- 2 days ago
Waiting to Ex ~ Sale
Jonesy is scared to donate blood because of a childhood experience of getting hit in the nose with a soccer ball, unlike Jude who is obsessed with donating blood because he wants the free donuts the nurse gives away to the people who donate. Meanwhile, Caitlin and Jen wait in line for a once-in-a-lifetime sale at Albatross & Finch, but the line to get in is extremely long
Jonesy is scared to donate blood because of a childhood experience of getting hit in the nose with a soccer ball, unlike Jude who is obsessed with donating blood because he wants the free donuts the nurse gives away to the people who donate. Meanwhile, Caitlin and Jen wait in line for a once-in-a-lifetime sale at Albatross & Finch, but the line to get in is extremely long
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TVTranscript
00:10What a fine day here on the reef.
00:13It sure would rock to have a finned friend to frolic with.
00:17Hi, Small Blue and Scaly.
00:20Do you cruise here often?
00:22Well, I will now that I'm digging your dorsal.
00:26You two do not belong here.
00:28You must leave this place.
00:29It is the evil warlord, the destroyer of mellowness.
00:34I am not evil warlord.
00:36I am owner.
00:37If you do not buy sushi, you do not play with fish tank.
00:41Now, leave.
00:46Warfish tank theater.
00:48Wreck it.
00:49Wreck it.
00:50Wreck it.
00:51Okay, you can stay.
00:52But from now on, I am benevolent emperor, not evil warlord.
00:57Warfish tank theater.
00:58Warfish tank theater.
01:01Encore.
01:10Can we get on with this?
01:12I like being late for work to be my idea.
01:14But Jen's not here.
01:15My news is too big for her to miss.
01:17This better be good, because I've got a whole mall of babes to scope.
01:21Sorry, I'm late.
01:24I'm late.
01:24Coach Holder.
01:25Psycho.
01:26Stopwatch.
01:27Need Lemon Whip.
01:29Stat.
01:33Ah.
01:34Enjoy it, because it's my last one.
01:37Huh?
01:40Is that what I think it is?
01:42Yes.
01:43I got my credit card back.
01:46I can shop again.
01:48I thought your dad took your card away when you maxed it out.
01:50He did.
01:51But as of yesterday's paycheck, I paid him back.
01:54Wow.
01:55Good for you.
01:55Are you sure going shopping with a credit card in your purse is such a good idea?
01:59Don't worry.
02:00I'm just going to buy a little celebratory tank top and maybe a pair of flip-flops.
02:04No biggie.
02:05Uh-oh.
02:07Don't worry.
02:08I've learned my lesson.
02:11Hey, where are you going?
02:12I'm leaving.
02:13But who's going to work the squeeze?
02:15Katie starts today.
02:16She's super nice.
02:18I don't think she knows about the hat yet.
02:20Whoa.
02:20It's going to be really weird not seeing you here all the time.
02:24I'll still be at the mall, silly.
02:26I just won't be working here.
02:28Okay.
02:29So, see you at lunch?
02:31Oh, I wish I could, but there's a totally secret sample sale on at Vaughn Ditch.
02:34The lineup will take hours.
02:36Gotta run.
02:38We might want to have a little chat with that girl.
02:41What if we just tie her up?
02:49We've got to find her.
02:50What if she doesn't listen to us?
02:52Then we set her up with a month's worth of dates with Wayne.
02:55Ew.
03:00Sweet new gig, Jonesy.
03:02This info booth is in a seriously high traffic area.
03:06Given the law of averages, I should hook up with tons of chicks.
03:08So you're cool with the whole single thing again?
03:11I mean, Nikki and you just...
03:13Please!
03:13Nikki was a phase!
03:15The Jonesmeister is too much guy to be dating one chick.
03:18Yeah, but you two seem so happy.
03:20Jude, I'm a free agent again.
03:22What could make me more happy than that?
03:25I've got my pick of the babe litter.
03:27Hey, boy.
03:32I mean, just look at you and freaky vegan chick.
03:35Star?
03:35Right.
03:36Whether you know it or not, she's got you on a short leash.
03:39Does not.
03:40Next thing you know, she'll be repainting your board to match her nails.
03:46I gotta go.
03:47Star's waiting for me.
03:50Come, Jude.
03:51Good boy.
03:53Bite me.
03:56Excuse me.
03:57Can you direct me to the penalty box?
04:00Wait.
04:00Watch this.
04:02Go down this corridor.
04:04Take the stairs to the second floor.
04:05Do a full circuit of that level.
04:07Turn left.
04:07Come down the stairs again.
04:08Do a circuit counterclockwise.
04:10And it's the last door on your right.
04:12You can't miss it.
04:16Remember to keep hydrated.
04:18Dude, the penalty box is right there.
04:21Yeah, but it's so much more fun to make them work for it.
04:24Ha ha ha.
04:25Sweet.
04:26Later, dude.
04:26But I thought we were gonna hang out.
04:30There she is.
04:32Caitlin.
04:32Hi, guys.
04:34Aw.
04:34You've come to see me christen my credit card.
04:37That is so sweet.
04:39Are you sure you can handle this?
04:41Last time you had plastic, it almost landed you in debtor's prison.
04:44They abolished those ages ago.
04:47I checked.
04:49Caitlin, you could get into big trouble.
04:52So that's why you came over here.
04:54I just spent a year wearing a lemon on my head to make up for the money I spent, remember?
04:59Give me a little credit.
05:01Okay, okay.
05:02Maybe we were out of line.
05:03Sorry, but promise me you'll only buy one thing here today?
05:07Okay, I promise.
05:08Great.
05:09I have to go to work.
05:10Me too.
05:11See you guys at break.
05:12Right.
05:12Bye.
05:13Now, don't you let them upset you.
05:16They're just jealous.
05:17Caitlin.
05:18There you are.
05:20Who, me?
05:21Come on.
05:22Just pretend you're with us.
05:23You remember Gwen and Mandy.
05:25Yeah.
05:26Hi.
05:28So, where does it you quit your loser job at the Big Snooze?
05:32Squeeze.
05:33Whatever.
05:33This is my favorite sale of the entire year.
05:36Check it out.
05:37Jeremy got us these coupons for an extra 25% off here.
05:41Um, I thought you hated me.
05:45Okay, maybe I've been a bit of a cow, but that doesn't mean we can't still be friends.
05:51Okay, friends.
05:53Great.
05:53And I've got the skinny on three other secret sales today.
05:57Hey!
05:58Okay, two at a time.
06:00Time to get your shop on.
06:02Okay, but I'm only buying one thing.
06:04Only one thing per store, right?
06:06Oh, right.
06:07Right!
06:07Mm-hmm!
06:09Mm-hmm!
06:12Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!
06:33Ha, ha, ha!
06:49Nikki, I feel so badly about not trusting Caitlyn.
06:53All right.
06:54Masterson, is that a personal call?
06:55Uh, no.
06:57And why are your sales so low today?
06:59Uh, it's a slow day.
07:01Nonsense.
07:02The mall is hopping.
07:03Just look at those girls there.
07:04They look like shopping MVPs.
07:10Well, that's funny.
07:11I thought there were two of them.
07:15Just wait till I get my hands on her.
07:17That's the spirit, Masterson.
07:19Try the customers in if you have to.
07:22Attagirl.
07:22Excuse me.
07:23What are all those bags?
07:24Wait.
07:25Before you say anything, they're all really small and on sale.
07:28It only adds up to one big purchase.
07:30That's it.
07:31You're cut off.
07:32You made me a promise.
07:33No.
07:34I promised I'd only buy one thing from that sale.
07:37I didn't say anything about the other stores.
07:40Hand it over.
07:43It's for your own good, Caitlyn.
07:51There.
07:51That should hold you.
07:56I'm worried about Caitlyn.
07:58Me too.
07:59It's time for an intervention.
08:01For what?
08:01For shopping.
08:02She's out of control with her credit card again.
08:05Um.
08:06No can do.
08:07We'd have to hand in our guy badges if we did that.
08:10What are guy badges?
08:11Can't tell you.
08:12You're not a guy.
08:13Gee, it's such a drag.
08:14We don't get to be guys.
08:16Ah.
08:18Wyatt, can you cover for me at Underground?
08:21Star and I have a sushi rendezvous.
08:23Sure.
08:24Anything for the lovebirds.
08:26Catch you guys later.
08:28You'd better watch your hours hanging with Star.
08:30You just might lose your guy badge.
08:32Whoa.
08:35Thanks for such a rocking evening, Princess.
08:39I sure had fun.
08:40Me too, noble peasant boy of difficult circumstances that are like totally not his fault.
08:47Princess, that ruffian bluefish from wrong side of Rheed is not good enough for you.
08:53It's your stepfather, the evil emperor.
08:58No, I am a benevolent emperor that agreed on here.
09:03Okay, you buy the lemonades and we'll listen to the intervention plan.
09:07What the?
09:08What's wrong with this picture?
09:11Whoa.
09:12Why are people who are not us sitting at our table?
09:16Caitlin always saved our table.
09:18I can't believe this.
09:19Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
09:22Hi.
09:23I think there's been some kind of mistake.
09:26This is our table?
09:27Really?
09:28Because I don't see your name on it.
09:30Mine is.
09:30I carved it with a plastic spoon.
09:33It took weeks.
09:34How sad.
09:35We're still not moving.
09:36But I can fix this boo-boo for your little friend.
09:41There.
09:42Now it says Trisha.
09:43All fixed.
09:44Hey, that's public property.
09:47Everyone sign their name just until I can get nameplates made.
09:50Print it, Josh.
09:52I'm not sure these losers can read cursive.
09:58Same deal, Wendell.
10:03Nice and big, okay, Vicky?
10:10And any way you want, Smithy.
10:14There.
10:15All done.
10:16Bye-bye.
10:18Look, you are leaving and that...
10:19Stop annoying my customers or I'll call mall security.
10:24You don't need to do that.
10:25This is our table now.
10:27Pick another one or leave.
10:28Let's just take another table.
10:32Nice hat.
10:33Uh...
10:34Ha-ha-ha.
10:48Can I help you, miss?
10:51Oh, yes.
10:52What if your employee's is keeping my credit card?
10:54Uh, warm.
10:55For me.
10:56In here.
10:56And now I need it.
10:58She said she'd be right back, but I've been waiting and waiting.
11:01I apologize on behalf of that soon-to-be ex-employee.
11:06Here you go.
11:07Thanks.
11:08Oh, I'm sure she just forgot.
11:10Please say thanks for me.
11:11Oh, you can thank me yourself.
11:14Hand it over.
11:24Ow!
11:25Ow!
11:26Let go!
11:27It, Lynn!
11:28I own it!
11:29No!
11:29It owns you!
11:31Ha!
11:31No way!
11:32Ow!
11:34That's an illegal hold, Masterson.
11:36No hair pulling.
11:38Ow!
11:39Ow!
11:40Nice maneuver!
11:41Ow, Lynn!
11:42Ow!
11:43One, two, three, pin, win it!
11:46Nice!
11:47Yes!
11:51Ten-minute penalty for wrestling with a customer, plus two minutes for losing.
12:04This sucks!
12:06What, the music or the fact that we had to get crappy drinks from That's Just Grape?
12:10Take your pick.
12:21The thing is, that we are trying to help Caitlyn help herself, and...
12:26Ow!
12:26Beat it, you little creeper!
12:28Section 443.
12:30No loitering or terrorizing children.
12:33Now!
12:37Caitlyn has to be told, first and foremost, that we care about her.
12:40Sorry to interrupt.
12:41Everyone comfy?
12:42You bet.
12:43I'm good.
12:44Well, I could use a pillow.
12:45Yeah?
12:46Would you like the same one I'm gonna suffocate Wyatt and Jude with when I fire them?
12:52Ow!
12:59Ah!
13:00I can't think here with all that racket!
13:02I'm gonna drown it out!
13:23I can't think here with all that racket!
13:26I can't think here with all that racket!
13:26I can't think here with all that racket!
13:26I can't think here with all that racket!
13:26I can't think here with all that racket!
13:43Okay, that was humiliating.
13:46These people have got to go.
13:54Where have you been, Jude?
13:56You missed like 12 hot chicks?
13:58Not interested, bro.
13:59Oh, what?
14:00So you think Star's the one now?
14:02Could be.
14:03Don't let her get to you, man.
14:04It only ends in pain.
14:06Trust me.
14:09There's more than one fish in the sea, you know.
14:12You have no idea what you're missing out on.
14:24Okay, that skirt is adorable.
14:26Oh, I know, right?
14:28Caitlin.
14:29Hi.
14:30Oh, hi, Nikki.
14:33A credit card?
14:35Wasn't this rejected the last time you tried to use it here?
14:38Oh, it's fine now.
14:40There's lots of room on it.
14:44So, we missed you at break time.
14:46Where were you?
14:47Oh, we had a few hardcore sales we just couldn't miss.
14:50Right, Kate?
14:51Shut it, shoppy.
14:52I was talking to her.
14:54I'm out of here.
14:55Later, Kate.
14:56Congrats.
14:57This card is clean.
14:59I'll take that.
15:00Hey.
15:02Go.
15:03Shoot.
15:08What are you doing?
15:10Reversing the charge.
15:11What?
15:11Why?
15:12Because you're returning the skirt.
15:13No, I'm not.
15:14It's the last one.
15:15Come on.
15:16We're taking a walk.
15:17Can I have my card back now?
15:19No.
15:21What's going on?
15:23What is this?
15:26Uh, dude.
15:27Can't you see we're having an intervention here?
15:29An intervention?
15:31Caitlin, your shopping is out of control.
15:35We're all worried about you.
15:36Come on, guys.
15:37I'm fine.
15:37And guess who little miss I'm fine was shopping with at the khaki barn?
15:42Trisha.
15:43Caitlin, what were you thinking?
15:45Yeah, she's like your sworn enemy.
15:48I don't know how it happened, okay?
15:49It all became a big blur after Trish got me that Albatross and Finch staff discount.
15:54Yeah, and now that chick and her crew have hijacked our lemon.
15:57She what?
15:58They autographed the table and everything.
16:01Excuse me?
16:02In a minute.
16:03Oh, I can't believe this.
16:05Believe it, sister.
16:06She never even mentioned it.
16:08Wow.
16:09I had no idea my shopping affected so many people.
16:13But nobody pushes my tribe around and gets away with it.
16:16Let's go toss her out.
16:18We've tried.
16:20I've got a plan.
16:22How many minutes do you think you have left before you get fired?
16:24Well, I haven't exactly been throwing myself into this gig.
16:27I'd say maybe 25?
16:29Am I ever going to get served?
16:32Make that 15.
16:33Great.
16:34Stand by.
16:39Katie, you don't really like wearing that lemon hat, do you?
16:42Why do you ask?
16:43Because I can score you a job with a chair, a booth, and a raise.
16:49And no hat?
16:51Totally hatless.
16:53I'm so there.
16:56Hello.
16:58Katie's on her way, Jonesy.
17:04Nice.
17:05All right.
17:06All right.
17:06So, Caitlin.
17:07Ew.
17:07What's with the hat?
17:09Your daddy cancel your cards again?
17:11No.
17:12I'm canceling them myself.
17:13I have some real friends who noticed I was out of control.
17:16Oh.
17:17Lucky you.
17:18You and I are so over as friends.
17:20I am in charge of the squeeze again, and you are going to have to move your butt.
17:24And your friends' butts.
17:25We aren't going anywhere.
17:27Oh, but I think you are.
17:29Unless you want me to sit and stare at you all for the rest of your supposedly natural life.
17:35Oh, yeah?
17:35You think you can out-vacant stare at us?
17:38You're on.
17:40Josh?
17:44Trust me, dude.
17:46I can stare into space for a long, long time.
17:50You are so going down, bored boy.
17:53Whatever.
17:55Ooh.
17:56Whoever blinks first, bamoozes.
17:59Deal?
18:00Deal?
18:00Get him, Josh.
18:15Oh, yes.
18:17Come on.
18:21Ew.
18:27He blinked.
18:28Now get out.
18:29He did not.
18:32He did now.
18:34Cheater.
18:35Oh, no.
18:36Oh, no.
18:37Oh, no.
18:38Oh, no.
18:38Oh, no.
18:40All right.
18:42That is some arm you've got there.
18:44I wish Star was here to see that.
18:47She loves a good fruit beaning.
18:49Where is she?
18:50I broke up with her.
18:51What?
18:52Why did you do that?
18:53Because you told me to.
18:55Jonesy?
18:56What?
18:56No, I didn't.
18:57You told me she would repaint my board, chain me up, humiliate me, and break my heart.
19:03I was kidding, Jude.
19:04Don't you care about Star?
19:06Oh, yeah.
19:06She's like the rockinest chick I ever met.
19:09Star is amazing.
19:10You're one of the luckiest guys around, Jude.
19:12Don't you get that?
19:15I do now, dude.
19:17Later.
19:18Where are you going?
19:19I bet I know where.
19:26I suppose it is better to have loved a bluefish than not to have loved a fish at all.
19:35I know there are a lot of finfellas in the ocean, Princess, but I only have bulgy eyes for you.
19:41Can you find it in your scaly heart to forgive a jerkfish like me?
19:52I love a happy ending.
19:56I love a happy ending.
20:03Five welcome back lemon whips on the house.
20:11What's this?
20:12Oh, sorry.
20:13I must have left a credit card shard in the blender.
20:17I finally destroyed Daddy's card.
20:19Way to go, Caitlyn.
20:20So, what did you do with it all?
20:23I took most of it back, and when I couldn't, I donated to charity.
20:26Nice work, kiddo.
20:27Yeah.
20:28Turns out I'm pretty good at shopping in reverse, too.
20:30To Caitlyn.
20:32To Caitlyn.
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