothing.
00:49:46Nothing.
00:49:47Well, can I see?
00:49:51John, I just told you there's nothing in the closet.
00:49:54Well, let me see nothing in the closet.
00:49:57It, uh, wouldn't happen to be your old friend Rochelle in there, would it?
00:50:01John, what is it you are accusing me of in my own house?
00:50:05I'm not accusing you of anything.
00:50:07I'm just asking a question.
00:50:09But I do think Kate would like an explanation.
00:50:13You want an explanation?
00:50:15All right.
00:50:17All right.
00:50:17I'll give you an explanation.
00:50:18Kate.
00:50:19Kate, get in here.
00:50:20Kate, I need to talk to you.
00:50:21Why are you yelling?
00:50:22I'm not yelling.
00:50:22Now, Kate, you know that since we got here, there's been some strange things going on in
00:50:27this house.
00:50:29Charlie.
00:50:30They want an explanation.
00:50:31I'm going to give them one.
00:50:32All right.
00:50:32Now, listen.
00:50:33All right.
00:50:34Now, Charlie and I, last night, went to the cemetery and we dug up my great-great-grandfather's
00:50:38grave.
00:50:39Because we were looking for a crystal skull.
00:50:42It's supposed to be magic.
00:50:43Anyway, we dug it up and we got the skull.
00:50:45But we also found my great-great-grandfather.
00:50:48He's dead, but he's alive.
00:50:50I mean, he's a mummy.
00:50:51And we brought him back and he's been staying in the basement.
00:50:55And Charlie and I have just been running through this jungle trying to get the skull back.
00:50:59And that's who's in there for your information, Mr. Sherlock Holmes.
00:51:11Hi, Rochelle.
00:51:13What are you doing in here?
00:51:15There's been a mistake.
00:51:16Apparently.
00:51:17You don't understand.
00:51:18I understand perfectly.
00:51:19No, Keith, listen to me.
00:51:20I have no idea what she was doing in there.
00:51:23Well, who did you think was in there?
00:51:24A mummy.
00:51:25Or maybe even a baby pterodactyl.
00:51:30Ow.
00:51:37Shame on you, Jesse.
00:51:44Look.
00:51:45It's a prehistoric bird.
00:51:50Kate!
00:52:06Here, let me get this from you.
00:52:09Good riddance.
00:52:10She's out of here.
00:52:12Now we can do whatever we want.
00:52:14We'll run around our underwear.
00:52:16Phony phone calls.
00:52:18Shut up, Charlie.
00:52:20Can't you shut your mouth just once?
00:52:29Where's Gramps?
00:52:31Where's Rochelle?
00:52:33Watch this.
00:52:39Jesse.
00:52:42Who is?
00:52:43Hello for you.
00:52:44Um, Rochelle.
00:52:45It's great to see you, but I'm having some family problems right now.
00:52:50Understand?
00:52:53Charlie, can you call Rochelle a cab?
00:52:56Hey, Chucky.
00:52:58Hey, don't call me Chucky, okay?
00:53:02It's very sweet of you to come.
00:53:07Thanks.
00:53:09Thanks.
00:53:22Hey, there, Bertie.
00:53:25How about a little trade, huh?
00:53:27Okay.
00:53:28Come on.
00:53:29Stay.
00:53:30Come on.
00:53:31Whoa!
00:53:44Hey, I think he wants some more.
00:53:47I don't have any more, Stay.
00:53:50Hey, now, now, now, I know that smells good.
00:53:55I know it smells good.
00:53:56Daddy's going to have it ready right away.
00:53:58Right away.
00:54:00Yeah.
00:54:01Yep, yep, yep.
00:54:02I know.
00:54:03I know Daddy knows.
00:54:06Now, open your mouth.
00:54:08Yeah.
00:54:19Gramps, I'm sorry I yelled at you.
00:54:22You got me a little upset.
00:54:25Well, I was just hankin' to play a joke on somebody, and I'm sorry that it turned out
00:54:38to be you.
00:54:40That's enough, Bippy.
00:54:42Bippy.
00:54:43Bippy, that's enough.
00:54:45Now, don't you?
00:54:46Bippy.
00:54:48Oh, now, look.
00:54:51Just come on out and pray.
00:54:52Hey, that's it.
00:54:55There you go.
00:54:56Um, Gramps, look, I gotta get to bed.
00:54:59Do you want me to put the skull back in the fireplace?
00:55:03I'll take care of that.
00:55:34Do you want me to put the school back in the fireplace?
00:55:36Bye.
00:55:37Bye.
00:55:38Bye.
00:55:38Bye.
00:55:41Bye.
00:55:43Bye.
00:55:44Bye.
00:55:44Bye.
00:56:01Oh, my God.
00:56:23You scared the bejesus out of me.
00:57:12You scared the bejesus out of me.
00:57:15You scared the bejesus out of me.
00:57:25You scared the bejesus out of me.
00:57:29You scared the bejesus out of me.
00:57:42Come on.
00:57:43Come on.
00:57:44Come on.
00:57:45Oh, Jesus.
00:57:46Charlie.
00:57:47Come on.
00:57:48Charlie.
00:57:49Charlie.
00:57:50Get up.
00:57:54You scared the bejesus out of me.
00:57:56You scared the bejesus out of me.
00:57:58You scared the bejesus out of me.
00:58:20Bill.
00:58:21Bill Towner.
00:58:22Electrician.
00:58:22Jesse McLaughlin.
00:58:23Nice to meet you, Jesse.
00:58:24Young lady called.
00:58:25Said you needed some work done.
00:58:26She did, huh?
00:58:27Oh, right.
00:58:27What is the fuse box down there in the basement?
00:58:29Listen, Bill.
00:58:31I'm sorry to trouble you, but this really isn't the right time.
00:58:33It's all right, Jess.
00:58:34I'm not going to get in your way.
00:58:35You just show me what needs fixing.
00:58:37This is quite a room you got here.
00:58:39Yeah.
00:58:40Very, very nice.
00:58:42It's a weird fireplace, huh?
00:58:43Yeah.
00:58:43Uh, Bill.
00:58:45Uh, Bill.
00:58:46What do we got in here?
00:58:47Ah!
00:58:47There it is.
00:58:50Fremont 240.
00:58:51These old houses are loaded with them.
00:58:53So, uh, this the room you're having problems here with, Jess?
00:58:56Uh, yeah.
00:58:56All along this wall.
00:58:58Uh, but the rest of the house is fine.
00:59:01Yeah, I wouldn't worry about that, Jess.
00:59:02Didn't look too valuable.
00:59:07Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep.
00:59:08Just as I had expected.
00:59:11Jess, you got a problem here.
00:59:13But, uh, hey, like with any problem, you know, you don't want to go to get the best of you.
00:59:16You know, I've been working on these houses for about 20 years now,
00:59:19and I've seen enough tragedy and disaster to make you want to upchuck in your shorts.
00:59:24You see, these old houses, they, uh, they just got minds of their own, you know?
00:59:28And you just got to teach them who's boss.
00:59:31You know, sort of give them a spanking.
00:59:33Ha!
00:59:33Must be foreign made.
00:59:35Well, I'm gonna fix this old house up for you, Jess.
00:59:39Just like it's a brand spanking new.
00:59:56What is that?
01:00:18What do you hear?
01:00:20Ah, Jess, Jess, Jess, Jess.
01:00:22It's not good.
01:00:23I've seen this before.
01:00:25It's always made my adenoids curdle.
01:00:28Oh, hey, don't monkey with those switches, Jess.
01:00:30It'll blow us both to Milwaukee.
01:00:33Ah, it's touch and go from here, pal.
01:00:35Could go either way, Jess.
01:00:36Oh, yeah, yeah, Jess.
01:00:38I'm gonna, uh, step into my office here for a second.
01:00:41Listen, buddy, uh, I like to be alone with my work, so if you don't mind...
01:00:48You got something to do?
01:00:49Sure.
01:00:50Go do it, buddy.
01:00:51Go do it.
01:00:53Go do it.
01:00:54Nice kid.
01:01:16Go do it, buddy.
01:01:30Oops.
01:01:46Weird.
01:01:58You see anything?
01:02:01Forget it.
01:02:04I'm not going up there, Gramps.
01:02:05He's going to get his own damn skull.
01:02:07Come on, Charlie.
01:02:08Gramps said they weren't here,
01:02:09so don't wimp out on...
01:02:10Hey, buddy!
01:02:14Oh, scared you, huh?
01:02:15Relax.
01:02:16Oh, God, Bill, are you all right?
01:02:17Yeah, fine, fine, fine.
01:02:19Who is this?
01:02:21Uh, Bill.
01:02:22Bill Towner. Electrician?
01:02:25Charlie Coriel.
01:02:27Entrepreneur.
01:02:28Uh, listen, fellas,
01:02:30we've got a little problem in the other room.
01:02:31I think you'd better come have a look.
01:02:32Uh, look, Bill, I'm sorry,
01:02:34but this really isn't a good time.
01:02:35Why don't you pack it up
01:02:36and come back tomorrow?
01:02:37I think we'd better go in the other room
01:02:39and have a look.
01:02:50Well, there it is.
01:02:53Looks like you got some kind of alternate universe in there or something.
01:02:58Thanks.
01:03:00Come on, Charlie.
01:03:03Guess I'm next.
01:03:05Just let me spiders in there,
01:03:06because you know I...
01:03:07You coming, Charlie?
01:03:10Hey, uh, I don't know you guys.
01:03:12Look, that's an alternate dimension there or something,
01:03:14and, uh...
01:03:15Incredible.
01:03:16Uh-huh.
01:03:18Well, hold on a second, will you?
01:03:20Uh, I've been through this kind of thing before.
01:03:23Just don't touch anything till I get there.
01:03:27Looks like you're gonna need the help of a professional.
01:03:36You got a flashlight?
01:03:38Yeah.
01:03:39You got a flashlight?
01:03:51You know something?
01:03:53I'm incredibly scared right now.
01:03:55Don't be a fag, okay?
01:03:59Listen.
01:04:00I think it's coming from over there.
01:04:02I think it's coming from over there.
01:04:28There it is.
01:04:30There it is.
01:04:33Well, it's not gonna be easy.
01:04:42They're not gonna sacrifice anything, are they?
01:04:44Hey, Jess.
01:04:45Now, now, is she a virgin?
01:04:46Because I've never seen one before, and she was really mad at my man.
01:04:50Hey!
01:04:54Hey!
01:04:54Hey!
01:04:56Hey!
01:04:57No!
01:04:59Oh, boy.
01:05:01I?
01:05:02Well, hey!
01:05:03Hey!
01:05:03Come on!
01:05:04Come on!
01:05:05Uh, well, I'm sorry.
01:05:06We thought, uh, she was somebody that we knew.
01:05:08Go ahead, enjoy.
01:05:09It's, it's, it's okay.
01:05:12She's gonna come.
01:05:13I'm gonna come.
01:05:13I'm gonna come!
01:05:19Uh!
01:05:19Watch this, sir!
01:05:20I'm gonna come!
01:05:26Watch this!
01:05:33Let's go!
01:05:48Oh, neat, huh?
01:05:50Ha, ha, ha, ha.
01:05:55Ah, you...
01:06:18Come on, come on.
01:06:20Get her out of here.
01:06:42Come on, get out of here, I'll hold you up.
01:06:49I don't remember which way.
01:06:51Just follow the street.
01:06:52Come on.
01:06:53Oh, come on.
01:06:55Don't worry about me.
01:06:57I've got to get home.
01:06:58My kid's a little ignited.
01:07:00Oh, my God!
01:07:08Come on, Phil, I don't see him.
01:07:10Come on.
01:07:15Hey, Phil.
01:07:16Oh, all right.
01:07:18Oh, Charlie, good to see you back.
01:07:19I started to get a little concerned here.
01:07:22Hey, hey, Bill, what are you doing here?
01:07:24You know, you guys throw one heck of a party.
01:07:26And I'd really like to thank you for inviting me along.
01:07:31Jess, it's been a pleasure.
01:07:32And, miss, it was a pleasure to meet you.
01:07:39Oh, and, uh, Jess, listen, if you need any more work done, just give me a call there, huh?
01:07:44Take care, Charlie.
01:07:45See ya.
01:07:49Who was that man?
01:08:02Oh, where the hell's the food?
01:08:04I don't know.
01:08:06And tell them we're starving.
01:08:10You know, I've been watching her, and she really likes you.
01:08:15Seriously, she likes you.
01:08:16Come on, Charlie.
01:08:18Oh, I'm serious.
01:08:20Watch.
01:08:21Who do you like better?
01:08:24Me or him?
01:08:27Me, Charlie, fun, you know, crazy guy, nut, or him?
01:08:38I rest my case, Jess.
01:08:40Ow!
01:08:43All right.
01:08:45Well, if, uh, everybody's hungry,
01:08:46uh, diggin' while it's hustling.
01:08:48Uh, Jess, uh, shouldn't we say grace, you know,
01:08:50say a few nice words about God or whatever?
01:08:53Um.
01:08:59Oh, all right.
01:09:00Uh, I guess I'd just like to
01:09:04thank everyone for their
01:09:07special contribution to the meal.
01:09:10and to say that
01:09:12I guess I, I think of all of you as
01:09:16as all my, my family now.
01:09:20That was well put, son.
01:09:22Now let's eat.
01:09:25Yeah.
01:09:26Yeah.
01:09:27Come on.
01:09:28Oh, come on.
01:09:56Slim, low down, Weasel.
01:10:02I've been waiting for you.
01:10:03Long time, partner.
01:10:12Johnny!
01:10:14He's mine.
01:10:19I knew you'd catch up with me sooner or later.
01:10:41Gramps!
01:10:42Bits!
01:10:47Marley!
01:11:07After all this time, he got me.
01:11:15You're gonna need this.
01:11:22He's the one that killed your mind, Pa.
01:11:53He's the one that killed your mind.
01:12:22He's the one that killed your mind.
01:12:24He's the one that killed your mind.
01:12:35He's the one that killed her.
01:13:00THE END
01:13:28Oh my God
01:13:32Charlie
01:13:33Charlie
01:13:35Charlie
01:13:35I can't get you
01:14:10I can't get you
01:14:23Oh, my God.
01:14:51Oh, my God.
01:15:14Oh, my God.
01:15:44Oh, my God.
01:16:08Oh, my God.
01:16:12Oh, my God.
01:17:05Oh, my God.
01:17:08Oh, my God.
01:17:12Oh, my God.
01:17:21Oh, my God.
01:17:30Oh, my God.
01:17:39Oh, my God.
01:17:59Oh, my God.
01:18:19Oh, my God.
01:18:24Oh, my God.
01:18:28Oh, my God.
01:18:31Oh, my God.
01:18:35Oh, my God.
01:18:49Oh, my God.
01:18:55Oh, my God.
01:18:59Oh, my God.
01:19:01Oh, my God.
01:19:02Oh, my God.
01:19:04Oh, my God.
01:19:07Oh, my God.
01:19:26Did you blow his head off?
01:19:32That's a good boy.
01:19:37I thought for sure he'd kick your ass.
01:19:45But I didn't let on, though, did I, son?
01:19:48No, you didn't, Grants.
01:19:57This is it, kid.
01:20:01You're not going to die.
01:20:04The skull's right here.
01:20:08I don't make no difference no more, son.
01:20:14I've done all I can do in this world.
01:20:19And it's time to move on.
01:20:22No, no, don't.
01:20:28You get what you want from this old skull.
01:20:31You know, I got something real special.
01:20:38I got to meet my great-great-grandson and had a hell of a time.
01:20:48And you figure what you want.
01:20:52You didn't get rid of the goddamn thing.
01:21:01Come on.
01:21:04Come on, Grants.
01:21:07Hold on.
01:21:12Hold on, Grants.
01:21:15I love you, Grants.
01:21:20I love you, too, Jesse.
01:21:41Jesse, this is your last chance.
01:21:45Come out with your hands up.
01:21:46I'm going to count to ten.
01:21:49And they were coming in firing.
01:21:53One.
01:21:55Two.
01:21:57Three.
01:21:59Four.
01:22:02Five.
01:22:04Six.
01:22:06Seven.
01:22:08Eight.
01:22:10Ah!
01:22:11Ah!
01:22:11Take cover!
01:22:13Zero, stop!
01:22:14One-eighty-one at one-seven-one.
01:22:16Five.
01:22:17Seven-one.
01:22:19Keep your head.
01:22:21Take him.
01:22:28One-seven-one.
01:22:30Four.
01:22:31Four.
01:22:32Five.
01:22:32Five.
01:22:34Five.
01:22:37Five.
01:22:39Five.
01:22:39Five.
01:22:40Five.
01:22:41Five.
01:22:42Five.
01:23:10Oh, my God.
01:23:14Oh, my God.
01:24:10Oh, my God.
01:24:36Oh, my God.
01:24:47Oh, my God.
01:24:55Oh, my God.
01:24:57Oh, my God.
01:25:08Oh, my God.
01:25:15Oh, my God.
01:25:45Oh, my God.
01:26:15Oh, my God.
01:26:45Oh, my God.
01:27:15Oh, my God.
01:27:45Oh, my God.
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