00:28Transcription by CastingWords
00:38Transcription by CastingWords
01:06Transcription by CastingWords
01:08Oh Margaret
01:10I forget what about
01:12There are so many
01:14Exchanges of views these days
01:21I thought things had moved on
01:24They've moved on alright
01:25He's moved on
01:28On to the next one
01:36He can't help himself
01:39My bright epic little snapper
01:49I've moved on
02:07On to the next one
02:20I don't know.
02:50You've never told me about the wallpaper.
02:52The rogues' gallery. Isn't it fun?
02:56I did it to remind Princess Margaret that her family has as many skeletons in the cupboard as anyone else's.
03:03House of Windsor, House of Horrors, Mon Egg.
03:07I hope she saw the funny side.
03:10God, no.
03:11She said as long as that wallpaper was there, she'd never come to the house.
03:14Not that she needed an excuse.
03:17She always hated it here.
03:19She considers it as ugly, misshapen, and common as me.
03:24The failure of our marriage.
03:27Could not be better encapsulated by the two houses, the two dwellings,
03:31in which she and I are most comfortable.
03:35Hers is some insect-infested gin palace given to her by fawning sycophants.
03:44And this is mine.
03:49Oh, you too.
03:51I know.
03:53And poor you to get caught up in it.
03:57My advice would be to escape while you still can.
04:01I'll never be able to give you what you want.
04:04She'll never divorce me.
04:07She might if she falls in love with someone else.
04:12What makes you think that'll happen?
04:15Well, you did.
04:18Didn't you?
04:23You're right.
04:28I did.
04:30I did.
04:53I did.
05:56The smaller parties holding the balance of power, both Nova and the Tories look unable to reach the magic number
06:02of 318.
06:05I'm sure it was her.
06:09The Thing.
06:10She has a name, you know.
06:13Yes.
06:14And, um, I had been told it, but I can only remember, so I call her The Thing.
06:21Lucy Lindsay Hall.
06:22Mm-hmm.
06:24The Thing.
06:25And the car she climbed into outside looked very much like Tony's.
06:32I suppose they're in Sussex now.
06:35Ugly little house.
06:38Dredge would look ashamed.
06:44And he thinks I'll take the humiliation lying down, does he?
06:49Well, he's got another thing coming.
06:53May I speak frankly now?
06:55As a friend.
06:58I can think of several couples of whom it could be observed that having not found the contentment
07:04they desired within matrimony have chosen to live apart and appeared happier.
07:10Tony and I will never let go of one another.
07:13And it's not just because divorce is incompatible with my faith.
07:17Because this is just how we like it.
07:24War is our love.
07:26Brutal fight to the death is our mating dance.
07:29And I speak for both of us when I say we wouldn't want it any other way.
07:37Contentment is dull.
07:39And Tony and I are anything but dull.
07:42You can now say with mere certainty that neither party will achieve a majority.
07:47So, the clock is now ticking for 10 feet to firm an alliance with Jeremy Falk's Liberal Party.
07:53If he can't, you might rise to a return to power for Harold Wilson,
07:56if you can call a minority government power.
07:59What a mess.
08:01I mean, honestly, can you remember a time when the country was in worse shape?
08:04When one had as little confidence in one's leaders?
08:07Speaking of bad shape.
08:08One wakes up in the morning flinching.
08:11How could matters get any worse?
08:12What more could possibly go wrong?
08:14And then you come down to breakfast, you see the newspapers,
08:16and you realise they've done it again.
08:19Margaret's birthday is coming up.
08:21I mean, right now, the United Kingdom is the equivalent
08:23of a patient dying on the operating table and the surgeons.
08:27No, the butchers.
08:28No, sorry, the murderers responsible for causing that death
08:31are seeking re-election.
08:32Instead of throwing them in jail,
08:34there are people like lemmings queuing up to extend their bloody contracts.
08:38She called me late last night.
08:40Said she had something important to discuss.
08:43Who?
08:44Margaret.
08:45She's run out of tonic?
08:47No.
08:48She's been knocked up by one of the footmen?
08:50Philip.
08:51You wouldn't put it past her.
08:53I worry it's Tony.
08:55I'm taking for Ted Heath to form an alliance with...
08:59Ready?
09:03Mr. Heath came to tell me that he was unable to form a co-relation with the Ulster Unionists
09:07or the Liberals, which left him with no alternative but to resign.
09:11At which point, I don't mind admitting, I let out an unconstitutional cheer.
09:15Huzzah.
09:16Privately, I hope.
09:17Well, it's not his politics I object to, so much as his company.
09:20And now, Mr. Wilson, who I must say looks very tired, not at all well,
09:25is back again as Prime Minister of a minority government.
09:28And the best we can hope for is that he can survive until the next election in the auction.
09:48I have asked you all here, my family, on the occasion of my birthday.
09:56Happy birthday, Margot.
09:58You don't notice that my dear husband is not at my side on this joyous occasion.
10:02It is because he is now betraying me, and not just in private, but openly in public, too.
10:08And I don't think we should take this lying down.
10:11We.
10:11Yes, we, Mummy.
10:13If Tony insults me by implication, he's insulting the whole of the family, too.
10:17I'm not sure I followed that logic.
10:19What would you like us to do?
10:20Send a clear signal to the world whose side you're on.
10:24And impose sanctions.
10:27What?
10:27What kind of sanctions?
10:29No more invitations to royal events.
10:32No more royal photographs.
10:33No more access to crown property.
10:36It's him where it hurts.
10:38Punish him.
10:40Draw blood.
10:40Where is he now?
10:41He left the country this morning to make one of his films.
10:46Oh, Ghana, or did you say Guinea?
10:49Gabon.
10:49Ah.
10:50With the thing.
10:51The what?
10:52I'll explain later.
10:53I rather liked his last film.
10:55Is it the one about dwarves?
10:56I'll tell you what I liked about it.
10:57Yes, it's sore.
10:58It had compassion.
11:00It had kindness.
11:02In fact, I think that's the thing I most like about Tony.
11:04And his wit.
11:05Yes.
11:06And the fact that he's generous enough to flirt with his mother-in-law.
11:10He'll throw up.
11:12He cares.
11:13All right, Mummy.
11:14He has a heart.
11:15Yeah, not that his wife or children have noticed.
11:17Does his charity work for the disabled?
11:19And the way he was at Aberdeen.
11:21Yes.
11:22He's the mother-in-law.
11:32Why do you do this, Mummy?
11:35Why do you all do this?
11:37Why do you always, always take a side?
11:41This is my birthday party.
11:45And when I tell you that my husband is out of the country,
11:49betraying me with another woman,
11:51instead of supporting me
11:55and condemning him,
11:57you just sit here, praising him to the sky.
12:04My family.
12:06My own flesh and blood.
12:08My birthday.
12:15Perhaps we'll just stick to the back teeth of you
12:17and have sympathy for him.
12:19Philip, well...
12:21Am I wrong?
12:23Like, hands up anyone who thinks I'm wrong.
12:26Anne.
12:33We should eat these before they get cold, shouldn't we?
12:35Mrs. Joy.
12:36She'll be all right.
12:37I hate them.
12:38I hate them, I hate them, I hate them.
12:40I hate them.
12:50You might even enjoy it.
12:52Let's go.
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