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Scrubs S01E01 [Full Movie] [Recommended]Full EP - Full
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00:02Gunshot wound to the left side, seems to have missed the heart, what shredded the lung.
00:05BP dropping, he's hypoxic to 70.
00:07He must have nicked a vessel, gotta find the bleeder.
00:10Prep for thoracotomy, on my count, 3, 2, 1.
00:13Order two units of Onank.
00:15Scalpel.
00:16A career in medicine can take you down many different paths.
00:19Spread her.
00:21If you're lucky, you end up where you're supposed to be.
00:24Found it, clamp.
00:27Clamping.
00:30BP rising.
00:32Great save, J.D.
00:33Great, let's get him to R, guys.
00:38Stop it.
00:41Dorian, Dorian.
00:42Stop it.
00:43You guys are crazy.
00:45Stop it.
00:46No.
00:47Stop.
00:48Dr. Dorian?
00:49Yeah.
00:49Will you sign my tattoo?
00:51Sure.
00:52That was a good hair day.
00:55Great job, man.
00:57Glad you're feeling better.
01:04Dr. Dorian?
01:07Dr. Dorian?
01:08Do I need stitches?
01:09Sure, being a concierge doctor isn't non-stop excitement, but I have more time to see my kids.
01:14No, Frank.
01:15For cuts this small, we just use a little dab of glue.
01:18Fantastic job keeping your food journal, Lisa.
01:20I just didn't expect to see the word smashburger on every page.
01:24It's really been a full four hours?
01:26We gotta get that thing down, Reggie.
01:28And making house calls for the upper crust sure pays well.
01:31I'm more concerned with how it's leaning.
01:33Yep.
01:33This was my life now.
01:35That's why it felt so weird to be back at Sacred Heart.
01:39I live an hour away, but one of my patients collapsed at her grandson's soccer tournament nearby and got admitted.
01:44So here I am.
01:48Okay, listen up, people.
01:50Listen up.
01:50That means you, Neck Grace.
01:52Some things never change.
01:54This hospital is code black, which means we are at capacity.
01:57So unless you got a baby's head peeking out from between your legs, do not ask me how much longer.
02:02How much longer, Mamacita?
02:04Unless you are...
02:05Oh, my God, Bambi!
02:08What the hell?
02:11Does Turk know you're here?
02:12He has no idea.
02:17J.D. is here.
02:22Turk!
02:23J.D.
02:26Coming in hot!
02:28Ready to receive!
02:31Joe Eagle!
02:34Oh, no, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
02:35My back.
02:36No, no, it's your sciatica.
02:37Engage your core, C-Bear.
02:39Oh, I'm going down.
02:40Pull up.
02:40I'm going down.
02:45I think it might be time to retire, Eagle.
02:47She's right, J.D.
02:48It's time.
02:49Call it.
02:50Okay.
02:51Time of death.
02:53You know I actually can't see that without my glasses.
02:56I can't do this all on my own.
03:00No, I know.
03:02I'm no Superman.
03:07I'm no Superman.
03:11So, now that you're in town, should we go out to dinner?
03:14Yes.
03:15Do you guys have a place to usually go?
03:16Buddy, we haven't been out to dinner since the Disney princesses were white.
03:19Besides, baby, I could really use some man time.
03:22Turk was surrounded by female energy.
03:24He had four daughters, Izzy, Ellie, Sophia, and Nora.
03:28Izzy, Beetle, take care of Bella Bella.
03:30Daddy, why don't I have a nickname?
03:32Oh, you do, sweetness?
03:34You had an accident.
03:36Turk.
03:37Fine.
03:38Have you guys night out.
03:39Yes.
03:40See you later.
03:40See you later, guys.
03:42Ow.
03:44Nostalgia washed over me.
03:45The smell of the bleached floors.
03:47The blinding fluorescent lights.
03:50The closet where Elliot and I hid from our very first code.
03:52That's where our love story began.
03:55Tell me right here.
03:57Okay.
03:58See?
04:00Holy crap.
04:01J.D.
04:01Good God.
04:02You're like a blonde ninja.
04:03What the frick?
04:03Why are you here?
04:04Oh, by the way, our marriage didn't make it.
04:06I have a patient.
04:07I'll be gone soon.
04:07I promise.
04:08Your promises mean just about as much as...
04:17We agreed in couples counseling that in order to have a healthy post-divorce life, we need
04:21to respect each other's space.
04:22I hate couples counseling.
04:24Could you please be mindful of your tone to avoid negative patterns from our marriage?
04:27I love couples counseling.
04:29Look, J.D., I've really been working on myself, okay?
04:30I've been lighting a candle for every resentment I had about our marriage and floating them
04:34across the pond at Winston Park.
04:36I'm in a good place.
04:37I don't want to backslide.
04:38I can't just light all those candles again.
04:40It was really cold and I got a ticket for scaring the ducks.
04:45There's my gal.
04:47Oh, goodness, Jonathan.
04:49They've got teenagers working here.
04:51Those are just interns, Mrs. Brooks.
04:53Okay, your labs look fine.
04:56I think you're just dehydrated.
04:57Who admitted you?
04:58I did.
04:59Oh, uh, can I ask why?
05:01No judgment.
05:02None taken.
05:03I admitted her because I'm a good doctor.
05:05Oh, Dr. Park, is it?
05:08When doctors fight in front of a patient, they always try to make it sound friendly.
05:12These labs are normal for a woman of her age?
05:15If it helps, I could explain to you what all these fancy numbers mean.
05:19It's so nice to meet an incredibly stupid person.
05:23Her abdominal pain suggests ischemic valve.
05:25No.
05:26All she needs is hydration and emollient laxatives.
05:29And there he was, the chief of medicine, my mentor.
05:33At least he couldn't call me newbie anymore.
05:36What can I do for you there, oldie?
05:38Damn it.
05:39Perry, Dr. Park here needs to know that my medical expertise is on par with his.
05:43Well, now, Dr. Park graduated top of his class at Stanford, whereas your current claim
05:48to fame is handing out erections like tiny hot dogs at a bar mitzvah.
05:52We'll run a blood gas on her and see who's right.
05:54Is that what you're doing?
05:55Hmm.
05:56It's out of me at J.D.A.
05:58Dr. Park is teaching me Korean.
05:59Did I hear my name in there?
06:01No.
06:01Walk with me.
06:02I, uh, heard about the divorce.
06:04Sorry about that.
06:05Also, thankful I, uh, won five dollars off of mickhead.
06:09I took the yonder.
06:11Actually, it is good to see you.
06:13I miss the days when you were an intern.
06:15Oh, you don't have to say that.
06:16I knew it.
06:16He's about to ask you to play golf at his fancy private club.
06:19Damn it.
06:19Why did you only learn the mini kind?
06:21Get a load of this motley crew.
06:28No, no, no.
06:29Sorry.
06:29I am not sure how to teach these kids.
06:32I can't work them crazy hours or even abuse them anymore.
06:35And that's a bad thing.
06:36Exactly.
06:37I wasn't sure if you'd get that.
06:39I am now supposed to watch every word that comes out of my mouth because apparently they
06:44are all fragile little Christmas ornaments.
06:46Case in point.
06:48Tick, tock, tock.
06:49Oh, hey, Dr. Cox.
06:51Tomorrow I am going to perform a central line placement and it would just be fabulous if
06:56you could come in early and observe.
06:58I'm good.
06:59I just watched one on YouTube like two days ago.
07:01It slapped.
07:02Do you know Dr. Randy?
07:03He's my favorite creator.
07:04He breaks down procedures while doing bedtime ASMR.
07:06It'll give you really graphic dreams.
07:08I'll send it to you.
07:08You're gonna die.
07:09I will die if you send it to me because then I'll just have to murder you.
07:13And with all these witnesses, I think it's pretty safe to assume they'll give me the share.
07:19Dr. Cox, I'm gonna need you to go ahead and bring it down.
07:25Work-life balance is a core principle of our wellness program.
07:28Now, if you can't embrace that, then you'll have to join me at my sensitivity training workshop.
07:34Don't I get three strikes?
07:35You have 900 strikes.
07:38Women's like the damn feelings police.
07:42Feelings police?
07:45Go change your shirt.
07:46You look chubby in that.
07:48Feelings police!
07:51Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
07:53You know he's insecure about his body.
07:56He's just not ready to show you his vulnerability yet.
07:58Wow.
07:59You're really in touch with male feelings.
08:01How do you think I became a feelings cop?
08:03Uh...
08:04What the hell?
08:08I could help so many people.
08:13Hey.
08:14Good morning, sir.
08:17Dr. Chapstick is flirting with you?
08:19I don't know.
08:20I'm never sure.
08:21Last Thursday, he did tell me that he thought I had a cute burp.
08:24Tark thoughts?
08:25Yeah, he totally wants to get on that flat ass.
08:28I had planned to accidentally burp near him again today, but then J.D. threw me off my
08:32game.
08:32Oh, stop worrying about J.D. here.
08:35Chug half of that and go launch a cute burp into that man's face.
08:39Hey.
08:43Hey, guys.
08:45Crack!
08:45I cannot believe I wasted that on you.
08:47I actually missed those.
08:49Hey, by the way, if you can get out of here early, we can hit the happy hour that has
08:52those
08:52awesome free wings.
08:53Tashauna, can you go see if there's an open OR?
08:56You know our diabetic guy, Mr. Kiefer.
08:57Let's move his toe amputation up to now.
09:00On it, Dr. Turk.
09:01I'll tell the patient there's a free wing issue.
09:03Well, don't do that.
09:04We'll mention the wings, please.
09:04Don't do that.
09:05No, no.
09:06Just one more test, and if the results are what I think they are, I should be able to
09:10get you out of here today, all right?
09:11Oh, thank goodness.
09:13Hold it.
09:14Can you babysit these for a minute, please?
09:16I need to go count to ten.
09:17This one asked if he could shut his eyes while I place a central line.
09:21Well, admittedly, I do still get a little woozy around some procedures.
09:24All procedures.
09:25All procedures.
09:26Oh.
09:27Okay, well, let's start by introducing yourself.
09:29This is Mrs. Brooks.
09:30I'm Dr. Green.
09:31I believe kindness is the best medicine.
09:33Actually, medicine is the best medicine.
09:35You're going to get an arterial blood gas on Mrs. Brooks.
09:37She's going to do it.
09:38I'm going to puke if I do it.
09:39I don't want him puking on me.
09:41If he pukes, I'll puke.
09:42No one is puking, okay?
09:43You got this.
09:52Oh, my God.
09:53This is humiliating.
09:54Captain Bedside faced that way.
09:56Yeah, I think that's probably for the best.
09:58Now, don't be overconfident.
09:59Finding the radial artery can be tricky.
10:01I'm in.
10:02Nice job, Blake.
10:03You made that look handsome.
10:04Easy.
10:05Easy does it.
10:07I got to admit, I miss teaching.
10:10That's what this place is all about.
10:12Dr. Turtle?
10:12Hmm?
10:13Maybe I could close?
10:14No, just watch.
10:16Okay.
10:17Damn, I wish this guy would just die all at once instead of in tiny little pieces.
10:24I don't know how much more I can take of this, but I'm not going to let him crush my
10:27spirit.
10:28We can't let Dr. Bummer break us.
10:31See, this is what I really miss.
10:32The hot goss.
10:34Who's Dr. Bummer?
10:35I don't know.
10:35Some other guy.
10:36He's definitely not your best friend.
10:37Turk's not a bummer.
10:38He is the worst.
10:39There's no way.
10:40And if he's ever in a bad mood, all you got to do is go,
10:42What's up?
10:43And he'll die laughing.
10:45I swear.
10:45Try it.
10:46What's up?
10:47Go practice.
10:48Carla, do you know Turk's interns call him Dr. Bummer?
10:51Well, I mean, I'm sure you know how Dr. Turk's been at work lately.
10:55Just nod like you do.
10:56And he refuses to talk about it.
10:58You all talking about Dr. Turk?
11:00If so, where's that?
11:02Even Hooch knows?
11:07Is Hooch still crazy?
11:08He's gotten worse.
11:09Doctor.
11:09Thanks.
11:10Here you go.
11:11Just what I wanted to see.
11:14Hey, Sea Bear.
11:15I was right about my patient.
11:17Want to come watch me rub it in Dr. Cox's face like the good old days?
11:20You know I do.
11:22Hey, but you know what?
11:22You should chew a big wad of gum.
11:24You always look tough when you chew gum.
11:25I do look tough when I chew gum.
11:27I hope they have berry blast.
11:31Excuse me, doctor.
11:33My wife's outside in the car throwing up.
11:36It might just be the stomach flu, but...
11:37So you're going to have to go to the ER?
11:40If we go to the ER, we're going to be crushed with bills.
11:43I think we'll just wait in the car in case it gets worse, but could you just take a quick
11:48look at her?
11:49Look, man.
11:51You can't order health care from your car, okay?
11:53It's a hospital, not a Wendy's.
11:55Sorry.
11:57You didn't have to be so hush.
11:58If you want to go help them, help them.
12:00You're going to get fired, but I think we'll all live.
12:03Let's go, Kim.
12:04It's Sam.
12:06A word, Perry?
12:07Yeah, a word, Perry.
12:09So it turns out that Mrs. Brooks' blood gas...
12:11I can't understand a word you're saying.
12:13I know, because the club has too much bubble.
12:14I can't control it.
12:15The berry's blasting all over my mouth.
12:16Give it to me.
12:17Go ahead.
12:18Mrs. Brooks' blood gas came back.
12:20She's not acidotic.
12:21Dr. Park, you were wrong.
12:22Your boy botched it.
12:23Well, my boy here needs the burn unit because he's on fire.
12:27You both owe me an apology.
12:28I'd rather self-circumcise.
12:30Ah.
12:31Gummy.
12:32You two idiots are perfect for each other.
12:35He's not wrong, by the way.
12:36I managed to last him.
12:38Yeah, what if?
12:38Let's get wings.
12:39You look so tough right now.
12:42That went so well with Dr. Cox, I decided to press my luck.
12:46What's been going on with you, man?
12:47I'm hearing you're in a rough place.
12:49Nah, that's nothing.
12:50Your interns call you Dr. Bummer.
12:51You know, I really don't want to talk about it right now.
12:53I just want to go out and blow off some steam.
12:56Actually, Turk, just hold on one second.
12:58Oh, boy.
12:59Come on, man.
13:00What is up?
13:01I'm burnt out.
13:03Okay?
13:04My patient today is a perfect example.
13:06Once he heals, he's going to ignore my advice and go right back to drinking and eating garbage.
13:11And I'll keep removing body parts until he eventually dies on my table.
13:14And his family will ask me, why couldn't you do more?
13:17You know, back in the day when you were here, we could at least get up on the roof and
13:20laugh the day off with a couple of beers, but we can't do that anymore, can we?
13:31There's no joy, none.
13:34Why haven't you told me this?
13:35I could have been there for you.
13:37I don't think you can relate to what I'm going through anyway.
13:39I mean, you write scripts in the suburbs.
13:45I don't feel like going on anymore.
13:46I'm going to go home.
13:48Turk!
13:50What's up?
13:52Not tonight, J.D.
13:55Ooh, you okay?
13:56No.
13:57Good.
13:58Did you at least discharge my patient?
14:00Dr. Cox wants me to keep her for another night.
14:03Toodles.
14:05Are you kidding me?
14:10I was doing my best angry walk because after Turk told me he was going home last night, I heard
14:15he went out with someone else.
14:16What the hell, man?
14:17You went out with the Todd?
14:18I knew with you would be therapy.
14:19I didn't want to go deep.
14:20The Todd really likes to go deep.
14:23With consent, five.
14:27Hey, Carla, if you were planning on having sex with Turk tonight, don't.
14:31He doesn't deserve it.
14:32She's not.
14:33There's sex night Thursday.
14:34Stop telling everyone what to do.
14:36Elliot.
14:37What?
14:37I didn't even mention that you do it in the minivan because of the kids.
14:39Oh.
14:40I'm sorry.
14:41I've just been a little bit tense because someone decided to keep J.D.'s patient here a little bit longer.
14:45Why is J.D. being here so very hard on you?
14:48Aren't you the one who ended the marriage?
14:50Where did you hear that?
14:51Who can say?
14:52Carla.
14:53Barbie.
14:54Carla and I have been sharing secrets since before you and your sorority sisters were in Panama City flashing the
15:00cameras for girls gone wild.
15:02I was told I would be pixelated.
15:03Elliot is in a lot of pain, okay?
15:05Okay?
15:06Ah, yes.
15:06In the history of relationships, it has always been hardest on the one who ends it.
15:13Well, I'm not being a jerk, am I?
15:15Oh, sweetie.
15:18It's gonna be fine.
15:23The second I saw Dr. Cox, I turned my angry walk right back on.
15:28Why is Mrs. Brooks still here?
15:30Why do you have the physique of a menopausal lesbian?
15:32Whoa, too mean.
15:34Not now, oldie.
15:36This is frustrating.
15:38You gave me the impression that you were able to place a central line since you learned from your Dr.
15:45Randy, was it?
15:45Yeah, but he was really chill and you're giving mean football coach vibes?
15:49Miss Tosh, you'll notice I'm not saying Dr. Tosh.
15:53Dr. Cox?
15:58Oh, thank you.
16:00You know, it used to be see one, do one, teach one.
16:05Alas, now it is see one, see one, see one, see one, see one more.
16:09Call your therapist.
16:11Talk about how it felt to see one.
16:13Decide that seeing one is just too triggering.
16:15It would take a Xanax to calm down, an Adderall to lock in, and finally, focus enough to be able
16:22to write about the whole ordeal in your dream journal.
16:25Of course, if your dream is to be a mediocre doctor, mission accomplished, and by all means, hang on to
16:31the scrubs.
16:31Maybe use them for Halloween, because you're damn sure not going to be using them around here much longer.
16:37Okay, I'll see you Saturday.
16:38Worth it.
16:41Feelings please.
16:42What?
16:43Oh, it's this little song I hear in my head whenever I see you.
16:45Oh, I love it.
16:47Feelings with me.
16:48You got it.
16:51Hey, you can do this.
16:53Guide that finer needle into the jugular.
16:55And she's going to nick that artery.
16:56No, she's not.
16:57She's not nicking anything.
16:58You got this, Sam.
17:03Is it on my face?
17:04No.
17:07No, no, no.
17:09Why don't you go take a couple, okay?
17:11Five, ten, fifteen, whatever you need.
17:14Keep going.
17:16And she did it.
17:19And only one person wasn't psyched for her.
17:22Hey, Blake.
17:24Just a little advice.
17:26You can't keep alienating everyone, okay?
17:28This job is really rough.
17:30You're going to need people.
17:31Well, I'm not a kid like them, so don't worry about me.
17:34I'll be fine.
17:35Not if nobody has your back.
17:36Trust me.
17:38Got to go.
17:43That's why I kept your patient here.
17:46I'm sorry, what?
17:48To keep you here.
17:51You needed a reminder of how very good you are at what you do.
17:55Getting her through that procedure.
17:57That inspiring nonsense you just said to that gorgeous young man.
18:01I can't do that.
18:04I want you to come back.
18:07Are you messing with me?
18:08No.
18:10Come back.
18:12Make a difference.
18:14At least give it some thought.
18:19Dr. Dorian.
18:21Can I talk to you?
18:25I'm about to go into surgery.
18:26What the hell are you guys doing?
18:27All right, Tashana.
18:28Tell them what you told me.
18:29Well, Dr. Turk, the reason I chose this hospital was because of you.
18:34Hey, all I kept hearing was how great Dr. Turk is.
18:37You're like the only other black surgeon in this place.
18:40Hey, the rest of them just got, like, some Coldplay on loop in the OR
18:44and say stuff like, wow, you're so articulate.
18:48I guess I just thought you'd be my guy.
18:51Great job.
18:52Now we leave so he can feel horrible about himself.
18:55No, Tashana, you stay.
18:56You're going to close.
18:57Are you good with that?
18:59Yeah, sure.
19:00Yeah, no problem.
19:08Oh, and Tashana?
19:10This brother likes Coldplay, too.
19:23I had no idea what to do about Dr. Cox's job offer, so I decided to sleep on it.
19:28Sometimes when you feel a little lost, the world gives you a sign.
19:33It's just not always a good one.
19:36What's the status?
19:37She was found unresponsive in her car.
19:39Heart attack.
19:40We're trying, but she's gone.
19:45Why couldn't you have helped us?
19:51I had seen these moments too many times.
19:54You just thought it was a stomachache.
19:56You can't get through them on your own.
20:04This wasn't your fault.
20:07Could have happened to any one of us.
20:08It would have taken me one minute to just walk out there and check on her.
20:11Now she's dead because I didn't walk outside.
20:14I should have done something.
20:23And like that, I knew what my decision was.
20:26Hey.
20:28What are you still doing here?
20:29I thought you'd be long gone by now.
20:31I'll take the job.
20:33Oh, I'm quite glad.
20:35Perry, working alongside you will be one of the great honors of my life.
20:39I should have been clear.
20:40You're not going to be working with me.
20:42You're going to be me.
20:45You're the new chief of medicine.
20:48What?
20:49No.
20:50I can't be you.
20:52You're right.
20:54Just be you.
20:56This particular world has passed me by.
21:00You're the only one I trust to do better and try harder.
21:04Perry, I really don't think I...
21:06J.D., those interns need somebody to do for them.
21:10What I did for you.
21:12Okay?
21:15Dr. Park really wanted this job.
21:17And his hatred for you is going to burn quite hot.
21:21And that thought...
21:25Will keep me warm at night.
21:31I have never been a boss.
21:33I have never even run a lemonade stand.
21:36But one thing's for sure.
21:38I can't do this all on my own.
21:48You know, I read in the New York Times that there's such a male loneliness epidemic
21:53that some guys are actually calling their friends at night to say goodnight.
21:56That's crazy.
21:59I know.
22:01Do you think it would be cool...
22:03Not a shot in the dark.
22:04I don't want to do it either.
22:05Yeah.
22:07Maybe once a week.
22:10Wednesday it is.
22:18Bye-bye.
22:19Bye-bye.
22:22Bye-bye.
22:24Bye-bye.
22:24Bye-bye.
22:25Bye-bye.
22:26Bye-bye.
22:27Bye-bye.
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