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Girl Climber [Full Movie] [Vertical Drama]Full EP - Full
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00:00:06Oh
00:00:30Let's go.
00:01:10Rito, open that up.
00:01:12Come on.
00:01:13Get it open.
00:01:16I totally knew it.
00:01:18I totally knew it.
00:01:21What is it?
00:01:23It's a rope.
00:01:24Get rid of that box.
00:01:26Another 12 year old would love a rope for Christmas.
00:01:29Yeah.
00:01:31Yeah.
00:01:31Come on, Em.
00:01:33Yeah.
00:01:34Woo!
00:01:35Yeah!
00:01:37Yeah!
00:01:38Yeah!
00:01:39Yeah!
00:01:39Yeah!
00:01:45Emily.
00:01:46Emily.
00:01:47Emily, where are we?
00:01:48I don't know.
00:01:50I don't know.
00:01:51We're at El Capitan.
00:01:57From Colorado, Emily Harrington.
00:02:02She's certainly a force to be reckoned with.
00:02:06Emily, make it look easy.
00:02:12Five-time national champion.
00:02:22But Emily is certainly one of the most well-rounded American female climbers.
00:02:27Part of your brain knows that this is slightly illogical.
00:02:32It is dangerous.
00:02:33But life's boring if you don't have that little element of spice, right?
00:02:38We should try to get a little bit more comfortable with being afraid.
00:02:46I love exploring my perceived limit and trying to push past it.
00:03:03The third point of communication is very rarely.
00:03:03It's a great place to be reckoned.
00:03:20Yeah.
00:03:20We should be able to get an effective tool.
00:03:21We should have an example.
00:03:22We should have an example.
00:03:22We should have an example.
00:03:29Are you biting my nose?
00:03:45We got fire.
00:03:47I think this is my pee bottle.
00:03:51Nope, it's just a normal water bottle.
00:03:59A little flare in the van.
00:04:15I'm really proud of my career so far, but if you want to call yourself a successful all-around
00:04:21climber, you've got to be up on El Cap.
00:04:26There it is, in all its glory.
00:04:31El Capitan.
00:04:47It's always surprising how big it is.
00:04:50I never think, oh, it doesn't look that bad, or it doesn't look that big.
00:04:54It's always fucking so big.
00:04:58I don't know why no one talks about how scary it is.
00:05:04I wish I could not feel afraid anymore.
00:05:11El Capitan is a 3,200-foot granite face.
00:05:18It doesn't get much bigger.
00:05:21It doesn't get much more difficult.
00:05:23It doesn't get much more high quality than El Cap.
00:05:28It's just the most impressive, most beautiful stone in the world.
00:05:32And it's so hard to free climb.
00:05:38When you look at El Cap, it looks impossible.
00:05:41It looks smooth, and you can't imagine what there would be to climb it.
00:05:44It always attracted people that are curious to push themselves to the highest level.
00:05:52For decades, climbers have been testing themselves up there.
00:05:58Climbing El Capitan is the most badass thing that you can do as a human.
00:06:04With the exception of Lynn Hill and a few other women, it's very much like a boys' club.
00:06:09Come on! Go fast!
00:06:13When I started climbing, the first person I learned about was Lynn Hill.
00:06:18She was the first to free climb a route on El Capitan called the Nose.
00:06:24And then the following year, she went back and free climbed it in a day.
00:06:29Which was the most groundbreaking, astonishing achievement.
00:06:34I didn't feel like I needed to prove anything after that.
00:06:38Because I was at the age where I wanted to have a kid, I wanted to have a family,
00:06:41and having the freedom to just go rock climbing was not going to happen forever.
00:06:47At a certain point, you have to be happy with what you've done.
00:06:56What's your ring?
00:06:57You want to hear my alarm?
00:06:58Yeah. This is mine. What's yours?
00:07:01Mine's more the other end of the spectrum.
00:07:02I was in Yosemite looking for a project, some sort of inspiration.
00:07:08I was working on my personal quest to free solo El Cap on the free rider.
00:07:12And she was willing to go up the wall to support me for a day of climbing.
00:07:15I got really excited because climbing with Alex on El Cap is like playing basketball with Michael Jordan.
00:07:21It's like you're with the best of the best.
00:07:25First time I met Emily was at a cliff called Jail House.
00:07:28She was already a very established, very successful climber.
00:07:32She was a lot better than me.
00:07:34And the thing that really made an impression was that she was all kind of done up
00:07:37and she had earrings and things, and I was like,
00:07:39man, how can someone climb that hard with earrings?
00:07:42She was just so well put together and going to college
00:07:45and doing the hardest thing at the cliff.
00:07:46You know, everything about it was just different than what I was living.
00:07:49I was like, whoa, that's a different level.
00:07:53You could tell he just didn't really care about anything but climbing.
00:07:56And he is very famous for free soloing, which is rock climbing without a rope.
00:08:04No person does what he does at his level.
00:08:10I was incredibly inspired by the way he moved.
00:08:16He was so perfect.
00:08:19He seems so at ease, and I've always envied that.
00:08:23With the green ground, you can climb up to the spire and reflake the rope and manage.
00:08:28I'm just trying to nurture you into a simulclimbing machine.
00:08:35Good work.
00:08:38Good work.
00:08:39Good work.
00:08:40That was good.
00:08:41There's no way I would have done any of that without you.
00:08:44Isn't that pretty rad?
00:08:45That was pretty rad.
00:08:46That was a life experience.
00:08:47Yeah.
00:08:49I don't think you could do that in a day.
00:08:51You do?
00:08:52Yeah.
00:08:53I don't think it'd be that bad for you because you just have the base fitness that you need,
00:08:56you know?
00:08:56Yeah.
00:08:57It'd definitely be a dream.
00:08:59Yeah, it'd be sick.
00:09:00It's gotta start somewhere.
00:09:01Yeah.
00:09:03I mean, you know.
00:09:05That's when I first thought of trying to free climb LCAP in less than 24 hours.
00:09:12Climbing it in a day is the epitome of hard rock climbing.
00:09:16And there's a desire to prove myself.
00:09:18Like, I do deserve to be here.
00:09:20I do deserve to be climbing with all of these people that I've looked up to and idolized
00:09:25for a long time.
00:09:27That's pretty awesome.
00:09:28That's pretty good.
00:09:29I like a dagger, too.
00:09:31It's the sense of belonging that I want.
00:09:48I see some big wet streaks, but I also see dry rock, so it's kind of a mixed bag up
00:09:55there.
00:09:58It is not going to change a single thing.
00:10:03Most people free climb LCAP over five days or so.
00:10:06It's so much harder to free climb LCAP in a day.
00:10:11The difference between doing a multi-day ascent and doing a one-day ascent is huge.
00:10:16To climb that thing in a day, it's outrageous.
00:10:19It's an audacious undertaking.
00:10:23I'm left wondering whether she can pull it off.
00:10:28Most people who free climb LCAP in a day have done it via the free rider because it's the easiest
00:10:33route.
00:10:34I wanted to do a more challenging route, and that's why I chose Golden Gate.
00:10:41There are very few climbers who have free climbed any route on LCAP in a day other than the free
00:10:46rider.
00:10:47Golden Gate is quite a bit harder.
00:10:50Golden Gate has only been free climbed in a day by three people.
00:10:53Three of the best LCAP climbers in the world.
00:11:00These guys are heroes of mine, and I want to be a part of that group.
00:11:11Golden Gate has 34 pitches.
00:11:14My goal is to climb from the beginning of each pitch to the end without falling.
00:11:19That will be a free ascent.
00:11:21If I fall, I have to go back to the beginning of that pitch and try again.
00:11:26And I need to do this in under 24 hours.
00:11:36That's going to be really hard for her.
00:11:38I give her a 20% chance of sending, honestly.
00:11:42She just hasn't paid her dues like Honnold has.
00:11:52It's hard to put yourself out there and say you're going to try to do the hardest thing you've ever
00:11:57done.
00:11:58Just because I'm trying to protect myself from people finding out that I'm afraid or that I fail or that
00:12:04I'm just like everyone else.
00:12:08I mean, I don't want to say it's mansplaining, but primarily there's men that have accomplished this goal.
00:12:13And so it's like, I get a lot of advice.
00:12:16And it's a lot of like, oh, you need to be committed to this and you need to go here
00:12:20for this amount of time and you need to do it this way.
00:12:22And you should be doing this and you should be doing that.
00:12:24I've been climbing for 22 years.
00:12:27Like I know how to approach a goal.
00:12:31I don't need someone to tell me how to do it.
00:12:35But obviously that's a hard, that's a hard thing to convince yourself of as well.
00:12:40It's hard for me to convince myself that I know what I'm doing.
00:12:44Do you think I need more than one three?
00:12:45I wouldn't even take the three.
00:12:46Oh my God.
00:12:48Maybe I don't need this and two purples.
00:12:51I always had it in my mind ever since he asked me to support him that he would probably be
00:12:56willing to support me on Golden Gate.
00:12:59I'd like to think I may be the best supporter in the world for El Cap just because I know
00:13:04the roots really well.
00:13:04I've worked on them a long time.
00:13:06I don't think anyone has climbed any of those parts of the wall faster.
00:13:09Are you climbing the monster with just one six?
00:13:11Yeah.
00:13:12Awesome.
00:13:12And I wanted to help Emily achieve this big dream with her.
00:13:16Alex is very comfortable, very confident, but I also trust him.
00:13:20Having someone up there who you can tell is right at home makes me feel that much more comfortable.
00:13:27I'll give you that.
00:13:28Go up and try your best.
00:13:30That's all I'm doing.
00:13:30I'm just going to go try.
00:13:31Move by move, you just do your best and see how it plays out.
00:13:34I'm allowed to fall.
00:13:36Yeah.
00:13:36I mean, that's it.
00:13:37That's the beautiful.
00:13:37Then you have a rope.
00:13:38It's very good to show it.
00:13:40I'm really happy that I have a rope.
00:14:11You're going to take your time and enjoy.
00:14:16Remember, climbing mountain is fun.
00:14:35the way that I climb the bottom 2,000 feet of the route with Alex is something called simul
00:14:40climbing so I'm leading placing gear and Alex is following climbing at the same time as me
00:14:45so we're moving up the wall together and it enables you to move a lot faster but it cuts
00:14:53some corners because you're placing less safety equipment between yourself and your partner so if
00:14:59either of us falls we can get severely injured or we could die but this is really the only way
00:15:05to climb it in a day I was kind of proud of myself honestly yeah that was good thank you
00:15:11I just hand
00:15:12every hand of the roof I was like fuck that
00:15:34that was the easiest that the monster has ever felt but it's still really hard that was way faster than
00:15:41ever before oh yeah yeah like 45 minutes
00:15:48you found 2,000 feet already you may as well climb one more picture I'm gonna try
00:15:52I don't know if I can though yeah of course you can just get in there and engage
00:15:59all right you need someone to like punch in the nuts
00:16:02ovaries
00:16:15you're doing great thank you I really appreciate it I'm really digging deep here you know this is uh
00:16:20this is my first effort yeah do you think it's worth giving it one to the death effort
00:16:25I mean I've been trying to give it to the death yeah what is that to the death it seems
00:16:29a little
00:16:29like worky if we decide to go down let's fully debrief like what are you going to do differently
00:16:35what are you going to do better where can you save energy yeah because I mean obviously there's a ton
00:16:40a lot of room for improvement today it just went from perfectly okay to perfectly not okay
00:16:59oh oh my god it hurts so bad
00:17:07hi give me a hug oh you needed a hug from you all day thank you these bruises are just
00:17:12all from one pitch
00:17:14I was secretly happy that we got rained off because everything just felt so hard
00:17:24I don't really foresee me trying again this spring I'm kind of worked over from the season
00:17:31I didn't feel ready and I haven't put in the work in order to be successful
00:17:54oh that was her first wetsuit look at how tiny that little thing is here you go here's a bunch
00:18:02of
00:18:02trophies climbing stuff first place
00:18:10junior nationals oh when she was 12 years old I don't remember what that one was
00:18:19what's that one from serious shovel oh yeah this is the world cup she won
00:18:28oh there's a little mohawk look at that mohawk
00:18:35I would say I had like a very normal childhood my dad was really into any activity that was in
00:18:44the
00:18:44mountains ski
00:18:51I had this idea that girls were inferior in some way desperately wanted to prove that I wasn't like that
00:19:05I grew up with my two cousins who were boys and we were super competitive with each other
00:19:11all I wanted to do was be better than them I wanted to do well in everything and I tried
00:19:19really hard
00:19:24when I found climbing this switch went off it was like instantly that's what I wanted to do
00:19:34the feeling of lightness and strength and invincibility was pretty profound
00:19:46I liked the feeling of success
00:19:52and if I didn't measure up to that I was so upset and disappointed
00:20:05competitions being the best winning to me that was what climbing was
00:20:15I definitely started putting more pressure on myself my self-worth was so tied to my success in
00:20:23climbing and then my success in climbing was tied to my weight the less mass you have the easier it's
00:20:32going to be to stay on the wall it just became this cycle of punishment
00:20:38I remember being completely exhausted all the time she was so thin and I didn't know what to do
00:20:48and I remember her hands were orange because all she was eating was carrots
00:20:53and I wasn't sleeping well and I was dizzy sometimes and then climbing wasn't very fun
00:21:04I feel like I barely laughed
00:21:08I started realizing that this isn't how I want to live my life and is climbing going to be a
00:21:17positive
00:21:17force in my life or is it always going to be this negative thing
00:21:24I guess now is the best time and here is the best place to say this
00:21:28I have an eating disorder I can't admit it to anybody else but at least I can admit it to
00:21:34myself
00:21:35I feel out of control when I indulge in food and my all-or-nothing behavior makes me depressed and
00:21:42unhappy
00:21:43I don't ever give myself a break I want to be perfect all the time
00:21:47I must run fast climb strong and eat as little as possible
00:22:01eventually my body and my brain just couldn't really handle all the stress and the pressures
00:22:07I realized that competing wasn't something that I really wanted to do anymore
00:22:16the pivotal thing that happened was I joined the North Face athlete team and got invited on an
00:22:25expedition to Mount Everest I had no idea what it would do for me in my life
00:22:34she was keen to try out mountain climbing
00:22:38so it's like oh first mountain climbing trip how about Everest
00:22:42a little bit crazy but why not it's the tallest and most precipitous mountain range on our planet
00:22:50if you want to test your mettle that's where you go
00:22:53I remember just saying Emily no I do not want you going to Everest
00:22:59Tim said to her you're not going and she said dad I'm not 16 and that was the end of
00:23:05that
00:23:08Emily at 25 barely coming out of the gym as a gym climber and then being on Everest
00:23:15I mean that's a huge leap to me
00:23:17I was a little like dark in those days so um I might have just totally written her off
00:23:25as a first impression you know just kind of like uh whatever
00:23:36it wasn't until I got there and realized that Conrad was like completely hands-off with Emily and
00:23:41he was like well you step in you know I'm like I don't even know her I don't want to
00:23:45do this I'm
00:23:46not a mentor I was not very helpful I definitely am not an incredibly sympathetic person
00:23:58I'm ready to go up tomorrow I'm a little nervous and scared uh to go through the ice fall
00:24:06that's knowledge happens like five times a day it's really unnerving
00:24:17I want to get through the ice fall and then I'll feel okay
00:24:28Conrad saw something in her and he was right
00:24:35she just didn't give in
00:24:48I came to care immensely for Emily over the time of that trip
00:24:54we talked about my relationship we talked about my climbing we talked about her kids and how much
00:24:58she missed her kids and just life and it gave me a peek into what my life could be like
00:25:04in the future
00:25:28she passed me and she was by herself and I was like Emily why are you by yourself where's the
00:25:32Sherpa that you were climbing with she was like oh god I feel so bad I he was slow so
00:25:37I left him
00:25:38behind was that really bad should I go back and get him
00:25:48she crushed it she crushed it it was so out of her main sport that it just
00:25:55was all the more of a huge achievement as a climber you're the sum total of all your
00:26:02ascents and expeditions and each experience that you have builds into who you are as a climber and
00:26:10Emily got that I was a lot stronger than I thought I would be climbing on Everest has made me
00:26:16appreciate
00:26:17the style of climbing that I do I do want to continue to be in the mountains and to learn
00:26:25from them
00:26:32so
00:26:33good morning
00:26:43good morning
00:26:45here's your coffee
00:26:50they stayed up late last night and get all these emails and like texts with china and nepal and
00:26:54that and i'm like scared to turn on their phone and see what everyone wrote come back to bed no
00:27:03i have an interview in 15 minutes okay i'll make breakfast hi this is adrian
00:27:12doing some final prep for a big trip i'm leaving on early next week
00:27:16you know the average everest expedition is two months long and i'm probably away you know seven
00:27:23to eight months a year still traveling and climbing around the world
00:27:29adrian is a high altitude climber and a mountain guide who spends a lot of time in the himalaya
00:27:35we met at camp two on mount everest
00:27:41i just remember this charismatic guy he was super nice and fun to talk to
00:27:48the sad fact of high altitude climbing is there's just not many women i certainly noticed emily as
00:27:55an anomaly but 21 000 feet is really miserable so you kind of like have a crushing headache at the
00:28:02same time you're trying to be like social and funny and interesting it's not like a great flirting
00:28:07opportunity it was this really powerful connection that we had i'd never felt like that with anyone
00:28:13before and we knew that we wanted to stay connected adrian is gone most of the year guiding in the
00:28:22himalaya and because i have this big project i'm working on we are going to spend the next four months
00:28:28apart i don't really look forward to this time of year as it is because adrian's gonna be gone for
00:28:35a
00:28:35really long time and i have a lot of like i put a lot of pressure on myself for my
00:28:41own projects no
00:28:46i've spent a lot of time with people who have lost their partner in the mountains and every time he
00:28:53leaves i have this part of me that is afraid he won't come back
00:29:02the secret stash okay i'm overwhelmed again i'm gonna go eat some toast i'm really overwhelmed right now
00:29:09goodbye here we go
00:29:12i don't know it kind of sucks
00:29:20cat stuff i have food coffee stuff music music bed
00:29:39and she's off
00:29:45it's always hard this one especially
00:29:58i'm going to moab because i want to prepare for the upcoming yosemite season and moab is a great
00:30:05place to do that
00:30:08last spring i just wasn't ready i hadn't put in the work
00:30:18look at these nails too these are the gel nail don't know magic supposed to last for like three months
00:30:28i did not grow up learning how to crack climb and for climbing in yosemite it's a required skill
00:30:46i wouldn't consider myself a super confident person when i'm standing on the ground
00:30:50it's more when i'm like climbing that my confidence shines through
00:31:04i think i did get better technique it's nice to feel a little more confidence
00:31:09it's i'm excited to go do something
00:31:14so
00:31:20so
00:31:45i've been in yosemite now for a few weeks training
00:31:48on golden gate it's been long days hiking in and practicing the harder pitches
00:31:54it's really the only way to know every pitch for that in a day attempt
00:32:02there's five hard sections of the route for me
00:32:07the first one that comes up is the monster
00:32:10the monster you have to kind of wedge your body into this crack
00:32:14and this pitch is almost 200 feet long
00:32:17the monster off with is harder if your foot can't bridge the crack
00:32:20my foot can can span between one side of the crack and the other side so i can easily wedge
00:32:24one
00:32:24foot and push upward if you have a smaller foot it's harder to make up for progress
00:32:36the next pitch that's really hard for me is called the down climb
00:32:41there's essentially no hold
00:32:43you're kind of standing on a less than vertical smooth surface
00:32:49just pasting your feet on the wall and using the friction in order to stick
00:32:54come on your balance has to be pretty perfect in order to not get spit off
00:33:01oh that was it
00:33:05the next hard pitch is called the move
00:33:08at the end of the pitch there's a really hard boulder problem so a series of really hard moves
00:33:18for me it's the most powerful section of the route it has the hardest single moves
00:33:26the next section is called the golden desert
00:33:30it is a really long crack climb
00:33:34mixed with some funky traversing under a roof
00:33:40and then the very next pitch after that is called the a5 traverse
00:33:45and that's kind of the pitch that guards you from success
00:33:50imagine traversing this steep sloping rail and trying to stand on feet that are the width of dimes
00:33:58the a5 traverse is the spot where most people fail by the time you've climbed almost 3 000 feet to
00:34:03get
00:34:04there your arms are just incredibly tired and it's really hard to hang on them
00:34:10i'm still a little nervous about the a5 traverse
00:34:46it's not really that safe even if you make good decisions
00:34:54is it true that i thought you might die yeah
00:34:59i thought you might die and i was trying so you figured you'd start moving on right away
00:35:02yeah just gonna be a bachelorette and like be just in my little world independent
00:35:10it could happen it could be the other way around yeah i think i think about it less but i
00:35:15think about
00:35:15it sometimes as you start speed climbing more and more cutting corners
00:35:22it's a little bit of a stretch but i'm not gonna die i'm not gonna die rock climbing but you
00:35:28gotta
00:35:28think about it and acknowledge it's a possibility it's true i just think that i've finally like
00:35:35come to a place where i'm okay i'm not okay but more okay working is good
00:35:50okay questions okay get married already when you're getting married are you gonna have babies
00:35:56get married already um do you plan on having kids soon okay um i i do plan on having kids
00:36:06eventually i
00:36:07think i want one kid so i'm not really in like a huge rush i i say we we right
00:36:14i think i've come
00:36:16around kind of settled on one because adrian wanted like seven he wanted three um but i just want one
00:36:23so i'm not in a rush and i have like we both have things we want to do first i've
00:36:28got a couple about
00:36:29asking me about lcap and what happened and if i'm going back basically i i failed and i also had
00:36:36terrible weather but that's like a second part of it um that prevented me from succeeding and
00:36:41yes i'm going back in the fall so we got two liters of water okay i have extra chalk cool
00:37:06are you taking that much extra chalk i'm very concerned about it it weighs nothing
00:37:11i guess it just it seems like a lot of shock for yeah we don't have to bring it no
00:37:16no no no but i
00:37:17actually really want if you think it'll make you feel better it makes me feel better okay extra
00:37:21chalk i'm bringing these it's really hot what are those they're breakable ice packs for my hands and
00:37:28feet seems totally absurd so if we want to climb by three what time should we meet in the meadow
00:37:32well like 2 30. 2 30. that's like pretty early though pretty early
00:37:58okay
00:37:59okay
00:38:06nice job
00:38:08nice
00:38:08nice
00:38:09nice
00:38:09nice
00:38:10nice
00:38:18nice
00:38:24nice
00:38:26nice
00:38:26nice
00:38:27nice
00:38:27nice
00:38:38nice
00:38:39nice
00:38:40nice
00:38:49nice
00:38:51nice
00:39:08If you do it today in this style just like you just did it be pretty sick
00:39:17I can't yet I gotta finish the rest of it
00:39:28yeah we started 11 and a half hours ago so it's a good time actually this is when
00:39:35you rely on your your world cup fitness
00:39:50pretty sure you can just climb one more pitch pretty sure there's like five more pitches
00:40:13I'm falling no no you're okay come on come on no it's too much stay with it
00:40:19it just fucked everything up and it's like really good yeah really good
00:40:41Ellen Ellen come on there you come
00:40:47I don't have it you guys I don't have it
00:40:51I'm just too tired I'm giving it everything I have
00:40:56I just just couldn't do it I couldn't keep climbing I'm like super bummed but it's like
00:41:06everything I could possibly do I failed on the last hard pitch pretty heartbroken
00:41:28I think you have to try things that you're afraid of that you might suck at that you're
00:41:35gonna most likely fail at in order to actually really get to know yourself and know what you're
00:41:43capable of when I was trying to figure out how to make a team to go on this seven week
00:41:54totally
00:41:56unknown jungle bashing crazy alpine Myanmar expedition I wanted Emily to go like I wanted her to go
00:42:07more than anyone like I wouldn't go if Emily didn't go this is like an anti-Everest trip
00:42:18think of Everest from the minute you get off the plane to the summit of Everest every step of the
00:42:23way is
00:42:23going to be mapped out Pakakaburatsi was exactly the opposite
00:42:29wanting her on the team was met with a lot of resistance but I put my foot down and she
00:42:35was stoked to do it
00:42:45it was a month before we even got to be scanned we had to cut our gear by two-thirds
00:42:51ran out of food
00:43:04a lot of the things that I did today I've never done before
00:43:22it's scary the heavy pack peel off that ones a little good job ma'am thank you
00:43:31way more rad way more gnarly than Everest
00:43:38my favorite day on that whole climb was Emily and I were stuck on this ridge for 48 hours
00:43:48winds blowing 60 miles an hour non-stop
00:43:53and at one point Emily looks at me and she's like what do you think you think we're gonna be
00:43:57okay
00:43:58I looked at her and I was like I don't I don't know I hope so and she was like
00:44:04all right cool okay
00:44:10and five minutes later we're laughing and like doing what we can to like stay alive
00:44:18Emily and I have talked a lot about how crazy it was and how strung out we were and how
00:44:24close to just like laying down on the trail and giving up we were and we just didn't
00:44:31she was everything I expected her to be on that trip she was gritty she was funny she helped me
00:44:38when
00:44:38I was low she tackled massive scary things
00:44:52you
00:44:583 30 in the morning november 20 something
00:45:08dragged everyone into helping me climb el cap in a day
00:45:15A massive snowstorm is approaching, like tomorrow, so, last day of the season, basically, dragging
00:45:24everyone up here to support me one more time.
00:45:26One more character building day on the mountain.
00:45:28One more character building day on the mountain.
00:45:31It's like 4 a.m.
00:45:33It's way colder than it was last time, so that's good.
00:45:36If you were really pro, you'd be racked onto the harness already and pack your harness
00:45:40that way.
00:45:41Oh yeah, I didn't do that.
00:45:42I got him.
00:45:43You guys needed it last time.
00:45:4510 more feet today, okay?
00:45:47Yeah, exactly.
00:45:4810 more feet today.
00:45:53Go, M, go.
00:45:54Here we go.
00:45:55You're gonna crush it.
00:45:56Thanks, Sonny.
00:46:04Nice, M.
00:46:07You're crushing.
00:46:09It's such a still day, I think.
00:46:11I'm really happy I did.
00:46:28Captain
00:46:30Creaky old grandpa, I'll sit down and tighten the shoes up
00:46:36Nice
00:46:45Are you okay, Em?
00:46:46Emily, are you okay?
00:46:49Em?
00:46:50Holy shit
00:46:52Oh my god Em
00:46:56Should I lower you to the ledge?
00:46:57Emily, you're okay
00:47:02Lower
00:47:05Em, talk to us
00:47:07Talk to us Em
00:47:08Are you okay? Are you right side up?
00:47:11No
00:47:12No
00:47:13She's not right today
00:47:15Fuck
00:47:18Correct
00:47:19I'm gonna be on hold while I try to get a razor, okay?
00:47:22Okay, thank you
00:47:30Hang in there Em
00:47:35You know I can tell that it's terrible
00:47:37It's all terrible
00:47:38Like you can tell it's a giant fall
00:47:41The only thing I was thinking about was whether or not she'll walk again
00:47:45You know I can go to the hospital
00:47:45No
00:47:46No
00:47:49No
00:48:02No
00:48:03No
00:48:03No
00:48:12I'm gonna get
00:48:21I've climbed this pitch so many times, I know it's slippery, but I've never fallen.
00:48:25I know my feet are cold, but I need to be confident.
00:48:30I wasn't scared, I just...
00:48:35Now it's scary though, to think about.
00:48:49Oh, I'm sorry guys.
00:49:00Yeah, still have some stuff to learn I guess.
00:49:33World-class climber Emily Harrington trying to make history, falling from Yosemite's El Capitan, rescued by one of the most
00:49:40famous climbers in the world.
00:49:41Falls are apparel of the sport, no matter your skill level. Thank goodness she was with people like Alex Hunnell.
00:49:48The climber at the center of that Oscar-winning documentary Free Solo.
00:49:51I was blank, so I'm holding the rope, but then when she fell, so much rope fell into the system,
00:49:55like so much rope pooled at my feet basically, that I wound up actually grabbing the rope with my hands
00:50:01in an effort to catch her sooner.
00:50:02I don't know if you guys had a chance to watch Free Solo.
00:50:05Oh, he was...
00:50:06I mean, it's amazing what they do, and boy, you're gonna have some nerves of steel.
00:50:10Yes you do.
00:50:11You sure do.
00:50:11Hope you have a full recovery.
00:50:15How are you feeling about it all?
00:50:18Shitty.
00:50:19Shitty?
00:50:19Shitty about it.
00:50:20Like sad?
00:50:21Yeah.
00:50:24Everyone is interested in LCAP, and everyone is interested in the fact that I was climbing with Alex Hunnell, so
00:50:30they want to write a story about the damsel in distress who was rescued by the Free Solo star.
00:50:37Oh, adrenaline junkies, like, risking their lives and falling off of sheer cliffs and gets rescued. Like, it's just stupid
00:50:45and not true and misunderstood.
00:50:48I had a bad fall climbing because rock climbing is inherently dangerous, but...
00:50:53And Alex did exactly what any good partner would do.
00:50:57Yeah, and that's the end of the story.
00:50:59That goes to me, I don't...
00:51:02We were choosing to take a certain level of risk that day.
00:51:07It was 100% not his fault what happened.
00:51:43I was afraid of not being good enough, and now the entire world thinks that as well.
00:51:56She is no Alex Honnold. Do this without the security of a rope, and then you can pretend to have
00:52:02accomplished something.
00:52:05Woman, go back to kitchen, please. Let man's doing this stuff.
00:52:11She's too fat.
00:52:27I'm bruised and have a rope burn on my neck and a pretty intense concussion.
00:52:33I'm slowly recovering, but mentally I'm struggling.
00:52:41I just spiral into the negativity of, oh, I'm never going to be able to get anywhere with this.
00:52:50Lots of doubt and lots of, kind of, like, questioning of, like, why am I doing this?
00:52:54Why am I even, like, trying so hard?
00:52:57And just feel like giving up.
00:53:00There's just this really big fear and it's all circling around, like, the whole kid thing and the...
00:53:05the clock is ticking idea, and...
00:53:08I really do want to have fun and enjoy climbing. I do. I just don't know how right now.
00:53:15Yeah.
00:53:16It's hard to trust myself, I guess.
00:53:34It's Passover. Happy Passover, guys.
00:53:37Hogsamehack, John.
00:53:38Hogsamehack to you.
00:53:39And, uh, we can tell that it's Passover because we are in our houses, hiding from a plague, and because
00:53:45in a recent...
00:53:46Breakfast. Podcast. Very loud podcast.
00:53:48That smearing blood on your door will stop coronavirus.
00:53:54We are one day short of a month since we've been home.
00:53:58April 12th, Easter Sunday, and...
00:54:04It's Sunday, but it doesn't really matter that it's Sunday.
00:54:08Every day is pretty much very similar.
00:54:15Adrian and I have been physically together for longer than we have ever been.
00:54:21It's felt like this period of deep connection.
00:54:26What's your favorite color?
00:54:28This is like a rapid-fire question.
00:54:31Oh, really? I actually...
00:54:32What's your favorite color?
00:54:35Gray.
00:54:36Gray?
00:54:38That's a terrible favorite color.
00:54:40Come on!
00:54:41My favorite color is green.
00:54:44Really?
00:54:44Yeah.
00:54:45I never knew that.
00:54:46Well, you learn something new every day, don't you?
00:54:48I don't think I've ever bought you anything green.
00:54:50Better start now.
00:54:55We've discussed starting a family in more serious ways.
00:54:59But I really have to finish this project before I can start thinking about taking that step.
00:55:06I don't want to take eight years to free-climb Millocap in a day.
00:55:09Then I'll be 40 and then, you know, it might be too late.
00:55:25If I let something like fear, something like an accident stop me from doing something,
00:55:32then I'll never go back.
00:55:34I'll never try something hard again.
00:55:36This is no longer just a way to prove myself.
00:55:40It's a way for me to gain back trust and confidence in myself.
00:55:48I need to go back.
00:55:58I've been really gentle with myself.
00:56:01Just accepting that I'm probably going to be a little more conservative this year.
00:56:05I think I need to talk to Alex about adjusting my method and just be like,
00:56:08dude, I don't want to like go so fast.
00:56:12I want to be able to stop and take a breather.
00:56:14And I want to be able to place more gear and feel way more safe.
00:56:34And so it begins, Emily's Yosemite season.
00:56:453am.
00:56:46I'm out of bed.
00:56:47I'm in coffee.
00:56:50I'm in coffee.
00:56:50M's waiting for a coffee.
00:56:52The life of a superstar.
00:56:56How's it feeling?
00:56:58It's okay.
00:56:59Where I fell last year.
00:57:00Where you fell last year.
00:57:02Yeah.
00:57:05I'm back in Yosemite for the first time since the accident.
00:57:08And Adrian's been helping me train on the hard pitches and build back that trust.
00:57:14down to the move pitch.
00:57:18Yes.
00:57:19Dun, dun, dun.
00:57:21Oh.
00:57:24Yes.
00:57:25There was no like massive screaming whippers out of the move today.
00:57:30You just hit it every time.
00:57:32You're stronger.
00:57:33Big support today.
00:57:40Physically, I feel better than I have probably ever in my life.
00:57:45I'm trying to figure out the best tactics for climbing the monster.
00:57:50And so I'm going to try putting on my climbing shoe.
00:57:53And then I'm going to try putting on a size 42 TC Pro over top of it to make my
00:58:00foot bigger.
00:58:08I'm so excited about this.
00:58:15And so what time are we thinking about starting?
00:58:17Let's say starting the monster at 6am, which means starting climbing at 1am.
00:58:23That's what I was hoping to do tonight.
00:58:24You know?
00:58:25I know.
00:58:25Get some.
00:58:26Signed up for it.
00:58:27Yeah, no, no.
00:58:28I'm into it.
00:58:29Yeah, knee pads and duct tape and elbow pads.
00:58:31At this point, you're going to get to the top more fresh than when you left the ground.
00:58:35I think it'd be tough to make this more comfortable.
00:58:37Yeah.
00:58:38That's the whole point.
00:58:39Yeah, exactly.
00:58:40We're ready for the long haul right now.
00:58:43I'm planning to have two partners.
00:58:45It is really valuable to have Alex as a partner because he is so fast.
00:58:50But up higher when the climbing gets slower, I really like having Adrian there.
00:58:55He's really good emotional support for me.
00:59:05Go get her.
00:59:07Go get her.
00:59:08Go get her.
00:59:08Move slowly and then, like, see how I feel when I get to that.
00:59:11Yeah, cool.
00:59:12It's the same time tomorrow as today, basically.
00:59:14I do feel ready.
00:59:15I don't think I'm going to be any more ready than I am right now.
00:59:19If I achieve this, I'll never not be a climber, but I can, like, move on from being, like, solely
00:59:26focused on climbing.
00:59:27Like, I can move forward with my life.
00:59:29I can have a family.
00:59:30Like, I could do all these things I've wanted to do that might not require so much, like, pinpointed focus.
00:59:38It's that meaningful.
00:59:39I've been talking the time to get this one.
00:59:58I'm not a child.
00:59:58Nice.
01:00:02I'm a child.
01:00:03I've got a child.
01:00:05It's up there.
01:00:08Nice, Em.
01:00:17At some point in here, I'm gonna have to tie my shoes
01:00:19and put them on, but I'm sort of like,
01:00:20oh, I've got flashbacks of the last year.
01:00:23PTSD.
01:00:23Yeah, exactly.
01:00:25Oh my God, jeez.
01:00:41I'm gonna run around to the top
01:00:43and hopefully get to meet them like two-thirds of the way up.
01:00:49Nice, Em, really smooth.
01:00:53There's Em.
01:00:54She's done for pretty fast.
01:00:57Yes.
01:00:58Great job, Deidre.
01:01:00How do you feel?
01:01:00Okay.
01:01:01Yes.
01:01:04Great job, Deidre.
01:01:27It's so funny that you're wearing two pairs of shoes.
01:01:30It's so funny that you're wearing two pairs of shoes.
01:02:01Let's go.
01:02:02It's scary.
01:02:04Oh, so glad to have that pitch over with.
01:02:08I'm taking off all of my shoes,
01:02:09all four pairs of them that I was wearing.
01:02:15I was wearing Alex's shoes over my shoes
01:02:18so I could climb the monster easier and faster,
01:02:20and it works.
01:02:25I'll say it's not often that I encounter
01:02:27a completely new rock climbing technique on a big wall.
01:02:30This is one of those times you've styled the hard stuff.
01:02:34Next, Em is gonna lead us to the summit
01:02:36of the mighty El Capitan.
01:02:38Let's see what's happening next.
01:02:51Good, Em, really nice.
01:03:01Nice and relaxed.
01:03:04Nice and relaxed.
01:03:10Trust the feet.
01:03:12Perfect, that's the one.
01:03:15Perfect.
01:03:17Really good.
01:03:30Nice work.
01:03:31I'm not coming down off the mountain
01:03:33until I set this route.
01:03:36I'm never climbing that pitch again.
01:03:42Nice, Em, really smooth.
01:03:50I gotta say you look really fit right now.
01:03:52I'm really good.
01:03:53Like, your arms are, like, muscular.
01:03:58Thanks, Alex.
01:04:00Like, have you been, like, working out more?
01:04:03Yeah.
01:04:05I've been putting some effort in.
01:04:08Like, have you really?
01:04:08Because you look like freaking kind of jacks.
01:04:11Yeah.
01:04:12Yeah, dude.
01:04:12I have.
01:04:16Nice.
01:04:18Come on.
01:04:19Come on.
01:04:19Really good.
01:04:19Come on.
01:04:20So strong.
01:04:22Come on.
01:04:23Come on.
01:04:31Nice, Em.
01:04:37That's it.
01:04:38Come on.
01:04:39Really good.
01:04:43There you go.
01:04:44There you go.
01:04:45There you go.
01:04:45What the hell is it?
01:04:46Come on.
01:04:46Come on.
01:04:46There you go.
01:04:53I had to dig really deep for that one.
01:04:57I set the move pitch on my first try.
01:05:00Everything's going well.
01:05:03Waiting for the other shoe to drop.
01:05:16Okay.
01:05:18Okay.
01:05:22Whew.
01:05:23It's better.
01:05:27So exciting.
01:05:28Up here.
01:05:29It's so fresh.
01:05:31It's got dirt all over your face.
01:05:32But, otherwise, looking good.
01:05:34Thanks, Alex.
01:05:35Yeah.
01:05:36I feel good.
01:05:37Dude, infinitely better than last time.
01:06:06You got it, man.
01:06:15No!
01:06:16No!
01:06:17No!
01:06:19Oh!
01:06:20Oh, no.
01:06:24It's bleeding.
01:06:25Yeah, I see.
01:06:26Just a little.
01:06:28Want me to bring you down?
01:06:29Yeah.
01:06:30Good.
01:06:31A little.
01:06:32You're okay.
01:06:32All right.
01:06:38Fuck.
01:06:42See how bad it is.
01:06:51Like, I just don't know anymore about this whole hole.
01:06:55It just feels too hard for me.
01:07:00This stupid shit just keeps happening.
01:07:03Yeah.
01:07:04You're getting better and better every time.
01:07:06I know.
01:07:07I know.
01:07:14I just don't feel good enough right now.
01:07:18I wanted it so badly.
01:07:21Maybe I just wanted it too much.
01:07:30I know.
01:07:31This worked really hard.
01:07:32I know.
01:07:33You're not done, Em.
01:07:36You're not done.
01:07:40Stupid.
01:07:41Why did that have to happen?
01:07:43I didn't do anything wrong.
01:07:45I wasn't running it out.
01:07:46I wasn't doing anything wrong.
01:07:49I'm just scared now.
01:07:51You just bumped your head.
01:07:53You're fine.
01:07:55You didn't break anything.
01:07:57I know.
01:08:00I know.
01:08:01I'll do it.
01:08:02You're gonna do it today.
01:08:10It's not hopeless.
01:08:12I promise.
01:08:13Okay.
01:08:14I'm trying.
01:08:15I keep trying.
01:08:16I don't have that much confidence anymore.
01:08:20I think you've got more try on you.
01:08:23You know I'd tell you if I didn't.
01:08:25I don't.
01:08:26I don't.
01:08:26I think you can do it.
01:08:28You can try.
01:08:29I don't know.
01:08:30I can't do it.
01:08:33I don't know.
01:08:53I don't know if you can.
01:09:23Super good.
01:09:26Do what you're going to do, come on.
01:09:29Come on.
01:09:30Come on.
01:09:31Get on that part.
01:09:56Come on.
01:10:36Thanks.
01:10:38No matter what happens, I'm proud of myself.
01:10:42I'm really proud of myself.
01:10:44Look at the sunset.
01:10:49Oh.
01:10:54Gotta keep climbing.
01:10:57Trying to rest before the last heart pitch.
01:11:00The A5.
01:11:02The sight of...
01:11:05Last time's failure, last year's failure.
01:11:08Yeah.
01:11:09Pretty nervous for it.
01:11:12And we're out of water.
01:11:14Yeah, we are out of water.
01:11:15That sucks.
01:11:15Poor mountain guide planning.
01:11:22You look great.
01:11:23So proud of you.
01:11:24Have fun on this.
01:11:26This is the pitch you earn.
01:11:36Come on.
01:11:41Come on.
01:11:44Come on.
01:11:47Nice.
01:11:51Come on.
01:12:02Come on.
01:12:03Come on.
01:12:10There we are.
01:12:12Come on.
01:12:16Come on.
01:12:18Come on.
01:12:22Come on.
01:12:23Come on.
01:12:25Come on.
01:12:27You know what to do.
01:12:46Come on.
01:12:52Come on.
01:12:59Come on.
01:13:00Come on.
01:13:04Come on.
01:13:09Holy shit.
01:13:11Evelyn!
01:13:13Woo!
01:13:13Woo!
01:13:15Ow!
01:13:19Oh my God!
01:13:22Holy shit!
01:13:25Holy shit!
01:13:34I can't believe I did that okay I gotta keep it together we got five more pitches
01:13:47I've always dreamed of being able to do this and now it's happening and it's just crazy how it's
01:13:53happening it was so close so many times of falling just now so close but I just didn't fucking let
01:14:00go
01:14:40fuck you
01:15:01I'm really really happy and exhausted my head kind of hurts and I'm thirsty and everything
01:15:10is perfect
01:15:16I love you so much
01:15:19fuck yeah you did it
01:15:27I'm so proud of you you worked so hard
01:15:33and you believed
01:15:35yeah
01:15:372112
01:15:392113
01:16:092115
01:16:30I can say hi to everyone.
01:16:31Nice work.
01:16:32Thanks.
01:16:33Well done.
01:16:35You look worse.
01:16:37Actually, you look pretty good.
01:16:38Things went downhill a little bit after you left.
01:16:41You have to make an effort, dude.
01:16:43Why'd you leave us?
01:16:46That is so sweet.
01:16:50Dude.
01:16:53Oh my gosh.
01:16:55That is so funny.
01:17:43I can still hear her voice in my head, and I think about whenever something's hard or something comes up
01:17:55that feels tricky or feels complicated, especially as like a woman and a mother, I try to think about how
01:18:06Hillary would handle it.
01:18:19Climbing is dangerous, and it entails a level of risk, but climbing has given me so much, and I'm just
01:18:26not willing to give it up.
01:18:33I'm excited for what's next.
01:18:35Bye-bye.
01:18:57I know the rise and I know the fall.
01:19:01Cause a voice inside knows me best of all.
01:19:09If I can't run, I'll walk or crawl.
01:19:14I'll restart, restart.
01:19:19I'll give my all to find my place, my place on the wall.
01:19:44I'll follow the path into the sky, to kiss the heavens before I die.
01:19:58Amidst the clouds, the world seems small.
01:20:04His tired heart still wants it all.
01:20:10I'll find my place, my place on the wall.
01:20:18I'll find my place, my place on the wall.
01:20:26I cannot, I'll give a go.
01:20:28I'll spend in the floor,isés.
01:20:30I'll give it my all.
01:20:32I'll give it myullah.
01:20:34Mine.
01:20:39I'll give my earth, given my heart.
01:20:44Give it my hope.
01:20:46I'll give it my love.
01:20:46I'll give it my heart, give it my heart for my place on the wall.
01:20:52I found my place, my place on the wall
01:21:00I found my place, my place on the wall
01:21:46I found my place on the wall
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