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The Tonight Show Fallon - Season 13 - Episode 46: Zayn, Nikki Glaser, Ella Stiller
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00:07From Studio 6B and Rockefeller
00:10Center in the heart of New York City
00:11It's for tonight's show starring
00:13Jimmy Fallon
00:15Tonight's show starring Jimmy Fallon
00:17Tonight's show
00:18Jimmy and his guests
00:19Nicky Glaser
00:20Dusty Tyler Ferguson
00:21Alice Miller
00:23Comedian
00:24Isabelle Hagen
00:25And featuring the legendary
00:27Jerry Ruth Nolan
00:292270
00:29Yeah!
00:31And now, here he is
00:34Jimmy Fallon!
00:38Jimmy Fallon!
00:39Hey, hey, hey, hey!
00:40Jimmy Fallon
00:41Johnson
00:42Oh, come on!
00:47Hey, hey, hey
00:48Jimmy Fallon
00:49He is a
00:51winner
00:51Go, Jim!
00:52Thank you!
00:53Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!
00:54How's your life in your life?
01:01Oh, come on.
01:05I love you. Thank you so much.
01:07Have a seat. Enjoy yourself.
01:09Welcome, everybody. Welcome, welcome, welcome
01:11to The Tonight Show.
01:12This is it. You here? This is the show.
01:14It's the one to be at.
01:17Let's get to some news, everybody.
01:19Guys, tomorrow marks the end
01:21of the two-week ceasefire deadline
01:22set by President Trump,
01:24and no progress towards a peace deal with Iran has been made.
01:28Yeah, this is what happens when you spend two weeks
01:30clicking remind me tomorrow.
01:33You could tell time is running out
01:35because today Trump was like,
01:36check GPT, draft a peace deal, very smart, no mistakes.
01:43Yep, with the deadline expiring tomorrow
01:45and no progress made, Trump just announced
01:47that he will once again extend the ceasefire with Iran.
01:51Yeah, it's the most unexpected move he's made
01:53since he did the same exact thing two weeks ago, yeah.
01:58Critics are once again saying Trump always chickens out.
02:00But in his defense, today is Taco Tuesday.
02:06Well...
02:11Yeah, the big story is still Iran,
02:13and everyone's been monitoring the situation.
02:16With the Strait of Hormuz, it can be hard to keep up,
02:18but with the Strait closed, oil prices have been skyrocketing.
02:21And after seven weeks of conflict,
02:24the Strait of Hormuz is officially open.
02:28Oh.
02:30That's amazing.
02:31That's big news.
02:34Anyway, as I was saying...
02:36We are now hearing the Strait of Hormuz is once again closed.
02:41Wow.
02:42That was fast.
02:46Anyway, as I was saying...
02:47J.K., the Strait is open again.
02:50J.K.?
02:53Okay, well, anyway, as I was saying...
02:55Our bad bestie, it's closed again.
02:58What is going on over there?
03:00Anyway, as I was saying...
03:02The Strait is open, but the Hormuz is closed.
03:05What does that even mean?
03:08Anyway, as I was saying...
03:10The Strait is open from 12 to 3,
03:12then closes until 5 to set up for dinner.
03:15That doesn't make sense.
03:25Anyway, as I was saying...
03:27The Strait is still closed,
03:29but my relationship with Donna is now open.
03:32Who's Donna?
03:34Anyway, as I was saying...
03:35President Trump posted a picture of himself as Jesus
03:38walking across the Strait of Hormuz.
03:41Hey, you know what? That's enough.
03:42No more updates.
03:43No more updates. We're good. We're good.
03:45We don't need any more updates.
03:47Guys, I saw today that Trump said
03:49that he would have been more successful
03:50than previous presidents
03:51in conducting wars in Vietnam and Iraq.
03:55Everyone's like,
03:55how about you focus on being successful in this war?
03:59You guys see this?
04:00A new poll shows that Trump's approval rating
04:02has dropped the most among Gen Z.
04:05It's bad.
04:06Right now, he's polling between Sus and DeLulu.
04:12Some more political news.
04:13Tonight, Trump did a live Bible reading
04:15from the Oval Office.
04:18Yeah, Trump took part
04:20in a public reading of the Bible.
04:21He was really into it, actually.
04:23Check out the video he put in.
04:24This is President Trump,
04:26and when it comes to the Bible,
04:27I am an expert.
04:28I know about all the books,
04:30like Job,
04:32Pussams,
04:33Gene Simmons,
04:35Dexter's Laboratory,
04:37101 Dalmatians,
04:39Eczema is Nasty,
04:41Chronicles of Narnia,
04:43Kardashians,
04:45Obladi Oblada,
04:46The Thong Song.
04:47But no matter the book,
04:49I just love reading
04:50the new and old testicles.
04:53All right,
04:53this is a whole thing.
04:54What?
04:55The whole thing's a disaster.
04:57It's a thong song.
04:58What?
05:01Well, listen to this.
05:01I read that this week,
05:02dating app Grindr
05:03is hosting its first ever party
05:05for the White House
05:06Correspondents' Dinner.
05:08Here to discuss this
05:09is White House staffer
05:10Barry Jones.
05:11Welcome to the show, Barry.
05:12Thanks for having me, Jimmy.
05:13Um, so,
05:16what can you tell us
05:17about this party
05:18that Grindr is hosting
05:19at the White House?
05:20Not much, Jimmy.
05:21I've never heard of Grindr
05:23before in my life.
05:26Really?
05:27Stop interrogating me.
05:30I'm not, uh,
05:31it's just a pretty
05:32well-known app,
05:32that's all.
05:33Yeah, apparently it's for men
05:35to romantically connect
05:37with other men.
05:39You can see who's nearby
05:40and you can meet up with them
05:42at a restaurant or bar
05:44or a White House bathroom.
05:47I guess it's the first
05:49I'm hearing about it.
05:50It seems you're familiar
05:52enough with it.
05:53And it seems like
05:54you're accusing me.
05:56I'm not accusing you
05:57of anything, Barry.
05:58Good.
05:59Because I'm a straight,
06:00non-curious White House staffer
06:03who does not use Grindr.
06:08I think your phone
06:09is going off.
06:11Sorry about that.
06:12I forgot to silence it.
06:13And no, that was not
06:15the Grindr new message
06:16notification sound.
06:18I didn't say it was.
06:20Barry, can we start over?
06:21I think we got off
06:22on the wrong foot.
06:24Fine.
06:26Hi.
06:29Hi.
06:32How are you?
06:35Good.
06:37Good.
06:39You want to meet
06:40in the White House bathroom?
06:41No, Barry, no, I don't.
06:43We have to move on.
06:44White House staffer
06:45Barry Jones, everyone.
06:46I do not use Grindr.
06:49Now, turn his mic off.
06:57Do you guys see this?
06:59Red Lobster is bringing back
07:00their endless shrimp promotion
07:01for the first time
07:02since it helped
07:05just this side of the audience.
07:07That's weird.
07:08We hate shrimp.
07:10Yeah.
07:11We divide our audience
07:12into shrimp lovers
07:13and shrimp haters.
07:16Red Lobster is bringing back
07:17their endless shrimp promotion.
07:19Don't clap.
07:20For the first time
07:23since it helped drive them
07:24towards bankruptcy.
07:27Now you're happy you clap?
07:31So you're bringing it back.
07:33Isn't that wild?
07:34They actually released
07:34a new commercial about it.
07:35Check it out.
07:36Endless shrimp is banned.
07:37And we're bankrupt.
07:39Damn it.
07:39Red Lobster.
07:40Oops.
07:41We did it again.
07:42Oops.
07:45Hey, get this.
07:45A Carnival Cruise passenger
07:47just won a $300,000 lawsuit
07:49for claiming that
07:50the shift's staff
07:50served her 14 tequila shots
07:53in the span of eight hours.
07:55Carnival was like,
07:56how else are we going
07:57to kill the Norovir?
07:59And finally,
08:00I heard about a man
08:01in California
08:01who was arrested
08:02after he allegedly
08:03purchased Lego sets
08:04from Target
08:05and then returned the boxes
08:06with pasta inside.
08:10Meanwhile,
08:10someone eating a bowl
08:11of Legos at Olive Garden
08:12was like,
08:12hey, this tastes
08:13better than usual.
08:14Well, we have a great show.
08:15Give it up
08:15for The Roots, everybody.
08:18Yes, man.
08:19What if you were just, yes?
08:20Come on, make yourself the way.
08:22I beat a 9-1-11
08:23But not at the
08:24Meccafest address
08:25the top section,
08:26you're a huge fatigue.
08:29Well, hey, guys.
08:30We got some good news today.
08:31We won six Webby awards.
08:33Whoa!
08:34Six!
08:35Webby!
08:38Six Webby's.
08:39That's the most
08:40we've ever won.
08:41Wow.
08:41Since we've been doing this,
08:42how cool is that?
08:43I want to thank everyone
08:44at the Webby's.
08:45I want to thank everyone
08:46who voted for us,
08:47everyone who worked
08:48so hard here at the show.
08:50And, of course,
08:50I want to thank
08:51our amazing digital team.
08:52This is a real honor.
08:53Six Webby.
08:55Yes!
08:56Wow!
08:56That's awesome!
08:59It's a real honor.
09:01Speaking of real honor,
09:02this is true.
09:03This just happened.
09:05What?
09:05I'm on the cover
09:06of this month's
09:07Mad Magazine.
09:08Whoa!
09:17Is that unbelievable?
09:18That's fantastic.
09:20It's a special
09:21late-night issue.
09:23There's all the hosts here.
09:24If you can see all the hosts
09:25in there,
09:25there's Letterman
09:26sleeping in the sleeping bag.
09:29And Alfred E. Newman's there
09:30and Kimmel and Seth
09:32and everybody.
09:33If you're a comedian,
09:34this is like being
09:35on the cover of Rolling Stone.
09:37Yeah.
09:38Or the Sports Illustrated
09:39swimsuit issue,
09:40which I'm still holding out for.
09:42Yeah, still.
09:43But I used to read this
09:44all the time as a kid,
09:45and you learn so much
09:46about comedy
09:47and humor and writing.
09:48It's always been so funny.
09:49And now to be in it
09:50and to be on the cover
09:52with Alfred E. Newman
09:53is just so cool.
09:54It's out now,
09:55so go pick it up
09:57at your local comic book store.
09:59I love Mad Magazine.
10:01Yeah.
10:03I mean, I still,
10:04I have my old ones
10:04from when I was in high school.
10:05I mean, I still,
10:06I collected them.
10:07I saved them.
10:08It's an honor.
10:09And they have the folding.
10:10The folding still?
10:11Yeah.
10:12It's everything.
10:12They got all the jokes.
10:13I'm so excited.
10:13Come on.
10:14Come on.
10:14Give them time.
10:15Yeah, man.
10:19What an honor.
10:21Guys, have you ever seen
10:22a photo in the news
10:23and think that headline
10:24could be better?
10:25It's time for a bit
10:26called News and Improve.
10:27Here we go.
10:35You ever have that
10:36happen to you, Higgins?
10:37Yeah, always.
10:38I'm sitting there,
10:39I'm reading the paper,
10:39I look at a picture,
10:40go, nah,
10:41that could be better.
10:42You think the headline,
10:44you say to yourself,
10:45and what do you have,
10:45a digital copy,
10:46I'm assuming?
10:47Yeah, no,
10:47I get,
10:48my eyes aren't so good
10:49because I'm older,
10:50I get a giant print version.
10:51Oh, yeah,
10:52I know that printer company,
10:53they keep them in business.
10:54They print out newspapers
10:55for you in giant print
10:57so that you can enjoy
10:59reading the headlines
11:00of today.
11:01But every time
11:01I look at them,
11:02I go,
11:03eh,
11:03could be better.
11:05Just by judging the photo,
11:06is that what you're saying?
11:07I look at the photo.
11:08Of course.
11:08And then I look
11:09at the print beneath it
11:10and I go...
11:11Or above it.
11:11Or above it.
11:12Above it, not so much.
11:13Oh, okay.
11:14You know, the eyes.
11:15Yeah, your eyes.
11:15I go below
11:16and I'll go,
11:17mm, not so good.
11:19Then I'll think of a humorous,
11:20I'll go,
11:20I wish I could think
11:22a humorous way
11:23to make this headline better,
11:25but there's no,
11:25what can I do?
11:27Let me show you something
11:29that we're working on.
11:30What?
11:30Eh, I think you're gonna like it.
11:32What are you talking about?
11:33Well, look at this first photo.
11:35Okay, let me take a gander.
11:36Oh, I don't like that.
11:37Originally was French Minister
11:39Discusses Conflict Solutions.
11:41The headline could definitely
11:42be improved.
11:43Like what?
11:44Well, if you only looked
11:44at the photo,
11:45the headline could have been,
11:46uh-oh, date using air quotes
11:47to describe science.
11:50One of my ics.
11:52One of my ics.
11:55Look at this next headline.
11:56Let me see.
11:57Scottish leaders speak
11:58ahead of election.
11:59Okay.
11:59That's the headline?
12:00That could be better.
12:01How about this one?
12:02Man unsure how his reflection
12:04has glass...
12:09Is that possible?
12:10That's vampire glass.
12:11That's unbelievable.
12:13This next headline was,
12:14Italian Prime Minister Maloney
12:16prepares for debate.
12:18Headline could have been,
12:19man sneezes directly
12:20into co-worker's ear on accident.
12:22He didn't notice he was there.
12:24He just...
12:26Up next, this headline says,
12:28India host president of South Korea.
12:30The headline could have been,
12:31that feeling when you and Bae
12:32agreed to go halfsies
12:33on the marijuana plant.
12:38Wow.
12:39Bae, half-reason,
12:40marijuana plant.
12:41Wow.
12:42A trifecta.
12:43This next headline was,
12:45Pope Leo addresses journalists.
12:46The headline could have been,
12:48man absolutely crushes
12:49choosing Texas at karaoke.
12:51He's from Texas,
12:52I can tell by the way.
12:57The next headline was,
12:58Alpaca Society National Show Begins.
13:01Oh.
13:01Headline could have been,
13:02family hasn't seen mom this happy
13:03since the divorce.
13:07Uh-oh.
13:08That's Randy.
13:10This next headline was,
13:11King Charles visits art venue.
13:13Headline could have been,
13:14DJ asked,
13:15are y'all ready for some harpsichord?
13:18Ha-ha-P-Sp pad?
13:25Was that the auto harp?
13:27Yeah, it's lots of harpsichord,
13:28yeah.
13:29Yeah.
13:29Uh, DJ,
13:30are y'all ready for some harpsichord?
13:33Ha-ha-p-P-Sp pad?
13:36Ha-p-Sc pad?
13:36Bring, bring, bring, bring, bring, bring, bring, bring, bring,
13:39bring, bring, bring, bring, bring, bring, bring.
13:42You all ready for some harpsichord?
13:44Yeah!
13:47Thank you. That's a good club.
13:48Yeah.
13:50The shrimp lovers loved it.
13:52Next headline was,
13:53Madrid missed his chance to score.
13:56Headline could have been drunk dad on hour three
13:57of trying to get out of the hammock.
14:00Ah!
14:03I'll just live here.
14:07Finally, this headline was
14:11Headline could have been
14:17That's all the time we have for News and Improved.
14:19Stick around. We'll be right back with Nikki Glaser!
14:39Our first guest is a hilarious comedian
14:42whose new stand-up special,
14:44Nikki Glaser, Good Girl,
14:45premieres this Friday on Hulu.
14:47Please welcome Nikki Glaser.
15:00Come on! That's what I'm talking about.
15:02This is fantastic. Come on.
15:05Thank you, Glaser.
15:07That's right.
15:12They love you. We love you.
15:14Welcome back.
15:15I am so glad to be here.
15:16I have to say, my voice is a little hoarse.
15:19I lost my voice screaming at Coachella.
15:22That's the name of my housekeeper.
15:25Oh, my God.
15:26She stole my watch that I was wearing.
15:28She was screaming at Coachella.
15:30Do you ever get hoarse?
15:32You kind of feel sexy.
15:33I'm kind of like, oh, it's a little bit like Dua Lipa.
15:35Yeah.
15:36Yeah, I do like it.
15:37My Dua Lipas might fall out of the stress, too, by the way.
15:40I want to say congratulations on a lot of things
15:43because we always love it when you come here.
15:44But since the last time you've been on this show,
15:47your stand-up tour, the Alive and Unwell tour,
15:49was one of the top ten highest-grossing comedy tours
15:52of 2025.
15:54Oh, my God. Thank you.
15:54Nikki Glaser.
15:56Yeah.
15:57You were also named one of Time Magazine's
16:00100 Most Influential People for the second year.
16:03Yes.
16:06You also hosted Saturday Night Live for the first time.
16:09Yes.
16:09You were fantastic on there, by the way.
16:11Thank you. It was so fun.
16:12Best week of my life.
16:13You also hosted the Golden Globes for the second time,
16:16and it was announced that you're host again for a third time.
16:18Go, Nikki Glaser.
16:22That's what I'm talking about.
16:24Thanks.
16:24You are great at that job.
16:28You've done it.
16:28I mean, it's so hard.
16:31It's a tough job.
16:31Yeah.
16:32You nailed it.
16:33It's, you know, so much of it, I have to say,
16:36depends on the crowd.
16:38Like, the celebrities being able to laugh at themselves.
16:40And I work really hard to make sure the jokes are good
16:43and the audience at home, like, likes how far I'm going,
16:46but that I don't go too far.
16:47I don't ruin anyone's night.
16:48But there's some jokes that you just don't know
16:49until you tell them, like, how they're going to land.
16:52So after I do it, I always send flowers to everyone
16:54that I made fun of that, like, was a good sport about it,
16:57which was everyone, just to say thank you,
16:59because it is a part of why I'm successful at it.
17:01And the only person who sent something back to me,
17:04I did a joke about Leonardo DiCaprio,
17:06which I was really struggling with because I was like,
17:09I just don't want to make the joke
17:10about how he has young girlfriends.
17:11It's been done so many times.
17:13I mean, it's been, that joke's been going on longer
17:14than, you know, his current girlfriend's been alive.
17:17You know, like, it's truly been around forever.
17:20And I'm like, I don't want to do it.
17:22But then it was like, there was nothing else to say about him.
17:24And then I was like, well, that's kind of funny.
17:26So I was like, let's try to find, like,
17:29this guy doesn't reveal anything about himself.
17:30Let's find something he's revealed.
17:32And so me and my writing team found a Teen Beat article
17:35from 1991 where he revealed that, I was like,
17:37Leo, we don't know anything about you.
17:39You know, the only thing we know about you
17:40is from a Teen Beat article in 1991
17:41where he told us your favorite food
17:43is pasta, pasta, and more pasta.
17:45And it really was real.
17:47And then he sent me three baskets of pasta as a thank you.
17:52He sent me pasta, pasta.
17:53So funny.
17:53That's a good dude.
17:55So good.
17:56That's funny.
17:56And part of me was, part of me was like,
17:59does Leo want to smash?
18:01Like, I was like, all right.
18:02Backstage you were telling me
18:03that you have an obsession with the new food.
18:05Oh, I can't stop eating Uncrustables.
18:09It's my favorite food.
18:11Has anyone let this food into their heart in a real way?
18:14What?
18:15Have you tried them yet?
18:16No.
18:16Oh, my God.
18:18Because I always, like, looked at them like,
18:19that would be good.
18:20But then I started eating them.
18:21I have, like, four a day.
18:23I started on them because I was babysitting my nephew
18:25and he went to sleep and I took an edible.
18:27And so I got into them.
18:28And I realized, like, they're marketing for little kids,
18:32but they're really for high adults is what they're for.
18:35And they are so good.
18:37They, um, and I buy them in bulk
18:39because I eat, like, four to six a day.
18:41And so it is awkward, like, going to Target with all the,
18:44and there's always the conversation of, like,
18:45oh, got a lot of kids at home?
18:47And I'm like, no, I'm a pedophile.
18:48You know, this is my bait.
18:50I don't know what to say.
18:51It's just an awkward conversation.
18:53But they are so, to me, you have to try them.
18:55They're so good.
18:56The bread is, like, so soft.
18:58And it's, like, it is funny because they're, like,
19:00it's an easy pita bread and jelly sandwich.
19:02It's, like, oh, yeah, like, because, you know,
19:04sometimes you just don't like to cook.
19:06And it's, like, it's because it's the easiest food
19:08made it even easier.
19:09It's, like, a bidet that, like, poops for you.
19:12Like, it's, like, it doesn't need to be easier
19:14than pita bread and jelly, but they cut off the crust.
19:16The bread is so soft.
19:18It's, like, temper foam material, I think.
19:20It's, it's, it really is the consistency.
19:22I feel like, like, when you ever see, like,
19:25a baby's chunky arm and you're, like,
19:26I just want to bite it.
19:27Yes.
19:28And you're, like, you can now.
19:30It's so good.
19:31I have them on me all the time.
19:33I, even tonight, I have them right now.
19:36I, um...
19:39I wear them as shapewear now.
19:42They literally work.
19:43Look how deflated I am now.
19:45Now it's all gone.
19:46Wow.
19:46So this one's for you.
19:47Thank you so much.
19:48This is the way you should have it.
19:50Moist and warm.
19:53I am, I am honored.
19:55I am honored.
19:57Thank you so much.
19:58It literally, so I, I, I want you to get in on that.
20:02It's very warm.
20:03Isn't it?
20:04Yeah.
20:06It's very warm.
20:08These are the strawberry.
20:09Yeah.
20:09They're almost, they're almost toasted.
20:13How did you do that?
20:14Wow.
20:15Um...
20:15If you want grape, I have those in my bag.
20:16I know.
20:17I know.
20:18But I need that batting.
20:19I'm pumped.
20:19That's my PBL.
20:20I'm full.
20:21I want to talk about...
20:22Here, I have a nap.
20:24That's what I did.
20:24I want to talk about your very funny new stand-up special.
20:26Yeah.
20:27Nikki Glaser, Good Girl.
20:28Good Girl.
20:29Yeah.
20:29Good Girl.
20:30It's on Hulu.
20:30Yep.
20:31Premieres this Friday on Hulu.
20:32Yes, it does.
20:33It's, like, my most personal thoughts.
20:35It's, um, it's really out there.
20:37I, I almost don't want people to see it
20:38because it's so vulnerable.
20:39So if that...
20:40But I, I think you should
20:41because I worked really hard on it.
20:43It's really funny.
20:44That's how we got to know you.
20:44It's gorgeous.
20:45It's really well done.
20:45You're a great stand-up meeting.
20:46Thank you so much.
20:47That's how we got to know you.
20:48You're amazing.
20:49Good Girl.
20:49Yeah, thank you, Jamie.
20:50Good Girl.
20:51On Hulu, I want to, I want to show a clip.
20:53Here's Nikki Glaser in Good Girl.
20:55Take a look.
20:56I'm going to get a facelift in a couple years.
20:59And thank you for cheering that on.
21:00Most people are like, don't, don't do it.
21:04I don't know whether to be insulted
21:05by you cheering it on or not,
21:07but I appreciate that.
21:08What I don't want when I get a facelift
21:10is anyone being like,
21:11that's so sad she did that.
21:13Why did she do that?
21:14And the answer is,
21:15it's because it's going to lead
21:16to a better life for me.
21:17I'm on TV a lot.
21:18I'm going to look amazing.
21:19I'm going to get better roles.
21:20I'm going to get paid more for those roles.
21:22I'm going to get fire emojis
21:23from Kristen Cavallari.
21:25Like, it's...
21:27Do you know how good it feels
21:29to have Bowen Yang write diva
21:31with 19 A's underneath a picture of you?
21:34Looks like he just fell asleep
21:36on the keyboard
21:36because I was so slay.
21:38Come on.
21:39You are so slay.
21:41Nikki Glaser, everybody.
21:43Her stand-up special,
21:44Good Girl,
21:45premieres this Friday on Hulu.
21:47Jesse Tyler Ferguson joins us
21:49after the break.
21:49Stick around.
21:50You are unsure too much.
21:52Be true.
21:54Guaranteed to be like having a bull.
21:59Try it again.
22:00I got a purpose in 2-1-5, man.
22:04Our next guest is a Tony-winning actor
22:06who stars as Truman Capote
22:08in the play True at House of the Redeemer
22:11here in New York City
22:12through May 10th.
22:14Please welcome Jesse Tyler Ferguson!
22:17True Capote!
22:34Hey, welcome back.
22:35Hi.
22:36I love having you here.
22:37Love being here.
22:37Last time we talked on the show,
22:39you were excited about
22:40you were having a joint birthday party.
22:42Oh, gosh.
22:43Yeah, I turned 50 this year.
22:44Yeah, happy birthday.
22:45Yeah, let's applaud.
22:46Let's applaud for that.
22:47He made it.
22:48He made it that far.
22:49My husband is 10 years younger
22:51and turned 40,
22:52and we did a big 30-40 birthday
22:54you know, 10 years ago,
22:56and it was like a rager.
22:57Yeah.
22:58And so this year,
22:59we had a party.
23:00We have two kids now,
23:01and our party started at 3 p.m.
23:04That's right.
23:05And it ended at like 7.
23:06That sounds like...
23:07And people were kind of
23:07making fun of us for doing that,
23:09but I was like...
23:10But at the end,
23:10they're like,
23:11this was amazing.
23:13But we didn't have any kids at the party
23:15except for our kids,
23:16and at one point,
23:18my younger son, Sullivan,
23:20sort of fell off this stool,
23:22and the closest person next to him,
23:24I wasn't near him.
23:25It's fine.
23:26There was lots of people near him.
23:27But the closest person next to him
23:29was Joshua Jackson.
23:30And so Joshua Jackson
23:32picks him up
23:33and sort of coddles him,
23:34and then my son pees on him.
23:38There was that.
23:39So I was like,
23:39I'm so sorry.
23:40And he was like,
23:40well, I definitely feel like
23:41I've been initiated into your family.
23:43But then I was noticing
23:44women and gay men,
23:45like, I'm falling too.
23:48Joshua Jackson.
23:49Oh, oh my.
23:50Joshua.
23:52The vapors, the vapors.
23:53Exactly.
23:53I was like,
23:54oh, everyone needs to calm down.
23:56Yeah.
23:56I saw that you recently
23:57took your kids to go see Spelling Bee.
23:59I did, yeah.
24:00That's how I think
24:00the first time I saw you
24:01in that play,
24:02you originated.
24:03Yeah, 20 years ago.
24:04Yeah, so there's a revival now,
24:05and I was like,
24:07well, this would be cool
24:07to take my kids to the show
24:08that I originated,
24:09you know, 20 years ago
24:10in New York.
24:11And I wanted to make
24:12a special night out for them,
24:13and like, you know,
24:14I wanted to take them
24:14to like a nice dinner,
24:15but then I realized
24:16like, that's just for me.
24:17So I took them to McDonald's
24:19on 51st and 8th,
24:21and they were like stoked.
24:22Yeah.
24:23Yeah.
24:23But like, such a rookie mistake
24:25for me,
24:26because like,
24:26Mitchell from Modern Family
24:27walks into like,
24:28the most touristy modern family,
24:30I've met McDonald's ever.
24:32Everyone's pointing.
24:32Everyone's pointing.
24:33I'm like signing autographs,
24:35you know,
24:35as I'm just trying
24:35to get Happy Meals.
24:36And the guy next to us,
24:39he actually recognizes me
24:40from Spelling Bee.
24:42And so he tells my kids,
24:43he's like,
24:43you know,
24:43your dad,
24:45your papa,
24:45like was one
24:46of the originators
24:47of the first production
24:48of Spelling Bee.
24:49So my kids,
24:50you know,
24:51took that information
24:52into the theater with them,
24:53and they were telling
24:53all the people around us
24:54that I created the show.
24:58My papa created this,
25:00you know,
25:00just to say,
25:01there was a laugh,
25:02like my papa wrote that.
25:03Aw.
25:03It was very sweet,
25:04yeah.
25:05Let's talk about this play.
25:06This is a,
25:07True is the name of the play.
25:09And where is it at again?
25:11It's at this,
25:12it's on the Upper East Side
25:13on 95th and Park Avenue.
25:14It's an old
25:16turn-of-the-century
25:17Gilded Age mansion.
25:18And I perform it
25:19in the library there.
25:20It's for 99 people a night.
25:22And I play Truman Capote.
25:23You walk in,
25:24and it's my living room.
25:25It's Truman Capote's living room.
25:25So I interact
25:26with the audience,
25:28and it's really very special
25:30and very cool.
25:30This is where y'all go,
25:31ooh.
25:32Ah, yes.
25:33Look at that.
25:34Oh.
25:35Oh.
25:37Ooh.
25:38See how close
25:39these audiences are?
25:39Although I love,
25:40it's this guy,
25:42when we shot these photos,
25:44this guy is falling asleep
25:45in, like, all the pictures.
25:46No, no.
25:48Yeah.
25:48Does that bum you out?
25:49I mean, do you get to see,
25:50normally on theater,
25:51on stage, you see...
25:52You don't see anyone.
25:53Yeah, they're having
25:54their own experience in the dark,
25:55but here I see everything.
25:56Like, if you check your watch,
25:57I see it.
25:58There was a woman,
25:59there was a woman
26:00who spilled her drink
26:01the other day,
26:02and she was, like,
26:03mopping it up,
26:03and she was pulling focus.
26:05You know, it's my show.
26:05Hello.
26:06And everyone was, like,
26:06watching this woman,
26:08like, mop up her wine,
26:09and as Truman Capote,
26:10I had to go over
26:11and be like,
26:11I have housekeeping
26:13coming in later.
26:14Don't worry about it.
26:15My dear, it's fine.
26:16There's so much liquor
26:17on this rug.
26:18Don't worry.
26:19Oh, my gosh.
26:20Yeah, it's like,
26:21stop her from...
26:21But, like,
26:22as the character, yeah.
26:23And you dive right in
26:25and become Truman Capote.
26:26It's a great impression.
26:27I mean, I watched a lot of
26:29videos of him,
26:30and I do have, like,
26:31little exercises.
26:32You know, I do Shakespeare
26:33as Truman Capote sometimes,
26:35just because, you know,
26:37that's the type of guy I am.
26:39Fun for you, yeah.
26:40Yeah.
26:40So, yeah, it's fun.
26:41And as you're doing
26:42Truman Capote,
26:43do you see more of Truman Capote
26:45popping up in your life,
26:46like, randomly?
26:47You know, I'm trying
26:48to get away from him
26:49because he's, like,
26:50he's everywhere right now,
26:51and I'm, like,
26:52I'm just, I'm kind of tired
26:53of him, to be honest.
26:54I love him,
26:55but I'm also, like,
26:56ah, I've had a long day
26:57of Truman Capote.
26:57So I went home the other day
26:58and I turned on
26:59RuPaul's Drag Race,
27:00and a drag queen,
27:01a drag queen was doing
27:02Truman Capote.
27:03No way!
27:04You're joking!
27:05Jane Doan,
27:05who does a brilliant
27:06Truman Capote, by the way.
27:07But, yeah, I was, like,
27:08God damn it!
27:10I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah,
27:12but it's everywhere.
27:13Yeah, but I love that,
27:13I love that Truman Capote
27:14is part of pop culture,
27:16and, like,
27:16people are being reminded.
27:17He's a genius.
27:18Was a genius.
27:19He's no longer with us.
27:19But he is.
27:20Yeah, but, yeah,
27:21he was a genius.
27:21But what an experience
27:22this is for 99 people
27:24to sit in a room
27:25and you just,
27:26do you just enter
27:27as Truman Capote?
27:27I just enter
27:28as Truman Capote
27:28and for 90 minutes
27:29you're just sitting
27:30in the space
27:30with me as Truman Capote
27:32and it's really,
27:32it's quite something.
27:33It's a beautiful play.
27:35Yeah, I'm loving it.
27:36It just got extended, right?
27:37It just got extended.
27:38I just got nominated
27:39for a drama league.
27:40What are you talking about?
27:42Come on!
27:43What are you talking about?
27:45Congratulations!
27:47What am I doing?
27:48What am I doing?
27:48Why am I doing this?
27:49You're doing something cool.
27:49Why am I doing this?
27:50Whatever you're doing,
27:50you're doing very cool.
27:51Well, no, you're very, very cool.
27:53Yes, no, it's a little,
27:55it's a joy to do
27:57and I'm very excited.
27:58People are loving it, so.
27:59Congratulations on
27:59all the great reviews.
28:00Thanks for coming on the show.
28:02Jesse Tyler Ferguson,
28:03True is playing
28:04at House of the Redeemer
28:06in New York City
28:07through May 10th.
28:09More Tonight Show
28:10after the break.
28:10Stick around.
28:26Our next guest is a talented actress
28:29who you can see
28:30in the third and final season
28:31of the series
28:32The Comeback.
28:33New episodes stream
28:34every Sunday
28:35at 10.30 p.m.
28:37on HBO.
28:38Please welcome
28:38Ella Stiller.
28:57Welcome to the show.
28:58Nice to meet you.
28:59It's so nice to meet you.
29:00You grew up
29:02in New York City.
29:03Of course, yes.
29:04What's that like
29:04as a kid growing up
29:05in New York City?
29:06It's the greatest
29:07way to grow up.
29:08I'm a true New Yorker
29:10and I'm proud of that.
29:12Yeah.
29:12Yeah, but you have,
29:13yes, yes.
29:15For life, for life.
29:17But you have some,
29:18you know,
29:19interesting experiences
29:20as a kid
29:21that maybe not
29:22other people do.
29:23Like, for example,
29:23I went to a,
29:24I went to a school
29:26where we didn't have walls.
29:28No walls.
29:29No walls.
29:30Once you got
29:30into the school.
29:31Yeah, you go in
29:32and there's, like,
29:33some bookshelves
29:35and there's some,
29:36a class going on
29:37over here.
29:39Class going on
29:39over here.
29:40Call the teachers
29:41by their first name.
29:42Wow.
29:43Yeah.
29:43Do you sit in chairs?
29:44You do sit in chairs.
29:45Okay, yeah, okay,
29:46good, yeah.
29:46Yes, yes.
29:47That's normal.
29:48And is it,
29:49is it an actor's school?
29:51It is not an actor's school.
29:53Like, do you imagine walls?
29:54No, yeah, exactly.
29:55You have to imagine.
29:56Doors, space work.
29:57You have to do
29:58some real imagination work.
29:59Ellie, can you close
30:00the window, please?
30:02Mime school?
30:03It's definitely not
30:04mime school.
30:05Not mime school, wow.
30:06I did do that, though.
30:07Kind of, yeah.
30:08Well, I didn't do mime school,
30:09but I did drama school.
30:11Yes, you did.
30:11Well, you went to Juilliard.
30:12I did.
30:13Come on, not too shabby.
30:14Come on, bud.
30:16Come on.
30:17Not too shabby.
30:19What's that like, Juilliard?
30:21Juilliard's so intense.
30:22It's so crazy.
30:23It sounds like a dream.
30:24It's bizarre.
30:25It's bizarre, yeah.
30:26What do they make you do?
30:27Because that is a full-on acting school.
30:29Oh, you do so, so many different things.
30:32I mean, I feel like everyone knows about,
30:33you know, you do your mask class.
30:37Mask?
30:37Mask work.
30:38Masks, yes.
30:39Wearing them?
30:40You're wearing them, yes.
30:41Wearing them, embodying them.
30:43You have to sort of look at them
30:44and learn who it is.
30:46They tell you.
30:47The mask tells you.
30:48It teaches you who it is.
30:50Then you wear it,
30:51and then you are the mask.
30:52And then there's, of course, the animal work.
30:54But we also, we would put our characters
30:57in a ring of fire
31:02and watch the character that we just played burn.
31:07To say goodbye, of course.
31:09Wow.
31:10To let go of that.
31:11Wow, that's intense.
31:12Yeah, you imagine it, of course.
31:13It's not in real life.
31:14It's all in your mind.
31:18This is more mime school stuff?
31:20You're just like, putting out the fire
31:23with an extinguisher.
31:24Good work, Elle.
31:25You did great.
31:26Yeah, yeah, yeah.
31:27That's why.
31:27But you must learn so many things there
31:29that you put on your resume.
31:30You're like, dude, I can burn my character.
31:32Yeah.
31:33I mean, I can walk on stilts.
31:35They do stilt work?
31:36Yeah, because apparently,
31:37if you can't walk on stilts,
31:38you're not a real actor.
31:41That's just the truth.
31:44You're making it happen.
31:45Your schools did well.
31:47They taught you all.
31:48Let's talk about the comeback
31:50because, gosh, it's funny.
31:51And you star alongside Lisa Kudrow,
31:53who's just hilarious.
31:54She's the greatest.
31:55She really is, right?
31:56She's the greatest.
31:57She's like, you know,
31:58she's the real deal.
31:59I love her.
32:00You filmed on the Warner Brothers lot
32:02and here are you sitting
32:03in front of the Friends Fountain.
32:05Come on.
32:07Yeah.
32:08Do you get nervous when you go on?
32:11Because they've been doing the show for,
32:13when did they start Comeback?
32:14It was probably...
32:152005.
32:1620 years ago.
32:17Yeah, and so it's...
32:18But you're the newcomer.
32:19Really walking into this family
32:21who have known each other for so long
32:23and have such history
32:24and that's really intimidating
32:25and really scary.
32:26And all I wanted was to just,
32:28you know,
32:29sort of seamlessly integrate
32:30into this beautiful world
32:33that they've built.
32:33I came on as a fan of the show.
32:35Like, I started work
32:36and I was like,
32:37oh my God,
32:37I'm talking to Valerie Cherish right now.
32:39This is the craziest thing in the world.
32:40Because also,
32:41Lisa will start just doing improv
32:43to just get into it
32:44and that's a scary thing.
32:46Yeah.
32:46But it was so fun
32:48and so amazing
32:49and everyone,
32:49they're like my family now.
32:50I love them.
32:51Yeah, you work so well together.
32:51I love them, love them, love them.
32:53What do we say
32:53about what's going on in season three?
32:55Well, season three,
32:56so we're sort of
32:57in the midst of it right now
32:58and Valerie has signed on
33:00to do the first ever
33:02AI written sitcom.
33:04Ooh.
33:05Yes.
33:06And I play her social media manager,
33:09Patience.
33:09Patience, yeah.
33:10Great name.
33:11Yes.
33:12Patience may be a hypochondriac
33:14at times.
33:15Maybe.
33:16But she always shows up to work.
33:18Always.
33:18Kind of, yeah.
33:19She does show up, yeah.
33:20Yes.
33:20It's very, very good,
33:22very funny.
33:22I want to show everyone a clip.
33:23Here's Ella Stiller
33:24in The Comeback.
33:25Take a look.
33:27Patience is anyone,
33:28anyone standing up for me.
33:30It's a lot of TV writers
33:31on social media
33:32that each only have
33:33like 12 followers.
33:34Okay, yeah.
33:35Yeah, but it's catching fire.
33:36Everybody's picking this up.
33:38There's nobody in TV.
33:40Okay.
33:40Is Nunet saying anything
33:42or Comspot or any of them?
33:43I've seen nothing.
33:44You know what, Billy?
33:45Call your guy at Nunet,
33:47the one you're sleeping with.
33:48I'm not calling him.
33:49He screamed at me
33:50at the GLAAD Awards.
33:51Okay, well, God forbid
33:52you should be embarrassed
33:53when the entire world
33:54is tearing me apart.
33:56No, it's just Hollywood.
33:57Oh, just Hollywood?
33:58Okay, yeah, that's good.
34:00Just where I live and work.
34:02Okay, it's an end-of-day dump,
34:04which is good.
34:04By this time tomorrow,
34:05the story will be dead.
34:06Okay, yeah, it'll be dead.
34:08Like my career.
34:10Yeah, come on.
34:11Ella Stiller, everybody!
34:14New episodes of The Comeback
34:16airs Sundays at 10.30 p.m.
34:18on HBO.
34:19We'll be right back
34:20with more Tonight Show, everybody.
34:21Come on back.
34:22I was feeling a fest
34:24when I was in a good church
34:25before.
34:25They feel uncomfortable
34:26when I'm best in it.
34:27They tested me,
34:28but now they in the clinic.
34:31I think you can draw a bag
34:33or call a mind
34:33more faster than your plan.
34:37Our next guest
34:38has her comedy special,
34:39Isabel Hagen,
34:40at the Bitter End,
34:41available on YouTube.
34:43Please welcome
34:44the very funny
34:44Isabel Hagen.
34:53Thank you so much.
34:56It's great to be here.
34:57I was walking
34:58on the street earlier
34:59and I heard a guy go,
35:00hey, beautiful.
35:01And I didn't look at him.
35:03Not because I felt harassed,
35:05but I thought,
35:05there's a chance
35:06he's not talking to me.
35:09And I didn't want
35:10to risk it
35:10and be like,
35:11who, me?
35:12He's like,
35:12oh, no.
35:16And then I just have to be like,
35:18oh, sorry.
35:24I just thought, like,
35:26beautiful.
35:28Turns out he's just doing
35:29his daily affirmations
35:30and he's like,
35:31hey, beautiful.
35:34You got this.
35:36It's fun.
35:37If you're insecure enough,
35:39you kind of can't
35:39get harassed, right?
35:41Like, I was walking
35:42behind a guy
35:43and he was walking
35:43a dog on a leash
35:44and the dog
35:45kept looking back at me.
35:48And the guy
35:48was very smooth.
35:49He said to the dog
35:50audibly, he's like,
35:52why do you keep
35:52looking at her, huh?
35:55Just because she's
35:55cute and blonde?
35:58And instead of thinking,
35:59like, oh,
36:00that's a clever way
36:00to hit on a woman,
36:01I just thought,
36:02nah, that dog's
36:02not attracted to me,
36:03probably.
36:04I'm just kidding.
36:05Nah.
36:08But I'm married.
36:10I am.
36:10I'm married.
36:11Yeah.
36:11Oh, yeah.
36:14I love my husband.
36:16I love it.
36:16He loves to camp.
36:18And I think
36:19camping is stupid.
36:21It's so dumb
36:22because you go outside
36:24and then you do
36:26all this work
36:27and you bring
36:28all this crap
36:29with you
36:29to make it feel
36:31like you're still
36:31kind of inside.
36:34You could just
36:35stay home
36:36and let a couple
36:37squirrels in.
36:39Right?
36:41But I get it.
36:42You gotta go camping.
36:43You have to have
36:43all the different
36:44experiences in life
36:45just to know
36:46that you didn't
36:47have to have
36:48any of them.
36:51That's the only
36:52way to know.
36:52You gotta just
36:53do it
36:54and regret.
36:56Like, I didn't
36:57have to go
36:57apple picking
36:58but I needed
36:59to to know
37:00that I shouldn't
37:01have.
37:03I had to have
37:04the experience
37:05of like...
37:14Is it just like
37:15all of them
37:16or what are we
37:16doing here?
37:20You gotta go
37:21through it
37:22because you
37:22don't want
37:22to wonder
37:23what if
37:23what if
37:24I went
37:24apple picking?
37:26Because wondering
37:27is the fear
37:27of regret.
37:29Regret is just
37:30knowledge.
37:31So I think
37:32do as much
37:33and regret
37:33as much
37:33as you can.
37:34That's why
37:34I got married.
37:35I'll regret it
37:35later.
37:45But then I'll
37:45know.
37:46I won't be up
37:47at night like
37:47oh is he the
37:48one that got
37:48away?
37:49Nah he should
37:50have gotten
37:50away.
37:53But I'm out
37:53late a lot
37:54doing comedy
37:55and I was
37:55getting food
37:56after a show
37:56recently and
37:57the guy was
37:58giving me my
37:58change and
37:59he pulled the
38:00quarter from
38:01out of my
38:02ear.
38:04I didn't like
38:05that.
38:07He did a
38:07non-consensual
38:08magic trick.
38:11You gotta ask
38:12first do you
38:13want to see a
38:14magic trick?
38:15Otherwise it's
38:16just deceit.
38:19and the thing
38:20is all deceit
38:21in life is
38:22actually fine
38:23if you just
38:24start it with
38:25do you want
38:26to see a
38:26magic trick?
38:28All deceit.
38:29If my
38:29narcissistic
38:30ex-boyfriend
38:31had just begun
38:32the relationship
38:35hey you want
38:36to see a
38:36magic trick?
38:38I love you.
38:44And five
38:45years later he
38:45breaks up.
38:46He's like
38:46ta-da!
38:47I'm like
38:47whoa!
38:49How'd you do
38:49that?
38:56But I'm in a
38:56healthy marriage
38:57now.
38:58It's good.
38:58I'm trying to
38:58eat healthier
38:59too.
38:59I'm thinking
39:00of giving up
39:00meat.
39:01My friend
39:02she's not a
39:02full vegetarian
39:03but she doesn't
39:04eat smart
39:05animals.
39:06That's where
39:07she draws a
39:07line morally.
39:08No pigs
39:09no octopus
39:10apparently they're
39:10very intelligent.
39:11She doesn't
39:11think they
39:12should be
39:12eaten.
39:14Kind of a
39:14mean way to
39:15decide who
39:17gets to
39:17live.
39:19I'm walking
39:20by a pig
39:20or an octopus
39:21I'm just like
39:21yes hello
39:23carry on
39:25very smart.
39:26Oh I read
39:27that too.
39:33I walk by a
39:34chick and I'm
39:34like you stupid
39:35chicken I'm
39:35going to eat
39:36you.
39:37You're so
39:38dumb.
39:42The chicken's
39:42just looking
39:43at me and
39:44I'm like
39:45that chicken's
39:46not attracted
39:46to me probably.
39:47Thank you so
39:48much I'm
39:49Isabel Hagen.
39:56Isabel Hagen
39:58come on
39:59come on
40:00her special
40:01At the Bitter
40:02End is available
40:03on YouTube.
40:04we'll be right
40:05back everybody.
40:06Come on
40:07fantastic bud.
40:09The pizza
40:10perfected
40:11the Buddha
40:11invested
40:12with
40:19My thanks
40:20My thanks to
40:20Nikki Glaser
40:21Jesse Tyler
40:22Ferguson
40:23Ellis Siller
40:24Isabel Hagen
40:26once again
40:26come on
40:28and the roots
40:30right there
40:30from Philadelphia
40:31Pennsylvania
40:33thank you for
40:34watching
40:34stay tuned for
40:35late night
40:35with Seth
40:36Myers
40:36good night
40:37everybody
40:37thank you
40:39get it
40:40got it
40:40gotta get
40:41ball
40:42got it
40:43got it
40:43ball
40:44got it
40:45do it
40:46do it
40:49ha
40:49Uh-huh.
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