- 5 hours ago
13 Reasons Why - Season 2 Episode 5
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00:28Nothing that's worth anything
00:30comes without pain.
00:43A work of art is only good
00:45if it arises from necessity,
00:47from need.
00:50It can be political need
00:51or personal need
00:53or ideally both.
00:59Art should be confrontation.
01:01It should shock and scare you.
01:04And Hannah?
01:06She was an artist in need.
01:09And I think that's what happened.
01:12She freaked people out.
01:15All right.
01:19And how does this not make us
01:20more likely to be
01:21the targets of abuse and ridicule?
01:24Because it's like
01:26claiming the word as our own.
01:29Reappropriation.
01:30Like saying,
01:30we're the assholes,
01:32so don't fuck with us.
01:33Okay, yeah,
01:33sort of like our
01:35superhero outfits, right?
01:36Like, it's a bird,
01:38it's a plane,
01:38it's the assholes.
01:40It's us.
01:40Yeah, just
01:42maybe don't say that.
01:53A soul in need
01:54needs a way to express it.
01:57Silence is never the answer.
01:59When there's so much
02:01going on inside you,
02:05society expects us
02:06to stay silent.
02:16And it's a dangerous thing
02:17when there's so much
02:18going on inside you,
02:20but no one to share it with.
02:24Kevin?
02:25Honey, you forgot your lunch.
02:27Thanks.
02:28I'll be right there.
02:29Okay.
02:30Okay.
02:31Okay.
02:48Good lord,
02:49these morning practices
02:50are killing me.
02:51I'm passing out
02:52at exactly 4.30 today.
02:55Or,
02:56you could come back
02:57to my place.
02:58I don't think
02:59I'm gonna have the energy.
03:01For dinner?
03:01My parents want to meet you.
03:02They do?
03:03Yeah.
03:04That's so cool!
03:06Oh my god,
03:06that's so terrifying.
03:07No, it's no big deal.
03:09My dad just happens
03:09to be in town for a bit.
03:11I'm always talking about you.
03:13I'm so excited!
03:16Amazing.
03:16I'll see you in third.
03:17Okay, bye.
03:22Oh, hey babe,
03:22I wanted to talk to you about...
03:23Wait, I should buy a dress.
03:25You want me to buy a dress?
03:26Okay, or at least
03:26go home and change.
03:27I'll need at least an hour, okay?
03:29Yeah, fine.
03:31Hey, how is practice?
03:32With all the captain's stuff
03:34and, you know, Jess.
03:36It's great.
03:37It's going really well.
03:38Cool.
03:39Awesome.
03:39Okay.
03:40Bye.
03:40Bye.
03:42Hannah needed to reclaim her power.
03:45Are you gonna ask him
03:46about the Polaroid?
03:47I don't trust him
03:49any more than I did yesterday.
03:50How can you not trust
03:52that little sleeping angel?
04:00What the fuck are you looking at?
04:04Justin, do you think
04:05that you can keep
04:06your shit together
04:07until someone comes over
04:08to look after you later?
04:10I'm not.
04:11I'm the runner lady.
04:11I gotta get to school.
04:12I'm fine.
04:13I don't...
04:13I don't need a babysitter.
04:16It's just so fucking cold in here.
04:18It's chills.
04:19He has a fever.
04:20It's chills.
04:21You have a fever.
04:21Well, get him another blanket.
04:32Maybe a shower would help?
04:34Not that bad.
04:35You smell like dead feet.
04:36Just shower, please.
04:39Oh, I'm hungry.
04:41How can you be hungry?
04:42You threw everything up.
04:45Maybe that's why I'm hungry.
04:48Take a shower.
04:52Have you seen this?
04:54Oh, God.
04:55Was there anyone in your class
04:56this Hannah wasn't involved with?
04:59What?
05:00What do you mean?
05:01Every day,
05:02there's another boy in the story.
05:05It's not surprising
05:06that she had a reputation.
05:10I will just be glad
05:11when this is all over
05:12for you tomorrow
05:13and you are as far removed
05:15from this mess as possible.
05:19Yeah.
05:34Hey, your mom started to think
05:36you were avoiding us.
05:37Avoiding you?
05:38No, no, no.
05:38I've just got a lot going on,
05:40you know?
05:40You can't take every meal
05:42in your room, kiddo.
05:44I've just got
05:46so much work.
05:48How about taking a break
05:48with me tonight?
05:50Vertigo's at the Crestmont.
05:51Let's go.
05:53Oh, wow.
05:56Um...
05:56Is that the shower?
05:58Yeah.
05:59Yeah, that's my, um...
06:00I just figured I'd grab some food
06:02while I let it heat up.
06:03Yeah, that new tankless heater
06:04takes a while to warm up.
06:05It shouldn't take this long.
06:06Oh, that's not a big deal.
06:07No, sometimes the valve
06:09is on the cold side.
06:09It's all good.
06:10Have some coffee.
06:12Yeah, I'll get more.
06:13Yeah, movie tonight.
06:15Exciting.
06:15So, yeah.
06:16Thanks.
06:25What the fuck?
06:26Ah, yeah, dad.
06:28Plenty hot.
06:29Water heater's totally working.
06:34Shit.
06:35Sorry.
06:35Just quiet.
06:36It's okay.
06:45Can you get out now?
06:46Don't have to look like
06:47I'm the one in the shower,
06:48you idiot.
06:51Whoa.
06:53Can you pass me
06:53some more shampoo?
06:55You just need to be
06:56sympathetic, Olivia.
06:57I worry about calling
06:58Ryan Shaver.
06:59His deposition
07:00was practically smug.
07:01Well, we're putting
07:01pieces together.
07:02We have to get
07:03Hannah's palm
07:03into evidence
07:04and he's the one who...
07:06printed it.
07:11Good morning.
07:12Hi, I'm Andy.
07:13Oh, of course.
07:14I remember.
07:15Will you be joining us today?
07:16No, no, he won't.
07:20Well, I'll give you two
07:20a minute.
07:27I want to be here
07:28with you.
07:29I need to be here.
07:31I'm sorry I haven't been.
07:33There are things
07:34that they've been saying
07:35in there.
07:36Things that you'll hear.
07:39We have no idea.
07:41I'll learn.
07:46I don't know.
07:48It's definitely
07:49not the pool house.
07:52So where is it then?
07:54I could ask
07:55one of the guys
07:56and maybe figure out...
07:58No.
07:58Yeah.
07:59You stay here
08:00until you're clean
08:01for Jessica.
08:04I could just show
08:05this around.
08:06It's...
08:06No, I got it.
08:08Fuck me.
08:09Fuck.
08:12Wait.
08:14He's my babysitter?
08:15What happened to Sherry?
08:17Sherry couldn't skip
08:18twice in a row.
08:19She's taking the evening shift.
08:21I thought he wanted
08:22nothing to do with me.
08:23No, I don't.
08:24So keep your mouth shut
08:26and don't piss me off.
08:27Don't piss me off.
08:29And if you puke
08:30on this leather
08:30I'm going to have
08:31to kick your ass.
08:32Great.
08:34So...
08:36WebMD detox info
08:37and contingency plans
08:38are on the desk.
08:38Don't let anyone see you
08:40and...
08:41I gotta go.
08:42Have fun.
08:43Don't kill each other.
08:45Thanks.
08:46Bye.
08:49But as is almost always
08:50the case in high school
08:51we mock what we don't
08:52understand.
08:53And that's what the kids
08:54at Liberty did to Hannah.
08:55And what about faculty?
08:56I mean, didn't they express
08:58concern over the poem's
08:59suicidal contents?
09:00The poem was read aloud
09:01in Mrs. Cusick's class.
09:03That's about it.
09:04So no one addressed
09:06the anonymous author's
09:08obvious cry for help
09:09or ask you who wrote it?
09:12Nope.
09:13No one took it seriously.
09:15But then again
09:16they rarely do.
09:23We hit the big time
09:25Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
09:27I'm such a maniac
09:29You're such a maniac
09:31We're fucking maniacs
09:32We're fucking maniacs
09:34Ooh
09:36Mr. Dow?
09:37The city of night
09:38is the city of fools
09:40Childhood of a horse
09:41that he rides to the school
09:42My office
09:43Now
09:59I think you know
10:00why you're here
10:01Yeah, I'm aware
10:08You want to tell me
10:09about these?
10:12Wait, that's what
10:13this is about?
10:14You took the pictures?
10:17Yeah
10:18Last year
10:20How'd they end up
10:21saying drunk slut?
10:23Mr. Porter
10:23I didn't do that
10:24I went into
10:25the photography classroom
10:26and the printed history
10:28in the lab
10:28said that you were
10:29signed in
10:30Someone must have
10:31used it while
10:31I was developing
10:32in the darkroom then
10:33Okay
10:35So do we know
10:37who might be doing
10:38this to Jessica then?
10:39Same person
10:40who smashed my camera
10:41Did anyone ever find them?
10:43Who Jessica and I
10:44get messed with?
10:45And the people
10:46that deserve
10:47to get messed with
10:47never do
10:48I think that can change
10:49I'll believe it
10:50when I see it
11:06isn't this like your
11:07your special resources
11:09period?
11:09Yeah, I hate that shit
11:11I just, I gotta listen
11:12to these again
11:15Alex
11:20Last time you listened
11:21I think multiple times
11:22Yeah, I know
11:23I just
11:24I keep listening to mine
11:26over and over again
11:26because it doesn't make sense
11:29It's like I'm missing something
11:33Do you
11:34Do you want to talk about it?
11:36Aren't we talking about it?
11:38I guess so
11:46Hey, what is that guy doing?
11:48Uh, chalking the field
11:51What is that machine?
11:52Like, I guess it's a
11:54chalk machine
11:56I gotta go
11:57Well, I don't know
11:58if it's called a chalk machine
12:00No, I just
12:02Look, don't
12:03listen too hard
12:04Okay?
12:05Yeah
12:25It seems like nothing
12:26until the hurricane
12:27Is that why you did it, Alex?
12:36I can't pretend to know
12:37what's going on
12:38in someone else's head
12:39It's poetry
12:40Most of the poets
12:42in our group
12:42write about dark
12:43and messed up things
12:44So, you had no idea
12:46that Hannah was
12:46crying out for help
12:48in her work
12:48or so the prosecution
12:49would have us believe
12:50But you expect the school
12:52to draw that conclusion?
12:54Well, it's their job
12:55isn't it?
12:56I mean, I'm sorry
12:57but I'm not a licensed therapist
12:58or a teacher
12:59Ryan, isn't it true
13:01that you worked with Hannah
13:03on many of her other poems?
13:05Some
13:06Yes
13:08And
13:09do you recognize these?
13:16Yes
13:17there are other poems
13:18from Hannah's journals
13:19Defense Exhibit F, Your Honor
13:22Ryan, did you work with Hannah
13:24on this poem?
13:25Yes
13:25I did
13:27Would you read this poem
13:28for the court, please?
13:36Oh, fruit forbidden
13:37so sour
13:38so sweet
13:39I have been banished
13:40from the garden
13:41and I don't think
13:42I miss it
13:43and yet
13:44I want another bite
13:48I like how you
13:49subverted the ode
13:49that's good
13:52some obvious metaphors there
13:55but there's a universality to it
13:58I'm just
14:01Sorry, uh, keep going
14:03I was going to say
14:04I'm just wondering
14:05if you shouldn't delve
14:06a little deeper
14:07but you said you had
14:08another one you wanted to read
14:08Uh, yeah
14:10Here
14:10I
14:11I
14:11I
14:12I
14:12I know it seems silly
14:13but the no phone rule
14:14is for a very good
14:20Justin Foley?
14:23Shut up
14:24are
14:26Hang on
14:28Holy
14:29shit
14:30He's your forbidden fruit?
14:32No, he's not
14:32Like, we just text sometimes
14:34Oh, you text
14:34And talk on the phone
14:36a little
14:37Since when?
14:38I don't know
14:39He texted me that day
14:40saying I'm sorry
14:41and then again
14:42the next day
14:43eventually I stopped
14:44ignoring him
14:44and it felt good
14:46to know that things
14:47didn't end up
14:48the way that people
14:48think they did
14:49What?
14:50You just told me
14:51to delve deeper
14:52Not into him
14:53You said yourself
14:54he ruined you
14:55I know
14:56I know
14:57I just
14:57Okay
14:58I get it
14:59He makes all our panties drop
15:01Wait
15:01You think Justin's hot?
15:03Of course I do
15:04I'm not blind
15:05or like chemically castrated
15:06You said
15:07and I'm quoting
15:08that he was the exemplar
15:10of athleticus douchebaggarus
15:12Which only makes him hotter
15:13I know, right?
15:14How is that even fair?
15:16No, all right
15:16No, enough
15:16You put your hand
15:17on the hot stove
15:18Owie
15:19You've learned your lesson
15:21Yes?
15:22Yes
15:26You are going to
15:27delete him from your phone
15:28and cleanse him
15:29from your heart
15:30Well, we should
15:31probably skip
15:32my next three poems
15:33Why?
15:34Why?
15:39It was the smile
15:40that did it first
15:41the way it seemed
15:42so easy
15:42for you to be so happy
15:45That smile
15:46I wish I'd never seen
15:48Stop
15:48love it
15:52And do you know
15:53who this poem
15:54is about, Ryan?
15:56Objection
15:56hearsay
15:57Declare and unavailable
15:58Your Honor
15:58I'll allow it
16:00And who is this poem
16:01about, Ryan?
16:06I don't know
16:10Ryan, why don't you read
16:11another poem for us?
16:14Fucking
16:15Ryan
16:16Shaver
16:17Every
16:18single kid
16:19who's gone to court
16:19has completely skated
16:22No one has admitted
16:23what they did
16:23It's just me
16:24I'm the only one
16:27Yeah
16:27That Ryan's a fucking tool
16:29Worst
16:29kind of gay
16:34I mean
16:34I didn't
16:35mean that
16:36because he's gay
16:36Oh, I did
16:37He's fucking
16:38shallow
16:39and pretentious
16:40and he fucking
16:40dresses gay
16:41every day
16:43Classic homo
16:45Chad's also gay
16:47FYI
16:48Hence
16:48he can say shit
16:49the rest of us can't
16:52And if you
16:53ever want to
16:53fuck with him
16:55there's an app
16:56for that
17:04I raised you
17:06three rectangular ones
17:10If I win
17:12we get to go outside
17:13No
17:14Come on
17:14just for like a while
17:15No
17:16I'm sorry
17:17You heard the boss, man
17:19Besides
17:20you get people
17:20looking for you
17:21on both sides
17:22of the law
17:24Since when
17:24is Tony Padilla
17:25afraid of shit
17:30like that
17:32Holy shit
17:34You are scared
17:36Why?
17:55My brothers and I
17:56we beat this guy up
17:57He ended up
17:59pressing charges
18:00a few weeks later
18:01That was my second strike
18:02Now I'm on probation
18:05If I get seen with you
18:07We get busted
18:10That means number three
18:11That means I do time
18:16Shit
18:23What the fuck
18:24happened to you?
18:26You don't gotta tell me
18:27No
18:27No
18:28It's
18:31It's cool
18:32It's
18:34I just
18:35basically blew through
18:36most of my money
18:38The first few weeks
18:39I was out
18:40living in like motels
18:42and shit
18:44That oxy was like
18:45taking the edge off
18:46But
18:48all these pills
18:49are so pricey
18:50and
18:51that heroin's cheap
18:55So you know
18:56here I am
19:00Shitting myself
19:01in Clay Jensen's bathroom
19:10Put your fucking shoes
19:11on
19:12Put your fucking shoes on
19:17So your parents
19:18weren't pissed
19:18about yesterday?
19:20No
19:21They were disappointed
19:23Disappointed
19:24I hate that shit
19:27Plus they want me
19:28to go to group therapy
19:29talk to someone
19:31You can always
19:32talk to me
19:33That's what I said
19:35Yeah
19:36I won't
19:38try to kiss you
19:39every time
19:39or anything
19:41Yeah
19:44About that
19:45I
19:45No
19:45I mean
19:46I
19:46We don't have to
19:48We don't have to be
19:49about that
19:50ever again
19:51So
19:53Okay
19:55Thanks
19:59I listened to the tapes
20:01Clay finally
20:02gave them to me
20:05Jesus
20:09Are you
20:10Are you okay?
20:12Yeah
20:13Are you?
20:16You never told me
20:17the whole story
20:17about Bryce
20:19If I wanted to talk
20:20about that
20:20I'd go to stupid
20:21group therapy
20:23Okay
20:25Yeah
20:25I got it
20:26I don't even know
20:27the whole story
20:27of myself
20:29I don't
20:30remember all of it
20:31Yeah
20:33Me neither
20:37Here we go
20:40I think I saw
20:41one of those
20:41chalk machine things
20:42in here somewhere
20:44Which would mean
20:46The pictures
20:47were taken at school
20:49And?
20:51It would be huge
20:52for your case
20:56And?
21:02And
21:02holy shit
21:03there it is
21:17You gotta find that room
21:19Do I put that target
21:20on my back
21:21again and again
21:22Or do I face
21:23a lifetime
21:23of wanting
21:24the thing
21:25I should not have
21:26You've read
21:27three of these poems
21:28now so I'll
21:29ask you again
21:29Who are these poems
21:31about?
21:32Objection
21:32Asked and answered
21:33Your honor
21:34I'll allow it
21:43Who's the poem
21:44about Ryan?
21:47Justin Foley
21:50So
21:51after Justin Foley
21:53in her own words
21:55ruined her
21:56and destroyed her reputation
21:58she maintained contact
21:59with him?
22:00Yes
22:01And kept writing poetry
22:03about him?
22:04Yes
22:04Nearly a half dozen poems
22:07Any further mention
22:08of depression
22:08or cries for help?
22:12No
22:13And to your knowledge
22:15did she maintain
22:17personal contact
22:19with Justin Foley?
22:20I
22:21I don't know
22:43You texted me you were here?
22:45Never thinking you would like
22:46come visit
22:47Yeah
22:48Well
22:51Did you just feel
22:52like a latte?
22:54Yeah actually
22:55do you think
22:56they have Gatorade?
22:57I'm guessing no
22:59Yeah I've actually
23:01never been in here
23:02Well neither have
23:03any of your friends
23:04so it's safe
23:05Well that's not
23:06I just
23:11We haven't really
23:12talked in a while
23:12so
23:13I thought maybe
23:15I wanted to see you
23:16that's all
23:16Well you see me
23:17at school
23:18Yeah but
23:19you know how that is
23:21I don't
23:22really
23:22how was it?
23:23Look I don't
23:24fucking like it either
23:26but
23:27once you get tagged
23:28at Liberty
23:28that's what you got
23:29Your tag seems
23:31a little easier
23:31to live with than mine
23:32Look I said
23:33I was sorry
23:35I've been saying
23:36it for months
23:38Texting it
23:38mostly
23:39Well
23:40I am
23:44Sorry I'm late
23:45Why hello Justin
23:47Uh hey
23:48Hey
23:49What's up
23:51Yeah we were just
23:52we were just
23:53finishing up
23:53some homework
23:54stuff
23:54so
23:55I'll see you
23:56at school
23:57Sure
23:57Talk to you at school
24:05He just showed up
24:07I didn't ask him to
24:11I know
24:13Okay I know
24:14Leave me alone
24:15Cleanse him
24:15Hannah cleanse
24:17Cleanse
24:18I mean she wrote
24:19about longing
24:20about love
24:21and the lack of love
24:22Why didn't you publish
24:23any of those poems?
24:24Because they weren't
24:25any good
24:26Ryan be honest
24:27You published the poem
24:29you did
24:29not because it was
24:30her truth
24:30but because you
24:31thought it would
24:32shock the most
24:33didn't you?
24:39No
24:41She wasn't happy
24:42She was extremely
24:44upset and hurting
24:45She wrote about
24:46Justin and
24:47other boys
24:48because she was lonely
24:51It's not about
24:52them
24:52it's about
24:53what they represented
24:55what they did to her
24:56and what you're doing
24:57to her
24:57No further questions
24:59Your Honor
24:59Thank you Ryan
25:00Redirect Your Honor
25:02Ryan
25:04Why do you think
25:04Hannah continued
25:05texting with Justin?
25:08Justin Foley
25:08was a bad decision
25:10and we all make
25:11bad decisions
25:13especially when
25:14we're desperately alone
25:17I think we should
25:18head back now
25:18No
25:19It's so nice out
25:21It's fresh air
25:23some vitamin D
25:25Yeah
25:26Some
25:26Some
25:27Oh shit
25:29Oh come on
25:30Oh shit
25:35Sorry
25:36Jesus Christ man
25:37Don't fucking talk
25:38to people
25:38I was just apologizing
25:40to the purple
25:41tracksuit lady
25:42I don't get this
25:45whole secret agent
25:46routine
25:47Oh really
25:48You don't get
25:48that there are
25:49some people
25:49who might not
25:50be happy
25:50to have you back
25:55Jessica wants me
25:56back
25:57That's all that
25:58fucking matters
26:00Yeah
26:01Yeah
26:02Right
26:03That's what she said
26:04Right
26:04I didn't talk to her
26:05Clay did
26:07He said she wants
26:08me here
26:11I don't think
26:12I don't think
26:14it's that simple
26:16What?
26:17What is it?
26:18Does that car
26:18look familiar to you?
26:20Whose is it?
26:21I don't know
26:21but obviously
26:22they go to our school
26:23so you got your wish
26:25everybody's gonna
26:25know you're back
26:33I'm glad you came
26:34Me too
26:36That was a lot to take
26:38Well today was a good day
26:39It can get much worse
26:41believe me
26:42I believe you
26:44I'll see you tomorrow
26:50It's nice
26:51seeing you two together
26:54Nice for the jury too
26:55right?
26:56That's not what I'm thinking
26:56Well I am
26:58Okay
26:59I understand
27:01I'm worried about you
27:03though
27:04It's easy
27:05to fall into old patterns
27:07To rely on someone
27:09who has proven unreliable
27:13Don't worry
27:16I've moved on
27:18A lot of us
27:19keep holding on
27:20even when we should
27:21let go
27:31Shit
27:32Floors don't match
27:35And no couch
27:37Damn it
27:38There has to be some
27:40athletics room
27:41somewhere
27:42Maybe Justin
27:43could still help
27:47You would say that
27:49What does that mean?
27:52How are you so quick
27:53to forgive him?
27:54I didn't say
27:54I forgave him
27:55Why do girls
27:56even like guys
27:57like Justin?
27:58I mean why did you?
27:59He's always been
28:00an asshole
28:01His best friend
28:02is a rapist
28:02I didn't know
28:03that then
28:05You were warned
28:06Kat warned you
28:07So it's my fault?
28:10I'm not saying that
28:12What are you saying
28:13then?
28:15I just
28:18I don't understand
28:20why people love
28:21people who aren't
28:22good for them
28:22I don't know
28:23what to tell you
28:25We don't choose
28:26who we fall for
28:30Yeah
28:33Tell me about it
28:59You sure it was Justin?
29:01That's what I heard
29:03Hey why would he be
29:04with Tony?
29:04You think he came
29:05back to testify?
29:06Fuck if I know
29:07I don't care
29:08Alright let's sit up
29:12State guys coming
29:13down tomorrow
29:13to do the screens
29:15So if that is
29:16a concern for you
29:17see me in my office
29:19Hey
29:21All set for tomorrow?
29:23Court?
29:24You want me to come
29:24with you?
29:24That's alright
29:25coach
29:26Thanks
29:29What do you think
29:30this Y came back
29:30here?
29:31I don't know
29:32Drop it
29:33Go
29:34Everything's fine
29:36Yeah you keep
29:37saying that
29:37You keep telling me
29:39you got shit
29:39taken care of
29:40but I don't see it
29:41And why the fuck
29:42do you care
29:43exactly?
29:45You man
29:46Us
29:46State
29:49All taken care of
29:51Go
29:51Get your synthetic pee
29:56Zach
29:56Are you coming?
29:57No
29:57I'm good brother
29:58Don't eat it
29:59Not gonna tell on us
30:00are you?
30:01Why
30:02You think I'm a rat?
30:04No
30:04Of course not
30:05I just wish
30:06I had your genes
30:07man
30:09You did alright
30:11You flatter me
30:12Got your back
30:13brother
30:17Thanks buddy
30:18Yeah
30:24Thanks ladies
30:25I'm probably
30:26overthinking it
30:27but not
30:27every girl
30:28gets to meet
30:28the parents
30:29right?
30:30True
30:30Later girl
30:31Bye
30:32Hey Jess
30:34Great work today
30:36Thanks
30:37Sorry we had
30:37to end early
30:38I have to go
30:39home and change
30:39for dinner
30:39with Bryce's
30:40parents
30:41I have no
30:42idea what
30:42I'm gonna wear
30:43Yeah
30:45You know
30:46I'm pretty sure
30:46you could wear
30:47anything Chloe
30:47and they'll
30:48still love you
30:49Hey Jess
30:51We'll find you
30:52a man
30:52okay
30:53You just have
30:53to let me
30:54help you
30:54I mean it
30:55I kind of
30:56pride myself
30:56on my
30:57matchmaking
30:58Look Chloe
30:58I don't want
30:59a fucking
30:59boyfriend
31:00okay
31:02The last thing
31:03I need in my
31:04life right now
31:04is some
31:06fucking guy
31:07and you
31:08and you
31:09the fact that
31:09you keep
31:10like offering
31:10that
31:12means you're
31:13just as
31:13fucking
31:14clueless
31:14as I thought
31:24I was trying
31:25to be Hannah's
31:26friend
31:27I needed a
31:28friend as much
31:29as she did
31:33Um
31:34Hi
31:37Hi
31:38I um
31:40I was friends
31:40with Hannah
31:41and I let her
31:41down and
31:42I'm sorry
31:43but I just
31:44wanted to come
31:44by and say
31:45that what
31:45they're doing
31:45to her
31:46is bullshit
31:49Thank you
31:52Can I
31:55Can I ask
31:56you some
31:56questions
31:57about
31:57Hannah's
31:58journals
31:59Oh
32:00um
32:03Yes
32:04of course
32:13She mentions
32:15the clubhouse
32:16in three
32:16different poems
32:19Something
32:20changed
32:20after the
32:21clubhouse
32:23I imagined
32:24myself for a
32:25moment
32:25one of the
32:25elite
32:26but I never
32:26should have
32:26gone to
32:27the clubhouse
32:28In his
32:29lucky letter
32:29jacket
32:30Then that's
32:31gotta be
32:31Justin
32:31right?
32:32It could
32:33be
32:34I don't
32:35know
32:35I don't
32:37remember
32:37anything
32:37about a
32:38clubhouse
32:38Damn it
32:40Okay
32:41uh
32:41what about
32:42the intruder
32:44He comes
32:45up
32:45several times
32:47too
32:47There's a
32:47whole poem
32:48about him
32:49Sometimes
32:50the intruder
32:50doesn't need
32:51to break
32:51a window
32:52sometimes
32:53they already
32:53have the
32:54key
32:55Do you
32:55know this
32:56one?
32:57No
32:59I think
33:00it's about
33:00the bullying
33:01at the
33:01school
33:03The house
33:03is on fire
33:05Her lungs
33:06are filling
33:06up with
33:07smoke
33:07and the
33:07intruder
33:08it's this
33:09other Hannah
33:10that everyone
33:11thought they
33:11knew
33:12That makes
33:18sense
33:23This is fucking
33:24useless Ryan
33:24We write and
33:26write about shit
33:27and nothing
33:27ever changes
33:28I'm done
33:29Hannah
33:30you have a
33:30gift
33:31I'm not just
33:31gonna let you
33:32throw that away
33:32A gift
33:34You say that
33:34so easily
33:35like you
33:35know
33:36I do
33:36Yeah well
33:37I wish
33:37I did
33:39I wish
33:39I didn't
33:40need people
33:40to tell me
33:40that I'm
33:41good
33:41or
33:42that they
33:42like me
33:43but I
33:43do
33:44That's great
33:45stuff
33:46That's what
33:46you should
33:47write about
33:47No
33:48Enough
33:48writing
33:49about my
33:49emotions
33:50Can we
33:50just eat
33:50them
33:51Yeah we
33:52can totally
33:53eat them
33:56Vanilla
33:56or mint
33:57chocolate chip
33:58Please
33:58Vanilla
33:59is not
34:00a flavor
34:00it's an
34:00admission
34:01of defeat
34:08Hannah was
34:08so talented
34:10but she
34:11didn't know
34:11it
34:13and she
34:14wrote out
34:14of love
34:14out of need
34:20And I
34:21wanted to
34:21show her
34:22that the
34:22rush of
34:23people
34:23loving
34:23your work
34:24is just
34:24as good
34:24as love
34:28So I
34:29stole her
34:29poem
34:38It was
34:39just one
34:39poem
34:48But I
34:49was wrong
34:50Sorry I
34:51can't be
34:51more
34:51helpful
34:54Sometimes I
34:56fantasize
34:57that all the
34:57answers are
34:58in these
34:59torn out
35:00pages
35:00Oh I
35:02I don't
35:03think so
35:03I
35:05I
35:06I
35:06I
35:07I imagine
35:07those are
35:07just false
35:07starts
35:08or
35:09things
35:10she's ashamed
35:11to even
35:12admit to
35:12herself
35:14Why did
35:14she keep in
35:15contact with
35:16Justin?
35:17Loneliness
35:20it can be
35:20intense at
35:21our age
35:22It's not
35:23just at
35:23your age
35:30What she
35:31needed most
35:32was love
35:33human
35:34connection
36:02He didn't
36:03quit
36:05cheerleading
36:05because
36:06Justin's
36:07back
36:10And our
36:10news travels
36:11fast in
36:12these halls
36:13Don't care
36:14You don't
36:14care that
36:15he's back
36:15No
36:16You know
36:17where he's
36:17staying
36:21Justin needs
36:22help too
36:24He should
36:24be enrolled
36:25in school
36:25The only
36:27address I
36:27have of
36:28him is
36:28his dad
36:29in Sacramento
36:33Oh well
36:33Just
36:34I'll
36:35be honest
36:38I know
36:39what it's
36:39like
36:39to try
36:41to be
36:41strong
36:42and keep
36:43your problems
36:44all of you
36:45But it
36:46does not
36:46work
36:49You don't
36:50have to
36:50talk to me
36:53But talk
36:54to someone
36:56If I don't have to
36:56talk to you
36:57can I go?
37:07Justin's
37:07never met
37:08his dad
37:10His mom
37:10lives with
37:11some drug dealer
37:11named Seth
37:27Do you think
37:28she likes her?
37:29Your mother?
37:30Yeah
37:30Sure
37:34Chloe's a great
37:35girl
37:35Very pretty
37:37She's got a
37:38brain too
37:38Her grades
37:39are better
37:39than mine
37:42She's loyal
37:44Yeah
37:46That's important
37:47You do good
37:50Thanks dad
37:52There we go
37:55Wow
37:57You seem quite
37:58happy
37:58the two of you
37:59Oh yeah
38:00absolutely
38:01He's so sweet
38:02to me
38:02like all the time
38:03Sweet
38:04Yeah
38:05That's good
38:06to hear
38:17Cheerleading
38:18Full contact
38:19sport
38:20I see
38:25How do you know
38:26about Justin?
38:27Because Jessica
38:28told me when we
38:29ditched with your
38:29car yesterday
38:31I said that
38:32Clay wouldn't
38:32found him
38:33Clay?
38:34Yeah
38:35Okay
38:36Well do you know
38:37anything about
38:37like where
38:38he's living
38:38or why
38:39he's back?
38:40No
38:40Zach
38:40I really
38:41don't fucking
38:42care
38:42Why is
38:42everything
38:43always about
38:44fucking
38:44Justin?
38:44Oh
38:45Relax
38:45dude
38:46It's
38:46not
38:49Hey
38:50Are you
38:51okay?
38:52Yeah
38:52Jessica
38:53and I kissed
38:54I kissed yesterday
38:56Seriously?
38:57Dude
38:58That's
38:58That's great
39:01Is that great?
39:02Yeah
39:03Well but then
39:03she freaked out
39:04on me
39:06And now
39:06it's just
39:07It's totally
39:08weird
39:08Yeah
39:10I mean
39:11It makes sense
39:11that you're
39:12freaked out
39:13Yeah
39:14But I just
39:15I still think
39:16it has something
39:16to do with Justin
39:18And you know
39:18what's the most
39:19fucked up?
39:21It's when we kissed
39:22I couldn't even feel anything
39:25You mean
39:26like emotionally
39:27or
39:27No
39:27like
39:28down there
39:29I was just numb
39:31Huh
39:32I haven't really felt
39:34anything
39:34like post-coma
39:36Have you tried porn?
39:38Yeah
39:38of course
39:39I've tried porn
39:39but I thought
39:40with a real person
39:41maybe it would
39:41you know
39:43Yeah
39:43Well dude
39:44honestly
39:45it'll happen
39:46Just gotta find
39:47the right girl
39:48Yeah?
39:49Yeah
39:50Alright
39:50Well let me know
39:51when you find yours
39:53Maybe she's got a friend
39:54who's into
39:55scrawny and broken
39:57Well not broken forever
40:00Let's go
40:00Come on
40:06I'm sorry
40:07Sherry
40:08He went to the movies
40:09with his dad
40:11He must have
40:12forgotten to text you
40:13Yeah
40:14he must have
40:16I'm happy that you two
40:18are friends again
40:20I know you've been
40:20been through a great deal
40:22Yeah
40:22we have
40:23I think Clay's still
40:25working on trying to
40:25forgive me though
40:26Well
40:27he asked you to come
40:28study
40:29Yeah
40:30Actually why don't you
40:31stay
40:32and wait for him
40:34Sure
40:40Can I ask you a question
40:41for a case
40:42that I'm working on
40:45Let's say
40:45a boy and a girl
40:47have been texting
40:48a lot
40:49and then all of a sudden
40:50it stops
40:52What would that mean?
40:54Well they were probably
40:55dating right
40:56and they broke up
40:57What if they never dated?
40:59I don't know
40:59That's
41:00that's probably
41:01just a hookup
41:03Hannah was desperate
41:05for human connection
41:06and I betrayed her
41:11I guess I left her
41:13even more lonely
41:13than she was before
41:19And I guess I know
41:20how she feels
41:41How'd it go today?
41:43Um
41:44not great actually
41:46but you're fine
41:47I didn't say anything
41:47if that's what you're worried about
41:48I wasn't
41:49I
41:51I just wanted to know
41:52how you were doing
41:53Are you here alone?
41:56You want to join us?
41:58Us?
42:00Caleb
42:01Ryan
42:01Ryan
42:02Caleb
42:03Nice to meet you
42:04Nice
42:06handshake
42:07Wow
42:09Are you sure
42:10you don't want to join us?
42:12Yeah actually
42:12no I was just leaving
42:13I got set up
42:14Apparently my date
42:15joined the app today
42:16He's a noob
42:17so you know
42:19Forget him
42:20Stay
42:20Plus I want some dirt
42:22I'm Mr. Perfect here
42:23Oh he knows about our past
42:25That's barely any of it
42:27You're not interested
42:28in high school bullshit
42:29If it's about you
42:30I am
42:32Come on Ryan
42:33Seriously
42:35Stay
42:38What Hannah needed
42:39was a friend
42:41And I wasn't that
42:42And I wasn't that
42:44For the longest time
42:47Nothing was the same
42:49How long I slept
42:50What I ate
42:52What I wore
42:54I mean my clothes
42:56didn't feel like me anymore
42:57You know just bright colors
42:58made me feel like a fraud
42:59And my black clothes
43:00didn't seem dark enough
43:01And just nothing
43:03seemed to fit
43:03Just literally everything
43:04felt like a lie
43:07And nothing I did
43:07seemed to help
43:09No drink
43:10No drug
43:12Well
43:13I didn't actually
43:14try every drug
43:15But let me tell you
43:16We just had me crying
43:17and all in my feelings
43:19You know
43:20The one thing
43:21that did seem to help
43:21was all of you
43:24And I'm thankful today
43:25that just
43:27coming here
43:27and talking to you
43:28has been the thing
43:29that's brought me back
43:30to who I am
43:32You know
43:32a loud
43:33pushy
43:34pain in the ass
43:37But you know
43:38you love me
43:39And I love you
43:42Thank you
43:50Took you long enough
43:54How did you know
43:57About me
43:58Um
43:59I didn't
44:00I just figured
44:02in case those rumors
44:03were bullshit
44:04which they obviously were
44:05that I'd be a friendly face
44:07Friendly and
44:09slightly stalkerish
44:10I don't stalk
44:12I lurk
44:13Oh okay
44:14It worked didn't it
44:18Yeah
44:19Yeah
44:35What?
44:37Where's the music down?
44:41Hey
44:42Sorry
44:42What?
44:43That's um
44:45Some music
44:47It's punk
44:49Oh
44:50They sound
44:53angry
44:54They are
44:55Oh
44:56Okay
44:58Uh
44:59What are they
45:02so angry about?
45:03Everything
45:05I see
45:07Yeah
45:12Mr. Barber
45:13called today
45:13From up the street
45:15He said
45:16he saw
45:17you and your friend
45:17Cyrus shooting guns
45:19on his property
45:20What?
45:22Shooting guns
45:25That wasn't me
45:27I
45:27I don't know
45:28That old guy's crazy
45:30I guess
45:30No
45:31He said it was you
45:32That's why he called me
45:33and not the police
45:37Oh wait
45:38Does he mean
45:39Does he mean Cyrus' BB gun?
45:42Is that what he's talking about?
45:44A BB gun?
45:45It's like this
45:46this old thing Cyrus has
45:47It's like a toy
45:48You know
45:49It's not real
45:50Oh
45:51That's what he saw
45:52Okay
45:54Hmm
45:55Still
45:55You know how I feel
45:56about guns
45:57of any kind
45:57Yeah
45:58No I do
45:58I do
45:59And I even
46:00I told Cyrus that
46:01which is why
46:01we went to
46:01Mr. Barber's field
46:02just to be extra careful
46:03And did Cyrus
46:05give you that music
46:07and that shirt
46:09We made the shirts
46:12ourselves
46:12You know
46:13They're quite bold
46:15I hope you save them
46:16for the appropriate audience
46:18and not school
46:21Yeah
46:22Mmhmm
46:25Okay
46:28Wow
46:34Don't stay up too late
46:35I won't
46:38Good night
46:38Love you
46:39Good night
46:51Hey there
46:53Hi
46:55I think there's something
46:57wrong with your camera
46:58Oh yeah
47:00It's broken
47:01So
47:02What's your name
47:03Cutie?
47:05Um
47:06My name is
47:08Zach
47:09Well hi
47:12Zach
47:14If I can't see you
47:16How will I know
47:17how big and hard you are?
47:21Well I can describe myself
47:23Yeah
47:25I'm 6'3
47:26I'm jacked
47:27Because I work out a lot
47:29Sounds like a hot butt
47:32Do you like this?
47:36Yeah I do like that
47:42Yeah that's good
47:43Oh yeah
47:45Oh
47:48Oh
47:49Oh
47:50Oh
47:54God
47:56Fuck
47:57God
47:58Damn it
48:01What's wrong?
48:03You don't like?
48:04No I
48:05I mean yes
48:06I do
48:06I
48:08No I do like it
48:09It's not you
48:10It's me
48:11I just
48:13I don't work
48:17And I'm not
48:18I'm not 6'3
48:19I'm not jacked
48:20I'm
48:22I'm really skinny
48:23And funny looking
48:25And my dick's broken
48:27Okay
48:28Um
48:29Honey
48:31How old are you?
48:3425
48:34Uh huh
48:37Look it's 18 or older
48:40Sorry kiddo
48:50I'm sorry
48:51I didn't get your text message
48:53The procedure is
48:54If you see the car
48:55You go through the window
48:56Your whole family
48:57Has the same car
48:58I thought it was you
48:59Mine is smaller
48:59Okay anyways
49:00Look I made an excuse
49:02To go to your room
49:03And use your bathroom
49:03So that Tony could leave
49:05And Justin's been asleep
49:06Ever since
49:07Well
49:09At least he didn't get discovered
49:11Yeah
49:12Um
49:12How about that?
49:22When were you gonna tell me
49:23Someone saw you
49:24When were you gonna tell me
49:26About Jess
49:28I talked to Tony
49:29She doesn't want me here
49:31Does she?
49:32It's complicated
49:33You lied to me
49:34No
49:34I
49:34It's the truth
49:35Jessica just
49:37Doesn't realize it yet
49:39She'll change her mind
49:40You just
49:40You have to get sober
49:41And she'll see
49:42Fuck that
49:45I'm wasting my time
49:48She kept your postcard
49:52It's how we found you
49:55She kept it
49:56Justin
49:58Nancy
49:58I'll always love you
49:59Sid
50:01Why would she keep that?
50:07I really did love her
50:13So stay
50:22Do you want to know
50:23Why Hannah wrote these poems?
50:26She was reaching out
50:27She was desperate to be heard
50:29To connect
50:33And people took that lifeline
50:35And they twisted it
50:38Hey kiddo
50:41You okay?
50:42Yeah
50:45I was
50:46I was thinking maybe
50:49I'd try to sleep in here tonight
50:51Really?
50:52Really
50:55It's wonderful
50:57Yeah
50:57Well
50:58It's fine
51:01You want me to tuck you in?
51:03Or is that silly?
51:07Silly
51:11They took her own story
51:12Away from her
51:17And she fought to get it back
51:25Who are you?
51:27Kevin Porter
51:28Guidance counselor
51:29At Liberty High
51:31I'm looking for your son
51:32Look what can I tell you
51:33He ran away
51:35You don't want to know
51:36How he's doing?
51:37Or is he alive?
51:38He can take care of himself
51:39Okay?
51:40Always has
51:41Ma'am
51:41He's 17 years old
51:44Who the fuck are you?
51:49I'm Justin's guidance counselor
51:50Kevin Porter
51:51And you are?
51:52I'm the one that punk stole a thousand dollars from
51:56So you gonna get me my money back or what?
51:58Well I'm not really here for that
52:00Then I suggest you get the fuck off my property
52:04Listen
52:04Justin
52:05He needs a home
52:07Well he had a home
52:08And he fucked it up
52:10Case closed
52:11Goodbye
52:11Okay
52:12I wish you would back off
52:14What?
52:15Don't do that
52:31But in the end
52:32The story they told was so loud
52:34That it's all that she could hear
52:37And she started to believe it
52:38And forgot who she was
52:45Fuck
52:48It's easy to let that happen
52:50To lose yourself
52:54To believe that no one could ever know you
52:57Or love you
53:08And that you're the only person that knows what you're going through
53:18And you convince yourself
53:20It's going to get better
53:23And then it doesn't
53:44For help finding crisis resources
53:46Visit 13reasonswhy.info
53:54So
56:13Well done, Ed.
56:14Well done.
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