00:00Here's how to actually set a boundary in the simplest three steps possible.
00:05Number one, you set the expectation.
00:07You tell the person, hey, this is what I will do or I won't do.
00:11Mom, I don't talk about my work life with you anymore.
00:13Or when we plan something together as friends, we all show up on time.
00:18Number two, state the consequences for breaking that expectation.
00:22Mom, if you keep bothering me about my job, I'm just going to hang up the damn phone.
00:27Or Susie, when you show up an hour late to the concert next time, I'm just going to go in
00:31without you.
00:32Number two point five, listen to all of their awkward defensive excuses.
00:37Listen to them be like, oh, I'm sorry.
00:41Oh, so uptight.
00:43Aren't you just little Miss Princess?
00:45Don't buckle.
00:46Ben, don't break.
00:48Everybody's going to have a little snide comment to make.
00:51That's just part of it.
00:52Number two point seven five, watch them test the boundary.
00:56Because nobody, and I mean nobody, adheres to a boundary on the first shot.
01:01It's human nature to test boundaries and they will absolutely test yours.
01:07And then number three, hold the boundary.
01:09Show them that you mean fucking business.
01:12Step negative 5,000.
01:14Setting boundaries is not cutting people out of your life for dumb reasons
01:17or ghosting people just because you don't like how they make you feel.
01:21That is fucking selfishness and cowardice.
01:24Boundaries are stating what actions or behaviors you will tolerate or don't tolerate
01:29and then announcing the consequences for those actions and behaviors
01:32and then living by them.
01:34It is not deleting people from existence.
01:37It is not deleting people from existence.
01:37It is not deleting people from existence.
01:38It is not deleting people from existence.
01:38It is not deleting people from existence.
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