- 9 hours ago
Chasing Her Ashes: The Fallen Arbiter Episode Fantasy Drama
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00:00In Midgard, I used my power to force Sigrid into marriage, tearing him away from his beloved.
00:05After death, he ascended as the Arbiter of Helheim, imprisoning and torturing me.
00:09For a hundred years, he made sure every soul in Helheim knew I was his wife.
00:14Then, upon finding his dead childhood companion, he drove dozens of hell-forged spikes into my body.
00:20He declared, my heart was vile, my hands stained with the lives of the innocent, and he flooded my soul
00:25with darkness.
00:27Then, before every watching eye, he gave me two choices.
00:30Remain and become his companion's servant as penance, or enter the Hall of Anguish as a corrupted soul,
00:36to suffer endlessly and be reborn into servitude across every life, never to know a good death.
00:41He knew I feared pain, feared suffering, but even if I had to endure every torment, even if my next
00:46life would know no peace,
00:47I could not bear to remain at his side one moment longer.
00:50After a hundred years imprisoned beside Sigrid, I was finally released from that lightless dungeon.
00:55When the iron chains fell from my pierced collarbones, I thought I would feel lighter.
00:59Instead, all I felt was the dense, crushing wave of pain across my shoulders.
01:03Seeing me hesitate, a death guard shoved me hard from behind.
01:06My lord, someone to the one who wants to sit here.
01:10Move!
01:11Don't be late with my drink.
01:13His expression was stone cold.
01:15He had no fear that I would disobey, because Sigrid had placed a curse on me.
01:19From the moment I entered Helheim, I was every soul's dog.
01:21Dog, summoned, dismissed, forbidden to resist.
01:24Now, I lowered my eyes, swallowed the pain, and walked out of the Arbiter's Hall.
01:29The moment I entered the city, a force seized me and wrenched me down.
01:35I crashed hard to the ground.
01:36The wounds on my shoulders tore open, another bloom of blood and rot.
01:40Sorin, standing at Sigrid's side, let a flash of pleasure cross her eyes.
01:44Then she twisted her face into fear and reddened her eyes.
01:48Sigrid, what did I ever do to make Rowan hate me so much,
01:52that she would sever my limbs and have me tortured to death?
01:55The moment she spoke, Sigrid's gaze turned to ice.
01:57Don't be afraid.
01:59I'll make her pay.
02:00He never merely said things.
02:02The moment the words left his lips, he drove dozens of hellforged spikes into my forelimbs.
02:06The agony hit like a collapsing sky.
02:08I couldn't hold back my scream.
02:10Every wound Sorin bore, I will return to you a hundredfold.
02:15Rowan's heart is rotten.
02:17She has taken lives without mercy.
02:20Her crimes are unforgivable.
02:22Under Sorin's cues, the crowd began to point and condemn.
02:24A woman like her deserves to be cast into the deepest abyss of Niphim, never to be reborn.
02:31Hearing their words, Sigrid poured more darkness into my soul, his voice cold as iron.
02:36I give you two choices.
02:37Either remain and serve Sorda in penance, or enter the Hall of Anguish as a corrupted soul,
02:43be reborn into slavery across every life, and never know a good death.
02:47The pain was so absolute, I couldn't form a single word.
02:50Of course.
02:51You're too selfish, too cowardly.
02:54Why would you ever choose the cycle of Yggdorik?
02:57He turned and took Sorin's hand.
02:59Let's go.
03:00We have a wedding to plan.
03:02He knew I feared pain, feared suffering.
03:05He didn't believe I would choose rebirth, and so he went off cheerfully to plan his wedding.
03:09What he didn't know was that the moment I was released from the dungeon,
03:12I had already gone to the Hall of Anguish to register for the cycle of Yggdorik.
03:16Even if I had to endure every torment, even if my next life would know no peace,
03:20I could not bear to remain at his side one moment longer.
03:24By now, every soul in Helheim knew the story.
03:27In Midgard, I had used my power to force Sigrid to marry me.
03:30I had murdered his aging mother.
03:32I had ordered Sorin's limbs severed and left her to be tortured.
03:35He had hated me with everything he had.
03:37In Midgard, he endured it all in silence.
03:40And in the tenth year of our marriage, he slaughtered the entire Rowan clan,
03:43dozens of lives, and then killed me.
03:46After my death, I learned the truth.
03:48He was the arbiter of Helheim, the High Valkyrie.
03:50Because of his hatred for me, he kept me imprisoned at his side for a century
03:54and subjected me to every torment he could devise.
03:56But what he didn't know was that he had hated the wrong woman.
04:00I had never killed his mother.
04:01I had never touched Sorin.
04:06For the first ten years of my imprisonment, I never stopped trying to explain.
04:10It wasn't me.
04:11But Sigrid would grab me by the throat, eyes blazing red, and scream,
04:15I only believe what I saw with my own eyes.
04:17Time wore me down.
04:18I went numb.
04:19I stopped explaining.
04:21Now he told every soul, it was I who had taken him by force and compelled him into marriage.
04:25He had forgotten.
04:26The year we first met, he was huddled among beggars.
04:29And he took the bowl of porridge I extended to him, and he looked up at me.
04:33That young man had gazed at me with something pure and shy in his eyes.
04:36My lady, do you need a guard?
04:39I'll work for a meal.
04:40It was a time of war and chaos.
04:42My heart had gone soft.
04:43I brought him home.
04:44I had people care for his ailing mother and younger brother.
04:47Years passed.
04:48He stood in front of me, unyielding, when danger came.
04:51Then came the day the royal house called for concerts.
04:53He grabbed my hand with reddened eyes and pleaded,
04:55Don't go.
04:57I'll work until I'm worthy of you.
04:59Can't you just consider me?
05:02I had no desire to marry some prince, and he had moved me just a little.
05:05So I said yes.
05:07He said he loved me.
05:08He said he would give himself fully and would not waver for a lifetime.
05:11After we wed, he gave me everything.
05:13He was tireless, devoted, always striving.
05:15Ten years passed.
05:16We were bound without doubt or shadow.
05:18Then came the moment he raised a bow and put an arrow through my chest.
05:21And I finally understood he had never loved me at all.
05:27Now he looked at my wretched figure, with not a single flicker of emotion in his eyes.
05:33In seven days, Sorda and I will be wed.
05:35Right now I need to take her to be fitted for wedding robes.
05:38Crawl back on your own and prepare to begin your penance.
05:40With that, he left with Sorn.
05:42The onlookers needed no invitation.
05:44The sneering words came fast.
05:46She entered Helham and immediately called herself his wife.
05:48I almost believed they were devoted to each other.
05:51Turns out he only kept her around to let his beloved vent her anger.
05:55They laughed.
05:55They sneered.
05:56I did not raise my head.
05:57I used every last fragment of strength to drag myself forward.
06:01Blood trailed in thin streaks across the road.
06:03I ignored the pain consuming my body and crawled, truly crawled, back to the Arbiter's Hall.
06:10When I finally looked up, I did not know how much time had passed.
06:14Sigrid and Sorn returned to find me at the gates, drenched in blood.
06:17Sorn let out a sharp cry and rushed over, pulling me upright.
06:21Rowan, why are you covered in blood like this?
06:23She asked, though she already knew.
06:25The delight behind her eyes was unmistakable.
06:27My stomach turned.
06:28I tried to pull my hand free.
06:30Sorn crumpled straight to the ground.
06:32Sigrid's eyes went wide with fury.
06:33Sorn!
06:34He caught her immediately.
06:36When he saw she had fainted, his expression darkened.
06:38Without pause, he blasted me away.
06:40I was hurled a dozen meters and slammed into a wall.
06:42I couldn't stop the blood that came up with the impact.
06:45The pain in my body doubled.
06:46I clenched my fist against it.
06:48Out of the corner of my eye, I watched Sigrid carry Sorn on his back and leave swiftly,
06:53pausing only to give a cold order.
06:54Throw Rowan into the chasm of Niggdug.
06:56Let her learn her place.
06:58I won't have her forgetting what she is.
07:00He didn't hesitate for a single breath before concluding it was I who had harmed Sorn.
07:04He never once asked, what could I, a hollowed out soul, have even done?
07:08I said nothing.
07:09I did not call after him.
07:10I simply let the death guards drag me away.
07:13Because I already knew Sigrid would never believe me.
07:15The pain was overwhelming.
07:16I couldn't stop my eyes from closing.
07:20I drifted in and out of consciousness as they hauled me off the street.
07:24They were not gentle.
07:25They dragged me through thorns, leaving me torn and raw.
07:28A figure made of blood.
07:29The guards felt nothing.
07:30They simply pitched me over the edge and into the chasm of Nidhugger.
07:33The chasm is the one place every soul dreads most.
07:36The void serpents down there will keep you drowning in your own suffering, alive enough to wish you weren't.
07:41Every soul in this realm can see how much Soren that means to our lord.
07:46You still went and provoked her.
07:49You deserve exactly this.
07:51They believed I deserved it.
07:53They walked away, not knowing I had done nothing.
07:55But I understood.
07:57Even if they knew, they would not help me.
07:59Without Hala present, Helheim answered to Sigrid.
08:01There was nothing more to say.
08:03Nothing that would matter.
08:04The wind screamed past my ears.
08:06Then came the impact.
08:07I hit the floor of the chasm and the force tore more blood from me,
08:10painting my pale-faced crimson.
08:12The void serpents caught the scent and struck without waiting.
08:14Fangs sank into my arm.
08:16As the venom spread, I closed my eyes.
08:20Long buried memories were pulled free and without meaning to, I smiled.
08:23Yet a single tear slipped into my hair.
08:25At the start of the story, my eyes had been full of happiness.
08:28Then a snowstorm passed and my eyes were dyed in blood.
08:31My beautiful husband came with an army and slaughtered my entire clan.
08:34When he looked at me, his eyes held nothing but hatred.
08:37That night, surrounded by the bodies of everyone I had loved,
08:40I screamed until I had nothing left.
08:42But my parents, who had cherished me,
08:44my sister, not one of them would ever answer me again.
08:47Sigrid stood with a bow in his hands,
08:49soaked in the blood of the Rowan clan,
08:51his eyes cold with savage satisfaction.
08:53I watched, numb, as he stepped forward
08:55and drove his blade through my chest without flinching.
08:58Before I fell, I asked him,
09:00Why?
09:00He stepped closer.
09:02With quiet tenderness, he wiped the blood from the corner of my lips,
09:05then smiled, and the smile was winter.
09:08I only ever saw Saul as a younger sister.
09:10Even if she was in love with me,
09:12why did you have to destroy her utterly?
09:14My mother treated you with nothing but kindness.
09:16You didn't spare her either.
09:18Rowan, how can you be this cruel?
09:20Desolation rose from somewhere deep in my chest.
09:23He was my husband, and without a single question,
09:25he had butchered my entire family and laid every crime at my feet.
09:28I had barely crossed paths with Sorin more than a handful of times.
09:31I had loved him with everything I had.
09:33Why would I ever have harmed his family?
09:36But it didn't matter.
09:37Nothing had ever been real between us.
09:38There was no tenderness to speak of.
09:40Not once.
09:41Not ever.
09:44Self-loathing sank into the marrow of me.
09:46I could not stop the anguished sounds that tore from my throat,
09:49nor the tears that fell without ceasing.
09:51The void serpents fed greedily on my suffering,
09:53curling the corners of their mouths in satisfaction.
09:55My family appeared before me, and their accusations came one after another.
10:00Rowan, how can you still love the one who destroyed us?
10:04He killed your family.
10:05Why haven't you made him pay?
10:07Rowan.
10:08If you hadn't let jealousy drive you to hurt Sorin and Sigran's mother,
10:12we would never have died.
10:14The whispers and the contempt circled me without end.
10:17I shook my head violently.
10:19The disappointment in their eyes broke something inside me.
10:21I didn't do it.
10:23My voice came out as a ragged rasp.
10:24My eyes were so swollen I could barely see.
10:27The suffering pouring from me drew more and more void serpents close.
10:30They sank their fangs in again, extracting the anguish, harvesting it.
10:33There was no escape.
10:34I could only relive it, drown in it, again and again,
10:37until I lost consciousness entirely.
10:41When I opened my eyes again, I was no longer in the chasm of Nidhuger.
10:44The familiar surroundings told me at once, this was Sigrid's estate.
10:49Rowan, I'm so sorry.
10:50I never expected Sigrid to misunderstand and throw you into the chasm.
10:54I only fainted yesterday because I can't stand the sight of blood.
10:58Startled myself, really.
10:59I'm terribly embarrassed about it.
11:02Rowan is so kind-hearted.
11:04You'll forgive me, won't you?
11:06After all, I've decided not to hold a grudge about what you did to me in Midwar.
11:11Her eyes were filled with triumph.
11:12She was telling me plainly,
11:13even the smallest incident would be enough to make Sigrid turn his fury on me.
11:17I didn't speak, but Sigrid's face had already hardened.
11:20Sorin came to apologize in good faith, and this is how you respond?
11:23She's chosen not to pursue what you did to her in Midland,
11:26and you can't even offer a single word of apology.
11:29Today, you will apologize to Sorin.
11:32If you don't, I have no problem keeping you in the chasm of Nindo or indefinitely,
11:37suffering every single day.
11:39Rowan, just bend a little.
11:41After this, we can be friends again.
11:43Her contempt was clear as glass.
11:44It pricked at something in me.
11:47I'm sorry.
11:48I had no desire to apologize, but I knew with certainty.
11:51Sigrid would make me pay on Sorin's behalf regardless.
11:54Good.
11:55At least you know when to yield.
11:58I couldn't afford to lose my chance at the cycle of Yggdrasil.
12:01That apology bought me a brief, fragile peace.
12:04A few days later, the moment I was well enough to leave my chamber, I moved to go.
12:08But Sorin stepped into my path.
12:11Going out to enjoy yourself, Rowan?
12:14Then bring me back a lantern.
12:16I'm too occupied with the wedding to bother.
12:20I had no desire to humor her, but even less desire to endure her wheedling.
12:24I agreed.
12:25The moment I stepped out of the estate, I went straight to the Hall of Anguish.
12:29The warden led me inside.
12:31But no sooner had I faced the first trial of love and hatred than I nearly came apart at the
12:35seams,
12:36my soul unraveling.
12:40The warden brought me back out, shaking his head with a sigh.
12:46You cannot yet withstand the torments of love, hate, and obsession.
12:52I'll hold your place.
12:54Come back when you've recovered.
12:57There was nothing to be done.
12:58I could only return to the Arbiter's Hall.
13:00Secret's curse left me no choice.
13:02When Sorin saw me, she immediately took the lantern from my hands with a smile.
13:05I wanted to leave.
13:06Someone grabbed my wrist.
13:10I turned.
13:11You went to the Hall of Anguish?
13:13I lowered my eyes slightly.
13:15I merely passed by.
13:17He looked at my ashen face, pressed the unease back down.
13:20What?
13:22You saw the trials and were frightened into looking like that?
13:25He exhaled with quiet relief, a scornful thought crossing his mind.
13:29I was so small and so cowardly.
13:31Why would I ever enter the cycle of Yggdrasil just to leave him?
13:34I said nothing more.
13:36I turned to go.
13:36Then heard Sorin let out a sharp cry and collapse, vomiting blood.
13:40The lantern had been unwrapped.
13:42The warmth of Midgard still clung to it.
13:45Any soul who had passed into Helheim would be burned by such living light.
13:50Do you hate Sura so much you'd see her soul torn apart?
13:53I pressed my lips together and said nothing.
13:55Since you love the light of the living world so much, let me give you your fill of it.
14:04At noon the following day, I was taken to Midgard.
14:07The blazing sun fell on me like a judgment.
14:09The pain was beyond bearing.
14:11In the shadows, a death guard shuddered.
14:13You can avenge anyone in this realm.
14:16As you would just know, Sorin, my lord is merciless.
14:21For one moment, I felt myself beginning to dissolve.
14:23Then Sigrid reappeared and wrenched me back into Helheim.
14:26I was forced to my knees before Sorin.
14:28Sigrid's voice was flat as still water.
14:30Apologize.
14:31He stood firm.
14:33I said nothing.
14:34Sorin glanced between us and waved Sigrid off.
14:38Let me have a word alone with her.
14:40Of course.
14:43The moment he left, Sorin rose from her sickbed, as though nothing had happened at all, and produced a memory
14:48stone.
14:49Look at these people.
14:51Do you recognize them?
14:53I looked up instinctively.
14:55My parents.
14:56My family.
14:57All of them.
14:58Surrounded by something that looked like the inside of a furnace.
15:02Because of you, Sigrid and I were torn apart.
15:08And your family.
15:09They deserved what they got.
15:12Sigrid kept them around all this time so I could find anger.
15:17They're screaming.
15:18Isn't it lovely?
15:19Don't you want to feel it?
15:21Her smile was radiant.
15:22Her eyes were full of cruelty.
15:23My vision flooded red.
15:24I couldn't stop myself.
15:26My hands closed around her throat.
15:28You deserve to die.
15:32But she laughed, and then her face crumpled into fear.
15:38One word.
15:39Sigrid came at once, pulling her free, and the rage that blazed in his eyes when he turned on me
15:43was absolute.
15:44Since hatred is all you have, I'll send you to the Hall of Anguish and strip it out of you.
15:52I won't have you thinking about hurting Sorin ever again.
15:58In an instant, I was thrown before the gates of the Hall of Anguish.
16:01Sigrid expected me to beg.
16:03I didn't look back.
16:04I walked straight through the doors, into the blazing Hall of Hatred, without hesitating for a single step.
16:09Sigrid watched.
16:10Something lodged in his chest.
16:11But he turned and left anyway.
16:15In the days that followed, Sigrid went through the motions of preparing the wedding, distracted and hollow.
16:20And I, inside the Hall of Anguish, walked through every trial there was.
16:24On the day of their wedding, I finally stepped onto the path of Yggdrasil's cycle.
16:28The old woman held out the mead of oblivion.
16:30I drained it in one swallow, and left no trace of it on my lips.
16:34She watched my retreating back, and shook her head quietly.
16:37All things are written in fate.
16:39Before the wedding ceremony began, Sigrid turned his gaze toward the Hall of Anguish, as if drawn by something he
16:45couldn't name.
16:45Sorin concealed the malice in her eyes, and spoke with a bright smile.
16:48Why don't we bring Rowan back?
16:51I'd like her here to bless us.
16:54He gave her the opening she needed.
16:56Sigrid's face shifted.
16:57I'll go.
16:58I won't be long.
17:00He went to retrieve me, but the warden of the Hall stopped him cold.
17:04Rowan has already endured all four trials as a corrupted soul, and entered the cycle of Yggdrasil.
17:11Sigrid could not believe it.
17:12But when the warden summoned the vision from an hour prior, all the color drained from his face.
17:17Because I had truly stepped into the cycle, and I had not looked back.
17:21Not once.
17:22A sharp pain struck him in the chest.
17:24He stood there, stunned.
17:25Something nameless and bitter rising through him.
17:27Sorin, tired of waiting, came after him.
17:30She took one look at his hallowed expression, and reached out to tug at his sleeve,
17:33barely masking her impatience.
17:36Sigrid, the ceremony is about to begin.
17:38Let's go back.
17:39She had no interest in where Rowan had gone.
17:42All she knew was that if she didn't hold on to what was in front of her right now,
17:45she would never have another chance.
17:46But Sigrid, who had always been so tender with her,
17:49wrenched her arm free without a word, and flew toward the gate of the cycle.
17:52Sigrid!
17:53Sorin screamed after him.
17:54But he didn't turn back.
17:56Her expression darkened.
17:57She almost followed, then stopped herself.
17:59The memories she carried from Midgard were not ones she wanted to revisit.
18:03She bit her lip and sent a spirit messenger to bring him back.
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