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Transcript
00:00:25Jesus, Mom, can you at least warn me when you're going to do that?
00:00:30please oh please don't be such a child do you still have the wand of light
00:00:45see the all-powerful magic heirloom still safe and sound no you should be more careful
00:00:51the wand of light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires yeah and if it falls into
00:00:58the wrong hands it would become the most dangerous weapon in the world but a marriage to another
00:01:05noble witch family would only strengthen your power yeah less than evil Svensson right
00:01:12the Svensons are our worst enemies Leona do you know how much our family has suffered over the
00:01:18centuries because of them I know sorry you are the guardian of the wand of light Leona and you
00:01:27can't reach your full potential until you marry and succeed me as head of the family come home
00:01:34with a husband next week or I will pick one for you what mom no please don't Leona Sherwood you
00:01:41are
00:01:42getting married whether you like the boy I pick or not mom understand
00:01:49don't worry mom I'm the responsible daughter remember
00:02:01okay Leona Sherwood this is your last weekend of freedom
00:02:09for two more nights
00:02:10you guys fuck my responsibility I'm gonna have some fun
00:02:27thank you that would be 25 dollars
00:02:31I think you mean it's on the house right right it's on the house
00:02:57there you are little Miss Sherwood
00:03:06where the hell are you I'm in Vegas like I said it would be old man
00:03:09hey don't you get smart with me you little
00:03:11shit remember your mission seduce the Sherwood heir and marry her and then that whole obnoxious
00:03:18family will be there to pay off our debts you mean your debts
00:03:22quiet it's bad enough that I have a sorry excuse for an heir you are an embarrassment to the
00:03:28Spence in name now if you don't marry the Sherwood girl like I told you I am going to sell
00:03:34your
00:03:35little sister off to old Fitzgerald to be his fourth wife
00:03:39dad secret is just a kid when I want your opinion I will ask for it until then you shut
00:03:45up and do
00:03:46as I say do you understand yeah I understand good and you keep practicing you sound god-awful
00:03:57it's the heartless fucking bastard
00:04:13it's two of us
00:04:15you're saying you don't remember me
00:04:17who remembers shipping in his dumb teens anyways
00:04:20no way
00:04:21totally
00:04:22I love that show
00:04:23I watched it in one sitting at like 2am
00:04:26this is one of my favorites
00:04:27it definitely doesn't get the love that it deserves
00:04:29but I think it's one of the best ones
00:04:31really
00:04:33I never begged you for a sappy romance kind of guy
00:04:38looks can be deceiving
00:04:44the wand of light
00:04:46so it does exist
00:04:48maybe I'm just jaded
00:04:50it's hard to believe that love like that actually exists in real life
00:04:53why not we're witches monsters and magic exist in our world
00:04:58why can't true love
00:05:01I am lily by the way
00:05:04lily collins
00:05:08eric phillips
00:05:09nice to meet you lily collins
00:05:12damn he's hot
00:05:13and I'm in vegas
00:05:15I deserve a little fun
00:05:16well eric phillips
00:05:19I'll be in the poker room tonight
00:05:21maybe I'll see you there
00:05:22maybe
00:05:26I'll be in the poker room tonight
00:05:42okay Svinson
00:05:44don't fuck this up
00:05:45don't fuck this up
00:05:59Eric motherfucking Svinson
00:06:01excuse me
00:06:01you ghost me for three months after sleeping with me
00:06:04and you think you can sit there and act like nothing happened
00:06:07I think you've got me confused with someone else
00:06:09don't gaslight me Svinson
00:06:11I know exactly who you are
00:06:26you know who she is
00:06:28I think she's got me confused with someone else
00:06:35thank you
00:06:43you nervous
00:06:44not at all
00:06:47you can always fold you know
00:06:49I'd hate to send you home empty-handed
00:06:53not a chance
00:06:55I'm here to win
00:06:57you sure
00:06:58seems like your focus is somewhere else
00:07:01oh
00:07:02I am
00:07:04very focused
00:07:07are you guys done making good eyes at each other or what
00:07:12you're full of
00:07:13you're full of shit Phillips
00:07:13I call
00:07:15yeah there is no way that you have this
00:07:18but don't worry
00:07:20I'll let you go another round
00:07:22once I beat you
00:07:23actually
00:07:24I think I'm about to hit the jackpot
00:07:29Eric
00:07:50I've wanted to do that
00:07:51since I saw you by the pool in your bikini
00:07:53Eric
00:07:54everyone can see
00:07:56do you want me to stop
00:08:12let's see
00:08:13let him watch
00:08:16give him a show
00:08:28wait please don't stop
00:08:31use your words
00:08:33tell me what you want
00:08:34I want your tongue inside me
00:08:37please
00:08:38that's a good girl
00:08:41oh
00:08:45Eric
00:08:49wait
00:08:49wait
00:08:50wait
00:08:50I think I'm gonna
00:08:53was that some kind of vision
00:08:58no
00:08:59that was from him
00:09:08lucky son of a
00:09:10bitch
00:09:10beginner lux
00:09:12let's see you do it again next hand
00:09:14no can do
00:09:16I have a date with a
00:09:18very pretty lady
00:09:24why do I have the feeling that you're not exactly as you present
00:09:28Eric
00:09:29Phillips
00:09:31it is
00:09:31it is Vegas
00:09:33isn't that part of the fun
00:09:46what do I have the feeling that you're not going to do it again next time
00:09:47it wasn't very nice of you
00:09:49to tease me with your strap of your dress during our game
00:09:52hmm
00:09:53it's very distracting
00:09:57well you know it wasn't very nice of you
00:10:00to send me that little vision during our game
00:10:03I just wanted to give you a little sneak preview
00:10:13Eric there are people
00:10:15and if you're quiet
00:10:17they won't see you
00:10:21I should stop
00:10:22this wasn't how the plan was supposed to go
00:10:24you knew you were right before
00:10:26I'm not who I say I am
00:10:28and who out there is exactly as they present
00:10:32but I am
00:10:33look I don't care who you are outside of this
00:10:36for once in my life I
00:10:39I just want to forget about everything
00:10:42just live in the moment
00:10:44and I think you
00:10:47can help me do that
00:10:55remove the camouflage
00:10:57I want you to see you
00:10:59the real you
00:11:02but then you'll know who I am
00:11:04I already know who you are
00:11:07the real you
00:11:09wants to let go
00:11:15no one's ever looked at me like that
00:11:18he really wants me
00:11:20the real me
00:11:21fuck
00:11:23you are gorgeous
00:11:27i want you eric
00:11:30i need you
00:11:35spread your legs for me
00:11:41keep your eyes open
00:11:44i want you to watch yourself
00:11:46come
00:11:47come all over my fingers
00:11:53keep your eyes open
00:11:59i thought you said that they couldn't hear me
00:12:02they can if you stay quiet
00:12:04keep your eyes open
00:12:05or i'll stop
00:12:10that's a good girl
00:12:12that's a good girl
00:12:13went down in my head
00:12:18oh my god they hurt me
00:12:21i can't
00:12:23just relax
00:12:24i can't eric
00:12:41i can't wait to put my mouth on you
00:12:53i can't wait to put my mouth on you
00:12:57go
00:12:57five
00:12:58one
00:13:00four
00:13:02four
00:13:07four
00:13:28I can't believe I just came on his hand in front of other people.
00:13:33I think this is your floor.
00:13:41I'll be at the fountain tomorrow at 8 o'clock.
00:13:45If you decide that you want more.
00:13:47See you there.
00:13:58How did he know what floor I was on?
00:14:05So you've told me all about your wild sister and the things that she's done.
00:14:11What about you?
00:14:15I'm the responsible sister.
00:14:17The boring one, if you will.
00:14:20And I do what I'm supposed to do.
00:14:22Follow the rules and all that good stuff.
00:14:25I don't believe you.
00:14:26I do. I mean, I know how you are in an elevator.
00:14:29Oh, come on.
00:14:32Come on.
00:14:34It's Vegas.
00:14:35Let me be your bad influence.
00:14:37Just for tonight.
00:14:41So, any bad ideas?
00:14:47Just one.
00:14:54What are you doing?
00:15:12No games.
00:15:13Just fuck me already.
00:15:15I thought I would try to woo you first.
00:15:16Consider me wooed.
00:15:18Then we could take it slow?
00:15:19Oh, your lips say one thing.
00:15:21But your body says something else.
00:15:35Wait.
00:15:37Shit.
00:15:39I almost lost my cool.
00:15:40I gotta remember the plan.
00:15:44Oh, my God.
00:15:45I can't believe I just did that.
00:15:47That was so embarrassing.
00:15:48This is why I don't do crazy shit.
00:15:50That was way too much.
00:15:51Hey.
00:15:52You're never too much.
00:15:54You don't understand, Eric.
00:15:56Okay, if my family saw me do any of that, they would freak out.
00:15:59Tonight's not about your family.
00:16:01Tonight's about you.
00:16:02Remember?
00:16:03Forget what everyone else has told you to do.
00:16:06Do something that you want to do.
00:16:08Something no one would expect.
00:16:10Maybe he's right.
00:16:12I've spent my whole life doing what my family's told me to do.
00:16:18For once in my life, I'm doing something for myself.
00:16:22She spotted the chapel.
00:16:25Just like I planned.
00:16:29So, are you, uh, you sure about this marriage thing?
00:16:32It's only temporary.
00:16:34Okay, and old magic is weak.
00:16:35The hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning.
00:16:39So, are you ready for a holy matrimony?
00:16:42I'm ready if you're ready.
00:16:45Come on.
00:16:49Let's go.
00:16:55You're nervous?
00:16:58Just, never been married before.
00:17:07Uh, it's my sister.
00:17:08I need to take this.
00:17:09Oh, yeah, take your time.
00:17:11Elvis here wants me to pick out a hand fast bouquet.
00:17:14Hey, mama, let's get some flowers for you.
00:17:15Come on.
00:17:15Let's do it.
00:17:17You need to come home, now.
00:17:19I can't, secret.
00:17:21Eric, Dad's up to something.
00:17:22He invited Fitzgerald to the house and made me dress up.
00:17:26He looks at me weird.
00:17:27It really freaks me out.
00:17:28You were my big brother, E.
00:17:30I need you here.
00:17:32Listen, I can't leave right now, but I promise when I come home, I'll have enough power to
00:17:36get rid of Dad forever, okay?
00:17:41Hey.
00:17:43Is everything okay?
00:17:45Yeah.
00:17:48Yeah, it's fine.
00:17:51You, uh, you sure about this?
00:17:54It's only temporary.
00:17:56Come on, we'll be laughing about this for years.
00:18:02Let's go.
00:18:18Right, only temporary.
00:18:20Unless you get hand fasted under a full moon, then the hand fast bond is nearly unbreakable.
00:18:26But she doesn't know that.
00:18:27And once she does, she'll hate me.
00:18:31Is your sister okay?
00:18:33Is something wrong?
00:18:36Nothing's wrong.
00:18:37We're about to get married in Vegas by Ovis.
00:18:40What could possibly be wrong?
00:18:43All right, you ready to rock and roll, you hunk-a-hunk-a-hot couple?
00:18:47Let's get this show started.
00:18:49Woo!
00:18:50Woo!
00:18:51Woo!
00:19:16This is it.
00:19:18I have the wand of light.
00:19:20The most powerful object in the world.
00:19:23If I leave now, I could use it to take control away from my father.
00:19:27Set Sigrid and I free.
00:19:35But I already betrayed her once.
00:19:53Okay.
00:20:19Off to get more chocolate strawberries, be back soon.
00:20:32It's only temporary, okay, and old magic is weak, the hand fast bond will probably only
00:20:37last till the morning.
00:20:38Hmm, that's weird.
00:20:41The mark should have worn off by now.
00:20:51So, did you marry the girl yet?
00:20:56No, it's complicated.
00:21:00Complicated?
00:21:01Or distracted?
00:21:03You were sent there to marry the Sherwood heir and bind her power to this family, not to
00:21:09play house.
00:21:10You're a Svensson.
00:21:11Act like one.
00:21:12Eric is a Svensson?
00:21:16I married my family's worst enemy?
00:21:18I don't need you to tell me what I am.
00:21:21Then stop hesitating.
00:21:23If the rumors about the wand of light are true, we might catch an even bigger prize.
00:21:27So hurry up and marry the Sherwood girl and then bring her to me, idiot.
00:21:42He's been lying this whole time.
00:21:49I need to tell her the truth.
00:21:53You lying piece of troll shit!
00:21:56You didn't want me, you just wanted the fucking wand, didn't you?
00:22:01I didn't even know the wand existed until I met you.
00:22:03You still lied to me, Eric.
00:22:05You knew I was a Sherwood from the start.
00:22:07That's why you gave me a fake fucking name, right?
00:22:09Okay, I did, but that was before we-
00:22:11Why before?
00:22:11Before you decided to mess with me?
00:22:13Get your dick wet before you ruin me and my family forever?
00:22:17I'm not trying to ruin your family, I'm trying to save mine!
00:22:19No!
00:22:20I know all about you, Spinsons!
00:22:22All you do is lie and cheat and steal to get whatever you fucking want!
00:22:27I should have caught it at the poker table, but your little tricks won't work on me this time.
00:22:32The hand fast mark, it'll fade!
00:22:35Just like you, just like whatever this was!
00:22:38The hand fast wasn't a trick.
00:22:39Not that part.
00:22:41Not with you.
00:22:43It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:22:45You will never, ever get the wand!
00:22:49Lili, what?
00:22:51When this fades, Eric, I will never have to see you again!
00:23:08So, that didn't happen.
00:23:12My older sister Effie told me that the mark would fade a week later.
00:23:17Then a month went by...
00:23:19Then...
00:23:21Well...
00:23:25See, this is why you don't fuck with old magic.
00:23:28It's all fun and games till there's a full moon.
00:23:30Then it's the most powerful magic in the universe.
00:23:37Apparently, getting hand fast married under a full moon creates a bond that's almost unbreakable.
00:23:44Also, apparently, the almost part means that both people have to perform the divorce spell.
00:23:51I tried calling, texting, sending flying monkeys.
00:23:57Nothing.
00:23:58Not a single word from my beloved husband for half a year.
00:24:12Yes, I still sleep with a wand under my pillow.
00:24:16The emotional ass whooping I got from my mother for getting hand fasted to a stranger was bad enough.
00:24:21No one can ever find out that I almost lost the wand too.
00:24:26I just need one night...
00:24:28To sleep without...
00:24:30Thinking about him.
00:24:54Who are you?
00:24:55What do you want with the wand of light?
00:24:58Nothing.
00:24:59I'm just here to collect my payday from my client once I bring him that wand.
00:25:04Payday?
00:25:06Someone sent you!
00:25:07Who?
00:25:08I'm afraid I can't break client confidentiality.
00:25:10Sorry, sweetie.
00:25:13Well, I'm afraid that you chose the wrong witch to fuck with tonight.
00:25:29Be wise not to fight back, witch.
00:25:31You're in over your head.
00:25:34I'd rather die than let you take the wand!
00:25:39Suit yourself.
00:25:44Suit yourself.
00:25:46Wait.
00:25:53What the fuck?
00:26:04Boop!
00:26:05What co- ั€ะฐะฝu do...
00:26:08We're a murderer now.
00:26:08Look out!
00:26:09I Wherever you're at the blind!
00:26:11I reka' am.
00:26:12Pull this!
00:26:14She repertoire is Glass.
00:26:14Thanks!
00:26:15I ashamed to make serio sangre.
00:26:20You are the reason I lost the wand.
00:26:23Who are you?
00:26:29The hand fast mark.
00:26:34Hello, wife.
00:26:35Miss me?
00:26:39What are you doing here?
00:26:41Well, you know, I thought I'd spice up our marriage,
00:26:44do a little role-playing,
00:26:44but it looks like you're more into bondage.
00:26:47I didn't know you were so kinky.
00:26:48Shut up!
00:26:52You should be thanking me.
00:26:54I did just save your home.
00:26:55Thanking you?
00:26:56You're the reason my family's most powerful heirloom is gone.
00:26:59How did you even find me?
00:27:02Wait a minute.
00:27:04You were trying to steal the wand, too, weren't you?
00:27:07Maybe.
00:27:09God, you slimy, tote-faced motherfucker!
00:27:13Okay, first you tricked me into marrying you,
00:27:15then you ghost me for six months,
00:27:17and now you come in here like a goddamn fucking cartoon burglar
00:27:21and try to take my wand!
00:27:23Look, I was just gonna borrow it.
00:27:25Yeah, for one of your dirty, no-good-spenton schemes?
00:27:28I-I just-I need it, okay?
00:27:31It's-it's the only way that we can be free.
00:27:35Look, my dad doesn't know about our marriage.
00:27:38Not yet.
00:27:39But he knows about the wand.
00:27:40If he gets a hold of it,
00:27:41he's gonna sell it to the highest bidder.
00:27:43Whoever controls the wand has the power to take over the world.
00:27:46Or worse.
00:27:47No!
00:27:48Worse than tricking me into marrying you?
00:27:50I told you that that wasn't a trick.
00:27:52It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:27:54She has the wand, that shadow thief or whatever.
00:27:58And that's your fault!
00:27:59I can get it back.
00:28:02Look, I know I don't deserve it.
00:28:03But just give me one more chance.
00:28:06I can get the wand back,
00:28:08take care of what I need to take care of,
00:28:09and then I'll do the divorce spell.
00:28:12Please, Lily, just give me one more chance.
00:28:14Please.
00:28:15I can't trust him.
00:28:17I shouldn't.
00:28:19But my gut tells me,
00:28:21this time,
00:28:23it might be different.
00:28:29No.
00:28:31No, we're both gonna go get it.
00:28:34It is my job as a Sherwood heir
00:28:36to set things right,
00:28:37so I don't let the wand fall into the wrong hands.
00:28:41And you really think after Vegas,
00:28:42I would let you go alone
00:28:43to find the most powerful, magical object
00:28:46in the entire world?
00:28:48Fair.
00:28:49Whatever you want.
00:28:50Lily.
00:28:52God, I hate when you call me that.
00:28:54All right.
00:28:55I'll call you wife.
00:28:57And you can call me whatever you want.
00:29:00Eric, husband, daddy.
00:29:02Shut up!
00:29:03Don't call me wife either.
00:29:05After we get this wand,
00:29:06we will do the divorce spell.
00:29:07Got it?
00:29:08You're breaking my heart.
00:29:09I mean, you're the better half of my soul.
00:29:12Yeah.
00:29:13You're not gonna sweet-talk your way
00:29:14into my pants again, Eric.
00:29:16We'll see.
00:29:22Now, the wand forbids a direct tracking spell,
00:29:24so we have to track its trail.
00:29:27That's a ten-mile radius.
00:29:29We'll never find a wand inside that circle.
00:29:31Well, with the tracking spell,
00:29:32I get a location, okay?
00:29:34It doesn't last long, though.
00:29:36We'll have like three or four days.
00:29:37Well, lucky for you.
00:29:39I already packed your bags.
00:29:42Consider it our official honeymoon.
00:29:48Aja, this, we're done.
00:29:49You got it?
00:29:50Don't go back on your words, Benson.
00:29:52We will do the divorce spell.
00:29:54Cross my heart.
00:29:56Hope to die.
00:30:15You imagined a car here?
00:30:17This isn't just any car.
00:30:25This is Bessie.
00:30:27You really expect us to track down
00:30:29the most powerful, magical object in the world?
00:30:32In a car without a roof?
00:30:34I mean, if you're not comfortable,
00:30:40I could go by myself.
00:30:43If you trust me, not throw it away.
00:30:45Hmm.
00:30:46I wouldn't trust you
00:30:47with a half-eaten newt muffin.
00:30:49I was going to throw in the trash.
00:30:53Then your chariot awaits, wife.
00:31:15Well, you've been driving all day,
00:31:17and she hasn't said a single word.
00:31:30You're Svensson.
00:31:32You don't play house with sheriffs.
00:31:33Wait, why are we turning?
00:31:35We don't have any time.
00:31:36We have to find the wand, Eric.
00:31:39That circle is getting further and further away.
00:31:42Plus, it's getting dark.
00:31:43We need to stay somewhere for the night.
00:31:44Why don't you just let me drive?
00:31:45Because you haven't slept either.
00:31:47Plus, no one can drive Bessie but me.
00:31:51What is with guys and cars?
00:31:53Jesus.
00:31:53No, I mean literally,
00:31:55no one else can drive Bessie.
00:31:57My great-great-grandfather
00:31:58put a hex on all of our possessions.
00:32:00Anyone that's non-blood-related
00:32:02can't touch it.
00:32:03The Svensson's like to hoard their treasures.
00:32:06Your family has issues.
00:32:08Finally.
00:32:09Something we can agree on.
00:32:11Was this your plan all along?
00:32:13Make me feel bad for you
00:32:14because your family's evil,
00:32:15so I get all ooey-gooey
00:32:17and forget about the divorce?
00:32:18Not everyone in my family is evil.
00:32:21Yeah.
00:32:22Okay.
00:32:35You cross this wall
00:32:36or do anything to piss me off
00:32:38more than you already have,
00:32:39then you do not even want to imagine
00:32:41the hex I'm going to put on you.
00:32:48I promise,
00:32:49no funny business.
00:32:52Peak your promise.
00:33:12good night to you, too.
00:33:28In Vegas,
00:33:30you said you had a sister, right?
00:33:38She didn't ask her to be a Svensson.
00:33:41She's different than us.
00:33:43Better.
00:33:45Not like you?
00:33:46No.
00:33:49Not like me.
00:33:50But you already know that.
00:33:51No.
00:33:54Yeah.
00:34:18It's not like me.
00:34:21I'm so maggoth.
00:34:21My teacher.
00:34:43Good morning, wife.
00:34:46I told you not to come.
00:35:04You were saying, Silver, what?
00:35:10How did you know I was awake?
00:35:13The husband always knows.
00:35:14Hmm.
00:35:21Well, if you don't mind, I'm gonna shower.
00:35:27No peeking.
00:35:32Cross my heart.
00:35:34Hope to die.
00:35:42I need to get a grip.
00:35:45Some washboard ads and a cocky grin aren't enough to make me fall for him.
00:35:49I just need this one time to take the edge off.
00:36:02I remember he touched me like this in Vegas.
00:36:18Look, I'm so close.
00:36:25That's it, Lily.
00:36:27Lily, are you a good girl and go for me?
00:36:37Are you ready?
00:36:41Oh, Eric.
00:36:57You said that you wouldn't look.
00:37:01I don't need to look to know what you were doing while thinking about me.
00:37:07God, you are so full of yourself.
00:37:09Do I know what I heard?
00:37:11Say another word and I'll turn you into a frog.
00:37:17Were you thinking about that time in Vegas where I ate you out in the shower and you came
00:37:24so hard, you almost crushed my skull between your thighs.
00:37:29I think about those times a lot.
00:37:32Yeah, well, I don't think about them at all.
00:37:59You still haven't even told me what you won't go on for yet.
00:38:02It's on a need to know basis.
00:38:05Oh, don't you think I need to know?
00:38:08I am your wife after all.
00:38:10Oh, now you remember you're my wife.
00:38:13Funny how you only remember that when it's convenient for you.
00:38:15I remember every time I think about how badly I fucked up in Vegas.
00:38:19So all I am is a mistake.
00:38:20If I remember right, you're the one that suggested that we get hand fast married.
00:38:24Obviously that was before I knew about all your bullshit and lies.
00:38:29Duty and responsibility might not be a big deal in your family, but in mine, it's huge.
00:38:34See, there you go again.
00:38:36Always worried about what your family wants.
00:38:38It's never about what you want.
00:38:39I follow the rules because I have to, Eric.
00:38:42If I don't, I end up in situations like this.
00:38:45Did you ever stop to think that maybe that's unfair?
00:38:48That maybe your ideas and their ideas are bullshit?
00:38:52You ever think of that?
00:38:54Spoken like a true Svensson.
00:38:56Well, you're a Svensson too, sweetheart.
00:38:58Not much longer, I can tell you that.
00:39:19I want to get some coffee.
00:39:21It's getting dark.
00:39:21You really think you should be alone?
00:39:23So now that we're married, you think you have to babysit me too?
00:39:30Fine.
00:39:31Just don't take too long.
00:39:35You got her in the car or what?
00:39:37Who?
00:39:38Don't play done with me, boy.
00:39:40The little Sherwood witch you married forgot to tell me about.
00:39:46You thought I wouldn't find out, huh?
00:39:48You did a good job of hiding it, I'll give you that.
00:39:51Maybe you are my son after all, huh?
00:39:54What's the end game here?
00:39:56You said you just needed to get the Sherwood's wand so you could pay off your debts.
00:39:59What does she have to do with it?
00:40:00Because I'm not an idiot like you.
00:40:03I'll finally have all the leverage I need over the Sherwood family.
00:40:07When I tell them their pretty little heir is my new daughter-in-law.
00:40:12And then it'll be our family that gets to call the shots in the magic world.
00:40:16So you just want to use her like you use mom?
00:40:19Like you're using your own daughter.
00:40:21This is not a request, boy.
00:40:24Bring the girl and the wand to me or you will be stripped of your name.
00:40:28Your magic, everything.
00:40:30And your sister, she'll be the one paying the price for your mistakes.
00:40:44This isn't right, the trail should still be here.
00:40:48Would you like some coffee, Miss Sherwood?
00:40:50Yeah, thank you.
00:40:52Wait, how did you know my...
00:40:54You.
00:40:58But the map said that...
00:41:00That's cute.
00:41:02You think that dusty old map could track me?
00:41:09That wand is mine.
00:41:14Not anymore, it's not.
00:41:15And sadly, my employers need your powers too.
00:41:19Employer?
00:41:22Hold still.
00:41:23This will only hurt a bit.
00:41:25No, stop!
00:41:26Stop!
00:41:34Get away from her!
00:41:38Eric!
00:41:40Eric, the wand!
00:41:54My magic...
00:41:55She took half of my magic, Eric!
00:41:57You're okay.
00:41:58I got you.
00:41:59You're okay.
00:42:00You're okay.
00:42:03I don't understand.
00:42:05The map said that the wand was miles away.
00:42:08What did she want with my powers?
00:42:10Thief must have found some way to bypass the tracking spell.
00:42:13She can't have gone far.
00:42:14We'll find her.
00:42:15Lay low for now.
00:42:16Eric, stop the car!
00:42:17I can't breathe!
00:42:19Okay.
00:42:29Hey, hey, hey!
00:42:31Look at me.
00:42:31Look at me.
00:42:32Look at me.
00:42:32You're okay.
00:42:32You're okay.
00:42:33Just breathe.
00:42:34I got you.
00:42:36You're safe.
00:42:37I...
00:42:38I thought she was gonna kill me, Eric.
00:42:41I'm not gonna let that happen.
00:42:43Not while I'm breathing.
00:42:57I still hate you.
00:43:01If you hated me, you wouldn't let me touch you like this.
00:43:05This doesn't change anything.
00:43:08It's only scratching an itch.
00:43:10Once we get the wand, and we do the divorce spell, and we forget each other existed.
00:43:21Is that what you want, Lily?
00:43:23You wanna forget how good I make you feel?
00:43:26You wanna forget I'm the only person in the whole fucking world who can make you feel this way?
00:43:37Eric...
00:43:39Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:43:47We can't do this.
00:43:50This is what goes wrong between us.
00:43:52We can't make that mistake again.
00:43:54We have a job to do, Eric.
00:43:56Let's get the wand.
00:43:58That's it.
00:43:59And then what?
00:44:01You know what happens after, Eric.
00:44:03Eric.
00:44:04We do the divorce spell.
00:44:05And we never see each other again.
00:44:24You know what happens after, Eric.
00:44:28It's not as good as he knew it.
00:44:28I'm not friends, but I'm a ะ– Harry.
00:44:28I'm not being a kid.
00:44:30I'm the only one who wants to do it.
00:44:34If I'm not being a kid, I'm not being a kid.
00:44:39It smells like fresh baked pastries, cinnamon, old magic.
00:44:48I should have known.
00:44:51It's a Satyr's Inn.
00:44:53That smell.
00:44:55Noman-inhabitus smell.
00:44:57It's woven into places like this for couples.
00:45:02Human orgies.
00:45:05Satyr's are the horniest bastards in the known world.
00:45:08It lowers any fear, doubt, shame, grits of your deepest desires.
00:45:16Without any fear of judgment or consequences.
00:45:28You don't.
00:45:31I'm trying not to.
00:45:41You don't.
00:45:44I'm trying not to.
00:45:51The spell doesn't create desire.
00:45:54It lets go of the lies.
00:45:57It tells us what we really want.
00:45:59What I want doesn't matter.
00:46:02It matters in here.
00:46:05Tell me what you really want.
00:46:07You can say goodbye.
00:46:09And go our separate ways.
00:46:11Or you can tell me you want this.
00:46:15You want me.
00:46:18Tell me to stay.
00:46:22Stay here.
00:46:24Please.
00:46:25God, what is this?
00:46:27Is this just the magic?
00:46:29No.
00:46:32It's not the spell.
00:46:34It's freedom.
00:46:35No.
00:46:37You can hear the outside world.
00:46:39It doesn't matter.
00:46:40Just you.
00:46:41And me.
00:46:43I shouldn't want this.
00:46:46I shouldn't want this.
00:46:48I shouldn't be doing this.
00:46:53Or this.
00:46:55To be able to share with you.
00:46:58To the most respected family of the whole rich world.
00:47:02You definitely shouldn't sound this fucking sexy.
00:47:05To mind.
00:47:07You're with the ear.
00:47:09To the Sherwood family.
00:47:12Who are you?
00:47:13I want you, Eric.
00:47:16I need you.
00:47:20Tell me who you are.
00:47:23Lily.
00:47:25Close.
00:47:29But not quite.
00:47:32Tonight.
00:47:33Tell me who you are.
00:47:36Your wife.
00:48:01This doesn't change anything.
00:48:03I know.
00:48:05We can have tonight.
00:48:06And then tomorrow we go back to who we are on the outside.
00:48:10Sure.
00:48:11I'll go back to being my bad self.
00:48:13And you can go back to pretending to be a good little witch.
00:48:17Excuse me?
00:48:18Don't deny.
00:48:19Lily.
00:48:20Sherwood.
00:48:21I know I'm kind of dork.
00:48:23Naughty thoughts you have.
00:48:26I don't.
00:48:28It's okay to be bad.
00:48:31You don't have to pretend.
00:48:34I don't, huh?
00:48:39You know.
00:48:40You know just because I have half my magic doesn't mean I can't play with you for tonight.
00:48:54No you're gonna sit there.
00:48:58Like a good.
00:49:00Little.
00:49:01Witch.
00:49:06and i'm gonna do whatever i want to you
00:49:18i don't remember packing that lingerie close your eyes
00:49:25eric you're so good for being such a bad boy
00:49:32i'm being properly motivated not to move
00:49:38see how long it takes you to break
00:49:41for you i could stay here forever
00:49:43pretty to think so why don't we test that little theory
00:49:48we're playing a dangerous game
00:49:52all you have to do is admit that i win
00:49:57i'll let you fuck me i'll even let you come wherever
00:50:03you want
00:50:06you can come here
00:50:09or here
00:50:13i'll even
00:50:15let you come in here
00:50:17god
00:50:19come on
00:50:21i know you wanna
00:50:22just admit i'm right
00:50:27fine
00:50:29you win
00:50:30oh what was that
00:50:32you hurt me
00:50:43so what's my prize
00:50:48i could torture you like you did me
00:50:53but i wanna be inside you
00:50:55i wanna feel you squeeze me tight
00:50:59then take me to bed husband
00:51:04call me that again
00:51:08you want me to fuck you husband
00:51:10yeah
00:51:11fuck me
00:51:20tell me a story
00:51:24like the ones you did in vegas
00:51:27i've got a story about
00:51:29my pet goat gilmore
00:51:31and how he got stuck on a magic carpet
00:51:34or this story about how my sister tried to negotiate with a troll
00:51:39using only red images
00:51:40i already know about your family
00:51:47i wanna know about you
00:51:50what's it like to be a svensson heir
00:51:52you want the insider info
00:51:54mmm
00:51:56you tell me yours i'll tell you mine
00:51:58you gonna tell me how wonderful it was
00:52:01growing up as a beloved and blessed sherwood
00:52:07is that what you think being a sherwood is like
00:52:11is that what you think being a sherwood is like
00:52:13all fun and rainbows
00:52:16yeah everybody loves your family
00:52:17that's not true eric
00:52:20there are so many people who would love it if we just disappeared
00:52:23my mother has been shouldering all that responsibility and pressure for decades
00:52:27and next year i will be the head witch in charge
00:52:32everyone's counting on me to do the right thing
00:52:33like eat your fruits and veggies
00:52:35like spending my whole childhood being told that the whole world depended on me
00:52:41like never bothering to have any hopes or dreams
00:52:45because my whole life was planned for me from the very start before i was even born
00:52:50i'm always doing the right thing for the family
00:52:52i was never allowed to even think of doing the wrong thing
00:52:56i couldn't be tired i couldn't be scared i couldn't be angry
00:53:00one mistake and my family loses everything that they've ever worked for
00:53:04if this whole world fades to black it's because i messed up
00:53:08it's because i didn't do a good job
00:53:13i don't think i've ever said that out loud before
00:53:16i'm glad you did
00:53:19your turn
00:53:21growing up as vincent was
00:53:24a little different
00:53:26the old man likes to say i was
00:53:29the first of his disappointments
00:53:31i guess it's good
00:53:33at least i was first in something
00:53:36i didn't care about disappointing him
00:53:38i just wanted to get away from him
00:53:41i had it all planned out when
00:53:42i turned 16 i'd leave
00:53:45change my name and this vincent bloodline would die with me
00:53:48my mom died when secret was born
00:53:53my dad used her against me
00:53:56every day since
00:54:03i'm so sorry eric
00:54:04i shouldn't have asked
00:54:09it's okay
00:54:10those vincents have always lived in the sherwood shadows
00:54:14we are the shadows
00:54:18all you do is shine
00:54:30he always asks me what i want
00:54:34what do you want eric
00:54:39you'd hate me if i told you
00:54:41i mean
00:54:42more than you already do
00:54:46i don't hate you
00:54:49i never did
00:54:57you
00:55:11you
00:55:25Eric. Something's wrong. Dad's got visitors. A bunch of old guys. I don't know who they are.
00:55:31He made me play piano for them, like some kind of dress-up doll. It's like freaking me out.
00:55:42Eric. Are you safe?
00:55:48Eric. Are you safe?
00:55:50For now, all those weird old men lived last night. And I hexed my door so no one could get
00:55:58in.
00:55:58Don't let anyone in. If Dad tries to get you to play with any of those weird old men, just...
00:56:02I know. I'll just do what he says.
00:56:06I always do.
00:56:08I'm so sick of this E. What if he actually does make me marry one of those guys?
00:56:12I'm never going to let that happen, alright? Look, I'm close to getting the Wand of Light.
00:56:19The Wand of Light? Like, the one from the fairy tales?
00:56:24You can't tell Dad a secret. When I get the wand, be ready for my call. I have a plan.
00:56:31I barely know basic spells. I don't know if...
00:56:36You can. I know you can. When the time is right, you'll be ready.
00:57:08Filling up Bessie. Meet me downstairs when you're ready.
00:57:19oh my god why do you and mom always do that a bit high strung aren't you sis
00:57:27i was just in the middle of thinking yeah and going by your aura i can guess about who
00:57:32very much giving post-orgasmic afterglow oh yeah well you and your little aura reading
00:57:38can go jump in a lake oh aren't we feisty this morning your super hot hubby isn't around i'm
00:57:44guessing or have you already murdered him after catching his dick i know all the best places tied
00:57:49a body by the way i'm fine effie i know all about eric spenson i'm not stupid and when we
00:57:58get the
00:57:58wand back you mean if you get the wand back we will and when we do we'll do the divorce
00:58:05spell
00:58:06this mark will be gone i'll go home and marry the best person who serves our family alliance
00:58:16it's not fair you know i know i'm the last person who should be saying that because it's not like
00:58:21i could change it but it's not it's just the way it goes right there has to be a way
00:58:29for you to be
00:58:30with who you actually want and be a good heir effie what i want has nothing to do with anything
00:58:37in my
00:58:37life that's fine it's what it means to be a sure what just remember repeating it doesn't make it true
00:58:48all right whatever you say sis you know best i know give everyone a hug for me tell them i'll
00:58:58be back
00:58:58home soon
00:59:08last night was the last time after today we're done if i say that enough times
00:59:15maybe i'll finally believe it
00:59:26i'll tell you about my plan with the wand
00:59:30my family's magic is dying my father's been cashing in on broken promises for years
00:59:35but he holds most of the power and me and see we just get the scraps that's how he controls
00:59:40us
00:59:42if i could use the wand just once i can take his power away from the bread
00:59:47i'm not trying to ruin your family i'm trying to save mine it's the only way that we can be
00:59:52free
00:59:54that's what you meant by trying to save your family
00:59:58i was going to tell you the night before i was going to tell you the truth
01:00:02and then i was just going to ask if i could use the wand just once and then i would
01:00:06do whatever you
01:00:07get a divorce leave you alone forever why didn't you tell me
01:00:16why didn't you tell me that morning maybe things could have been different
01:00:21i would have asked you to stay
01:00:23it's a nice idea but our families have been at war since the beginning of time
01:00:30maybe if we were different people
01:00:33we have different lives
01:00:35this is what it works maybe we can
01:00:40maybe the wand has a spell for that eric
01:00:42a witch can hope
01:00:51what
01:00:53do i have mushrooms growing out of the side of my head
01:00:55why are you looking at me like that
01:01:09wait i'm driving
01:01:11pull over
01:01:31you have got to be kidding me
01:01:39end of the line witches
01:01:49no
01:01:51no
01:01:52no
01:01:52no
01:01:52no
01:01:53no
01:01:54no
01:01:54no
01:02:06no
01:02:10no
01:02:14no
01:02:15no
01:02:15no
01:02:15no
01:02:18no
01:02:19no
01:02:19no
01:02:20no
01:02:28now is not a good time old man
01:02:30well it sounds like my insurance policy worked
01:02:34you
01:02:35you would send the shadow thief
01:02:37Of course I sent her. Do you think I would trust you to finish the job?
01:02:53Demons are very expensive, you know?
01:02:57But I thought that the Sherwood girl's soul in exchange for the wand was a good enough bargain.
01:03:05Souls of magic users, apparently, taste better.
01:03:19You said you needed her alive. The Sherwoods will never pay off your debts if you kill their heir.
01:03:23I've reconsidered. Once I have that wand, I will be the most powerful witch alive.
01:03:29Debts won't matter. The stupid Sherwoods won't matter. And as for the girl, well...
01:03:35I don't need her breathing to use her power.
01:03:39I can always marry Sigrid off to form new alliances.
01:03:43Guess you won't be trapped in a marriage after all, son. You're welcome.
01:03:51Go to hell, old man.
01:04:03Take it!
01:04:06No!
01:04:07No!
01:04:08Your soul will be delicious!
01:04:17I can take Dad's magic.
01:04:19End him.
01:04:21Finally be free.
01:04:26Get off my wife!
01:04:28Get off my wife!
01:04:35You'll pay for that, witch!
01:04:36God!
01:04:40God!
01:04:42God!
01:04:47This isn't the last you'll see of me.
01:04:55Hey, I've got you.
01:04:57You didn't run.
01:04:59You're kidding?
01:05:00I'd be a pretty shitty husband if I let my wife's soul get sucked out by a demon.
01:05:07Eric!
01:05:08You can't get rid of me that usually.
01:05:10No, no, no, no, no! Stay with me!
01:05:12Eric!
01:05:13Oh, my God!
01:05:15Eric!
01:05:16No, no, no, no, no! Stay with me!
01:05:18Oh, my God!
01:05:20I can't save you! I don't have my powers!
01:05:23I need you to run!
01:05:25You could have saved yourself!
01:05:29I've been saving myself.
01:05:31My whole life.
01:05:33You...
01:05:33I thought I'd try something new.
01:05:36You idiot, you stupid, stupid idiot.
01:05:40Yeah.
01:05:42But I'm your idiot.
01:05:50You took a divorce spell.
01:05:52I had a promise.
01:05:55Now you're free.
01:05:59I don't want to be free.
01:06:02I don't want to be free.
01:06:05I don't want to be with you.
01:06:07Just keep secrets safe.
01:06:09Safe from my father.
01:06:12Safe from all of it.
01:06:15You know, those days in Vegas...
01:06:20were the best three days of my life.
01:06:22All right, let's get this show started, okay?
01:06:27I love you.
01:06:29I love you, too.
01:06:32I love you.
01:06:33I love you.
01:06:35Eric.
01:06:38No!
01:06:42I love you.
01:06:46No!
01:06:50No!
01:06:52No!
01:06:59No!
01:07:00No!
01:07:01The Wand of Light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires.
01:07:10Please, please, please.
01:07:20Eric, please.
01:07:33Eric, you absolute moron.
01:07:42You absolute moron.
01:07:44Be gentle. I was dead for like ten seconds.
01:07:48Eric, you're alive.
01:07:51That is for divorcing me on your literal deathbed, you asshole.
01:07:56I thought I was doing something noble, something cool.
01:07:59The wand gave you your power back?
01:08:03My mom used to say that the wand's user grants it its deepest desire.
01:08:07I guess it knew what I really wanted.
01:08:11What did you want?
01:08:14You.
01:08:17Don't scare me like that again, okay?
01:08:19You know, I thought I heard something, but I was bleeding out.
01:08:29Maybe you could say it again?
01:08:35Maybe you could say it again?
01:08:39I love you, Eric's Vincent.
01:08:43That's my girl.
01:08:50Let's go.
01:09:03You ready for one last stop?
01:09:07Yeah.
01:09:27Ah, there you are.
01:09:30I knew I could always trust a demon to get the job done.
01:09:34Now, where is my wand?
01:09:38Wait.
01:09:39You're supposed to be dead.
01:09:41Wow.
01:09:42You weren't kidding.
01:09:43He really is evil.
01:09:45I put a barrier around this whole house.
01:09:47It's impossible.
01:09:48There's no way you should be able to be in here.
01:09:50There's always a loophole, old man.
01:09:55Secret.
01:09:56You ungrateful brat.
01:09:58How dare you betray me like this?
01:10:00Really, Dad?
01:10:01Playing the family card after you almost sold me into child marriage?
01:10:05You ungrateful little pests!
01:10:14You're powerless now, old man.
01:10:16Your magic's gone.
01:10:18Forever.
01:10:31Eric, Otis, Svensson, release me this instant!
01:10:36And that is an order!
01:10:39You can handle it from here, right?
01:10:41His powers are gone.
01:10:42It doesn't scare me anymore.
01:10:46You ungrateful little brats.
01:10:48Both of you will pay for this!
01:10:49You will both pay for this!
01:10:55Yeah, yeah.
01:10:56Talk soon, pups.
01:10:57We're gonna hit the road.
01:10:58I said get back here.
01:11:00I said get back here!
01:11:02Get back here!
01:11:03Please don't do this, you little bitch!
01:11:06No!
01:11:08No!
01:11:09No!
01:11:21So, where to now?
01:11:24Should we go and drop off the Wand of Life?
01:11:27Yeah.
01:11:29But there's something I wanna do first.
01:11:32That sounds ominous.
01:11:34It just so happens that there's another full moon tonight.
01:11:39Leona Sherwood, are you asking me to hand fast marry you?
01:11:45Yeah.
01:11:47I think I am Eric Spencer.
01:11:50Well, we better hurry if we're gonna take the Wand of Light home and make it back in time to
01:11:54the hunk-a-hunk-a wedding chapel of love.
01:11:57I wonder if they have the same Elvis.
01:11:59I sure hope so.
01:11:59I know.
01:12:00But, if we're gonna get hand fast married again, no more secrets this time.
01:12:06So, is there anything you wanna come clean about now, soon to be again husband?
01:12:13There is one thing.
01:12:16You might wanna buckle up.
01:12:18We're about to go super speed.
01:12:20Bessie could've been going super speed this entire time.
01:12:24You didn't tell me to make our trip last longer, didn't you?
01:12:27You know me so well, soon to be again wife.
01:12:33Leona Sherwood, will you marry me?
01:12:36And not because of some spell or because it's your duty.
01:12:41But because you want to.
01:12:46Yes, I will.
01:12:57Really?
01:12:58Hell yeah.
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