00:02One week till our sweet 16.
00:04After four years of being apart, we are finally together on our birthday.
00:08Yay, Z's!
00:10I know!
00:11We get to blow out our candles together again.
00:13The three Rooney girls, together again and ready to pour it!
00:20Don't turn around.
00:21You don't want to know what Mom's doing behind you.
00:23I don't need to.
00:25I can feel the desperation on the back of my neck.
00:30All right, fine.
00:32Guess I'll just save my moves for the party.
00:35Back that party up over here, care baby.
00:45Anyway, so for our party, I had a few thoughts.
00:56I had a thought.
01:05Okay, so I'm thinking red carpet designer gowns.
01:11We enter Cirque du Soleil style spiraling in on silks.
01:17I'm thinking peanut shells on the floor, steaks the size of our heads.
01:23We enter, hungry man style, in our casual eating pails.
01:30Natty, this is our big one-six.
01:33It needs to be epic.
01:35I know.
01:36And I'm thinking epic.
01:38There's this new cowboy jail-themed restaurant, the Hooskow.
01:46We have very different ideas of epic.
01:51You know what's epic?
01:53Mini golf birthday parties.
01:56They worked for years for you two.
01:59Ages six to eleven.
02:01Done.
02:01Yes, yes, that's right.
02:04Matty, you loved it because it was sporty.
02:06And Liv, there was a castle so you could dress up like a princess.
02:09And I loved it because you two were together celebrating your birthday.
02:14So, Rooney girls, let's get ready to party.
02:22Stop.
02:26Hater.
02:27Hater.
02:28Hater.
02:32As fun as mini golf was, we are turning sixteen now.
02:37So, we can plan our own party.
02:40So, let's just talk this out because nothing's been set in stone.
02:43Liv, I picked out the silks for your epic party entrance.
02:51Epically bad decision to bring them home on my bike.
02:57The silks have already been ordered?
03:01You've already planned our entire party, haven't you?
03:04Well, it's not like I could leave it up to you.
03:07I mean, casual eating pants?
03:09Spiraling it on silks?
03:10You're being impossible.
03:12Oh, I wish we could just have separate birthdays.
03:29A little help?
03:35Spiraling it on silks, obies,hoof, van-oip-an-oip-an-oip-an-oip-an-oip-an-oip.
03:39I'm up with the sunshine.
03:42At least I'd do my heart's up to you.
03:45Slam dunk, ready or not.
03:47Yeah, show me what you got.
03:49I'm under the spotlight.
03:51I say you come on and follow. You dance to your own beat. I'll sing the melody when you say
04:00yeah. I say no when you say so. All I want to do is go, go, go.
04:10You, you, you're the half of me, me. The half will never be. The half that drops me crazy. You,
04:21you, you're the half of me, me. The half will always be. But we both know we're better in stereo.
04:30No. My twins can't have separate parties on their sweet 16. So while you two were at Maddie's basketball game,
04:44I came up with a mom-promise. So take a look.
04:53That's okay! Awesome! Hold on, you haven't seen the best part. Turn around. Two themes, one party.
05:09It's a red carpet warrior! Hey, why isn't this thing working?
05:15So, Maddie, honey, you wanted to go to the Who Scout. So we're gonna have a western barbecue right here
05:22in the house, Joey.
05:24Mom, I don't want to say it. Oh, come on, say it. Yee-haw!
05:31And Liv, you wanted a Cirque du Soleil red carpet gala. I bring you park-a-rotsie!
05:39Say, Roni! Live, Roni! Who are you wearing?
05:45Boom! Boom! Boom! Then, boom! Boom, this is great!
05:51And I think we're halfway there. The half of it doesn't look like a barn.
05:55So, I think we should clear out these hay bales and, uh, ooh, all the barbecue-y stuff.
06:02And I just really wanna, you know, class this place up, you know?
06:05I think we're gonna bring in some French contortionists.
06:08Liv, why are you throwing out everything that I like?
06:12I thought this was our party.
06:15Honey, it's time to come clean.
06:18We've kept this secret for too long.
06:21No, Pete. I'm not telling you they were born on separate days.
06:31Damn-town ladies, sing that song.
06:36Karaoke thing works great.
06:40Who's next?
06:41What did you just say?
06:43We have different birthdays?
06:45Girls, your mother and I have something to tell you.
06:50Yes.
06:51Go ahead.
06:56Liv and Maddie,
06:57the day you were born was truly the greatest day of my life.
07:02Oh, that feels nice.
07:08But it was actually the days you were born.
07:12You see, Liv,
07:13you were born on the 5th at 11.56 p.m.
07:17But Maddie, honey,
07:18you were born
07:19at 12.02 on the
07:226th.
07:23But the whole reason
07:25that 5 is my lucky number
07:27is because I was born on the 5th.
07:29I'm a 5.
07:32Apparently, I'm a 0.
07:36Wait, so
07:37Maddie's never celebrated
07:39on her actual birthday?
07:43What kind of parents
07:45are you?
07:49This is preposterous.
07:51I say again, preposterous.
07:54If they can do this to her,
07:56what does that mean for everybody else?
07:59Am I 6?
08:00Am I 11?
08:01I could be 9.
08:08Hey.
08:10Hey.
08:15Maddie, honey,
08:16I am so sorry.
08:17You know,
08:18every year,
08:19your birthday would roll around
08:20and I would just get so excited
08:22at the two of you
08:24sitting together
08:24blowing out your candles.
08:26Then why did you use
08:27those trick candles
08:28that didn't blow out?
08:32We wanted the moment
08:33to last forever.
08:36Plus,
08:37a joint birthday party
08:39is double the fun.
08:41It's also half the work.
08:43See, I'm trying to be
08:44completely honest with you
08:45from now on.
08:49Don't try and be funny.
08:51I'm still trying
08:51to be mad at you.
08:54Oh, honey,
08:54I'm so sorry.
08:55I thought I was
08:56doing the right thing.
08:58You know,
08:58when you and Liv
08:59were little,
09:00you were inseparable.
09:01As your mother,
09:02it just felt wrong
09:03to take that special day away.
09:05Are you seriously
09:06trying to take credit
09:07for being a good mother
09:08right now?
09:09Yes,
09:09I tried to slip that in.
09:13Now,
09:13just tell me
09:14what you want to do
09:15for your birthday
09:15and your father
09:16and I will make it happen.
09:17Sky's the limit.
09:19Okay,
09:19there is a budget.
09:20See,
09:20I'm trying to be
09:21totally honest.
09:24Thanks, Mom,
09:25but honestly,
09:27the last thing
09:28I feel like doing
09:28right now
09:29is celebrating
09:29my birthday.
09:30I don't even think
09:31I want to have a party
09:32at all this year.
09:33I'm sure Liv feels
09:33the exact same way.
09:35Well,
09:35think about it.
09:36In the meantime,
09:38I made your favorite dinner,
09:39chicken pot pie.
09:41Okay,
09:41I didn't make it.
09:42It was frozen
09:43from a box.
09:44The truth really
09:46will set you free.
09:52Okay,
09:52everyone,
09:53find a seat.
09:54Maddie's off on a jog,
09:55but I bought us some time.
09:57She always jogs
09:58till the end
09:58of her play list,
09:59so I added six songs.
10:02Hey,
10:02Joey,
10:03I got a spot
10:04for you right here.
10:07I'm going to say yes
10:09because I am scared
10:10to say no.
10:18Okay,
10:19you're all here
10:20because you are
10:21Maddie's best friends
10:22and family,
10:22and I want you
10:23to help me
10:23throw a surprise party
10:24for her.
10:25You have to keep it
10:26a secret.
10:28I know that won't
10:29be a problem
10:30for you, too.
10:33Mom said Maddie
10:34doesn't even want
10:35to party this year.
10:36Also,
10:37I cannot feel
10:38my ribs.
10:41I can.
10:42Maddie says
10:43she doesn't want
10:44to party,
10:44but I know
10:45my sister better.
10:46This birthday shocker
10:47has knocked her
10:48for a loop,
10:48and we are going
10:49to fix it.
10:50This is very sweet.
10:51Will,
10:52you're totally
10:52on the hook
10:53for this.
10:55careful.
10:56Right,
10:56sorry.
10:58Willow,
10:59Dickey,
10:59Staines,
11:00and the rest
11:01of us get
11:01the house
11:01ready for the
11:02party.
11:03Don't bring her
11:04home until midnight,
11:05though,
11:05because that's
11:05when her actual
11:06birthday begins.
11:07Oh,
11:07midnight,
11:08isn't that awfully
11:08late for a party?
11:10You mean like
11:1116 years late,
11:13Mom?
11:16Midnight party,
11:17fun.
11:24Hey,
11:25Mads,
11:25what are you
11:25doing?
11:26I am turning
11:28all my lucky
11:28fives into
11:30sixes.
11:32Turns out,
11:33the first 15
11:33years of my life,
11:34I stuck fives
11:36everywhere.
11:39Everywhere.
11:44Identity crisis.
11:45I can relate.
11:46I remember
11:47the tough
11:47transition from
11:48Joseph to
11:49Joe,
11:50to Joey,
11:51but the brief
11:52stint is
11:52baby Jay,
11:55and ultimately
11:56back to
11:56Joey.
11:57Wasn't there a
11:58jay dog in there
11:59somewhere?
12:00Bring that up.
12:06Maddie and
12:07Joey Rooney.
12:08Character from
12:08My Nightmares?
12:11Delivery.
12:12Delivery.
12:13Delivery.
12:14Delivery.
12:15Delivery.
12:15Delivery.
12:16You are cordially
12:17invited to the
12:18Cirque du Soleil
12:19red carpet gala
12:20celebrating the
12:21sweet 16 of
12:22Liv Rooney.
12:24Liv's throwing
12:25a party for
12:26herself?
12:28The invitations
12:29Pretzelbutt was
12:30handing out for
12:31a fake party to
12:32throw Maddie off
12:33the set.
12:33My job was to
12:35twist the knife
12:35ever so delicately.
12:38I have a gentle
12:39touch.
12:41Well, Liv took
12:43this whole birthday
12:44scandal a lot
12:45better than you
12:46did.
12:47A lot better.
12:50A lot.
12:53I can't believe
12:55she just dumped
12:55me to do her
12:56own thing.
12:57Yeah.
12:58Does that make
12:59you mad?
13:00I bet I'd be
13:01mad.
13:02I'd be, like,
13:04really mad.
13:07You know what?
13:09If Liv's throwing
13:10a party for
13:10herself, I'm
13:12throwing a party
13:13for myself.
13:14I'm going to
13:15the Who's Cow.
13:17Oh, okay.
13:18Here comes
13:18Maddie.
13:19Remember, we
13:19have plans on
13:20Sunday.
13:21Hey, guys.
13:22Do you want to
13:22go out for my
13:23birthday?
13:23Who's Cow on
13:24Sunday?
13:24What do you
13:25say?
13:26Yeah, we have
13:26plans on Sunday.
13:29What plans?
13:30I've got a drum
13:34circle washing my
13:39ferret.
13:42A club?
13:47You're in a
13:48book club?
13:49Sure.
13:50Yeah, you know,
13:50every month we
13:51pick a book and
13:52then we watch
13:54the movie and
13:54talk about it.
13:58We're available.
14:00Saturday.
14:01Saturday?
14:03Aren't you guys
14:04going to Liv's
14:04party?
14:06Not invited.
14:07Guess we didn't
14:08make the cut.
14:09Liv's lost.
14:10We're the cool
14:11kids.
14:15Liv's throwing
14:16a party for
14:16herself and she
14:17didn't even invite
14:18my friends.
14:20You know what?
14:22I am free
14:23Saturday.
14:24We're going to
14:25the Who's Cow.
14:27Yeah.
14:28The jaws of my
14:29traptastic planet
14:30closed.
14:32Maddie hated
14:32me.
14:33Hello, best
14:34sister ever.
14:39There you go,
14:40little lady.
14:41And you are
14:42welcome to
14:43his mean return
14:44visit to the
14:45salad bars you
14:46want at the
14:47Who's Cow.
14:48But only under
14:49the watchful eye
14:51of the law.
14:54Watchful eye?
14:55Hardly.
14:56I filled my
14:56whole purse
14:57with baby
14:57corn.
14:59Don't mess with
14:59Sheriff Tim
15:00Willow.
15:01He's packing
15:01ketchup and
15:02mustard.
15:06Dude,
15:07whatever Liv is
15:07doing at her
15:08stupid red
15:08carpet party
15:09cannot be
15:10nearly as
15:11cool as this.
15:12I mean,
15:12I'd much rather
15:13be at a place
15:14where you can
15:14throw your
15:14peanut shells
15:15on the floor.
15:16And rib bumps.
15:22Am I not
15:23supposed to
15:23do that?
15:25Always a lady
15:27sings.
15:28Always a lady.
15:32Ooh, guys are
15:34going to arrest
15:34someone again.
15:35You are under
15:36arrest.
15:37Cattle wrestling,
15:38stagecoach robbery,
15:40and spitting in
15:41the presence of a
15:42lady.
15:44Lock him up!
15:46Lock him up!
15:50Oh, I gotta
15:51take this.
15:57This is
15:57jailhouse one,
15:58over.
15:59Dizzy,
15:59how's it going?
16:00It's great.
16:01We're just about
16:01to order dessert.
16:02She doesn't
16:03suspect a thing.
16:04Dessert?
16:05You can't be
16:06on dessert already.
16:07It's barely
16:07ten o'clock.
16:09You need to
16:09keep her out
16:10of the house
16:10until midnight.
16:12I mean,
16:12yeah,
16:12I'll do what I
16:13can,
16:13but I didn't
16:14expect service
16:15to be this
16:15fantastic at a
16:16restaurant like
16:16this.
16:18Dickie,
16:18I am trying
16:19to do
16:19something nice
16:20for my sister.
16:21Do not
16:21make me
16:21regret trusting
16:22you.
16:25The fate
16:26of my plan
16:27rests on
16:27someone named
16:28Dickie.
16:32They got a
16:33stall for
16:33time.
16:34Not a
16:35prop.
16:35Staines is
16:36doing the
16:36rotisserie chicken
16:37stockade
16:38challenge.
16:45If you
16:45can eat a
16:46whole chicken
16:46in under
16:47an hour,
16:47you get
16:48a free
16:48t-shirt.
16:50Come on,
16:51come on.
16:54White!
16:56You know
16:57what?
16:57Let's just
16:57hold you off
16:58when this
16:58is over.
17:07One layer
17:08cake?
17:09Really?
17:09You think
17:10that's gonna
17:10make up for
17:1116 years
17:12years of
17:13fibs and
17:13fraud?
17:16I was
17:17gonna put
17:17little purple
17:18frosting flowers
17:19on the
17:20corners.
17:20That will
17:21impress no
17:22one.
17:25Well, I
17:26suppose I
17:26could do
17:27a few
17:27more layers.
17:28Yeah,
17:29maybe one
17:30for each
17:30year you
17:31lied.
17:41Wow,
17:43this mini
17:44golf course
17:44actually looks
17:45pretty good.
17:47I'm glad
17:48someone's
17:49paying attention
17:50to what
17:50Liv's trying
17:51to pull
17:51off.
17:53Let's see
17:53the window
17:53spin.
17:54Oh,
17:54it doesn't
17:55actually
17:55spin.
17:56Yeah,
17:57no,
17:57it's
17:57decorative.
17:58Like the
17:58treadmill in
17:59Mom and
17:59Dad's
17:59bedroom.
18:02Are you
18:02kidding me?
18:04A crummy
18:05cake and
18:06a non-spinny
18:07windmill?
18:08Liv is
18:09trying to
18:09recreate the
18:10mini golf
18:11parties of
18:11Matty's
18:12youth.
18:12And if
18:13we're gonna
18:13do this,
18:13we're gonna
18:14do this
18:14right.
18:15I guess
18:16we could
18:16take apart
18:17one of my
18:17remote-controlled
18:18cars and use
18:19the motor from
18:20that to make
18:20it spin.
18:21Yeah,
18:22we could do
18:22that.
18:23We can
18:23also play
18:24Duck,
18:24Duck,
18:24Goose.
18:25Am I the
18:25only one
18:25that cares?
18:29We could
18:30take apart
18:31the riding
18:31mower and
18:32use the
18:32motor from
18:33that bad
18:34boy.
18:35Now we're
18:36talking
18:37birthday magic,
18:39monkeys.
18:39Let's go,
18:40let's go.
18:42Where are you
18:43going?
18:44It's already
18:45two hours past
18:46my bedtime.
18:47If I don't
18:48take a nap
18:48before the
18:49party,
18:49I'm gonna
18:49be a real
18:50cranky pants.
18:56Good job,
18:57Staines.
18:58I have
18:58never been
18:59more impressed
19:00or disgusted.
19:04And you
19:05know you
19:05didn't have
19:06to eat the
19:06bones to
19:07win the
19:08shirt,
19:08right?
19:09I commit,
19:10I commit,
19:11man.
19:13Here's your
19:14birthday,
19:15little lady.
19:18It's not
19:18my actual
19:19birthday till
19:19midnight.
19:20Well,
19:21blow off
19:21the candle.
19:22It's
19:22somebody's
19:23birthday.
19:26Go ahead,
19:27Maddie,
19:27make a wish.
19:29Guys,
19:29I can't.
19:31Sheriff
19:32Tim was
19:32right,
19:33it is
19:33somebody's
19:34birthday.
19:35It's
19:35Liz's.
19:36And the
19:37only wish
19:38that popped
19:38into my
19:39head was
19:39that I
19:40wish we
19:41were blowing
19:41out our
19:41candles
19:42together,
19:42so.
19:43That's so
19:44sweet.
19:45Let's get
19:45your home
19:45right now.
19:51Uh,
19:52get up.
19:54Are you
19:55sure?
19:56We've
19:57barely been
19:57here for
19:58four hours.
20:00You are
20:01under arrest
20:02cattle rustling.
20:03Wait,
20:04you're
20:05arresting the
20:05wrong bandit.
20:06This girl
20:07here,
20:07she's the
20:07cattle rustler.
20:08Yeah,
20:09man.
20:09Lock her
20:10up.
20:11Lock her
20:12up.
20:13Lock her
20:13up.
20:16Guys!
20:17Guys!
20:18Let me
20:19out.
20:19I need
20:20to get
20:20to Liz's
20:21party before
20:21it's over.
20:22Good move,
20:23Diggy.
20:24I'm
20:25smooth under
20:26pressure.
20:27There's a new
20:28sheriff in town
20:29and his name
20:29is Diggy
20:30and he's
20:31the meanest
20:31sheriff on
20:32your...
20:36We're
20:37out of
20:37here.
20:39Maddie,
20:40wait.
20:47Mr. and
20:48Mrs.
20:49Joey and
20:49Willow
20:50Rooney.
20:56It's midnight.
20:58Seriously,
20:59Diggy?
20:5916 wrong
21:00turns?
21:04I've never
21:05heard of that
21:05law that
21:05says you
21:06have to
21:06go five
21:06miles an
21:07hour past
21:07a graveyard.
21:09That's just
21:09showing respect,
21:11man.
21:14Wait a second,
21:15I don't hear
21:15music.
21:16And the red
21:17carpet is
21:18rolled up.
21:18You guys,
21:19I missed
21:20Liv's birthday.
21:27Upper was
21:28really great
21:29at the
21:29hoose cow.
21:33Where is
21:34everybody?
21:44We missed
21:45saying surprise.
21:46Are you
21:47kidding me?
21:52Happy
21:53sweet 16,
21:54Maddie.
21:55Wait,
21:56this is all
21:56for me?
21:58Where's
21:58your red
21:59carpet party?
22:00Oh,
22:00there was
22:01no party.
22:02I totally
22:03played you.
22:03Don't feel
22:04bad,
22:04though.
22:05I am
22:05a day
22:06older.
22:12Hey,
22:13remember
22:13us?
22:13The people
22:14you were
22:14screaming at
22:15the whole
22:16way past
22:17the graveyard?
22:18You guys
22:18were all
22:19in on
22:19this?
22:22Liv,
22:24mini golf,
22:25this is
22:26just like
22:26old times.
22:28We got
22:28so wrapped
22:29up in
22:29which kind
22:30of party
22:30we each
22:31wanted that
22:31we forgot
22:32the best
22:33part is
22:33doing it
22:33together.
22:36Someone
22:37made you
22:37a cake.
22:41Guys,
22:42a basketball
22:43cake?
22:44This is
22:45amazing.
22:4616 layers
22:47of buttercream
22:48and guilt.
22:49Mama's done
22:50her time.
22:50We're moving
22:51on.
22:52And now
22:53the Rooney
22:54girls are
22:54ready to
22:55get their
22:55a-poree-on,
22:57a-poree-on,
22:59a-poree-on,
23:00a-poree-on,
23:02a-poree-on,
23:02a-poree-on,
23:03a-poree-on,
23:04a-poree-on.
23:05Stop punishing
23:05us.
23:07Daddy,
23:08we even
23:10got you
23:10a number
23:11six jersey
23:12because we
23:13figured you'd
23:13want to
23:14change your
23:14number.
23:18So,
23:19Liv,
23:19come over
23:19with candles.
23:21Okay,
23:21one sec.
23:22I want to
23:22get a video
23:23of this.
23:23I think
23:23I left
23:24my phone
23:24in the
23:24garage
23:24when I
23:25was
23:25grabbing
23:25decorations.
23:28Video?
23:29Then we've
23:30got to have
23:30the windmill
23:31going.
23:32Dad,
23:32turn it
23:33on.
23:34Yes?
23:36Yes?
23:37Oh!
23:44Guys,
23:44I love it.
23:45We did a
23:46good thing
23:46today,
23:47boys.
23:48See what
23:48happens when
23:49you listen
23:49to Parker?
23:56That thing
23:57kicks up
23:58like a breeze.
24:07Oh,
24:07no,
24:08the cake!
24:14We have to
24:15turn this thing
24:16off!
24:18Don't
24:19worry,
24:19birthday girl.
24:20Your hero's
24:22here.
24:37Hey,
24:38superhero.
24:39Slug's right
24:40here.
24:59nice work on
25:00the cake,
25:00mom!
25:08Hey,
25:09Parker,
25:09check it
25:10out.
25:10Liv got us
25:11a present
25:11for helping
25:12out with
25:12the party.
25:13It's nice
25:14to be
25:14appreciated.
25:19Surprise!
25:21Surprise!
25:25Dude,
25:26that was
25:26awesome.
25:27Nice work,
25:27pretzel butt.
25:28Up top!
25:32Hey,
25:33can you
25:33fit my
25:33underwear drawer?
25:34I want to
25:34freak
25:34out my
25:35mom.her
25:39Let's
25:39you you
25:40you
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