- 11 minutes ago
Coronation Street - Season 67 - Episode 32: Wednesday, 18th February 2026
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00:00I
00:33all right Webster and finally dogs I just wish they'd bring bat wings back in fashion again
00:42the quirky canine compadres are not our amigos Lily if you see one jump up behind a letterbox
00:51withdraw now I've printed off a few bullet points re health and safety for the paper round
01:00right how do I look well we not lose you in a pea super now you've got your papers yes
01:08once more
01:11unto the breach dear friends once more good luck Lily may the delivery gods be with thee thanks
01:18see you later what a lovely jerkin is Lily your new paper girl hey how on earth did you get
01:26I do
01:28have somewhat of a sixth sense when it comes to these things oh what's that bri bri oh it's a
01:35yeah oh very rare edition of the woman in white tights sorry I read a book once called the woman
01:44in white tights it's about a woman who wore white tights no it's the famous book by Wilkie Collins
01:54oh imagine calling your kid Wilkie Rita you may as well stick a sign on his head saying go on
01:59then
02:00bully me well you know the woman in white is a very famous book well if it's anything like the
02:06woman in
02:06white tights it will be a huge disappointment now Rita before Brian bores us to death with any further
02:13literary pretensions I wondered whether or not you cared to join me for a snifter or two later in the
02:18bistro Brian is my program on tonight no it's tomorrow oh well that's very nice thing I can't
02:26believe you've never heard of the woman in white Mary yeah and I can't believe you've never heard of
02:30the woman in white tights ciao Reed I'll film up a time later via text I must dash I need
02:36to bleach my
02:41splash backs that's all gone through so come on then how is she well if I'm missing her I don't
02:47know
02:47you must be feeling well um she seems okay she's holding up okay despite everything you know bless
02:54her you give her my love next time you talk to her yeah of course me and Kev are gonna
02:59go and see
02:59later hey bunny listen has um Debbie ever has she ever said anything to you about about what Carl
03:08Carl in what way well nothing out of the ordinary you know except that she's always been really fond
03:15of him oh hello speak of the devil are you taking my name in vain oh here he is the
03:22Walter Mitty of
03:24Weatherfield never heard of it mate I'm not your mate and I'll wipe that smirk off your face in a
03:29minute actually thinking about it is as you're married to my mom I might start calling you don't
03:36even think about it you know I'll get the truth from Debbie and when I do I'll have you bang
03:43to rights
03:51I can't believe that he's done me
03:55he was the one you know he's so lovely Debbie what did you say it was inside for again
04:04aggravated burglary with menaces but he didn't mean to chop that guy's fingers off his hand just slipped
04:12and he says you can get really good plastic hands these days he told me right well it sounds
04:20lovely man after me own heart are you being zaggy of course I am your daft duck what it sounds
04:30absolutely atrocious part and do you know what you are better off without him
04:37blimey what's going on here then
04:39hmm I'm just consoling mouth almighty of you
04:43eh
04:44well you're a bit aren't you you know gob on a stick
04:47you are what cheeky bitch do you know what I am sick at sander you know I'm sight of you
04:55and as
04:55for smell you need to invest in a bit of roll on deodorant you you stink
04:59oh wait leave her alone you look there's no point battering her in getting a longer sentence
05:04she insulted me I insulted your ex are you dick or something
05:09paula go somewhere else and chill your boots it's not work along a stretch trust me
05:22oh I'm sorry
05:26my words seem to be coming out before my mind kicks in
05:30but thank you
05:32look you've got to be careful around women like that
05:35they're not your mates
05:37I don't know whether it's because
05:40I'm in here and
05:41my routine's gone all skew with but
05:44I do think I'm getting a lot worse
05:48right
05:52I'm not gonna last five minutes am I
05:54if I
05:56if I keep letting me mouth run away with itself
06:02there we go
06:03I think I've got a coleslaw coming
06:05no you didn't order coleslaw love
06:08it means coleslaw
06:09whatever you do don't touch it
06:10you think you've got problems
06:12I've still not figured out how I'm gonna get my Duke of Edinburgh badge
06:14oh it's easy is that
06:16how's easy
06:17well you just volunteer for a community group or
06:20or help an old lady with a shopping
06:22oh do you need any shopping doing burning
06:25do you want to wear that omelette
06:27oh it's cute oh you don't think you're old
06:30you're still here
06:31you're low on loo roll
06:32I can wait
06:34it's just I need a full replenishment otherwise I get um performance anxiety
06:42oh she's a firecracker isn't she
06:44I bet she's a screen to live with
06:46oh she don't live with us
06:47listen I want to have a little wind up laugh kind of thing with her
06:51tell me a secret about her
06:53oh the verlin cairwoods gave her a piggyback in the press club
06:56did it that's amazing
06:58not want that peter cave
06:59if she were an animal what calm would she be
07:01quick before she comes back
07:14what are you doing
07:16I'm sorry
07:16Leanne left me a spare key
07:18I was looking for somewhere quiet to revise
07:19right
07:22okay sorry wow
07:23I mean bit of a shock to come out the bathroom and find a lurker
07:26you could have been anyone
07:27yeah I'm so sorry
07:29you could have let me know somehow
07:31sorry
07:36although that being said
07:38I do think it's a good idea to get cramming
07:40handing your coursework in late that one time
07:42slippery slope
07:44yeah but
07:45I mean make habit of it
07:46no red brick's gonna look twice at you
07:49right
07:53I have to go out now so
07:56well is it alright if I work here then
07:57if you let me know what time you're gonna be back I'll
08:00make sure I'm way gone by then
08:03hmm
08:05I'll be back by four
08:07okay
08:25now I've got brown sauce on it
08:27you've got to have brown sauce on a bacon sarnie it's the law
08:32love's young green
08:33hmm
08:35still stand by what I said earlier
08:37you're off your head
08:38it's true
08:40is it
08:40it is
08:42yeah
08:42ask yourself
08:44fire away
08:45ask me anything
08:46I am an open book
08:49you ask her
08:50you're the one who's obsessed
08:51it's a slight exaggeration
08:52come on now
08:53spill the tea
08:54as an old drag queen pal of mine used to say
08:57you've got a friend who's a drag queen
08:59gastric bland
09:01pure evil
09:02okay
09:02so
09:04Eva thinks that
09:05you made Lauren work the other night
09:07so she couldn't go out with Ollie
09:09that
09:09is an outrageous suggestion
09:13and yet
09:14scarily accurate
09:16thank you
09:17Lauren is not good enough for my grandson
09:20and if you think she is
09:21you want your heads testing
09:22well with respect ma
09:24that's a first
09:25I think it's probably up to Ollie
09:27who he does and doesn't date
09:28Lauren is a misery gut single mother
09:30from a bad family
09:31and a terrible history with men
09:33that might be fine for some people
09:35but not for my grandson
09:36well you don't sit on the fence ma
09:38you might get splinters on your cheeks
09:41mind you
09:42he wouldn't be the first man in this family
09:45to be blinded by an airhead bottle blonde
09:48with no concept of modesty
10:12did you see that
10:14I did
10:15I hope you're not waiting for your delivery of Conker Monthly
10:17yeah well I'm not a kid
10:19yeah I'm well aware of that
10:21so go on tell me
10:22Sam again
10:23what did you
10:24let himself into the flat
10:26while I was on the loo
10:27got a shock of my life
10:30what was he sniffing around for
10:32we need to stop him
10:33but we need to be clever
10:35have you ever heard of the phrase
10:36keep your friends close
10:37and your enemies closer
10:38yeah
10:40well
10:40I need you to be the good cop
10:42to my bad cop
10:43you cool with that
10:46it's hard to know what to say sometimes isn't it
10:49it is right yeah
10:52I suppose small talk's as good as anything
10:57oh my
11:02who did that here
11:03Debs
11:04oh if you mind
11:06they should see the other fella
11:08who was it
11:09eh
11:11it's just a misunderstanding over Somerton now
11:13but it
11:14it's all tickety-boo now
11:16so no fretting
11:19oh
11:20it's lovely to see you
11:23you alright Ronnie
11:25you look like you've got the weight of the world on your shoulders
11:28it's fine
11:28and so am I
11:29stop worrying about us
11:31there is something I
11:32I need to ask you actually
11:34and I don't know if this is going to come as a shock to you Kevin or not
11:36but
11:37eh
11:37sounds ominous
11:39and this is so ridiculous this but
11:42Carl
11:42er well
11:43he informed me
11:45allegedly that
11:46he is your son
11:50give over
11:51as if
11:52tell him Debs
11:55tell him
11:56you are kidding me
12:00I'm so sorry
12:04Carl
12:05he's um
12:09he's not your brother
12:12he's your nephew
12:31and that was that really
12:34we just
12:35all went along with it
12:38I was a child
12:40so
12:41I've spent my life
12:42being lied to
12:42by
12:43you
12:43my dad
12:45my dad
12:46who used to bang on about
12:47my boy
12:48Carl
12:49my wonderful son
12:51and all along
12:53who was his grandson
12:56they're just words
12:57they're just words
12:57Kev
12:57you all kept it from me
13:00that must have been hard work
13:02I bet he was all laughing behind me back
13:04weren't he
13:05what a mug Kevin is for
13:06falling for it
13:08gullible Kevin
13:09he'll believe in anything
13:10no
13:11he wasn't like that
13:13I did want my dad to move to Germany
13:15he said he really fancied that job
13:17but all along
13:18Kevin
13:18all along
13:19he wanted to run away
13:21with you Elaine
13:22and your grubby little secret
13:24right no
13:24sorry
13:25even when I saw him
13:26before he died
13:27he never mentioned it
13:29he guarded it
13:31till a better end
13:33well
13:35maybe he was waiting
13:36for me to mention it
13:39even when I was ready
13:42but you lie to yourself long enough
13:46comes true in your head eventually
13:49and I'd buried it
13:50hands-up deep inside me
13:51for what
13:53nearly 40 odd years
13:57not in a way it meant
13:58till one day
13:59I don't know
14:01the scales just fall
14:03from your eyes
14:03and it all just comes
14:04tumbling out
14:05so Carl knows
14:09yeah
14:10yeah I told him
14:12but only recently
14:14that's why you're carrying
14:16the can for him
14:18I knew it
14:19and you had me
14:19think I was going mad
14:21I'm sorry
14:23you were only here
14:25because of him
14:26what else could I do
14:28tell the truth
14:29don't mug me off
14:31you're right
14:33I made you think
14:34you got it wrong
14:37and I'm so sorry
14:38but
14:40I was scared
14:42I owe this to Carl
14:44you know when he said
14:45he went to live with Elaine
14:47well
14:48he had the most horrendous time
14:51he's broken Kev
14:54and if I hadn't
14:55have been so selfish
14:56if I'd have been
14:57a proper mum to him
15:00then
15:02maybe
15:03it wouldn't have
15:04turned out so bad
15:06okay
15:07you've done all this
15:08for Carl
15:10what's it doing to you
15:12look at you
15:13you've been here
15:14five minutes
15:14you're black and blue
15:15exactly
15:17how could he
15:19I'm alright
15:20look
15:20I don't care
15:21that Carl's your son
15:22he shouldn't be
15:24putting you through this
15:25he's raped
15:25well he's not
15:27is he
15:27I am
15:28this is my choice
15:30it is
15:31I could kill him
15:32for what he's done to you
15:34you don't mean that
15:35oh
15:37don't I
15:39she sent me another one
15:41who
15:42what
15:42Emily
15:43I've told you
15:45she keeps sending me
15:46spiritual pictures
15:47every day
15:48on a text
15:49and what's she sent you today
15:50well
15:52it's a picture of Jesus
15:54and he's knocking on a door
15:56and it says
15:57behold
16:00might need me glasses
16:01thought it was Demis Roussos
16:03and have you replied
16:04have I replied
16:05not yet
16:06will you
16:08I usually say
16:09very nice
16:10oh
16:11you want to send her
16:12one of those
16:13disappointing affirmations
16:15what's that
16:16oh you see them online
16:17it's a picture
16:18of a beach
16:20and it says
16:20you'll always be
16:22mediocre
16:23I can't send that to
16:25she's my friend
16:28I might send one to Jenny
16:29because she's got
16:30a good sense of unity
16:32look what I found
16:33shoved in a bin
16:33on the precinct
16:34property of the cabin
16:35I believe
16:37right
16:37right
16:38look at that
16:39those must be the worst fortune
16:41Lily was in charge of that
16:43wait till I get my hands on her
16:45oh you can't say that nowadays
16:46well listen
16:47thanks for returning them
16:48hope
16:49shoved
16:50in a bin you say
16:51yeah
16:52do you think
16:53do you think
16:53maybe you'd be able
16:54to help me get my
16:54D of E badge
16:55you know
16:55because I've done a good deed
16:57and all that
16:58I don't think it's completely
16:59badge worthy
17:00well yeah
17:00but like
17:01I have to do some
17:02volunteering work
17:03so if you ever need
17:04some shopping doing
17:04an extra pair of hands
17:05if I was wanting to be a lady
17:07in waiting to Queen Rita
17:08well
17:09yes
17:09it might be very nice
17:11to have a little bit of help
17:12every now and then
17:13oh
17:14hey
17:15Mary
17:15Mary
17:16yes
17:18oh
17:20come here Brian
17:21yep
17:21we're nearly there
17:23would you like me to walk you to her
17:25er
17:25no no
17:26I'll be fine love
17:27I'm fine I'm fine
17:28oh but
17:29do you need a wheelchair then
17:30no
17:31yes
17:32a wheelchair
17:34to run you over
17:36get out of it
17:38so
17:40Lauren
17:42did you enjoy that
17:43what do you think of her
17:44be honest
17:45here we go
17:47no feedback for the chef eh
17:48don't avoid the question
17:51snap
17:52er
17:53well
17:54she's nice
17:56right
17:56we have a laugh
17:59also
17:59baby
18:00what about it
18:02she has one
18:03unfortunately
18:04you never had a problem
18:05with Dee Dee having one
18:06Lauren
18:07is not a solicitor
18:09with prospects
18:10mind you
18:11I'm sure she's done
18:12some soliciting
18:13in her time
18:14just
18:14not of the legal
18:15variety
18:19come on
18:20how do you
18:21envisage your life
18:23you're a strapping lad
18:25full of beans
18:26do you really see yourself
18:28stopping in every night
18:29doing feeds
18:30and watching the telly
18:31er
18:31wouldn't it be more
18:32exciting to have
18:33spontaneous nights away
18:35in spa hotels
18:36or
18:37weekend city breaks
18:39in far flung
18:40corners of the globe
18:41she is a laugh
18:42really
18:42really
18:43because from where
18:44I'm sitting
18:45she's no Marty Cain
18:46you won't know
18:46who that is
18:47who
18:47told you
18:48exactly
18:50there's only so much
18:51grown up fun
18:52you can have
18:53with an ankle
18:54biter
18:54following your
18:55every move
18:56she finds it hard
18:57enough to go
18:58childcare
18:58when she's doing
18:59shifts in this place
19:00let alone off
19:01gallivanting
19:02with fellas
19:05I'll say no more
19:06on the matter
19:07it's your life
19:09that you're
19:10throwing away
19:15look I know
19:16you've chosen to do
19:16your maths GCSE
19:17a year early
19:18but I think it's too much
19:19it's not
19:20you're overdoing it
19:21the stress
19:22what force are you
19:23can say you got a
19:24qualification a year early
19:25I mean who cares
19:26I care
19:27now leave me alone
19:28people won't serve you
19:29right well I haven't
19:30finished with you
19:31a year you have
19:34ah ladies
19:35will you be dining
19:36with us this afternoon
19:37oh just liquid
19:39but a nice table
19:40wouldn't it go a miss
19:41yes walk this way
19:43you know what I can't
19:44abide Rita
19:45it's when somebody
19:46says walk this way
19:47and then they do a
19:48silly walk and expect
19:49you to copy them
19:49I feel like punching
19:50them don't you
19:51shall I tell you
19:52what irritates me
19:53what's that
19:54Rick Petit
19:55folk who link me
19:56when I haven't asked
19:57them
19:58oh
20:00posh bottle of
20:01red nick
20:02cheese fame
20:10come in peace
20:12how do you mean
20:13well you know
20:14I know things haven't
20:15exactly been the
20:16greatest between
20:16you and me
20:18guess not
20:19well so you know
20:20I want us to be
20:20mates
20:21you know
20:22we are practically
20:23family
20:23and I remember
20:25you mentioning
20:25in a while back
20:26gig tonight
20:27at the new
20:28century hall
20:29yeah the oasis
20:30tribute pack
20:30yeah I thought
20:31we could go together
20:32so I got some
20:33tickets
20:59yeah yeah fine I can
21:01hold
21:02what are you playing
21:06at
21:07do you not
21:08understand what
21:08you've done
21:09my terminal
21:10ill wife
21:10your mother
21:11you've let her
21:12do birth
21:12for something
21:13you did
21:13what she told you
21:15that
21:15you can see the
21:16state of her in
21:17there she's been
21:17beaten up and
21:18everything
21:19yeah I know the
21:20feeling
21:21don't bring your
21:22part up
21:23listen to me
21:24because I hate
21:24repeating myself
21:25you've got to do
21:26the right thing
21:27by Debbie
21:28how
21:29you've got to
21:29tell the police
21:30the truth
21:31get her released
21:32because if you
21:33don't mate
21:34your life
21:35ain't gonna be
21:36worth living
21:37what you think
21:38I'm scared of you
21:38muppets
21:39no no leave him
21:40Ronnie
21:41Ronnie
21:41leave him
21:43you've heard
21:43what I've said
21:44you've heard
21:46you've heard
22:11you've heard
22:12you've said
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