- 4 hours ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:15Oh, fuck.
00:16Okay, time to go.
00:18What is this? It's 6 a.m. Oh my God, baby. It's too early.
00:21First of all, let me be very clear. I am not your baby.
00:25Second of all, get out of my house before I call security.
00:28Are you crazy?
00:29No.
00:30Just very busy.
00:32You are seriously kicking me out after all the fun we had last night.
00:37Last night was fun for you. For me, not so much.
00:41Time to go.
00:42Rapido, rapido. Let's keep going. Keep it going.
00:46Hey, listen. Don't you know who my father is?
00:49You couldn't have had it all. I'll be treating you like a queen by now.
00:52That is quite the offer for a one-night stand.
00:54You listen to me. No man in their right mind would ever, but not ever, marry you.
00:59Do you understand? You're going to die alone, you heartless fucking cow.
01:04Well, lucky for me, I would rather die than get married.
01:07To you or to anyone.
01:09Goodbye.
01:12My shoes are still there.
01:15Fuck.
01:19You're so naughty.
01:20Oh, listen. I gotta go out there.
01:22I love you too.
01:24Well, you look happy this morning, Brian.
01:26Did your boss die or something?
01:28I don't think Satan can die.
01:31But it's promotion day, baby.
01:33I don't know how you do it.
01:35Honestly, you just have to know how to handle a filly like her.
01:38Jenna's tough.
01:39I'd rather work for Jenna than anyone else at the company.
01:41Even when she is being a cook.
01:42Oh, oh, oh, oh.
01:46A new script came in.
01:47I need you to redo the whole thing.
01:49Right.
01:51Big wigs are waiting for you in the conference room.
01:53This is it.
01:55I've worked my ass out for this.
01:57And what a fine job you've done.
02:02I know that shit, Aidingrin.
02:03What do you want?
02:05It's promotion day.
02:06For you and me.
02:08I'm just dreaming of my new window office.
02:10Ooh, out of the question.
02:11What?
02:12Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
02:13I have done everything you've asked for three years.
02:16You made a deal with me when I took this job.
02:18I stayed with you and put it with all of your...
02:20Look, Bri, I am the boss.
02:23You are the glorified secretary.
02:25I decide who gets what around here.
02:28You jump when I say jump.
02:29You bow down when I say so.
02:32Got it?
02:33Yeah.
02:35So, on your knees.
02:47That's a good boy.
02:54Don't say shit.
02:57Hi.
02:58Huh.
03:01Jenna, we've had our eye on you.
03:03And we'd like you to be the next CEO.
03:05Oh, thank you.
03:07However, there is one little snag.
03:11Well, for you to be our CEO, you're going to have to be married.
03:15Huh?
03:16That cold-hearted bitch.
03:18No promotion, huh?
03:19That's it.
03:20I'm going to quit.
03:21I'm going to go in there and tell it right to her sadistic fucking face.
03:27I'm sorry.
03:28You're saying my options are I get married in a week or I forfeit the CEO position?
03:36Where is this coming from?
03:37Shareholders.
03:41You know my son, Devin.
03:43He's our newest board member as of this morning.
03:46We know it sounds a little backward.
03:49Shareholders expect traditional family values.
03:52As a single woman, you're just too intimidating for these guys.
03:58Jenna, we need to talk.
04:01All right?
04:03I can't hold an enemy longer.
04:04Me neither.
04:05Surprise!
04:07We're engaged.
04:18We're engaged.
04:20Oh.
04:25Yep.
04:26Engaged.
04:28Brian.
04:30Seriously?
04:32It's been three years.
04:34Arnhem.
04:35Brian Arnhem.
04:35My assistant and the love of long life.
04:39Oh.
04:40Right.
04:41Is this true?
04:44Of course it is.
04:47Jenna King is my kind, sweet, loving fiancée.
04:59Damn.
05:00What do you say to her?
05:02It's all settled then.
05:03We'll get the paperwork made up immediately.
05:07Next week after the wedding, we'll make it official.
05:10Of course.
05:12Engaged means we'll be getting married next week.
05:16It's different when you say, like...
05:19Congratulations.
05:21Congratulations.
05:22See you at the wedding.
05:25You're going down, King.
05:27Not if things went the way they did last night.
05:39What the fuck?
05:41I know.
05:42What the fuck?
05:43I know.
05:45Look, they weren't going to give me the position unless I...
05:47said that I was married.
05:50I panicked.
05:51Oh.
05:52Well, you can keep panicking.
05:53Because we're not getting married.
05:55I came in here to tell you that I quit.
05:58What?
05:58And that you're a selfish asshole.
06:04Okay, that sounded a lot more harsh out loud.
06:06What are you going to do about it, huh?
06:09Fire me?
06:10You are selfish, Jenna.
06:12Yeah, but so are you, Ryan.
06:14Oh.
06:15What do you want?
06:18I want a raise.
06:20Fine.
06:21No, no, no.
06:21I want a promotion, then the raise.
06:23This is not a fucking magic lamp, Ryan.
06:25Oh, well, then I'll just tell them you lied.
06:26Oh, Devin!
06:27No, no, no, no, no, no.
06:28Okay, fine.
06:28Fine.
06:28You can have a raise.
06:31And promotion.
06:32I want your promotion.
06:33Yeah.
06:35I didn't know you were so annoying.
06:37Oh.
06:38Well.
06:40I certainly knew you were.
06:42You're engaged?
06:43Huh?
06:44How could you?
06:47Oh.
06:49What are you doing?
06:51Anything.
06:55How?
06:59It's not like you would tell your ex-girlfriend
07:01that you're even seeing someone?
07:03What?
07:04Betrayal!
07:05Tasha, come on.
07:07We went out for one drink.
07:09And then we slept together for months.
07:13Don't.
07:14Oh, don't touch me.
07:16You have no...
07:17As an inter-office relationship,
07:20you both are subjected for an HR interview.
07:23Answers to this interview are considered on the record
07:26and result in considerable fines
07:28if found to falsely represent the relationship.
07:31I mean, that doesn't sound legal.
07:33I don't make the rules, Mr. Arnhem.
07:35But I do.
07:38Isn't that funny?
07:41As you know,
07:42it's a very powerful company,
07:44which means that
07:45if we ever find out
07:46that this engagement of yours is a sham,
07:49not only will you lose the CEO position,
07:52but we will ruin you.
07:55Legal or not?
07:59Question number one.
08:01When was the first time you two were intimate?
08:07Oh, you owe me a big time.
08:11It was, uh,
08:13after the Poulsen style party.
08:15Yeah.
08:16Ms. King, uh, Jenna
08:18invited me as her plus one.
08:22Clark!
08:23Honey!
08:24You said you would do it!
08:25No, I don't want to.
08:26Hey?
08:26Stop.
08:37And, uh,
08:38we shared a very,
08:40very special night.
08:42What?
08:43Please just stop.
08:47No, I'm not.
08:48Come on.
08:49I'm not.
08:50Okay.
08:51Come on, show me.
08:51What do you got?
08:52Best move.
08:53Step touch.
08:54Okay.
08:59Come on.
09:00Um,
09:01a little bit.
09:09Let me kiss you.
09:11Such a gentleman.
09:14Time to go.
09:22Thanks a lot.
09:24Let's go.
09:25Let's go.
09:28Yep.
09:30That was the first time we were...
09:32intimate.
09:33Charmy.
09:34Moving on.
09:35What is Jenna's favorite underwear?
09:39This is ridiculous.
09:40Standard procedure.
09:42Yeah.
09:43But if you don't want to go through it,
09:44I'm more than happy to tell the board that you are receiving the offer of CEO.
09:49Black lace.
09:52From Agent Lace.
09:54Collab with Lovely Design.
09:55Is it also standard procedure to, uh, have her strip right here to prove it?
10:00He's so funny.
10:01He's so funny.
10:04Favorite movie?
10:05Speed 2.
10:07Favorite flower?
10:08Peonies.
10:09Especially when they're not in season.
10:15Well, you two seem to know a lot about each other, right?
10:18But, Brian, did you happen to know that your fiancé here, she was cheating on you last night?
10:25Well, with me.
10:30Yeah, well, we, uh, had a sort of last hurrah moment.
10:36And, uh, honestly, I'm just surprised that she spent her last hurrah slumming it with you.
10:43You two better watch her back because I'm coming for you.
10:47And I'll expose you.
10:49And then I'll ruin you both.
10:53Good luck.
10:56Tasha.
11:04That was brutal.
11:06I can't believe you slept with that guy.
11:09You're one to talk.
11:10Touché.
11:13He's right, though.
11:16If we're gonna do this, we need to really commit.
11:20You need to move in.
11:21Tonight.
11:24Here.
11:25Take my card.
11:26I'll cover any moving expenses.
11:29Look, this isn't ideal for me either.
11:32Believe me.
11:33But we need to make it at least look like we're on a united front.
11:41By the way, how did you do that?
11:42Know all the answers to the questions.
11:44It's like you were living in my brain.
11:47Jenna.
11:48It's literally my job to know and anticipate everything about you.
11:52Well, it's creepy.
11:54Hey, just be glad they didn't ask anything about me.
11:57What is that supposed to mean?
11:58You know absolutely nothing about me.
12:02That is incredibly untrue.
12:04Where am I from?
12:05A farm.
12:07Mm-hmm.
12:09Ville.
12:10Nice.
12:11How old am I?
12:12Hopefully over 18, am I right?
12:15I'm turning 30 on Sunday.
12:17Really?
12:1830?
12:18And you're still an assistant?
12:22My bad.
12:23Uh, I will take you out for a nice dinner.
12:28Sunday is the day that we're getting married.
12:30Right.
12:32Ranger?
12:35Well, this is serious, Jenna.
12:39All right, it's probably fun for you fucking around with finance bros,
12:43but this could ruin us.
12:46And you might be fine, but I could lose everything.
12:49I'm out on a limb for you.
12:51I know.
12:52I know I'm asking a lot of you,
12:54but I swear I will make it up to you.
12:57Starting today.
13:04Get off my ass.
13:11That's right, mother.
13:12Fuck!
13:17No fucking way.
13:19Welcome home, sweetheart.
13:22What did you do?
13:23You told me I needed to move in, so I moved in.
13:26It's like a fucking manosphere threw up on my house.
13:31Our house.
13:32You know, I'm starting to agree with Devin.
13:35This place could use a bit more of a masculine touch, bro.
13:39Mm-mm.
13:40Oh, and here, these receipts are for you.
13:43Get your feet off of the designer chair.
13:46Were you raised in a barn?
13:48No.
13:49The farmhouse next to the barn.
13:57Two.
14:00God, I love that.
14:06Is this a fucking waterbed?
14:07You know, my landlord would never let me have it.
14:09Where is the $3,000 California King I had custom-made?
14:13Hmm?
14:14Oh, right.
14:15Um, in the alley, being used by a wino as a toilet.
14:18Hey.
14:20Don't worry about it.
14:22Ah.
14:23Oh, come on.
14:24Now we can sleep all close and snuggly.
14:26Very cute.
14:27You know, I can see that you're pleased with yourself, torturing me.
14:30Oh, I thought you'd like it.
14:31I don't let anyone sleep with me.
14:34Not even hookups.
14:35Hmm.
14:36This is supposed to be my space away from people.
14:40My sanctuary.
14:41Our sanctuary.
14:43Finish that word.
14:45I will smother you with a pillow.
14:52If this is going to work,
14:54there are going to be certain rules that we both need to agree to.
14:58A contract.
14:59Hmm.
15:00Got it?
15:01I'm keeping the bed.
15:03Keep the bed.
15:04I will sleep in the guest room.
15:09What does our engagement contract say about consummating the marriage?
15:13Don't.
15:14Take that as a no.
15:16Okay.
15:17Engagement contract.
15:18Here are the terms.
15:21Sleeping quarters will be separate.
15:26Next, add physical affection only when required.
15:29Like, in public.
15:32Nothing gratuitous.
15:34Gratuitous?
15:37Gratuitous?
15:41You mean...
15:44Think this.
15:50Yeah, I'll try to control myself.
15:58Good.
16:00Nothing gratuitous.
16:02No dating or hooking up until the CEO paperwork is signed.
16:05And my promotion paperwork.
16:08Whatever.
16:09And...
16:10Full and total verbal commitment to each other.
16:12Blah, blah, blah.
16:13I get to pick the wedding DJ.
16:14No.
16:15No DJ.
16:16This is going to be a good old-fashioned courthouse shotgun wedding.
16:20Except I am not pregnant.
16:21Just when I thought you couldn't get any less fun.
16:23Where do I sign?
16:25We, Jenna King and Brian Arnhem, enter into this agreement of engagement willingly and of our own volition.
16:32What?
16:33Were you like a lawyer or something?
16:35Used to be.
16:39What?
16:39I practiced before I joined Purple Rabbit.
16:42Now.
16:44Sign there.
16:53Great.
16:56Great.
17:00Oh, my God.
17:04Oh, my God.
17:05Oh, my God.
17:05Oh, my God.
17:06Oh, my God.
17:07Oh, my God.
17:07Oh, my God.
17:07Hey, Jenna.
17:08It's all right.
17:09These are my parents.
17:11Mary and Cody.
17:12Oh, your parents.
17:14Your parents?
17:16And you must be Jenna.
17:17It's so nice to meet you.
17:20Appreciate y'all having us.
17:22Right.
17:23Right.
17:24Mom.
17:25Dad, what are y'all doing here?
17:27You said you couldn't make it home for your big birthday weekend because of work.
17:30So, surprise, we came to you.
17:33We went by your old place, but your roommate said you were here.
17:36And that you were getting married.
17:39Right.
17:39Yeah.
17:40We almost forgot.
17:42We're engaged.
17:43We want to hear all about the engagement.
17:45Yeah.
17:46After we unpack.
17:47After you what?
17:49Right.
17:51Lovely.
17:52Are you guys sure you wouldn't be more comfortable in, like, a hotel or something?
17:57Jenna, they'll stay in the guest room.
17:59Family stays with family.
18:01And hey, you're family now, Jema.
18:04Jenna.
18:05Plus, we want to get to know the gal that stole Bright's heart so suddenly.
18:09Right.
18:09So, how long are you guys staying?
18:12We just wanted to stay for the big birthday weekend.
18:15But now that you two are engaged, we've got weeks of planning to do.
18:22Weeks.
18:23Weeks.
18:25Weeks.
18:26Really?
18:27We will be married and divorced by then.
18:29Why didn't you tell them that we're getting married next week?
18:32Come on.
18:33A courthouse wedding would devastate my mother.
18:35She's so excited about this.
18:36Just play along for a few days until I find a time to tell her.
18:40Fine.
18:41But remember when I said I don't like people invading my privacy?
18:44Well, yeah, I was going to ask you about that.
18:46Are you just afraid of people knowing the real you, or is it more of a preservation thing?
18:49Stop guessing about my neuroses.
18:53I wouldn't have to guess if you'd just trust me.
18:59I do trust you.
19:02Obviously.
19:03No.
19:04You trust me with your schedule and your dry cleaning.
19:07Alright?
19:08I know almost everything about you.
19:11You know nothing about me.
19:16Am I wrong?
19:19I'll sleep on the floor.
19:21Uh-uh.
19:23I am just as stubborn as you.
19:25And twice the gentleman.
19:27You're on the bed.
19:43Hello?
19:53When I come out to the spot.
19:55Got me cooking on heat.
19:57You're my apple.
19:58Tazer.
19:59Buffet.
20:06Joining me?
20:12You know, for somebody who loves their privacy, you sure hate knocking.
20:16Could you just put some clothes on, please?
20:19This is incredibly inappropriate.
20:21What do you say, boss?
20:23Oh, yes.
20:24Speaking of, do your parents know who I am?
20:26What do you mean?
20:28Do they know I'm your boss?
20:29Probably not.
20:31You know, usually I just refer to you by one of my pet names.
20:35What pet names?
20:38Satan.
20:39Satan's mistress.
20:40Devil incarnate.
20:41The dark princess of the underworld.
20:44Mainly just variations on the same theme.
20:46Unbelievable.
20:49Truly.
20:53I don't think this will fit.
20:55I don't think it's a good idea for me to play hooky from work right now.
20:58You know, important business things and assistant.
21:00You could be sick one day.
21:01That witch doesn't deserve you.
21:03Right, Jenna?
21:05I'm sure that witch could do a day without you.
21:09Could she?
21:10It's not like she has anything hugely important going on.
21:15Okay, we'll have fun.
21:17Aren't you coming?
21:18Didn't you say you were between jobs?
21:20I did say that.
21:22Mm-hmm.
21:23Good.
21:24So, what do you have in mind?
21:27There's a lookout at the top of the mountain!
21:29Come on, slowpokes!
21:31Sightseeing is very different than hiking, Brian.
21:34Oh, God.
21:36Oh, God.
21:38I...
21:41Oh, God.
21:42Oh.
21:45I just...
21:46I just need to say...
21:48I just need to say...
21:49Oh, hey, hey, hey.
21:57Okay, so...
21:59More of an inside, girly.
22:00Noted.
22:01I run every morning.
22:03Right.
22:05Cut like a...
22:06On a treadmill, like a civilized person.
22:11This is my nightmare.
22:14What?
22:16Well, all of this.
22:17Strangers in my home.
22:19Hugging me.
22:20A wedding!
22:21A wedding!
22:22Oh, my God.
22:23The thought of a poofy white dress...
22:27Literally makes me want to puke.
22:32Well, if it's any consolation, I really do appreciate you being here.
22:36You know, it means so much to my parents to be here with me, and...
22:40They are psyched about you.
22:43Family is everything.
22:45Family is overrated.
22:47Oh, speaking of, I did invite your parents to the wedding.
22:51What?
22:53Just kidding.
22:55Sort of.
22:57I know family's not really your thing, but I did make a few fake invitations and left
23:00them on my desk.
23:02And just to really sell it, I just went to Mr. and Mrs. King.
23:08Is this fun for you?
23:10Terrorizing me?
23:11Oh, immensely.
23:13What do you do for fun?
23:14Besides feast on the unborn?
23:16Um, close the red floor stories deal.
23:19Um, review development slates, sign paychecks, manage schedules, order coffee.
23:24Work, work, work.
23:26You know, there is such a thing as work-life balance, right?
23:29That is the funniest thing I have ever heard.
23:31Do you think I like being this way?
23:34I have been there since I graduated, and I still have to work twice as hard for them
23:38to take me seriously.
23:41You're right.
23:42What?
23:43It must suck.
23:46You are the most talented producer they have, by far.
23:50And it must suck to have to prove yourself time and time again.
23:53Oh God, especially when idiots like Devin just prance on in because they have a dick.
24:00Granted, I assume it's a pretty small, oddly shaped dick.
24:04Yeah.
24:05But you do deserve better.
24:14Okay, now on to the top.
24:17Buck up, buttercup.
24:26Ma, here, I know how much you love your chocolate chips.
24:28Oh, thank you, dear.
24:30I sure do love my chocolate chip cookies.
24:34Jenna, that salad looks delicious.
24:37Oh, yeah, it's a chopped salad.
24:40Are you kidding me?
24:41That's not just any chopped salad.
24:43That's the chopped salad.
24:44Extra chopped, no basil, no spices, just the way she likes it.
24:47Wow.
24:48You're going to make a great husband, Bri.
24:54Right, yes.
24:55Thank you, babe.
24:57Right.
25:03Oh, you don't have to be shy in front of us, kids.
25:06You know, when your father proposed, he couldn't keep his hands off me.
25:09Still can't keep it.
25:11Stop it!
25:12No, sir, no, sir.
25:13No, sir, no, sir.
25:13You won't horned off me.
25:14Please don't.
25:15Yeah.
25:16Sorry.
25:18Hey, you know, the old ball and chain.
25:23I am not old.
25:25Oh, well, you certainly act a lot older than you are then.
25:30Yeah?
25:31Yeah.
25:31At least I don't act like a frat boy.
25:33Right.
25:34Right.
25:35Right.
25:35Right.
25:43Oh, my.
26:02Anybody want a drink?
26:03I know I do.
26:08Right.
26:11Oh, pull yourself together, man.
26:13It's a contract.
26:14Strictly professional.
26:16Right.
26:18Hi.
26:19Do you have anything stronger than coffee?
26:24So, Jenna, tell us what you have planned.
26:28For what?
26:29Oh, a movie, probably.
26:33No, silly.
26:34The wedding.
26:35You are a hoot.
26:38Yeah, probably just something simple like a courthouse.
26:44Probably next week.
26:45Oh, a good old-fashioned shotgun courthouse wedding.
26:49Exactly.
26:50Except I'm not pregnant.
26:52No.
26:54No, you can't be getting married in some dusty old courthouse.
26:57Sweetie, last minute we can work with.
27:00But this is going to be your wedding day.
27:02It's fine.
27:03Don't worry, Jenna B.
27:04I will help you every step of the way.
27:07We'll start today.
27:09Ah, I'm actually...
27:10Oh.
27:12What did I miss?
27:13We are going wedding dress shopping.
27:16Oh!
27:18She loves dresses.
27:20Especially wedding dresses.
27:21There's bourbon in here.
27:22Drink.
27:27Oh, isn't everything just so beautiful?
27:32Don't you just love love?
27:34Uh-huh.
27:38Is something the matter?
27:42Maybe this is also complicated.
27:45Oh, sweetheart.
27:47I'm not going to lie to you.
27:48Marriage is complicated.
27:50If you follow your heart, you always end up in the right place.
27:54And I could see how good and big your heart is, Jenna.
27:58I don't know about that.
28:00It is.
28:01You've got to believe it.
28:06Showtime!
28:09Hit me back.
28:11Never make care.
28:14Tell me something.
28:15You better not share.
28:17You're getting ambitious.
28:20But falling too deep.
28:21Digging ways out close.
28:23You promised to be in.
28:25So never give in to my natural emotions.
28:29Oh, keep in your head that you know the real.
28:31To survive.
28:33Never give in to my natural emotions.
28:37Keep in your head that you know that it just takes some time.
28:41Oh, just takes time.
28:47Oh, just takes time.
28:49Oh, just takes time.
28:51Oh, just takes time.
29:02I think you found the one.
29:05All right.
29:10Jenna, you feeling okay?
29:13You're looking a little pale.
29:15Yeah, yeah, it was probably just the hiking, champagne, and dancing.
29:22Oh, what?
29:25I think I'm going to faint.
29:27Jenna.
29:27Oh.
29:28Jenna, Jenna.
29:29You okay?
29:34Yeah.
29:35Yeah, I'm good.
29:36I'm good.
29:36I'm good.
29:37Hey.
29:39You look beautiful.
29:40Oh, no.
29:46She'll be fine.
29:48Take her home.
29:50Here.
29:51Come on.
29:53We'll get you some rest.
29:55Whoa, whoa, whoa.
29:57You know, you weren't kidding.
29:59When you said wedding dresses really disagreed with you.
30:01Not the time, Bri.
30:03I don't even know what happened.
30:05Oh, I talked to the doctor.
30:07He said you just had too much fun.
30:10A little bit of rest and you'll be right back on your feet.
30:14Oh, God.
30:14Oh, God.
30:15Oh, God.
30:16Hey, hey.
30:17Here.
30:20You can have my special blanket.
30:23Yeah, there you go.
30:26Some water over here if you need it to.
30:28Your mom's really sweet, by the way.
30:30Your whole family is.
30:33We'll see where you get it.
30:36Was that a compliment?
30:38Maybe we should take you to the ER.
30:40Don't stop.
30:41Don't make me laugh at my weekend's tape.
30:45Sorry, sorry.
30:48I don't think anyone's ever actually taken care of me before.
30:52Really?
30:52But you make it so easy.
30:58My parents never really cared about me like that.
31:01It's like their careers and lives were so much more important than me.
31:04Yeah, growing up, I was a parent.
31:08And I think I just started seeing and believing, really, that showing vulnerability was a weakness.
31:17Yeah.
31:18Well, that sounds pretty hard.
31:19Made me a good producer.
31:21But a bad partner, I think.
31:23You're not a bad anything, Jenna.
31:26Like, we're all humans.
31:29Just trying our best.
31:33Except Devin.
31:34Oh, yeah.
31:35Except Devin.
31:36Fuck that guy.
31:37Fuck that guy.
31:39Okay.
31:43Well, fuck Devin.
31:44Yeah, fuck Devin.
31:50Fuck.
31:55Fuck.
31:58Fuck.
31:59Fuck.
32:00Fuck.
32:30Whatever they have in hell.
32:31Right.
32:33Because I'm the devil.
32:40Um.
32:45It was really sweet of you to take care of me.
32:48What?
32:50Are you still sick?
32:53Do you have a fever or something?
32:55I.
32:57It feels really nice.
33:09Are you feeling good?
33:19I gotta go.
33:27I gotta go to work.
33:28Bye.
33:34Oh my god.
33:36I love Brian.
33:45Okay, come on.
33:48Wow.
33:49I really have no friends to talk to.
33:51Maybe Brian was right about this whole work-life balance.
33:56Oh shit, my meeting.
33:58Okay, that is a problem for future Jenna.
34:00Just get it together, babe.
34:01And stop talking to yourself.
34:04Starting now.
34:08Okay.
34:11So, with the new script changes.
34:13I wish Brian was here.
34:17Schedule changes.
34:18I can't believe she slept with my husband.
34:21Did I just say husband?
34:23You seem a little distracted, Jenna.
34:26No.
34:27Not a good look for the next CEO.
34:29No, no.
34:30Everything, everything is good.
34:31Everything is great.
34:32Let's just pick this up after the wedding.
34:34You seem to have a lot on your mind right now.
34:37It's like...
34:40Yeah.
34:43Tick, tock, tick, tock.
34:46It all falls down.
34:49It's two different nursery rhymes, you moron.
34:52Did you just call me a moron?
34:57Okay, I'm just gonna...
35:02Tell him that I have real feelings and...
35:05You'll be able to think straight.
35:09Jenna, I met your new neighbor.
35:18Clark?
35:21Long time no see, Jenna.
35:23Oh, you two know each other.
35:26I'll start dinner so you can catch up.
35:28Brian will be home soon.
35:30Who?
35:31Uh, Brian, he's...
35:34He'll be home soon.
35:35Okay.
35:37So what are you doing here?
35:39Funny enough, just moved in.
35:40Down the street.
35:42Why?
35:43You hate this neighborhood.
35:45Things change.
35:46People change.
35:48Look, I'm not the man who I once was.
35:50Okay?
35:51I'm not the one who let you get away.
35:58What we had...
36:00It was special.
36:01You can't deny that.
36:02I...
36:03I don't know what to say.
36:04Say it's not too late.
36:06Is it?
36:09Right.
36:14I'm engaged.
36:15Didn't answer my question.
36:16You left me.
36:18You broke my heart.
36:19You don't know how sorry I am, truly.
36:21I wasn't ready then, but I am now, okay?
36:25I'll prove it to you.
36:27I don't have time for this.
36:29Do you love him?
36:30If you do, just tell me.
36:32I'll leave you alone for good.
36:34Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
36:39Clark, would you like to join us for dinner?
36:42Um, no, no.
36:45Sure.
36:46Hey.
36:51Come on.
36:52Dad, if you don't mind.
36:53Oh, sure.
36:54Yeah.
36:57Here you go, pal.
36:59Thanks for coming.
37:00Yeah.
37:00Appreciate it.
37:01Look at this.
37:02All right.
37:03Let's set that screen.
37:05Ooh.
37:06Nice.
37:07Comfy.
37:08Yeah, that's about right.
37:12Craig, could you pass the wine?
37:18Brian, did you pass the wine?
37:27I'll do it myself.
37:31Clark said you two go way back.
37:33Yeah, I knew Jen before all sass, no frass.
37:38I rather like strong, independent Jenna.
37:42Sass and all.
37:44Well, any Jenna's better than no Jenna, right?
37:49Uh, Jenna, uh, any wedding progress today?
37:54Oh, no, we're still planning.
37:57I thought you hated planning weddings.
38:00People change, right?
38:25I know you and Clark dated, but were you ever in love with him?
38:35We were engaged.
38:46Glad to see you're still running.
38:49Mind if I join?
38:56May I?
38:57May I?
39:04There.
39:05All right, come on.
39:12Come here.
39:26Well, hey, it was great catching up, Jen
39:30What's up, Brian?
39:33What's up?
39:39Did you eat breakfast?
39:42I did
39:45That plate's for you
39:47Although, I see you are gay
39:48Got a little something left
39:51He is harmless, Brian, really
39:55Brian, we're going to be late to meet my parents
39:59You should put a shirt on
40:10Oh my god
40:11It's so good, you like it?
40:12It's delicious and very good
40:20Here, Brian, give Jim some of this
40:25Here you go, sweetie
40:30If it isn't the happiest couple ever
40:37That's a spirit
40:44These are the board members of my company
40:46The big day is almost here
40:47Are you getting excited?
40:49Over the moon, I just have to figure out how to smuggle a wedding cake into a courthouse
40:53Oh, no, you can't get married to the courthouse
40:57Devin, call the staff
40:59Tell them to prepare the house for a wedding this Sunday
41:02Can we at least offer you some cake?
41:06Oh, no, no, he's probably really busy
41:10He's got lots of meetings going on
41:12Usually very
41:15I need you to meet me at the cafe right now
41:20How are you guys doing?
41:21Oh my god
41:22Come right on in
41:24Really good
41:24You know what?
41:25I just realized we haven't heard the proposal story yet
41:28It must be amazing, huh?
41:29So good
41:30Please, tell us about it
41:32It was actually a really funny story
41:35Really?
41:36Clark
41:41Clark!
41:42Clark?
41:44I thought your name was Brian
41:50Why don't you join us?
41:52We're just hearing about the proposal story
41:54What?
41:55If I do
41:55Go on, Jenna
42:01It was our anniversary
42:03And, um
42:07He wrote me a poem
42:10It was so sweet
42:12And masculine
42:14And hot
42:15And then he took me to a poetry reading
42:20I didn't know you liked poetry, son
42:22I don't
42:23But apparently Jenna does
42:25You know
42:26Ode to a fancy urn is my favorite
42:29Go on, babe
42:30Why don't you
42:30Tell the rest
42:31Fine
42:33I will
42:35And then he cried
42:37And he cried
42:38And he cried
42:39And then he got down on Whitney
42:40And he proposed
42:41Yeah, well that's not exactly how I remember it
42:43Fine
42:43Then you tell them
42:49Pre-wedding jitters
42:53What the hell are you doing?
42:54Besides single-handedly keeping up this narrative?
42:56No, I mean turning into an unrecognizable puddle the moment Clark walks into the room
43:00What are you talking about?
43:01Oh, you know exactly what I'm talking about
43:03Are you jealous?
43:04No, this is a contract marriage
43:06Okay, so then what is it?
43:07You're putting us both in jeopardy
43:09Alright, do I need to remind you that I have real stakes in this?
43:12My family
43:12I'm lying to them
43:13Okay, well I'm sorry if I don't know what you're into
43:15Maybe you like poetry
43:16I don't know
43:17Anything
43:18About me
43:20That is not fair
43:21It is not my job
43:23To know things about you
43:24You're right
43:26But you never tried to either
43:40Came to check on you
43:42I'm fine
43:43Couldn't sleep
43:44I know you, Jack
43:46You're not okay
43:49This whole wedding thing
43:52Brian
43:52Drives me nuts
43:54He does seem a little, uh
43:55High-strung
43:57Yeah, yes
43:58He's always, like, doing things for me
44:00Not, like, in a patronizing way
44:02In, like, a supportive way
44:04And he's ambitious and smart
44:07Which is annoying
44:10And he listens to me
44:11Which is so weird
44:14Jack
44:14I can't stop thinking about you
44:18Can I kiss you?
44:27I'm marrying Brian in two days
44:29Look, I messed up
44:30I can see that now
44:31But
44:32If you have an ounce
44:33Of feeling the way I feel about you
44:35Then
44:36You should be mine
44:38I want to marry you
44:39What?
44:42I thought you said
44:43Marriage was a loss of independence
44:45It's worth it
44:46To be with a person you love
44:50Yeah
44:52Yeah, you're right
44:58Hey
44:59Think about it
45:08Did you buy it?
45:09Every word
45:11Sweet
45:13Very sweet
45:16Just play the part
45:18Until she falls for you
45:19And break it off with that loser, Brian
45:21Then you're gonna be free to leave her again
45:23And I'll get you
45:24The rest of your money
45:25You got it
45:26I'm so glad you're a gang
45:27Win-win for me
45:28I get paid
45:29I might get some tail
45:30In the meantime
45:31I kind of forgot how hot she is
45:33I like you, Clark
45:37Hey, hey, hey
45:39We need to talk
45:42I need your help
45:44To teach someone a lesson
45:48Like a team?
45:50You are a team
46:00I thought you said
46:00You hated hiking
46:03Well, like you said
46:05People change
46:05I'm glad you called this morning
46:07Look, I like Bri
46:09But no one
46:11Makes me feel the way you do
46:23God, I've missed you
46:29Can we, baby?
46:31Here?
46:32Hey
46:33I am all yours
46:34Yeah
46:35Do whatever you want
46:36What about Brian?
46:37What about Brian?
46:45I don't have to take my shoes and socks off, right, babe?
46:47I mean, there's pokey stuff everywhere
46:49That actually depends
46:51I don't know if you want to hike down fully nude or not
46:58I think I'm going to puke
46:59I think I'm going to puke
47:01Oh, God
47:02I know this was part of the plan
47:03But watching that was truly sickening
47:05Oh, at least you don't have his tongue in your mouth
47:07Whoa, whoa, whoa
47:08What's going on?
47:10We need to talk
47:11There is nothing between me and Clark
47:15There was at one time
47:16But that is over
47:18I am marrying you
47:22Go to bed
47:26Every time you come into my life
47:27You fuck it up
47:29You're the reason I didn't want to get married
47:31You are a pathetic
47:34Impotent excuse for a man
47:37Even if I hadn't seen this video
47:39Of you and your little dirtbag boyfriend this morning
47:42I knew you were up to something
47:44So I strung you along until I could figure it all out
47:47Wow
47:48Thank you for coming to Jenna King's TED Talk
47:50Kobe!
47:51Oh, no, no
47:51Oh, come on
47:55That's fine
47:56Thanks for doing this
47:57Have a nice hike down
47:59Douchebag
47:59Right in half
48:01Bye
48:08Oh, dear
48:09You look beautiful
48:11Thank you
48:12I want you to meet Grandma Sandra
48:14She has something special for you
48:16Grandma
48:18Welcome to the family
48:21We want you to have this
48:23Oh, I really
48:25Oh, yes
48:27Absolutely
48:27Yes, yes
48:28We insist
48:29It's an Arnhem family heirloom
48:32And we want you to know
48:34Every time you look at it
48:36That you belong
48:38Farming
48:39Fun
48:40And family
48:42Family
48:57Hey, now
48:58I told Jenna this already
49:01But I got the whole CEO paperwork right here
49:04Now, during the wedding ceremony
49:06You're going to sign the marriage certificate
49:08But you'll also sign this
49:10Make it all official
49:12Welcome to married life, son
49:14All right
49:18That's your last chance, bro
49:21I know it's all lies, lies, lies
49:25I'm going to make a deal for both of us
49:27So we can get what we want
49:28If you owe Jenna
49:30I'll promote you to her job
49:33And I'll pay you three times the raise
49:36But if you go up
49:37And sign that deal
49:39I'm going to make good on my promise
49:41To ruin both of you
49:42My offer stands for five more seconds
49:45Five
49:47Four
49:48Three
49:50Two
49:52You know what, you're right
49:54You are very consistent
49:57Consistently the biggest D-bag I have ever seen
50:01Enjoy having Jenna as your new CEO
50:05Bye
50:12Thank you
50:14Thank you
50:14That's all
50:15Thank you
50:35That's all
50:52I'm going to make good on my mind
50:54I'm going to make good on my mind
50:54I'm going to make good on my mind
50:55I'm going to make good on my mind
50:55I'm going to make good on my mind
50:55I'm going to make good on my mind
50:56I'm going to make good on my mind
51:04I'm going to make good on my mind
51:17It, uh, looks like our pan's gonna go off without a hitch.
51:23You sure about this?
51:27Stop the wedding!
51:32Oh, shit.
51:36Oh, my God.
51:41This marriage is a sham.
51:44As you can see in this contract right here, dated a week ago.
51:50I told you you shouldn't have kept it.
51:51Not the time, Bri.
51:52They have deceived this company.
51:54And they have deceived all of you, ladies and gentlemen.
51:57Oh, my God.
52:00What's he talking about?
52:01I'm very glad you asked.
52:03In order to get promoted, Jenna, right here, forced her assistant, Brian, to marry her.
52:15Is this true, Jenna?
52:28You know, you would have made a really shitty lawyer.
52:32What?
52:33Look at the bottom of that page.
52:37I didn't sign that.
52:40Jenna, you can wave that piece of paper around all you want.
52:44It's not gonna do anything for you.
52:46Because I made a promise to Jenna that I would marry her.
52:50And that's exactly what I'm gonna do.
52:52You didn't sign the contract?
52:54Nope.
52:57So you did all of this because you're a good person.
53:06I'm sorry.
53:07I can't do this.
53:09What?
53:12You have given me so much.
53:14What are you doing?
53:15You've given me years of your life.
53:17I threatened to ruin your career.
53:20I forced you to lie to everyone.
53:23I forced you to pretend to be in love with me.
53:26Look, you don't have to do this.
53:27You cannot stop.
53:28I'm sorry you ever met me.
53:32Wait.
53:37Just let me go.
53:39Trust me.
53:45I don't deserve this.
53:47No.
53:48I don't deserve to be a part of your family.
53:51You don't get to decide this.
54:05I guess she did all the dirty work to ruin both of you.
54:12That's why you'll never be CEO.
54:15What?
54:15Devin, you are an embarrassment to this company and to our family.
54:21If you insist on acting like a child, you are going to be treated as one.
54:26Go to your room and stay there.
54:29Dad, please.
54:30Daddy, I can explain.
54:32Please.
54:43So how you doing, son?
54:45Pretty shitty, Dad.
54:49I'm sorry I lied to y'all.
54:51You do what you have to do for true love, including never giving up.
55:01Everyone can go home.
55:02It's over.
55:03She's gone.
55:08It's not over, Brian.
55:10Go find her.
55:12So what are you waiting for, son?
55:31Jenna.
55:33It's me.
55:35I know you're in there.
55:48Can I come in?
55:50I don't deserve this.
55:54Not after everything I've done.
55:58But you don't love me.
56:01This is all fake.
56:03I don't think you can fake the kind of connection we have.
56:06Do you?
56:08Why are you doing this?
56:10You don't need me.
56:12They offered you my position.
56:14Jenna, I quit.
56:17You what?
56:22Why?
56:23They, Devin offered you the position.
56:25That's your dream job.
56:27Why would you do that?
56:28I don't want to be anywhere you're not.
56:30Brian, I'm...
56:30Look, I know what you're going to say.
56:32Okay?
56:33Because I know you.
56:34Better than anyone else.
56:38And I also know that I love you.
56:50And I have loved you.
56:52From the day that I met you, Jenna King.
56:56And even when I've hated you, which I have many, many times.
57:03I've still always been head over heels in love with you.
57:08So, what do you say?
57:11No contracts, no professional strings attached.
57:22Will you marry me?
57:25For real?
57:28I love you, Brian.
57:42Brian, do you take Jenna to be your lawful wedded wife?
57:46So, this is what you wanted?
57:48Do you get married tonight?
57:49I do.
57:52I don't want to spend another birthday without you.
57:55And Jenna?
57:56I do, too.
57:57You may now kiss your bride.
58:01I'm here in the dark
58:04Wondering where you are
58:08I still wish upon
58:11Hanging on the road
58:16Hanging on for this
58:27Put the script in Cayman's hands
58:29See if he likes it
58:30Okay, oh
58:30Hi
58:33Oh, hey, could you get me a coffee?
58:34What happened to our new assistant?
58:35Amy's out there at the desk
58:36Uh, Amy, could you grab us two lattes?
58:38Sure thing, boss
58:40I'm the really tall guy
58:42Yeah
58:43I'm the the real one
58:48I'm the, the real one
58:53One thing
58:53I need my life
58:53I need my life
58:54You're the real one
58:55I need my life
Comments