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90 Day The Single Life S03E10 DSCP WhiteHat
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00:00:00Previously on 90 Day The Single Life.
00:00:03I've never gone past kissing a woman before.
00:00:06I think Rebecca's very beautiful.
00:00:09We bide really well, and it gives me hope.
00:00:12I am down to see where you and I can go.
00:00:14Yeah?
00:00:14Yeah, I am, yeah.
00:00:19If me moving to Florida and you not...
00:00:21Yeah, me moving to Florida is a deal breaker.
00:00:23Enjoy your life with your ex.
00:00:25It sounds like you two will be very happy together in Florida.
00:00:29I'm not looking for a boyfriend.
00:00:31I'm not looking for a buddy.
00:00:32I'm looking for a husband.
00:00:39It's definitely a memorable first date.
00:00:42I had such a great time with Dan.
00:00:44I would like to see you again.
00:00:47But anytime Ronald catches me on the phone,
00:00:49he tries to reel me back in.
00:00:51My love for you is so strong.
00:00:53You don't miss me?
00:01:00I don't want to see Michael.
00:01:04But it's very confusing for me.
00:01:32It's been about a week since I went on my date with Dan.
00:01:36And the chemistry was just flying.
00:01:38It was great.
00:01:40But things just got so much more complicated.
00:01:46Last night I got a message from Ronald.
00:01:49And it said,
00:01:50Can you please bring the kids to South Africa?
00:01:53I really want to see them.
00:01:54It's been long enough.
00:01:56I love you and I miss you.
00:01:59He hasn't seen the kids in over a year.
00:02:02But I know what he's doing.
00:02:03And I know this is his way of trying to get us back together.
00:02:08To hear these things definitely messes with my feelings a lot.
00:02:12But I have to come back to reality and realize that these are just words.
00:02:23Hi friend.
00:02:25Hey.
00:02:27How's it going?
00:02:28Good.
00:02:30My friend Angelique knows my entire history with Ronald.
00:02:33So she can give me a reality check.
00:02:35Because I feel like I'm not thinking straight right now.
00:02:38What's going on?
00:02:41I've just been really stressed out.
00:02:44Why?
00:02:45You know, I'm pushing myself to go out there because I do want to move on.
00:02:49There was this one guy, Dan.
00:02:50Super sweet.
00:02:51I feel like there's something there that could definitely grow.
00:02:55And I don't know.
00:02:59I'm scared.
00:03:01I don't know what the to do.
00:03:03Why are you scared to let somebody treat you well?
00:03:09So Ronald texted me saying he wants me to bring the kids to South Africa.
00:03:14And afterwards he goes, I love you.
00:03:16I miss you.
00:03:16So I'm like, what is motivating you to even consider going to South Africa?
00:03:25Honestly, I have that guilt of like, Carly has not seen her dad in over a year.
00:03:31I hate that we're in two separate countries because it's not like her dad is here in Nebraska.
00:03:37Like, you know what?
00:03:38I'll get on a quick flight, take her, and then come back.
00:03:40It's like, other side of the world.
00:03:43It's always going to be my responsibility.
00:03:45I get to decide whether they have a relationship or not.
00:03:49I want Carly to have a relationship with him, but I just don't know.
00:03:54I don't know.
00:03:55It's so confusing.
00:03:58I really do want Carly to see her dad.
00:04:01But if I do consider going to South Africa, what's that going to do to me?
00:04:05Is that going to make me take steps backwards?
00:04:07Is that going to make me fall back into like trying to fix things with Ronald?
00:04:10I don't know.
00:04:13If you go over there and you're separated, are you staying in his house in a separate
00:04:19room?
00:04:19Are you going to his mom's?
00:04:21Do you want to be putting yourself in a situation where you're vulnerable?
00:04:26Like, I don't understand how that, how it's going to work.
00:04:31I have no idea, like, at all.
00:04:34I haven't even thought about that.
00:04:35Like, I don't know what to do.
00:04:40I thought that Tiffany and Ronald separating was probably for the best.
00:04:44Their relationship was really tumultuous.
00:04:46And my biggest fear is that by going back to South Africa, she's just going to fall into
00:04:51those patterns of loving him and wanting to be there for him instead of thinking about
00:04:55what's best for her.
00:04:59I feel like the only difference now is he's, like, realized, like, finally, in the long
00:05:05run, where his faults were.
00:05:07He's very apologetic.
00:05:10If Ronald has actually changed, then maybe it could work.
00:05:14But at the same time, I want to see you grow as a person.
00:05:18I want to see you take a chance on something that could be better for you.
00:05:24You really need to do some soul searching and figure out what is best for Tiffany for once.
00:05:31If I do go to South Africa, I'm going to see my husband that I haven't seen in over a
00:05:37year.
00:05:39And I'm not sure I'm ready for that.
00:05:42My worst fear is that I see Ronald, and I'll just see the guy that I love, and just immediately
00:05:48fall right back into fixing things with him.
00:05:51No matter what I do, the f***ing outcome is huge.
00:06:08Take my words right from my mouth.
00:06:12Kiss me, love me, shout it out.
00:06:16God.
00:06:21Oh, my God.
00:06:23I'm...
00:06:24No, it's...
00:06:30I'm about to see Michael after one year, and I feel like a lot of emotions, because
00:06:36I never thought I would be coming back.
00:06:39It's a huge deal.
00:06:48Hi.
00:06:50Hi.
00:06:51You brought me flowers?
00:07:08Come on.
00:07:09You can say.
00:07:11When I see the trailer, all memories come back to me of my life, Joe and Michael.
00:07:20You've got all your Bibles and stuff right here.
00:07:22Mm-hmm.
00:07:23Oh, what is that?
00:07:25Those are piggy banks, if I want.
00:07:27Oh, she moved in.
00:07:28Uh, yeah.
00:07:29How does she feel?
00:07:30She likes it here.
00:07:31It's definitely a change for her, you know?
00:07:34I didn't know Trish was living with him.
00:07:39I hope we don't have to see her.
00:07:43Trish caused a trouble to me, honestly.
00:07:45And Trish wants to possess and control Michael and what is around.
00:07:50Oh, my chrysa.
00:07:53She's so big now.
00:07:56Oh, hi, babuchko, hi.
00:07:58Can we go outside?
00:08:00Yeah.
00:08:01Oh, it's so beautiful now.
00:08:06Being back with Michael now, I feel like I was very legendary for him.
00:08:12I was legendary woman for Michael.
00:08:14Because he never met anyone like me, and I don't think he will ever meet.
00:08:19And for Michael, I was the best.
00:08:22For Josh, he doesn't give me this feeling.
00:08:34She hasn't seen you in forever.
00:08:38Lots of stuff going on inside right now, different emotions and stuff.
00:08:42You want to have a seat?
00:08:43Yes.
00:08:44I would hope she knows how much she hurt me, you know?
00:08:48There's a lot of pain there.
00:08:51So, just going to take it a minute at a time right now.
00:08:59So, how have things been?
00:09:01Fine, I'm fine.
00:09:03I was so stressed when I was coming here.
00:09:04I was like, how will I feel?
00:09:06What will I feel?
00:09:08Yeah?
00:09:09Why did you end up wanting to come up here?
00:09:12I wanted to see you.
00:09:15Honestly, when you told me that you're going to divorce me,
00:09:19it hurt a lot.
00:09:20You break my heart.
00:09:21I cried like crazy.
00:09:25And we didn't talk after.
00:09:27And after the war started,
00:09:29and you were the first person who actually reached out to me and support me.
00:09:35I'm glad I was able to at least, you know, try to help you and your mom out, you know?
00:09:38Yeah.
00:09:46I remember, like, when I left, I was very angry with you.
00:09:53And because, you know, I came to America, COVID started.
00:09:57We never had vacation, never had anything good.
00:09:59We had a lot of pain, a lot of fights.
00:10:05I remember, Natalie.
00:10:08The road has definitely been bumpy for us.
00:10:11Michael, it was not your fault.
00:10:13I went through emotional breakdowns.
00:10:15I lost my confidence.
00:10:16I was overweight.
00:10:17I was depressed.
00:10:18I was angry, mean.
00:10:19So many stuff.
00:10:20And I needed time to, you know, step away.
00:10:23It took a while to normalize myself until I was ready to be able to, you know, let it go.
00:10:32I'm glad that you worked on your problems and stuff, but you did hurt me a lot.
00:10:39You just up and left.
00:10:43You know, you said you wanted to take a break.
00:10:46And then all of a sudden you moved to Florida.
00:10:49And while you ran off and it seemed like you were having a lot of fun dating people.
00:10:56I was still here struggling by myself day in and day out.
00:11:02I know you were going through hard times too, but I was also going through some really, really hard times.
00:11:10I withdrew myself from everyone for a while and, yeah.
00:11:16I mean, we got married right here 10 feet away from us, you know.
00:11:26It was tough.
00:11:30I'm sorry.
00:11:34I'm sorry that I left.
00:11:37I'm sorry.
00:11:39I appreciate that.
00:11:44But Michael, we had a good start.
00:11:47Weren't we happy?
00:11:48Well, I was really happy in the beginning, Natalie.
00:11:51I never wanted a divorce with you.
00:11:53Never.
00:11:56I can't take you all out of my life.
00:12:00You left Natalie.
00:12:04Michael, I love you.
00:12:09We'll always have love for each other, Natalie.
00:12:12I could move back.
00:12:26We'll always have a good start.
00:12:30We'll always have a good start.
00:12:32We'll always have a good start.
00:12:49I went out on my first date with a woman, and it went really damn well.
00:12:54Do you feel ready?
00:12:56No, but go ahead.
00:12:59Oh, no!
00:13:01Rebecca and I tried to make plans, but it didn't work because she's leaving in just a couple days.
00:13:08However, I feel like I overcame my fears, and I'm ready to keep exploring.
00:13:14Hi!
00:13:15Hey!
00:13:16How are you?
00:13:17Good, how are you?
00:13:18Good, good.
00:13:21Today, Dre and I are having lunch with Kate.
00:13:23I became friends with Kate soon after arriving on the island.
00:13:28I haven't seen her since Johnny's party, and I'm excited to fill Kate in with everything.
00:13:34So, that was such a nice little spot that Johnny got.
00:13:38Yeah, I loved it.
00:13:39It was so much fun.
00:13:41Yeah.
00:13:43So, anybody stand out to you at the party?
00:13:48Daphne was really pretty.
00:13:50Yeah.
00:13:51And?
00:13:52That's kind of a...
00:13:55Yeah.
00:13:57What is that about?
00:13:58Oh, yeah, we haven't talked.
00:14:00Yeah.
00:14:01No.
00:14:03Well, you know, like, I just, like, there are different things I want to try.
00:14:06Just opening up to new experiences.
00:14:11Yeah.
00:14:11And I've never been with a woman.
00:14:15How does that work?
00:14:16Like, are you...
00:14:17I don't know how it works.
00:14:18I'm all new to this.
00:14:20Yeah.
00:14:20So, you know what?
00:14:21I actually went on my first date with a woman, but she's leaving in just a couple days.
00:14:26I'm mad it wasn't a potential.
00:14:28That's the only thing I'm mad about.
00:14:29You know, I was attracted to her, and maybe it could have been, but we don't know.
00:14:33And is that something that you feel is, like, aligning with what you want in life?
00:14:42Because you are still married.
00:14:47Mentally and emotionally, I'm divorced.
00:14:49I just don't understand what the holdup is.
00:14:51Wait, so you guys aren't working towards that?
00:14:54There's no working towards that.
00:14:56I didn't know if you were signing papers.
00:14:57I literally could go to the courthouse and just say, hey, can I get a no contestant divorce thing?
00:15:01I sign it, send it to St. John, he'll sign it.
00:15:03Yeah.
00:15:03I just haven't done it yet.
00:15:07I didn't know that they haven't signed those papers.
00:15:10That's news to me.
00:15:12Me, personally, I would want the man or the woman who I'm with to be officially over and done with.
00:15:19Because if you still have a legal attachment to them, I feel like that's a little strange.
00:15:25If it didn't work, why hold on to it?
00:15:29I don't care about legal papers at all in the least bit.
00:15:33But don't you think if you're entering a new relationship that that's kind of, like, residual that would be creeping
00:15:38into anything new?
00:15:42I don't get this excuse about paperwork is just paperwork.
00:15:46She still wants to hold on without actually holding on.
00:15:53It's just weird because, I don't know, it just makes me feel like maybe this isn't something that you're done
00:15:59and over with.
00:16:01It's still a legal attachment that you have.
00:16:04I don't give a about legal attachment.
00:16:05I don't.
00:16:06But it is.
00:16:08Are you going to end up in a situation where you're just stuck and then years and years go by?
00:16:15Just don't miss out.
00:16:19Moving on from my marriage is taking time because maybe I'm not actually over my ex.
00:16:49I am so disappointed with how my relationship with Justin ended.
00:16:53It's another person that seemed like such a nice guy, but who turned out to be a jerk.
00:16:58If even the nice guys are ass, then, like, who?
00:17:03Who is out there?
00:17:09I really hope Tim is not an ass.
00:17:13If there was ever a day he was going to be nice to me, today's the day.
00:17:20I told Tim that I wanted to establish boundaries with our friendship, but we went from this one-week, no
00:17:26-contact trial period to just not talking hardly at all.
00:17:30Like, that's not what I was asking for.
00:17:34Tim took it to the extreme, and I just feel abandoned.
00:17:40But I need him.
00:17:41Like, I need, need, need him right now.
00:17:44So I've asked him to meet up with me.
00:17:53Oh, my God.
00:17:57So apropos.
00:18:02Have you missed each other?
00:18:04Yeah, I'm, I'm genuinely excited to see Veronica.
00:18:07I mean, there's some things about Veronica that I miss and some things I don't.
00:18:10I've missed you.
00:18:11You have to make adjustments in life sometimes.
00:18:13It, like, it takes time to get adapted to.
00:18:15Mm-hmm.
00:18:17I'm never going to get adapted to it.
00:18:20Welcome.
00:18:21So, you know, we can boss some stuff up.
00:18:25Get in a nice, good mood.
00:18:26I'm, I'm hopefully going to get there.
00:18:29You should probably put your purse down.
00:18:33Oh.
00:18:41That sounded good.
00:18:43It did.
00:18:45Woo!
00:18:46You, Justin.
00:18:47I have just built up this, like, anger cloud over me.
00:18:54So, smashing things is very gratifying.
00:19:00I'm just like, you, Justin.
00:19:03I'm busy.
00:19:05your lack of affection.
00:19:08making me beg for it.
00:19:10Woo!
00:19:11you, Tim.
00:19:13you, my ex.
00:19:14you, my other ex.
00:19:19I'm just like, just, it all.
00:19:21it all.
00:19:22That's pretty.
00:19:23I'm blowing it out.
00:19:29I think we need to sit down and cool off for a bit.
00:19:31Okay.
00:19:34Oh, my God.
00:19:35It seemed like you got a lot of aggression to get out.
00:19:37I'm angry at everyone.
00:19:38I'm so.
00:19:39Tell me the story.
00:19:41Oh, my God.
00:19:41Tim, I don't even know where to start.
00:19:43Like, Justin's moving to Florida.
00:19:45And conveniently, he doesn't tell me he's moving to Florida until literally the night after we did it.
00:19:50He's like, oh, no.
00:19:52It was just a coincidence that it happened like that.
00:19:55So then, like, out of one side of his mouth, he's like, oh, I didn't know I was moving to
00:19:58Florida.
00:19:59And then he's like, ever since I moved to Charlotte, it was always a possibility of moving back to Florida.
00:20:03I'm sorry.
00:20:04That's being a liar.
00:20:05Yeah.
00:20:05But, I told you from the beginning, this one's going to work.
00:20:08Oh, my God.
00:20:08Yeah, but, Tim, you have been completely MIA.
00:20:10And I've needed you.
00:20:11And you haven't been there for me.
00:20:13Why do I feel like I'm being attacked?
00:20:14Because you have literally chosen me.
00:20:16Because I've been dealing with all this, Tim.
00:20:19And, like, you're right.
00:20:19It didn't end up working out.
00:20:20But, like, it would have been very nice to have somebody that I could talk to about it.
00:20:24But we talked about this.
00:20:25We established very early on with you dating this guy that I wasn't going to be that guy during this
00:20:31relationship.
00:20:32All I was saying was, don't randomly beat my house unannounced.
00:20:35That didn't mean, hey, let's not be friends anymore.
00:20:40A friend is somebody who you hang out with.
00:20:42A friend is somebody who's, like, always there for you when you need them.
00:20:45It's not been as easy, I think, she thinks it has been to just cut her out of my life.
00:20:51Normal friendships don't come with all the bull that comes of exes being friends.
00:20:58It's absolutely caused fights with me and my girlfriend.
00:21:01But it's not specifically, personally, about Veronica.
00:21:04It's just the insecurities of society.
00:21:07Okay, well, society.
00:21:12I'm sorry you feel that way, really, Veronica.
00:21:14I get that you're still mad about it, but, I mean, I don't have a time machine to go back.
00:21:18So, what do you want resolution-wise out of it?
00:21:21I want my friend back.
00:21:23I have always been there for you.
00:21:25I always thought that I would have you there for me.
00:21:27You've always said, like, we're ride or die.
00:21:30We have this marriage pact that if we don't get married by the time we're 50, like, we're going to
00:21:34get married.
00:21:37The marriage pact was Tim's idea.
00:21:39I merely agreed to it.
00:21:41And you're the one who keeps adjusting the age because you keep hitting the age.
00:21:45And now that I'm about to be 37, you're like, never mind.
00:21:48It's when we both turn 50.
00:21:50Yeah, but, I mean, I didn't actually really think that we were going to-
00:21:55Be single?
00:21:55Yeah, I just never thought that that would be a reality.
00:21:58But here we are.
00:21:59Yeah.
00:22:01I'm sorry.
00:22:02I still am your friend.
00:22:03I still care about you.
00:22:04I am your friend.
00:22:05Let's establish that.
00:22:07I didn't realize it was bothering you this badly.
00:22:10I appreciate that, Tim.
00:22:12And I hear you saying that you want to be my friend.
00:22:14But literally, I would like to see you acting like my friend, not just telling me you're my friend.
00:22:22I never thought that I would be 37 and single.
00:22:26And even though it was like a bit jokey, there was that part of me that knew that by us
00:22:32making this marriage pact, that we would always be there for each other.
00:22:36But after everything that has happened, I don't know if this friendship can ever be what it was before.
00:22:47My mama told me I got a lot to learn.
00:22:50She said love's not a healer.
00:22:52Sometimes it burns.
00:22:54Oh, oh, I will never let him go.
00:22:58Oh, oh, we're losing control.
00:23:02Hi, I'm sick, doctor.
00:23:03Oh, okay.
00:23:05And take a heart in.
00:23:14I'm struggling with the pros and cons of going to South Africa.
00:23:18The main goal here is for Carly to see her dad.
00:23:20But there are so many little things that come into play with me making that decision.
00:23:25It's been over a year since the last time I saw Ronald.
00:23:30He's always kind of trying to pull me back in and trying to reconcile.
00:23:34Let's call Dada and show him how you're a doctor.
00:23:37I've definitely lost sleep thinking over and over again what the right choice is.
00:23:43But I've made my decision.
00:23:47Hello.
00:23:49Hello.
00:23:51Carly and me are playing right now.
00:23:53She's a doctor.
00:23:55So I don't know if you want to...
00:23:57No, I'm going to tip the baby in the heart.
00:24:02Sounds great.
00:24:03It's hurting.
00:24:05His heart is hurting.
00:24:07It's a doctor.
00:24:08Let me help you.
00:24:09Hey, help me.
00:24:10Help me.
00:24:13Sounds great.
00:24:15Ah, you look so much better, my Libby.
00:24:19Let's move her.
00:24:19Let's move your toysies over there so I can talk to Dada about something.
00:24:24She has grown so much.
00:24:27Yeah.
00:24:28I don't actually have given it any thought, you know,
00:24:33maybe bringing the kids to South Africa because
00:24:36you and I both know that if I could, I would have been in the U.S. a long time
00:24:42ago, but I can't get there.
00:24:44I'm actually depending on you to bring them to me if you can.
00:24:48Um, I actually wanted to talk to you about something.
00:24:53What did I do?
00:24:54No, it's nothing you did.
00:24:56It's actually about something I did.
00:25:00What did you do?
00:25:07I bought tickets for me and Carly, and we're going to go see you.
00:25:10No, we're not.
00:25:12I'm serious.
00:25:14Yeah, man.
00:25:17Really?
00:25:17How long are you planning to come?
00:25:19I'm not sure yet.
00:25:20It's open-ended tickets for now.
00:25:21We're trying to figure it out as we go.
00:25:24I'm speechless.
00:25:27I ended up buying the tickets because I put myself in his shoes, and, you know,
00:25:32if I was the parent of this perfect little girl, you know, I'd also sit there feeling like I'm
00:25:38missing out on so much, so I think I'm doing what I can as Carly's mom to make sure that
00:25:44she
00:25:44has a relationship with her dad.
00:25:48So, what about the evening?
00:25:50I think the best thing is to maybe wait on bringing Daniel over just so he doesn't miss
00:25:55school, and also, I don't want to bring Daniel along for something that might be confusing.
00:26:01I don't know what your expectations is when you come here, but one thing I definitely expect
00:26:11us to do when you are here is to sit by a table and talk.
00:26:19Okay.
00:26:20What do you want to talk about?
00:26:24Everything.
00:26:28I love you, you love me.
00:26:30At the end of the day, we got married for a reason.
00:26:33Those feelings don't just disappear overnight.
00:26:36In the ideal world, I just want us to be a family again.
00:26:42To hear these things definitely melts my heart a little bit, but I can't show him that.
00:26:47Running in the back of my mind is the fights, the gambling, the lies, the gaslighting.
00:26:52So, I kind of have to bring myself back to earth and remind myself of these things, because
00:26:58I have the tendency to get swept away with just words, and I don't want to do that anymore.
00:27:05I still have my concerns about what's going to happen, but I know we owe each other to
00:27:12sit down and have that talk.
00:27:14I agree.
00:27:14Well, do I best to make it as comfortable as possible?
00:27:18I appreciate it.
00:27:21Ah, goodness.
00:27:22It's going to be good.
00:27:27I am willing to take this trip because my daughter deserves to have her dad in her life,
00:27:32and Ronald deserves to have his daughter in his life.
00:27:35But also, I hope seeing Ronald after all this time will, I guess, give me, like, my clear
00:27:42answer.
00:27:43Have a good night.
00:27:45Get some rest.
00:27:46Have a good evening.
00:27:47All right.
00:27:47Bye-bye.
00:27:49Bye-bye.
00:28:06And with the closed eyes, let's take a long inhale and exhale.
00:28:16I've been in Aruba for a few months.
00:28:19When I came to Aruba, I was ready to start a new chapter.
00:28:23I've never gone past kissing a woman before.
00:28:26I think Rebecca's very beautiful.
00:28:28We vibe really well, and it gives me hope.
00:28:31I am down to see, like, where you and I can go.
00:28:34Yeah?
00:28:34Yeah.
00:28:35Oh, yeah.
00:28:36Yeah.
00:28:38If me moving to Florida and you not...
00:28:41Yeah, me moving to Florida is a deal breaker.
00:28:43Enjoy your life with your ex.
00:28:45It sounds like you two will be very happy together in Florida.
00:28:48I'm not looking for a boyfriend.
00:28:50I'm not looking for a buddy.
00:28:52I'm looking for a husband.
00:28:59It's definitely a memorable first date.
00:29:02I had such a great time with Dan.
00:29:04I would like to see you again.
00:29:06Aw.
00:29:07But anytime Ronald catches me on the phone, he tries to reel me back in.
00:29:11My love for you is so strong.
00:29:13You don't miss me?
00:29:19Oh, God.
00:29:20I don't want to see Michael, but it's very confusing for me.
00:29:52It's been about a week since I went on my date with Dan.
00:29:56And the chemistry was just flying.
00:29:58It was great.
00:30:00But things just got so much more complicated.
00:30:06Last night, I got a message from Ronald.
00:30:19He hasn't seen the kids in over a year, but I know what he's doing.
00:30:23And I know this is his way of trying to get us back together.
00:30:28To hear these things definitely messes with my feelings a lot.
00:30:32But I have to come back to reality and realize that these are just words.
00:30:43Hi, friend.
00:30:45Hey.
00:30:47How's it going?
00:30:48Good.
00:30:50My friend Angelique knows my entire history with Ronald, so she can give me a reality check
00:30:54because I feel like I'm not thinking straight right now.
00:30:58What's going on?
00:30:59And I've just been actually really stressed out.
00:31:04Why?
00:31:05You know, I'm pushing myself to go out there because I do want to move on.
00:31:08There was this one guy, Dan.
00:31:10Super sweet.
00:31:11I feel like there's something there that could definitely grow.
00:31:14And I don't know.
00:31:19I'm scared.
00:31:20I don't know what the to do.
00:31:23Why are you scared to let somebody treat you well?
00:31:29So, Ronald texted me saying he wants me to bring the kids to South Africa.
00:31:33And afterwards he goes, I love you.
00:31:36I miss you.
00:31:36So I'm like, what is motivating you to even consider going to South Africa?
00:31:44Honestly, I have that guilt of like, Carly has not seen her dad in over a year.
00:31:51I hate that we're in two separate countries because it's not like her dad is here in Nebraska.
00:31:57Like, you know what?
00:31:57I'll get on a quick flight, take her, and then come back.
00:32:00It's like the other side of the world.
00:32:02It's always going to be my responsibility.
00:32:05I get to decide whether they have a relationship or not.
00:32:09I want Carly to have a relationship with him, but I just don't know.
00:32:14I don't know.
00:32:15It's so confusing.
00:32:18I really do want Carly to see her dad, but if I do consider going to South Africa, what's that
00:32:24going to do to me?
00:32:24Is that going to make me take steps backwards?
00:32:26Is that going to make me fall back into like trying to fix things with Ronald?
00:32:30I don't know.
00:32:32If you go over there and you're separated, are you staying in his house in a separate room?
00:32:39Are you going to his mom's?
00:32:41Do you want to be putting yourself in a situation where you're vulnerable?
00:32:45Like, I don't understand how that, how it's going to work.
00:32:51I have no idea, like, at all.
00:32:54I haven't even thought about that.
00:32:55Like, I don't know what to do.
00:33:00I thought that Tiffany and Ronald separating was probably for the best.
00:33:04Their relationship was really tumultuous.
00:33:06And my biggest fear is that by going back to South Africa, she's just going to fall into those patterns
00:33:11of loving him and wanting to be there for him instead of thinking about what's best for her.
00:33:19I feel like the only difference now is he's, like, realized, like, finally, in the long run, where his faults
00:33:26were.
00:33:27He's very apologetic.
00:33:29If Ronald has actually changed, then maybe it could work.
00:33:34But at the same time, I want to see you grow as a person.
00:33:38I want to see you take a chance on something that could be better for you.
00:33:43You really need to do some soul searching and figure out what is best for Tiffany for once.
00:33:51If I do go to South Africa, I'm going to see my husband that I haven't seen in over a
00:33:57year.
00:33:58And I'm not sure I'm ready for that.
00:34:02My worst fear is that I see Ronald and I'll just see the guy that I love and just immediately
00:34:08fall right back into fixing things with him.
00:34:11No matter what I do, the f***ing outcome is huge.
00:34:36Oh, my God.
00:34:38Oh, my God.
00:34:43I'm...
00:34:43Ronald.
00:34:49I'm about to see Michael after one year, and I feel, like, a lot of emotions because I never thought
00:34:57I would be coming back.
00:34:59It's a huge deal.
00:35:08Hi.
00:35:10Hi, Robbie Flowers.
00:35:28Come on.
00:35:29You can sit.
00:35:31When I see the trailer, all memories come back to me of my life, Joe and Michael.
00:35:39You've got all your Bibles and stuff right here.
00:35:42Mm-hmm.
00:35:43Oh, what is that?
00:35:45Those are piggy banks, my mom.
00:35:46Oh, she moved in.
00:35:48Uh, yeah.
00:35:49How does she feel?
00:35:50She likes it here.
00:35:50It's definitely a change for her, you know?
00:35:54I didn't know Trish was living with him.
00:35:59I hope we don't have to see her.
00:36:02Trish caused a trouble to me, honestly.
00:36:05And Trish wants to possess and control Michael and what is around.
00:36:09Oh, my chrysa.
00:36:13She's so big now.
00:36:15Oh, hi, buddhko.
00:36:17Hi.
00:36:18Can we go outside?
00:36:19Yeah.
00:36:21Oh, it's so beautiful now.
00:36:25Being back with Michael now, I feel like I was very legendary for him.
00:36:32I was a legendary woman for Michael because he never met anyone like me, and I don't think
00:36:37he will ever meet.
00:36:39And for Michael, I was the best.
00:36:42For Josh, he doesn't give me this feeling.
00:36:54She hasn't seen you in forever.
00:36:58Lots of stuff going on inside right now, different emotions and stuff.
00:37:02You want to have a seat?
00:37:03Yes.
00:37:04I would hope she knows how much she hurt me, you know?
00:37:08There's a lot of pain there.
00:37:11So, just going to take it a minute at a time right now.
00:37:19So, how have things been?
00:37:21Fine, I'm fine.
00:37:22I was so stressed when I was coming here.
00:37:24I was like, how will I feel?
00:37:25What will I feel?
00:37:28Yeah?
00:37:29Why did you end up wanting to come up here?
00:37:32I wanted to see you.
00:37:35Honestly, when you told me that you're going to divorce me, it hurt a lot.
00:37:40You break my heart.
00:37:41I cried like crazy.
00:37:54I'm glad I was able to at least, you know, try to help you and your mom out, you know?
00:38:23I remember, Natalie.
00:38:27The road has definitely been bumpy for us.
00:38:30Michael, it was not your fault.
00:38:32I went through emotional breakdowns.
00:38:34I lost my confidence.
00:38:36I was overweight.
00:38:37I was depressed.
00:38:38I was angry, mean.
00:38:39So many stuff.
00:38:40And I needed time to, you know, step away.
00:38:43It took a while to normalize myself until I was ready to be able to, you know, let it go.
00:38:52I'm glad that you worked on your problems and stuff, but you did hurt me a lot.
00:38:59You just up and left.
00:39:02You know, you said you wanted to take a break, and then all of a sudden you moved to Florida,
00:39:08and you ran off, and it seemed like you were having a lot of fun dating people.
00:39:16I was still here struggling by myself day in and day out.
00:39:22I know you were going through hard times, too, but I was also going through some really, really hard times.
00:39:28I, uh, withdrew myself from everyone for a while, and, uh, yeah.
00:39:36I mean, we got married right here 10 feet away from us, you know.
00:39:46It was tough.
00:39:50I'm sorry.
00:39:54I'm sorry that I left.
00:39:57I'm sorry.
00:39:59Appreciate that.
00:40:01It was my mistake.
00:40:04But, Michael, we had a good start.
00:40:06Weren't we happy?
00:40:08Well, I was really happy in the beginning, Natalie.
00:40:11I never wanted a divorce with you.
00:40:12Never.
00:40:16I can't take you all out of my life.
00:40:20You left, Natalie.
00:40:24Michael, I love you.
00:40:28We'll always have love for each other, Natalie.
00:40:32I could move back.
00:40:59I can't take you all out of my life.
00:41:09I went out on my first date with a woman, and it went really damn well.
00:41:14Do you feel ready?
00:41:16No, but go ahead.
00:41:18Oh, no!
00:41:20Rebecca and I tried to make plans, but it didn't work because she's leaving in just a couple days.
00:41:27However, I feel like I overcame my fears, and I'm ready to keep exploring.
00:41:33Hi!
00:41:34Hey!
00:41:36How are you?
00:41:37Good, how are you?
00:41:38Good, good.
00:41:41Today, Dre and I are having lunch with Kate.
00:41:43I became friends with Kate soon after arriving on the island.
00:41:48I haven't seen her since Johnny's party, and I'm excited to fill Kate in with everything.
00:41:53So, that was such a nice little spot that Johnny got.
00:41:58Yeah, I loved it.
00:41:59It was so much fun.
00:42:00Yeah.
00:42:03So, anybody stand out to you at the party?
00:42:08Daphne was really pretty.
00:42:10Yeah.
00:42:11And...
00:42:12That's kind of a...
00:42:15Yeah.
00:42:17What is that about?
00:42:18Oh, yeah, we haven't talked.
00:42:20Yeah.
00:42:20No.
00:42:23Well, you know, like, I just, like, there are different things I want to try.
00:42:26I'm just opening up to new experiences.
00:42:30Yeah.
00:42:31And I've never been with a woman.
00:42:34Yeah.
00:42:35How does that work?
00:42:36Like, are you...
00:42:37I don't know how it works.
00:42:38I'm all new to this.
00:42:39Yeah.
00:42:40So, you know what?
00:42:41I actually went on my first date with a woman, but she's leaving in just a couple days.
00:42:46I'm mad it wasn't a potential.
00:42:47That's the only thing I'm mad about.
00:42:49You know, I was attracted to her, and maybe it could have been, but we don't know.
00:42:52And is that something that you feel is, like, aligning with what you want in life?
00:43:02Because you are still married.
00:43:07Mentally and emotionally, I'm divorced.
00:43:09I just don't understand what the holdup is.
00:43:11Wait, so you guys aren't working towards that?
00:43:14There's no working towards that.
00:43:15I didn't know if you were signing papers.
00:43:17I literally could go to the courthouse and just say, hey, can I get a no contestant divorce thing?
00:43:21I sign it, send it to St. Jean, he'll sign it.
00:43:23Yeah.
00:43:23I just haven't done it yet.
00:43:27I didn't know that they haven't signed those papers.
00:43:30That's news to me.
00:43:32Me, personally, I would want the man or the woman who I'm with to be officially over and done with.
00:43:39Because if you still have a legal attachment to them, I feel like that's a little strange.
00:43:45If it didn't work, why hold on to it?
00:43:49I don't care about legal papers at all in the least bit.
00:43:53But don't you think, if you're entering a new relationship, that that's kind of, like, residual that would be creeping
00:43:58into anything new?
00:44:01I don't get this excuse about paperwork is just paperwork.
00:44:06She still wants to hold on without actually holding on.
00:44:12It's just weird because, I don't know, it just makes me feel like maybe this isn't something that you're done
00:44:18and over with.
00:44:20It's still a legal attachment that you have.
00:44:23I don't give a about legal attachment.
00:44:25I don't.
00:44:26But it is.
00:44:28Are you going to end up in a situation where you're just stuck and then years and years go by?
00:44:35Just don't miss out.
00:44:38Moving on from my marriage is taking time because maybe I'm not actually over my ex.
00:45:09I am so disappointed with how my relationship with Justin ended.
00:45:13It's another person that seemed like such a nice guy, but who turned out to be a jerk.
00:45:18If even the nice guys are ass, then, like, who?
00:45:22Who is out there?
00:45:26Oh, I really hope Tim is not an ass.
00:45:33If there was ever a day he was going to be nice to me, today's the day.
00:45:39I told Tim that I wanted to establish boundaries with our friendship, but we went from this one-week, no
00:45:46-contact trial period to just not talking hardly at all.
00:45:50Like, that's not what I was asking for.
00:45:53Tim took it to the extreme, and I just feel abandoned.
00:45:59But I need him.
00:46:01Like, I need, need, need him right now.
00:46:03So, I've asked him to meet up with me.
00:46:13Oh, my God.
00:46:17So apropos.
00:46:22Have you missed each other?
00:46:24Yeah, I'm, I'm genuinely excited to see Veronica.
00:46:27I mean, there's some things about Veronica that I miss, and some things I don't.
00:46:29I've missed you.
00:46:30Well, you have to make adjustments in life sometimes.
00:46:33Like, it takes time to get adapted to it.
00:46:35Mm-hmm.
00:46:36I'm never going to get adapted to it.
00:46:40Welcome.
00:46:41So, you know, we can boss some stuff up, get in a nice, good mood.
00:46:46I'm, I'm hopefully going to get there.
00:46:49You should probably put your purse down.
00:46:53Oh.
00:46:56Ah!
00:46:57Ah!
00:46:58Ah!
00:46:58Ah!
00:46:58Ah!
00:46:58Ah!
00:46:59Ah!
00:47:00Ah!
00:47:00Ah!
00:47:02That sounded good.
00:47:02It did.
00:47:05Whoo, you, Justin.
00:47:07I have just built up this, like, anger cloud over me.
00:47:13So smashing things is very gratifying.
00:47:18Ah!
00:47:20I'm just like, you, Justin.
00:47:23, I'm busy.
00:47:25your lack of affection.
00:47:27You're making me beg for me.
00:47:29Woo!
00:47:31you Tim, you my ex, you my other ex.
00:47:38Like, just it all, it all.
00:47:42That's really a line out!
00:47:48I think we need to sit down and cool off for a bit.
00:47:51Okay.
00:47:53Oh my God, it seemed like you got a lot
00:47:55of aggression to get out.
00:47:57I'm angry at everyone.
00:47:58I'm so-
00:47:59Tell me the story.
00:48:00Oh my God, Tim, I don't even know where to start.
00:48:03Like, Justin's moving to Florida.
00:48:04And conveniently, he doesn't tell me
00:48:06he's moving to Florida until literally
00:48:08the night after we did it.
00:48:10He's like, oh no, it was just a coincidence
00:48:13that it happened like that.
00:48:15So then like, at one side of his mouth,
00:48:16he's like, oh, I didn't know I was moving to Florida.
00:48:19And then he's like, ever since I moved to Charlotte,
00:48:20it was always a possibility of moving back to Florida.
00:48:23I'm sorry, that's being a liar.
00:48:24Yeah.
00:48:25But if I tell you from the beginning,
00:48:27this one's gonna work.
00:48:27Oh my God, yeah, but Tim, you have been completely MIA.
00:48:30And I've needed you and you haven't been there for me.
00:48:32Why do I feel like I'm being attacked?
00:48:34Because you have literally posted me.
00:48:36Because I've been dealing with all this Tim.
00:48:38And like, you're right, it didn't end up working out,
00:48:40but like, it would have been very nice to have somebody
00:48:43that I could talk to about it.
00:48:44But we talked about this.
00:48:45We established very early on with you dating this guy
00:48:47that I wasn't gonna be that guy during this relationship.
00:48:51All I was saying was don't randomly beat my house unannounced.
00:48:55That didn't mean, hey, let's not be friends anymore.
00:49:00A friend is somebody who you hang out with.
00:49:02A friend is somebody who's like always there for you
00:49:04when you need them.
00:49:05It's not been as easy, I think she thinks it has been,
00:49:09to just cut her out of my life.
00:49:12Normal friendships don't come with all the bull that comes
00:49:15of exes being friends.
00:49:18It's absolutely caused fights with me and my girlfriend,
00:49:20but it's not specifically, personally, about Veronica.
00:49:24It's just the insecurities of society.
00:49:26Okay, well, society.
00:49:32I'm sorry you feel that way, really, Veronica.
00:49:34I get that you're still mad about it,
00:49:35but I mean, I don't have a time machine to go back,
00:49:38so what do you want resolution-wise out of it?
00:49:40I want my friend back.
00:49:43I have always been there for you.
00:49:44I always thought that I would have you there for me.
00:49:47You've always said, like, we're ride or die.
00:49:49We have this marriage pact that if we don't get married
00:49:52by the time we're 50, like, we're gonna get married.
00:49:56The marriage pact was Tim's idea.
00:49:59I merely agreed to it, and you're the one
00:50:02who keeps adjusting the age,
00:50:03because you keep hitting the age,
00:50:05and now that I'm about to be 37, you're like, never mind.
00:50:08It's when we both turn 50.
00:50:10Yeah, but I mean, I didn't actually really think
00:50:13that we were gonna go-
00:50:14Be single or unmarried?
00:50:15Yeah, I just never thought that that would be a reality.
00:50:18But here we are.
00:50:19Yeah.
00:50:20I'm sorry.
00:50:22I still am your friend.
00:50:23I still care about you.
00:50:24I am your friend, and let's establish that.
00:50:26I didn't realize it was bothering you this badly.
00:50:30I appreciate that, Tim, and I hear you saying
00:50:32that you want to be my friend, but, literally,
00:50:34I would like to see you acting like my friend,
00:50:36not just telling me you're my friend.
00:50:42I never thought that I would be 37 and single.
00:50:46And even though it was, like, a bit jokey,
00:50:48there was that part of me that knew that by us
00:50:52making this marriage pact, that we would always be there
00:50:55for each other.
00:50:56But after everything that has happened,
00:50:59I don't know if this friendship can ever be what it was before.
00:51:07My mama told me I got a lot to learn.
00:51:10She said love's not a healer.
00:51:12Sometimes it burns.
00:51:15I will never let him go.
00:51:18We're losing control.
00:51:24She said love's not a healer, and that we would never miss another.
00:51:27She said love's not a healer.
00:51:33She was a healer, and that's a healer.
00:51:45It's been over a year since the last time I saw Ronald.
00:51:49He's always kind of trying to pull me back in
00:51:52and trying to reconcile.
00:51:53Let's call Dada and show him how you're a doctor.
00:51:57I've definitely lost sleep thinking over and over again
00:52:00what the right choice is, but I've made my decision.
00:52:07Hello.
00:52:09Hello.
00:52:11Carly and me are playing right now.
00:52:13She's a doctor.
00:52:14I don't know if you want to...
00:52:17No, I'm going to tip the baby in the heart.
00:52:22Sounds great.
00:52:23It's hurting.
00:52:25His heart is hurting.
00:52:27Let me help you.
00:52:29Hey, help me.
00:52:33Sounds great.
00:52:34I feel so much better, my Libby.
00:52:39Let's move your toys over there so I can talk to Dada about something.
00:52:44She has grown so much.
00:52:47Yeah.
00:52:48I don't actually have given it any thought, you know,
00:52:53maybe bringing the kids to South Africa because
00:52:56you and I both know that
00:52:59if I could, I would have been in the U.S. a long time ago,
00:53:02but I can't get there.
00:53:04I'm actually depending on you to bring them to me if you can.
00:53:08I actually wanted to talk to you about something.
00:53:12What?
00:53:13What did I do?
00:53:14No, it's nothing you did.
00:53:15It's actually about something I did.
00:53:20What did you do?
00:53:26I bought tickets for me and Carly and we're going to go see you.
00:53:30No way.
00:53:31I'm serious.
00:53:34Yeah, man.
00:53:36Really?
00:53:37How long are you planning to come?
00:53:39I'm not sure yet.
00:53:40It's open-ended tickets for now.
00:53:41We're trying to figure it out as we go.
00:53:43I'm speechless.
00:53:47I ended up buying the tickets because I put myself in his shoes
00:53:50and, you know, if I was the parent of this perfect little girl,
00:53:56you know, I'd also sit there feeling like I'm missing out on so much.
00:53:59So I think I'm doing what I can as Carly's mom
00:54:02to make sure that she has a relationship with her dad.
00:54:08So, what about winning?
00:54:09I think the best thing is to maybe wait on bringing Daniel over
00:54:14just so he doesn't miss school.
00:54:15And also, I don't want to bring Daniel along for something
00:54:18that might be confusing.
00:54:21I don't know what your expectations is when you come here.
00:54:26But one thing I definitely expect us to do when you are here.
00:54:35You sit by a table and talk.
00:54:39Okay.
00:54:40What do you want to talk about?
00:54:44Every time.
00:54:47I love you.
00:54:48You love me.
00:54:49At the end of the day, we got married for a reason.
00:54:52Those feelings don't just disappear overnight.
00:54:56In the ideal world, I just want us to be a family again.
00:55:01To hear these things definitely melts my heart a little bit,
00:55:04but I can't show him that.
00:55:07Running in the back of my mind is the fights, the gambling,
00:55:10the lies, the gaslighting.
00:55:12So I kind of have to, like, bring myself back to earth
00:55:15and remind myself of these things
00:55:16because I have the tendency to get swept away with just words
00:55:21and I don't want to do that anymore.
00:55:24I still have my concerns about, like, what's going to happen.
00:55:29But I know we owe each other to sit down and have that talk.
00:55:33I agree.
00:55:35We'll do our best to make it as comfortable as possible.
00:55:38I appreciate it.
00:55:40Ah, goodness.
00:55:42It's going to be good.
00:55:46I am willing to take this trip because
00:55:50my daughter deserves to have her dad in her life
00:55:52and Ronald deserves to have his daughter in his life.
00:55:54But also, I hope seeing Ronald after all this time
00:56:00will, I guess, give me, like, my clear answer.
00:56:03Have a good night. Get some rest.
00:56:05Have a good evening.
00:56:06All right. Bye-bye.
00:56:08Bye.
00:56:26And with the closed eyes, let's take a long inhale and exhale.
00:56:35I've been in Aruba for a few months.
00:56:38When I came to Aruba, I was ready to start a new chapter.
00:56:43But recently, I started realizing that I haven't fully healed from
00:56:48my separation from my husband's engine.
00:56:51It hurts. It hurts.
00:56:55We're so privileged to be here
00:56:58and be able to share a safe space between women
00:57:03and to remind each other about past experiences,
00:57:08a new focus on the future.
00:57:11I still need to fully process my grief
00:57:14and, like, everything post-separation.
00:57:16So I decided to do a women's circle.
00:57:20I think it can help me to move on from my marriage.
00:57:27The intention I set for this women's circle
00:57:29is about letting go of your past.
00:57:33We begin by opening the space.
00:57:37Inhale and exhale slowly.
00:57:40You have all the answers in you.
00:57:44All of this toxic energy, may we cut this energy now.
00:57:52I never imagined separating from my husband, Sinjin.
00:57:57Will I find that deep love again?
00:57:59Like, will I feel that deep love?
00:58:02And I never had a question.
00:58:04I never had a question.
00:58:08Like, Sinjin's love for me.
00:58:15But there was a lot more bigger issues in our relationship.
00:58:34I never had a question like Sinjin's love for me.
00:58:47It's hard thinking about the future.
00:58:51Sinjin and I are over.
00:58:52We're no longer together.
00:58:57I'll never regret my relationship with Sinjin.
00:59:00But moving forward, there's things emotionally that I have to continue to work through.
00:59:07Gently coming back to the space.
00:59:11Move a bit.
00:59:13Create some energy.
00:59:15Share some energy.
00:59:17If you would like to share with the others in the group.
00:59:23Yeah, a lot came up for me.
00:59:26I have things I know I need to work on and heal on.
00:59:29My relationship was so miserable.
00:59:31So, going forward, like, I just want to make sure I'm thinking of myself.
00:59:35And just being intentional with any new relationships that I may start.
00:59:39I'm in charge of my own happiness.
00:59:40So, it's just something I need to make sure I'm focusing on moving forward.
00:59:46So, thank you.
00:59:49Namaste.
00:59:54Now, moving forward, I need to be intentional with dating and relationships and taking it all a little bit more
01:00:01seriously.
01:00:03It's my time for something new.
01:00:06This just feels like deja vu.
01:00:09I know I want and I deserve to be happy.
01:00:12Whether it's with a man or with a woman.
01:00:17May you be divinely protected in this beautiful space.
01:00:22It means I'm open for opportunities.
01:00:24I'm open for chances.
01:00:25I'm open for miracles.
01:00:28And I'm ready to be able to move on.
01:00:30I'm open for myself.
01:00:31Love it.
01:00:33Love it.
01:00:43Don't you drink my soul if you've got nothing to say.
01:00:50I've got something to say.
01:00:56Being separated from Tiffany is really hard,
01:01:00but being separated from Kali is even harder.
01:01:02It did me serious hard.
01:01:05In a few minutes, I'm going to be face-to-face with Ronald.
01:01:10I'm potentially walking back into my old relationship
01:01:14that made me miserable.
01:01:16You are married.
01:01:18So either we fixed this or we don't.
01:01:25You totally used Michael.
01:01:27That's all you did was use him to get to America.
01:01:32Trish looked at me like a person who could take her son from her.
01:01:37But I have to accept it if I want to be with Michael.
01:02:06She knew him, and got an extra hand.
01:02:10Be able to get a extra hand with a cell.
01:02:11I'm sorry.
01:02:12I'm going to be with Michael.
01:02:13So I'm going to be with Michael and Slavon.
01:02:14To see you later, Michael.
01:02:14I'm here to see you fine.
01:02:14I've got a little bit of it.
01:02:14But we're going to be with Michael,
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