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The Worst Film Festival Ever [Full Movie] [Trending Drama]Full EP - Full
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00:01:47That's a shit. Solid gold shit.
00:01:52Tug Speedman, I'm just not the biggest fan.
00:01:56A father with money and an idiot with an expensive habit, the transition from drugs to moviemaking
00:02:02has been glorious for us.
00:02:04The problem with Tug Speedman movies are his endings.
00:02:06Well, it's not just the endings. We even got shortchanged on the nudity. Esme Presley
00:02:12used a body double. I just had a thought. What do you think if I asked you to present
00:02:19the awards?
00:02:19Oh, Gabriel, let me stop you there. I'm not presenting these awards.
00:02:23Well, that would be a mistake. A missed opportunity for you, Will the Farmer. With some brand.
00:02:31Gabriel, your little festival, it's a low-rent nightmare. Whatever bullshit you've done to
00:02:36get this accredited by the Academy, it's a win here. Honestly, I don't want to be part
00:02:39of it when it all goes tits up.
00:02:41It's all showbiz, Will. And you are one of the greats. This is an opportunity that should
00:02:46be grabbed with both hands.
00:02:47Gabriel, please. Please don't bullshit me.
00:02:50Put on a show, Will. Razzle dazzle them. It will be you that they'll remember.
00:02:57I don't want to present an award to a shit Tarantino wannabe Tug Speedman.
00:03:01Truth is stranger than fiction, Will. Look, why don't you stay, listen to the key speaker
00:03:07talk and then see how you feel.
00:03:09Do you know what? I don't feel well, Gabriel.
00:03:14That was funny, innit?
00:03:15If you've got a tractor, you're a farmer. If you don't, you're just a gardener.
00:03:19Do you know what? I am not sitting here listening to that.
00:03:25Gabriel? Are you alright?
00:03:28Uh-huh.
00:03:30Uh-huh.
00:03:31Oh-huh.
00:03:32Oh-huh.
00:03:33uh-huh.
00:04:01Oh
00:04:10Hello Giggles. Didn't know we were going to be a threesome tonight.
00:04:13What's the point in having a phone if you don't read your messages?
00:04:17Oh shit, sorry, I've been avoiding my dad all day, so phone.
00:04:23I'm breaking up with you.
00:04:26Okay.
00:04:27It's not you, it's your dad.
00:04:31Huh?
00:04:32Not in that way, just the way he controls everything you do.
00:04:39I'm waiting for the punchline here, but I'm sensing it's not coming.
00:04:44My dad is just my dad, like, I'm my own boss.
00:04:51Okay, but that is five unread messages, which I'm not going to read.
00:04:57I'm with Giggles.
00:05:00Caroline, I thought we were going to make a movie together.
00:05:04I think we're both done with that.
00:05:06You know, you know what, I think I'm just going to...
00:05:25Oh God, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
00:05:27I was just going to front me.
00:05:53Oh God, sorry, sorry my dad's out.
00:05:57That's only a tiny point.
00:05:57you been? He's having a heart attack. Will the farmer? And a cow jumped over
00:06:02the moon. No, dad, I'm sorry. Gabriel, everything's going to be okay. Alan's here now.
00:06:08Listen to me, son. Do you want to make it in this business or fold shirts at the Chinese
00:06:14laundromat? Pledge. Um, how sure are we that this was a heart attack?
00:06:20It's not. The film festival. The film festival goes ahead.
00:06:26You're in charge. Gabriel, talk about this at the hospital. Where is this ambulance?
00:06:30Ambulance is on the way. No, dad, dad, cancel the film festival.
00:06:34Alan, I am not willing to donate a kidney, but I am willing to watch you die slowly,
00:06:40if you're looking for that kind of thing. Huh.
00:06:45Any idea what you're going to do? No, no, Will, I don't.
00:06:49Well, good luck with everything. Will the farmer to present best picture?
00:06:54Oh.
00:06:56Oh.
00:07:13Somebody I'm not, I don't want to be somebody I'm not standing in the shoes of someone I'm not.
00:07:32I got this feeling that I'm always gonna lose. I guess I know someday I'm gonna have to choose.
00:07:41Cause I don't want to be somebody I'm not.
00:07:54Cause I don't want to be somebody I'm not standing in the shoes of someone I'm not.
00:08:15Cause I don't want to be somebody I'm not.
00:08:36I don't want to be somebody I'm not.
00:08:39Cause I don't want to be somebody I'm not.
00:08:39So it grows seems like I'm runnin' blind.
00:08:48But oh, you know it's like I'm stuck in time.
00:09:16Somebody I'm not
00:09:19I don't wanna be
00:09:21Somebody I'm not
00:09:23Standing in the shoes of somebody
00:09:26I'm not
00:09:29You know, I think I'm gonna faint if we don't eat soon
00:09:33There's a Costa Starbucks back at the station
00:09:36I can get those anywhere
00:09:38I need authentic Edinburghan food
00:09:42I don't know if it's an actual word
00:09:44But it is now anyway
00:09:47Um, there's a greasy spoon three blocks from here
00:09:52Authentic Scottish cafe it says
00:09:54Perfect word
00:09:55I'm gonna use it in a sentence
00:09:58I just did
00:10:05Where are all these Scottish fruits have been sold about?
00:10:10You're gonna cop a flower pot if you don't move them trotters
00:10:15At her butt
00:10:17Oh my god
00:10:25Are you sure?
00:10:28Of course
00:10:28She's got no reason to lie, is she?
00:10:31Can we go home then?
00:10:32Alan's sorting it out
00:10:35That can't be good
00:10:42Come on
00:10:53How's it going?
00:10:54Uh, a few technical issues
00:10:56Uh, but then again it's an old laptop so I probably need some replacing
00:11:00She means your dad, Alan
00:11:01Oh god, um
00:11:04Yeah, better, I think
00:11:05Uh, he left me a three-page text message this morning that he signed off with
00:11:09And don't mess this up
00:11:11So it's safe to say he's back at the farm on this festival
00:11:16That'll be fine
00:11:19See, he's working
00:11:21And gone again
00:11:22Mm-hmm
00:11:23Yeah
00:11:27He's fucked
00:11:33Will!
00:11:35Gabriel's on the mend, that's good
00:11:36Look, Will, I still need a key speaker
00:11:38Please check out time for me
00:11:40No, Will, please, I'll give you anything, okay?
00:11:42I have a kidney you can have, it's barely been used
00:11:45When you get chased by a pack of taxidermists, don't play dead
00:12:06Er, is there no one here to meet us?
00:12:08It's fine, we'll just grab a taxi
00:12:11Did you not order car service?
00:12:13Oh, I'm sorry, I'll just bung it on my credit card, shall I?
00:12:17There's no budget for this trip
00:12:21No, no, no, no, no, seriously
00:12:31Good news or bad?
00:12:32My father would say this is a challenge
00:12:35So bad, then?
00:12:36Yeah, it's not good
00:12:36Er, one of my key speakers has pulled out, he's got the flu
00:12:39One of the criteria for qualifying for an Academy Award
00:12:42Is you must provide at least two key speakers to tell you movies are good
00:12:49Alright, okay, it's fine, just breathe
00:12:54That's it
00:12:54Not the first guy to have a panic attack on us
00:12:57Look, if my dad doesn't kill me, Doug Speedman will
00:13:00Gods was a good movie, the ending wasn't much though
00:13:03No, his father is paying for the festival
00:13:06You know this isn't your fault, right?
00:13:08Yes, but my dad can make it my fault
00:13:10Right, first things last, what's a key speaker?
00:13:14Oh, I don't know, it's got to be an actor or a celebrity
00:13:17Someone who can talk about their experience making movies with the other filmmakers
00:13:27Rachel
00:13:28Oh shit, yeah, Rachel Warren
00:13:30Who is Rachel Warren?
00:13:31Rachel, Rachel, Rachel
00:13:35She did that stupid werewolf movie with Jess
00:13:38It's in the festival
00:13:39Can you get her?
00:13:41Yeah, I know her well
00:13:42I'm sure she'd love to come and be your celebrity
00:13:49You have no idea where we're going
00:13:52Yes, I do
00:13:58It's this way, come on
00:14:02We made a movie about Chinese families in the 18th century
00:14:06Stories about mothers and daughters
00:14:12This country makes no sense
00:14:20You don't have to marry this woman
00:14:22You don't have to marry this woman
00:14:23You don't have to marry this woman
00:14:26I don't have to marry you
00:14:27I hate you
00:14:31This family is a nice place to know
00:14:34Our family is the most rich
00:14:48Hey, remember what we spoke about?
00:14:51Yeah, yeah, Dad.
00:14:53No day joking.
00:14:55Hi, we're Ashraf and...
00:14:58Millie.
00:14:59I thought we was going home with Millicent.
00:15:02We made Milicious Incent.
00:15:10Do I think we can win?
00:15:12Fuck yeah.
00:15:13Right, babe?
00:15:15Well, forget winning.
00:15:16I mean, I'm just here for the fit guys with their sexy Scottish brogue.
00:15:21I mean, I haven't met any just yet, but I did spot this guy.
00:15:24He looked a little bit like Chris Hemsworth on the plane.
00:15:26You know, the guy from Thor.
00:15:28I mean, given the chance, I didn't.
00:15:29I was Thor.
00:15:32You do know I'm not one of your pals, don't you?
00:15:34You know, I can't just un-hear this stuff.
00:15:38Oh, well.
00:15:41I'm not really hungry.
00:15:44Nominations for Best Actress are...
00:15:47Fran Whittaker for Hey, Mr. DJ.
00:16:00I can explain.
00:16:01I want you to leave.
00:16:04Out of my house.
00:16:13What's black pudding?
00:16:15It's pork of beef blood mixed with oatmeal and fried.
00:16:18Are we in the same country?
00:16:21No.
00:16:21We're in Scotland.
00:16:24Esme Presley, poor gods of Shoreditch.
00:16:26Your sword skills do you a disservice, sir.
00:16:28The seal calls to you, but it is lying.
00:16:33That may be so.
00:16:35The seal is our portal to the future.
00:16:38It is the devil's work.
00:16:40Then the devil does fine work.
00:16:42How are the nominations?
00:16:43Oh, yeah.
00:16:44It's in the back.
00:16:59Hi, guys.
00:17:00We're the Kidnap Gang, and we do kidnap pranks.
00:17:03This is my partner, Darren.
00:17:05Hello, hello.
00:17:07Now, obviously, we've entered two films into the festivals,
00:17:10which doubles our chances of winning something.
00:17:14But, look, I've got to warn you,
00:17:16when we're about, there's always some fuckery afoot.
00:17:19Idiots.
00:17:20Both my dad and my uncle.
00:17:22Well, Gabriel, the guy who runs the festival,
00:17:24he invited us along.
00:17:25He thought we'd be some good entertainment.
00:17:42Joking, we got her.
00:17:43You didn't.
00:17:44She said she'll do it.
00:17:45Thanks, little madam.
00:17:46Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you so much.
00:17:49Sorry, I'm not really a hugger, but you know what I mean.
00:17:51She said she'd like working with me,
00:17:53and the movie's nominated in the festival.
00:17:55You'll cover travel and bar bill.
00:17:57Yeah, bar bill?
00:17:58Yeah, but don't worry about that now.
00:18:00You have a speaker.
00:18:02Hey, is this an exclusive party,
00:18:04or can anybody join in?
00:18:05Doug, you're here!
00:18:07Alert the paparazzi.
00:18:09That's good, that's good things, dude.
00:18:10No, seriously.
00:18:11Alert the paparazzi.
00:18:12Your dad has press at the awards.
00:18:16How are you?
00:18:17Jade.
00:18:18And what movie are you with?
00:18:19Sex.
00:18:20Hmm.
00:18:22Well, your film sounds interesting,
00:18:24and equally your name.
00:18:26Both subjects I'd love to learn more about.
00:18:30Tug Speedman.
00:18:32Actor, writer, filmmaker.
00:18:35Triple tread.
00:18:35Pow!
00:18:36Tug, have you checked in yet?
00:18:38It's actually just this way.
00:18:39I'll just show you where it is.
00:18:40I want that review.
00:18:49Listen, man.
00:18:51I didn't want to say anything in there.
00:18:53I didn't want to embarrass you.
00:18:55There was no one there to meet us at the airport.
00:18:57Oh, I didn't know we were...
00:19:00You know what?
00:19:00Technical issues.
00:19:03Get it together, man.
00:19:05You do realise what a big deal this is,
00:19:07to have me and my movie playing exclusively at your festival.
00:19:12Of course.
00:19:14I thought I played in Ireland.
00:19:17That wasn't a film festival.
00:19:19That was a tent with a projector.
00:19:21Right.
00:19:22No, this...
00:19:24This is the one we've been waiting for.
00:19:27Academy qualifying.
00:19:29You do realise this is going to be huge for my movie.
00:19:32And for your festival.
00:19:36Yes, I'll get it together.
00:19:44We're in room 175.
00:19:47Esme Presley.
00:19:49That's my name.
00:19:50Don't wear it out.
00:19:55Don't mess this up.
00:19:57Right.
00:20:01Please let me help you with your bag.
00:20:03I'd be much obliged.
00:20:05He likes people to think I'm his assistant.
00:20:07Yeah, he's certainly a character with a small C.
00:20:11No, he's definitely something with a small C.
00:20:22We're going to need to separate these.
00:20:25Oh, like a twin room?
00:20:28Don't get me started.
00:20:30Tud likes his space to sleep.
00:20:32Proper diva.
00:20:36You can put that down.
00:20:38Oh, God.
00:20:39Yeah, sorry.
00:20:41Is there a turndown service or do I tip?
00:20:45Oh, no, no.
00:20:45I'm just helping.
00:20:48Just a thanks, then.
00:20:51Instant coffee.
00:20:52I liked your movie.
00:20:55Well, no, I liked your role in it.
00:21:00It's okay.
00:21:01You can say it's crap.
00:21:02It is.
00:21:02No, no, it's not crap.
00:21:03It's just, uh, it's unusual.
00:21:06It's time-traveling gangsters, so.
00:21:09But it's up for best picture, and it's probably going to get the Oscar qualifying spot, so what do I
00:21:13know?
00:21:14Alan.
00:21:15That's your name, right?
00:21:16The festival director's son.
00:21:19Tug Speedman's a hack.
00:21:20And worse, a hack with a father with money.
00:21:23The writer's inspiration for Gods of Shoreditch was a story with strong female characters who brought about the end of
00:21:29the world of men.
00:21:31Instead, Tug turned a brilliant script into a wannabe gangster action movie.
00:21:36With so much nudity, it could have been set in ancient Rome.
00:21:40Oh, I mean, I thought that it was...
00:21:42Sorry, darling.
00:21:42Body doubles for those scenes.
00:21:44Oh, no, no, I wasn't being weird.
00:21:46I was just...
00:21:46Alan, it's fine.
00:21:47I limit who sees me naked, including Tug.
00:21:52Oh, you thought...
00:21:54Alan, no.
00:21:55Hasn't been like that for a very long time.
00:21:58Tug, I imagine, is currently down in the bar, flirting with any tart, unlucky enough to be with an earshot.
00:22:10I know his father paid for the movie to win, and I'm fine with it.
00:22:14Oh.
00:22:16Alan.
00:22:17Um, yes.
00:22:20Do you want a coffee?
00:22:26That's my dad.
00:22:27Um, I should.
00:22:28I didn't see him, Lance.
00:22:29Is that something okay?
00:22:32Complicated, but...
00:22:34Yeah.
00:23:01Hello, my dad.
00:23:03You all right?
00:23:04Um, yeah, all good.
00:23:06Um, the abduce kit is here.
00:23:08Okay.
00:23:14Yes, we made a movie called Sex.
00:23:27At first, there was nothing.
00:23:31Then, there was woman.
00:23:45So, with the role of the woman is the sole provider, the one giving the pain is the only one
00:23:50that can take it away.
00:23:50My role is to assistive clients, but I'm also an actress.
00:23:55Oh, not again with that stupid werewolf movie with Rachel.
00:24:00Rachel was amazing to work with.
00:24:03And you two.
00:24:04Yeah.
00:24:05And you two.
00:24:05But both equally.
00:24:07Yeah, of course.
00:24:08Do you know what?
00:24:09Whatever, I don't care.
00:24:10Anyway.
00:24:10Can somebody take this off, please?
00:24:24You have 12 finalists in your festival this year?
00:24:28Uh, yes.
00:24:29They are the final 12.
00:24:31The opening ceremony is tonight, and there will be a party.
00:24:36Not quite a party person.
00:24:39Hmm.
00:24:41Each film has been individually assessed and announced within the required time period?
00:24:46Yes.
00:24:47Uh, no formal queries from the other candidates.
00:24:50Uh, and my father has done all of the, uh, assessments.
00:24:54Your father?
00:24:56Yes.
00:24:57Spoke to him many times.
00:24:59On the phone.
00:25:01Never met.
00:25:02Where is he?
00:25:05Currently sorting out, um, something or other.
00:25:08You know what these crazy filmmakers are like.
00:25:13No!
00:25:21I'm absolutely mortified.
00:25:23I didn't mind, really.
00:25:25It was kind of fun.
00:25:26A bunch of kids, them too, honestly.
00:25:35Very amusing.
00:25:38My preference is to sit near the back and on the aisle for each showing.
00:25:45Yes, we can accommodate that.
00:25:47Your father is the signatory for the festival.
00:25:51Have him speak to me at his earliest convenience.
00:25:54Of course.
00:25:55No, no problem.
00:25:57Would you excuse me?
00:25:58I need to go and sort out a thing.
00:26:02I need to go and sort out a thing.
00:26:27I need to go and sort out a thing.
00:26:28I need to do it.
00:26:38Now, good morning to you.
00:26:42Need an actress?
00:26:44Yes, I am.
00:26:46Well...
00:26:47No, no, no, no.
00:26:48You have certainly got the look.
00:26:50As if.
00:26:51He's like some old guy.
00:26:54You play your cards, right?
00:26:56I might just let you audition for me sometime.
00:26:59So, obviously, networking is the best part of these events.
00:27:03Before Tug realises I'm a tease,
00:27:06his next movie will already be out, starring me.
00:27:12I thought you might be hungry.
00:27:16But the breakfasts are meant to be for the film contestants.
00:27:20But, yeah, they're not going to miss it, are they?
00:27:23They're adjudicated by your story?
00:27:25Mm-hmm.
00:27:26Jade.
00:27:27Ah.
00:27:27How is your father doing?
00:27:29Still in the hospital, and I think, I think,
00:27:32Tug Speedman might just kill me when he finds out.
00:27:35So have you.
00:27:36I always wanted to be an actress, then.
00:27:38Come on, move along, Romeo.
00:27:40There's a cue here.
00:27:42I'll talk to you later.
00:27:47You seem to be doing okay so far.
00:27:49Just a few more days.
00:27:51Tug will be happy once he gets his coveted Academy place.
00:27:54Do you like working with him?
00:27:55You don't work with Tug.
00:27:57You experience the carnage he leaves in his wake.
00:28:00You get used to the crazy after a few years.
00:28:02Yeah, I was going to pitch my film to him.
00:28:04The God Particle.
00:28:06Yeah, I optioned the third book, but I tell you what,
00:28:09an award-nominated actress would look great on the cast list.
00:28:12This is a shit business, Alan.
00:28:14You can do your best performance
00:28:15and some hack director fumbles the ball in the edit.
00:28:19Hey, no, your character, Joe Marsh,
00:28:21in Gods of Shortage was amazing.
00:28:22Ted's not asked, don't make a movie.
00:28:24At least my body double had a good bum.
00:28:30The God Particle is a black ops super soldier
00:28:35who seeks vengeance after they have been betrayed
00:28:38on a mission gone terribly wrong.
00:28:40Good pitch.
00:28:41Yeah, but without Esme Presley in it,
00:28:43it's just another silly spy adventure.
00:28:48Actually, can you just give me a full second, please?
00:28:53Alan!
00:28:54My man!
00:28:55How are we?
00:28:56Right, are we all set for my screening?
00:28:57Yes, of course, um...
00:28:59Emmett?
00:28:59Emmett, yes.
00:29:00Yes, no, it's only because I heard there was some, like, technical issues.
00:29:03Who told you that?
00:29:04No, never mind.
00:29:05No, everything's fine.
00:29:06We're good to go.
00:29:07Perfect.
00:29:07So, yeah, we made a horror movie.
00:29:10Yes, I play a maid.
00:29:12Don't you play a maid in Jade's movie too?
00:29:14Typecasting is a good thing.
00:29:16Did you actually watch the movies?
00:29:17Have you seen mine?
00:29:18It's got Rachel on it.
00:29:19Uh, no, my dad watches the films.
00:29:20It's more his thing.
00:29:21Oh, hi!
00:29:23Hey.
00:29:24Um, the breakfasts are actually just for the film candidates, so, uh...
00:29:28I appreciate it.
00:29:29Yeah.
00:29:30Yeah, no, so that means...
00:29:33Sorry.
00:29:34But what if I was a film contestant?
00:29:39Okay, okay, look.
00:29:41If you want to go, like, just, like, wait in the lobby,
00:29:43I'll wait till they're all gone,
00:29:44I'll come give you a shout, and...
00:29:46How'd they prompt the application form from the library?
00:29:48That was a nightmare while I had inked.
00:29:50So, like, sorry.
00:29:51I ain't taking a blame for that.
00:29:53Hang on, you've made a movie?
00:29:55Sure.
00:29:55Just like all the cats up in this geth.
00:29:58It's a personal story.
00:29:59A flick about living on the streets.
00:30:01Mike in your face.
00:30:04That's...
00:30:04That's actually really impressive.
00:30:06I'm not sure how you do...
00:30:08Check it.
00:30:09Shot on a phone.
00:30:11Edited at a library.
00:30:12The equipment was 90s.
00:30:13But it's all good.
00:30:15Uh, well, that is all good,
00:30:18but, um,
00:30:19the application's closed, uh,
00:30:21two months ago now, so...
00:30:23Understands completely.
00:30:24But listen here,
00:30:25I ain't interested in what you're selling.
00:30:27For me,
00:30:27this is a golden opportunity of honest food
00:30:29and a bed for the night.
00:30:32Please, I really don't know how else to say this,
00:30:35but all of the final films have been announced.
00:30:39We can't add this.
00:30:41That's how it is.
00:30:43Sorry, what's your name?
00:30:45Mike.
00:30:46Iron Mike.
00:30:47Wow.
00:30:48Intimidating name.
00:30:49It's cause we're embedding down.
00:30:51I have, like, three iron baths tied together.
00:30:53So, Iron Mike.
00:30:54Makes perfect sense.
00:30:56Listen,
00:30:57Alan's gonna take your application
00:30:59because he's good at problem solving
00:31:00and he very much wants to impress me.
00:31:04I don't know, I was thinking...
00:31:05What was that?
00:31:07Simple.
00:31:08You did a very kind thing for a homeless man
00:31:09and it did impress me.
00:31:11Okay, yeah, that is very nice,
00:31:12but all the films have already been announced, Esme.
00:31:14I don't think he cares.
00:31:17Morning.
00:31:18Oh, shit.
00:31:19I mean, morning!
00:31:21Your father down for breakfast?
00:31:23Uh, you know, he was,
00:31:25but he's an early riser,
00:31:26so you know how it is.
00:31:27We're just going to meet him now.
00:31:29The signatory is a very important part of the process.
00:31:33Of course.
00:31:41I played Lord Harrington of Mortar.
00:31:48Beast must die.
00:31:52Whatever you think's best.
00:31:58I'm now unarmed
00:32:01and I'll prevent you from doing your duty.
00:32:07Maybe she should kill us both.
00:32:10You've been bitten, Mistress.
00:32:15The wolf
00:32:19courses
00:32:20through my veins.
00:32:23Run!
00:32:27So, yeah,
00:32:28it's a movie with a werewolf in it.
00:32:31Is this the heights that we're together?
00:32:34In the movie?
00:32:36Look,
00:32:37I spent a lot of time
00:32:38and energy
00:32:39into this ending
00:32:40and trust me,
00:32:42once people see what we've done here,
00:32:45it's best to feel
00:32:46when winners might.
00:32:47Ours.
00:32:49And everyone that was in the movie.
00:32:52Gew Moreover,
00:32:54No.
00:33:01J
00:33:01I
00:33:02I
00:33:03I
00:33:03I
00:33:04be
00:33:05I
00:33:05I
00:33:05I
00:33:05I
00:33:07I
00:33:29Agnes, I just...
00:33:31I'm sorry for frightening you, Lady Harrington.
00:33:36Callum, go back to the house.
00:33:41Elizabeth.
00:33:44Now.
00:34:09No, no, not now!
00:34:12Everyone look into the...
00:34:20God damn it!
00:34:21No one saw the ending!
00:34:32Come here.
00:34:38It was just an utter shit show.
00:34:41I was pretty awesome as the maid.
00:34:53Are you okay?
00:35:05Are you fucking kidding me?!
00:35:08Did you just leave and come back so you could do that?
00:35:11Take some water.
00:35:13Fuck water!
00:35:14I want some fucking cocaine!
00:35:17Oh fuck.
00:35:19Just call my fucking sponsor.
00:35:23You.
00:35:25Is your pathetic father gonna make it or not?
00:35:28Tell me.
00:35:29I don't know, but I'm obviously hoping.
00:35:32It's not his fault.
00:35:36Of course you knew!
00:35:38Everybody knows except poor old Tug!
00:35:41It wasn't like that.
00:35:43Look, as long as the adjudicator doesn't find out, we're fine.
00:35:45We're fine.
00:35:47We're fine.
00:35:49We're fine.
00:35:50Yeah, we're fine.
00:35:51Yeah, we're fine.
00:35:51Until he visits your poor little Siebel dad on his fucking deathbed!
00:35:56Tug, his father's still alive.
00:35:58Take that back.
00:35:59I'll tell you one thing, boyo.
00:36:01He's not gonna be alive when my dad gets his hands on him.
00:36:04Or if you make this go catch up!
00:36:11You.
00:36:12I'm going to the bar.
00:36:15Fuck my sponsor.
00:36:36Really?
00:36:38I thought you had to call your sponsor.
00:36:42You didn't drink it.
00:36:43But you thought about it.
00:36:46And you promised.
00:36:49Go away, Esme.
00:36:51I'm not cleaning up after you again.
00:36:55Well, do you know what, Mum?
00:36:58Do you know what I'm gonna get you for Christmas?
00:37:00A nice big wooden cross.
00:37:02So next time you feel unappreciated for all your sacrifices,
00:37:07you can climb on up there and nail yourself to it.
00:37:17Marcus!
00:37:26What are you?
00:37:27What are you doing?
00:37:34Yes, the movie did well.
00:37:36We are very proud.
00:37:46The adjudicator, of course, he picks the winner.
00:37:50You are good, right?
00:37:52Yes, you are good.
00:37:53That is not correct.
00:37:55He's just an official.
00:37:56Gabriel chose the winner.
00:37:58I know, Alan.
00:38:00And I hope we have made a big impression on him and his father, Gabriel.
00:38:04We do rap movie next.
00:38:07No, not.
00:38:09No, no, I'm a mother.
00:38:10No, what will do you do?
00:38:12No, I'm a father.
00:38:13No, no, I'm a dad.
00:38:17I'm a girl.
00:38:29Who do you?
00:38:31Who do you?
00:38:35but some are more comfortable than others.
00:38:39I think sometimes nudity is considered controversial in some cultures
00:38:44because it challenges the standards of modesty.
00:38:48Yes, exactly. Nudity, it's a state of mind.
00:38:53I'll happily wander around the house all day with no clothes on,
00:38:56just let it all hang out, feel that breeze.
00:39:00It's quite liberating.
00:39:03Would I be shallow if I said size doesn't matter?
00:39:11It's perfectly adequate.
00:39:18Is it true that it's all a farce?
00:39:21I don't really know.
00:39:23Well, you seem very close with Ellen.
00:39:26He must have told you something.
00:39:28This is starting to feel like an intervention.
00:39:30Or maybe an interrogation.
00:39:32It's because everyone is hiding something.
00:39:35Esme, we're just curious.
00:39:38This festival is really important to us.
00:39:41We have vested interest.
00:39:44Look, I don't want to speak out of turn and I understand that you guys are anxious,
00:39:50but really you have to speak to Alan about this.
00:39:52Oh, we will. Don't you worry about that.
00:39:58The mountain has arrived.
00:40:01You know, we all know that you're here.
00:40:04Can you help with this, please?
00:40:05They know, Alan. You might as well just tell me the truth.
00:40:08The truth will set you free.
00:40:10Okay, I've spoken to my dad in the hospital. He is getting better.
00:40:14It is a question of whether he can do the sign off, though.
00:40:18No, he can't. Not while he's in hospital.
00:40:20What's the sign off?
00:40:22The festival director has to sign off on the adjudicator's paperwork.
00:40:26Can't Alan do that?
00:40:28Are you the festival director, Alan?
00:40:30No, I'm the...
00:40:31Yeah, not the festival director, then.
00:40:34What's that smell?
00:40:37Listen, monkey boy, I swear to God and the Sonny Jesus,
00:40:42if you don't find a solution, I'm going to dropkick your head.
00:40:46And I've done seven days. Intensive stage combat.
00:40:50You watch yourself.
00:41:03Forget the gold particle this is producing.
00:41:06Oh, yeah, just without the money or the credit.
00:41:09You'll cut out for greater things.
00:41:11Yeah, well, you clearly haven't met my dad.
00:41:13He's going to kill my movie.
00:41:16Still living in his shadow, just like Tug.
00:41:18He'd own own self to be true.
00:41:20Yeah, well, that's really easy for you to say.
00:41:22You're an award-winning actress with a string of movie titles behind you
00:41:25and I'm just...
00:41:25And you're currently a festival director.
00:41:29Ah, yeah, I see.
00:41:30Trying to sway influence with the festival director
00:41:32to try and win an award.
00:41:33It's not going to work.
00:41:35Oh, my, what's a girl got to do?
00:41:39Mate, borrow your shaver?
00:41:42Yeah, sure, whatever you need.
00:41:44Keep that towel on and I'll cut your hair.
00:41:48Hotel cleaning service?
00:41:49Sure.
00:41:51Mike, can we grab a look at your movie?
00:41:53Sure.
00:41:55It's your funeral.
00:42:04Well, this is it.
00:42:06This is where Iron Mike is staying tonight.
00:42:10Because I did have three iron bathtubs.
00:42:13They were all tied together.
00:42:15And it was really, really, really good.
00:42:17Always get a wee check on the buns,
00:42:19because you just don't know what's on these buns.
00:42:22Mike, this is good.
00:42:26And phone boxes.
00:42:29Always keep your eye out for them.
00:42:30A lot of people miss them.
00:42:32It's really good.
00:42:33It's really good.
00:42:50Fuck.
00:43:02Well...
00:43:13You, er...
00:43:14You calm down, ya?
00:43:17Can I sit?
00:43:18Help yourself, you usually do.
00:43:21I wake up this morning and you're gone.
00:43:23Didn't think you'd notice they're intensely snoring.
00:43:28I'm at a loss here, Esme.
00:43:30What's going on?
00:43:33Do you remember the little talk me and you had?
00:43:35I support you, you support me.
00:43:39That's all I ever do, is support you.
00:43:42Yeah, well, you've been missing in action all weekend.
00:43:46I've been here all this time.
00:43:48The question is, where have you been?
00:43:51Clever.
00:43:53How's that working out for you?
00:43:57That's the thing about relationships.
00:43:59They give you reason to live.
00:44:02Revenge.
00:44:04Hey, hey, do you remember this?
00:44:07I've heard there was a secret chord.
00:44:10No.
00:44:10That David played, it pleased the Lord.
00:44:14But you don't really care for movies, do ya?
00:44:19It goes like this, the fourth, the fifth.
00:44:23Sit down.
00:44:24The major falls, the minor lifts.
00:44:28The baffled king composing, hallelujah.
00:44:34No?
00:44:36Those old cheap moves aren't going to work on me anymore.
00:44:39I've got plenty of new cheap moves for you.
00:44:41How are you going to face all these people when they find out you paid for the award?
00:44:45The question is, babe.
00:44:48Do you feel paid for?
00:45:01Esme!
00:45:06That's bad, Gigi, mate.
00:45:07You need to let her take a moment.
00:45:08But she's upset.
00:45:11Having your bridges burned is never going to be easy.
00:45:13But she's strong.
00:45:27I think he's better from an older person.
00:45:31But this is your fault, Jess.
00:45:33You were in a fucking movie.
00:45:35She was very giving as an actress.
00:45:38Okay, can one of you please just tell me what's going on?
00:45:43Rachel can't do it.
00:45:44Oh!
00:45:45We forgot Jade posted on Rachel's socials that she was so bitchy she's probably playing the werewolf.
00:45:51Why?
00:45:52Because it was my role!
00:45:54Oh!
00:46:00Wow.
00:46:02What a transformation.
00:46:04Hey, got meself some new threads.
00:46:09It's gonna be a long night.
00:46:24I mean, this is getting ridiculous.
00:46:29Sorry.
00:46:30Caroline!
00:46:31Hi!
00:46:33Hey, Alan.
00:46:35Could I be the most beautiful girl in the world?
00:46:39Caroline, wow.
00:46:41What are you doing here?
00:46:42I mean, I'm glad that you are, but...
00:46:45Why?
00:46:47Seems most men take advantage.
00:46:50Except you, of course.
00:46:52Giggles was a mistake.
00:46:56I'll still do your announcements.
00:46:58If you want me.
00:46:59Really?
00:47:00Caroline, absolutely.
00:47:01That'd be amazing.
00:47:02Yes, yes, thank you.
00:47:03Thank you so much.
00:47:05Wow, slaying it, Mike.
00:47:07Nobody even seen a man on a suit?
00:47:10Ah, she's just getting a bit excited.
00:47:12Our film's showing today.
00:47:14Malicious intent.
00:47:15Gangster comedy.
00:47:16Has malicious intent even got a chance?
00:47:19Well, it's a lower budget than Tugs film, but hopefully we spent the money where it really mattered.
00:47:25We got the secret ingredient.
00:47:27Me?
00:47:28I'm the secret ingredient.
00:47:30Well, look, when Millie was ten, we'd done a short film together called Daddy's Girl.
00:47:37Those clips are a springboard for malicious intent.
00:47:41It's like the story picks up from that point.
00:47:45She was much cuter then.
00:47:47Not such a pain in the arse.
00:47:52Well, the best advice I can give is that you never know who's going to grow up to be famous.
00:47:57So just make yourself available.
00:47:59Oh, don't be a tart.
00:48:01Well, I wish it was Beyonce.
00:48:06I've been looking for you.
00:48:08Found me.
00:48:08Well, I thought maybe you wanted some space.
00:48:11Good choice.
00:48:13Or you could just kill all the girls prettier than me.
00:48:15Or maybe just tug, so.
00:48:20Where are all the good guys, Dad?
00:48:22In the heart or in the head?
00:48:24You think I'm a good guy?
00:48:27Well, when your instinct tells you to do something, you don't do it.
00:48:31So maybe when it tells you not to, that's when you should.
00:48:35Oh.
00:48:37Read the room, Alan. This is the consensual kissing part.
00:48:43Uh...
00:48:44Caroline's back.
00:48:48Um...
00:48:50Your ex that caught with your best friend, Caroline?
00:48:52Yeah.
00:48:54She wants to present the awards.
00:48:57That's good, I guess.
00:48:58Great for you.
00:48:59Well, the whole thing with giggles was a mistake.
00:49:01I mean, I always thought so, but I guess she's realised it too, so...
00:49:05Yeah, no, great.
00:49:06So pleased for you.
00:49:09Are you okay?
00:49:10Yeah, just peachy.
00:49:12Learning lessons all the time.
00:49:15Right, um...
00:49:16Sorry, just one second, thank you.
00:49:20Alright.
00:49:30Ladies and gentlemen, I would be happy to present our next film, Malicious Intent.
00:49:36No, no, no, no.
00:49:38Wait!
00:49:39Wait!
00:49:39Wait!
00:49:40Wait!
00:49:44Um...
00:49:47My...
00:49:47Apologies.
00:49:48There will now be a short interval as I need a word with the festival director.
00:49:55Young man.
00:49:58This is totally irregular.
00:50:01My paperwork should have been signed and she mailed off this morning.
00:50:07Look, I understand.
00:50:08He's...
00:50:09He's just busy.
00:50:10He fobbed me off with that before.
00:50:12Where is your father?
00:50:14He is festival director.
00:50:15Fully understand.
00:50:16Uh, end of the next movie, he'll be here.
00:50:18Yeah, listen, young man.
00:50:20This might seem like a game to you, but it's also my job.
00:50:24And I don't like explaining to my line managers that I can't manage a simple task such as getting a...
00:50:31Signature!
00:50:33Stand on me.
00:50:34I will sort it.
00:50:37It's our big day.
00:50:41Uh...
00:50:41Yeah.
00:50:42It is.
00:51:03I curse them to hell, as her both fought the swell.
00:51:08Our ship danced like a moth in the firelight.
00:51:12Wild horses rode high as the devil passed by, taking souls into Hades by twilight.
00:51:23Five weeks out to sea, we were now forty-three.
00:51:27We buried our comrades each morning.
00:51:31In our own slime, we were lost in the time.
00:51:36Endless night we were darnin'.
00:51:40Oh, I wish I was back home in Derry.
00:51:51Oh, I wish I was...
00:51:54So essentially, it's like a black ops agent.
00:51:57Oh, Caroline, you have to meet our president movie star, Esme Presley.
00:52:02Today everyone's a star, they're all billed as starring or also starring without earning that recognition.
00:52:08Caroline, you're back.
00:52:10From outer space.
00:52:12I notice you cry a lot in your films.
00:52:15Your tear ducts must be very close to your bladder.
00:52:18Has Alan talked you into the presenting?
00:52:20All these best actress nominees and I'm just thinking, shut up and get a salad.
00:52:25Uh, so, um, Caroline thinks that we should just come clean with your adjudicator.
00:52:30Not the best idea.
00:52:32Is that your own thought or do you need a screenwriter?
00:52:37Caroline, we should be friends.
00:52:41Yes, I agree. Best friends.
00:52:46I think that ending needs work.
00:52:48How about less silly questions and a bit more shut the hell up?
00:52:51How did you make her look younger in the film? Was that computer stuff?
00:52:56This is a man who thinks the plural of goose is sheep.
00:53:00I ain't saying anything.
00:53:02So then, your, uh, your style's clearly more gangster than it is horror?
00:53:07Hey, that character played Dudley in your movie?
00:53:10He was awesome.
00:53:14Joy.
00:53:16Alright, ladies and gentlemen, our next film is...
00:53:22Sex.
00:53:24Have fun.
00:53:36Greg F added.
00:53:37York State justice.
00:53:45There is something you're feeling during this journey.
00:53:54try again... Clearly you
00:53:58and I'm enjoyed. The like
00:53:58power of my throat. They're
00:53:59looking for her. It's
00:53:59not dois. bevor we'reorns.
00:54:02There's no escape from what I must do
00:54:06Turn around and bend over
00:54:09I can't wait forever
00:54:14I think it's time to leave
00:54:17I'm young, I'm all dressed up
00:54:19I'm on my way to marry the asexual awakening
00:54:22And there's 290 years separating me from the films of Kevin Smith
00:54:26But that doesn't mean it's true
00:54:31If time don't wait for no one
00:54:37How can I wait for you
00:54:42Tough love
00:54:47It's complete love
00:54:50It's complete love
00:54:52Your hearts will do
00:55:02Didn't fancy sex then?
00:55:04It was beauty that killed the beast
00:55:07Malicious intent should be good competition for Tug
00:55:10It might blindside him
00:55:13Oh, we can hope so
00:55:14But look, I'm probably the most non-competitive person here
00:55:17So I went
00:55:20Secrets and lies
00:55:23Come with me
00:55:28This is bang out of order
00:55:29Have you any idea how much shit I went through to get the day off today?
00:55:33This ain't my day job, you know
00:55:35It's not Alan's fault
00:55:37Well, this does land squarely on Alan's door
00:55:40I was thinking
00:55:41Since no one saw the ending of my film
00:55:44Can we screen it again, maybe?
00:55:48Look at you, all of you
00:55:50No problem is too big
00:55:52We can't fix it if we work together
00:55:55Esme, you're beautiful on the inside
00:55:57But it's important you understand your limitations
00:56:00Alan, what I'm saying is
00:56:03If anyone actually saw the ending of the film
00:56:05Then people would know that my character disguises itself as older
00:56:08I will play your dad
00:56:10And I will sign off this whole festival
00:56:16What?
00:56:17Got range
00:56:21Jim
00:56:23I can't play Gabriel
00:56:25That accent's incredibly tricky
00:56:27If you don't do it
00:56:29Then all of this is over for everyone
00:56:32Hello, son
00:56:33How are you?
00:56:35Oh god, this has disaster written all over it
00:56:39Something is missing
00:56:40Could be range
00:56:43The meanness
00:56:44Yeah, Gabriel is an arsehole
00:56:47Oi, I'm not happy
00:56:49And I don't like it
00:56:50Oh my god
00:56:53Esme
00:56:54Is my foot scrub in there?
00:56:58Yes, it's gotta be brilliant
00:57:02And bring my razor as well, will you?
00:57:05Yeah
00:57:22You've been blowing hot and cold me all day
00:57:25Everything's fine in my world
00:57:28You might want to tell your face that
00:57:31This is a big day for us
00:57:33You bought the award, Tug
00:57:35Hardly meritable
00:57:37I read a book about this once
00:57:38You sure it was a book?
00:57:40You sure it wasn't nothing?
00:57:42This is show business
00:57:43Not care business
00:57:46You're like all the worst parts of a girlfriend
00:57:49And do you not want to meet a producer?
00:57:52And just for that, when the movie comes out, I'm going to get Matt Damon to play you
00:57:56Oh
00:57:58Well maybe I'll get Jade to play you then
00:58:01Jade?
00:58:02Yeah, your new producing partner
00:58:06A little girl on girl action
00:58:10I'm joking
00:58:12I'm joking
00:58:12Unless...
00:58:13Unless you're your friend
00:58:22Geez, I was only joking
00:58:24It's not a joke, I'm feeling lost
00:58:27Hey, I've heard there was a secret code
00:58:30Stop!
00:58:31That Michael played it please the Lord
00:58:33Stop!
00:58:36If I explained it, I think I'd only confuse you
00:58:41Do you know what?
00:58:43I think it's times like this
00:58:44If I wasn't a multi-award winning, talented filmmaker
00:58:48And you were just an ordinary girl
00:58:50Then we wouldn't have these problems
00:58:53On Gods of Shoreditch, I was supposed to be an associate producer
00:58:57But in reality, I was more of a dog's body
00:59:00Seriously, this again?
00:59:02I told you
00:59:03It's whatever it takes to get this shot
00:59:09Look, you can produce the next one in full
00:59:13Yeah, my dad's already on board
00:59:15Take that back, and I'll kill you
00:59:19You're the producer
00:59:22Game face on
00:59:24Hooray for Hollywood
00:59:37Good
00:59:38Didn't you hold the bloody lift?
00:59:39Oh, didn't I?
00:59:43Come on
00:59:45Yes
00:59:49Oh God
01:00:09Are you not gonna change for the paparazzi shorts?
01:00:12It's not really my thing
01:00:13Besides, Gabriel would wear something like this, right?
01:00:16No, I've got a bad feeling about this
01:00:18Listen son, I've got this old routine work there
01:00:20No routine, okay? This isn't an audition
01:00:23Just say hello and then sign the pissing document
01:00:25Where's your wife?
01:00:27I think we should just come clean
01:00:29Hello
01:00:31You must be the adjudicator
01:00:33My son Alan's been telling me all about you
01:00:38Sorry for being a bit busy
01:00:39This film festival malarkey
01:00:41Kept me on me toes
01:00:42Yes, seems to have ramped up a notch
01:00:46With the screening of Gods of Shoreditch
01:00:49One of my personal favourites
01:00:50Um, now that you're here
01:00:54Uh, my paperwork needs a signature
01:00:59Absolutely
01:00:59Happy to
01:01:01Thank you
01:01:02Oh, sorry
01:01:07Forgot who I was there for a second
01:01:11Is that her what?
01:01:14I'll need a final signing off
01:01:17When the winners are announced
01:01:21Your accent seems off
01:01:24Uh, it's...
01:01:27It's posh voice
01:01:30A posh telephone voice
01:01:32Yeah, I should use it all the time really
01:01:35Right
01:01:36Your Honour, may I show you to the next screening?
01:01:43Oh
01:01:44Oh
01:01:46You know, my movies
01:01:47Are inherently amazing
01:01:50It's all about the big screen
01:01:53And it's not easy being an action star
01:01:57Thank you
01:02:02Shouldn't you be up there now that you're here?
01:02:06Yes
01:02:07Uh, absolutely
01:02:09He is such a star when it comes to these things
01:02:17Uh, ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to
01:02:20Introduce to you
01:02:22Gods of Shoreditch
01:02:25And its stars
01:02:26Big round of applause for its stars
01:02:28Esme Presley
01:02:30And Tugs Beatman
01:02:46Good entrance
01:02:48You wanna see the one I'm gonna make
01:02:50When I, uh, win my award?
01:02:54No! Get out!
01:02:57Come on!
01:02:58Crazy filmmakers trying to draw attention to their film
01:03:03I thought they were quite fun
01:03:08You know, they do say I'm the new Robert Rodriguez
01:03:10Except I star in my own movies as well
01:03:13Maybe Robert was smarter
01:03:21You fought well, despite the twisted ankle
01:03:25You will live to fight another day
01:03:27And I assure you, it is not serious
01:03:30I took the liberty of feeling the bone
01:03:33And it is perfectly sound
01:03:36Oh, sir
01:03:37How will I ever thank you?
01:03:40Please
01:03:40Do not think of it
01:03:41It is my honor to serve you
01:03:45Will you not be seated?
01:03:47Pray
01:03:47Excuse me
01:03:49I do not wish to leave a watermark
01:03:54Permit me to call tomorrow afternoon
01:03:57So that I may inquire after you
01:04:04Fight hard, fight for me
01:04:14If I tell you
01:04:14Alan's pitted me some shitty book movie
01:04:18the gold particles the third book in a series that guy the irish connection
01:04:25masaka and fucking chips shit that director is the worst he couldn't even direct traffic
01:04:33you know they should have come to me tug speedman you know i'm right babe
01:04:54fun and happiness and short supply out of the frying pan and into the fire it's always difficult
01:05:01when one person moves on hmm spoke to dad this morning uh he's recovering but no mention of my
01:05:09movie so nice guys don't finish last you're planning something that's going to get me in trouble
01:05:17aren't you oh most definitely
01:05:41uh you best move out of the way and let me be this is not how it works
01:06:19alan
01:06:22thank you everyone for your kind words and praise
01:06:26the buffet has been provided for yours truly fill your guts
01:06:33you really don't have to do this you know they have a meal before their words
01:06:37these ain't for me
01:06:54that went well thanks for that what happened to the group
01:06:58now this is the best fun i've had all year
01:07:06what's this naughty movies or my ransom demands
01:07:14we have a late entry to the film festival
01:07:18and i wanted you to experience it in my full company
01:07:28late entries are highly irregular
01:07:36but this could be a lot of fun
01:07:40well this is it this is where iron mike is staying tonight
01:07:45because uh i did have three iron bathtubs they were all tied together and it was really really
01:07:53really good like
01:07:55i i don't know what you want me to say mike's was the best film
01:07:59i have no patience with best i have no patience with fairness life is not fair love is not fair
01:08:08and as long as we still breathe the air of a free capitalist society business will never be fair
01:08:18sacrifice alan like the kamikaze pilots used to do
01:08:24yeah that's a discomforting stay isn't it hemorrhoids cause discomfort
01:08:27this is open heart surgery
01:08:36fuck the phone alan you said i could produce
01:08:40i will knock you the fuck out right here right now
01:08:45we did the right thing
01:08:48you okay
01:08:51movie stars do not have opinions
01:08:56sorry i know you're his dad but alan worked damn hard throughout this festival
01:09:01and i suppose the bros code is over now you're fucking tugs wife i think i'm done here
01:09:09we're bloody ruins
01:09:22oh alan you know what i'm gonna say yes i know you're ending but i'm not being funny the only
01:09:27thing i care about ending is this festival eyes front god does making movies have to be all this
01:09:33difficult i'm looking forward to this who's doing your presentation hope is a surprise oh me too if she
01:09:40shows up
01:09:40i do love surprises
01:09:57ladies and gentlemen please put your hands together for our wonderful guest speaker caroline doherty
01:10:08so very glad to be here this evening amongst all the wonderful filmmakers and stars
01:10:16to be a filmmaker you have to be psychotic in your desire to do something for the first category best
01:10:24actress actress in a feature film millie ward
01:10:28and malicious attack
01:10:32esme presley in gods of shoreditch
01:10:54so very well done i would like to show my immense gratitude to all of the team involved in gods
01:11:09and for our first best picture nominee we have hey mr dj you didn't think to thank me the
01:11:17man who made it all happen a film about a time in the 90s where djs were gods and gangsters
01:11:23ruled the
01:11:24streets your ego will be stroked enough tonight let's have a look
01:11:34what'd you throw there just uh just some bags i was storing stuff in
01:11:49and the next category is best newcomer nominees
01:11:55lynn chang for opera in the evening garden millie ward for malicious intent
01:12:02and jess bronski from mysterious and the winner is millie ward in malicious intent
01:12:17oh my god i don't even know what to say um thank you so much to the festival
01:12:22thank you so much to everyone that i've met and if you would like to come
01:12:27for drinks afterwards then uh meet me at seven she knows how proud i am of her dunya
01:12:34hey i was nervous and i got one i mean it looks like roughly the right shape i mean
01:12:40it's gonna save me a ton of berries
01:12:43and our next best film nominee is for malicious intent
01:13:05and the next category is best editing nominees we have emmett bronski in mysterious
01:13:14target speedman for gods of shoreditch george cheng for opera in the evening garden
01:13:21and the winner is well this is a vindication considering no one saw the ending and our third
01:13:29best film nominee is gods of shoreditch a story about time traveling gangsters
01:13:36by night one way by day another this shall be the norm until you take true love's first kiss
01:13:43yes and love takes its true form
01:13:50this is no one else
01:13:54in a rather exciting category best actor nominees we have george cheng in opera and evening garden
01:14:04as shraft ward and malicious intent
01:14:09todd speedman in gods of shoreditch
01:14:13and the winner is chug speedman
01:14:21gutted mate proper gutted honestly thought i was in movies chat
01:14:27me too i was the best actor and our fourth best film nominee i didn't know nothing about no fourth
01:14:36nomination is a work of modern day art versus immense need now let's have a look at homelessness
01:14:43and the man by mike creed so there's certain things that you would do well certain things you look
01:14:49for like shopping center pounds on the trials that's a pound like pounds like
01:14:57200 point and we're down to the final award of the evening best overall film of the festival
01:15:05and the winner is hardly a win if you paid for it mike creed
01:15:25well it looks like mike has won best film in town
01:15:28you're fucking
01:15:55you're fucking
01:16:01okay i thought he was pretty convincing you've falsified records there may well be charges
01:16:09what charges no no please all right look i'm sorry this whole thing was my fault don't punish or
01:16:15charge anyone else my dad gabriel guy from the phone had a massive heart attack and he had so much
01:16:22money invested in this festival and he's tug speed man telling the truth technically yes most of it
01:16:29was his money his father's money yes but we went with our hearts and that's why mike won best film
01:16:36i don't judge the films merely here to make sure that the festival is run properly from what you're telling
01:16:42me
01:16:42this has been an absolute farce
01:16:52mr or judicator excuse me for interrupting i have known esme a long time
01:16:59and well if my word has any bearing
01:17:04esme she always speaks from her heart
01:17:07miss warren miss warren miss warren i am a huge fan of your movies
01:17:23and your words do carry significant weight but this is an official matter
01:17:30hmm i fully understand that but if esme says that homeless man is the best film
01:17:42i would not disagree thank you rachel you're welcome
01:18:00so
01:18:13producers um is this jacket okay it feels a bit big
01:18:21sometimes you just gotta take the chances
01:18:24do you regret taking a chance on me
01:18:26who am i to argue with the producer
01:18:32do you miss tug
01:18:35wherever he is and whatever he's doing let's just hope he's not missing us
01:18:51total submission bitches
01:18:55is this gonna hurt true love is pain
01:18:59is
01:18:59is
01:18:59is
01:18:59is
01:18:59is
01:19:27is
01:19:27is
01:19:53Turn over and action.
01:19:57Turn over and action.
01:20:02I'm not playing a street walker.
01:20:05It's a tart with a heart.
01:20:07What? A second rate street walker wearing an outfit like this? I'm first class, one best new come on.
01:20:11Just do it at Harry's Britain please, babe.
01:20:16Idiot.
01:20:19So you know the saying, never work with children or animals.
01:20:24Loves me really.
01:20:25All this day.
01:21:44Some beautiful paths can't be discovered without getting lost.
01:21:50I never did thank you, did I?
01:21:56Emmett!
01:22:01I've got something for you.
01:22:02Oh, God, please do not kidnap me now.
01:22:05You'll like this.
01:22:10Oh, please, he did it to himself when we went back on his word.
01:22:15You're welcome.
01:22:18Why did you just not leave us alone?
01:22:21We told you time and time again, but you still don't listen, do you, sister?
01:22:30Oh, okay.
01:22:32Oh, okay.
01:22:47You're welcome.
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