- 9 hours ago
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She's Not Homeless, She's Healer Goddess! #FullMovie
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Healer goddess, hear my plea.
00:00:03Please save my child.
00:00:21Rod of a sepulis.
00:00:30Rod of a sepulis.
00:00:41Rejuvenate.
00:00:50Graze, she is the healer goddess.
00:00:53No, please.
00:00:55Don't call me that.
00:00:57I'm just glad I could help.
00:01:03Here you go, miss.
00:01:07Why be weighed down by a throne when I can live amongst the common people and help those the most
00:01:11in need?
00:01:24You must be rushing off to go find your jewels, because only a sackless coward would hit a puppy and
00:01:29run!
00:01:32Aw, it's okay, little guy.
00:01:36I'll fix you right up.
00:01:42Right rewrites the wrong.
00:01:46We're juvenile.
00:01:49We're juvenile.
00:01:51See?
00:01:52Good as the day you can kicking out of your mother's womb.
00:01:57Come on, Cleo!
00:01:58Let's go!
00:02:03Oh!
00:02:05Whoa-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!
00:02:08Whoa-ho-ho-ho!
00:02:10Whoa-ho-ho-ho!
00:02:11Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
00:02:14Hold on, continue, sir!
00:02:15Please. My brother's been in a coma the last two years.
00:02:19We have no idea what the illness is.
00:02:21If anyone can help cure him, we will pay you handsomely.
00:02:24Be Lysander Armstrong.
00:02:26His military family basically owns the entire global stock market.
00:02:30He's so hot.
00:02:32Does he come with the money?
00:02:33Yes. He'll even marry you if you can cure him.
00:02:36Money, fame, power. It's all yours.
00:02:44Are we still moving forward, Ms. Trixie?
00:02:46Yes. Give the presidential contract to Marissa.
00:02:50Oh, I have another call coming in.
00:02:53Grandma!
00:02:54I'm dying! Save me, Trixie!
00:02:58Grandma?
00:03:00Grandma.
00:03:01When are you getting married? I'm already a hundred years old.
00:03:05I'm going to keep you healthy forever, Grandma.
00:03:07And Butch is still on deployment.
00:03:09So, that's why I haven't been married yet?
00:03:14Oh, but why marry a vegetable when I can bang a younger stud like you?
00:03:20We're talking about my brother's life. I don't have time for jokes.
00:03:25No!
00:03:34Please go feed your dog, miss. Don't let it starve like you.
00:03:37Oh, kind stranger, let me repay you by granting you a wish.
00:03:41Grant me a wish?
00:03:42Because you can barely feed yourself.
00:03:44The downfall of humanity.
00:03:46It all starts with the loss of faith.
00:03:49What?
00:03:50Jesus, this is giving me a migraine.
00:03:53Are you telling me to pray to God because we've been doing that?
00:03:56I'm telling you to have some faith in me.
00:03:59Okay.
00:04:00Uh, I wish for you to cure my brother's illness.
00:04:04Can you do that?
00:04:05I can topple mountains and make a king out of a frog if I wanted to.
00:04:09Cleo, stay right here for a second.
00:04:11Don't go too far, Cleo.
00:04:16Hold still.
00:04:24My migraine's gone.
00:04:25Okay, then let's go.
00:04:27If you can cure my brother, he'll even marry you.
00:04:29Come on.
00:04:30Come on.
00:04:31Oh!
00:04:45How is he?
00:04:46What is the diagnosis?
00:04:48Remember, you will not marry him unless you cure him.
00:04:51I'm sorry.
00:04:51I don't know what this is.
00:04:53Aren't you the queen of medicine?
00:04:55You're supposed to be one of the best.
00:04:56Don't worry, General.
00:04:57I'm the angel herbalist, and I have mastered all healing methods of the East.
00:05:03I can detect what condition your son has with just one needle.
00:05:23I have no clue what this is.
00:05:27Oh, it looks like the angel herbalist doesn't live up to her name after all.
00:05:33That's why we saved the best for last.
00:05:35Me, the witch doctor.
00:05:37I'll save your son, Lysander.
00:05:49He's not budging.
00:05:50There's no movement.
00:05:51Truly, I have saved thousands of patients all over the world, but I don't know what this
00:05:57is.
00:05:58Lord, I've scoured the earth for the best doctors.
00:06:01They've tried all these methods, and they've all failed.
00:06:04If we can't save him, there's only one person who can.
00:06:10Who?
00:06:13The goddess of healing.
00:06:17Wait a second.
00:06:18You're not talking about the legendary goddess healing.
00:06:21That's correct.
00:06:22Her right rewrites the rond, and her left leaves the bereft.
00:06:27That's her motto.
00:06:28It's what makes her a sage amongst mortals.
00:06:31We are nothing compared to her.
00:06:34She is eccentric and elusive.
00:06:37No one has ever seen her before.
00:06:39If this legendary healer is the only one that can truly save my son, I don't care if I go
00:06:44bankrupt.
00:06:46I will find her.
00:06:47James, come.
00:06:49Put out a voucher.
00:06:50To the entire world.
00:06:52Whoever finds the goddess healer will get the five million dollars.
00:06:56There's no need.
00:07:11I'll save your son.
00:07:14Who the hell is she?
00:07:15Dad, she says she can cure Lysander.
00:07:17She's gonna save your brother?
00:07:19Don't be ridiculous.
00:07:21How can this shit-stained hobo cure your brother?
00:07:24Exactly.
00:07:25Oh my god, the unemployed are getting crazier and crazier.
00:07:28She's trying to scam her way into marrying the rich.
00:07:32Ew!
00:07:33She even brought a filthy dog with her.
00:07:35I bet it has fleas.
00:07:37That flea-infested, dirty thing is your companion.
00:07:41Don't try to steal Lysander Armstrong from us.
00:07:48Don't touch him.
00:07:51They say don't judge a book by its cover, but I can see from all your faces that you've failed.
00:07:57So step aside.
00:07:58I'll take it from here.
00:08:00Could you hold this?
00:08:01Oh, you're not gonna touch my son.
00:08:04I'm the richest tycoon in this country and a former general.
00:08:09I know a gold-digging whore when I see one.
00:08:11I bet she's only here because giving blowjobs on the street corners wasn't paying enough cash.
00:08:17Who knows what an unskilled, poor girl like her would do for some.
00:08:22A skinny-ass beggar trying to take advantage of Lysander Armstrong when he's unconscious?
00:08:28Ew!
00:08:29Disgusting.
00:08:30Go back to being a prostitute.
00:08:32Security!
00:08:33Get this STD-infested peasant out of here now.
00:08:36Let's go.
00:08:37If you throw me out, you're tossing away your son's last chance at life.
00:08:44Sir, we are at our wit's end trying to find a cure for Master Lysander and to no avail.
00:08:49Maybe we should give her a try?
00:08:52You can always deal with her later if she turns out to be a fraud.
00:08:55All right, I'll give you a shot.
00:08:58But I warn you, if you fail, I'll have your and your dog's head mounted on my wall.
00:09:04Is that any way to ask for help?
00:09:07You'd be blessed to have me.
00:09:09And I'm only here to repay your younger son's kindness.
00:09:12But since I'm not welcome here, I'll leave.
00:09:17Devin, come find me when you have a different wish.
00:09:20No, it's Trixie.
00:09:22My brother is a hero to me.
00:09:23I can't lose him.
00:09:26Well, if he's a hero to you, then that means he must be a good person.
00:09:32My brother is a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack.
00:09:36Also, he's great with puppies.
00:09:37He'd make a great husband.
00:09:41Who says I want to marry him?
00:09:43As if the number one hottest 30 under 30 would even dream of marrying a penniless bum like you.
00:09:50Only a lunatic would be crazy enough to marry her.
00:09:52I mean, look at her.
00:09:54Even if she cleaned herself up, you couldn't find an ounce of femininity on her.
00:09:58Only those cut from the lowest ranks were bigger over such trivial matters.
00:10:03Continue wasting your time.
00:10:05But I'm saving this patient.
00:10:17Oh, okay.
00:10:20What's happening?
00:10:21What are we doing?
00:10:33What the hell are you doing?
00:10:36I knew she was a perv!
00:10:38She's definitely trying to steal Lysander from us.
00:10:41Do you all not know that sweat can tell you everything that's medically wrong with a patient?
00:10:44Are you insane?
00:10:45Security, smash her face in for licking my son.
00:10:49He's born with congenital heart disease, has a peanut allergy, and the condition he has is called endogenic cryomorphie.
00:10:57Yeah, right.
00:10:58I mean, no way you got all that just from licking him.
00:11:01Oh, okay.
00:11:01I've studied every disease known to man, right?
00:11:04I even have the badge of universal medicine right here.
00:11:08And I've never heard of endo-cryo-what-what?
00:11:15But this is worth nothing when I have the real thing right here.
00:11:25What?
00:11:26What?
00:11:27So you think that this crummy walking stick of yours is what, the rod of a sepulius?
00:11:33Why don't you go back to the homeless asylum where you came from if you're going to be this delusional?
00:11:38I agree.
00:11:38I mean, even if she does solve this medical mystery, what is the point as of doctors who have studied
00:11:44for years?
00:11:45We are all certified.
00:11:47But Lysander does have congenital heart disease.
00:11:51She's right about everything.
00:11:55Yeah, but if she just throws out a bunch of fake diagnoses, one of them is bound to be right.
00:12:00And again, there is no such thing as endo-cryo-what-what?
00:12:03Endogenic cryomorphie.
00:12:05Oh.
00:12:05And of course none of you have heard of it.
00:12:07Because I just discovered it.
00:12:10This condition only affects those with both CHD and a peanut allergy.
00:12:14The chances are a billion to one.
00:12:16A hundred times rarer than winning the lottery.
00:12:18But lucky for you all, you've hit the jackpot by finding me.
00:12:23What a bunch of baloney.
00:12:25I mean, you wouldn't be homeless if you were actually any good.
00:12:30Precisely.
00:12:30You are just a scamming prostitute.
00:12:33You don't compare to meet us who actually studied real medicine.
00:12:38I bet you were too poor to go to real medical school.
00:12:42Oh, so she went to the super circus instead.
00:12:45And now she's here putting on this clown show coming up with fake diseases,
00:12:50which mean nothing if you can't wake him up.
00:12:53Is that supposed to be a challenge?
00:12:55Oh, yeah.
00:12:57If you three incompetent doormats want to show me up,
00:13:01I think you all should grow parts of your brain back.
00:13:04Which, by the way, that condition is called an encephaly.
00:13:08What is that supposed to mean?
00:13:09It means you're being schooled by me,
00:13:11and I'm about to walk all over your medical licensees.
00:13:15Then let's have a bet.
00:13:17If you can't heal him,
00:13:20we'll break your hands.
00:13:23And then you can't pretend to have healing hands anymore.
00:13:29These hands have saved more lives than all three of you combined.
00:13:33You're that desperate to get rid of your competition, huh?
00:13:37Miss Trixie, don't risk your hands for them.
00:13:40There's too many lives at stake.
00:13:44Don't worry.
00:13:45I got this.
00:13:48It's a deal.
00:13:50I'll save Lysander Armstrong.
00:13:52No one is dying on my watch.
00:14:00Lysander Armstrong has been in a vegetative state for two years.
00:14:08Are you stopping me because you're scared I'd actually succeed?
00:14:11Homeless or not, if you save my son, I'll give you everything.
00:14:23I'll even have Lysander, my heir, marry you.
00:14:26I'm not doing this for the money or for a wealthy husband.
00:14:29I just believe in helping good people and doing the right thing.
00:14:34Prepare a jacuzzi set at exactly 113 degrees Fahrenheit.
00:14:37Wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:14:38What for?
00:14:39Don't listen to her.
00:14:41She probably stinks so bad that she just wants a bath
00:14:44to wash the homeless stench off of her.
00:14:46Firstly, this is called greatness.
00:14:50Secondly, even if you drown yourself in plastic surgery,
00:14:53you couldn't get rid of your own ugly moral character.
00:14:57What?
00:14:58Did you just call me?
00:15:01There's a man's life at stake here,
00:15:04and you're standing in my way.
00:15:06Don't don the mantle of doctor when you're only capable of harm.
00:15:10Now stop getting in my way,
00:15:12or I promise you,
00:15:14you will be bubbling at the mouth very soon.
00:15:16Oh, yeah?
00:15:17Hey, you want to see real pain?
00:15:18Where's the dog?
00:15:20Well, put down the dog!
00:15:21With pleasure.
00:15:44You don't deserve to call yourself a doctor.
00:15:50She's been poisoned!
00:15:52It was her!
00:15:54Do you see any poison on me?
00:15:56Medicine in the right hands can save lives,
00:15:59but in the wrong hands,
00:16:01it becomes nothing but poison.
00:16:02This bitch isn't good enough
00:16:04to take down the queen of medicine!
00:16:06Do you have one of your antidotes on you?
00:16:07Of course.
00:16:09I've saved entire civilizations with my antidotes.
00:16:12If I want to save someone,
00:16:14even the Grim Reaper can't stop me.
00:16:32Why is she spitting blood?
00:16:34This wasn't supposed to happen!
00:16:35I thought you said even the Grim Reaper can't get in your way.
00:16:38Angel herbalist.
00:16:40This is what I call malpractice.
00:16:44This isn't fatal.
00:16:45She'll live.
00:16:46But she deserves a little punishment.
00:16:48Well, where's the jacuzzi I asked for?
00:16:51Jacuzzi is ready?
00:16:52Right this way.
00:16:53Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:16:54What the hell is going on?
00:16:56You say you want your son to live on
00:16:57to give you tons of grandchildren, don't you?
00:17:00Then stop getting in my way.
00:17:02Every second counts.
00:17:05Let's go for our dip, shall we?
00:17:10General Armstrong,
00:17:12your family is the richest and most powerful in the nation.
00:17:15Are you really going to let this hobo slut touch your son?
00:17:19Hold on.
00:17:20You two are going in there alone?
00:17:23If you don't want these drooling vultures
00:17:25to see your son naked,
00:17:27then sure, invite everyone in.
00:17:30All right.
00:17:31But I warn you,
00:17:32no funny business.
00:17:34Let's go.
00:18:35You really shouldn't leave your precious son in there with that homeless conwoman, General Armstrong.
00:18:40Exactly.
00:18:41What if she gets pregnant by him?
00:18:43She could blackmail you for millions.
00:18:47That's what I would do if I was that poor.
00:18:49And then the Armstrong family will be the laughingstock of the nation.
00:18:52Held for ransom by a homeless woman.
00:18:56Daddy, you can't seriously be listening to that.
00:18:58We have to have faith.
00:19:00Where did you actually find this little life?
00:19:03Uh, on the streets?
00:19:07Are you shitting me?
00:19:09You found this bum on the streets?
00:19:11Are you nuts?
00:19:12You don't know her.
00:19:13You don't know her background.
00:19:14She could be a psychotic murder.
00:19:16That is it, General.
00:19:17You have to go in and stop this now.
00:19:19You're right.
00:19:19That's it.
00:19:20I'm shutting down this clown show right now.
00:19:22James, let's go.
00:19:23Yes, sir.
00:19:34I told you all to stay out.
00:19:42This is a critical moment for you.
00:19:44We can't be interrupted.
00:19:45Otherwise, we both die.
00:19:51I'm not going to let this homeless hoochie mama trap my son.
00:19:57I'm going to save him myself.
00:19:59No.
00:20:03You see that, General?
00:20:04This isn't just a gull-dicking con woman.
00:20:07This is a witchcraft.
00:20:10I know what this is.
00:20:11This is the dark witch.
00:20:13I've heard of her.
00:20:14She uses her dark magic to steal the hearts of young, handsome men, and then she eats them alive.
00:20:20I'm going to kill that bitch before she takes my son.
00:20:24James, get the SWAT team.
00:20:26Yes, sir.
00:20:30Here we gain consciousness.
00:20:42Help me.
00:20:43I just want to...
00:20:48Something's wrong.
00:20:52You were drunk with an aphrodisiac.
00:20:55Lysander Armstrong and his fortune will soon be mine.
00:21:00That's the only thing I'm saving you from.
00:21:09Sir?
00:21:10The SWAT team is here.
00:21:12Captain Morales.
00:21:15My son is trapped behind there with a devious, man-eating witch.
00:21:20I need you to do whatever you can to tear down that door.
00:21:23Rest assured, General Armstrong.
00:21:25We'll break down that door and bury that bitch alive.
00:21:32Right.
00:21:33Rewrites the wrong.
00:21:38Human.
00:21:42Who the fuck are you?
00:21:44And why the hell are we naked?
00:21:47Good.
00:21:48You're awake.
00:21:49I'm saving you.
00:21:50Saving me?
00:21:51By baiting with me?
00:21:53Who are you?
00:21:54You're a fucking spy?
00:21:56Talk.
00:21:57I swear to God, I will have you arrested for this.
00:22:01You're the one who's trying to kiss me in your stippor.
00:22:06I will never.
00:22:07Oh, really?
00:22:21Look who's guilty now.
00:22:25Look, I don't know what the fuck this is, all right, but it is a biological fact.
00:22:29A man is attracted to a naked woman and her breasts.
00:22:34It's science, okay?
00:22:36It just means that my body is physically...
00:22:37Oh, shut up.
00:22:37It's physically...
00:22:40You're distracted, man.
00:22:42You're funny.
00:22:43And I'm a professional.
00:22:45I hear Lysander's voice.
00:22:47Captain, do something now.
00:22:48Ready!
00:22:54We're almost there.
00:22:56Aim!
00:22:58Get him, boys.
00:23:00Get him!
00:23:02Fire!
00:23:06Fire!
00:23:21Those demon cells.
00:23:23How is this possible?
00:23:25It's not even a scratch.
00:23:26I told you this is dark magic.
00:23:29Of course, your earthly bullets won't do a thing.
00:23:31No.
00:23:32I believe Miss Trixie is a good person.
00:23:34She's not the dark witch.
00:23:36Young Master Armstrong, you are too easily fooled.
00:23:40This homeless psycho doesn't even have the skills to make a living.
00:23:44How is she going to save someone else's life?
00:23:46That's right.
00:23:47The Queen Angel and I are already the top female doctors in the world.
00:23:51If we can't save him, no one can.
00:23:53Except for the goddess healer.
00:23:55Think about it.
00:23:56We heard Lysander's voice.
00:23:58He's been in a coma for two years.
00:23:59Miss Trixie must have woken him up.
00:24:01You're right.
00:24:02This homeless girl is maybe the goddess.
00:24:07Maybe this homeless girl is really the goddess.
00:24:10No!
00:24:11No!
00:24:12Absolutely not.
00:24:13There is no way this hobo girl is better than us.
00:24:16How could you know for sure?
00:24:18Right now, what we need to do is not interrupt Miss Trixie.
00:24:21You're wrong, sir!
00:24:22This homeless snake is using the forbidden techniques on Master Lysander.
00:24:27It's called borderline revival.
00:24:30She uses torturous pain to wake the patient.
00:24:33But only temporarily.
00:24:34It's a trick to pull the wool over your eyes and ears.
00:24:39That means my son is in tremendous pain.
00:24:42I'm going to ask you two to do whatever you can to kill that antler rod bearing witch.
00:24:48My son doesn't deserve this.
00:24:49He is dying right now, naked in a jacuzzi with a smelly vagrant.
00:24:54Then it looks like it's up to me.
00:24:56The witch doctor.
00:24:58Only I know the right techniques to take her down.
00:25:02My son's life is in your hands.
00:25:04You heal him, I will give you whatever your heart desires.
00:25:09I don't know who you are, but there is no way I am letting you rip my golden bachelor away
00:25:14from me.
00:25:17This is it.
00:25:18The finishing touch.
00:25:19The witch, I must now give you the kiss of life.
00:25:23So we can both survive.
00:25:43It's poison gas.
00:25:45The poison gas will smoke them out and end her torture over Master Lysander.
00:25:50Poison gas?
00:25:51My son is in there.
00:25:53You're jeopardizing his life as well.
00:25:55No, don't worry, General.
00:25:57Gold diggers like her only care about themselves.
00:26:00Soon, she'll come out crying to mommy.
00:26:03Then we can reverse the poison on your son.
00:26:05And then he can marry one of us.
00:26:08They really won't stop until they get both of us killed.
00:26:13I knew they promised you that I'd save you.
00:26:17It's now or never.
00:26:30What the hell are they doing in there?
00:26:32It's been over ten minutes.
00:26:34Wait a second.
00:26:35You don't think that they're...
00:26:37You!
00:26:38You suffocated my brother and Miss Trixie in there!
00:26:40Don't point your fingers at me!
00:26:42If your brother's dead, it's because of that homeless gold digger.
00:26:46Oh my God.
00:26:47Yeah?
00:26:47She's the one who sealed the door shut.
00:26:49I mean, she probably locked themselves in there on accident.
00:26:53Miss Trixie wouldn't have to do that if you weren't trying to sabotage her from saving my brother.
00:26:57This is taking way too long.
00:27:00Captain Morales, it's time to get out.
00:27:02The big guns.
00:27:04These bazookas can flatten even a bomb shelter.
00:27:08Bazooka.
00:27:08She won't be able to hide even if she's the devil himself.
00:27:11Crap.
00:27:12Oh my God.
00:27:13Get back, sucker.
00:27:15Ready.
00:27:16Aim!
00:27:17Oh shit.
00:27:22Quit your whining and stand down.
00:27:36The parasite's been extracted.
00:27:38Shoot her dead now.
00:27:39Do I need to fix your hearing too?
00:27:42I said stand down.
00:27:45Don't listen to her.
00:27:46She's a fraud.
00:27:47A termite to the field of medicine.
00:27:49I just saved this man that otherwise would have died in your care.
00:27:53If I'm a termite, then you're worse than a disease spreading tick.
00:27:58Wait a second.
00:27:59Are you saying you cured my son?
00:28:01He'll wake in just a moment.
00:28:02You can see for yourself.
00:28:04Well, now you're just asking to be exposed.
00:28:07That is it.
00:28:08No more stalling, General.
00:28:10If you won't punish her, I will.
00:28:15Don't hurt her.
00:28:21He's a cure.
00:28:28His pulse is regular.
00:28:30In fact, it's never been better.
00:28:35There's no sign of illness, infection, or disease.
00:28:45Miss Trixie did it, Dad.
00:28:48Lysander's warm again.
00:28:49He's not cold and pale like before.
00:28:51And his heart is strong.
00:28:52Come, feel it.
00:28:55I saved my son.
00:28:58Next time, don't go seeking medical advice from those with ill will.
00:29:02Your son would have otherwise died by their greedy and unskilled hands.
00:29:06I've learned my lesson.
00:29:08I will not let these two nutjobs ever practice their voodoo voodoo magic again.
00:29:12Wait, wait.
00:29:13No, no.
00:29:14There is only one person in the world who is more skilled in the field of medicine than the queen,
00:29:19Angel, and I.
00:29:23The goddess healer.
00:29:27Could you really be the goddess of healing?
00:29:30But rumor has it that the goddess of healing is well over 100 years old, and you don't look a
00:29:36day after 20.
00:29:38It doesn't matter who I am.
00:29:39What matters is that the patient is healthy again.
00:29:42Devon, I've repaid your kindness by fulfilling your wish of saving your brother.
00:29:46Take care.
00:29:48No, wait.
00:29:49Miss Trixie, we still haven't fulfilled our promise to you yet.
00:29:52He's right.
00:29:53We are men of our words, and as I promised you, my heir, Lysander, would take you as a wife
00:29:58if you cured him, and you did just that.
00:30:00Of course, you're welcome to marry me instead.
00:30:03Oh, I really appreciate it, but I'm sorry.
00:30:08I, I'm already engaged.
00:30:13Already engaged?
00:30:15I am.
00:30:15I've been patiently awaiting his return from deployment for the last three years, and he's coming back today.
00:30:21But don't be disappointed.
00:30:23Really, I'm no one special.
00:30:26I just got lucky with your brother.
00:30:28Some guru taught me that spa water can cure all kinds of ailments.
00:30:31But you're still Lysander's savior.
00:30:33Please, let me give you what I promised.
00:30:35Take the gold.
00:30:36No, really.
00:30:38I don't need anything.
00:30:40I just believe in doing good in the world.
00:30:46Trixie, it's your fiance.
00:30:48He's back, and he says he's breaking up with you.
00:30:53I must go.
00:31:00Hobo close.
00:31:02Halo glow.
00:31:04I bet the goddess healer is just like Miss Trixie.
00:31:06It was just dumb luck.
00:31:09She's even dumber for not accepting his marriage proposal.
00:31:12She could have been the richest woman in the world, marrying the hottest, most powerful bachelor around.
00:31:20I'm going to marry that homeless woman.
00:31:26Oh, my God.
00:31:28I mean, I don't know about that homeless bimbo, but this is godly.
00:31:33No, no, no, no, Lysander.
00:31:36My syndrome is not what's supposed to be mine.
00:31:40I'd so much rather share him with you than let that panty-like, ugly bitch have him.
00:31:45You two nut jobs are a disgrace to your profession.
00:31:48Take these two weirdos out of here and revoke their licenses.
00:31:51No.
00:31:52We're not brides.
00:31:53No, she's just better than us.
00:31:56Oh, my God.
00:31:58Oh, my God.
00:32:00We were truly blessed to have Miss Trixie here, huh?
00:32:03She's no average Jane.
00:32:05No, she isn't.
00:32:05She said it was just dumb luck.
00:32:07But if she truly had these special skills, why did she wear that shit-stained dress and had an impeccable
00:32:13-looking doll?
00:32:14But think about the impenetrable walls.
00:32:16No normal person could have done that.
00:32:18Goddess or not, homeless or not, I don't care.
00:32:21I have never met a woman like that.
00:32:23I have to find her.
00:32:24I have to make her my life.
00:32:25She won my heart over, too.
00:32:27But if my bestest big bro wants her, I'll help you find her.
00:32:31All right, listen.
00:32:32I need help finding three wedding gifts.
00:32:39I'm dumping Trixie, so I want you, your granddaughters, filthy things, out of my house now.
00:32:47Trixie paid for this house.
00:32:49She waited for you for three years.
00:32:53She was dumb enough to put my name on the lease.
00:32:55And I'm upgrading for a better girlfriend now.
00:32:57One with some serious fuck you money.
00:32:59So get lost.
00:33:01Who gave you permission to bark like a rabbit hyena in my house?
00:33:10Grandma.
00:33:12Beatrice, Trixie, Amore.
00:33:15I've been dying to throw this in your face.
00:33:17I'm dumping you for your best friend, Marissa.
00:33:21In fact, the wedding's tomorrow.
00:33:24So sign over to the house now.
00:33:31You gave me this ring and asked me to wait.
00:33:34And I did.
00:33:36For three years while you were deployed.
00:33:38Yet you cheat on me with my best friend.
00:33:41And now you're trying to swindle my home?
00:33:44Do you have no shame?
00:33:46We were together for three years and it was a complete waste of my life
00:33:50when I could have been with a loaded girl like Marissa.
00:33:57That's how much you would owe me if I was in the rent-a-boyfriend business.
00:34:03I see you're fulfilling your highest aspirations of being a low-grade male prostitute.
00:34:11Oh yeah?
00:34:13Well, Marissa
00:34:15is so much better than you.
00:34:17She grew up even poorer than you.
00:34:20And now, she's the CEO of an entire corporation.
00:34:25You!
00:34:26Oh!
00:34:27And you?
00:34:29You're still nothing.
00:34:31So you think she's an upgrade?
00:34:34Of course she's an upgrade.
00:34:36Look what she got me for my engagement.
00:34:39Oops.
00:34:41Yeah.
00:34:41That's maybe worth one millionth the presidential contract I gave her.
00:34:51You gave her the presidential contract?
00:34:54I certainly did.
00:34:55In fact, Marissa, you and your dimwit brother only have everything you have all thanks to me.
00:35:07Oh, I think she's losing it, bro.
00:35:09That breakup must have hit her hard.
00:35:12You two are the ungrateful, cheating scum here.
00:35:16My granddaughter supported you and your entire family for three years while you were gone.
00:35:22How dare you insult her?
00:35:25It's okay, Grandma.
00:35:26Let's not stoop to that level.
00:35:29Poor Edna.
00:35:30She still doesn't know what you're doing out there on the streets, huh?
00:35:33What is he talking about, Jersey?
00:35:35Show her, Bob.
00:35:41This is how embarrassingly useless your granddaughter is.
00:35:44She didn't purchase this house on her own.
00:35:46She was begging on the street for money.
00:35:50I can't be caught with a piss-poor nobody like you.
00:35:53Even if you got no game, I got street cred I got off keep.
00:35:57You dig?
00:35:57The word you're looking for is dignity.
00:36:00And you're one to speak, cheater.
00:36:04Is this true, Trixie?
00:36:09I've been broadening my horizons, Grandma.
00:36:11I want to see how regular, everyday people live so that I can help them.
00:36:16Of course, those without substance underneath would never understand that.
00:36:21What is that supposed to mean?
00:36:22It means the new girlfriend you think is an upgrade is actually a downgrade.
00:36:31Enough bullshitting already.
00:36:32Just sign the damn papers and we can each get on with our lives.
00:36:48At your wedding, I will.
00:36:50What?
00:36:51If you won't do good by me of breaking things off before two-timing me with my best friend,
00:36:56why should I do good by you?
00:36:58I'll give you my John Hancock at your wedding as a charity to you.
00:37:04Fucking bitch!
00:37:05You better keep your word.
00:37:07Oh, that's rich.
00:37:09After tomorrow, you will never feel so rich ever again.
00:37:12Do remember that.
00:37:20Trixie, Marissa's a millionaire now.
00:37:23They'll destroy you if you show even so much as a hair at their wedding.
00:37:27Grandma, I have to confess something to you.
00:37:30I've secretly amassed a fortune worth trillions.
00:37:34Trillions?
00:37:36That would make you the richest person on the planet.
00:37:41It's because of the healing hands I inherited from Asseplius, the god of healing.
00:37:46I've saved several world leaders with these hands.
00:37:50That's how I was able to give Marissa the presidential contract and become the goddess healer.
00:37:55It makes me angrier hearing her name knowing how she betrayed you.
00:37:59But please, Trixie dear, I know it must have broken your heart,
00:38:04but embellishing your worth and who you are, it will only delay the healing process.
00:38:11You don't have to believe me just yet.
00:38:13After we lost mom and dad because we didn't have the money for their medical pills.
00:38:18I vowed that I would do everything I can to serve those in need.
00:38:23That's why I'm taking everything back from Butch and I'm giving it back to charity.
00:38:26You've always had an angel's heart.
00:38:29I'm certain you will meet someone who will treat you right.
00:38:32who actually deserves you.
00:38:35You will see tomorrow, Grandma.
00:38:38Oh, yeah.
00:38:41You're stuck.
00:38:44You said Trixie's crashing my wedding?
00:38:47She was bullying us too, Sasa.
00:38:49She's probably trying to extort you now that she knows you're rich as fuck.
00:38:54When nobody steps on a snake, the snake bites back hard.
00:38:58So let her come and embarrass herself.
00:39:00Yeah.
00:39:01You mean...
00:39:04We broadcast that video of me?
00:39:09Yes.
00:39:10Her cavewoman stick, the 19th century tin can.
00:39:13She'll prop me up higher on my pedestal and the whole world sees her in her homeless mess
00:39:17against my presidential glow up.
00:39:20Let's turn this party into her funeral.
00:39:29There he is.
00:39:31Welcome home, brother.
00:39:34Welcome home, General!
00:39:37Sir, the homeless woman who saved you, Miss Trixie,
00:39:40this is the file of her ex, Butch Tanner.
00:39:43He served with your regiment in the Marines.
00:39:45You mean the Butch Tanner that can barely carry supplies?
00:39:47Well, she's been providing for him and his entire family while he's been deployed overseas, sir.
00:39:51So she waited for him for years, and then he betrayed her.
00:39:55Fucking coward.
00:39:56According to intel, she's planning to bring it down on them at their wedding.
00:39:59Then we should join her.
00:40:01Men, I'm only alive today because of that virtuous woman and her incredible power that saved my life.
00:40:07So she needs our support.
00:40:08Will you join me in protecting her?
00:40:10Yes, sir!
00:40:11We will allow our lives to protect her, sir!
00:40:14Then let's roll.
00:40:29Welcome, everyone, to my wedding.
00:40:32Today is a very special day for me and Butch.
00:40:34Not only are we getting married, but in just one hour, my company will be receiving the presidential contract,
00:40:39allowing my biomedical company to go public.
00:40:46Congratulations on the contract once again, Mrs.
00:40:49Wakeham.
00:40:50Stowe, Butch is taking my last name.
00:40:52Oh, and please don't be so uptight, Secretary Cho.
00:40:55You are the secretary of the entire U.S. Health Department, but this is a partay after all.
00:41:00I see some of the most important people in the nation have also arrived to celebrate you.
00:41:07The U.S. president will also be arriving soon to give you the contract herself.
00:41:12It's an honor.
00:41:13And that's why Sasa is the best wife a man could ever dream of.
00:41:18We will make sure the crowd is entertained tonight.
00:41:22We'll let the wedding begin!
00:41:25Not so fast.
00:41:27The party doesn't start until I say it does.
00:41:50You two really are a match made in hell.
00:41:54So I've come to save your guests from this oncoming train wreck.
00:41:57I don't recognize it from any of our elite circles.
00:42:00Who is she?
00:42:01Um, this is our entertainment for tonight, sir.
00:42:04Just watch.
00:42:08Trixie, what are you doing here?
00:42:09This isn't the homeless shelter.
00:42:10You lost.
00:42:11I bet she's here to bum a meal off us.
00:42:13You know, being this poor.
00:42:17Me, bum a meal.
00:42:18So, have you forgotten that it was I who bankrolled you two for the last three years?
00:42:23And what evidence do you have of that?
00:42:25Look at me, then go look at yourself in the mirror.
00:42:27I'm a millionaire CEO.
00:42:30Even the first woman president will be here any second now to congratulate me.
00:42:33And you're nothing but a washed up sewer rat.
00:42:37Sasa, she's like so obsessed with me.
00:42:39She's like...
00:42:41See, everyone?
00:42:42Butch already cut ties with his ex, but she's so shameless and desperate that she'd still
00:42:48show up to my wedding to suck up to me.
00:42:51This is what poor sad girls do.
00:42:53They beg for scraps from us, the rich and glorious.
00:42:57Projecting much, Marissa?
00:42:59You might feel all high and mighty now, but don't bite the hand that feeds you.
00:43:04Especially when I'm the one who's giving you the contract.
00:43:11You giving me the contract?
00:43:14You have no skills, no education, no connection.
00:43:17So, how could you possibly have a pool to get the U.S. fucking president to give me a billion
00:43:23dollar contract?
00:43:24We both share humble beginnings, Marissa.
00:43:26And I saw potential in you.
00:43:28Even trusted you as my best friend.
00:43:31But I recognize now that greed has poisoned you.
00:43:34Don't be all sore now just because I stole your man.
00:43:37This is what us rich girls do.
00:43:40They steal from lame spinsters for fun.
00:43:43Damn right.
00:43:44You were too embarrassing for me.
00:43:47Sasa tramples you any day.
00:43:49I can say that now that I'm marrying the rich.
00:43:52Bravo.
00:43:53Self-admission of a gold digger.
00:43:55Quick, somebody put that on a memoir.
00:43:57Sasa, she's embarrassing me in front of everyone.
00:43:59You should make her stop.
00:44:00Don't listen to her, everyone.
00:44:02She's the gold digging, blood sucking leech.
00:44:04I don't even have to lift a finger and you're already embarrassing yourself in front of everyone
00:44:09for me, butch.
00:44:11You may look and sound like a man, but you're nothing but a pathetic coward.
00:44:15Okay, enough.
00:44:16You know what I always couldn't stand about you?
00:44:18Your moral posturing.
00:44:21But guess what?
00:44:22Morals are just lies to make you and girls feel better about yourselves.
00:44:26That's why no man will choose you over Marissa Trixie.
00:44:29Because I've got the material goods.
00:44:31You're just all empty talk.
00:44:33I'm not here to request to be chosen.
00:44:35Because I'm the one who's doing the choosing.
00:44:39You see this?
00:44:51Oh my god.
00:44:53Is that the billion dollar contract for Sasa?
00:44:58The one that's supposed to make us all rich as fuck?
00:45:00No, absolutely not.
00:45:02I don't believe it.
00:45:04You all sound so scared already.
00:45:06Don't worry.
00:45:06This isn't that contract.
00:45:09It's the lease to the modest home you try to swindle from me.
00:45:15See everyone?
00:45:16She's just trying to bluff us.
00:45:18But you don't even have the guts to go all the way.
00:45:20Look at her following orders.
00:45:21I asked her to sign over the lease and here she is.
00:45:24Like a good little peasant slave.
00:45:27That house is worth all her life savings.
00:45:32You want to, uh, I don't know, beg for a little treat while you're at it?
00:45:46You must understand me.
00:45:48I'm here to take back everything I've ever given you.
00:45:51I'm giving it to charity.
00:45:59Bro!
00:46:00She's gone cuckoo in the head.
00:46:02She thinks that just because she rented a pretty little dress she can pretend to be a deep pocket investment
00:46:06baddie.
00:46:06You wish you had that kind of money to just toss away, Trixie.
00:46:10It's just a drop in the bucket for me.
00:46:12Uh, I know what this is.
00:46:14You've gotten delusional.
00:46:16And you think you're Cinderella so you can just show up to a fancy party and some Prince Charming will
00:46:20scoop you into money forever?
00:46:22Well, that's not happening.
00:46:24Security!
00:46:24Lock the doors.
00:46:25This woman doesn't leave until we're through with her.
00:46:31This is where your dreams will die, bitch!
00:46:36We found Miss Trixie Lysander.
00:46:38She's being cornered by her ex and his mistress at the Wickham wedding right now.
00:46:41Butch Tanner.
00:46:42Well, he's gonna wish he died in battle after I'm done with him.
00:46:45Let's go.
00:46:50You think a few toy guns scare me, Marissa?
00:46:52I've saved plenty of people for much worse.
00:46:56Including your head of command, Butch.
00:46:59General Lysander Armstrong.
00:47:01You mean the legendary war hero?
00:47:03He's been in a coma for years after he saved the nation from a terrorist attack.
00:47:07You're an unskilled, unemployed, ugly leech.
00:47:11So how could you possibly have this magical ability to heal someone like General Lysander Armstrong?
00:47:17No one here is gonna believe you.
00:47:18If you really cured the incurable general, then Sasa is the fucking Virgin Mary.
00:47:23And she's not.
00:47:25You're just asking to be humiliated, Trixie.
00:47:28Show them, Butch.
00:47:34See for yourselves, everyone.
00:47:37Trixie's just a freeloading beggar.
00:47:42She won't leave me and Marissa alone, because we're rich as fuck now.
00:47:46I'm a major in the Marines.
00:47:48Sasa, she has a billion dollar biomedical contract with the military.
00:47:54Approved by the first female president of the United States herself, bitch.
00:47:59How despicable.
00:48:00She's just trying to leech off you like a parasitic gold digger.
00:48:04Get out of here.
00:48:05No one wants to marry you.
00:48:06No free meals for the poor.
00:48:08Do you see this, Trixie?
00:48:10This is high society.
00:48:12So you're either born on a silver spoon, or you're as accomplished as me to be here.
00:48:16Maybe if you do some serious dick-sucking here, maybe someone will drop a couple bucks in your tin can.
00:48:25I already have everything one can dream of.
00:48:28But I valued our friendship, Marissa.
00:48:30Which is why I came here to give you a second chance.
00:48:32To see if you'd apologize and admit to your backstabbing.
00:48:35But no.
00:48:37You stooped so low, it disgusts me.
00:48:40Nothing is more disgusting than you standing on street corners like a bum.
00:48:45And who knows, if you've already started offering sexual services.
00:48:50Well then, why don't you get on your knees for me, Trixie?
00:48:54My brother will never take you back.
00:48:57No man will marry an embarrassment like you.
00:49:00But make me happy?
00:49:01And I might consider making you my personal prostitute.
00:49:15How dare you hit my brother?
00:49:17I'm never letting you leave here alive.
00:49:20Please, boss, I'd do something else.
00:49:22Don't worry, my dear.
00:49:24After I'm done with you, Trixie, not even the goddess of healing will be able to save you.
00:49:29Oh, is that so?
00:49:32Security!
00:49:34Get down on your knees and give Bob one hell of a blowjob in front of everybody here,
00:49:40or I'll pop so many holes in you, the men here won't know which one to fuck.
00:49:44I don't need to be the goddess of anything to punish you.
00:49:47Any of the powerful leaders I've saved before could crush you before you even touch me.
00:49:52Dream on!
00:49:54You wish General Lysander scooped you off your feet, but you weren't good enough for me.
00:49:58You're definitely not good enough for him.
00:50:00Enough!
00:50:02You're souring my party, so you either get the fuck out, or I'm gonna shoot you.
00:50:08On the count of three!
00:50:10I think I quite like it here.
00:50:11Two!
00:50:12Two!
00:50:22Mmm.
00:50:23This wine is so delicious.
00:50:26One!
00:50:27Shoot!
00:50:30Nobody is laying a hand on my future wife.
00:50:39It's...
00:50:40It's...
00:50:50Who the hell is this?
00:50:55I'm sorry that I'm late.
00:50:57Did they hurt you?
00:50:58No, I'm fine.
00:51:00But, um, when did I become your future wife?
00:51:05You saved me, Trixie, remember?
00:51:08I'm a man of my word.
00:51:10They're never gonna hurt you ever again.
00:51:12Really, it was nothing.
00:51:14I saved you because you're a good man, not because I want you to owe me any favors.
00:51:24I see what this is.
00:51:26You're the one who cheated on me, Trixie.
00:51:28Look at you guys all lovey-dove.
00:51:30Don't try to pin this on her.
00:51:31Don't try to pin this on her.
00:51:32She waited for you for three years.
00:51:33This is the kind of woman of virtue that a man would die for.
00:51:36Do you hurt you?
00:51:39Don't make me laugh.
00:51:41She's probably out there giving blowjobs for cash.
00:51:43No man who, in a hundred-foot pole, would want to touch her.
00:51:47She should be happy Bob was willing to give her some.
00:51:54I see her in the marines.
00:51:57I'm a major, you know, look man.
00:52:00I know Trixie is like a, I don't know, like a seven now that she's all cleaned up.
00:52:05But don't waste your manhood on a whiny, worthless woman like that.
00:52:14A real man never talks about a woman that way.
00:52:19You're a coward.
00:52:29We don't need to fight fire with fire to deal with the likes of them.
00:52:33You're very gracious Trixie, you know that?
00:52:38You're only getting off of it because she's so kind.
00:52:40So you're going to do me the favor of never coming near her again.
00:52:42You understand?
00:52:43You want to fuck with me, you little dipshit?
00:52:45I'm a fucking major.
00:52:47You're probably lowest rank of the military grunts.
00:52:50I'll, I'll destroy you.
00:52:52Do you really not know who this is, Butch?
00:52:54I thought you were in the marines.
00:52:56What have you been doing this whole time if you don't know who this war hero is?
00:53:00He was just a supply boy.
00:53:02What?
00:53:04War hero?
00:53:06Is this all part of your plan, Trixie?
00:53:09Poor girl.
00:53:10Did you sell your house to hire this actor so you can feel better about yourself?
00:53:14A woman's worth is tied to the man she marries.
00:53:17Trixie is worthless because that guy looks like a cowboy.
00:53:22A bum girl and a pimp.
00:53:25What a pair.
00:53:27It seems like they don't know who you are since you've been out of action for so long.
00:53:31Maybe we should try to piss them off some more.
00:53:32Don't you think?
00:53:35Bring in the wedding gifts.
00:53:44What is all this?
00:53:45Trixie, listen, I know that you didn't ask for anything after you saved my life.
00:53:50But I know that we shared a moment.
00:53:55I'm not the kind of man to get close to a woman and then just disappear.
00:53:58It's not in my nature.
00:54:01I'm like somebody else here.
00:54:03Listen, Trixie, I have never met a woman like you.
00:54:10So incredible and kind and beautiful.
00:54:13So I know that you're the one for me.
00:54:18This guy's either nuts or a really, really good actor.
00:54:23Oscar worthy.
00:54:24Oscar worthy.
00:54:25No.
00:54:26First gift.
00:54:32Trixie, I know that you just lost your home.
00:54:34So I'm gifting you with your own new mansion.
00:54:38Worth 500 million dollars.
00:54:40Previously owned by Jennifer Aniston.
00:54:44Second gift.
00:54:47This contains all the rights to my entire fortune.
00:54:52Which is now yours.
00:54:53Entire fortune from a cowboy actor?
00:54:56It must be that easy.
00:54:57They already spent their entire life savings on this clown show.
00:55:00They've got nothing left.
00:55:01Why, Sander, I really don't care for any of us.
00:55:04No, look, I know.
00:55:06I know that you are the farthest thing from a material woman.
00:55:09Okay?
00:55:10Which is exactly why, well, my third gift is, um...
00:55:17Well...
00:55:30Cleo!
00:55:31Hey!
00:55:32Oh my god.
00:55:35You found my dog.
00:55:40Trixie, I'm just a man.
00:55:41But with you, it's so much more.
00:55:44Trixie Amore.
00:55:48Will you marry me?
00:55:52Do you know I can't say no to this doggo?
00:55:58Yes, I will marry you.
00:56:16Go, go, power couple.
00:56:18Woo!
00:56:19Ha ha!
00:56:19Okay, stop.
00:56:21The only power couple here is Butch and I.
00:56:25Let's remind everyone how worthless Trixie is.
00:56:29No man in their right mind would marry that embarrassing sack of scraps.
00:56:34Hey.
00:56:35I don't care if she's homeless or not, but I'm making this woman my wife,
00:56:39which means that she will be treated as and cherished as the most precious woman on earth.
00:56:44Understand?
00:56:49You still don't realize that my brother is the most powerful man on earth.
00:56:54This is General Lysander Armstrong.
00:57:03As if, like the almighty General Lysander Armstrong would propose to a homeless prostitute like Trixie.
00:57:10Yes, the Armstrong family basically controlled the global stock market.
00:57:14Lysander Armstrong would sooner marry the princess of England than someone from the lowest rank of society.
00:57:20I bet my life you're all just actors.
00:57:23Then you better enjoy your last breath.
00:57:25Come on, Lysander.
00:57:26What are we waiting for?
00:57:26Let's show them what we can do and get revenge for Trixie.
00:57:28What can a bunch of piss poor people do to us, the elites?
00:57:32Infect us with your poor people bad luck.
00:57:34She wishes she could blame her low status on bad luck.
00:57:38Truth is, she's just a useless, lazy bitchin' bum.
00:57:41She's utterly unmarriable.
00:57:46I can dispose of them in other means if you don't prefer violence.
00:57:50I'd handle them myself, but...
00:57:54I'll let you do all the heavy lifting.
00:57:56Go ahead, Lysander.
00:58:05Yes, hello, this is Lysander.
00:58:06Please bankrupt Marissa Wickham for me.
00:58:10Oh my gosh, I'm so scared.
00:58:13Anyone these days could call anyone and pretend to be on the phone.
00:58:22Uh, hello?
00:58:24Yes.
00:58:27What?
00:58:32I'm a fake rat!
00:58:41Hey, hey, hey, are you sure that was the call, Sasa?
00:58:45That was a real call?
00:58:46People don't just suddenly go bankrupt like that.
00:58:48My company's dead.
00:58:50It evaporated.
00:58:51It's in thin air.
00:58:55That's impossible.
00:58:57Who are you?
00:58:58What did you do?
00:58:59Secretary Cho, you said you're the Secretary of Health, right?
00:59:04And you yourself said that the Armstrong family owns the entire global stock market.
00:59:07Could that be how they bankrupted Miss Wickham?
00:59:11Then that means...
00:59:14You're really Lysander Armstrong, the richest and most powerful man in the country.
00:59:21Drake sees Mary the famed war hero, the man every girl wants and every man wants to be.
00:59:28Now you believe me?
00:59:29Those who do bad will always end up losing everything.
00:59:32No, there's gotta be some trick to this.
00:59:35You guys are just bums trying to extort money from us.
00:59:39Sasa, Sasa, please, please, please.
00:59:47I know why you're all over Trixie.
00:59:49Because you've been in the military for so long,
00:59:51you don't know what a real woman can do for you.
00:59:54I'll take you to my wedding chamber and I'll show you a good time.
00:59:59Do you have your hands for me or I'll have them removed for you.
01:00:07I would never be interested in a woman who's as vile and cruel and wicked as you are.
01:00:13Guess the cheater gets cheated on eventually.
01:00:18Sasa was just trying to save the company.
01:00:20I don't blame her at all.
01:00:22Your double standards are incredible.
01:00:24Okay, you don't want me, fine, but there's plenty of other efficiency.
01:00:28I can give you a room full of pageant winners, 18 years old, fresh for the taking.
01:00:40I did that so you wouldn't have to, Miss Trixie.
01:00:43Thank you, Devin.
01:00:46Marissa, not only have you backstabbed me, your best friend, by stealing my fiancee,
01:00:53but now you'd sell out other innocent girls just to get your company back?
01:00:56You're an insult to all good women out there.
01:00:59No, to all of humanity.
01:01:00So now, everything that I've ever given you to, I'm taking it all back.
01:01:07Wait, everyone, stop.
01:01:11They're imposters.
01:01:17I just got off the phone with the president and she said your contract is not getting cancelled
01:01:21because it was assigned by the goddess healer herself.
01:01:24So we won't go bankrupt?
01:01:26The goddess healer?
01:01:27You mean the eccentric and highly elusive sage in the field of medicine approved of my biomedical products?
01:01:34Yes, that's the highest honor anyone can have in the field of health and medicine.
01:01:38The goddess healer's motto is the right rewrites the wrong, the left leave the wrong bereft.
01:01:45That means she's rewarding me.
01:01:46The president would never let your company go bankrupt. In fact, she's on her way now.
01:01:54So you're telling me this dashingly handsome motherfucker over here isn't Lysander Armstrong?
01:02:00Who the fuck cares who he is?
01:02:02If the president and the goddess healer approves of my products, who cares about this washed up war hero?
01:02:07We can break his legs, break his arms, no one would even bat an eye.
01:02:10She even gave us explicit permission to call upon secret services. FBI!
01:02:16FBI!
01:02:18You're under arrest for fraudulent claims and identity theft.
01:02:22Gotcha.
01:02:27Guess I still get the last laugh, Trixie.
01:02:30No, don't arrest her!
01:02:32Trixie is a good person.
01:02:34Please officer, don't arrest her!
01:02:36Grandma, Mr. Rogers, Mrs. Williams, what are you all doing here?
01:02:40The neighbors heard about the breakup between you and Butch.
01:02:43We were worried, so we came here to back you up.
01:02:47Listen officer, I can attest that Trixie Amoria is a good neighbor.
01:02:51She's very kind-hearted and would never break the law.
01:02:54Yes, and one time when my daughter needed university tuition, Trixie gave her everything she had just to help her
01:03:01out.
01:03:01She also paid for my recent heart surgery as well.
01:03:04My fiance really is an incredible woman.
01:03:08She's an angel descended from heaven.
01:03:14You must be the criminal pretending to be General Lysander Armstrong.
01:03:18My brother is not a criminal.
01:03:20He's a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack.
01:03:25Without him, this whole country would have been bombed to ash.
01:03:28And that's why his choice to crime is stealing his identity.
01:03:31General Lysander Armstrong only fell into a coma because of the fight with the terrorist.
01:03:35And we've received no word that he's woken up yet, so this must be an imposter.
01:03:41I can tell that this whole dilemma with my identity is causing you a lot of trouble.
01:03:44I promise I'll get it resolved and we can focus on taking down your scumbag ex.
01:03:50If you want to arrest me, fine.
01:03:53But don't fuck with my fiance.
01:03:54You don't get to decide, punk.
01:03:57Let's go!
01:04:20Get him!
01:04:21If you can.
01:04:51Get him!
01:05:13Is that enough pain?
01:05:14Or do you want more?
01:05:24legend is written all over you icenander grandma meet my new fiance
01:05:34wow your new fiance he's so manly much better than your last one i always knew you'd find
01:05:42someone better it's butch's loss trixie has always paid so much better than marissa she's
01:05:49like a shining star in the sky and marissa's like a roach in the sewers bitch we name calling
01:05:55now i'll drown you out with insults from my side right fam drown out the poor drown out
01:06:00the poor drown out the poor drown out the poor drown out the poor drown out the poor see
01:06:07trixie you've got no connections no power you can't compete against me even if you have
01:06:13one guy on your side who can fight we're too honorable to fight dirty like you so you're
01:06:17using defenseless lives as your shield because you know we won't hurt them let them eat cake
01:06:32you can't shoot all of them grab what you can fam attack
01:06:53you will not hurt a single soul in my presence
01:07:02what the fuck was that i don't care what the fuck it was
01:07:05i'm not letting her make a fool of me at my own wedding
01:07:19you forgot i had a gun too that'll teach you from messing with the wig hams
01:07:24take miss trixie and her family and get out of here we're quartered
01:07:27i'll sacrifice myself to fend them off
01:07:29devon you and your brother are both good men i will not let your injury be in vain
01:07:35they will be punished
01:07:40now hold still for me
01:07:55holy fuck did she just reverse the bullet by chanting the goddess healer's chant
01:08:00she the goddess healer
01:08:06i'm all better now thank you miss trixie
01:08:09see i knew that you were no ordinary woman
01:08:12no please i am just an ordinary girl don't put me on some sort of pedestal
01:08:17sure
01:08:19you hear that she's just some average homeless girl in the streets
01:08:23she was probably holding out a super magnet that drew out the bullet
01:08:25while i do not care for glory i do believe in justice
01:08:30marissa and butch not only have you betrayed me
01:08:33but now you've hurt the innocent too
01:08:35i will make you both pay for your crimes
01:08:38and who are you to judge me for what i do
01:08:41god
01:08:42wrong
01:08:44but you're close
01:08:45oh bullshit
01:08:46i'm gonna show you how the elite can trailboard you little lives
01:08:51you wanna cross the line so bad
01:08:53then let's see you try
01:08:54charge
01:09:04the hell is this
01:09:05this is the line between life and death
01:09:10yo was that extra neon spray paint
01:09:13i'll admit it looks pretty good but uh
01:09:15i'll die before i believe that's magic
01:09:18you're not the grim reaper
01:09:19what if it's a trap that woman has many tricks up her sleeves
01:09:23we ain't afraid of her she's nothing but a circus prostitute
01:09:27why don't you cross the line and see for yourself
01:09:30i will
01:09:34left
01:09:34leaves the wrong draft
01:09:43i'm fine
01:09:44nothing happens
01:09:45you'll see soon enough
01:09:47oh please
01:09:48i really wanna die
01:09:50and you call this the line between life and death
01:09:52i knew you were just making that shit up
01:09:54whoops
01:09:55just crossed it again
01:09:57whoops
01:09:58and again
01:09:59nothing's happened
01:10:11what did you do to my brother
01:10:16i didn't do anything
01:10:17your brother just didn't want to heed my warning
01:10:21i suggest you take him to the ur
01:10:22if you don't want your wedding to become his funeral
01:10:26come on
01:10:28major
01:10:29are you not gonna help your own brother
01:10:30how was he able to cross the line
01:10:32see this must be an illusion
01:10:37only the pure of heart can cross the line
01:10:39will somebody take my brother to the hospital please
01:10:49you're so sore i wouldn't marry you
01:10:51you'd go and hurt my brother
01:10:52oh please
01:10:53you hurt us
01:10:54first
01:10:55at first
01:10:56i was really hurt by your betrayal
01:10:58but i've come to realize your true colors are that of a snake and a coward
01:11:02marissa
01:11:03thanks for taking this little life from me
01:11:07you blame yourself
01:11:08for being worthless
01:11:10you think anyone would want to marry you when you got nothing to offer
01:11:15when you wear
01:11:16odd and crazy clothes all day
01:11:21don't touch my wife
01:11:24and instead
01:11:25trixie gets a handsome
01:11:27and protective
01:11:29husband
01:11:29you can daydream all you want now trixie
01:11:32but when the presidential contract arrives
01:11:34it'll hit you like a fucking truck
01:11:36that you're nothing but an ugly phony
01:11:38and i'm the queen of everything
01:11:39oh really
01:11:41then let me show you how it is i who has everything you want
01:11:44you've got nothing on me
01:11:49yes
01:11:50tell the president to get here immediately
01:11:57goddess
01:11:57madam president
01:11:59i require your assistance
01:12:01yes we'll be there immediately
01:12:05get the vp we're leaving now
01:12:11did she just pretend to call the first woman president of the united states
01:12:15god i knew you were cheap but i didn't know you were crazy too
01:12:18i'm so glad i dumped you for marissa
01:12:21you're pathetic trixie
01:12:22a secretary to remind everyone how i have the presidential contract coming
01:12:26miss wickham is correct
01:12:27i was on the phone with the president earlier
01:12:30only the most important people have madam president's direct line
01:12:33you hear that everyone there is no way lowlife trixie could have called the president by herself
01:12:41she's just a desperate phony who doesn't get enough male attention so she's come here to play up her importance
01:12:46no my granddaughter would never do that
01:12:50reversing time just to heal someone's wound only the goddess healer can do that
01:12:55is trixie really the goddess healer
01:13:04oh first your boy toy actor pretends to be the war hero general lysander armstrong
01:13:09and now you trixie are pretending to be the goddess healer who gave me my presidential contract
01:13:14is this how the working class think all the time
01:13:18i never realized how delusional they were
01:13:21you can only dream of what you can never have
01:13:23while we rub our riches and privilege in their faces
01:13:27look i don't know what circus school you went to
01:13:29but you trying to make me jealous trixie
01:13:31it ain't working
01:13:32you can't just fake the
01:13:36yeah but goddess healing power is
01:13:39legendary it's like real magic
01:13:41trixie you're an angel
01:13:43but the goddess healing is beyond your imagination
01:13:46and if we steal her identity just to punish her ex
01:13:50won't her followers be furious and riot against you
01:13:54no
01:13:55trixie look i believe you
01:13:58you saved me
01:14:00whether you're a goddess or not you did that
01:14:04no matter what happens you are a goddess to me
01:14:06we'll riot against you now
01:14:09tear her apart
01:14:10tear her apart
01:14:12tear her apart
01:14:14tear her apart
01:14:15tear her apart
01:14:17the vice president arrives
01:14:19the vice president arrives
01:14:34who dare cause ruckus in here
01:14:40your general lysander armstrong
01:14:42wait what
01:14:44he's actually general lysander armstrong
01:14:47no no we've been through this already once okay
01:14:50right secretary cho
01:14:51this actor trixie hired pulled this weird stunt to try to bankrupt me
01:14:57but you already confirmed with madame president
01:14:59that i got the contract coming still right
01:15:01yes we all thought he was a fraud
01:15:03what i mean is
01:15:06you're the war hero
01:15:08general lysander armstrong
01:15:10and how dare you crash miss wickham's wedding
01:15:12the moment you wake up you fall under this vixen spell
01:15:16and now you're attacking one of the most important allies to the president
01:15:20so he is the general
01:15:23oh but he's in trouble now
01:15:25did you hear that
01:15:26even the vice president knows me
01:15:28as an important ally to the nation's leader
01:15:31so what if trixie picked up some washed up war hero
01:15:34we got the vp and the president
01:15:36on our side
01:15:37you'll always be nothing
01:15:40trixie
01:15:41i told you
01:15:42now punish them vice president langley
01:15:44this is treason
01:15:45lysander armstrong
01:15:46you are stripped from your military honors
01:15:49and titles
01:15:53hurry
01:15:54the goddess healer needs us
01:15:58you can't do that mr vice president
01:16:00my brother is a war hero
01:16:02he single-handedly saved this country from terrorist attack
01:16:05he was in a coma for two years
01:16:07if it wasn't for miss trixie he would
01:16:08enough
01:16:08you speak another word and i will bring down your entire family
01:16:12not just your brother
01:16:15brother
01:16:16it's okay
01:16:18mr vice president i've already given my
01:16:19life once for my country
01:16:21i have no problem doing that again if it means protecting my fiance's life
01:16:26and let's be honest about one other thing mr vice president i never gave a fuck
01:16:30about any damn titles
01:16:34i truly saved a good man
01:16:41i will not let you bring ruin to my fiance
01:16:44and what can you do about it
01:16:46oh mr vice president i have swell idea
01:16:49my biomedical company invented the latest line of poison darts for the military
01:16:53let's try it out on them
01:16:57hold on mr vice president there's no way that you're taking this seriously
01:17:00put innocent civilian lives in danger
01:17:02despicable
01:17:03what's more despicable is that you and your filthy companions are disrespecting power
01:17:08miss wickham
01:17:10you can use full force on them
01:17:12did you hear that voice
01:17:14did you hear that voice
01:17:27shoot
01:17:28wait that's the president
01:17:41Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry, Madam President.
01:17:54That was, they were totally aiming for Trixie, the fraud in the middle.
01:17:58What is this?
01:18:00Oh, that's my new biomedical weapon, Madam, for your military.
01:18:04This is a war crime. These are innocent civilian lives you're messing with.
01:18:08You're the uncivilized buffoon.
01:18:10I can shoot whoever I want. I have the presidential contract.
01:18:12With great power comes great responsibility.
01:18:15And this is the kind of dastardly creation you've made with the contract I gave you?
01:18:19What are you doing? Reverse the poison and take it out of the present before it's too late.
01:18:23That is easy.
01:18:25There's no need. I'll save everyone.
01:18:42It's raining gold!
01:18:45What's happening? Trixie doesn't have that kind of money.
01:18:48It's got to be cheap glitter.
01:18:52She, she, she is.
01:18:54She is a criminal.
01:18:56Don't worry, Madam President. We will arrest her and we'll throw her in prison.
01:19:00I'd be quiet if I were you.
01:19:01Because you're the one that would be going to prison once everyone is healed up.
01:19:04What are you talking about?
01:19:06The president literally came here to give me my billion-dollar contract.
01:19:19This contract?
01:19:21Yeah, yes!
01:19:22Thank you, first gentleman.
01:19:41My contract, you bitch!
01:19:43And that's not all.
01:19:57This foul weapon will not see the light of day.
01:19:59There is only a need for a vaccine if there is a virus.
01:20:03Don't you realize?
01:20:04Or are you too much of a goody two-shoes to understand that?
01:20:08You're the real virus here, Marissa.
01:20:10Money is worth more to you than human lives.
01:20:12And that's something I cannot tolerate.
01:20:15So prepare yourself.
01:20:16Because I'm about to smite you.
01:20:20What are you going to do?
01:20:22The president is here and I just invented the best biomedical products in the world.
01:20:28You'll pardon me for that little mishap, right?
01:20:32Madam President, you've recovered now.
01:20:35So what's your final decision?
01:20:38I'll...
01:20:39She's going to give me my billion-dollar...
01:20:46I'll smack her until she sees 50 stars.
01:20:52Why?
01:20:53Why are you attacking me, Madam President?
01:20:56You're supposed to be giving me the billion-dollar contract.
01:20:58You wish, you idiot!
01:21:02I've never seen a woman so vile, so ugly on the inside, it makes me want to vomit.
01:21:08I don't understand.
01:21:09I was just trying to punish these imposters for posing as the goddess of healing.
01:21:15And do you know the goddess healer saved me and my son during childbirth?
01:21:21You've really seen the goddess healer herself in the flesh?
01:21:24You're the one and only, and it's...
01:21:31Her.
01:21:42What?
01:21:47Welcome, goddess.
01:22:00You really are the goddess of healing, aren't you?
01:22:02How else did you think I saved you?
01:22:05Then why did you keep it a secret for so long?
01:22:09I wanted to walk the earth as a normal person,
01:22:13help those in need,
01:22:14and make sure the man I chose loved me for me.
01:22:18No, so that means the billion-dollar contract,
01:22:21it was you who gave it to me?
01:22:23She took it away just like that.
01:22:27That was our golden ticket.
01:22:28You were once my fiancé and best friend.
01:22:31But after everything you've done,
01:22:33we're officially getting ties with you both.
01:22:35No, please, I swear to you.
01:22:37I didn't know you were an ex-wife.
01:22:41It doesn't matter who she is.
01:22:43Trixie has a heart of gold.
01:22:45She's an amazing person.
01:22:46And you ruined that the moment that you betrayed her.
01:22:50She's gonna be my wife.
01:22:52Because she is the most beautiful and amazing woman on this planet.
01:23:00I love you.
01:23:14All her goals.
01:23:15All her clothes.
01:23:17All that could have been mine.
01:23:19This is all your fault.
01:23:20This is all...
01:23:21You seduced me!
01:23:24You were the one that came onto me, you himbo.
01:23:28Please, Trixie, give me another chance.
01:23:32I wanna be rich again.
01:23:34I'll be your slave.
01:23:35I'll kiss the ground you walk on.
01:23:36What?
01:23:37You've had your chance to apologize.
01:23:39But it's too late now.
01:23:41All I see is your greed and how much you'd hurt others just to benefit yourself.
01:23:46You two should be locked up.
01:23:47And she shall.
01:23:49For creating illegal weapons of mass destruction,
01:23:52arrest Marissa and Butch Wickham.
01:23:54It's all your fault, Marissa.
01:23:57I never loved you.
01:23:59It's your fault.
01:23:59I was only with you for your money.
01:24:01I don't care.
01:24:02You were rich.
01:24:03I'll see myself out.
01:24:06Rest assured, goddess.
01:24:08We will not be using these biomedical weapons.
01:24:11My platform is spreading kindness just like you.
01:24:15I knew you'd uphold our shared values.
01:24:17That is why I saved you.
01:24:19With these healing hands, I will work tirelessly to change the world one good deed at a time.
01:24:24Well, let's not let this wedding go to waste.
01:24:30Let's party!
01:24:32Wait.
01:24:33What if we just got married?
01:24:35Right now?
01:24:36Yes.
01:24:37Well.
01:24:38Woo!
01:24:40Do you take each other to be your lawfully wedded partner?
01:24:45I do.
01:24:46I do.
01:24:47You may kiss the bride.
01:24:54Let me kiss the bride.
01:24:54It doesn't count.
01:24:55To work for people.
01:24:55Neither to blame her.
01:24:55Butch ofending.
01:24:55Did you-
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