- 15 hours ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:05Oh
00:00:25Jesus mom, can you at least warn me when you're gonna do that?
00:00:30Please. Oh, please. Don't be such a child. Do you still have the wand of light?
00:00:45See the all-powerful magic heirloom still safe and sound
00:00:49Well, you should be more careful. The wand of light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires
00:00:56Yeah, and if it falls into the wrong hands, it would become the most dangerous weapon in the world
00:01:02But a marriage to another noble witch family would only strengthen your power
00:01:08Yeah
00:01:09Unless it's an evil Svensson, right?
00:01:12The Svensons are our worst enemies Leona. Do you know how much our family has suffered over the centuries because
00:01:19of them?
00:01:20I know
00:01:22Sorry
00:01:23You are the guardian of the wand of light, Leona
00:01:27And you can't reach your full potential until you marry and succeed me as head of the family
00:01:33Come home with a husband next week or I will pick one for you
00:01:37What?
00:01:37Mom, no, please don't
00:01:39Leona Sherwood, you are getting married whether you like the boy I pick or not
00:01:45Mom, please
00:01:45Understand?
00:01:49Don't worry mom
00:01:51I'm the responsible daughter, remember
00:02:01Okay, Leona Sherwood, this is your last weekend of freedom
00:02:09For two more nights
00:02:11Fuck my responsibility
00:02:14I'm gonna have some fun
00:02:27Thank you
00:02:28That would be $25
00:02:32I think you mean it's on the house, right?
00:02:36Right
00:02:37It's on the house
00:02:56There you are, little Miss Sherwood
00:03:06Where the hell are you?
00:03:07I'm in Vegas like I said it would be old man
00:03:09Hey, don't you get smart with me you little shit
00:03:12Remember your mission
00:03:14Seduce the Sherwood heir and marry her
00:03:17And then that whole obnoxious family will be there to pay off our debts
00:03:20You mean your debts?
00:03:21Quiet
00:03:22It's bad enough that I have a sorry excuse for an heir
00:03:26You are an embarrassment to the Spence in name
00:03:29Now if you don't marry the Sherwood girl like I told you
00:03:32I am going to sell your little sister off to old Fitzgerald to be his fourth wife
00:03:38Dad's secret is just a kid
00:03:40When I want your opinion, I will ask for it until then
00:03:45You shut up and do as I say
00:03:47Do you understand?
00:03:49Yeah
00:03:50I understand
00:03:51Good
00:03:52And you
00:03:53Keep practicing
00:03:54You sound god awful
00:03:57Heartless fucking bastard
00:04:13It's two of us
00:04:15You're saying you don't remember me?
00:04:17Who remembers Shittman and his dumb teens anyways?
00:04:20No way
00:04:21Totally
00:04:22I love that show
00:04:23I watched it in one sitting at like 2am
00:04:26This is one of my favorites
00:04:27It definitely doesn't get the love that it deserves
00:04:29But I think it's one of the best ones
00:04:31Really?
00:04:33I never begged you for a sappy romance kind of guy
00:04:38Looks can be deceiving
00:04:44The wand of light
00:04:46So it does exist
00:04:48Maybe I'm just jaded
00:04:50It's hard to believe that love like that actually exists in real life
00:04:53Why not?
00:04:54We're witches
00:04:55Monsters and magic exist in our world
00:04:57Why can't true love?
00:05:00I'm Lele, by the way
00:05:03Lele Collins
00:05:07Eric Phillips
00:05:09Nice to meet you
00:05:10Lele Collins
00:05:12Damn
00:05:12He's hot
00:05:13And I'm in Vegas
00:05:14I deserve a little fun
00:05:16Wow
00:05:17Eric Phillips
00:05:19I'll be in the poker room tonight
00:05:21Maybe I'll see you there
00:05:23Maybe
00:05:42Okay, Svenson
00:05:44Don't fuck this up
00:05:58Eric motherfucking Svenson
00:06:01Excuse me?
00:06:02You ghosted me for 3 months after sleeping with me
00:06:04And you think you can sit there and act like nothing happened?
00:06:07I think you've got me confused with someone else
00:06:09Don't gaslight me, Svenson
00:06:11I know exactly who you are
00:06:27You know who she is?
00:06:29I think she's got me confused with someone else
00:06:35Thank you
00:06:43You nervous?
00:06:44Not at all
00:06:47You can always fold, you know
00:06:49I'd hate to send you home empty-handed
00:06:53Not a chance
00:06:55I'm here to win
00:06:57You sure?
00:06:58Seems like your focus is somewhere else
00:07:01Oh
00:07:03I am...
00:07:04Very focused
00:07:07Are you guys done making Google eyes at each other or what?
00:07:12You're full of shit, Phillips
00:07:13I call
00:07:15Yeah, there is no way that you have this
00:07:18But don't worry
00:07:20I'll let you go another round
00:07:22Once I beat you
00:07:23Actually, I think I'm about to hit the jackpot
00:07:29Eric?
00:07:49I have wanted to do that since I saw you by the pool in your bikini
00:07:53Eric, everyone can see
00:07:56Do you want me to stop?
00:08:13Let's see
00:08:13Let him watch
00:08:16Give him a shower
00:08:28Wait, please don't stop
00:08:30Use your words
00:08:33Tell me what you want
00:08:34I want your tongue inside me
00:08:37Please
00:08:37That's a good girl
00:08:45Eric
00:08:49Wait, wait, I think I'm gonna
00:08:53Was that some kind of vision?
00:08:58No, that was from him
00:09:08Lucky son of a bitch
00:09:10Beginner Lux, let's see you do it again next hand
00:09:14No can do
00:09:16I have a date with a
00:09:18Very pretty lady
00:09:24Why do I have the feeling that you're not exactly as you present
00:09:28Eric
00:09:29Phillips
00:09:30It is Vegas
00:09:33Isn't that part of the fun?
00:09:46You know, it wasn't very nice of you to tease me with your strap of your dress during our game
00:09:54It's very distracting
00:09:57Well, you know, it wasn't very nice of you to send me that little vision during our game
00:10:02I just wanted to give you a little sneak preview
00:10:14Eric, there are people
00:10:15And if you're quiet
00:10:17And if you're quiet, they won't see you
00:10:21I should stop
00:10:22This wasn't how the plan was supposed to go
00:10:24You know, you were right before
00:10:26I'm not who I say I am
00:10:28And who out there is exactly as they present
00:10:32But I am
00:10:33Look, I don't care who you are outside of this
00:10:36For once in my life
00:10:38I just want to forget about everything
00:10:42Just live in the moment
00:10:44And I think you
00:10:47Can help me do that
00:10:55Remove the camouflage
00:10:57I want you to see you
00:10:59The real you
00:11:02But then you'll know who I am
00:11:04I already know who you are
00:11:07The real you
00:11:09Wants to let go
00:11:15No one's ever looked at me like that
00:11:17He really wants me
00:11:19The real me
00:11:21Fuck
00:11:23You are gorgeous
00:11:27I want you, Eric
00:11:30I need you
00:11:35Spread your legs for me
00:11:41Keep your eyes open
00:11:44I want you to watch yourself come
00:11:47All over my fingers
00:11:53Keep your eyes open
00:12:00I thought you said that they couldn't hear me
00:12:02They can't if you stay quiet
00:12:04Keep your eyes open
00:12:05Or I'll stop
00:12:11That's a good girl
00:12:13Look down at my head
00:12:18Oh my god, they hurt me
00:12:21I can't
00:12:22Just relax
00:12:23I can't, Eric
00:12:27It's okay
00:12:28Don't think
00:12:30Just fail
00:12:32Tell me anything
00:12:35So good
00:12:36So good
00:12:36But I need
00:12:37More
00:12:38Eric
00:12:42You feel so good
00:12:44I can't wait to put my mouth on you
00:12:48So I'm going to make you come
00:12:51I'll beat you there
00:12:53I'm going to go down
00:12:54I want you to scream my name
00:12:57Let it come
00:12:57Five
00:12:59Four
00:13:01Three
00:13:03Two
00:13:07Four
00:13:28I can't believe I just came on his hand
00:13:31In front of other people
00:13:33I think this is your floor
00:13:41I'll be at the fountain tomorrow
00:13:43At eight o'clock
00:13:45If you decide that you want more
00:13:47See you there
00:13:58How does he know what floor I was on?
00:14:05So you've told me all about your wild system
00:14:08And the things that she's done
00:14:09Mm-hmm
00:14:11What about you?
00:14:13Me?
00:14:15I'm the responsible sister
00:14:17The boring one, if you will
00:14:20And I do what I'm supposed to do
00:14:22With all the rules and all that good stuff
00:14:25I don't believe you
00:14:26I mean, I know how you are at an elevator
00:14:29Oh, come on
00:14:32Come on
00:14:34It's Vegas
00:14:35Let me be your bad influence
00:14:37Just for the line
00:14:40So
00:14:42Any bad ideas?
00:14:47Just one
00:14:54What are you doing?
00:15:12No games
00:15:12Just fuck me already
00:15:14I thought I would try to woo you first
00:15:16Consider me rude
00:15:17Then we could take it slow?
00:15:19Your lips say one thing
00:15:20But your body says something else
00:15:34Wait
00:15:37Shit
00:15:39I almost lost my cool
00:15:40I gotta remember the plan
00:15:44Oh my god
00:15:45I can't believe I just did that
00:15:47That was so embarrassing
00:15:48This is why I don't do crazy shit
00:15:50That was way too much
00:15:51Hey
00:15:52You're never too much
00:15:53You don't understand, Eric
00:15:55Okay, if my family saw me do any of that
00:15:57They would freak out
00:15:59Tonight's not about your family
00:16:01Tonight's about you
00:16:02Remember?
00:16:03Forget what everyone else has told you to do
00:16:05Do something that you want to do
00:16:08Something no one would expect
00:16:10Maybe he's right
00:16:12I've spent my whole life doing what my family's told me to do
00:16:18For once in my life
00:16:20I'm doing something for myself
00:16:22She spotted the chapel
00:16:25Just like I planned
00:16:29So are you, uh
00:16:30You sure about this marriage thing?
00:16:32It's only temporary
00:16:33Okay, and old magic is weak
00:16:35The hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning
00:16:39So
00:16:40Are you ready for a holy matrimony?
00:16:42I'm ready if you're ready
00:16:45Come on
00:16:49Let's go
00:16:55You nervous?
00:16:57Just
00:16:59Never been married before
00:17:07Uh, it's my sister
00:17:08I need to take this
00:17:09Oh, yeah
00:17:10Take your time
00:17:11Elvis here wants me to pick out a hand fast bouquet
00:17:13Hey mama
00:17:14Let's get some flowers for you
00:17:15Come on
00:17:15Let's do it
00:17:17You need to come home
00:17:18Now
00:17:19I can't
00:17:20Secret
00:17:20Eric, dad's up to something
00:17:22He invited Fitzgerald to the house
00:17:24And made me dress up
00:17:25He looks at me weird
00:17:27It really freaks me out
00:17:28You were my big brother, E
00:17:30I need you
00:17:31Here
00:17:31Listen, I can't leave right now
00:17:33But I promise
00:17:34When I come home
00:17:35I'll have enough power
00:17:36To get rid of dad forever
00:17:37Okay?
00:17:41Hey
00:17:43Is everything okay?
00:17:45Yeah
00:17:48Yeah, it's fine
00:17:51You, uh
00:17:51You sure about this?
00:17:54It's only temporary
00:17:56Come on
00:17:57We'll be laughing about this for years
00:18:02Let's go
00:18:17Right
00:18:18Only temporary
00:18:20Unless you get hand fasted under a full moon
00:18:22Then the hand fast bond is nearly unbreakable
00:18:26But she doesn't know that
00:18:27And once she does
00:18:29She'll hate me
00:18:31Is your sister okay?
00:18:33Is something wrong?
00:18:36Nothing's wrong
00:18:37We're about to get buried in Vegas by Ovis
00:18:40What could possibly be wrong?
00:18:43Alright, you ready to rock and roll
00:18:44You hunk-a-hunk-a-hot couple?
00:18:47Let's get this show started
00:18:49Woo!
00:19:16This is it
00:19:18I have the Wand of Light
00:19:20The most powerful object in the world
00:19:22If I leave now
00:19:24I could use it to take control away from my father
00:19:27Set secret and eye free
00:19:35But I already betrayed her once
00:20:04I have the latest
00:20:19I'll have to get more chocolate strawberries.
00:20:21Be back soon.
00:20:32It's only temporary.
00:20:33Okay, and old magic is weak.
00:20:35The hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning.
00:20:38Hmm, that's weird.
00:20:41The mark should have worn off by now.
00:20:51So, did you marry the girl yet?
00:20:57No, it's...
00:20:59Complicated.
00:21:00Complicated?
00:21:01Or distracted?
00:21:03You were sent there to marry the Sherwood heir and bind her power to this family, not to play house.
00:21:10You're a Svensson.
00:21:11Act like one.
00:21:12Eric is a Svensson?
00:21:15I married my family's worst enemy?
00:21:18I don't need you to tell me what I am.
00:21:21Then stop hesitating.
00:21:23If the rumors about the wand of light are true, we might catch an even bigger prize.
00:21:28So hurry up and marry the Sherwood girl and then bring her to me, idiot.
00:21:41He's been lying this whole time.
00:21:49I need to tell her the truth.
00:21:53You lying piece of cruel shit!
00:21:56You didn't want me.
00:21:57You just wanted the fucking wand, didn't you?
00:22:01I didn't even know the wand existed until I met you.
00:22:03You still lied to me, Eric.
00:22:05You knew I was a Sherwood from the start.
00:22:07That's why you gave me a fake fucking name, right?
00:22:09Okay, I did, but that was before we...
00:22:11You lied before, before you decided to mess with me?
00:22:13Get your dick wet before you ruin me and my family forever?
00:22:17I'm not trying to ruin your family.
00:22:18I'm trying to save mine.
00:22:19I know all about you, Svensons.
00:22:22All you do is lie and cheat and steal to get whatever you fucking want.
00:22:27I should have caught it at the poker table, but your little tricks won't work on me this time.
00:22:32The hand fast, Mark, it'll fade.
00:22:35Just like you, just like whatever this was.
00:22:38The hand fast wasn't a trick.
00:22:39Not that part.
00:22:41Not with you.
00:22:42It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:22:45You will never, ever get the wand.
00:22:49Lily, what?
00:22:51When this fades, Eric, I will never have to see you again.
00:23:08So, that didn't happen.
00:23:12My older sister Effie told me that the mark would fade a week later.
00:23:17Then a month went by, then, well...
00:23:25See, this is why you don't fuck with old magic.
00:23:27It's all fun and games, so there's a full moon.
00:23:30Then it's the most powerful magic in the universe.
00:23:37Apparently, getting a hand fast married under a full moon creates a bond that's almost unbreakable.
00:23:44Also, apparently, the almost part means that both people have to perform the divorce spell.
00:23:51I tried calling, texting, sending flying monkeys, nothing, not a single word from my beloved husband for half a year.
00:24:12Yes, I still sleep with a wand under my pillow.
00:24:16The emotional ass whooping I got from my mother for getting hand fasted to a stranger was bad enough.
00:24:21No one can ever find out that I almost lost the wand, too.
00:24:26I just need one night to sleep without thinking about him.
00:24:54Who are you?
00:24:55What do you want with the wand of light?
00:24:58Nothing. I'm just here to collect my payday from my client once I bring him that wand.
00:25:04Payday? Someone sent you! Who?
00:25:08I'm afraid I can't break client confidentiality. Sorry, sweetie.
00:25:12Well, I'm afraid that you chose the wrong witch to fuck with tonight.
00:25:20No!
00:25:25No!
00:25:26No!
00:25:26No!
00:25:27No!
00:25:27No!
00:25:29Be wise not to fight back, witch. You're in over your head.
00:25:34I'd rather die than let you take the wand!
00:25:39Suit yourself.
00:25:44Suit yourself.
00:25:53What the f**k?
00:26:08Get off me! She had the wand!
00:26:11I got the wand. I'll get the rest later.
00:26:16No!
00:26:20You are the reason I lost the wand. Who are you?
00:26:29The hand fast mark.
00:26:34Hello wife. Miss me?
00:26:39What are you doing here?
00:26:41You know I thought I'd spice up our marriage, do a little role playing, but it looks like you were
00:26:46more into bondage. I didn't know you were so kinky.
00:26:48Shut up!
00:26:53You should be thanking me. I did just save your house.
00:26:55Thank you. You're the reason my family's most powerful heirloom is gone. How did you even find me?
00:27:02Wait a minute.
00:27:04You were trying to steal the wand too, weren't you?
00:27:07Maybe.
00:27:09God, you slimy, tote-faced motherfucker!
00:27:13Okay, first you tricked me into marrying you, then you ghost me for six months, and now you come in
00:27:18here like a goddamn fucking cartoon burglar and try to take my wand!
00:27:23Look, I was just gonna borrow it!
00:27:25Yeah, for one of your dirty, no-good-spensing schemes?
00:27:29I just... I need it. Okay? It's... it's the only way that we can be free.
00:27:35Look, my dad doesn't know about our marriage. Not yet. But he knows about the wand. If he gets a
00:27:41hold of it, he's gonna sell it to the highest bidder.
00:27:43Whoever controls the wand has the power to take over the world. Or worse.
00:27:47No! Worse than tricking me into marrying you?
00:27:50I told you that that wasn't a trick.
00:27:52It doesn't matter, Eric. She has the wand! That shadow thief or whatever! And that's your fault!
00:27:59I can get it back!
00:28:02Look, I know I don't deserve it, but just give me one more chance.
00:28:06I can get the wand back, take care of what I need to take care of, and then I'll do
00:28:10the divorce spell.
00:28:11Please, Lily, just give me one more chance. Please.
00:28:15I can't trust him. I shouldn't.
00:28:19But my gut tells me, this time, it might be different.
00:28:29No. No, we're both gonna go get it.
00:28:34It is my job as a Sherwood heir to set things right, so I don't let the wand fall into
00:28:40the wrong hands.
00:28:41And you really think after Vegas, I would let you go alone to find the most powerful magical object in
00:28:46the entire world?
00:28:48Fair. Uh, fair. Uh, whatever you want, Lily.
00:28:52God, I hate when you call me that.
00:28:54Alright, I'll call you wife. And you can call me whatever you want.
00:29:00Eric, husband, daddy...
00:29:02Shut up! Don't call me wife either. After we get this wand, we will do the divorce spell. Got it?
00:29:08You're breaking my heart. I mean, you're the better half of my soul.
00:29:12Yeah, you're not gonna speak talk your way into my pants again, Eric.
00:29:16We'll see.
00:29:22Now, the wand forbids a direct tracking spell, so we have to track its trail.
00:29:27That's a ten-mile radius. We'll never find the wand inside that circle.
00:29:31Well, with the tracking spell, I get a location, okay?
00:29:34It doesn't last long, though.
00:29:36We'll have like three or four days.
00:29:37Well, lucky for you, I already packed your bags.
00:29:42Consider it our official honeymoon.
00:29:48Aja, this, we're done. You got it?
00:29:50Don't go back on your words, Vincent. We will do the divorce spell.
00:29:54Cross my heart. Hope to die.
00:30:14You imagined a car here?
00:30:17This isn't just any car.
00:30:25This is Bessie.
00:30:27You really expect us to track down the most powerful, magical object in the world?
00:30:32In a car without a roof?
00:30:34I mean, if you're not comfortable,
00:30:40I could go by myself.
00:30:42If you trust me not to run away.
00:30:44Hmm.
00:30:46I wouldn't trust you with a half-eaten newt muffin.
00:30:49I was gonna throw in the trash.
00:30:53Then your chariot awaits.
00:30:55Wife.
00:31:15We've been driving all day, and she hasn't said a single word.
00:31:24We've been driving all day, and she hasn't said a single word.
00:31:30You're Svensson.
00:31:32You don't play house with sheriffs.
00:31:33Wait, why are we turning?
00:31:35We don't have any time.
00:31:36We have to find the wand, Eric.
00:31:39That circle is getting further and further away.
00:31:41Plus, it's getting dark.
00:31:43We need to stay somewhere for the night.
00:31:44Why don't you just let me drive?
00:31:45Because you haven't slept either.
00:31:47Plus, no one can drive Bessie but me.
00:31:51What is with guys and cars?
00:31:53Jesus.
00:31:53No.
00:31:54I mean, literally, no one else can drive Bessie.
00:31:57My great-great-grandfather put a hex on all of our possessions.
00:32:00Anyone that's non-blood related can't touch it.
00:32:03The Svensons like to hoard their treasures.
00:32:06Your family has issues.
00:32:08Finally.
00:32:09Something we can agree on.
00:32:11Was this your plan all along?
00:32:13Make me feel bad for you because your family's evil,
00:32:15so I get all ooey gooey and forget about the divorce?
00:32:18Not everyone in my family is evil.
00:32:21Yeah.
00:32:22OK.
00:32:35You cross this wall or do anything to piss me off more
00:32:38than you already have, then you do not even want to imagine
00:32:41the hex I'm going to put on you.
00:32:48I promise, no funny business.
00:32:52Pinky promise.
00:33:13Good night to you two.
00:33:28In Vegas, you said you had a sister, right?
00:33:34Yeah, Sigrid.
00:33:38She didn't ask to be a Sphinxen.
00:33:41She's different than us.
00:33:42Better.
00:33:44Not like you?
00:33:46No.
00:33:48Not like me.
00:33:50But you already know that.
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00:36:05No.
00:36:05No.
00:36:05No.
00:36:06No.
00:36:06No.
00:36:07No.
00:36:09No.
00:36:09No.
00:36:12No.
00:36:18No.
00:36:24No.
00:36:25Sit, Lily. Be a good girl, and go for me.
00:36:37Are you ready?
00:36:41Okay, Eric.
00:36:57You said that you wouldn't look.
00:37:01I don't need to look to know what you were doing while thinking about me.
00:37:07God, you are so full of yourself.
00:37:09Do I know what I heard?
00:37:11Say another word, and I'll turn you into a frog.
00:37:16Were you thinking about that time in Vegas where I ate you out in the shower?
00:37:23You came so hard, you almost crushed my skull between your thighs.
00:37:29I think about those times a lot.
00:37:32Yeah, well, I don't think about them at all.
00:37:59You still haven't even told me what you won't belong for yet.
00:38:02It's on a need-to-know basis.
00:38:05Oh, don't you think I need to know?
00:38:08I am your wife, after all.
00:38:10Oh, now you remember you're my wife.
00:38:13Funny how you only remember that when it's convenient for you.
00:38:15I remember every time I think about how badly I fucked up in Vegas.
00:38:19So all I am is a mistake.
00:38:20If I remember right, you're the one that suggested that we get hand-fast married.
00:38:24Obviously, that was before I knew about all your bullshit and lies.
00:38:29Duty and responsibility might not be a big deal in your family, but in mine, it's huge.
00:38:34See? There you go again. Always worried about what your family wants.
00:38:38It's never about what you want.
00:38:39I follow the rules because I have to, Eric.
00:38:42If I don't, I end up in situations like this.
00:38:45Did you ever stop to think that maybe that's unfair?
00:38:48That maybe your ideas and their ideas are bullshit?
00:38:52You ever think of that?
00:38:54Spoken like a true Spinson.
00:38:56Well, you're a Spinson too, sweetheart.
00:38:58Not much longer, I can tell you that.
00:39:19I'm gonna get some coffee.
00:39:21It's getting dark. You really think you should be alone?
00:39:23So now that we're married, you think you have to babysit me too?
00:39:30fine just don't take too long
00:39:35you got her in the car or what who don't play done with me boy the little sherwood witch you
00:39:42married forgot to tell me about you thought i wouldn't find out huh you did a good job of
00:39:49hiding it i'll give you that maybe you are my son after all huh what's the end game here you
00:39:56said
00:39:56you just needed to get the sherwood's wand so you could pay off your debts what does she have to
00:39:59do
00:40:00with it because i'm not an idiot like you i'll finally have all the leverage i need over the
00:40:06sherwood family when i tell them their pretty little heir is my new daughter-in-law and then
00:40:12it'll be our family that gets to call the shots in the magic world so you just want to use
00:40:17her
00:40:18like you use mom like you're using your own daughter this is not a request boy bring the
00:40:24girl and the wand to me or you will be stripped of your name your magic everything and your sister
00:40:30she'll be the one paying the price for your mistakes
00:40:44this isn't right the trail should still be here
00:40:48would you like some coffee ms sherwood yeah thank you wait how did you know my
00:40:54you
00:40:58but the map said that that's cute you think that dusty old map could track me
00:41:09that one line
00:41:13not anymore it's not and sadly my employers need your powers too
00:41:18employer
00:41:21hold still this will only hurt a bit
00:41:33get away from her
00:41:40eric the wand
00:41:53my magic
00:41:55she took half of my magic eric
00:41:57you're okay i got you
00:42:00you're okay
00:42:03i don't understand the map said that the wand was miles away
00:42:07what did she want with my powers
00:42:09thief must have found some way to bypass the tracking spell
00:42:13she can't have gone far we'll find her
00:42:14lay low for now
00:42:16he airs down the car i can't breathe
00:42:19okay
00:42:29hey hey hey look at me look at me you're okay you're okay just breathe i got you you're safe
00:42:37i thought she was gonna kill me eric
00:42:40i'm not gonna let that happen
00:42:43not while i'm breathing
00:42:57i still hate you
00:43:01if you hated me
00:43:03you wouldn't let me touch you like this
00:43:05this doesn't change anything
00:43:08it's only scratching an itch
00:43:10once we get the wand
00:43:12and we do the divorce spell
00:43:14now we forget each other existed
00:43:21is that what you want lily
00:43:23you want to forget how good i make you feel
00:43:26you want to forget
00:43:27i'm the only person in the whole fucking world
00:43:30who can make you feel this way
00:43:47we can't do this
00:43:50this is what goes wrong between us
00:43:52we can't make that mistake again
00:43:54we have a job to do eric
00:43:56let's get the wand
00:43:57that's it
00:43:59and then what
00:44:01you know what happens after eric
00:44:03we do the divorce spell
00:44:05and we never see each other again
00:44:07he has to worry about her
00:44:39Smells like fresh baked pastries, cinnamon, old magic.
00:44:48I should have known.
00:44:50It's a Satyr's Inn.
00:44:53That smell.
00:44:55Noman-inhabitus smell.
00:44:57It's woven into places like this for couples.
00:45:02You mean orgies?
00:45:05Satyrs are the horniest bastards in the known world.
00:45:08It lowers any fear, doubt, shame.
00:45:13Grants of your deepest desires.
00:45:16Without any fear of judgment or consequences.
00:45:28You don't.
00:45:31I'm trying not to.
00:45:50The spell doesn't create desire.
00:45:54It lets go of the lies.
00:45:57It tells us what we really want.
00:45:59What I want doesn't matter.
00:46:02It matters in here.
00:46:03I don't.
00:46:05Tell me what you really want.
00:46:07You can say goodbye.
00:46:09And go our separate ways.
00:46:11Or you can tell me you want this.
00:46:14You want me.
00:46:18Tell me to stay.
00:46:22Stay.
00:46:24Please.
00:46:24God, what is this?
00:46:27Is this just the magic word?
00:46:30No.
00:46:32It's not the spell.
00:46:34It's freedom.
00:46:37Anything in the outside world doesn't matter.
00:46:40Just you.
00:46:41And me.
00:46:44I shouldn't want this.
00:46:46I know.
00:46:49I shouldn't be doing this.
00:46:53Or this.
00:46:55Be able to share with it to the most respected family of the whole rich world.
00:47:00You definitely shouldn't sound this fucking sexy.
00:47:05To mind.
00:47:07You're with the ear.
00:47:09To the Sherwood family.
00:47:12Who are you?
00:47:14I want you, Eric.
00:47:16I need you.
00:47:20Tell me who you are.
00:47:23Lily.
00:47:25Close.
00:47:29But not close.
00:47:32Tonight.
00:47:33Tell me who you are.
00:47:36Your wife.
00:47:49Oh.
00:48:01This doesn't change anything.
00:48:03I know.
00:48:05We can have tonight and then tomorrow we go back to who we are on the outside.
00:48:10Sure.
00:48:11I'll go back to being my bad self and you can go back to pretending to be a good little
00:48:15witch.
00:48:16Excuse me.
00:48:18Don't deny.
00:48:19Lily share what's been said.
00:48:21I know I'm kind of dork.
00:48:23Naughty thoughts you have.
00:48:26I don't.
00:48:28It's okay to be bad.
00:48:31You don't have to pretend.
00:48:34I don't, huh?
00:48:39You know just because I have half my magic doesn't mean I can't play with you for tonight.
00:48:46I know I can't play with you.
00:48:49I can't play with you, I can't play with you.
00:48:54Oh.
00:48:55Well, I can't play with you.
00:48:56No you're gonna sit there.
00:48:58Like a good little witch.
00:49:06and i'm gonna do whatever i want to you
00:49:18i don't remember packing that lingerie close your eyes
00:49:25eric you're so good for being such a bad boy
00:49:32i'm being properly motivated not to move
00:49:38see how long it takes you to break
00:49:41for you i could stay here forever
00:49:43pretty to think so why don't we test that little theory
00:49:48we're playing a dangerous game
00:49:51all you have to do is admit that i win
00:49:57i'll let you fuck me i'll even let you come wherever
00:50:03you want you can come here
00:50:10or here
00:50:13i'll even let you come in here
00:50:18god come on i know you wanna just admit
00:50:24i'm right
00:50:28fine you win
00:50:30oh what was fast
00:50:32you hurt me
00:50:43so what's my prize
00:50:44i could torture you like you did me
00:50:53but i want to be inside you
00:50:55i want to feel you squeeze me tight
00:50:59then take me to bed husband
00:51:04call me that again
00:51:07you want me to fuck you husband
00:51:10yeah
00:51:11fuck me
00:51:20tell me a story
00:51:24like the ones you did in vegas
00:51:27i've got a story about
00:51:29my pet goat gilmore
00:51:31and how he got stuck on a magic carpet
00:51:34or the story about how my sister tried to negotiate with a troll
00:51:39using only red images
00:51:40i already know about your family
00:51:47i want to know about you
00:51:50what's it like to be a svensson heir
00:51:52you want the insider info
00:51:56you tell me yours i'll tell you mine
00:51:58you gonna tell me how wonderful it was
00:52:01growing up as a beloved and blessed sherwood
00:52:07is that what you think being a sherwood is like
00:52:11is that what you think being a sherwood is like
00:52:13all fun and rainbows
00:52:16yeah everybody loves your family
00:52:17that's not true eric
00:52:19there are so many people who would love it if we just disappeared
00:52:23my mother has been shouldering all that responsibility and pressure for decades
00:52:28and next year i will be the head witch in charge
00:52:32everyone's counting on me to do the right thing
00:52:34like eat your fruits and veggies
00:52:35like spending my whole childhood being told that the whole world depended on me
00:52:41like never bothering to have any hopes or dreams because my whole life was planned for me
00:52:47from the very start before i was even born
00:52:50i'm always doing the right thing for the family
00:52:52i was never allowed to even think of doing the wrong thing
00:52:56i couldn't be tired i couldn't be scared i couldn't be angry
00:53:00one mistake and my family loses everything that they've ever worked for
00:53:04if this whole world fades to black it's because i messed up
00:53:08it's because i didn't do a good job
00:53:13i don't think i've ever said that out loud before
00:53:16i'm glad you did
00:53:19your turn
00:53:21growing up
00:53:22growing up
00:53:22Svinson was
00:53:24a little different
00:53:26the old man likes to say i was
00:53:29the first of his disappointments
00:53:31i guess it's good
00:53:33at least i was first in something
00:53:36i didn't care about disappointing him
00:53:38i just wanted to get away from him
00:53:41i had it all planned out when
00:53:43i turned 16 i'd leave change my name and the Svinson bloodline would die with me
00:53:48my mom died when secret was born
00:53:53my dad used her against me
00:53:56every day since
00:54:03i'm so sorry eric
00:54:06you shouldn't have asked
00:54:09it's okay
00:54:11Svinsons have always lived in the sherwood shadows
00:54:14we are the shadows
00:54:18all you do is shine
00:54:30you always ask me what i want
00:54:34what do you want eric
00:54:39you'd hate me if i told you
00:54:41i mean more than you already do
00:54:46i don't hate you
00:54:49i never did
00:55:11i don't hate you
00:55:13i don't hate you
00:55:19you're probably not
00:55:24Eric. Something's wrong. Dad's got visitors. A bunch of old guys. I don't know who they
00:55:30are. He made me play piano for them like some kind of dress up doll. It's really freaking
00:55:36me out. Eric. Are you safe? Eric. Are you safe?
00:55:50For now, all those weird old men lived last night. And I hexed my door so no one could
00:55:57get in. Don't let anyone in. If Dad tries to get you to play with any of those weird old
00:56:01men, just... I know. I'll just do what he says. I always do. I'm so sick of this E. What
00:56:10if
00:56:10he actually does make me marry one of those guys? I'm never going to let that happen, alright?
00:56:16Look, I'm close to getting the wand of life. The wand of late?
00:56:21Like the one from the fairy tales? You can't tell Dad secret. When I get the wand, be ready
00:56:29for my call. I have a plan. I barely know basic spells. I don't know if... You can. I know
00:56:37you can. When the time is right, you'll be ready.
00:56:47Call and in.
00:57:07Filling up Bessie. Meet me downstairs when you're ready.
00:57:20Oh my god! Why do you and mom always do that? A bit high-strung, aren't you, sis?
00:57:28I was just in the middle of thinking. Yeah, and going by your aura, I can guess about who.
00:57:32Very much giving post-orgasmic afterglow. Aww, yeah. Well, you and your little aura reading
00:57:38can go jump in a lake. Oh, aren't we feisty this morning. Your super hot hubby isn't around,
00:57:44I'm guessing? Or have you already murdered him after catching his dick? I know all the best places to
00:57:49hide a body, by the way. I'm fine, Effie. I know all about Eric Spenson. I'm not stupid.
00:57:57And when we get the wand back... You mean if you get the wand back? We will. And when we
00:58:04do,
00:58:04we'll do the divorce spell. This mark will be gone. I'll go home and marry the best person who
00:58:11serves our family alliance. It's not fair, you know. I know I'm the last person who should be
00:58:20saying that because it's not like I can change it. But it's not. It's just the way it goes, right?
00:58:28There has to be a way for you to be with who you actually want and be a good heir.
00:58:35Effie, what I want has nothing to do with anything in my life. That's fine. It's what it means to
00:58:41be a
00:58:41girl. I'm not sure what. Just remember, repeating it doesn't make it true. All right. Whatever you say,
00:58:50sis, you know best. I know. Give everyone a hug from me. Tell them I'll be back home soon.
00:59:08Last night was the last time. After today, we're done. If I say that enough times,
00:59:15maybe I'll finally believe it.
00:59:25I'll tell you about my plan with the wand.
00:59:30My family's magic is dying. My father's been cashing in on broken promises for years,
00:59:35but he holds most of the power and me and Sieg, we just get the scraps. That's how he controls
00:59:40us.
00:59:42If I could use the wand just once, I can take his power away from the bread.
00:59:47I'm not trying to ruin your family. I'm trying to save mine. It's the only way that we can be
00:59:52free.
00:59:54That's what you meant by trying to save your family.
00:59:58I was going to tell you the night before. I was going to tell you the truth.
01:00:01And then I was just going to ask if I could use the wand just once. And then I would
01:00:06do whatever you
01:00:07want to get a divorce, leave you alone forever. Why didn't you tell me?
01:00:16Why didn't you tell me that morning? Maybe things could have been different.
01:00:21I would have asked you to stay. It's a nice idea, but our families have been at war since the
01:00:28beginning
01:00:28of time. Maybe if we were different people, we have different lives, this would have worked.
01:00:37Maybe we can. Maybe the wand has a spell for that, Eric. A witch can hope.
01:00:53What? Do I have mushrooms growing out of the side of my head? Why are you looking at me like
01:00:57that?
01:01:09Why are you looking at me like that? Why are you looking at me like that?
01:01:10Wait, I'm driving.
01:01:11Pull over.
01:01:24Oh damn, oh damn.
01:01:31You have got to be kidding me.
01:01:39End of the line, witches!
01:01:59I have an indian.
01:02:03Eric!
01:02:09Eric!
01:02:11Eric!
01:02:14No!
01:02:16Eric!
01:02:16Ah, no!
01:02:18Ah, no!
01:02:20Ah!
01:02:21Ah, no!
01:02:23Ah!
01:02:23Ah!
01:02:24Ah!
01:02:25Ah!
01:02:28now's not a good time old man well it sounds like my insurance policy worked
01:02:34you you set the shadow thief of course i set her do you think i would trust you to finish
01:02:41the job
01:02:52demons are very expensive you know but i thought that the sherwood girl's soul in exchange for the
01:03:02wand was a good enough bargain souls of magic users apparently taste better
01:03:19you said you needed her alive the sherwoods will never pay off your debts if you kill their heir
01:03:23i've reconsidered once i have that wand i will be the most powerful witch alive
01:03:29debts won't matter the stupid sherwoods won't matter and as for the girl well i don't need her
01:03:36breathing to use her power i can always marry sigrid off to form new alliances
01:03:43guess you won't be trapped in a marriage after all son you're welcome
01:03:51go to hell home man
01:04:03take it
01:04:08your soul will be delicious
01:04:16i can take dad's magic and him finally be free
01:04:26get off my wife
01:04:35you'll pay for that witch
01:04:48this isn't the last you'll see of me
01:04:55hey i've got you
01:04:57you didn't run
01:04:59you're kidding i'd be a pretty shitty husband if i let my wife's soul get sucked out by a demon
01:05:07eric
01:05:08you can't get rid of me that easily
01:05:10no no no no stay with me
01:05:13eric oh my god
01:05:15eric no no no no no stay with me
01:05:17oh my god
01:05:20i can't save you i don't have my powers
01:05:23why didn't you run
01:05:26you could have saved yourself
01:05:28i've been saving myself
01:05:30my whole life
01:05:32i thought i'd try something new
01:05:35you're an idiot you stupid stupid idiot
01:05:39yeah
01:05:42but i'm your idiot
01:05:50you took a divorce spell
01:05:52i had a promise
01:05:55now you're free
01:05:56i don't want to be free
01:06:02i don't want to be free
01:06:05i want to be with you
01:06:07just keep secrets safe
01:06:09safe from my father
01:06:11safe from all of it
01:06:15you know
01:06:16those days in vegas
01:06:20were the best three days of my life
01:06:22all right let's get this show started okay
01:06:27i love you
01:06:29i love you too
01:06:32i love you i love you
01:06:36eric
01:06:38no
01:07:00the wand of light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires
01:07:10please
01:07:11please
01:07:12please
01:07:21eric
01:07:22please
01:07:23Please.
01:07:33Lily.
01:07:35You absolute moron.
01:07:42You absolute moron.
01:07:44Be gentle.
01:07:46I was dead for like 10 seconds.
01:07:48You're alive.
01:07:51That is for divorcing me on your literal deathbed, you asshole.
01:07:56I thought I was doing something noble.
01:07:58Something cool.
01:07:59The wand gave you your power back?
01:08:02My mom used to say that the wands user granted its deepest desire.
01:08:07I guess it knew what I really wanted.
01:08:11What did you want?
01:08:13You.
01:08:17Don't scare me like that again, okay?
01:08:20You know, I thought I heard something, but I was bleeding out.
01:08:29Maybe you could say it again?
01:08:35Maybe you could say it again?
01:08:39I love you, Eric's Vincent.
01:08:43That's my girl.
01:08:50Let's go.
01:09:03You ready for one last stop?
01:09:07Yeah.
01:09:25Ah, there you are.
01:09:30I knew I could always trust a demon to get the job done.
01:09:34Now, where is my wand?
01:09:37Wait.
01:09:39You're supposed to be dead.
01:09:41Wow.
01:09:41You weren't kidding.
01:09:43He really is evil.
01:09:44I put a barrier around this whole house.
01:09:47It's impossible.
01:09:48There's no way you should be able to be in here.
01:09:50There's always a loophole, old man.
01:09:55Secret.
01:09:56You ungrateful brat.
01:09:58How dare you betray me like this?
01:10:00Really, Dad?
01:10:01Playing the family card after you almost sold me into child marriage?
01:10:05You ungrateful little pests.
01:10:14You're powerless now, old man.
01:10:16The magic's gone.
01:10:18Forever.
01:10:31Eric, Otis, Svensson, release me this instant.
01:10:36That is an order.
01:10:39You can handle it from here, right?
01:10:41His powers are gone.
01:10:42It doesn't scare me anymore.
01:10:46You ungrateful little brats.
01:10:48Both of you will pay for this.
01:10:49You will both pay for this.
01:10:55Yeah, yeah.
01:10:56Talk soon, pups.
01:10:57We're going to hit the road.
01:10:59I said get back here.
01:11:00I said get back here.
01:11:02Get back here.
01:11:03Please don't do this, you little bitch.
01:11:22So, where to now?
01:11:24Should we go and drop off the wand of life?
01:11:28Yeah.
01:11:29But there's something I want to do first.
01:11:32That sounds ominous.
01:11:34It just so happens that there's another full moon tonight.
01:11:39Leona Sherwood, are you asking me to hand fast marry you?
01:11:45Yeah.
01:11:47I think I am, Eric Svensson.
01:11:50Well, we better hurry if we're going to take the wand of light home and make it back in time
01:11:54to the hunk-a-hunk-a wedding chapel of love.
01:11:57I wonder if they have the same Elvis.
01:11:58I sure hope so.
01:12:00But if we're going to get hand fast married again, no more secrets this time.
01:12:06So, is there anything you want to come clean about now, soon-to-be-again husband?
01:12:12There is one thing.
01:12:16You might want to buckle up.
01:12:18We're about to go super speed.
01:12:21Bessie could have been going super speed this entire time.
01:12:24You didn't tell me to make our trip last longer, didn't you?
01:12:27You know me so well.
01:12:29Soon-to-be-again wife.
01:12:33Leona Sherwood, will you marry me?
01:12:36And not because of some spell or because it's your duty.
01:12:41But because you want to.
01:12:46Yes, I will.
01:12:57Ready?
01:12:58Hell yeah.
01:13:06Let's go.
01:13:07Let's go.
01:13:09Let's go.
01:13:10Let's go.
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