00:02One week till our sweet 16.
00:04After four years of being apart, we are finally together on our birthday.
00:08Yay, Z's!
00:10I know!
00:11We get to blow out our candles together again.
00:13The three Rooney girls, together again and ready to pour it!
00:20Don't turn around.
00:21You don't want to know what Mom's doing behind you.
00:23I don't need to.
00:25I can feel the desperation on the back of my neck.
00:30All right, fine.
00:32Guess I'll just save my moves for the party.
00:35Back that party up over here, care baby.
00:39Oh, boy, boy.
00:43Right, right, right.
00:47Anyway, so for our party, I had a few thoughts.
00:56I had a thought.
01:05Okay, so I'm thinking red carpet designer gowns.
01:11We enter Cirque du Soleil style, spiraling it on silks.
01:17I'm thinking peanut shells on the floor, steaks the size of our heads.
01:23We enter, hungry man style, in our casual eating pails.
01:30Natty, this is our big one-six.
01:33It needs to be epic.
01:35I know.
01:36And I'm thinking epic.
01:38There's this new cowboy jail-themed restaurant, the Hooskow.
01:46We have very different ideas of epic.
01:50You know what's epic?
01:53Mini golf birthday parties.
01:56They worked for years for you two, ages 6 to 11.
02:01Done.
02:02Yes, yes, Dad's right.
02:04Maddie, you loved it because it was sporty.
02:06And Liv, there was a castle so you could dress up like a princess.
02:09And I loved it because you two were together celebrating your birthday.
02:14So, Rooney girls, let's get ready to party.
02:18Oh, boy.
02:20I'm going to party.
02:21Mom, Mom.
02:22Mom.
02:24Stop.
02:26Hater.
02:32As fun as mini golf was, we're turning 16 now.
02:37So, we can plan our own party.
02:39So, let's just talk this out because nothing's been set in stone.
02:43Liv, I picked out the silks for your epic party entrance.
02:51Epically bad decision to bring them home on my bike.
02:58The silks have already been ordered?
03:01You've already planned our entire party, haven't you?
03:04Well, it's not like I could leave it up to you.
03:07I mean, casual eating pants?
03:09Spiraling it on silks?
03:10You're being impossible.
03:12Oh, I wish we could just have separate birthdays.
03:29A little help?
03:31I wish we could just go home on my bike.
03:34I agree.
03:52That's going to go ahead.
03:57I'll sing the melody when you say yeah
04:02I'll say no when you say so
04:06All I wanna do is go, go, go
04:10You, you, you're the house of me, me
04:13The house will never be me
04:16I have to trust it, baby
04:20You, you, you're the house of me, me
04:24The house will always be me
04:27But we both know we're better in stereo
04:36My twins can't have separate parties on their sweet 16
04:40So, while you two were at Maddie's basketball game
04:44I came up with a mom-promise
04:48So, take a look
04:53That's okay
04:56Awesome
04:59Hold on, you haven't seen the best part
05:02Turn around
05:05Two themes, one party
05:09It's a red carpet
05:11Hey, why isn't this thing working?
05:16So, Maddie, honey
05:17You wanted to go to the Who Scout
05:19So, we're gonna have a western barbecue
05:21Right here in the house
05:23Joey
05:24Mom, I don't wanna say it
05:25Oh, come on, say it
05:27Yee-haw
05:31And Liv, you wanted a Cirque du Soleil red carpet gala
05:37I bring you Parker-Rot-See
05:39Lebroni, Lebroni
05:41Who are you wearing?
05:45Boom
05:45Boom
05:46Boom
05:47Then
05:48Boom
05:50Boom, this is great
05:51And I think we're halfway there
05:52The half of it doesn't look like a barn
05:54So
05:57I think we should clear out these hay bales
05:59And, uh
06:00Ooh
06:00All the barbecue-y stuff
06:02And I just really wanna, you know
06:04Class this place up, you know
06:05I think we're gonna bring in some French contortionists
06:08Liv, why aren't you throwing out everything that I like?
06:11I thought this was our party
06:15Honey
06:15It's time to come clean
06:18We've kept this secret for too long
06:21No, Pete
06:22I'm not telling you they were bored on separate dates
06:31Damn town ladies, sing that song
06:36Karaoke thing works great
06:40Who's next?
06:41What did you just say?
06:43We have different birthdays?
06:45Girls
06:46Your mother and I have something to tell you
06:51Go ahead
06:56Liv and Maddie
06:57The day you were born was truly the greatest day of my life
07:02Oh, that feels nice
07:08But it was actually the days you were born
07:11You see, Liv
07:13You were born on the 5th at 11.56pm
07:17But Maddie, honey
07:18You were born
07:19At 12.02 on the 6th
07:23But the whole reason that 5 is my lucky number
07:27Is because I was born on the 5th
07:29I'm a 5th
07:32Apparently I'm a 0
07:36Wait, so Maddie's never celebrated on her actual birthday?
07:43What kind of parents are you?
07:49This is preposterous
07:51I say again, preposterous
07:54If they can do this to her
07:56What does that mean for everybody else?
07:59Am I 6?
08:00Am I 11?
08:01I could be 9
08:09Hey
08:10Hey
08:15Maddie, honey
08:16I am so sorry
08:17You know, every year your birthday would roll around
08:20And I would just get so excited
08:22At the two of you sitting together
08:24Blowing out your candles
08:26Then why did you use those trick candles
08:28That didn't blow out?
08:32We wanted the moment to last forever
08:36Plus
08:37A joint birthday party is double the fun
08:41It's also half the work
08:43See, I'm trying to be completely honest with you from now on
08:49Don't try and be funny
08:51I'm still trying to be mad at you
08:54Oh, honey, I'm so sorry
08:55I thought I was doing the right thing
08:57You know, when you and Liv were little
08:59You were inseparable
09:01As your mother, it just felt wrong to take that special day away
09:05Are you seriously trying to take credit for being a good mother right now?
09:09Yes, I tried to zip that in
09:12Now, just tell me what you want to do for your birthday
09:15And your father and I will make it happen
09:17Sky's the limit
09:19Okay, there is a budget
09:20See, I'm trying to be totally honest
09:24Thanks, Mom
09:25But honestly, the last thing I feel like doing right now is celebrating my birthday
09:30I don't even think I want to have a party at all this year
09:33I'm sure Liv feels the exact same way
09:34Well, think about it
09:36In the meantime, I made your favorite dinner
09:39Chicken pot pie
09:41Okay, I didn't make it
09:42It was frozen from a box
09:44The truth really will set you free
09:52Okay, everyone find a seat
09:53Maddie's off on a jog
09:55But I bought us some time
09:57She always jogs till the end of her playlist
09:59So I added six songs
10:02Hey, Joey
10:03I got a spot for you right here
10:07I'm going to say yes
10:09Because I am scared to say no
10:18Okay
10:19You're all here because you are Maddie's best friends and family
10:22And I want you to help me throw a surprise party for her
10:25You have to keep it a secret
10:28I know that won't be a problem for you, too
10:33Mom said Maddie doesn't even want a party this year
10:36Also, I cannot feel my ribs
10:41I can
10:42Maddie says she doesn't want a party
10:44But I know my sister better
10:45This birthday shocker has knocked her for a loop
10:48And we are going to fix it
10:50This is very sweet
10:51Will, you're totally on the hook for this
10:55Careful
10:55Right, sorry
10:58Willow, Dickie, Staines
11:00The rest of us get the house ready for the party
11:03Don't bring her home until midnight, though
11:05Because that's when her actual birthday begins
11:07Oh, midnight
11:08Isn't that awfully late for a party
11:09You mean, like
11:12Sixteen years late, Mom?
11:15Midnight party
11:16Fun
11:24Hey, Mads, what are you doing?
11:26I am turning all my lucky fives into sixes
11:32Turns out the first fifteen years of my life
11:34I stuck fives everywhere
11:39Everywhere
11:44Identity crisis
11:45I can relate
11:46I remember the tough transition from Joseph to Joe
11:50To Joey
11:51With a brief stint as Baby Jay
11:55And ultimately back to Joey
11:57And ultimately back to Joey
11:57Isn't there a jay dog in there somewhere?
12:00Bring that up
12:06Maddie and Joey Rooney
12:07Character from my nightmares?
12:11Delivery
12:15You are cordially invited to the Cirque du Soleil Red Carpet Gala
12:20Celebrating the Sweet Sixteen of Liv Rooney
12:24Liv's throwing a party for herself?
12:28The invitations pretzel butt was handing out
12:31For a fake party to throw Maddie off the set
12:33My job was to twist the knife
12:35Ever so delicately
12:37I have a gentle touch
12:41Wow
12:42Liv took this whole birthday scandal a lot better than you did
12:46A lot better
12:50A lot
12:53I can't believe she just dumped me to do her own thing
12:56Yeah
12:57Does that make you mad?
13:00I bet I'd be mad
13:01I'd be like
13:04Really mad
13:07You know what?
13:09If Liv's throwing a party for herself
13:11I'm throwing a party for myself
13:14I'm going to the Who's Cow
13:17Oh, okay
13:18Here comes Maddie
13:19Remember, we have plans on Sunday
13:21Hey guys
13:22Do you want to go out for my birthday?
13:23Who's Cow on Sunday?
13:25What do you say?
13:26Yeah, we have plans on Sunday
13:28What plans?
13:30I've got a drum circle
13:38Washing my ferret
13:42A club?
13:46You're in a book club?
13:49Sure
13:49Yeah, you know
13:50Every month we pick a book
13:52And then we watch the movie and talk about it
13:58We're available Saturday
14:01Saturday?
14:03Aren't you guys going to Liv's party?
14:06Not invited
14:06I guess we didn't make the cut
14:08Liv's lost
14:10We're the cool kids
14:15Liv's throwing a party for herself
14:17And she didn't even invite my friends
14:20You know what?
14:22I am free Saturday
14:24I'm going to the Who's Cow
14:27Yeah
14:28The jaws of my traptastic planet closed
14:31Maddie hated me
14:33Hello
14:34Best sister ever
14:39That is good little lady
14:41And you are welcome
14:43To his mean return visit
14:45To the salad bars
14:46You won't at the Who's Cow
14:47But only
14:49Under the watchful eye of the law
14:54Watchful eye?
14:55Hardly
14:56I filled my whole purse
14:57With baby corn
14:58Don't mess with Sheriff Tim Willow
15:00He's packing ketchup
15:02And mustard
15:06Dude
15:06Whatever Liv is doing
15:07At her stupid red carpet party
15:09Cannot be nearly
15:10As cool as this
15:11I mean
15:12I'd much rather be at a place
15:14Where you can throw your peanut shells
15:15On the floor
15:16And rib bumps
15:22Am I not supposed to do that?
15:26Always the lady sings
15:28Always the lady
15:32Ooh
15:33Guys are going to arrest someone again
15:35You are under arrest
15:37Cattle wrestling
15:38Stagecoach robbery
15:40And spitting
15:41In the presence of a lady
15:43Ooh
15:43Fuck him up
15:46Fuck him up
15:50I gotta take this
15:52This is jailhouse one
15:58I'm over
15:58Diggy
15:59How's it going?
16:00It's great
16:01We're just about to order dessert
16:02She doesn't suspect a thing
16:04Dessert?
16:05You can't be on dessert already
16:06It's barely ten o'clock
16:09You need to keep her out of the house
16:10Until midnight
16:11I mean yeah
16:12I'll do what I can
16:13But I didn't expect service
16:15To be this fantastic
16:16At a restaurant like this
16:18Diggy
16:18I am trying to do something nice
16:20For my sister
16:20Do not make me regret trusting you
16:25The fate of my plan
16:27Rests on someone named
16:28Diggy
16:32They got a stall for time
16:34Not a prop
16:35Stains is doing
16:36The rotisserie chicken
16:37Stockade challenge
16:44If you can eat a whole chicken
16:46In under an hour
16:47You get a free t-shirt
16:56You know what?
16:57Let's just hold you off
16:58When this is over
17:07One layer cake?
17:09Really?
17:09You think that's gonna make up
17:11For sixteen years
17:12Of fibs and fraud?
17:16I was gonna put
17:17Little purple frosting flowers
17:19On the corners
17:20That will impress
17:22No one
17:25Well
17:25I suppose I could do
17:27A few more layers
17:28Yeah
17:29Maybe one for each year
17:31You lied
17:41Wow
17:43This mini golf course
17:44Actually looks pretty good
17:47I'm glad someone
17:49Is paying attention
17:50To what the wave's
17:51Trying to pull off
17:52Let's see the window spin
17:54Oh it doesn't actually spin
17:56Yeah
17:57No it's decorative
17:58Like the treadmill
17:59In mom and dad's bedroom
18:02Are you kidding me?
18:04A crummy cake
18:05And a non-spinny windmill?
18:08Linda's trying to recreate
18:10The mini golf parties
18:11Of Matty's youth
18:12And if we're gonna do this
18:13We're gonna do this right
18:15I guess
18:16We could take apart
18:17One of my remote
18:18Controlled cars
18:19And use the motor
18:20From that to make it spin
18:21Yeah we could do that
18:23We can also play
18:24Duck, duck, goose
18:25Am I the only one
18:25That cares?
18:30We could take apart
18:31The riding mower
18:32And use the motor
18:33From that bad boy
18:34Now we're talking
18:37Birthday magic
18:38Monkeys
18:39Let's go
18:40Let's go
18:42Where are you going?
18:44It's already two hours
18:46Past my bedtime
18:47If I don't take a nap
18:48Before the party
18:49I'm gonna be a real
18:50Cranky Pants
18:56Good job
18:57Staines
18:57I have never been
18:59More impressed
19:00Or disgusted
19:04And you know
19:05You didn't have to
19:06Eat the bones
19:07To win the shirt
19:08Right?
19:09When I commit
19:10I commit man
19:13Here's your birthday
19:15Little lady
19:18It's not my actual
19:19Birthday till midnight
19:20Well blow off the camp
19:21It's somebody's birthday
19:26Go ahead Maddie
19:27Make a wish
19:29Guys I can't
19:31Sheriff Tim was right
19:33It is somebody's birthday
19:35It's Liz
19:36And the only wish
19:38That popped into my head
19:39Was that
19:39I wish we were
19:41Blowing out our candles
19:42Together so
19:43That's so sweet
19:44Let's get you home
19:45Right now
19:52Get up
19:54Are you sure?
19:56We've barely been here
19:58For four hours
20:00You are under arrest
20:02Candle rust
20:03Wait
20:04You're arresting
20:05The wrong bandit
20:06This girl here
20:07She's the cattle rust
20:08Yeah man
20:09Lock her up
20:10Lock her up
20:12Lock her up
20:14Lock her up
20:16Guys
20:16Guys
20:18Let me out
20:19I need to get to
20:20Liz's party
20:21Before it's over
20:22Good move Diggy
20:23I'm smooth
20:25Under pressure
20:26There's a new
20:28Sheriff in town
20:29And his name is
20:30Diggy
20:30And he's the
20:31Me to share
20:32On her
20:36We're out of here
20:39Maddie wait
20:47Mr. and Mrs.
20:49Joey and Willow Rooney
20:56It's midnight
20:58Seriously Diggy
20:59Sixteen wrong turns
21:04I've never heard of that law
21:05That says you have to go
21:06Five miles an hour
21:07Past a graveyard
21:09That's just showing
21:10Respect man
21:14Wait a second
21:15I don't hear music
21:16And the red carpet
21:17Is rolled up
21:18You guys
21:19I missed Liv's birthday
21:26Upper was really great
21:29At the hoose cow
21:33Where is everybody
21:44We missed saying surprise
21:46Are you kidding me
21:53Happy sweet sixteen
21:54Maddie
21:55Wait this is all
21:56For me
21:58Where's your
21:58Red carpet party
21:59Oh
22:00There was no party
22:02I totally
22:03Played you
22:03Don't feel bad though
22:04I am a
22:05Day older
22:11Hey
22:12Remember us
22:13The people you were
22:14Screaming at
22:15The whole way
22:16Past the graveyard
22:18You guys were all
22:19In on this
22:22Liv
22:24Mini golf
22:25This is just like
22:26Old times
22:28We got so wrapped up
22:29In which kind of party
22:30We each wanted
22:31That we forgot
22:32The best part
22:33Is doing it together
22:36Someone made you
22:37A cake
22:41Guys
22:42A basketball cake
22:43This is amazing
22:45This is amazing
22:46Sixteen layers of buttercream
22:48And guilt
22:48Mama's done her time
22:50We're moving on
22:53Now the Rooney girls
22:54Are ready to get there
22:55A party on
22:56A party on
22:59A party on
23:01A party on
23:02A party on
23:02A party on
23:03A party on
23:13I want to change
23:14Your number
23:18So Liv
23:19Come over
23:19These candles
23:21Okay one sec
23:22I want to get
23:22A video of this
23:23I think I left
23:24My phone in the garage
23:24When I was grabbing
23:25Decorations
23:28Video
23:29Then we've got
23:30To have the windmill going
23:31Dad
23:32Turn it on
23:37Guys
23:44I love it
23:45We did a good thing
23:46Today boys
23:47See what happens
23:49When you listen to Parker
23:56That thing kicks up
23:58Light a breeze
24:07Oh no
24:08The cake
24:14We have to turn this thing off
24:18Don't worry birthday girl
24:20Your hero's here
24:37Hey superhero
24:38Slug's right here
24:59Nice work on the cake mom
25:08Hey Parker
25:09Check it out
25:10Liv got us a present
25:11For helping out
25:12With the party
25:13It's nice to be appreciated
25:19Surprise
25:25Dude that was awesome
25:26Nice work pretzel butt
25:28Uptown
25:32Hey can you fit
25:33My underwear drawer
25:34I want to freak out
25:35My mom
25:36Follow me
25:37How about
25:38I want to freak out
25:39My son
25:41He's so
25:43Ochunda
25:43Amen.
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