- 2 hours ago
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:25Jesus!
00:00:26Mom?
00:00:27Can you at least warn me when you're gonna do that?
00:00:30please oh please don't be such a child do you still have the wand of light
00:00:45see the all-powerful magic heirloom still safe and sound well you should be more careful the
00:00:51wand of light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires yeah and if it falls into
00:00:58the wrong hands it would become the most dangerous weapon in the world but a marriage to another
00:01:04noble witch family would only strengthen your power yeah unless it's an evil svensson right
00:01:12the svensons are our worst enemies leona do you know how much our family has suffered over the
00:01:18centuries because of them i know sorry you are the guardian of the wand of light leona and you
00:01:27can't reach your full potential until you marry and succeed me as head of the family come home with
00:01:34a husband next week or i will pick one for you what mom no please don't leona sherwood you are
00:01:42getting
00:01:42married whether you like the boy i pick or not mom understand
00:01:49don't worry mom i'm the responsible daughter remember
00:02:01okay leona sherwood this is your last weekend of freedom
00:02:09for two more nights
00:02:27i think you mean it's on the house right right it's on the house
00:02:57there you are little miss sherwood
00:03:06where the hell are you i'm in vegas like i said it would be old man
00:03:09hey don't you get smart with me you little
00:03:12remember your mission seduce the sherwood heir and marry her and then that whole obnoxious family
00:03:19will be there to pay off our debts you mean your debts
00:03:21quiet it's bad enough that i have a sorry excuse for an heir you are an embarrassment to the spence
00:03:28in
00:03:29name now if you don't marry the sherwood girl like i told you i am going to sell your little
00:03:35sister
00:03:35off the old fitzgerald to be his fourth wife dad secret is just a kid when i want your opinion
00:03:42i will
00:03:43ask for it until then you shut up and do as i say do you understand yeah i understand good
00:03:52and you keep
00:03:54practicing you sound god-awful the heartless bastard
00:04:13it's two of us you're saying you don't remember me who remembers shipment in his dumb teens anyways
00:04:20no way totally i love that show i watched it in one sitting at like 2 a.m this is
00:04:26one of my favorites
00:04:27it definitely doesn't get the love that it deserves but i think it's one of the best ones really
00:04:33i never begged you for a sappy romance kind of guy looks can be deceiving
00:04:44the wand of light so it does exist maybe i'm just jaded it's hard to believe that love like
00:04:51that actually exists in real life why not we're witches monsters and magic exist in our world why
00:04:58can't true love i am lily by the way lily collins eric phillips nice to meet you lily collins damn
00:05:12he's
00:05:13hot and i'm in vegas i deserve a little fun well eric phillips i'll be in the poker room tonight
00:05:21maybe maybe i'll see you there mate maybe i'll see you there mate
00:05:42okay svenston don't fuck this up
00:05:59eric motherfucking svenston excuse me you ghost me for three months after sleeping with me and you
00:06:05think you can sit there and act like nothing happened i think you've got me confused with
00:06:08someone else don't gaslight me svenston i know exactly who you are
00:06:26you know who she is i think she's got me confused with someone else
00:06:35thank you
00:06:43you're nervous not at all you can always fold you know i'd hate to send you home empty-handed
00:06:53not a chance i'm here to win you sure seems like your focus is somewhere else
00:07:01oh i am very focused
00:07:07are you guys done making google eyes at each other or what
00:07:12you're full of shit phillips i call yeah there is no way that you have this
00:07:18but don't worry i'll let you go another round once i beat you actually i think i'm about to hit
00:07:25the
00:07:26jackpot
00:07:29eric
00:07:49i have wanted to do that since i saw you by the pool in your bikini
00:07:53eric everyone can see do you want me to stop
00:08:02oh
00:08:13let him watch give him a shower
00:08:28oh wait wait please don't stop
00:08:31lose your words tell me what you want i want your tongue inside me please that's a good girl
00:08:45eric
00:08:49wait wait i think i'm gonna
00:08:53was that some kind of vision
00:08:58no that was from him
00:09:08lucky son of a bitch
00:09:10beginner lux
00:09:12let's see you do it again next hand
00:09:14no can do
00:09:16i have a date with a very pretty lady
00:09:24why do i have the feeling that you're not exactly as you present
00:09:29eric phillips
00:09:31it is vegas
00:09:32it is vegas
00:09:33isn't that part of the fun
00:09:46no
00:09:46no
00:09:47it wasn't very nice of you
00:09:49to tease me with your strap of your dress during our game
00:09:52hmm
00:09:54hmm
00:09:54it's very distracting
00:09:57well you know it wasn't very nice of you
00:10:00to send me that little vision during our game
00:10:02i just wanted to give you a little sneak preview
00:10:14eric
00:10:14eric there are people
00:10:15and if you're quiet
00:10:17they won't see you
00:10:21i should stop
00:10:22this wasn't how the plan was supposed to go
00:10:24you knew you were right before
00:10:26i'm not who i say i am
00:10:28and who out there is exactly as they present
00:10:32but i am
00:10:33look i don't care who you are outside of this
00:10:36for once in my life i i just want to forget about everything
00:10:42just live in the moment
00:10:44and i think you
00:10:47can help me do that
00:10:55remove the camouflage
00:10:57i want you to see you
00:10:59the real you
00:11:02but then you'll know who i am
00:11:04i already know who you are
00:11:07the real you
00:11:09wants to let go
00:11:15no one's ever looked at me like that
00:11:18he really wants me
00:11:20the real me
00:11:21fuck
00:11:23you are gorgeous
00:11:27i want you eric
00:11:30i need you
00:11:35spread your legs for me
00:11:41keep your eyes open
00:11:44i want you to watch yourself come
00:11:47all over my fingers
00:11:53keep your eyes open
00:11:59i thought you said that they couldn't hear me
00:12:02they can't if you stay quiet
00:12:04keep your eyes open or i'll stop
00:12:11that's a good girl
00:12:13look down at my head
00:12:19oh my god they hurt me
00:12:21i can't
00:12:23i can't
00:12:23just relax
00:12:24i can't eric
00:12:27it's okay
00:12:29don't think
00:12:30just fail
00:12:33tell me how you feel
00:12:35so good
00:12:36but i need more
00:12:38eric
00:12:41i can't wait to put my mouth on you
00:12:48so i'm going to make you come
00:12:51i'll beat you there
00:12:53i'm going to go down
00:12:54i want you to scream my name
00:12:57and let it come
00:12:57five
00:12:59four
00:13:01three
00:13:03two
00:13:07four
00:13:28i can't believe i just came on his hand
00:13:31in front of other people
00:13:33i think this is your floor
00:13:41i'll be at the fountain tomorrow at eight o'clock
00:13:45if you decided that you want more see you there
00:13:58how did he know what floor i was on
00:14:05so you've told me all about your wild sister and the things that she's done
00:14:11what about you
00:14:15i'm the responsible sister
00:14:17the boring one if you will
00:14:20and i do what i'm supposed to do all the rules and all that good stuff
00:14:25i don't believe you
00:14:27i mean
00:14:28i know how you are in an elevator
00:14:29oh come on
00:14:32come on
00:14:34it's vegas
00:14:35let me be your bad influence
00:14:37just for tonight
00:14:40so
00:14:42any bad ideas
00:14:47just one
00:14:54what are you doing
00:15:11no games
00:15:13just fuck me already
00:15:14i thought i would try to woo you first
00:15:16consider me rude
00:15:17you think we could take it slow
00:15:19oh your lips say one thing
00:15:21but your body says something else
00:15:35wait
00:15:37shit
00:15:39i almost lost my cool
00:15:40i gotta remember the plan
00:15:44oh my god
00:15:45i can't believe i just did that
00:15:47that was so embarrassing
00:15:48this is why i don't do crazy
00:15:49shit that was way too much
00:15:51hey
00:15:52you're never too much
00:15:54you don't understand eric
00:15:55okay if my family saw me do any of that they would freak out
00:15:59tonight's not about your family
00:16:01tonight's about you remember
00:16:03forget what everyone else has told you to do
00:16:06do something that you want to do
00:16:08something no one would expect
00:16:10maybe he's right
00:16:12i've spent my whole life doing what my family's told me to do
00:16:18for once in my life
00:16:20i'm doing something for myself
00:16:22she spotted the chapel
00:16:25just like i planned
00:16:29so are you uh
00:16:30be sure about this marriage thing
00:16:32it's only temporary
00:16:33okay and old magic is weak
00:16:35the the hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning
00:16:39so are you ready for a holy matrimony
00:16:42i'm ready if you're ready
00:16:45come on
00:16:49let's go
00:16:55you nervous
00:16:58just never been married before
00:17:07uh it's my sister i need to take this
00:17:09oh yeah take your time elvis here wants me to pick out a hand fest bouquet
00:17:13hey mama let's get some flowers for you come on
00:17:15let's do it
00:17:17you need to come home now i can't secret
00:17:20eric dad's up to something he invited bit cyril to the house and made me dress up he looks at
00:17:26me
00:17:27weird it really freaks me out you were my big brother e i need you here listen i can't leave
00:17:33right now but i promise when i come home i'll have enough power to get rid of dad forever okay
00:17:41hey
00:17:43is everything okay
00:17:45yeah
00:17:48yeah
00:17:48yeah it's fine
00:17:51you uh
00:17:52you sure about this
00:17:54it's only temporary
00:17:56come on we'll be laughing about this for years
00:18:02let's
00:18:14let's go
00:18:18right only temporary unless you get hand fasted under a full moon then the hand fast bond is
00:18:25nearly unbreakable but she doesn't know that and once she does she'll hate me
00:18:31is your sister okay is something wrong nothing's wrong we're about to get buried in vegas by ovis
00:18:40what could possibly be wrong
00:18:43all right you ready to rock and roll you hunk a hunk a hot couple let's get this show started
00:19:18i have the wand of light
00:19:20the most powerful object in the world if i leave now
00:19:24i could use it to take control away from my father set secret and i free
00:19:35but i already betrayed her once
00:19:56and i know i have to get this show up
00:20:07but i have to miss my father
00:20:07no
00:20:07no
00:20:07no
00:20:07no
00:20:07no
00:20:07no
00:20:07no
00:20:19I'll have to get more chocolate strawberries.
00:20:21Be back soon.
00:20:32It's only temporary.
00:20:33Okay, and old magic is weak.
00:20:35The hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning.
00:20:38Hmm, that's weird.
00:20:41The mark should have worn off by now.
00:20:51So, did you marry the girl yet?
00:20:57No, it's...
00:20:59Complicated.
00:21:00Complicated?
00:21:01Or distracted?
00:21:03You were sent there to marry the Sherwood heir and bind her power to this family, not to play house.
00:21:10You're a Svensson.
00:21:11Act like one.
00:21:12Eric is a Svensson?
00:21:15I married my family's worst enemy?
00:21:18I don't need you to tell me what I am.
00:21:21Then stop hesitating.
00:21:23If the rumors about the wand of light are true, we might catch an even bigger prize.
00:21:28So hurry up and marry the Sherwood girl and then bring her to me, idiot.
00:21:41He's been lying this whole time.
00:21:49I need to tell her the truth.
00:21:53You lying piece of cruel shit!
00:21:56You didn't want me.
00:21:57You just wanted the fucking wand, didn't you?
00:22:01I didn't even know the wand existed until I met you.
00:22:03You still lied to me, Eric.
00:22:05You knew I was a Sherwood from the start.
00:22:07That's why you gave me a fake fucking name, right?
00:22:09Okay, I did, but that was before we...
00:22:11You lied before, before you decided to mess with me?
00:22:13Get your dick wet before you ruin me and my family forever?
00:22:17I'm not trying to ruin your family.
00:22:18I'm trying to save mine.
00:22:19I know all about you, Svensons.
00:22:22All you do is lie and cheat and steal to get whatever you fucking want.
00:22:27I should have caught it at the poker table, but your little tricks won't work on me this time.
00:22:32The hand fast, Mark, it'll fade.
00:22:35Just like you, just like whatever this was.
00:22:38The hand fast wasn't a trick.
00:22:39Not that part.
00:22:41Not with you.
00:22:42It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:22:45You will never, ever get the wand.
00:22:49Lily, what?
00:22:51When this fades, Eric, I will never have to see you again.
00:23:08So, that didn't happen.
00:23:12My older sister Effie told me that the mark would fade a week later.
00:23:17Then a month went by, then, well...
00:23:25See, this is why you don't fuck with old magic.
00:23:27It's all fun and games, so there's a full moon.
00:23:30Then it's the most powerful magic in the universe.
00:23:37Apparently, getting a hand fast married under a full moon creates a bond that's almost unbreakable.
00:23:44Also, apparently, the almost part means that both people have to perform the divorce spell.
00:23:51I tried calling, texting, sending flying monkeys, nothing, not a single word from my beloved husband for half a year.
00:24:12Yes, I still sleep with a wand under my pillow.
00:24:16The emotional ass whooping I got from my mother for getting hand fasted to a stranger was bad enough.
00:24:21No one can ever find out that I almost lost the wand, too.
00:24:26I just need one night to sleep without thinking about him.
00:24:54Who are you?
00:24:55What do you want with the wand of light?
00:24:58Nothing. I'm just here to collect my payday from my client once I bring him that wand.
00:25:04Payday? Someone sent you! Who?
00:25:08I'm afraid I can't break client confidentiality. Sorry, sweetie.
00:25:12Well, I'm afraid that you chose the wrong witch to fuck with tonight.
00:25:20No!
00:25:25No!
00:25:26No!
00:25:26No!
00:25:27No!
00:25:27No!
00:25:27No!
00:25:29Be wise not to fight back, witch.
00:25:31You're in over your head.
00:25:34I'd rather die than let you take the wand!
00:25:39Suits yourself.
00:25:44Suit yourself.
00:25:53What the f**k?
00:26:08Get off me! She had the wand!
00:26:11I got the wand. I'll get the rest later.
00:26:16No!
00:26:20You are the reason I lost the wand. Who are you?
00:26:29The hand fast mark.
00:26:34Hello wife. Miss me?
00:26:39What are you doing here?
00:26:41I thought I'd spice up our marriage, do a little role playing, but it looks like you were more into
00:26:46bondage. I didn't know you were so kinky.
00:26:48Shut up!
00:26:53You should be thanking me. I did just save your house.
00:26:55I'm thanking you. You're the reason my family's most powerful heirloom is gone. How did you even find me?
00:27:02Wait a minute.
00:27:04You were trying to steal the wand too, weren't you?
00:27:07Maybe.
00:27:09God, you slimy, tote-faced motherfucker!
00:27:13Okay, first you tricked me into marrying you, then you ghost me for six months, and now you come in
00:27:18here like a goddamn fucking cartoon burglar and try to take my wand!
00:27:23Look, I was just gonna borrow it!
00:27:25Yeah, for one of your dirty, no-good-spensing schemes?
00:27:29I just... I need it, okay? It's... it's the only way that we can be free.
00:27:35Look, my dad doesn't know about our marriage. Not yet. But he knows about the wand. If he gets a
00:27:41hold of it, he's gonna sell it to the highest bidder.
00:27:43Whoever controls the wand has the power to take over the world. Or... worse.
00:27:47No! Worse than tricking me into marrying you?
00:27:50I told you that that wasn't a trick.
00:27:52It doesn't matter, Eric. She has the wand! That shadow thief or whatever! And that's your fault!
00:27:59I can get it back!
00:28:02Look, I know I don't deserve it. But just... give me one more chance.
00:28:06I can get the wand back, take care of what I need to take care of, and then I'll do
00:28:10the divorce spell.
00:28:11Please, Lili, just... give me one more chance. Please.
00:28:15I can't trust him. I shouldn't.
00:28:19But my gut tells me... this time... it might be different.
00:28:29No.
00:28:31No, we're both gonna go get it.
00:28:34It is my job as a Sherwood heir to set things right.
00:28:37So I don't let the wand fall into the wrong hands.
00:28:41And you really think after Vegas, I would let you go alone to find the most powerful magical object in
00:28:46the entire world?
00:28:48Fair. Uh, whatever you want. Lili.
00:28:52God, I hate when you call me that.
00:28:54All right. I'll call you wife.
00:28:57And you can call me whatever you want.
00:29:00Eric, husband, daddy...
00:29:02Shut up! Don't call me wife either.
00:29:04After we get this wand, we will do the divorce spell. Got it?
00:29:08You're breaking my heart. I mean, you're the better half of my soul.
00:29:12Yeah. You're not gonna sweet-talk your way into my pants again, Eric.
00:29:16We'll see.
00:29:22Now, the wand forbids a direct tracking spell, so we have to track its trail.
00:29:27That's a ten-mile radius. We'll never find the wand inside that circle.
00:29:31Well, with the tracking spell, I get a location, okay?
00:29:34It doesn't last long, though. We'll have like three or four days.
00:29:37Well, lucky for you, I already packed your bags.
00:29:42Consider it our official honeymoon.
00:29:48Agilis, we're done. You got it?
00:29:50Don't go back on your words, Venson. We will do the divorce spell.
00:29:54Cross my heart. Hope to die.
00:30:15You magicked a car here?
00:30:17This isn't just any car.
00:30:25This is Bessie.
00:30:26You really expect us to track down the most powerful, magical object in the world?
00:30:32In a car without a roof?
00:30:34I mean, if you're not comfortable,
00:30:40I could go by myself.
00:30:42If you trust me not to run away.
00:30:46I wouldn't trust you with a half-eaten newt muffin.
00:30:49I was gonna throw in the trash.
00:30:53Then your chariot awaits.
00:30:55Wife.
00:31:15We've been driving all day, and she hasn't said a single word.
00:31:24We've been driving all day, and she hasn't said a single word.
00:31:30You're Svensson. You don't play house with sheriffs.
00:31:33Wait, why are we turning?
00:31:35We don't have any time. We have to find the wand, Eric.
00:31:39That circle is getting further and further away.
00:31:41Plus, it's getting dark. We need to stay somewhere for the night.
00:31:44Why don't you just let me drive?
00:31:45Because you haven't slept either.
00:31:47Plus, no one can drive Bessie but me.
00:31:51What is with guys and cars? Jesus.
00:31:53No. I mean literally, no one else can drive Bessie.
00:31:57My great-great-grandfather put a hex on all of our possessions.
00:32:00Anyone that's non-blood related can't touch it.
00:32:03The Svensons like to hoard their treasures.
00:32:06Your family has issues.
00:32:08Finally. Something we can agree on.
00:32:11Was this your plan all along?
00:32:13Make me feel bad for you because your family's evil,
00:32:15so I get all ooey gooey and forget about the divorce?
00:32:18Not everyone in my family is evil.
00:32:21Yeah. Okay.
00:32:35You cross this wall or do anything to piss me off more than you already have,
00:32:39then you do not even want to imagine the hex I'm going to put on you.
00:32:48I promise, no funny business.
00:32:52Pinky promise.
00:32:53Your mirrored powers.
00:33:12Good night to you two.
00:33:28In Vegas, you said you had a sister, right?
00:33:34Yeah, Sigrid.
00:33:38She didn't ask to be a Sphinxen.
00:33:41She's different than us.
00:33:42Better.
00:33:44Not like you?
00:33:46No.
00:33:48Not like me.
00:33:50But you already know that.
00:34:12No.
00:34:13No.
00:34:18No.
00:34:20No.
00:34:21No.
00:34:22No.
00:34:23No.
00:34:24No.
00:34:36No.
00:34:38No.
00:34:42No.
00:34:47No.
00:34:48No.
00:34:49No.
00:34:50No.
00:34:56No.
00:35:12No.
00:35:13No.
00:35:20No.
00:35:23No.
00:35:27No.
00:35:27No.
00:35:29No.
00:35:30No.
00:35:31No.
00:35:33No.
00:35:36No.
00:35:37No.
00:35:51No.
00:36:03No.
00:36:03No.
00:36:03No.
00:36:03No.
00:36:05No.
00:36:05No.
00:36:05No.
00:36:05No.
00:36:06No.
00:36:06No.
00:36:07No.
00:36:09No.
00:36:18Look, I'm so close
00:36:25That's it, Lily
00:36:27Be a good girl
00:36:29And go for me
00:36:37Are you ready?
00:36:42Oh, Eric
00:36:57You said that you wouldn't look
00:37:01I don't need to look to know what you were doing
00:37:04While thinking about me
00:37:07God, you are so full of yourself
00:37:09Do I know what I heard?
00:37:11Say another word and I'll turn you into a frog
00:37:16Were you thinking about that time in Vegas
00:37:20Where I ate you out in the shower
00:37:23And you came so hard
00:37:25You almost crushed my skull between your thighs
00:37:29I think about those times a lot
00:37:32Yeah, well, I don't think about them at all
00:37:59You still haven't even told me what you want the wand for yet?
00:38:02It's on a need-to-know basis
00:38:04Oh, don't you think I need to know?
00:38:08I am your wife, after all
00:38:10Oh, now you remember you're my wife
00:38:12Funny how you only remember that when it's convenient for you
00:38:15I remember every time I think about how badly I fucked up in Vegas
00:38:18So all I am is a mistake
00:38:20If I remember right
00:38:21You're the one that suggested that we get handfast married
00:38:24Obviously that was before I knew about all your bullshit and lies
00:38:29Duty and responsibility might not be a big deal in your family
00:38:32But in mine, it's huge
00:38:34See? There you go again
00:38:36Always worried about what your family wants
00:38:37It's never about what you want
00:38:39I follow the rules because I have to, Eric
00:38:42If I don't, I end up in situations like this
00:38:45Did you ever stop to think that maybe that's unfair?
00:38:48That maybe your ideas and their ideas are bullshit?
00:38:52You ever think of that?
00:38:54Spoken like a true Spinson
00:38:56Well, you're a Spinson too, sweetheart
00:38:58Not much longer, I can tell you that
00:39:19I'm gonna get some coffee
00:39:21It's getting dark
00:39:21You really think you should be alone?
00:39:23So now that we're married
00:39:24You think you have to babysit me too?
00:39:30Fine, just don't take too long
00:39:35You got her in the car or what?
00:39:38Who?
00:39:38Don't play dumb with me, boy
00:39:40The little Sherwood witch you married
00:39:43I forgot to tell me about
00:39:46You thought I wouldn't find out, huh?
00:39:48You did a good job of hiding it, I'll give you that
00:39:51Maybe you are my son after all, huh?
00:39:54What's the end game here?
00:39:56You said you just needed to get the Sherwood's wand
00:39:58So you could pay off your debts
00:39:59What does she have to do with it?
00:40:00Because I'm not an idiot like you
00:40:02I'll finally have all the leverage I need over the Sherwood family
00:40:07When I tell them their pretty little heir is my new daughter-in-law
00:40:11And then it'll be our family that gets to call the shots in the magic world
00:40:16So you just want to use her?
00:40:18Like you use mom?
00:40:19Like you're using your own daughter
00:40:21This is not a request, boy
00:40:23Bring the girl and the wand to me or you will be stripped of your name
00:40:28Your magic, everything
00:40:29And your sister, she'll be the one paying the price for your mistakes
00:40:44This isn't right, the trail should still be here
00:40:48Would you like some coffee, Miss Sherwood?
00:40:50Yeah, thank you
00:40:51Wait, how did you know my...
00:40:55You...
00:40:58But the map said that...
00:41:00That's cute
00:41:01You think that dusty old map could track me?
00:41:09That wand is mine
00:41:14Not anymore, it's not
00:41:15And sadly, my employers need your powers, too
00:41:18Employer?
00:41:21Hold still
00:41:23This will only hurt a bit
00:41:25No, stop!
00:41:26Stop!
00:41:34Get away from her!
00:41:40Eric, the wand!
00:41:53My magic
00:41:55She took half of my magic, Eric!
00:41:57You're okay, I got you
00:42:00You're okay
00:42:03I don't understand
00:42:04The map said that the wand was miles away
00:42:07What did she want with my powers?
00:42:09Thief must have found some way to bypass the tracking spell
00:42:13She can't have gone far, we'll find her
00:42:14Lay low for now
00:42:16Eric, stop the car, I can't breathe
00:42:19Okay
00:42:29Hey, hey, hey
00:42:30Look at me, look at me
00:42:31You're okay
00:42:32You're okay
00:42:33Just breathe
00:42:34I got you
00:42:35I got you
00:42:36You're safe
00:42:37I thought she was gonna kill me, Eric
00:42:41I'm not gonna let that happen
00:42:43Not while I'm breathing
00:42:57I still hate you
00:43:01If you hated me
00:43:03You wouldn't let me touch you like this
00:43:05This doesn't change anything
00:43:08It's only scratching an itch
00:43:10Once we get the wand
00:43:12And we do the divorce spell
00:43:14Now we forget each other existed
00:43:20Is that what you want, Lily?
00:43:23You wanna forget how good I make you feel?
00:43:26You wanna forget
00:43:27I'm the only person in the whole fucking world
00:43:30Who can make you feel this way?
00:43:36Eric
00:43:40Wait, wait, wait, wait
00:43:47We can't do this
00:43:50This is what goes wrong between us
00:43:52We can't make that mistake again
00:43:54We have a job to do, Eric
00:43:56Let's get the wand
00:43:57That's it
00:43:59And then what?
00:44:01You know what happens after, Eric
00:44:03We do the divorce spell
00:44:05And we never see each other again
00:44:39Smells like fresh baked pastries
00:44:41Cinnamon
00:44:44Old magic
00:44:48I should have known
00:44:50It's a Seder's inn
00:44:53That smell
00:44:55Momen inhabitous smell
00:44:57It's woven into places like this
00:44:59For couples
00:45:02You mean or cheese?
00:45:05Seder's are the horniest bastards
00:45:07In the known world
00:45:07It lowers any fear
00:45:11Doubt
00:45:12Shame
00:45:13Grants of your deepest desires
00:45:16Without any fear of
00:45:18Judgment
00:45:19Judgment
00:45:20Or consequences
00:45:23Consequences
00:45:28Here I don't
00:45:30I'm trying not to
00:45:40Here I don't
00:45:44I'm trying not to
00:45:50I'm trying not to
00:45:51The spell
00:45:53Doesn't create desire
00:45:54It lets go of the lies
00:45:57Tells us what we really want
00:45:59What I want
00:46:00What I want doesn't matter
00:46:02It matters in here
00:46:05Tell me what you really want
00:46:07You can say goodbye
00:46:09And go our separate ways
00:46:11Or you can tell me you want this
00:46:14You want me
00:46:17Tell me to stay
00:46:22Stay here
00:46:23Please
00:46:25God what is this
00:46:27Is this just the magic
00:46:28No
00:46:32It's not the spell
00:46:34It's freedom
00:46:37In here the outside world
00:46:38Doesn't matter
00:46:39Just you
00:46:41And me
00:46:44I shouldn't want this
00:46:45I know
00:46:48I shouldn't be doing this
00:46:53Or this
00:46:55Be able to share with
00:46:57To the most respected family
00:46:59Of the whole rich world
00:47:01You definitely shouldn't sound
00:47:03This fucking sexy
00:47:05To mine
00:47:07You know the ear
00:47:08To the Sherwood family
00:47:12Who are you
00:47:13I want you
00:47:15Eric
00:47:16I need you
00:47:20Tell me who you are
00:47:23Lily
00:47:24Close
00:47:29But not quite
00:47:32Tonight
00:47:33Tell me who you are
00:47:35Your wife
00:47:59Your wife
00:48:01This doesn't change anything
00:48:03I know
00:48:05We can have tonight
00:48:06And then
00:48:07Tomorrow we go back
00:48:08To who we are
00:48:08On the outside
00:48:10Sure
00:48:11I'll go back
00:48:12To being my bad self
00:48:13And you can
00:48:13Go back to pretending
00:48:14To be a good little witch
00:48:17Excuse me
00:48:17Don't deny
00:48:19Lily
00:48:19Share what's been said
00:48:20I know
00:48:21I know
00:48:21I know what kind of dork
00:48:23Naughty thoughts you have
00:48:26I don't
00:48:28It's okay to be bad
00:48:31You don't have to pretend
00:48:34I don't, huh?
00:48:39You know
00:48:40Just because I have
00:48:41Half my magic
00:48:41Doesn't mean
00:48:42I can't play with you
00:48:43For tonight
00:48:55Now you're gonna sit there
00:48:58Like a good
00:48:59Little
00:49:01Witch
00:49:06And I'm
00:49:08And until
00:49:09Whatever
00:49:10I
00:49:12Want
00:49:14To you
00:49:18I don't remember
00:49:20Packing that lingerie
00:49:21Close your eyes
00:49:25Eric, you're so good
00:49:27For being such a bad boy
00:49:30I am
00:49:31Being properly motivated
00:49:35Not to move
00:49:38See how long
00:49:39It takes you to break
00:49:41For you
00:49:42I could stay here forever
00:49:43Pretty to think so
00:49:45Why don't we test
00:49:46That little theory
00:49:47Huh?
00:49:48We're playing
00:49:49A dangerous
00:49:50Game
00:49:51All you have to do
00:49:55Is admit that I win
00:49:57I'll let you fuck me
00:49:59I'll even
00:50:01Let you come
00:50:02Wherever you want
00:50:06You can come
00:50:07Here
00:50:09Or here
00:50:12How even
00:50:14That you come
00:50:16In here
00:50:17God
00:50:18Come on
00:50:20I know you wanna
00:50:22Just admit
00:50:24That I'm right
00:50:27Fine
00:50:29You win
00:50:30Oh, what was that?
00:50:32You hurt me
00:50:34Oh
00:50:43So what's my prize?
00:50:47I could
00:50:48Torture you
00:50:50Like you did me
00:50:53But I wanna be inside you
00:50:55I wanna feel you
00:50:56Squeeze me tight
00:50:59And take me to bed
00:51:00Good husband
00:51:04Call me that again
00:51:07You want me to fuck you
00:51:09Husband?
00:51:10Yeah
00:51:11Fuck me
00:51:20Tell me a story
00:51:24Like the ones you did
00:51:25In Vegas
00:51:27I've got a story about
00:51:29My pet goat Gilmore
00:51:30And how he got stuck
00:51:33On a magic carpet
00:51:34Or this story about
00:51:36How my sister tried to
00:51:37Negotiate with a troll
00:51:39Using only red emits
00:51:40I don't know
00:51:41I already know
00:51:43About your family
00:51:47I wanna know
00:51:48About you
00:51:50What's it like
00:51:51To be a Svensson heir
00:51:52You want the
00:51:53Insider info
00:51:54Mm
00:51:55Mm
00:51:56You tell me yours
00:51:57I'll tell you mine
00:51:58You gonna tell me
00:51:59How wonderful it was
00:52:01Growing up as a
00:52:02Beloved
00:52:02And blessed
00:52:03Sherwood
00:52:07Is that what you think
00:52:08Being a show
00:52:09What is like
00:52:11Is that what you think
00:52:12Being a show
00:52:13What is like
00:52:13All fun and rainbows
00:52:16Yeah
00:52:16Everybody loves your family
00:52:17That's not true
00:52:19Eric
00:52:19There are so many people
00:52:21Who would love it
00:52:22If we just disappeared
00:52:23My mother has been
00:52:24Shouldering all that
00:52:26Responsibility and pressure
00:52:27For decades
00:52:27And next year
00:52:29I will be the
00:52:30Head witch in charge
00:52:32Everyone's counting on me
00:52:33To do the right thing
00:52:33Like eat your fruits
00:52:35And veggies
00:52:35Like spending my whole
00:52:37Childhood being told
00:52:38That the whole world
00:52:39Depended on me
00:52:41Like never bothering
00:52:43To have any hopes
00:52:44Or dreams
00:52:45Because my whole life
00:52:47Was planned for me
00:52:47From the very start
00:52:48Before I was even born
00:52:50I'm always doing
00:52:51The right thing
00:52:51For the family
00:52:52I was never allowed
00:52:53To even think
00:52:54Of doing the wrong thing
00:52:56I couldn't be tired
00:52:57I couldn't be scared
00:52:59I couldn't be angry
00:53:00One mistake
00:53:01And my family
00:53:02Loses everything
00:53:03That they've ever worked for
00:53:04If this whole world
00:53:05Fades to black
00:53:06It's because I
00:53:07Messed up
00:53:08It's because I
00:53:09Didn't do a good job
00:53:13I don't think I've ever
00:53:14Said that out loud before
00:53:16I'm glad you did
00:53:19Your turn
00:53:21Growing up
00:53:22A Svinson was
00:53:24A little different
00:53:26The old man likes to say
00:53:27I was
00:53:28The first of his
00:53:30Disappointments
00:53:31I guess
00:53:32I guess it's good
00:53:33At least I was
00:53:34First at something
00:53:36I didn't care
00:53:37About disappointing him
00:53:38I just wanted
00:53:39To get away from him
00:53:41I had it all planned out
00:53:42When
00:53:43I turned 16
00:53:44I'd leave
00:53:45Change my name
00:53:46And the Svinson bloodline
00:53:47Would die with me
00:53:48My mom died
00:53:49When Secret was born
00:53:53My dad used her
00:53:54Against me
00:53:56Every day since
00:54:02I'm so sorry
00:54:04Eric
00:54:04I
00:54:06You shouldn't have asked
00:54:09It's okay
00:54:11Svinsons have always lived
00:54:12In the Sherwood shadows
00:54:14We are the shadows
00:54:18All you do is shine
00:54:30You always ask me
00:54:31What I want
00:54:34What do you want
00:54:36Eric
00:54:39You'd hate me
00:54:39If I told you
00:54:41I mean
00:54:42More than you already do
00:54:46I don't hate you
00:54:49I never did
00:55:15I don't hate you
00:55:25Eric
00:55:26Something's wrong
00:55:27Dad's
00:55:27Got
00:55:28Visitors
00:55:28A bunch of old guys
00:55:30I don't know who they are
00:55:31He made me play piano
00:55:32For them
00:55:33Like some kind of
00:55:33Dress of doll
00:55:35It's like
00:55:35Freaking me out
00:55:41Eric
00:55:43Are you safe?
00:55:48Eric
00:55:49Are you safe?
00:55:50For now
00:55:51All those weird old men
00:55:54Lived last night
00:55:55And I hexed my door
00:55:57So no one could get in
00:55:58Don't let anyone in
00:55:59If dad tries to get you
00:56:00To play with any of those
00:56:01Weird old men
00:56:01Just
00:56:02I know
00:56:03I'll just
00:56:04Do what he says
00:56:06I always do
00:56:08I'm so sick of this
00:56:09I'm so sick of this E
00:56:09What if he actually does
00:56:11Make me marry one of those guys
00:56:12I'm never gonna let that happen
00:56:14I'm never gonna let that happen
00:56:14All right
00:56:15Look
00:56:16I'm close to getting the wand of light
00:56:19The wand of light?
00:56:21Like
00:56:22The one from the fairy tales?
00:56:24You can't tell dad
00:56:25Secret
00:56:26When I get the wand
00:56:28Be ready for my call
00:56:30I have a plan
00:56:31I barely know basic spells
00:56:35I don't know
00:56:35You can
00:56:37I know you can
00:56:39When time is right
00:56:40You'll be ready
00:57:07Filling up Bessie
00:57:08Meet me downstairs
00:57:09When you're ready
00:57:19Oh my god
00:57:21Why do you and mom
00:57:23Always do that?
00:57:24A bit high strung
00:57:25Aren't you sis?
00:57:27I was just in the middle
00:57:29Of thinking
00:57:29Yeah
00:57:30And going by your aura
00:57:31I can guess about who
00:57:32Very much giving
00:57:34Post-orgasmic afterglow
00:57:36Aw
00:57:36Yeah
00:57:37Well you and your little aura reading
00:57:38Can go jump in a lake
00:57:40Oh
00:57:40Aren't we feisty this morning
00:57:42Your super hot hubby isn't around I'm guessing
00:57:45Or have you already murdered him after catching his dick?
00:57:48I know all the best places to hide a body by the way
00:57:52I'm fine
00:57:53I'm fine Effie
00:57:54I know all about Eric Spenson
00:57:55I'm not stupid
00:57:57And when we get the wand back
00:57:59You mean if you get the wand back?
00:58:01We will
00:58:03And when we do
00:58:04And when we do
00:58:05We'll do the divorce spell
00:58:06And when we do
00:58:07This mark will be gone
00:58:08I'll go home and
00:58:10Marry the best person who serves our family alliance
00:58:16It's not fair you know
00:58:18I know I'm the last person who should be saying that
00:58:21Because it's not like I can change it
00:58:23But it's not
00:58:26It's just the way it goes
00:58:27Right?
00:58:28There has to be a way for you to be with who you actually want
00:58:31And be a good heir
00:58:35Effie what I want has nothing to do with anything in my life
00:58:38That's fine
00:58:40It's what it means to be a Sherwood
00:58:43Just remember
00:58:44Repeating it doesn't make it true
00:58:48Alright
00:58:50Whatever you say sis
00:58:51You know best
00:58:54I know
00:58:55Give everyone a hug from me
00:58:57Tell them I'll be back home soon
00:59:08Last night was the last time
00:59:10After today we're done
00:59:13If I say that enough times
00:59:15Maybe I'll finally believe it
00:59:25I'll tell you about my plan with the wand
00:59:30My family's magic is dying
00:59:32My father's been catching in on broken promises for years
00:59:35But he holds most of the power
00:59:37And me and Sieg would just get the scraps
00:59:39That's how he controls us
00:59:42If I could use the wand just once
00:59:45I could take his power away from the bread
00:59:47I'm not trying to ruin your family
00:59:49I'm trying to save mine
00:59:50It's the only way that we can be free
00:59:54That's what you meant by
00:59:56Trying to save your family
00:59:58I was going to tell you the night before
01:00:00I was going to tell you the truth
01:00:01And then I was just going to ask if I could use the wand
01:00:04Just once
01:00:05And then I would do whatever you want
01:00:07Get a divorce
01:00:09Leave you alone
01:00:10Forever
01:00:12Why didn't you tell me?
01:00:16Why didn't you tell me that morning?
01:00:18Maybe things could have been different
01:00:21I would have asked you to stay
01:00:23It's a nice idea
01:00:26But our families have been at war since the beginning of time
01:00:30Maybe if we were different people
01:00:33We have different lives
01:00:35This would have worked
01:00:37Maybe we can work
01:00:40Maybe the wand has a spell for that, Eric
01:00:42A witch can hope
01:00:51What?
01:00:53Do I have mushrooms growing out of the side of my head?
01:00:55Why are you looking at me like that?
01:01:10Wait, I'm driving
01:01:11Pull over
01:01:30You have got to be kidding me
01:01:39End of the line, witches
01:01:44End of the line, witches
01:02:02End of the line, witches
01:02:04Eric
01:02:07No
01:02:13I can't
01:02:14No
01:02:14I can't
01:02:15Can't
01:02:15No
01:02:18No
01:02:28Now's not a good time, old man
01:02:30Well, it sounds like my insurance policy worked.
01:02:34You...
01:02:35You set the shadows, please?
01:02:37Of course I set her.
01:02:39Do you think I would trust you to finish the job?
01:02:53Demons are very expensive, you know?
01:02:56But I thought that the Sherwood girl's soul in exchange for the wand was a good enough bargain.
01:03:05Souls of magic users apparently taste better.
01:03:19You said you needed her alive.
01:03:21The Sherwoods will never pay off your debts if you kill their heir.
01:03:23I've reconsidered.
01:03:24Once I have that wand, I will be the most powerful witch alive.
01:03:30Debts won't matter.
01:03:31The stupid Sherwoods won't matter.
01:03:34And as for the girl, well...
01:03:35I don't need her breathing to use her power.
01:03:39I can always marry Sigrid off to form new alliances.
01:03:43Guess you won't be trapped in a marriage after all, son.
01:03:48You're welcome.
01:03:51Go to hell, old man.
01:03:53Go to hell, old man.
01:04:03Take it!
01:04:06No!
01:04:08Your soul will be delicious!
01:04:17I can take Dad's magic.
01:04:19End him.
01:04:20Finally be free.
01:04:26Get off my wife!
01:04:35You'll pay for that, witch!
01:04:37You'll pay for that, witch!
01:04:48This isn't the last you'll see of me.
01:04:55Hey, I've got you.
01:04:57You didn't run.
01:04:59You're kidding?
01:05:00I'd be a pretty shitty husband if I let my wife's soul get sucked out by a demon.
01:05:07Eric!
01:05:08You can't get rid of me that easily.
01:05:10No, no, no, no, no, no, no, stay with me.
01:05:12Eric!
01:05:13Oh, my...
01:05:15Eric, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, stay with me.
01:05:17Oh, my God.
01:05:20I can't save you.
01:05:21I don't have my powers.
01:05:23Why didn't you run?
01:05:26You could have saved yourself.
01:05:28I've been saving myself.
01:05:31My whole life.
01:05:33I thought I'd try something new.
01:05:35I'm an idiot, you stupid, stupid idiot.
01:05:40Yeah.
01:05:42But I'm your idiot.
01:05:50You took a divorce spell.
01:05:53I had a promise.
01:05:55Now you're free.
01:05:58I don't want to be free.
01:06:02I don't want to be free.
01:06:05I want to be with you.
01:06:07Just keep secrets safe.
01:06:09Safe from my father.
01:06:12Safe from all of it.
01:06:15You know, those days in Vegas...
01:06:20were the best three days of my life.
01:06:22All right, let's get this show started, okay?
01:06:24What do we want?
01:06:27I love you.
01:06:29I love you.
01:06:31I love you, too.
01:06:32I love you.
01:06:33I love you.
01:06:35I love you.
01:06:38No!
01:07:00The Wand of Light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires.
01:07:05I love you.
01:07:11Please, please, please.
01:07:20Please.
01:07:23Please.
01:07:25Please.
01:07:28Please.
01:07:37you absolute moron
01:07:42you absolute moron
01:07:44be gentle
01:07:45I was dead for like 10 seconds
01:07:49you're alive
01:07:51that is for divorcing me on your literal deathbed
01:07:54you asshole
01:07:55I thought I was doing something noble
01:07:57something cool
01:07:59the wand gave you your power back
01:08:02my mom used to say
01:08:04that the wand's user
01:08:06granted its deepest desire
01:08:07I guess it knew what I really wanted
01:08:11what did you want
01:08:13you
01:08:17don't scare me
01:08:18like that again okay
01:08:20you know
01:08:21I thought I heard something
01:08:25when I was
01:08:25bleeding out
01:08:29maybe you could
01:08:30say it again
01:08:35maybe you could
01:08:36say it again
01:08:39I love you
01:08:40you're expensive
01:08:43that's my girl
01:08:50let's go
01:09:03you ready for one last stop
01:09:05yeah
01:09:07yeah
01:09:25ah
01:09:27there you are
01:09:30I knew I could always trust a demon
01:09:32to get the job done
01:09:34now
01:09:35where is my wand
01:09:37wait
01:09:39you're supposed to be dead
01:09:41wow
01:09:41you weren't kidding
01:09:42he really is evil
01:09:44I put a barrier
01:09:46around this whole house
01:09:47it's impossible
01:09:48there's no way you should be able to be in here
01:09:50there's always a loophole
01:09:51hold man
01:09:55secret
01:09:56you ungrateful brat
01:09:58how dare you betray me like this
01:10:00really dad
01:10:01playing the family card
01:10:03after you almost sold me
01:10:04into child marriage
01:10:05you ungrateful little pests
01:10:14you're powerless now old man
01:10:16the magic's gone
01:10:17forever
01:10:31Eric
01:10:32Otis
01:10:33Svensson
01:10:34release me this instant
01:10:36that is an order
01:10:39you can handle it from here right
01:10:40his powers are gone
01:10:42it doesn't scare me anymore
01:10:45you ungrateful little brats
01:10:47both of you
01:10:48you'll pay for this
01:10:49you will both pay for this
01:10:55yeah yeah
01:10:55talk soon pups
01:10:57we're gonna hit the road
01:10:58I said get back here
01:10:59I said get back here
01:11:01get back here
01:11:03please don't do this
01:11:04you little
01:11:22so
01:11:23where to now
01:11:24should we
01:11:24go and
01:11:25drop off the wand of life
01:11:27yeah
01:11:29but there's something
01:11:30I want to do first
01:11:32that sounds ominous
01:11:35just so happens
01:11:36that there's another
01:11:37full moon tonight
01:11:39Leona Sherwood
01:11:41are you asking me
01:11:42to hand fast
01:11:43marry you
01:11:45yeah
01:11:47I think I am
01:11:48Eric Svensson
01:11:50well
01:11:50we better hurry
01:11:51if we're gonna take
01:11:52the wand of light home
01:11:53and make it back
01:11:54in time to the
01:11:55hunk-a-hunk-a
01:11:55wedding chapel of love
01:11:57I wonder if they have
01:11:58the same Elvis
01:11:58I sure hope so
01:12:00but
01:12:01if we're gonna get
01:12:02hand fast married again
01:12:03no more secrets this time
01:12:06so is there
01:12:07anything you want to
01:12:08come clean about now
01:12:09soon to be again
01:12:10husband
01:12:13there is
01:12:13one thing
01:12:16you might want to
01:12:17buckle up
01:12:18we're about to go
01:12:19super speed
01:12:21Bessie could have been
01:12:21going super speed
01:12:22this entire time
01:12:23you didn't tell me
01:12:25to make our trip
01:12:25last longer
01:12:26didn't you
01:12:27you know me so well
01:12:29soon to be again
01:12:30wife
01:12:33Leona Sherwood
01:12:34will you marry me
01:12:36and not because of
01:12:38some spell
01:12:38or because it's your
01:12:39duty
01:12:41but because you want
01:12:42to
01:12:46yes I will
01:12:56really
01:12:58hell yeah
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