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Short filmTranscript
00:00:23Jesus! Mom, can you at least warn me when you're gonna do that? Please?
00:00:27Oh, please. Don't be such a child. Do you still have the Wand of Light?
00:00:42See? The all-powerful magic heirloom. Still safe and sound.
00:00:47Well, you should be more careful.
00:00:49The Wand of Light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires.
00:00:53Yeah. And if it falls into the wrong hands, it would become the most dangerous weapon in the world.
00:01:00But a marriage to another noble witch family would only strengthen your power.
00:01:05Yeah. Unless it's an evil Svensson, right?
00:01:09The Svensons are our worst enemies, Leona. Do you know how much our family has suffered over the centuries because
00:01:16of them?
00:01:17I know. Sorry.
00:01:21You are the guardian of the Wand of Light, Leona. And you can't reach your full potential until you marry
00:01:28and succeed me as head of the family.
00:01:31Come home with a husband next week or I will pick one for you.
00:01:34What?
00:01:35Mom, no. Please don't.
00:01:37Leona Sherwood, you are getting married whether you like the boy I pick or not.
00:01:42Mom, please.
00:01:43You understand?
00:01:46Don't worry, Mom. I'm the responsible daughter. Remember.
00:01:58Okay, Leona Sherwood. This is your last weekend of freedom.
00:02:06For two more nights. Fuck my responsibility. I'm gonna have some fun.
00:02:25Thank you. That would be $25.
00:02:29I think you mean it's on the house.
00:02:32What?
00:02:34Right. It's on the house.
00:02:54There you are, little Miss Sherwood.
00:03:03Where the hell are you?
00:03:04I'm in Vegas like I said I would be old man.
00:03:07Hey, don't you get smart with me, you little shit.
00:03:10Remember your mission.
00:03:12Seduce the Sherwood heir and marry her and then that whole obnoxious family will be there to pay off our
00:03:17debts.
00:03:18You mean your debts.
00:03:19Quiet.
00:03:20It's bad enough that I have a sorry excuse for an heir.
00:03:24You are an embarrassment to the Spenson name.
00:03:27Now if you don't marry the Sherwood girl like I told you, I am going to sell your little sister
00:03:33off to old Fitzgerald to be his fourth wife.
00:03:36Dad.
00:03:37Dad's secret is just a kid.
00:03:38When I want your opinion, I will ask for it until then you shut up and do as I say.
00:03:45Do you understand?
00:03:46Yeah, I understand.
00:03:49Good.
00:03:50And you, keep practicing.
00:03:52You sound god awful.
00:03:55Heartless fucking bastard.
00:04:11It's two of us.
00:04:13You're saying you don't remember me?
00:04:15Who remembers Shippen and his dumb teens anyways?
00:04:17No way.
00:04:19Totally.
00:04:19I love that show.
00:04:21I watched it in one sitting at like 2am.
00:04:23This is one of my favorites.
00:04:25It definitely doesn't get the love that it deserves.
00:04:27But I think it's one of their best ones.
00:04:29Really?
00:04:30I never begged you for a sappy romance kind of guy.
00:04:35Looks can be deceiving.
00:04:41The Wand of Light.
00:04:44So it does exist.
00:04:46Maybe I'm just jaded.
00:04:47It's hard to believe that love like that actually exists in real life.
00:04:51Why not?
00:04:52We're witches.
00:04:52Monsters and magic exist in our world.
00:04:56Why can't you love?
00:04:58I am Lele, by the way.
00:05:01Lele Collins.
00:05:05Eric Phillips.
00:05:07Nice to meet you, Lele Collins.
00:05:10Damn.
00:05:10He's hot.
00:05:11And I'm in Vegas.
00:05:12I deserve a little fun.
00:05:14Well, Eric Phillips.
00:05:16I'll be in the poker room tonight.
00:05:19Maybe I'll see you there.
00:05:20Maybe.
00:05:21Maybe.
00:05:30Maybe...
00:05:39Okay, Svenson.
00:05:41Don't fuck this up.
00:05:56Eric motherfucking Svensson
00:05:58Excuse me?
00:05:59You ghosted me for three months after sleeping with me
00:06:02And you think you can sit there and act like nothing happened?
00:06:04I think you've got me confused with someone else
00:06:06Don't gaslight me, Svensson
00:06:08I know exactly who you are
00:06:24You know who she is?
00:06:26I think she's got me confused with someone else
00:06:32Thank you
00:06:41You nervous?
00:06:42Not at all
00:06:44You can always vote, you know
00:06:46I'd hate to send you home empty-handed
00:06:50Not a chance
00:06:52I'm here to win
00:06:53You sure?
00:06:56Seems like your focus is somewhere else
00:06:59Oh
00:07:00I am very focused
00:07:04Are you guys done making gugu eyes at each other or what?
00:07:09You're full of shit, Phillips
00:07:11I call
00:07:12Yeah, there is no way that you have this
00:07:15But don't worry
00:07:17I'll let you go another round
00:07:19Once I beat you
00:07:20Actually, I think I'm about to hit the jackpot
00:07:26Eric?
00:07:47I have wanted to do that
00:07:48Since I saw you by the pool in your bikini
00:07:51Eric, everyone can see
00:07:54Do you want me to stop?
00:08:10Let him watch
00:08:13Give him a shower
00:08:25Wait, please don't stop
00:08:28Use your words
00:08:30Tell me what you want
00:08:32I want your tongue inside me
00:08:34Please
00:08:35That's a good girl
00:08:42Eric
00:08:43Eric
00:08:46Wait
00:08:47Wait, I think I'm gonna
00:08:50Was that some kind of vision?
00:08:55No
00:08:56That was from him
00:09:06Lucky son of a bitch
00:09:08Beginner Lux
00:09:09Let's see you do it again next hand
00:09:11No can do
00:09:13I have a date with a
00:09:15Very pretty lady
00:09:22Why do I have the feeling that you're not exactly as you present?
00:09:25Eric
00:09:26Phillips
00:09:28It is Vegas
00:09:30Isn't that part of the fun?
00:09:43You know
00:09:45It wasn't very nice of you
00:09:47To tease me with your strap of your dress during our game
00:09:51It's very distracting
00:09:54Well you know it wasn't very nice of you
00:09:57To send me that little vision during our game
00:10:00I just wanted to give you a little sneak preview
00:10:07Eric, there are people
00:10:13And if you're quiet
00:10:15They won't see you
00:10:18I should stop
00:10:20This wasn't how the plan was supposed to go
00:10:22You know, you were right before
00:10:24I'm not who I say I am
00:10:26And who out there is exactly
00:10:28As they present
00:10:30But I am
00:10:31Look, I don't care who you are outside of this
00:10:34For once in my life
00:10:35I
00:10:37I just want to forget about everything
00:10:40Just live in the moment
00:10:42And I think you
00:10:45Can help me do that
00:10:52Remove the camouflage
00:10:54I want you to see you
00:10:57The real you
00:10:59But then you'll know who I am
00:11:02I already know who you are
00:11:04The real you
00:11:06Wants to let go
00:11:12No one's ever looked at me like that
00:11:14He really wants me
00:11:17The real me
00:11:18Fuck
00:11:21You are gorgeous
00:11:25I want you, Eric
00:11:28I need you
00:11:32Spread your legs for me
00:11:38Keep your eyes open
00:11:41I want you to watch yourself come
00:11:45All over my fingers
00:11:50Keep your eyes open
00:11:57I thought you said that they couldn't hear me
00:11:59They can't if you stay quiet
00:12:02Keep your eyes open
00:12:03We're all stuck
00:12:08That's a good girl
00:12:09Look down at my hand
00:12:16Oh my god, they hurt me
00:12:18I can't
00:12:20Just relax
00:12:22I can't, Eric
00:12:25It's okay
00:12:26Don't think
00:12:29Just tell
00:12:30Tell me how you can
00:12:32So good
00:12:33But I need
00:12:35More
00:12:36Eric
00:12:39You feel so good
00:12:41I can't wait to put my mouth on you
00:12:46So I'm going to make you come
00:12:48I'll get you there
00:12:50I'm going to go down
00:12:52I want you to scream my name
00:12:54And I'll go
00:12:55Five
00:12:57Four
00:12:59Three
00:13:01Two
00:13:05Four
00:13:25I can't believe I just came on his hand
00:13:28In front of other people
00:13:31I think this is your floor
00:13:39I'll be at the fountain tomorrow
00:13:40At eight o'clock
00:13:43If you decide that you want one
00:13:45See you there
00:13:56How does he know what floor I was on
00:14:03So you've told me all about your wild sister
00:14:06And the things that she's done
00:14:08What about you
00:14:12I'm the responsible sister
00:14:15The boring one
00:14:16If you will
00:14:18And I do what I'm supposed to do
00:14:19Follow the rules
00:14:20And all that good stuff
00:14:23I don't believe you
00:14:24I mean
00:14:25I know how you are
00:14:26In an elevator
00:14:27Oh come on
00:14:30Come on
00:14:31It's Vegas
00:14:32Let me be your bad influence
00:14:34Just for tonight
00:14:38So
00:14:39Any bad ideas
00:14:44Just one
00:14:51What are you doing
00:15:09No games
00:15:10Just fuck me already
00:15:12I thought I would try to woo you first
00:15:14Consider me wooed
00:15:15Then we could take it slow
00:15:16Your lips say one thing
00:15:19But your body says something else
00:15:32Wait
00:15:35Shit
00:15:36I almost lost my cool
00:15:38I gotta remember the plan
00:15:42Oh my god
00:15:43I can't believe I just did that
00:15:44That was so embarrassing
00:15:45This is why I don't do crazy shit
00:15:47That was way too much
00:15:49Hey
00:15:50You're never too much
00:15:51You don't understand
00:15:52Eric
00:15:53Okay if my family saw me do any of that
00:15:55They would freak out
00:15:57Tonight's not about your family
00:15:58Tonight's about you
00:15:59Remember
00:16:00Forget what everyone else has told you to do
00:16:03Do something that you want to do
00:16:05Something no one would expect
00:16:08Maybe he's right
00:16:09I've spent my whole life doing what my family's told me to do
00:16:15For once in my life
00:16:17I'm doing something for myself
00:16:19She spotted the chapel
00:16:22Just like I planned
00:16:26So are you uh
00:16:27Be sure about this marriage thing
00:16:29It's only temporary
00:16:31Okay and old magic is weak
00:16:33The hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning
00:16:36So are you ready for a homie matrimony
00:16:39I'm ready if you're ready
00:16:42Come on
00:16:46Let's go
00:16:52You nervous?
00:16:55Just never been married before
00:17:05It's my sister
00:17:06I need to take this
00:17:06Oh yeah
00:17:07Take your time
00:17:09Elvis here wants me to pick out a hand fast bouquet
00:17:11Hey mama
00:17:11Let's get some flowers for you
00:17:12Come on
00:17:13Let's do it
00:17:14You need to come home
00:17:16Now
00:17:16I can't
00:17:18Secret
00:17:18Eric
00:17:18Dad's up to something
00:17:20He invited Fitzgerald to the house
00:17:22And made me dress up
00:17:23He looks at me weird
00:17:24It really freaks me out
00:17:26You were my big brother E
00:17:27I need you
00:17:28Here
00:17:29Listen I can't leave right now
00:17:31But I promise
00:17:32When I come home
00:17:33I'll have enough power to get rid of dad forever
00:17:34Okay?
00:17:38Hey
00:17:41Is everything okay?
00:17:43Yeah
00:17:45Yeah it's fine
00:17:48You uh
00:17:49You sure about this?
00:17:52It's only temporary
00:17:53Come on
00:17:54Come on
00:17:54We'll be laughing about this for years
00:18:00Let's go
00:18:15Right
00:18:15Only temporary
00:18:17Unless you get hand fasted under a full moon
00:18:20Then the hand fast bond is nearly unbreakable
00:18:23But she doesn't know that
00:18:25And once she does
00:18:26She'll hate me
00:18:28Is your sister okay?
00:18:31Is something wrong?
00:18:33Nothing's wrong
00:18:35We're about to get married in Vegas by Ovis
00:18:38What could possibly be wrong?
00:18:40Alright you ready to rock and roll
00:18:42You hunk-a-hunk-a-hot couple?
00:18:45Let's get this show started
00:18:46Woo
00:19:13This is it.
00:19:15I have the Wand of Light, the most powerful object in the world.
00:19:20If I leave now, I could use it to take control away from my father, set Sigrid and I free.
00:19:33But I already betrayed her once.
00:20:02I have the wand of Light, the most powerful object in the world.
00:20:17Off to get more chocolate strawberries.
00:20:19Be back soon.
00:20:29It's only temporary.
00:20:31Okay, and old magic is weak.
00:20:33The handfast bond will probably only last till the morning.
00:20:36Hmm, that's weird.
00:20:38The mark should have worn off by now.
00:20:48So, did you marry the girl yet?
00:20:54No, it's complicated.
00:20:58Complicated?
00:20:59Or distracted?
00:21:00You were sent there to marry the Sherwood heir and bind her power to this family.
00:21:06Not to play house.
00:21:07You're a Svensson.
00:21:09Act like one.
00:21:09Eric is a Svensson?
00:21:13I married my family's worst enemy?
00:21:16I don't need you to tell me what I am.
00:21:18Then stop hesitating.
00:21:20If the rumors about the Wand of Light are true, we might catch an even bigger prize.
00:21:25So hurry up and marry the Sherwood girl and then bring her to me!
00:21:39He's been lying this whole time.
00:21:46I need to tell her the truth.
00:21:50You lying piece of bullshit!
00:21:53You didn't want me.
00:21:54You just wanted the fucking wand, didn't you?
00:21:58I didn't even know the wand existed until I met you.
00:22:01You still lied to me, Eric.
00:22:02You knew I was a Sherwood from the start!
00:22:04That's why you gave me a fake fucking name, right?
00:22:06Okay, I did, but that was before we-
00:22:08Why before?
00:22:09Before you decided to mess with me?
00:22:11Get your dick wet before you ruin me and my family forever?
00:22:14I'm not trying to ruin your family, I'm trying to save mine!
00:22:17Oh, I know all about you, Svensons!
00:22:20All you do is lie and cheat and steal to get whatever you fucking want!
00:22:24I should have caught it at the poker table, but your little tricks won't work on me this time!
00:22:30The hand fast mark, it'll fade!
00:22:33Just like you, just like whatever this was!
00:22:35The hand fast wasn't a trick!
00:22:37Not that part!
00:22:38Not with you!
00:22:40It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:22:42You will never, ever get the wand!
00:22:46Lily, wait!
00:22:48When this fades, Eric, I will never have to see you again!
00:23:05So, that didn't happen.
00:23:10My older sister Effie told me that the mark would fade a week later.
00:23:14Then a month went by...
00:23:17Then...
00:23:18Well...
00:23:22See, this is where you don't fuck with old magic.
00:23:25It's all fun and games, so there's a full moon.
00:23:28Then it's the most powerful magic in the universe.
00:23:35Apparently, getting hand fast married under a full moon creates a bond that's almost unbreakable.
00:23:41Also, apparently, the almost part means that both people have to perform the divorce spell.
00:23:49I tried calling.
00:23:52Texting.
00:23:53Sending flying monkeys.
00:23:55Nothing.
00:23:55Not a single word.
00:23:57From my beloved husband.
00:23:59For half a year.
00:24:10Yes, I still sleep with a wand under my pillow.
00:24:12So, the emotional ass whooping I got from my mother for getting hand fasted to a stranger was bad enough.
00:24:19No one can ever find out that I almost lost the wand too.
00:24:23I just need one night...
00:24:25To sleep without...
00:24:28Thinking about him.
00:24:51Who are you?
00:24:53What do you want with the wand of light?
00:24:56Nothing.
00:24:57I'm just here to collect my payday from my client once I bring them that wand.
00:25:02Payday?
00:25:03Someone sent you!
00:25:04Who?
00:25:05I'm afraid I can't break client confidentiality.
00:25:08Sorry, sweetie.
00:25:10Well, I'm afraid that you chose the wrong witch to fuck with tonight.
00:25:26Be wise not to fight back, witch.
00:25:29You're in over your head.
00:25:32I'd rather die than let you take the wand!
00:25:36Suit yourself.
00:25:37No...
00:25:38Uh!
00:25:41Suit yourself!
00:25:44No...
00:25:45Uh!
00:25:48Uh!
00:25:49Uh!
00:25:50Uh!
00:25:51Uh!
00:25:51What the fuck?
00:25:53Uh!
00:25:57Uh!
00:26:02Uh!
00:26:03Uh!
00:26:04Uh!
00:26:05Uh!
00:26:06Uh!
00:26:06She has the wand!
00:26:08I got the wand. I'll get the rest later.
00:26:14No!
00:26:18You are the reason I lost the wand.
00:26:20Who are you?
00:26:26The hand fast mark.
00:26:31Hello, wife.
00:26:33Miss me?
00:26:36What are you doing here?
00:26:39You know, I thought I'd spice up our marriage, do a little role-playing,
00:26:42but it looks like you're more into bondage.
00:26:44I didn't know you were so kinky.
00:26:45Shut up!
00:26:50You should be thanking me. I did just save your life.
00:26:52Thanking you?
00:26:53You're the reason my family's most powerful heirloom is gone.
00:26:57How did you even find me?
00:27:00Wait a minute.
00:27:01You were trying to steal the wand too, weren't you?
00:27:05Maybe.
00:27:07You slimy, tote-faced motherfucker!
00:27:11Okay, first you tricked me into marrying you, then you ghost me for six months,
00:27:15and now you come in here like a goddamn fucking cartoon burglar and try to take my wand!
00:27:20Look, I was just gonna borrow it!
00:27:22Yeah, for one of your dirty, no-good-spensing schemes?
00:27:26I just... I need it.
00:27:28Okay, it's... it's the only way that we can be free.
00:27:33Look, my dad doesn't know about our marriage. Not yet.
00:27:37But he knows about the wand. If he gets a hold of it, he's gonna sail to the highest bidder.
00:27:40Whoever controls the wand has the power to take over the world. Or... worse.
00:27:45No! Worse than tricking me into marrying you?
00:27:47I told you that that wasn't a trick.
00:27:49It doesn't matter, Eric. She has the wand! That shadow thief or whatever!
00:27:55And that's your fault!
00:27:56I can get it back!
00:27:59Look, I know I don't deserve it, but just give me one more chance.
00:28:04I can get the wand back, take care of what I need to take care of, and then I'll do
00:28:07the divorce spell.
00:28:09Please, Lili, just give me one more chance. Please.
00:28:13I can't trust him. I shouldn't.
00:28:17But my gut tells me, this time, it might be different.
00:28:27No. No, we're both gonna go get it.
00:28:31It is my job as a Sherwood heir to set things right.
00:28:35So I don't let the wand fall into the wrong hands.
00:28:38And you really think after Vegas, I would let you go alone to find the most powerful magical object in
00:28:43the entire world?
00:28:46Fair. Uh, whatever you want, Lili.
00:28:49God, I hate when you call me that.
00:28:52Alright, I'll call you wife. And you can call me whatever you want.
00:28:57Eric, husband, daddy...
00:29:00Shut up! Don't call me wife either.
00:29:02After we get this wand, we will do the divorce spell. Got it?
00:29:05You're breaking my heart. I mean, you're the better half of my soul.
00:29:10Yeah, you're not gonna sweet-talk your way into my pants again, Eric.
00:29:14We'll see.
00:29:19Now the wand forbids a direct tracking spell, so we have to track its trail.
00:29:24That's a ten-mile radius. We'll never find the wand inside that circle.
00:29:28Well, with the tracking spell, I get a location, okay? It doesn't last long, though.
00:29:33We'll have like three or four days.
00:29:35Well, lucky for you, I already packed our bags.
00:29:39Consider it our official honeymoon.
00:29:46After this, we're done. You got it? Don't go back on your words, Vincent.
00:29:50We will do the divorce spell.
00:29:52Cross my heart. Hope to die.
00:30:12You imagined a car here?
00:30:14This isn't just any car.
00:30:22This is Bessie.
00:30:24You really expect us to track down the most powerful, magical object in the world?
00:30:29In a car without a roof?
00:30:32I mean, if you're not comfortable, I could go by myself.
00:30:40If you trust me not to run away.
00:30:42Hmm.
00:30:44I wouldn't trust you with a half-eaten newt muffin.
00:30:46I was gonna throw in the trash.
00:30:50Then your chariot awaits.
00:30:52Wife.
00:31:12We've been driving all day, and she hasn't said a single word.
00:31:28You're Svensson.
00:31:29You don't play house with sheriffs.
00:31:31Why are we turning?
00:31:32We don't have any time.
00:31:34We have to find the wand, Eric.
00:31:36That circle is getting further and further away.
00:31:39Plus, it's getting dark.
00:31:40We need to stay somewhere for the night.
00:31:42Why don't you just let me drive?
00:31:43Because you haven't slept either.
00:31:45Plus, no one can drive Bessie but me.
00:31:48What is with guys and cars?
00:31:50Jesus.
00:31:51No.
00:31:51I mean literally, no one else can drive Bessie.
00:31:54My great-great-grandfather put a hex on all of our possessions.
00:31:58Anyone that's non-blood related can't touch it.
00:32:00The Svensson's like to hoard their treasures.
00:32:03Your family has issues.
00:32:05Finally.
00:32:06Something we can agree on.
00:32:08Was this your plan all along?
00:32:10Make me feel bad for you because your family's evil, so I get all ooey gooey and forget about
00:32:15the divorce?
00:32:15Not everyone in my family is evil.
00:32:18Yeah.
00:32:20Okay.
00:32:32You cross this wall or do anything to piss me off more than you already have, then you
00:32:37do not even want to imagine the hex I'm going to put on you.
00:32:45I promise, no funny business.
00:32:49Pinky promise.
00:32:54Black man for you.
00:33:10Blackmam Are you at your house?
00:33:12Blackwashing Well, I am right.
00:33:18Blackman for you.
00:33:20Blackwashing.
00:33:25in Vegas you said you had a sister right yeah Sigrid she didn't ask to be a Svensson
00:33:38she's different than us better not like you no not like me but you already know that
00:33:59so
00:34:02so
00:34:04so
00:34:04so
00:34:04so
00:34:40Good morning, wife.
00:34:43I told you not to call me.
00:35:01You were saying something?
00:35:04What?
00:35:08How did you know I was awake?
00:35:10The husband always knows.
00:35:19Well, if you don't mind, I'm going to shower.
00:35:24No peeking.
00:35:29Cross my heart.
00:35:31Hope to die.
00:35:40I need to get a grip.
00:35:42Some washboard ads and a cocky grin aren't enough to make me fall for him.
00:35:47I just need this one time to take the edge off.
00:35:59I remember he touched me like this in Vegas.
00:36:15Look, I'm so close.
00:36:21Oh, yeah.
00:36:23That's it, Lily.
00:36:25Be a good girl.
00:36:26And go for me.
00:36:34Are you ready?
00:36:38Okay.
00:36:40Eric.
00:36:55You said that you wouldn't look.
00:36:59I don't need to look to know what you were doing while thinking about me.
00:37:04God, you are so full of yourself.
00:37:07Do I know what I heard?
00:37:08Say another word and I'll turn you into a frog.
00:37:14Were you thinking about that time in Vegas where I ate you out in the shower?
00:37:21You came so hard you almost crushed my skull between your thighs.
00:37:26I think about those times a lot.
00:37:29Yeah, well, I don't think about them at all.
00:37:56You still haven't even told me what you want the wand for yet.
00:38:00It's on a need-to-know basis.
00:38:02Oh, don't you think I need to know?
00:38:06I am your wife, after all.
00:38:08Oh, now you remember you're my wife.
00:38:10Funny how you only remember that when it's convenient for you.
00:38:13I remember every time I think about how badly I fucked up in Vegas.
00:38:16So all I am is a mistake.
00:38:18If I remember right, you're the one that suggested that we get hand-fast married.
00:38:22Obviously, that was before I knew about all your bullshit and lies.
00:38:26Duty and responsibility might not be a big deal in your family, but in mine, it's huge.
00:38:32See? There you go again.
00:38:33Always worried about what your family wants.
00:38:35It's never about what you want.
00:38:37I follow the rules because I have to, Eric.
00:38:40If I don't, I end up in situations like this.
00:38:43Did you ever stop to think that maybe that's unfair?
00:38:46That maybe your ideas and their ideas are bullshit?
00:38:50You ever think of that?
00:38:52Spoken like a true Spinson.
00:38:53Well, you're a Spinson too, sweetheart.
00:38:56Not much longer, I can tell you that.
00:39:17I'm gonna get some coffee.
00:39:18It's getting dark.
00:39:19You really think you should be alone?
00:39:20So now that we're married, you think you have to babysit me too?
00:39:27Fine.
00:39:28Just don't take too long.
00:39:33You got her in the car or what?
00:39:35Who?
00:39:35Don't play done with me, boy.
00:39:38The little Sherwood witch you married.
00:39:40I forgot to tell me about.
00:39:44You thought I wouldn't find out, huh?
00:39:46You did a good job of hiding it.
00:39:47I'll give you that.
00:39:49Maybe you are my son after all.
00:39:51Huh?
00:39:52What's the end game here?
00:39:53You said you just needed to get the Sherwood's wand so you could pay off your debts.
00:39:56What does she have to do with it?
00:39:57Because I'm not an idiot like you.
00:40:00I'll finally have all the leverage I need over the Sherwood family.
00:40:05When I tell them their pretty little heir is my new daughter-in-law.
00:40:09And then it'll be our family that gets to call the shots in the magic world.
00:40:13So you just want to use her?
00:40:15Like you use mom?
00:40:17Like you're using your own daughter?
00:40:18This is not a request, boy.
00:40:21Bring the girl and the wand to me or you will be stripped of your name.
00:40:25Your magic, everything.
00:40:27And your sister, she'll be the one paying the price for your mistakes.
00:40:41This isn't right.
00:40:42The trail should still be here.
00:40:45Would you like some coffee, Miss Sherwood?
00:40:48Yeah, thank you.
00:40:49Wait, how did you know my...
00:40:51You.
00:40:55But the map said that...
00:40:57That's cute.
00:40:59You think that dusty old map could track me?
00:41:06That wand is mine.
00:41:11Not anymore, it's not.
00:41:13And sadly, my employers need your powers too.
00:41:16Employer?
00:41:19Hold still.
00:41:20This will only hurt a bit.
00:41:22No, stop.
00:41:23Stop!
00:41:32Get away from her!
00:41:37Eric, the wand!
00:41:43Eric, the wand!
00:41:51My magic.
00:41:52She took half of my magic, Eric!
00:41:55You're okay.
00:41:55You're okay.
00:41:56I got you.
00:41:57You're okay.
00:42:01I don't understand.
00:42:02The map said that the wand was miles away.
00:42:05What did she want with my powers?
00:42:07The thief must have found some way to bypass the tracking spell.
00:42:10She can't have gone far.
00:42:11We'll find her.
00:42:12Lay load for now.
00:42:13Eric, stop the car.
00:42:15I can't breathe.
00:42:16I can't breathe.
00:42:17Okay.
00:42:26Hey, hey, hey.
00:42:28Look at me.
00:42:29Look at me.
00:42:29You're okay.
00:42:30You're okay.
00:42:31Just breathe.
00:42:32I got you.
00:42:33You're safe.
00:42:35I thought she was going to kill me, Eric.
00:42:38I'm not going to let that happen.
00:42:41Not while I'm breathing.
00:42:45I'm not going to let that happen.
00:42:55I still hate you.
00:42:58If you hated me, you wouldn't let me touch you like this.
00:43:03This doesn't change anything.
00:43:05It's only scratching an itch.
00:43:08Once we get the wand, and we do the door spell,
00:43:12and we forget each other existed.
00:43:18Is that what you want, Lily?
00:43:20You want to forget how good I make you feel?
00:43:23You want to forget I'm the only person in the whole fucking world
00:43:27who can make you feel this way?
00:43:33Eric.
00:43:36Wait, wait.
00:43:38Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:43:44We can't do this.
00:43:48This is what goes wrong between us.
00:43:50We can't make that mistake again.
00:43:52We have a job to do, Eric.
00:43:54Let's get the wand.
00:43:55That's it.
00:43:56And then what?
00:43:58You know what happens after, Eric.
00:44:01We do the divorce spell,
00:44:03and we never see each other again.
00:44:37Smells like fresh baked pastries, cinnamon, old magic.
00:44:46I should have known.
00:44:48It's a satyr's inn.
00:44:50That spell.
00:44:52Nomenin habitus smell.
00:44:55It's woven into places like this for couples.
00:45:00You mean or cheese?
00:45:02These satyrs are the horniest bastards in the known world.
00:45:06It lowers any fear, doubt, shame,
00:45:11grits of your deepest desires
00:45:13without any fear of judgment or consequences.
00:45:26Erich, don't.
00:45:28I'm trying not to.
00:45:39Erich, don't.
00:45:41I'm trying not to.
00:45:48The spell doesn't create desire.
00:45:52It lets go of the lies.
00:45:55It tells us what we really want.
00:45:57What I want doesn't matter.
00:46:00It matters in here.
00:46:02Tell me what you really want.
00:46:04You can say goodbye.
00:46:07And go our separate ways.
00:46:09Or you can tell me you want this.
00:46:12You want me.
00:46:15Tell me to stay.
00:46:19Stay here.
00:46:21Please.
00:46:23God, what is this?
00:46:24Is this just the magic?
00:46:26Hurry.
00:46:27Oh.
00:46:30It's not the spell.
00:46:32It's freedom.
00:46:34You can hear the outside world, does it, man?
00:46:37Just you.
00:46:39And me.
00:46:41I shouldn't want this.
00:46:43I know.
00:46:46I shouldn't be doing this.
00:46:50Or this.
00:46:53Be able to share with
00:46:54to the most respected family of the whole rich world.
00:46:59You definitely shouldn't sound this fucking sexy.
00:47:02To mine.
00:47:05You're with the ear.
00:47:07To the Sherwood family.
00:47:10Who are you?
00:47:11I want you, Eric.
00:47:14I need you.
00:47:18Tell me who you are.
00:47:21Lily.
00:47:23Close.
00:47:27But not quite.
00:47:29Tonight.
00:47:31Tell me who you are.
00:47:33Your wife.
00:47:58This doesn't change anything.
00:48:01I know.
00:48:02We can have tonight.
00:48:04And then tomorrow we go back to who we are on the outside.
00:48:07Sure.
00:48:08I'll go back to being my bad self.
00:48:10And you can go back to pretending to be a good little witch.
00:48:14Excuse me.
00:48:16Don't deny.
00:48:16Lily.
00:48:17Lily.
00:48:17Share what's Vincent.
00:48:18I know what kind of dork.
00:48:20Naughty thoughts you have.
00:48:23I don't.
00:48:26It's okay to be bad.
00:48:28You don't have to pretend.
00:48:32I don't, huh?
00:48:37You know, just because I have half my magic
00:48:39doesn't mean I can't play with you for tonight.
00:48:44I don't have to pretend to be a good little witch.
00:48:53Now you're going to sit there like a good little witch.
00:49:04And I'm going to do.
00:49:06Whatever I want to you.
00:49:16I don't remember packing that lingerie.
00:49:18Close your eyes.
00:49:23Eric, you're so good for being such a bad boy.
00:49:28I'm being properly motivated not to move.
00:49:36See how long it takes you to break.
00:49:39For you, I could stay here forever.
00:49:41Pretty to think so.
00:49:43Why don't we test that little theory, huh?
00:49:46We're playing a dangerous game.
00:49:49All you have to do
00:49:52is admit that I win.
00:49:55I'll let you fuck me.
00:49:56I'll even
00:49:58let you come wherever you want.
00:50:03You can come here.
00:50:07Or here.
00:50:10I'll even
00:50:11let you come in here.
00:50:15God.
00:50:17Come on.
00:50:18I know you wanna
00:50:19just admit
00:50:22I'm right.
00:50:25Fine.
00:50:27You win.
00:50:28Oh, what was fast?
00:50:30You hurt me.
00:50:32Oh.
00:50:40So what's my prize?
00:50:45I could
00:50:46torture you
00:50:47like you did me.
00:50:50But I want to be inside you.
00:50:53I want to feel you
00:50:54squeeze me tight.
00:50:56And take me to bed, husband.
00:51:01Call me that again.
00:51:05You want me to fuck you, husband?
00:51:08Yeah.
00:51:09Fuck me.
00:51:17Tell me a story.
00:51:21Like the ones you did in Vegas.
00:51:24I've got a story about
00:51:26my pet goat, Gilmore,
00:51:28and how he got stuck
00:51:30on a magic carpet.
00:51:32Or the story about
00:51:34how my sister tried to
00:51:35negotiate with a troll
00:51:36using only red images.
00:51:38I know.
00:51:40I already know
00:51:41about your family.
00:51:44I want to know
00:51:45about you.
00:51:47What's it like
00:51:48to be a Svensson heir?
00:51:50You want
00:51:51the insider info.
00:51:52Mm.
00:51:53Mm.
00:51:54You tell me yours,
00:51:54I'll tell you mine.
00:51:56You're gonna tell me
00:51:56how wonderful it was
00:51:58growing up as a
00:51:59beloved and blessed
00:52:01Sherwood?
00:52:05Is that what you think
00:52:06being a show
00:52:06is like?
00:52:09Is that what you think
00:52:10being a show
00:52:10is like?
00:52:11All fun and rainbows?
00:52:13Yeah, everybody
00:52:14loves your family.
00:52:15That's not true, Eric.
00:52:17There are so many people
00:52:18who would love it
00:52:19if we just disappeared.
00:52:21My mother has been
00:52:22shouldering all that
00:52:23responsibility and pressure
00:52:24for decades.
00:52:25And next year,
00:52:26I will be the
00:52:27head witch in charge.
00:52:29Everyone's counting
00:52:30on me to do
00:52:30the right thing.
00:52:31Like eat your fruits
00:52:32and veggies?
00:52:33Like spending my
00:52:34whole childhood
00:52:35being told that
00:52:35the whole world
00:52:36depended on me.
00:52:38Like never bothering
00:52:40to have any hopes
00:52:41or dreams
00:52:42because my whole life
00:52:44was planned for me
00:52:45from the very start
00:52:46before I was even born.
00:52:48I'm always doing
00:52:48the right thing
00:52:49for the family.
00:52:50I was never allowed
00:52:51to even think
00:52:52of doing the wrong thing.
00:52:54I couldn't be tired.
00:52:55I couldn't be scared.
00:52:56I couldn't be angry.
00:52:58One mistake
00:52:59and my family
00:52:59loses everything
00:53:01that they've ever
00:53:01worked for.
00:53:02If this whole world
00:53:03fades to black,
00:53:04it's because I
00:53:04messed up.
00:53:06It's because I
00:53:06didn't do a good job.
00:53:11I don't think
00:53:12I've ever said
00:53:12that out loud before.
00:53:14I'm glad you did.
00:53:17Your turn.
00:53:19Growing up
00:53:20with Svinson
00:53:20was a little different.
00:53:23The old man
00:53:24likes to say
00:53:25I was the first
00:53:27of his disappointments.
00:53:29I guess it's good.
00:53:30At least I was
00:53:31first at something.
00:53:33I didn't care
00:53:34about disappointing him.
00:53:36I just wanted
00:53:36to get away from him.
00:53:38I had it all planned out
00:53:40when I turned 16.
00:53:42I'd leave,
00:53:43change my name
00:53:43and the Svinson bloodline
00:53:44would die with me.
00:53:46My mom died
00:53:47when Secret was born.
00:53:50My dad used her
00:53:52against me
00:53:53every day since.
00:54:00I'm so sorry, Eric.
00:54:02I...
00:54:03I shouldn't have asked.
00:54:06It's okay.
00:54:08Svinsons have always
00:54:09lived in the Sherwood
00:54:10shadows.
00:54:12We are the shadows.
00:54:16all you do
00:54:17is shine.
00:54:27He always asks me
00:54:29what I want.
00:54:32What do you
00:54:32want, Eric?
00:54:36You'd hate me
00:54:37if I told you.
00:54:39I mean,
00:54:40more than you already do.
00:54:43I don't hate you.
00:54:46I never did.
00:54:47I never will put it...
00:54:55I don't do that.
00:55:01I don't want to
00:55:02I don't know.
00:55:02I don't.
00:55:03I don't know.
00:55:08I don'tThank you.
00:55:10I don't know.
00:55:11I will.
00:55:11I don't know.
00:55:14I don't know.
00:55:17You're so lazy.ierto
00:55:17.anger거나,
00:55:17JJ.
00:55:22Eric. Something's wrong. Dad's got visitors. A bunch of old guys. I don't know who they
00:55:28are. He made me play piano for them, like some kind of dress up doll. It's like freaking
00:55:33me out. Eric. Are you safe? Eric. Are you safe?
00:55:47For now. All those weird old men left last night. And I hexed my door so no one could
00:55:55get in. Don't let anyone in. If dad tries to get you to play with any of those weird old
00:55:59men, just... I know. I'll just do what he says. I always do. I'm so sick of this E. What
00:56:08if
00:56:08he actually does make me marry one of those guys? I'm never going to let that happen, alright?
00:56:13Look, I'm close to getting the wand of light. The wand of light?
00:56:19Like the one from the fairy tales? You can't tell that secret. When I get the wand, be ready
00:56:27for my call. I have a plan. I barely know basic spells. I don't know. You can. I know you
00:56:35if you can. When the time is right, you'll be ready.
00:56:44Call and it.
00:57:05Filling up Bessie. Meet me downstairs when you're ready.
00:57:17Oh my god! Why do you and mom always do that? A bit high strung, aren't you, sis?
00:57:25I was just in the middle of thinking. Yeah, and going by your aura, I can guess about who.
00:57:30Very much giving post-orgasmic afterglow. Aww, yeah. Well, you and your little aura reading
00:57:36can go jump in a lake. Oh, aren't we feisty this morning. Your super hot hubby isn't around,
00:57:42I'm guessing? Or have you already murdered him after catching his dick? I know all the best
00:57:46places to hide a body, by the way. I'm fine, Effie. I know all about Eric Spenson. I'm not stupid.
00:57:55And when we get the wand back... You mean if you get the wand back? We will. And when we
00:58:01do,
00:58:02we'll do the divorce spell. This mark will be gone. I'll go home and marry the best person who
00:58:09serves our family alliance. It's not fair, you know. I know I'm the last person who should be
00:58:18saying that because it's not like I can change it. But it's not. It's just the way it goes, right?
00:58:26There has to be a way for you to be with who you actually want and be a good heir.
00:58:32Effie, what I want has nothing to do with anything in my life. That's fine.
00:58:38It's what it means to be a sure what. Just remember, repeating it doesn't make it true.
00:58:46All right. Whatever you say, sis, you know best. I know. Give everyone a hug for me. Tell them I'll
00:58:56be back home soon.
00:59:06Last night was the last time. After today, we're done. If I say that enough times, maybe I'll finally believe
00:59:14it.
00:59:23I'll tell you about my plan with the wand.
00:59:27My family's magic is dying. My father's been cashing in on broken promises for years,
00:59:33but he holds most of the power and me and Sieg, we just get the scraps. That's how he controls
00:59:37us.
00:59:40If I could use the wand just once, I could take his power away from a break.
00:59:45I'm not trying to ruin your family. I'm trying to save mine.
00:59:48It's the only way that we can be free.
00:59:52That's what you meant by trying to save your family.
00:59:56I was going to tell you the night before. I was going to tell you the truth.
00:59:59And then I was just going to ask if I could use the wand just once.
01:00:03And then I would do whatever you wanted. Get a divorce, leave you alone forever.
01:00:10Why didn't you tell me?
01:00:13Why didn't you tell me that morning? Maybe things could have been different.
01:00:19I would have asked you to stay.
01:00:21It's a nice idea, but our families have been at war since the beginning of time.
01:00:27Maybe if we were different people, we have different lives, this would have worked.
01:00:35Maybe we can work.
01:00:37Maybe the wand has a spell for that, Eric.
01:00:41A witch can hope.
01:00:48What?
01:00:51Do I have mushrooms growing out of the side of my head?
01:00:53Why are you looking at me like that?
01:01:07Why are you looking at me like that?
01:01:08Wait, I'm driving.
01:01:09Hole over.
01:01:22Oh damn, oh damn.
01:01:28You have got to be kidding me.
01:01:37End of the line, witches!
01:01:38There he is.
01:02:01Eric!
01:02:11I can't!
01:02:24I can't!
01:02:26Now's not a good time old man.
01:02:27Well, it sounds like my insurance policy worked.
01:02:32You...
01:02:33You sent the Shadow Thief?
01:02:35Of course I sent her.
01:02:37Do you think I would trust you to finish the job?
01:02:50Demons are very expensive, you know?
01:02:54But I thought that the Sherwood girl's soul in exchange for the wand was a good enough bargain.
01:03:02Souls of magic users apparently taste better.
01:03:17You said you needed her alive.
01:03:18The Sherwoods will never pay off your debts if you kill their heir.
01:03:20I've reconsidered.
01:03:22Once I have that wand, I will be the most powerful witch alive.
01:03:28Debts won't matter.
01:03:29The stupid Sherwoods won't matter.
01:03:31And as for the girl, well...
01:03:33I don't need her breathing to use her power.
01:03:36I can always marry Sigrid off to form new alliances.
01:03:41Guess you won't be trapped in a marriage after all, son.
01:03:45You're welcome.
01:03:48Good hell, old man.
01:04:00Take it!
01:04:03No!
01:04:06This stall will be delicious.
01:04:15I can take Dad's magic.
01:04:16End him.
01:04:18Finally be free.
01:04:23Get off my wife!
01:04:32You'll pay for that, witch!
01:04:45This isn't the last you'll see of me.
01:04:53Hey, I got you.
01:04:55You didn't run.
01:04:57You're kidding?
01:04:58I'd be your pretty shitty husband if I let my wife's soul get sucked out by a demon.
01:05:05Eric!
01:05:05You can't get rid of me that easily.
01:05:08No, no, no, no, no, stay with me.
01:05:10Eric!
01:05:10Oh my...
01:05:13Eric, no, no, no, no, no, stay with me.
01:05:15Oh my god.
01:05:17I can't save you.
01:05:19I don't have my powers.
01:05:21Why didn't you run?
01:05:23You could have saved yourself.
01:05:26I've been saving myself my whole life.
01:05:30I thought I'd try something new.
01:05:33You idiot, you stupid, stupid idiot.
01:05:40But I'm your idiot.
01:05:48You took a devil's spell.
01:05:50I had a promise.
01:05:52Now you're free.
01:05:56I don't want to be free.
01:06:00I don't want to be free.
01:06:03I want to be with you.
01:06:05Just keep secrets safe.
01:06:07Safe from my father.
01:06:09Safe from all of it.
01:06:13You know, those days in Vegas...
01:06:17were the best three days of my life.
01:06:19Alright, let's get this show started, okay?
01:06:25I love you.
01:06:27I love you, too.
01:06:30I love you, I love you.
01:06:33Eric.
01:06:36No!
01:06:40I love you.
01:06:43I love you.
01:06:58The Wand of Light has the power
01:07:00to grant its user their deepest desires.
01:07:08Please, please, please.
01:07:18Erick, please.
01:07:31Lily.
01:07:32Erick.
01:07:35You absolute moron.
01:07:39You absolute moron.
01:07:42Be gentle.
01:07:43I was dead for like ten seconds.
01:07:46You're alive.
01:07:49That is for divorcing me
01:07:50on your literal deathbed, you asshole.
01:07:53I thought I was doing something noble.
01:07:55Something cool.
01:07:57The Wand gave you your power back?
01:08:00My mom used to say that
01:08:02the Wand's user grants it its deepest desire.
01:08:05I guess it knew what I really wanted.
01:08:08What did you want?
01:08:11You.
01:08:14Don't scare me like that again, okay?
01:08:18You know,
01:08:18I thought
01:08:20I heard something
01:08:21when I was bleeding out.
01:08:26Maybe you could
01:08:28say it again?
01:08:32Maybe you could
01:08:34say it again?
01:08:36I love you,
01:08:38Erick's Vincent.
01:08:41That's my girl.
01:08:47Let's go.
01:08:48Let's go.
01:08:50Oh.
01:09:01You ready for one last stop?
01:09:02Ian.
01:09:06Ian.
01:09:23Ah.
01:09:24Ah, there you are.
01:09:27I knew I could always trust a demon to get the job done.
01:09:32Now, where is my wand?
01:09:36Wait, you're supposed to be dead.
01:09:38Wow, you weren't kidding.
01:09:40He really is evil.
01:09:42I put a barrier around this whole house.
01:09:45It's impossible.
01:09:46There's no way you should be able to be in here.
01:09:47There's always a loophole, old man.
01:09:53Secret.
01:09:53David, you ungrateful brat.
01:09:56How dare you betray me like this?
01:09:58Really, Dad?
01:09:59Playing the family card after you almost sold me into child marriage?
01:10:03You ungrateful little pests.
01:10:12You're powerless now, old man.
01:10:14Your magic's gone.
01:10:15Forever.
01:10:28Eric, Aldous, Svensson, release me this instant.
01:10:33And that is an order.
01:10:36You can handle it from here, right?
01:10:39His powers are gone.
01:10:40It doesn't scare me anymore.
01:10:43You ungrateful little brats.
01:10:45Both of you, you'll pay for this.
01:10:47You will both pay for this.
01:10:52Yeah, yeah.
01:10:53Talk soon, Pops.
01:10:55We're gonna hit the road.
01:10:56I said get back here.
01:10:58I said get back here.
01:10:59Get back here.
01:11:00Please don't do this, you little...
01:11:19So, where to now?
01:11:21Should we go and drop off the Wand of Life?
01:11:25Yeah.
01:11:27But there's something I want to do first.
01:11:30That sounds ominous.
01:11:32Just so happens that there's another full moon tonight.
01:11:37Leona Sherwood, are you asking me to hand fast marry you?
01:11:43Yeah.
01:11:44I think I am Eric Svensson.
01:11:47Well, we better hurry.
01:11:49We're gonna take the Wand of Light home and make it back in time to the hunk-a-hunk-a
01:11:53wedding chapel of love.
01:11:55I wonder if they have the same Elvis.
01:11:56I sure hope so.
01:11:58But, if we're gonna get hand fast married again, no more secrets this time.
01:12:03So, is there anything you want to come clean about now?
01:12:07Soon to be again, husband.
01:12:10There is one thing.
01:12:14You might want to buckle up.
01:12:16We're about to go super speed.
01:12:18Bessie could have been going super speed this entire time.
01:12:21You didn't tell me to make our trip last longer.
01:12:23Didn't you?
01:12:25You know me so well.
01:12:27Soon to be again, wife.
01:12:30Leona Sherwood, will you marry me?
01:12:34And not because of some spell or because it's your duty.
01:12:39But because you want to.
01:12:43Yes, I will.
01:12:54Ready?
01:12:56Hell yeah.
01:12:56I'll be right back.
01:13:00I'll be right back.
01:13:02I'll be right back.
01:13:03I'll be right back.
01:13:05I'll be right back.
01:13:06I'll be right back.
01:13:07I'll be right back.
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