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#Roốsⓣer S01E01 [Full Movie] [Full Series]Full EP - Full
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04:13M.K.
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04:56Oh, thank you, Chrysal. You're done.
04:58Off you go. Please tell Dean Riggs.
05:00I will meet him at the gym.
05:02Fine.
05:02Thank you for tolerating me.
05:04We're not speaking.
05:06Bye, Greg.
05:07She seems nice.
05:08Chrysal.
05:09Yes? There's no tea?
05:11There's a tea.
05:12There's a tea.
05:14Liberal arts colleges used to be safe havens for free thought, Greg.
05:18When did you and I become the bad guys?
05:20Amen. What?
05:22Populism's not very popular here.
05:23I mean, take Dylan. I love her, but it's no surprise that she hasn't read any of your books.
05:28What are you doing?
05:30It's okay. I actually haven't read any of your poetry either.
05:34It's funny, in your email you said you loved Dylan's poetry.
05:38I did. I do love them. Read all of them.
05:41I just didn't want to make her feel bad.
05:43Ah.
05:44Happy? You got us both.
05:47Unintentional. Just Walt me and Walt.
05:49Dylan, to be continued, Greg, you give me a ten count and then join me.
05:55Yes, he wants you to count to ten and no. I don't know why.
05:58Okay.
06:00I'm going to read your books.
06:01Oh, no. Don't worry about it.
06:03Nice meeting you, Greg.
06:04Nice you. Me also.
06:07Okay.
06:08What are you doing?
06:11Okay.
06:15Oh, boy.
06:16That's barely eight there, Greg.
06:18Do you need another ten or twenty count?
06:20Can I guess what you're thinking?
06:21I doubt it.
06:22Most college presidents are bookish shut-ins, but this guy's jacked.
06:26That's exactly what I was thinking.
06:29I would have also accepted...
06:30Wow!
06:32You know my secret?
06:33Huts on a cold plunge every goddamn day.
06:36You get the same endorphins you get from cocaine only at last two hours instead of nine minutes plus.
06:40Come here.
06:41Let's go closer.
06:43It releases the brown fat.
06:45Well, you've got to release the brown fat.
06:47I knew you'd get it.
06:48I'm glad that you think that I do.
06:51Listen, I would be a bad dad if I didn't ask how Katie was doing, and I know that you
06:55probably have heard about her and Archie.
06:58You go to any campus in America and no marriage between two faculty members has ever lasted more than a
07:02year and a half.
07:03I can't believe that is true.
07:05Well, it may not be factually true, but the spirit of it is.
07:08And what about you?
07:09You ever think about teaching?
07:11Oh, me?
07:12No.
07:13No, not really.
07:14I didn't go to college.
07:16Who cares?
07:17It's overrated.
07:18Real?
07:18Okay.
07:19I'm still looking for my writer in residence.
07:21You say the word.
07:23Gig's yours.
07:24Don't answer now.
07:25Come back and tell me a decision before you leave.
07:27I want you to go out and let this campus get its magic all over you.
07:31All over me?
07:31Yeah, baby.
07:33In the meantime, I'm going to go to the gym and throw some metal around.
07:36You care to join?
07:36No, thanks.
07:37I'm going to go see my kid.
07:38Ah, good dad.
07:39You tell that Katie that if it took a campus sex scandal to finally get her old man up here?
07:44Worth it.
07:45Probably not going to tell her that.
07:47Thank you.
07:48Okay.
07:49All right.
07:50Hey, Greg.
07:51Yes.
07:51Thrilled you're here.
07:52Good to see you.
08:05With his water lilies, Monet eschewed tradition and focused on the surface of the pond at his home in Giverny.
08:11Beautiful, right?
08:12Hard to believe, but actually, conservators restored that exact painting with Q-tips and spits.
08:22Ew.
08:23Okay, you can take that slightly disgusting tidbit and get out of here, but there is a paper due on
08:27Monday.
08:28But there's a K-party this weekend.
08:30What is a K-party?
08:31You don't want to know.
08:31I don't want to know.
08:32Okay, if you feel like you need extra time on your paper, that is my dad.
08:36Interacting with strangers makes him very uncomfortable, so if you want extra time, look him in the eye and tell
08:41him that you love him.
08:42Okay?
08:46No, please don't do it.
08:47I love you very much.
08:49Okay.
08:51See you.
09:20Do you know what brown fat is?
09:24Answer honestly, and I promise this moment is over for you.
09:28Yes.
09:29Thank you.
09:30You're welcome.
09:31See?
09:32Okay.
09:33You know, the worst part is everybody keeps asking me what happened.
09:37I don't know what happened.
09:38We were normal, and then the next thing I know, he's with her, and I'm packing up and moving into
09:43the dead hockey coach's house.
09:44How did the hockey coach die?
09:46I think he killed himself because his father was focusing on the wrong part of the story.
09:50I'm sorry.
09:51I'm back.
09:51It wasn't on the ice, was it?
09:53Dad.
09:53I'm sorry.
09:54Go ahead.
09:55I feel like everybody's looking at me all the time.
09:57They're not looking at you.
09:58He wasn't looking at you.
09:59Oh, yep.
09:59He just did.
10:00I'm losing my grip, Dad.
10:01I hate it.
10:02Honey, you're not losing your grip.
10:05You are strong.
10:07Whoa.
10:09Honey, why are we in the bushes?
10:11That's them over there.
10:14They eat their lunch here sometimes.
10:16So you're stalking them.
10:18That's fine, hon.
10:20They never even kiss.
10:21And look at her.
10:22She's not like some model type.
10:23She's just like a normal girl.
10:25Oh, I just, it would make so much more sense to me if she was special in some way.
10:30Honey, maybe what makes her special is on the inside.
10:32You know, who she is as a person.
10:35Are you fucking kidding me?
10:36I'm sorry.
10:37What are you doing?
10:38I'm in the bushes.
10:39I'm off my game.
10:40Look, hon.
10:42There's something that I...
10:45Just look at me.
10:46Just look at me right now.
10:47What?
10:47Focus on what I'm saying because I'm something important.
11:00Not many women get to be with their father while they watch their husband make out with someone.
11:04Yeah, we're pretty lucky.
11:08Why would you come here?
11:09I knew you'd be...
11:14No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
11:24I wasn't watching you.
11:26I was watching a couple behind you kissing a straight couple.
11:30Dude.
11:31Not that that matters.
11:32It does.
11:33I was just clarifying.
11:34You don't have to take out your phone.
11:36That's...
11:37I'm out of here.
11:39See you later.
11:41See you later.
11:45See you later.
11:51Hey, there's that guy.
11:53You kicked ass today.
11:54Big fan.
11:55I love those rooster books.
11:56I read them all.
11:57Oh, thank you.
11:59You're the, uh, the bikini kid.
12:01Oh, Tommy Newton.
12:05Oh, shit.
12:06I forgot my wallet.
12:07That's stupid.
12:08No, no, no.
12:09Give me that.
12:09Really?
12:10I got you.
12:10Oh, sweet.
12:12Wait.
12:12I'm gonna get some chips too.
12:14I'm just kidding.
12:15Very kind.
12:15Thanks.
12:16It's okay.
12:17Got you.
12:17Again, I really appreciate it.
12:18No problem.
12:19There you go.
12:20Sweet.
12:20Enjoy it.
12:21Bonjour, mes amis.
12:22Hello.
12:23I said hello in French because I am betting that you are from Paris, where they let kids
12:28drink wine and babies smoke cigarettes, but here in America, the legal drinking age
12:32is 21.
12:34You're not 21?
12:35Not yet.
12:36Okay.
12:37Officer, he said that he forgot his wallet.
12:40He offered to buy me beer.
12:42Are you kidding me?
12:44Kind of an age-old story, isn't it?
12:45Kid gives you 20 bucks.
12:47You go inside and get him some beer.
12:48I don't need 20 bucks.
12:49Oh, okay.
12:50Money buckets.
12:51There's other reasons you might do it.
12:53What?
12:54For like a blowjob in the alley?
12:55What?
12:58No.
12:59I was thinking that you might do it because he seems like a good kid.
13:03Yes.
13:03Yes.
13:04Yes.
13:04That makes much more sense.
13:05But now I got this blowjob thing stuck in my head.
13:09And either you're giving it to him or he's giving it to you.
13:11Nobody's giving anyone a blowjob officer.
13:13But either way, that's all I can see right now.
13:14No, no.
13:14It was just a stupid remark.
13:16No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
13:17You don't just say something like that unless you're thinking it.
13:19Yeah, I agree.
13:20I disagree.
13:21I wholeheartedly disagree.
13:23Tommy Newton, come on.
13:27He didn't do anything.
13:28I tricked him.
13:30There you go.
13:31All right.
13:33Leave the beer and get out of here.
13:38Thanks for being a good kid.
13:41Even if it was just right at the end.
13:43I'm going to go ahead and take these right now.
13:45Okay.
13:46Stay out of the alleys.
13:53Okay.
13:55I'm going to take these right now.
14:09Yes.
14:10Yeah.
14:11Fuck it.
17:29They haven't even talked to each other.
17:32Archie is so gutless,
17:34he can't even look her in the eye
17:35and explain what happened.
17:38I just know what I want to do.
17:39I want to go over there
17:40and just tell him to man the heck up.
17:42I think you got to go with man the fuck up.
17:45I love you.
17:46Oh, hope you get an F.
17:48That's a long story.
17:50It doesn't matter.
17:51Because if I talked to him,
17:53Katie would kill me.
17:54No, she wouldn't.
17:55She'll love you for it.
17:56I don't think so.
17:57I mean, she wouldn't tell you.
17:59She loved you for it.
18:00And then she'll probably say she's mad at you.
18:05You didn't have to walk me all the way home.
18:08Oh, well, I'm glad I did, though.
18:09That was fun.
18:11Did I...
18:12You want to come in?
18:14Mm-hmm.
18:15You want to come in?
18:17Okay, in two weeks,
18:19my friend is going to be living right there.
18:21And I love her,
18:22but she is always all up in my business.
18:25So...
18:25Probably no more
18:28fucking the guest speakers for me.
18:31Wow.
18:33I've never done this before.
18:35I'm just kidding.
18:36I know.
18:38No, you didn't.
18:39No, I did not.
18:40No.
18:41Wow.
18:42Do you know how old I am?
18:44It's your lucky day, Grandpa.
18:51Oh, Dylan, you are gorgeous
18:56and funny
18:57and so, so smart
18:59that I feel even dumber than usual.
19:02But today has just been a day.
19:03Okay, we can stop.
19:04No, no, no, no.
19:05I was just saying,
19:06maybe we could just stand out here
19:07and talk for a little while.
19:08I really don't love talking to men
19:10who just rejected me.
19:11I didn't reject you.
19:12I just, I'm uncomfortable.
19:14And it's not you.
19:16It's me.
19:17I'm, that's who,
19:18that's what I am most of the time, always.
19:21So, maybe we could have a drink.
19:26Yeah.
19:27And kind of,
19:28kind of just see where it goes.
19:30Okay.
19:33Would you like to come in and have a drink?
19:37I probably shouldn't.
19:39What?
19:41Oh, crap.
19:42You just rejected me twice.
19:44Why would you do that?
19:45I don't know.
19:46I don't know why I do so many things.
19:48Good night.
19:48No, wait, Dylan.
19:50Dylan, Dylan.
19:51Come on.
19:52Oh, the key.
19:53The curse of the bent key.
19:55Come on.
19:56You could try it a little less psychotically.
19:58Okay, please just go.
19:59No, no, no.
20:00I wouldn't be a gentleman
20:01unless I waited for you to...
20:02Oh.
20:06Okay.
20:12Good night.
20:21Hey, Buck, you sure you don't want me to drive you?
20:23No, no, no.
20:24I got it.
20:25Hey, how come you need to go to the dentist?
20:27Um, because I hurt my arm.
20:30That's a joke.
20:31Relax.
20:31I'll be back later.
20:33Okay.
20:33Big push for a big girl.
20:34Yeah, see ya.
20:36Eyes on the horizon.
20:37Got it.
20:39Hello, Gov.
20:42Greg, I heard you're on campus.
20:44Come on.
20:50Just pop out on the coast for me, will ya?
20:57I understand that you're the first Russian studies professor
20:59to receive the Wallace Fellowship.
21:01You don't care about the fellowship?
21:03No.
21:03Nobody does.
21:04Well, yeah, my friends talk about it quite a lot, so...
21:07Name one.
21:07You don't know any of my friends?
21:09Well, just throw a name out.
21:10Kevin.
21:11I will bet you a million dollars
21:13that you can't tell me Kevin's last name.
21:16Listen, Greg, I know why you're here, all right?
21:19You love Chekhov, right?
21:21I was wrong.
21:22Yeah, I like Chekhov a bit.
21:24Don't you have that stupid first edition Chekhov book
21:26that you're so proud of?
21:28Tolstoy.
21:30First edition of War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy.
21:34Yes, I am rather proud of it.
21:35It's probably one of the finest literary creations
21:38any human being's ever made, so...
21:39Why did you cheat on my daughter?
21:41Sounds like you want to make love to that book.
21:42Okay.
21:43Could you just skip to the point, please, Greg?
21:45No, because I thought that you loved Chekhov,
21:48and I spent the morning researching him
21:50in preparation for this conversation.
21:52In the love of God, then,
21:53pretend that I'm a fan of Chekhov.
21:55Okay.
21:56Listen, since you love Chekhov so much,
21:58you obviously know that he said
22:00no one must be humiliated.
22:03I have been thinking about that a lot.
22:05How could you have been thinking about that a lot
22:07if you only just read it this morning?
22:08Are you a detective?
22:09Well...
22:10My God!
22:11Look, you need to man the fucking heck up.
22:17Katie has been humiliated,
22:19and I think that you owe it to her.
22:20And I love her.
22:24I do.
22:25I love her.
22:26Then what are you doing, man?
22:29I...
22:30I...
22:33I just...
22:34I got lost.
22:37We weren't getting along,
22:39and we drifted a bit,
22:41and I withdrew,
22:42and then along came Sonny,
22:44and the clouds...
22:45I'm cool not knowing anything about Sonny.
22:47Look,
22:49I am ready and willing to take the lion's share of the blame
22:52with what happened between me and Katie.
22:53You are a hero.
22:54Thank you.
22:55And also,
22:56your friend Kevin is not real.
22:58Katie and I both have things that we need to work on,
23:00and I want to do that work, Greg,
23:04because she is still the most important thing that's ever happened to me,
23:09and I think I've really cocked this up, haven't I?
23:12Yeah.
23:14And you cocked it up.
23:18Do you think she'll ever take me back?
23:20I wouldn't,
23:21but if you want to find out,
23:23you have to man the fuck up.
23:28You really nailed it that time.
23:30I don't need your approval.
23:31Okay.
23:32But thank you.
23:39Bobby Orr,
23:41native of Kitchener, Ontario.
23:43Who gives a shit?
23:44I cannot believe that you spoke to Archie.
23:46I was promised you'd eventually love me for it.
23:50He wants to see me tomorrow.
23:51He says that he thinks he's found a path back.
23:54All right.
23:54That's a good thing, yeah?
23:55Why?
23:56Because he's stopped banging that girl,
23:58so I'm supposed to run home and rip off all my clothes?
24:00I seriously doubt that that is his path back idea.
24:04I know you're mad.
24:05I have a question.
24:07Do you still love him?
24:13Shit.
24:15You know,
24:16I never really told you
24:17why your mom and I split up.
24:19She cheated on you.
24:20Oh, good.
24:21You're in the loop.
24:23No.
24:24Uh,
24:25my biggest regret
24:28was that I didn't fight for her.
24:32If you love him,
24:33don't be a coward
24:34like I was.
24:36If I say that I will go and see him,
24:38will you please stop telling me
24:40to do things that I don't want to do?
24:42Promise.
24:44Also, try to be kind.
24:46Jesus Christ.
24:47I,
24:47you're going to want to say some stuff
24:48that's really horrible to him
24:50and he deserves it.
24:51Yeah.
24:51but there are certain things
24:52that you can't take back, honey
24:54and I am speaking from experience.
24:58That's all.
24:59Go see him.
25:00Try to be kind.
25:02That's it.
25:03Okay.
25:03I'm going to head out.
25:05I love you.
25:06I will drop by tomorrow morning
25:09after I see Walt
25:10and say farewell.
25:12Dad,
25:14do you want to stay and hang?
25:18Always.
25:20Yes,
25:21I do.
25:23Okay.
25:3315 minutes at 185 degrees
25:35at least three times a week.
25:36Speeds up the metabolism,
25:38flushes out the toxins
25:39and is clinically proven
25:41to lower your chance of dementia
25:42by 53%
25:43and aren't you a lucky guy?
25:45You have all that fur
25:46to keep the heat in?
25:47Yeah,
25:47I feel lucky.
25:49Can't say I'm pleased
25:50you're turning down my job offer.
25:52Sorry.
25:53Has it been 15 minutes yet?
25:5590 seconds, Greg.
25:56Well,
25:56you're going to love the contrast
25:57with the cold plunge.
25:59I can't wait.
26:00I am happy to see things
26:01are turning the corner
26:02for Archie and Katie.
26:04Would have been ashamed
26:05to have to let her go.
26:07Excuse me?
26:07Well,
26:08this drama got out of hand.
26:09I had to pick one.
26:11He's got the tenure
26:12and the Wallace Fellowship.
26:14Nobody cares about that.
26:18Have you ever been married, Walt?
26:20I am married now.
26:21Wow.
26:22Oh,
26:23Joanie,
26:23she loves to travel.
26:24I don't.
26:25so we do two months together,
26:27two months apart
26:28and then we just repeat that
26:29the rest of the year.
26:30She'll be back in a few weeks.
26:32I can't wait.
26:34Sounds like you solved marriage.
26:37I have, Greg.
26:38Yeah,
26:39you're lucky.
26:41When you get your heart broken,
26:43it's,
26:44it's,
26:46ah,
26:46whatever.
26:47Never mind.
26:48You mean never mind?
26:50Number three,
26:51hot house is for real talk.
26:53You had that made up professionally?
26:56I made it
26:56in woodshop.
26:57Nice.
26:58Yeah.
27:01When you get your heart broken,
27:04it feels like somebody
27:05shot you in the face.
27:07It doesn't matter
27:08if it's been five years.
27:10You just,
27:12you feel like
27:13you're never gonna bounce back,
27:15you know?
27:18Can't let that happen to Katie.
27:21Hmm.
27:23All right.
27:25Ah, Katie.
27:26I'm not gonna sit down
27:28because I don't know
27:28where you guys have had sex,
27:29so I'm gonna pace.
27:30Right, okay.
27:31That's actually something
27:31I'd like to say to you.
27:32I wanted to say that
27:33to start off.
27:35No, no, no.
27:36If I can just go first.
27:37I'm trying really hard
27:38not to lose my shit here.
27:39And you're interrupting me
27:40is not helping.
27:41Please,
27:42sit down and shut up.
27:44Unfortunately,
27:45I was gonna say
27:46that you actually should start,
27:47but there's nothing
27:48that you could say
27:49that would help me understand
27:50how you could do this to me.
27:53And you didn't even
27:53try to explain yourself.
27:55Are you fucking serious?
27:56Trying to...
27:57Archie,
27:57that's when you get
27:58when those women
27:59on Dateline
27:59snap and poison their husbands
28:01because I have thought
28:02about killing you.
28:03And I know it's not smart
28:04to say out loud
28:05in case something weird happens
28:06and you do die.
28:07And then somebody else
28:08in the bar is like,
28:09well, I heard her talking
28:10about how she'd kill her husband,
28:11but we're not in a bar,
28:12so I feel pretty safe.
28:13I could so murder you.
28:14Good Lord.
28:17But my dad told me
28:18to be kind.
28:22I just don't know
28:22how to get there.
28:28I love you.
28:32And I think we can
28:33get through this.
28:40Okay.
28:44Now you talk.
28:54It doesn't matter
28:55what you say,
28:55just say something.
28:59She didn't go
28:59to the dentist.
29:01Okay,
29:01it matters a little.
29:02It can't just be gibberish.
29:03Sunny said
29:04that she was going
29:04to the dentist,
29:06but she went
29:06to the doctors.
29:07Well,
29:07dentists are doctors.
29:12She's pregnant.
29:15This is what I was
29:16trying,
29:17I just found out.
29:18I love you,
29:19Katie.
29:21I was going to beg
29:22for you to take me back.
29:23I have this speech
29:24where I explain everything,
29:25but I don't make any excuses.
29:26It's really good.
29:27I can still say it.
29:27Get out.
29:29Okay.
29:31This is my house.
29:33Please get out.
29:33Please get out.
29:34Please get out.
29:35Okay.
29:42I really do love you,
29:43Katie.
29:44Fuck you.
29:45Do you know
29:46how long you're going
29:46to be?
29:46Get out.
29:54Are you loving
29:55the contrast?
29:56You're activating
29:57the brown fat.
29:58Brown fat is not real.
29:59You don't mean that.
30:01I do.
30:01Now we're going to finish
30:02by you rolling
30:02under for five.
30:07I do.
30:13I don't like it.
30:14I don't like it.
30:15I take one,
30:17one,
30:17one because you left me
30:18and two,
30:19two,
30:20two for my family
30:21and three,
30:22three,
30:23three for my heartache
30:24and four,
30:25four,
30:26four for my headaches
30:27and five,
30:28five,
30:28five for my lonely
30:30and six,
30:31six,
30:31six for my sorrow
30:32and seven,
30:33seven,
30:34no tomorrow
30:35and eight,
30:36eight.
30:37eyes but get what
30:38eight was for
30:38but nine,
30:39nine,
30:39nine but we lost
30:40got ten,
30:41ten,
30:42ten,
30:43ten for everything,
30:44everything,
30:45everything,
30:45everything,
30:46everything.
30:49Oh,
30:50no,
30:52no,
30:52no,
30:52no,
30:52no.
30:59Oh,
31:02my God.
31:10Hey,
31:11Beth,
31:11I know you said
31:12that I didn't need
31:13to go see Katie
31:14but I did
31:14and I'm glad
31:16that I did
31:17and I am so,
31:18so cold.
31:21Call me when you can.
31:22Bye.
31:29Oh my gosh.
31:34Why would you make me
31:34talk to him?
31:36Hey,
31:36folks.
31:37Oh,
31:37no,
31:37this guy.
31:38I was with you
31:38all morning.
31:39Wait,
31:40what?
31:40Ma'am?
31:41Hello,
31:41job guy?
31:42Hey.
31:43You guys wouldn't
31:44happen to know
31:45what's going on
31:45here with this fire,
31:46would you?
31:47No.
31:48She was with me
31:49all morning.
31:51No,
31:51I wasn't.
31:52Huh.
31:53Seriously?
31:54Okay,
31:55so immediately
31:56conflicting stories.
31:58Why don't you
31:59both stay here?
31:59I'm gonna go grab
32:00my pen.
32:01Do not leave.
32:04Where's my pen?
32:06Who's got my pen?
32:10Shoot.
32:11I laugh at me,
32:12I'm crying,
32:13trying,
32:14falling,
32:15sometimes,
32:16sometimes,
32:17flying,
32:19cry me an ocean
32:20of one-liners,
32:22cruel,
32:23cruel,
32:24cruel,
32:25Cruel, cruel, cruel, cruel, cruel.
32:26A sticks and stones,
32:28you know the rhyme.
32:30You know it landed hard this time.
32:34Look who tried too hard to play it cool.
32:48I'll find a way to rewrite our beginnings.
33:01I'll find a way to rewrite our beginnings.
33:06Oh,
33:07I played the fool.
33:13I played the fool.
33:15I played the fool.
33:22I played the fool.
33:22I played the fool.
33:23I played the fool.
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