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Short filmTranscript
00:03I'm nervous.
00:05I'm gonna take it one step at a time.
00:07In a world saturated with sex.
00:10I'm absolutely petrified.
00:12More young adults than ever are living without it.
00:16The thought of having sex with someone.
00:18Scares me.
00:19It gives me the ick.
00:20I'm missing out.
00:21Terrified.
00:22Nerve-racking.
00:22Gut-wrenching.
00:23Embarrassing.
00:24All I think about is what I'm gonna get wrong.
00:27Can you point to the outer lady?
00:30Nope.
00:34Now, 12 virgins are getting a crash course in intimacy.
00:39Social media, porn, dating apps.
00:42There are so many negative messages and we can help them blossom.
00:45Use it by stimulating the area.
00:48They'll be guided by experts.
00:50You see yourself as?
00:52Propulsive.
00:52To explore all aspects of intimacy.
00:56And maybe even have sex with a trained therapist.
01:00Do you wanna put a condom on?
01:03Or each other.
01:04Get a room, guys!
01:07I really do need to change my life.
01:10Who will be ready?
01:11Desperate times call for desperate measures.
01:14To go all the way.
01:23Over the past few days on Virgin Island.
01:26I feel so connected to you.
01:28Can I grab your butt?
01:29Learning the dynamics of dating.
01:31This is only phase three.
01:34What do I do?
01:35You have to stare into my eyes.
01:37Led to Callum and Katie becoming closer.
01:40Callum, you make me giddy.
01:42Tegan.
01:42You ready to lick my ass?
01:44Mm-hmm.
01:44Found self-acceptance in surrogate partner therapy.
01:47I'm definitely a lesbian.
01:50I think that's the best I've ever felt.
01:52And Bertie.
01:53You can kind of be all the way up and you can use my hips.
01:56Yes.
01:57Seems to be getting over his inhibitions.
01:59All that thrusting has made me hurt my bollocks.
02:03Now, the group face their biggest challenge yet.
02:07Bearing all.
02:09Nudity is really the phase that people dread.
02:11There are so many negative messages around bodies
02:13that the thought of like looking at yourself in the mirror
02:16can be really daunting.
02:18Noticing if you feel like you want to continue getting undressed.
02:21Lack of body confidence gets in the way of sex.
02:24Learning how to relax around nudity is an essential step
02:28in a sexual connection.
02:36Day seven.
02:38Almost the halfway point on Virgin Island.
02:44Oh, no.
02:46Oh, my gosh.
02:48And for many in the group, their biggest challenge yet.
02:52It's time to face and conquer the thing
02:54that may have been holding you back as the next phase is nudity.
02:57Please come to this workshop in as few clothes
02:59as you feel comfortable wearing.
03:01This is what I've been most scared for.
03:05It's a crucial stage.
03:07Morning.
03:08Morning.
03:09What happens today could define progress
03:12for the rest of the retreat.
03:14Have you read your letter?
03:15I was hoping we wouldn't be doing this one.
03:18I would like to feel less shameful, anxious about going fully undressed.
03:24I just don't think I would ever be able to do it.
03:27How are you feeling?
03:28I'm freaking out.
03:29Yeah?
03:30I don't want to do this.
03:34I really hate my body and I really hate what I look like.
03:37So I'm really scared.
03:40My whole body just now feels really tense.
03:43Good morning, Betty.
03:44Is it a good morning, really?
03:47Even when, like, I've worn a checkered shirt in public,
03:51because I'm worried that the bits, like, near the buttons expose the skin,
03:56I've always worn a vest under that.
03:57That's how self-conscious I've been about my body.
04:01I'm going to put my best sports bar on.
04:09Oh, I just want to hide.
04:12You all right?
04:13Er, as I'll ever be.
04:14In front of the experts and their peers...
04:17Here we go, everyone.
04:19..today's workshop is an opportunity for the virgins...
04:22Good morning.
04:23Hello, hello.
04:25..to prove how much confidence they have or haven't gained at the retreat.
04:30Welcome to the nudity phase of the course.
04:33There are so many negative messages out there
04:36that make us feel horrible about our bodies,
04:38and we really want to help you change that.
04:41Because at the end of the day, if you want to have sex,
04:44you will need to be naked in front of your partner,
04:47and that can be very awkward if you don't feel good about your body.
04:51So in a moment, we're going to start going up to the mirror one by one,
04:56and then disrobe.
04:57We believe the more that they're willing to reveal in this workshop,
05:01the more it can be rewarding,
05:04because that barrier of like,
05:06oh, no, I've never done this before,
05:07finally is gone.
05:09Learning how to see their bodies as beautiful,
05:12how to take a compliment,
05:14and how to say, this is my body.
05:17Who knows, they want to walk first.
05:33For 22-year-old Millie, body image has been a long-standing challenge.
05:39Hello.
05:42I've never been at peace with my body.
05:45Over the past few years, I've just been like,
05:47that should be toned, or that should be slim.
05:51Take your time, sweetheart.
05:53It's okay, take your time.
05:56And I think if I'm not liking my own body,
06:00how can anyone else?
06:03Yeah.
06:18I love you, body.
06:21I love you.
06:21It's okay.
06:22You can let the feelings come up.
06:26You can take it in.
06:29I don't really like my boobs.
06:31I feel like they look weird.
06:34My boobs are very similar to yours.
06:37They serves me very well.
06:42This is my body.
06:45This is my body.
06:53Who's ready?
06:58Callum.
07:01Go on, Callum.
07:04The last time someone's probably seen me naked,
07:06probably went, hmm, I don't know.
07:08Maybe when my mum walked in on me while I was changing.
07:10I can't think of any time that I've been naked in front of someone.
07:14Whenever you're ready,
07:19anything you want to share about your body?
07:21I've got quite strong shoulders.
07:23Can I take these off?
07:25Oh, please.
07:25Yeah?
07:26Yeah, I didn't know you were going to.
07:27Yay!
07:27Young, good ones.
07:32Now you can say this is my whole body.
07:35This is my body.
07:46One by one, each group member steps up.
07:49I'd like to be more muscular.
07:51Can I say you have, like, the perfect proportion?
07:55To face their reflection.
07:57Can you look in the mirror and say, this is my body?
08:00This is my body.
08:01While some have the confidence to bear all.
08:03The first thing that I thought was, damn, she's fucking hot.
08:10This is my body.
08:12I'm confident by myself.
08:14This is my body.
08:15It's my body.
08:16It's all mine.
08:17It's my body.
08:19It's my girl.
08:20That's mine.
08:23Others can only reveal so much.
08:26The power in your body is very attractive.
08:37Ed, would you like to come up?
08:42I don't like being nude around people.
08:45Mostly down to, like, my scars and my disability.
08:49My disability is Poland syndrome.
08:52I've got a smaller hand, bent fingers, no knuckle.
08:56Whenever you're ready, you can disrobe.
09:00I don't particularly like any part of my body.
09:03Certain bits stand out more.
09:05Scars from surgery.
09:06A lot of stuff I've done to myself.
09:09My first relationship fell apart quite, quite badly for me.
09:14I was self-harming.
09:17I've come to terms with the reason I did it.
09:20And although people say no one will notice to me, they will.
09:25You don't hear about a lot of males doing it.
09:27Yeah.
09:28It's quite a difficult thing.
09:31How would you feel if I just touched your scars with some love?
09:35Yeah.
09:35Yeah.
09:37Let's see if you can look at yourself.
09:40Yeah.
09:41Let's take one more second and you can just say,
09:43this is my body.
09:46This is my body.
09:52The majority of the group have faced their own reflection.
09:56Bertie, would you like to come up?
09:58Bertie is one of the last.
10:02I don't like the way I look without my clothes on.
10:06I tend to not look in the mirror because it's, I don't think it's a pretty sight.
10:15Take a moment and look at me.
10:17Okay.
10:17Yeah.
10:19When you're ready just to glimpse at the mirror and if you need to come back to my eyes.
10:24Yeah.
10:25Good job.
10:26You're doing it great.
10:31Can you say, this is my body?
10:35This is my body.
10:37This is my body.
10:46Katie, would you like to step up?
10:50I've always hated my looks on my body.
10:54Back in school, I really struggled with my confidence.
11:00I don't think there's anything about me that I like.
11:05Especially looks wise, I really just don't like it.
11:11I was always the monster.
11:13I got bullied really badly.
11:15I spat out, had things thrown at me.
11:18Social media pages made of me where they've edited my face onto like different, like, animals and stuff.
11:25Yeah, I've always been insecure and just hated the way I look, so.
11:39Okay, brave woman.
11:41This is so nice.
11:42Yeah.
11:43You're doing great.
11:47Yeah.
11:48Do you want to start and just say what you see?
11:52Fuck.
11:53I do this.
11:54I don't like it.
11:55I don't have a mirror at home, so I don't see this.
12:00Wow.
12:01So you want to take a minute and actually see if you can bring some loving eyes to your body?
12:07Thank God.
12:08Yeah, it's okay.
12:10Do you want to just say, this is my body?
12:16This is my body.
12:29I feel like you are the bravest people on the planet.
12:33One more step into self-reclamation and self-love.
12:46Hi, guys.
12:47Hi.
12:48Hello.
12:48Oh my God, you guys have clothes on.
12:50I know.
12:50Who are you?
12:52How's everyone feeling?
12:53Terrible.
12:54Terrible.
12:55I'm just not happy about revealing all my scars and stuff.
12:58I really never noticed them.
12:59Also, scars are cool.
13:00I have so many, which I love on my body.
13:02I'm like...
13:02They look sick.
13:03I don't mean like accidental or surgery.
13:06I mean like self-arm scars.
13:08My scars, like self-harm and stuff, I don't think I've ever been kind of secure with them.
13:13They're kind of a memory of a worse time, really.
13:17Fair play to everyone that went naked.
13:19I wish I could have done that.
13:21My boobs would have sagged down to my knees and I took my bra off.
13:25Have you heard that song?
13:26Do your boobs hang low?
13:28Do they walk or do it grow?
13:31Can you tie them in a knot?
13:33Can you tie them in a bow?
13:35That was really hard.
13:36I didn't enjoy it at all.
13:39It was just mental games in my head.
13:41I didn't want to do it, but I knew I had to, to just take this process one step further.
13:47You're doing really well.
13:48This is the phase that I've been scared about the most and now we're in it and I just feel
13:53like shit.
14:03Are you staying over here, Bertie, or are you going over there?
14:05I was going to stay over here.
14:06Don't want to leave you on your own.
14:08Sometimes I like being in my own company, but...
14:11I'll get that.
14:14As long as it's not like an awkward silence.
14:16Yeah.
14:20It's lunchtime on Virgin Island.
14:23I wanted to be a skinny legend.
14:25Go!
14:26Your weight is the least interesting thing about you.
14:28And for some of the group, the nudity phase has brought up deep-seated emotions.
14:34But it's the first thing you see about me.
14:36No, it's not.
14:37It's not your face.
14:37It's really not.
14:38Your face is the first thing you see.
14:39It's people.
14:39And you're also beautiful and your body is great as well.
14:42Yes.
14:42So it's like, it's clearly...
14:43And your personality is top tier.
14:48Yeah.
14:49Today we started the nudity phase and so many of them found the mirror.
14:53For the experts, one person in the workshop particularly caught their attention.
14:58I was super proud of Katie.
15:01When she was a child in school, people called her a monster.
15:04So for her to come up and to be only in her underwear was extremely brave.
15:10Yeah, I'm really looking forward today to checking in and saying, hey, what's happening here?
15:14She is indicating some deeper emotions with regards to how she sees herself and her self-worth.
15:20Mm-hmm.
15:21With Katie's pastel shaping her self-image, she's meeting clinical therapist Abby to explore what lies beneath.
15:30Everyone I watch on TV or on social media, they're all these beautiful, skinny, model-looking people.
15:36I'm sat here and I'm the complete opposite.
15:41I'm terrified to be naked in front of someone.
15:44I feel like they're going to look at my body and just pick apart every single bad thing like I
15:49do.
15:53Hi.
15:54Hi.
15:54Come on in.
15:57My biggest fear if things carry on and I don't lose my virginity is honestly not being able to have
16:03my own family.
16:04I want to hear from your perspective.
16:06What are the things that you want out of this work?
16:10I really, really would like to be more confident.
16:13I feel like I've got zero body confidence and it's bringing my daily life down.
16:18Mm-hmm.
16:20I got badly bullied like throughout the whole of secondary school.
16:23Mm-hmm.
16:23What have they made comments about?
16:25Just like how big I am, how ugly I am.
16:29Do you find yourself big or ugly?
16:31You do.
16:32Yeah, I always hate the way I look.
16:35Mm-hmm.
16:36And I always put myself down.
16:38Mm-hmm.
16:39Um, I don't like anything about myself, inside or out.
16:44Okay.
16:44So, I really do struggle.
16:46Yeah.
16:49What do we know about bullies?
16:52The horrible people.
16:53Why is their voice that important to you?
16:56I just feel like because they just align like their thoughts and my thoughts.
17:00They're just, they're the same.
17:02So, if I'm thinking it and they're saying it, then it must be the truth.
17:05Mm-hmm.
17:07Because you see yourself as?
17:09Repulsive.
17:11How does that feel hearing that out loud?
17:14Sad.
17:16Yeah.
17:17Yeah.
17:21You're the furthest thing from repulsive.
17:24You're, you're a human being.
17:28I don't see that though.
17:30What do you see?
17:33A monster.
17:37Yeah.
17:38And I've felt like this for so long.
17:40I genuinely don't think I've ever looked at myself and been like, even, yeah, half decent.
17:45Like not even like a, ooh, we look cute today.
17:48No.
17:53Change can occur in incremental steps.
17:59Is there any part of your body you appreciate?
18:03My hands.
18:05Take it a step further.
18:07Your nails are done.
18:09Yeah.
18:09They look really pretty.
18:11Can you appreciate the fact that I like taking care of my hands and my nails because it makes me
18:15feel?
18:17It makes me feel good.
18:18Okay.
18:19I think the more you practice it and the more you give yourself that permission to get out of that
18:24old language,
18:26it's gonna take time.
18:28And also it's a practice.
18:30Right.
18:38This phase is the hardest for me just because my own body actually terrifies me.
18:43We just took one extra step today.
18:46So I'm just hoping that I can accept it and accept myself.
18:56How was your one-to-one?
18:58Um, cried a little bit.
19:01Aw.
19:01When I had to bring up like all the old bullying and stuff but, um, she just said, say nice
19:07things to yourself, accept all the compliments and yeah.
19:10Really good, dude.
19:11I'm glad you had a good one.
19:12Yeah.
19:13If you're happy, we're happy.
19:15Yeah.
19:16You look beautiful, by the way.
19:17You're like, your skin's really glowing.
19:20Maybe it's like all the vitamin D that you're getting every day.
19:28Hello, mate.
19:29Go home for it, Bertie.
19:31I've tried this on the first day actually.
19:34Like Katie, this morning's workshop brought Bertie's body insecurities into sharp focus.
19:39I wouldn't do that.
19:40Oh, okay.
19:41What do you want to, what do you want to train?
19:42I have no idea.
19:43Probably the arms.
19:44Bring it behind your head.
19:46That's, that's good.
19:47Yeah, yeah, yeah.
19:48Yeah.
19:50God, Bertie.
19:53Actually, I might lie down.
19:58I see myself as very overweight and not attractive at all on a looks front.
20:07Whenever, if ever, have sex for the first time, it would probably be horrendously awkward.
20:15And yeah, the thought of me having sex is even making me laugh because I can just imagine it being
20:22so bad.
20:31When Bertie came up to the mirror, it is such a hard step for him.
20:35He was really proud of himself.
20:37It was a huge deal for him.
20:39Bertie is one of the least experienced in the group.
20:42He's never kissed a girl.
20:43He just needs to connect with his body.
20:46Yeah, I'm really excited to see what we need to do to feel more connected.
20:50It's so foundational to have body acceptance and it makes progress possible.
20:58Progress for Bertie could eventually mean having sex with surrogate partner therapist, Kat.
21:04Hi, good afternoon.
21:05If he can overcome his body issues.
21:08How did you feel about the workshop?
21:10When I was wearing my boxers, it was one of the biggest things I've ever done in my life.
21:15I have quite an insecurity about the size.
21:26That's what it is.
21:27To build confidence, Kat introduces an exercise focused on boundaries and consent called May I Will You.
21:35May I caress your arm?
21:37Okay, yes.
21:39Can I do it on both hands?
21:41No, because that was the ask, so we want to stay with what you asked.
21:48How did that feel?
21:50It felt very nice.
21:53May I suck your dick for five minutes?
21:59No.
21:59No.
22:00Yeah, yeah.
22:01No is a great answer.
22:02Yeah.
22:02Can you say a little more?
22:03I think we're not at that stage.
22:05Yeah, good job.
22:06Good owning your no.
22:08But I'm not ruling anything out.
22:11May I kiss you on the cheek?
22:14Yes.
22:21Will you...
22:22I feel like I just want you to, like, sit on me.
22:27I've got quite a big bottom and I don't want to crush you, so...
22:31It's really, really important that Bertie feels so much more confident with himself, with his body,
22:35and I don't think he'll feel safe being himself in intimacy without a lot of permission,
22:40and that's something that surrogate partner therapy can really give.
22:44Just lay back.
22:45All the way.
22:46You all right?
22:47Yeah, I'm all right.
22:48Okay.
22:51And guess what?
22:52What?
22:53You're not too heavy.
23:00Okay.
23:03I have an idea in mind.
23:07It's something that has never happened to me before.
23:14I was thinking, may I have my first kiss with you?
23:21I've not kissed anyone romantically, which, at 24, is a very strange thing to say, when that is the very,
23:31like, almost the first kind of step in a relationship, and I haven't even done that.
23:39It's a very strange thing.
23:39There's no shame.
23:40Okay.
23:41All right.
23:42And don't...
23:43I don't want any tongues or anything like that.
23:45No.
23:45Perfect.
23:46Just normally.
23:47It's not a flip.
23:48And you don't have to, like, you can just kind of relax.
23:51Okay.
23:51I don't want them to be too dry or anything.
23:53No, don't worry about it.
23:54All right.
23:54Okay.
24:02Good.
24:03That was my first kiss.
24:04You did great.
24:09Wow.
24:10That was fantastic.
24:11That was...
24:12Yeah.
24:13That...
24:13That...
24:14Yeah.
24:16Um...
24:17Thank you so much.
24:19As Bertie's confidence grows...
24:22There we go.
24:24He feels able to go further.
24:30Also, side note, I can tell just from under your pants that you don't have to worry about it.
24:35About size.
24:36Just so you know.
24:37Well...
24:38It's...
24:39It's...
24:39I'll say it.
24:40It's very stiff at the moment.
24:43Right.
24:43But when it's not, that's the problem.
24:45It's okay.
24:46You're a grower, not a shower.
24:48Yeah.
24:49Fair enough.
24:50Very.
24:51Very well.
24:53Thank you very much, Kat.
24:55See you.
24:55Love you.
24:56Bye.
24:57I am feeling absolutely incredible.
25:01I feel like the stress has been evaporated.
25:05The next session, I could potentially be getting my clothes off, maybe even fully naked.
25:10We're making very good progress.
25:19It's day two of the nudity phase on Virgin Island.
25:24Halfway through now.
25:25Yeah.
25:25I can't even think what's going to happen today.
25:27It should be easier.
25:28No.
25:29Never see that.
25:30You say that every time.
25:31Never see that, Alex.
25:38Building on yesterday's body acceptance, today's workshop is designed to take the group further.
25:44Oh, my God.
25:47Into more explicit territory.
25:50We have giant genitals on display because we want to just normalize every different kind
25:55of genital.
25:56Welcome.
25:57I don't know where to look.
25:59This workshop is all about getting familiar with your genitals and to understand where
26:03the pleasure centers are and how to start to get in touch with them.
26:07Any feelings that come up with it?
26:09Yeah.
26:09Very uncomfortable.
26:10Mm-hmm.
26:11Yeah.
26:12I'm less uncomfortable.
26:13It's more like intrigued kind of thing.
26:15I feel more comfortable with this side.
26:17Hence why I'm sat here.
26:21First thing I want you to notice is they'll look very different depending.
26:26We want to invite Jason up.
26:29Oh, my God.
26:30If they want to have sex.
26:32Didn't even notice.
26:33The virgins are going to have to get better acquainted with real live genitals.
26:38I have touched like a penis.
26:40Couldn't see it.
26:41It was dark.
26:43I think I'm comfortable with female anatomy and male anatomy.
26:47I mean, maybe men are a bit more gross, but.
26:50I've pecked a lad before.
26:52And that's as far as any physical contact has ever gone with me and another lad.
26:58The first thing you'll see is that I am circumcised.
27:01So my foreskin doesn't cover the head or the glands of my penis.
27:05This ridge here where the head meets the shaft, this is called the corona.
27:12And this spot here is the frenulum.
27:16And this is also very, very sensitive.
27:20Thanks for going on this tour with me.
27:25I don't like this.
27:28Kat, would you like to come join us?
27:31I've watched pornography and I think the vaginas that I've seen, I worry that, you know, mine's not normal.
27:40I think I know what I'm talking about.
27:42But truthfully, I've probably got no bloody idea.
27:45All right.
27:46I obviously know what the female anatomy looks like, but I wouldn't know where to go, put it that way.
27:56Here is my vulva.
27:58Here's the outer labia.
28:00And then in here you have the inner labia.
28:03And here's the clitoral hood.
28:06And then there's the clitoris.
28:09I don't want to see other people naked.
28:11It doesn't come naturally to everyone.
28:13I don't feel comfortable.
28:16Also, where it feels good to be touched can change a lot within a sexual experience.
28:21So it's just important to be able to communicate with your partners about what feels good.
28:32Any feelings that come up?
28:33I was uncomfortable at first, but I feel like I've learned a lot.
28:36Do you feel that your comfort level changed a little bit?
28:38A little bit.
28:39I still don't know where to look, but...
28:41It is overwhelming.
28:42Like, don't get us wrong.
28:46Cheers, guys.
28:48Bye.
28:49Bye.
28:52That whole thing I hated.
28:54It made me really uncomfortable, just from start to end.
28:57I'm glad they showed a variety of different...
29:00Yeah, that's what I think.
29:01It's the first time I've ever seen a vulva up close.
29:04I'd rather enjoy that.
29:07I'd be lying if I said it wasn't weird, but I actually found it quite useful.
29:11How do you find it, Bertie?
29:13All of a sudden I've gone off a Subway Megamate.
29:23So what did you think about the naked pictures?
29:26I'm not going to lie, from far away it looked like trees.
29:28It is some kind of wood in it, so...
29:30Yeah.
29:32Nice.
29:34I don't know if this is just a male thing, but it just seems like the vaginas have got a
29:36lot more going on.
29:37I also know now I'll never fully judge a guy for not finding the clip.
29:41There was a couple where I was like, I need to find it as well.
29:45I was like, OK, cool, got it.
29:48Thank you to Jason and Kat.
29:51Bless them.
29:52I feel like a lot more confident moving forward.
29:59It's not just the workshop that is giving Will confidence.
30:02We're letting that touch land in your body.
30:06As Ayesha takes steps to help him with his fears of premature ejaculation.
30:11What level of arousal did you feel?
30:13Really pressurable.
30:15But, like, I wasn't shooting over free, really.
30:20OK.
30:21Meanwhile, Joy is building up her techniques to overcome vaginismus.
30:25Touch your perineum.
30:27Yeah.
30:27And if you kind of, like, come up from the perineum a little bit, your finger will dip in.
30:33Yeah.
30:34Yeah.
30:34And what are you noticing if you're doing that?
30:37There is no discomfort.
30:39I didn't clench up in fear, and I was able to experience a little bit of pleasure.
30:45I've shown, like, myself that I can do it, even if it's just for that one little thing.
30:49So, see how next session goes.
30:53As Joy's confidence builds...
30:55It's more of a practical session to do.
30:58Yeah.
30:58..so too does Teagan's work with surrogate partner therapist Riston.
31:02She's showing me her vulva.
31:04This is the vagina.
31:06That is hot.
31:10..as things escalate from looking...
31:13..into touch.
31:16Hello.
31:18Come sit and we'll chat.
31:19Absolutely.
31:20We had talked about doing genital touch today.
31:23How are you feeling about that?
31:24A little bit of nerves.
31:25Yeah.
31:26Which is natural.
31:27But, no, mainly excited.
31:28Let's get undressed.
31:30Do you mind unzipping me?
31:32Yeah.
31:32OK, great.
31:33I've never been one-on-one with a woman in a bedroom or anything like that.
31:38Can you pull this up?
31:39Yes, again.
31:41Yeah.
31:42I don't know how to initiate the physical touch myself.
31:46There we go.
31:48And I want that sexual, romantic, intimate connection.
31:52Start pulling these off.
31:53Mm-hm.
31:55But I don't know how to get to that stage.
32:02How's that?
32:03Yeah, yeah.
32:03Good.
32:04The first thing I'm going to have you do...
32:06Mm-hm.
32:06..you're looking at me and that's great.
32:09I'm going to have you look at my pussy.
32:10Mm-hm.
32:11I don't notice any feelings that are coming up for you.
32:14It's hot.
32:17I would like you to, with the backs of your fingernails,
32:21run your hands up my thighs very slowly.
32:23Mm-hm.
32:24Go super slow.
32:27Mm-hm.
32:28Mm-hm.
32:31See if you can see my vaginal opening.
32:34Mm-hm.
32:35Can you see it?
32:36Yep.
32:36And with this finger.
32:38So don't go in, but just put the finger, like,
32:40right on the bottom of the hole.
32:42Mm-hm.
32:44Yep.
32:45That's nice.
32:47Mm-hm.
32:48That's nice.
32:56All right.
32:57I'm going to come cuddle you.
32:59I was nervous about giving pleasure,
33:02but, yeah, I feel like a lot of that,
33:05and those nerves have dissipated now.
33:06Hmm.
33:11Hiccup.
33:13Do you know what?
33:14You fingered me and I got the hiccups.
33:17Hmm.
33:18Guess we've got to get back up, haven't we?
33:20Mm-hm.
33:21Oh, I'm bothering.
33:22It was the first time I had my fingers inside my woman.
33:26I feel like a whole new person.
33:27You do?
33:28Yeah.
33:28Yeah.
33:29Yeah.
33:32I don't think I've felt happier being on the island right now
33:35than right now.
33:35I feel it's big.
33:37I feel it's big.
33:38I feel it's big.
33:38It's a massive step forward for me.
33:41Bye.
33:41See you later.
33:42Bye.
33:42That's a big barrier that I've had in my way,
33:44and I feel like I'm a big step closer to losing my virginity.
33:48See you.
33:57The sun is shining on Virgin Island.
34:00Hope you know which way we're going.
34:02No.
34:03We're going down here.
34:04And for the last afternoon of the nudity phase,
34:06clothing is optional.
34:08We asked a group to take nude photos in pairs.
34:11Who's going first?
34:12I'll take your picture.
34:13Go on, all right.
34:14It's all about the good shots, Jason.
34:16You do you.
34:16This is all about having fun.
34:20Oh, my God.
34:21Here we go.
34:23The goal is to help them feel relaxed around their bodies
34:26and feel comfortable with nudity.
34:28For some of the group...
34:30There we go.
34:31...improved body confidence is on full display.
34:33That's it, yeah.
34:34Ready?
34:35I've never felt this sexy in my life.
34:39Please say you didn't laugh until after.
34:43That just felt empowering,
34:45and I was like, massive sleigh to me.
34:48Smile.
34:51I thought there was some power there,
34:53some sort of strength,
34:54and I think maybe I hadn't seen myself in that light before.
34:56Good?
34:59I'm getting sexy vibes.
35:01Not bad.
35:02Okay.
35:02Take a bath.
35:03Woo!
35:04I don't mind being nude in, like, the ocean.
35:06One.
35:07One.
35:07And I wanted to prove to myself I could at least do it.
35:11Three, two, one.
35:12Over!
35:14But for others, bearing all for the camera is still a step too far.
35:18I tried this, I guess.
35:21Oh!
35:22Oh!
35:23Shit!
35:24Not that.
35:26That's how you do it.
35:27I didn't feel like getting naked today,
35:29and I'm glad that Callum told me he wasn't going to get his willy out,
35:35because after the morning workshop, I think we've seen enough of those for one day.
35:40After a tough time in yesterday's mirror workshop...
35:43Oh, that's cute.
35:45Katie is showing tentative signs of progress.
35:48I wish I could show you. It looks really good.
35:49I know. I'd love to be able to see.
35:51Your boobs look so good.
35:52It's just been a bit scary, but these little steps are making me, like, open up.
35:59Ooh!
36:01That's it.
36:02Like Katie...
36:03It's going to be very underwhelming, I'm telling you now,
36:05because, like, I'm still in clothes, so...
36:07I'm getting undressed here.
36:09The nudity phase has exposed some of Ed's body insecurities.
36:16I'm just glad this phase is nearly over.
36:19Anything's easier than this one.
36:20My scars and my disability.
36:23There's certain things, especially with intimacy,
36:27where I do feel like it's going to negatively impact it.
36:33The scars are embarrassing.
36:34It makes even, like, just cuddling with someone a little bit more awkward.
36:39It feels like I'm kind of stalled in life.
36:43I feel a bit like a kid, to be honest.
36:45Having built up a relationship with Ed at the retreat...
36:48Hello.
36:49How are you?
36:50Better than this morning.
36:52That's good.
36:53Expert Cat feels she can relate to his body issues
36:56from her own personal experience.
36:59I noticed that Ed had scars, and that's something he was really insecure about coming in.
37:04And I also do.
37:06And so it felt really powerful to, like, share that space.
37:09I think something that's really important for you to practice is, like, really coming to people as equals.
37:16Okay.
37:17And I saw your scars.
37:18It was confronting for me because it's a part of myself that I still can feel so much shame around.
37:25I get that.
37:25But when I see them on you, I don't have any judgment.
37:29Like, I only feel so much, like, love and compassion, and it creates more of a sense of care.
37:35It just felt really comforting to, like, not feel alone with it, if that makes sense.
37:42Do you feel comfortable taking off your shirt?
37:45Yeah.
37:54And I'm gonna take my bra off, too.
37:56Okay.
38:00Okay.
38:01How are you feeling now?
38:03A little bit nervous.
38:04Yeah, just start by looking and breathing.
38:08Is it okay if I touch you?
38:11Will you touch me also?
38:13Mm-hmm.
38:17Can you sit down?
38:19Yeah.
38:22Will you touch my scars while I touch yours?
38:25Yes.
38:26Yes.
38:27Does that feel okay?
38:28Yeah.
38:28Yeah.
38:28Okay.
38:29I have one on my chest as well.
38:32The worst one is the one down on my arm.
38:34That one.
38:35Mm-hmm.
38:36That's what made me stop.
38:37Mm-hmm.
38:42I'm always worried about people touching mine and not knowing how it feels to them.
38:47So, with you, I feel like I can be vulnerable as well.
38:54And, like, I'm not alone.
39:04Right.
39:04Yeah.
39:04It's alright to touch your face.
39:13Thank you, Ke.
39:16knowing that we've both got scars and possibly for like similar reasons i didn't feel any like
39:23body issues at all i completely forgot that i have any um and i felt really good about myself
39:38oh jason this morning i was like i looked in the mirror when katie your eyebrows look really good
39:46today that's brilliant and also i feel like after yesterday's exercise that's what you need and
39:50obviously it's all positive things so like clocked on it's all mental while katie makes tentative
39:57progress on her body image jason your hair looks lovely
40:07yay the experts wanted to take the plunge and move on from her past
40:15i'm going to be seeing katie today and the things that people have said to her about her body and
40:20her
40:20looks are truly destroying of a person's sense of dignity i would love to bring katie to the mirror
40:29if she feels ready and to start to find something that brings her joy would be i think a big
40:35step
40:36yeah yeah ayesha plans to revisit the mirror exercise one last time
40:47social media is really hard for bullying people will just constantly pick you apart and make you
40:53feel more insecure i've had a lot of things posted on me i was scrolling through once and someone had
41:02asked asked who's the ugliest girl in school and this person had written my full name that was really difficult
41:15hello hello i'm just feeling which piece of clothing wants to come off um let's do my top okay great
41:26i really don't like this i feel like i've got so much bad like skin and stuff so much hatred
41:34for myself
41:36see if you can remember being with your body and not hating it
41:50that must have been so nice young katie did not care what others thought or what others said
41:56yeah and she didn't hate herself yeah sometimes katie what happens is when we live with people who torment
42:04us we can actually carry their voice in our head and we think it's ours but it's not ours
42:18noticing if you feel like you want to continue getting undressed or if you feel good as you are um
42:24i
42:25can take the shorts off okay this is so weird okay what's happening now i'm sick of just hating every
42:39part and just looking at the bad parts of myself how do you want your body to feel i wish
42:47that i would
42:48have let go of nasty things created for me on social media yeah i've screenshotted it and i've
42:55still got the pictures on my phone from many many years ago wow because i like to look back at
43:01them
43:01and make myself feel bad again what would letting it go have looked like not even thinking about it
43:08ever again because they don't deserve it and i don't deserve it yeah after years of criticism
43:14shaping how katie sees herself would you like to do it dressed or undressed dress okay great now ayesha
43:22challenges her to push back my hair uh-huh it's so dead but it grows really quickly
43:32my stomach i hate how big it is but it fuels me every single day you're rocking right now katie
43:40my boobs are very droopy but i feel like they suit my body yeah i want to be a mum
43:51so bad so yeah milk
43:54yeah comfort my babies wow beautiful
44:01thank you so much see you later see you later i really loved how relaxed and comfortable i felt
44:07this new growth and self-exploration that i've found has just changed my entire life i would love to be
44:15able to just carry that on so i'm really happy
44:24as the sun sets on the nudity phase everybody come on over the experts have gathered to give the group
44:32one
44:33final opportunity to shed their inhibitions you just finished the nudity phase and we are so proud of
44:42you so many of you got naked and felt more comfortable relationship with your body and that's like a
44:50culmination and celebration of this phase we all take a little group swim together you can undress to your
44:58level of comfort i will be going full naked who's brave enough
45:03you're thinking about it let's go fernie you're taking your shoes off
45:31when we jumped in the sea naked it was so freaking the nudity phase is awesome
45:39i have absolutely no idea why i did that but hey i'm absolutely glad that i did it's definitely
45:45one of the biggest things ever done i feel like i've ended the phase on a high i've learned how
45:51to be a little bit nicer to myself every single person is different um and every single body is
45:57different it's crazy to think about but right here right now yeah i feel like i could do anything
46:06next time hit my hands with the dick things get hands-on you can put your finger inside
46:15i'm just kidding as a special guest arrives for the playtime phase
46:19hmm and a fantasy get on your knees becomes reality good boy
46:27hmm
46:39hmm
46:56Transcription by CastingWords
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