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Taskmaster - S15E07 - Schrödinger's Egg [Full Movie] [Ranked]Full EP - Full
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00:02Brace! Brace!
00:03I'm bracing!
00:12No, no, no, no, no!
00:18No!
00:23Ah!
00:25What?
00:31APPLAUSE
00:36Hello, everybody, and welcome to Taskmaster.
00:40The road to Taskmaster victory is long.
00:42There are many hurdles, physically and psychologically.
00:44Different individuals respond in different ways,
00:47and sometimes on camera there are those that seem not to care
00:50at all how well they do.
00:51But do not be fooled.
00:53One of them came to my dressing room last night,
00:55hot tears streaming down their face.
00:57I want this more than I've ever wanted anything before.
01:01I want to make my family proud.
01:03Please, Greg.
01:04Please don't take this from me, please.
01:06Now, I would never reveal that person's identity,
01:09but I'll say this.
01:10Chin up!
01:11You're doing fine.
01:12And don't be silly.
01:13Of course you'll be able to show your face in Scotland again.
01:15LAUGHTER
01:19Let's meet them all now.
01:21Please give it an enormous round of applause to Frankie Bale!
01:24CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
01:25I know Graham.
01:27Jenny O'Klaan.
01:29Bael Smith-Baino.
01:31And Mae Martin.
01:34And next to me, a man who smells his own farts
01:37using what he describes as his guff and cup system.
01:40LAUGHTER
01:42It's...
01:42Eddie Clarence Hall!
01:48Hello.
01:49Hello.
01:50Hello.
01:51Hello.
01:51Good evening.
01:52How are you?
01:52I am great.
01:55Wow.
01:55For once.
01:56And I want to take an opportunity, if you wouldn't mind,
01:59an opportunity to thank this man,
02:01because, er, you get a lot of stick from people
02:04for being mean to me.
02:06I thought you were very nice.
02:07Four months ago, Greg gave me a watch.
02:09He said,
02:09I want to give you this,
02:10and he gave me that,
02:11and I...
02:12It's really nice.
02:14So...
02:14I mean, I don't know how to do it.
02:16APPLAUSE
02:16This is just true.
02:17Nice guy.
02:18I haven't got you anything,
02:18but you may do what you may...
02:21with me.
02:23LAUGHTER
02:24Pay back for my lovely present.
02:26LAUGHTER
02:28Put your tongue out.
02:30LAUGHTER
02:31What do I do?
02:33LAUGHTER
02:33OK.
02:42APPLAUSE
02:50APPLAUSE
02:52Come on then.
02:53Yesterday I gave prized half-time,
02:54and this week the category is
02:55The most brilliant thing that pops up.
02:58You'll give five points to the top of the Pops,
03:01and then one of them will be really happy at the end of the show
03:02when they win five brilliant things that pop up.
03:05Back to you, Pops.
03:06Right, obviously, anyone who's brought a toaster in,
03:09get ready for no points.
03:11LAUGHTER
03:12Ivo, hello.
03:13Hello, Greg.
03:14What's the most brilliant thing that you've brought in that pops up?
03:17It's, of course, the game of whack-a-mole
03:19with a bespoke Taskmaster twist.
03:21Here it is.
03:23He's done this.
03:24There we are!
03:26LAUGHTER
03:28Oh, God.
03:28Oh, God, I like it more than I ever imagined I would.
03:33Yes.
03:34Not too proud not to put myself in the whack-a-mole.
03:37I suffer as we all shall at the hands of the bat.
03:41LAUGHTER
03:42Well, it's nice.
03:44You made the effort to make it Taskmaster-centric, and I enjoy that.
03:47It feels mid-range at this stage.
03:50The Japanese format of whack-a-mole,
03:52magura tataki, mole smash, is popular worldwide.
03:56And now it's got our faces on it.
03:58LAUGHTER
03:59Five points, please.
04:01LAUGHTER
04:03APPLAUSE
04:06Do you want me to enter five points?
04:08I do not.
04:09LAUGHTER
04:10Hello, May.
04:11You remember what you said about toasters?
04:13LAUGHTER
04:14But, bear with me.
04:16OK, I've brought a Pop-Tart, but no, wait.
04:21Yeah, this is May's most brilliant thing that pops up.
04:23On the Pop-Tart is the most brilliant mind of our time.
04:28LAUGHTER
04:30My man, Professor Brian Cox.
04:34Look at his hair and...
04:36OK, whack-a-mole's looking more attractive.
04:39LAUGHTER
04:39Are you a fan of Professor Brian Cox?
04:41Oh, I think he's fit, yeah.
04:44No, I respect his mind.
04:46LAUGHTER
04:47Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
04:47All you're going to see is my burning face.
04:52LAUGHTER
04:54How have you never had an impression show?
04:56LAUGHTER
04:58Jenny.
04:59Oh, no.
05:00You must be feeling a little bit encouraged by Professor Brian Pop-Tart.
05:05No.
05:05Do you like David Bowie?
05:06Do I?
05:07Yeah.
05:07I don't mind him.
05:09Right, David Bowie would never have had those big balloon trousers
05:12had it not been for this bloke called Oscar Schlemmer, right?
05:18And he designed the Bauhaus Ballet,
05:22so I have bought for you a Bauhaus Ballet pop-up book.
05:27Here is the book.
05:28Yeah.
05:29Here it comes.
05:30Bop!
05:31Ooh!
05:32Ooh!
05:33Did you hear that noise?
05:34The audience loved it.
05:35Craig.
05:36Come on.
05:37I don't mind it.
05:38It's interesting because the lineage from Oscar Schlemmer
05:41to Bowie is all in the Bauhaus movement.
05:45Yeah, yeah.
05:45That's why these people came here, Jenny.
05:47LAUGHTER
05:48They're gagging for Schlemmer!
05:50That's all they want!
05:51Schlemmer versus cop!
05:52Schlemmer versus cop!
05:53These people!
05:54Yeah.
05:55Kyle.
05:55The most brilliant thing that pops up is obviously oneself.
06:00And what better thing to pop up on than a pogo stick?
06:03Oh.
06:04Ooh!
06:05We found our level.
06:07LAUGHTER
06:08Yes.
06:09And it was popped in this pogo stick.
06:13LAUGHTER
06:15I had a bit of fun.
06:16APPLAUSE
06:19My parents genuinely got me a pogo stick for Christmas.
06:22I'm 35 years old.
06:23I was like, oh, what should I do with it?
06:25And they were like, bounce around with your friends.
06:29They were like...
06:32You might avoid being bottomed because I used to have a pogo stick
06:34and I quite liked it and that's the only reason.
06:36I really like the image of you on a pogo stick.
06:38LAUGHTER
06:39That was quite good.
06:41Got into a nasty accident with Mark.
06:43Landed on his foot.
06:44Poor lad.
06:45Was he one of your students?
06:47LAUGHTER
06:49APPLAUSE
06:51Hi, Frankie.
06:52You must be feeling pretty confident here.
06:54I...
06:55I've brought something that pops up regularly in my house.
06:58I've tried to throw it out of my house, I think on three occasions,
07:02and it always returns.
07:03I've ended up just hanging it on the wall in my living room.
07:06And it is this very sinister painting.
07:09Here it is.
07:11LAUGHTER
07:13LAUGHTER
07:14It is awful.
07:15But I sort of love it.
07:16Who's putting it up?
07:18The children deny.
07:20LAUGHTER
07:20But they're not trustworthy.
07:22What is the least brilliant thing that pops up, Greg?
07:25Well, what do you think?
07:26I feel like it might be the Pop-Tart.
07:27Yeah, it is.
07:28Oh.
07:29It's just annoyed me. It's out.
07:30One point.
07:31One point to May.
07:31Pogo stick, two points.
07:33Oh!
07:33Book, lazy, three points.
07:36Unbelievably, a whack-a-mole that he...
07:38Got some faces out.
07:40I don't know why it's got four points, May.
07:41You're right.
07:42It's inconsistent.
07:43That's fine.
07:44Fordriver.
07:45And that painting doesn't deserve any praise,
07:47but, weirdly, it's getting five points.
07:49One, two, three, four, five points.
07:51So, thank you.
07:52APPLAUSE
07:56Well, more like, let's get pulping.
07:59MUSIC
08:12Hello, Alex.
08:13Hi, Jenny.
08:13Please stand on the little circle.
08:15OK.
08:16What do you think this is?
08:18Prime pan.
08:19A Victorian satellite.
08:21I think this is, like, a World War II bomb.
08:24Be careful.
08:24I'll put the safety gloves on.
08:26Of course, if it's a bomb.
08:27Yeah.
08:27Yeah, yeah.
08:28OK.
08:29Rotate the pulper wheel without pulping the egg.
08:32You must not move from this spot at any point.
08:35If you pulp the egg, you are disqualified.
08:37Most rotations wins.
08:39You have a maximum of ten minutes.
08:42Pulp a wheel, obviously.
08:45Then what's a pulper?
08:46I see no egg.
08:47This is a pulper.
08:49Right.
08:50And the egg's in it.
08:51Where?
08:52Wait, hang on.
08:53What's a pulper?
08:54Obviously, it's very tempting to go, ha-ha.
08:57He's lived his whole life in cotton wool.
08:58He's never used a pulper wheel.
09:00But even much more practical contestants than me,
09:05this is their first time doing this, I think.
09:09Can I say I don't know what a pulper is?
09:11Have you said your time starts now yet?
09:13No.
09:14I wouldn't dream of it.
09:16You're going to have to say your time starts now.
09:19Your time starts now.
09:21APPLAUSE
09:25Over this series, we're building up a very clear picture
09:27of what you were like as a child.
09:30Yes!
09:32I've met that boy so many times.
09:34No, no, no.
09:36Let's start?
09:36Yes, let's start.
09:37We purchased the pulper and this is what's going to happen.
09:39First up, we're going to see Kael and Frankie
09:42starring in a little film I've called Pulp Friction.
09:45The egg, you said, is what, inside?
09:48In the mouth of the pulper?
09:49Where's that?
09:50I can't tell you any more.
09:52But I want to see it.
09:53You can't see it.
09:54How do I know it's there?
09:55You have to take my word for it.
09:57Try that before.
09:58So it's just a kind of blind Schrodinger's egg.
10:02Exactly.
10:03This?
10:04The pulper machine...
10:05Yes.
10:06...presses the cherries across an iron faceplate.
10:08It might be a different one.
10:09The pulper drives the impeller to rotate through the motor
10:12and the slurry in the tank is sucked out.
10:15What?
10:16Oh, I hear the egg.
10:23It's a quarter of ten.
10:25Do you reckon that was the egg?
10:27Does it sound like an egg?
10:28Mm.
10:29Or a calculator.
10:47I mean, it can't be pulped if it's making that much noise.
10:51I mean, that's another way of looking at it.
11:04I don't think that was the egg.
11:06No, that's half a rotation.
11:08I wonder if it goes faster.
11:10It's less likely to break.
11:18Yeah, I think the lack of speed is a problem.
11:22Oh, yeah.
11:34I know what that was.
11:36Plastic chair.
11:37Plastic chair.
11:38OK.
11:38All right.
11:39All right.
11:44All right.
11:45We're on eight and a half rotations.
11:48Stopping there?
11:48Yeah.
11:49I think that's pretty good.
11:52Nothing there.
11:55Two.
12:00It's gone.
12:01You stopping there?
12:02Yeah, it's gone.
12:03Two and three quarters rotations.
12:05APPLAUSE
12:08This is the first time they've seen the interior of the pulper.
12:11Yeah.
12:11So they were blind, obviously, and the more you spun it, the higher the egg got towards danger.
12:17That's how it worked.
12:18Oh.
12:19Eight and a half turns, then, is quite an impressive bit of pre-pulp spinning.
12:24Brinkmanship.
12:25The egg survived for both of them.
12:26We've got a score of eight and a half versus two and three quarters, but they're both still
12:30in play.
12:30I put it to you, Kael, that throughout the task, and indeed when you left, you didn't
12:34know what was going on.
12:36LAUGHTER
12:37I still don't know what a pulper is.
12:39LAUGHTER
12:39We want to show more?
12:40Yeah.
12:41OK, next up to the pulper are Jenny and May.
12:46Right, so the egg is in the machine.
12:48Oh, yeah.
12:49I'm going to go very gently.
12:58That's the egg.
13:00I haven't even done a single rotation yet, have I?
13:03No.
13:04Oh, fuck it!
13:06Pulp the egg!
13:07It's more under pulpit!
13:08Pulp the stupid egg!
13:10Yeah!
13:11Get the egg pulped!
13:12I'm not going to win anyway!
13:15There's no way that egg is not pulped.
13:18That's one rotation.
13:23You've still got nine minutes.
13:26What?
13:27I can't keep this up for another nine.
13:30In the olden days, is this what the pulpers did?
13:32Pulpers would come home to their wives.
13:34The wives would be like, did you pulp the egg?
13:37And they would be like, I did eight rotations.
13:43Yes, I want ten.
13:44You want ten?
13:45OK, ten rotations.
13:50It's smashed, isn't it?
13:52The egg smashed.
13:52It's 11.
13:54I think an egg could survive this.
14:04It's not the egg.
14:0613.
14:07OK.
14:09Yeah?
14:09Yeah.
14:10Thanks, Jenny.
14:12How long?
14:13You've got just 30 seconds.
14:17I would just poke myself if I hadn't halved it and I stopped turning.
14:36I'm intrigued by the characters that you created during that.
14:39That's Mr and Mrs Eggpulper.
14:40Yeah.
14:41Yeah, yeah, yeah.
14:42Where are they from, that couple?
14:43Wherever Nancy from Oliver Twist is from.
14:46They're all, yeah.
14:47How?
14:48Like that.
14:49I mean, I really enjoyed that.
14:51They did very well but also very badly, which means Kyle is still in second place.
14:55And sometimes it doesn't matter if you don't understand the task.
14:59Right, part one is about to have it on its toes.
15:02Open the back doors of the van and we'll bundle part two in shortly.
15:05Bye!
15:13APPLAUSE
15:19Oh, yes!
15:20Hello!
15:21We're back.
15:21It's the second part of the show.
15:23It was a really noisy task in motion to test the bravery of our quivering quintet.
15:27Yes, they're proactive pulpers, that's for sure.
15:30None of them knew what was happening inside the machine, but they knew they needed to keep their eggs intact
15:34at all costs.
15:35So far there have been two successful and two unsuccessful attempts, so here's Ivo Graham to upset the balance.
15:43I haven't been very good at lateral thinking tasks and I haven't been very good at egg tasks, but I'm
15:49going to find the egg.
15:55Can I move this spot?
15:57All of the information is on task.
16:00Yeah, but...
16:01...
16:14Are you now better informed?
16:15No, I wish I hadn't seen all this for you.
16:17LAUGHTER
16:19Oh!
16:23You've got five minutes left.
16:24Yep.
16:28LAUGHTER
16:28APPLAUSE
16:33Let's get pulpit.
16:44You've got three minutes left.
16:4630.
16:4730?
16:4831.
16:4833.
16:54Ten seconds.
16:55Last pulp.
17:06I felt some weird level of cries watching the Ivo frog bounce his way round.
17:12LAUGHTER
17:13I think there was immense dignity watching my body spasm with a glove bag in my mouth.
17:19LAUGHTER
17:20So it wasn't cheating?
17:22You just had to stay on the spot at all times.
17:24Oh, shit, why didn't I think of that?
17:27LAUGHTER
17:27Well, he clearly rotated it more than anyone else.
17:3056 times.
17:31Congratulations, Ivo.
17:32CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
17:35So, Jenny and May don't get any points.
17:37Apologies.
17:38Three points to Kael, four to Frankie, but of course, five to Ivo Graham.
17:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
17:44Let's have a scoreboard pass, boy.
17:45OK, it means that those two, Frankie and Ivo, are in the joint leading spot.
17:50Nine points each.
17:51Mmm.
17:52CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
17:54I think it's about time we're in another Teen Tusk.
17:56Ooh!
17:57I do too, Greg.
17:57It feels so right.
17:59So here's a pretty sweet one just for you.
18:02MUSIC PLAYS
18:17Hiya.
18:18Frankie.
18:20Hello, Ivo.
18:21Hello.
18:22Oh, my goodness.
18:24This has gone a bit SNME.
18:25Oh, OK.
18:27Hello.
18:28Ooh.
18:30It's you first.
18:31Me.
18:32Mm-hm.
18:36Do we have a safe word?
18:37You've done this before.
18:39Yeah, I'm really at home.
18:41Great.
18:41Kenny?
18:41Well, I've been arrested, obviously, but I haven't done sex games with these.
18:46Ooh.
18:48Couple more things.
18:51Jelly babies.
18:52Are they jelly babies?
18:53Yes.
18:54They're numbered.
18:55One, two, three, four, five.
19:02Completely free yourselves and have a team hug.
19:05Fastest team hug wins.
19:08Your time starts now.
19:11OK.
19:12OK.
19:12So there's a one on here and is there another number on this one?
19:16This is two.
19:18Hmm.
19:23Well, Jenny Eclaz, the chirpiest SNME I've ever met.
19:27Fun!
19:28Listen, let's focus on the task.
19:29OK, right.
19:30I'm looking forward to seeing them free themselves.
19:32OK, let's see the handcuffed threesome of May, Jenny and Kyle.
19:37There's a key here.
19:39Three.
19:39Kyle, can you reach the key?
19:40Let's try.
19:44Stretch.
19:45Come on.
19:46That's definitely impossible.
19:48First thing for a minute.
19:50I'm going to count my...
19:51I've got 15 in here.
19:52One.
19:54Hey, what's that?
19:55Menu.
19:56OK, so these are different flavoured jelly babies.
19:59OK, well, I'm going to bite the head off one and see if I've got a flavour.
20:02Four.
20:03Oh, Jesus Christ, that's the most disgusting thing I've ever eaten in my life.
20:06Six.
20:07I think it might be chicken feet.
20:09Ooh!
20:10We'd like to have the bottom half of the jelly.
20:12There's 15 in here, too.
20:13I'm going to eat one of these.
20:15Wait, but what is the...
20:16Because you want to or what?
20:18Is there a pan behind it?
20:19This is a five-digit code and there's five glasses.
20:22But then what does it prove?
20:23Take some hands.
20:23We're going to have to figure out what flavour all these are.
20:26And then we're going to have to use those.
20:27But then they're not numbered.
20:28Those aren't numbers.
20:29But that will correspond with the periodic table somehow.
20:31Before I bite anything, I need to know...
20:34Four!
20:35Yeah.
20:36Very bad, very bad.
20:38Wasabi.
20:39Wasabi.
20:39OK.
20:40Wait, but what do you mean OK?
20:41Like, OK, I've been hot.
20:43That's going to correspond with that.
20:44Like, maybe the initials of it?
20:46What's W?
20:4774.
20:53It's mint and gravy.
20:54I'm going mint and gravy.
20:55It's mint and gravy.
20:56All right.
20:56So you had wasabi.
20:57I'm going to be sick.
20:59It's mint and gravy.
21:00It's mg, which is magnesium.
21:02And what number?
21:0312.
21:04OK.
21:05So you think that I should have 12 and then go to the...
21:08Yes.
21:08So one, two, seven, four.
21:10Seven, four.
21:11OK.
21:11I'm going to keep doing them.
21:13Number three is green.
21:19You can do it.
21:24Hold on, May.
21:25If I do it one by one, it's going to give us a clue to what it might be.
21:28Because at some point...
21:29Oh, that's really clever.
21:31Yes!
21:32What was it?
21:33Zero.
21:33Zero.
21:34OK.
21:34So what starts with a zero?
21:35What starts with a zero?
21:37So it could be bacon and kale.
21:38It could be broccoli.
21:39Is that the green one?
21:41Could it be broccoli?
21:41That's a B.
21:42Zero, five.
21:43So we start with five on the next log.
21:45We're on to...
21:46OK.
21:49It's really weird.
21:51This is definitely pepper and beetroot.
21:53Oh, that's definitely beetroot.
21:54Lead.
21:5582.
21:56And then the next one was...
21:59seaweed.
22:01Oh, seaweed!
22:02I've got it!
22:02I've just got it!
22:03I really hate it.
22:04Yes, it's easy.
22:05Uh, 16.
22:09Hey!
22:14Well done!
22:15Well done!
22:16Oh, team hug!
22:21Is it fair to say that Jenny and May were the most active members of the escape committee?
22:26What I will say is that that has been edited very, very nicely in my favour.
22:34Because I was a monster in that room.
22:36LAUGHTER
22:36I'm so glad they cut it out because it was really tense.
22:40I...
22:40I wasn't putting fucking broccoli jelly babies in my mouth.
22:44LAUGHTER
22:44I mean, that much quickly became apparent.
22:47LAUGHTER
22:47It was a very difficult task.
22:49They took the same amount of time you could listen to All That I Want As Another Baby five times.
22:5417 minutes 50.
22:56APPLAUSE
22:57OK, time for a break.
22:58Just time for those couples watching who let the family dog sleep in the same bed as them.
23:03to reflect on the day you threw the towel in on your love life.
23:06Bye!
23:12APPLAUSE
23:17Hello!
23:18And a warm welcome back to part three.
23:21Tell me stuff, Alex.
23:22Sure, Greg.
23:23Well, jelly babies, the periodic table, handcuffs and the ultimate goal of a hug.
23:27That's a typical day for me.
23:29Coincidentally, they're also the main ingredients of the current team task.
23:31But how quickly will the intelligent team of Frankie and Ivo work out the conundrum,
23:35release themselves from the cuffs and embrace Victorious?
23:38Let's find out.
23:40Right.
23:42We both have a five?
23:43Sure, OK.
23:46Mm, that's quite unpleasant, isn't it?
23:48Green.
23:49Mm.
23:50It might be broccoli.
23:52In fact, it is broccoli, I think.
23:53OK.
23:54Number four is hot, should you think.
23:58Really fucking unpleasant.
23:59Could be cumin and radish.
24:00Human and radish.
24:01Yes.
24:02There must be a CR.
24:04So maybe if broccoli was B, so if we took that as five.
24:08Yeah, CR, chromium, 24.
24:11But how does that help us?
24:12Because that gives us two digits.
24:14Unless we add them together.
24:15Why don't we add two and four together to make six?
24:20Let's see what number three is.
24:21This doesn't have a lot of taste to it.
24:23Mint and gravy?
24:24Yeah.
24:26Magnesium, which is 12.
24:28So if we add those together, that would be three.
24:31Oh.
24:31No.
24:31I reckon if you just laid out the ten numbers, the first five would be padlock one and the
24:36second five would be padlock two.
24:38Well, that's complicated things.
24:40I think both the padlocks will be the same.
24:44Right now?
24:45Or like.
24:47Pepper and beetroot, maybe?
24:49PB.
24:508-2 would give us ten, which is a two-digit number, which is no use in this five-digit
24:55debacle.
24:56Adding those numbers together.
24:59You know, it does seem a waste of, you know, all these two-digit elements.
25:03Well, okay.
25:03Let's just add you.
25:05I've got so much respect for you, Frankie, but I don't think it's adding the numbers together.
25:10I've never thought that.
25:12Your system or mine.
25:15Well, let's go with yours, man.
25:16Okay.
25:17So, one, two, seven, four.
25:21Broccoli.
25:21B.
25:22So, the last number is O.
25:24Yes!
25:26And now, I'm so wrong.
25:30Start with a five.
25:32Eight, two.
25:33Get ready to hug Frankie.
25:35There's the one.
25:36Here comes the six.
25:41You're not completely free.
25:43Oh.
25:45All right.
25:52There's no key here.
25:54Oh.
25:54And the jelly baby thing.
25:57Ooh.
26:00It's not fair that you should make a task feel so like it's finally finished, and then it's
26:05just been getting started.
26:09It's right there above the periodic table.
26:12It turned into quite a big ratchet hug, I'm afraid.
26:15Not from me, baby.
26:24Both hugs for me, adorable.
26:27The handcuffed hug, particularly.
26:30You felt reticent to point out to Frankie that his system was incorrect.
26:35Well, obviously, there was a period where there was a very strong chance that Frankie's system might be correct.
26:40It's co-pilot syndrome, isn't it?
26:42Do you know, a lot of plane crashes happen because the co-pilot is too scared to say to the
26:48brash pilot, look, we're going to cut the fucking ground here.
26:52LAUGHTER
26:55And I was that guy.
26:57And during it, I asked Alex to isolate a picture of the co-pilot's face when he knew that he
27:04had the answer but wasn't sure he should say anything.
27:06This is the face?
27:07Yeah.
27:14Let's talk about points.
27:15OK, the team of three took 17 minutes and 50 seconds, the team of two took 42 minutes back.
27:26I can't wonder.
27:28I'm getting five points for the team of three.
27:30Of course it is.
27:31The team of two did achieve the task eventually.
27:33Oh, yeah, there's points.
27:35I can't give them any more than two points for that.
27:37All right, five points for the team of three, two to the team of two!
27:39There it is.
27:42Can we fit one more task in, please?
27:44Definitely, Greg.
27:45And this one begins with them making some very important decisions.
28:04This gold pen reminds me of school.
28:07Like, one boy in a year would have a gold pen.
28:09I'd have it by the end of the year, though.
28:12LAUGHTER
28:14Oh.
28:16Write down a number between zero and 100.
28:19A length of time between one minute and 20 minutes.
28:23Five ingredients.
28:24A country, a noun.
28:26And an adjective.
28:28This seems too simple.
28:30You have three minutes.
28:31Your time starts now.
28:33Why does that seem so easy?
28:35Well, and then what do I have to do with it?
28:37Presumably there's some trick involved.
28:38Number between zero and 100.
28:4150.
28:4280.
28:4342.
28:44Meaning of life.
28:4575.
28:467.
28:47Lovely.
28:49A length of time between one minute and 20 minutes.
28:51Two minutes.
28:5315 minutes.
28:5419 minutes.
28:55Four.
28:57Four.
28:57Minutes.
28:5820.
28:59Seconds.
29:00What's the meaning of life?
29:0121 seconds.
29:06One minute and 21 seconds.
29:10Five ingredients.
29:11These ingredients are going to bounce back and hit me in the face.
29:14Chilli.
29:15Cherries.
29:15Sausage.
29:16Ketchup.
29:16Bun.
29:17Mustard.
29:17Grilled onions.
29:18You know what that means?
29:20Uh, no.
29:21Hot dog.
29:22Ah.
29:23Basil.
29:24Cumin.
29:26Garlic.
29:28Salt.
29:30And...
29:31Cannellini beans.
29:33A country.
29:34Scotland.
29:35France.
29:35Guatemala.
29:37Pennell.
29:37Germany.
29:38Place to live there.
29:40Uh, noun?
29:41Uh, duck.
29:42Duck.
29:43Shoe.
29:44Dog.
29:45Bench.
29:46Large.
29:47Splendid.
29:48Feisty.
29:5012 seconds.
29:51Oh.
29:52Cowering.
29:53Gold.
29:54Is this a trick?
29:57Mmm.
29:58See you later.
29:59Alright.
30:14The adjectives are more interesting than the nouns.
30:16Duck.
30:17Duck.
30:18Shoe.
30:18Dog.
30:18Bench.
30:20But two of them went for duck, the first noun that came in.
30:22Yeah.
30:23There were a lot of ducks around the house, though.
30:25That may have been something to do with it.
30:26Yes.
30:27There were?
30:28Like...
30:28No, not real ducks.
30:30OK, OK.
30:32Shall we start with the double duckers?
30:33Double duckers.
30:33Yes.
30:34Well, they both chose duck as their go-to noun, so let's see Ivo and May together.
30:40Hello.
30:41Hi.
30:42If it isn't my dream five ingredients...
30:46LAUGHTER
30:46Make a splendid Guatemalan duck.
30:49Make a feisty French duck.
30:51You must use all these ingredients and you must also clap 80 times.
30:55And you must also clap 42 times.
30:57You have four minutes and 20 seconds.
30:59You have 19 minutes.
31:01Your time starts now.
31:07I could have picked any noun and I picked duck.
31:10So, which is a food?
31:118, 9, 80.
31:13That would be good news if any of this was...
31:16duck.
31:21Does it?
31:22Yeah, sweet corn.
31:23Sure, I saw duck.
31:24What I need is to make a mould of a duck.
31:29Christ!
31:30The time!
31:31What's a duck?
31:34Good.
31:35Really good.
31:37No.
31:38No, not so good.
31:39Why didn't I just ask for more time?
31:41I designed my own task.
31:44Oh, it's burning.
31:45It's burning.
31:45French duck.
31:48Oh!
31:50Oh!
31:54So, what else is...
31:55I think this is all about confidence.
32:07I think I've just got to just do a duck, to be honest.
32:15Good evening.
32:16Good evening, mate.
32:17I've made for you a splendid Guatemalan duck.
32:23Bonjour, Alex.
32:25Bonjour, I go.
32:28I've been busy.
32:30Too late to pop a little berry on?
32:35Do you see the beak?
32:37Do I see the wings?
32:38They were removed.
32:40It's Guatemalan because of the sauce, is it?
32:42And corn comes from Central America.
32:44Mm-hm.
32:45Splendid.
32:48Why is he French?
32:49Well, the garlic is obviously doing some pretty heavy lifting.
32:52It's too heavy to hang round the neck, unfortunately.
32:55He's got a beret on, but I did forget to do all my claps.
32:59Yeah, it's good.
33:00Really?
33:00Yeah.
33:01I like it.
33:02Thank you!
33:07May, I put it to you that your duck mould was no more useful
33:11than just chucking two piles of sweet corn onto a plate.
33:14Yeah.
33:15Did you think the end result was splendid?
33:17Actually, Alex, like, went back for a second bite.
33:20Like, it was not that bad, was it?
33:22He'll eat anything, though.
33:23All of that is true.
33:25You won't eat anything, will you, Alex?
33:26Didn't see you sort of tucking into my...
33:29All I could do, surely, was lick your duck.
33:33Niftily moving that spot around the pulper feels a long time ago now.
33:39It does make me feel quite sorry for you sometimes when you grip your head.
33:43Yeah.
33:44Like a chimpanzee whose habitat is under threat.
33:48Yeah.
33:50Oh, dear.
33:51Right.
33:51There's just one part left, and in it, someone will win today's competition
33:55and scream, yes!
33:56At last, I've won a Professor Brian Cox Pop-Tart!
33:59And a pogo stick!
34:02APPLAUSE
34:12Hello again!
34:14Welcome back to the final instalment of today's show.
34:17Alex, can you please sum up your break for me in one word?
34:19Plop!
34:20LAUGHTER
34:21But rather than go into detail, let's get the current task finished.
34:24The comics wrote down some numbers, some ingredients, a country, a noun,
34:27and an adjective, all to give them the chance to make the next part
34:30of the task nice and easy for them.
34:32Here's Frankie making a dog, Jenny making a shoe,
34:34and Kael making a bench.
34:37LAUGHTER
34:38So, these are the things I mentioned earlier.
34:39It was a trick.
34:42Meet a large Scottish dog.
34:44Make a cowering Kenyan bench.
34:46Make a gold German shoe.
34:49You must use all these ingredients.
34:51And you must also clap seven times.
34:53Fifty times.
34:54Seventy-five times.
34:56You have 15 minutes, most accurate creation wins.
35:00One minute and 21 seconds.
35:03Two minutes?
35:05Yeah, that's what you wanted.
35:12Oh, God!
35:14The time starts now.
35:18You've got just over a minute left.
35:20Oh, what?
35:21I'm going to cook that fucking potato, because this is going to be edible.
35:25We've got an eye.
35:26Oh, man.
35:30There is a gold shoe outside.
35:33Mein Geldschuh!
35:35Bitter!
35:35Jawohl!
35:38I was hoping that would look like a tail, but it just looks like it's shot everywhere.
35:42You've got 30 seconds.
35:45That goes in there like that.
35:48I feel like that.
35:51WHISTLE BLOWS
35:52WHISTLE BLOWS
35:56Hi, Frankie.
35:57Hi.
35:58What have you made me?
35:59I've made you a large Scottish dog.
36:01Look, there's the St Andrew's flag there.
36:03Oh, to show that it's Scottish?
36:05Oh.
36:06Yeah, but what's showing that it's a dog?
36:10That's dinner.
36:12It's here.
36:13It's a slightly undercooked chicken carne.
36:16Oh.
36:17I'd eat with caution and milk.
36:19I normally do.
36:21It's a cowering Kenyan bench.
36:25Please, can you show me the Kenyan aspect?
36:27It's difficult to see with the human eye.
36:30But on every part of those grilled onions, it says Nairobi.
36:35Oh.
36:35Is it?
36:36And cowering.
36:37Let's hide them from this.
36:39It's not really a sort of eating situation, is it?
36:48Very nice.
36:49Is it?
36:49This might be my perfect meal.
36:55Taste of Africa?
36:57It's delicious.
37:03Well, I suppose the obvious question, Mr. Frankie,
37:06and it's, um, have you ever seen a dog before?
37:09The big red eyes of a Scottish dog.
37:13The singular big red eye of the flowery Scottish dog.
37:17Um, in what way is, um, chilli con carne stuck in the shoe German?
37:21Other than you kept speaking like a cast member of Hello, Hello, of course.
37:26I just was trying my best.
37:29I know that you're going to tell me something that's so awful.
37:32I don't think I clapped.
37:34I don't think I fucking clapped.
37:36I don't think I clapped.
37:38Did I clap? I didn't clap.
37:40Jenny, not only did you not clap, you finished with one minute to go and sat down.
37:45LAUGHTER
37:47APPLAUSE
37:48Kyle, I have to say, it was pretty impressive that he managed to create that.
37:53And I did understand the imagery as well.
37:56I mean, I maybe questioned whether he'd had time to engrave Nairobi onto the onions.
38:02LAUGHTER
38:04It's hard to see.
38:05I genuinely was quite impressed.
38:06Was Jenny's chilli nice?
38:08The task wasn't really about whether it tasted nice.
38:11I didn't have to eat them.
38:11No, I was just making conversation, you bellend.
38:14LAUGHTER
38:16Go on, let's get on, if you like.
38:18Here are all five.
38:20Pay close attention to Frankie's, top left.
38:23Also, he didn't clap, so it's not that relevant.
38:25Well, they're all so wonderful I feel a bit mean giving zero.
38:30I would give the people who didn't clap one charity point.
38:34So, the top row, Frankie, Ivo and Jenny all one point.
38:36And the other two, and I'm sure I'll be judged very harshly for this,
38:40but I am more impressed by the bench.
38:42I am.
38:43It took only a minute.
38:44I need a scoreboard update, please.
38:49In this episode, Greg, two people who've not won a show yet could do.
38:53KL's in the lead on 15, Frankie's in joint second on 12.
38:58CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
39:00Right, then.
39:01You know the drill.
39:03Please vacate those seats for the final task of the show!
39:13CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
39:14Hello, young man.
39:16My tongue is still sore.
39:18Who will read the task out?
39:20May Martin, please.
39:21Say the word given to you by the taskmaster
39:24in the accent on the card you choose.
39:27The taskmaster will guess what accent you're doing.
39:30Highest score after three rounds wins.
39:33I hope Brian Cox is one of the options.
39:36LAUGHTER
39:36Are you ready for the first word?
39:37Yes, they've all been given a country.
39:39We're going to start with May and go from right to left.
39:41What's the first word, Greg?
39:43Taskmaster.
39:46Taskmaster.
39:50Where is May from?
39:52Scotland.
39:53Let's see on the card.
39:56Oh!
39:57LAUGHTER
39:58My whole family are from Wales, May.
40:01LAUGHTER
40:02Next up, it's Kael's.
40:04Kael, good luck.
40:05Tis, mister.
40:11South Africa.
40:13LAUGHTER
40:13What's the country, Kael?
40:15New Zealand.
40:16Oh!
40:19Jenny's turn.
40:21Taskmaster.
40:25Norwegian.
40:26Sweden.
40:28Sweden.
40:28It's so close.
40:29It is so close.
40:31High vote's turn.
40:32Taskmaster.
40:33LAUGHTER
40:36Is Disney a country?
40:38LAUGHTER
40:42Generic American in there.
40:43America?
40:45Sorry, May.
40:46Canada.
40:47Oh, close.
40:48Sort of is generic America, isn't it?
40:51No.
40:52LAUGHTER
40:56Frankie, you all right?
40:57Could get the first point in round one.
40:59Taskmaster!
41:01LAUGHTER
41:01He's from Ireland.
41:04It is from the Republic...
41:06I vote.
41:06Mr Gregory Daniel Davis.
41:09I think that's Ivo trying to sound like a street-tough New Yorker.
41:13I'm sticking with it, New York.
41:15I'm always trying to be street-tough.
41:17It's New York!
41:18CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:20Frankie.
41:22Mr Gregory Daniel Davis.
41:25LAUGHTER
41:27Absolutely easy.
41:28Belfast.
41:29Easy Impressionals.
41:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:33Man of a thousand voices.
41:36Two voices.
41:39So, round three's a little different.
41:41This time it's walking.
41:43On these cards, we've got all your names and our names.
41:47They are in there several times, so you might have the same ones twice.
41:51Grace is going to try to spot the person by the walk.
41:53May's going to start, right?
41:54Yes.
41:54OK.
41:55Good luck.
41:57Good luck.
42:00CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
42:06Whilst I personally don't think this is accurate.
42:11Jenny Eclair.
42:12Are we correct?
42:13Yeah.
42:13CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
42:41I'd love it if it's you.
42:43LAUGHTER
42:48LAUGHTER
42:51LAUGHTER
42:54LAUGHTER
42:56LAUGHTER
42:57LAUGHTER
42:59LAUGHTER
43:00LAUGHTER
43:00I know that subservient gait.
43:02LAUGHTER
43:03Alex Horne.
43:04Yes!
43:05It was Alex Horne.
43:07CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
43:08Jenny's off the mark.
43:09Now, aye vote.
43:13LAUGHTER
43:15LAUGHTER
43:17LAUGHTER
43:21It was the, in my opinion, very graceful...
43:25LAUGHTER
43:26Jenny Eclair.
43:27When does this cross into bullying?
43:30LAUGHTER
43:30I've already lost the episode.
43:32I just wanted to have a go at it.
43:34LAUGHTER
43:36APPLAUSE
43:40Oh, lovely.
43:41One left.
43:42Frankie, with an unblemished...
43:44Frankie, roll the Jenny Eclair dice.
43:46LAUGHTER
43:47LAUGHTER
43:54I think Frankie was doing Cael.
43:58May Martin!
43:59LAUGHTER
44:00And there we are.
44:02We'll add all that to the final scores and see where we get to.
44:04Come on down and join me.
44:12One of the bestest casts.
44:14Good boy.
44:15Thanks, mate.
44:15Oh, can I call you mate?
44:16Thanks, mate?
44:17No.
44:18Yes, well, Cael, May and Frankie came joint first.
44:22They each got two out of the three.
44:24So they get five points each.
44:26Well done, then.
44:28CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:29Unfortunately, thanks to Ivo throwing a go
44:30and Jenny's Newcastle abomination,
44:33they come joint fourth, so get two points each.
44:37There we go.
44:37They still did very well.
44:39You have a new winner.
44:40Never guess who it is.
44:42With 20 points, it's Cael Smith-Baino!
44:44CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:46Cael Smith-Baino wins!
44:48Please pop up to collect your proper prizes!
44:53CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:54See you again soon.
44:55But please, let's hear it once more for tonight's winner,
44:57Cael Smith-Baino!
44:59CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
45:00CELL SMITH
45:02CELL SMITH
45:04CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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