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Taskmaster - S15E07 - Schrödinger's Egg [Full Movie] [Recommended]Full EP - Full
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00:02Brace! Brace!
00:03I'm bracing!
00:12No, no, no, no, no!
00:18No!
00:23Ah!
00:25What?
00:31APPLAUSE
00:36Hello, everybody, and welcome to Taskmaster.
00:40The road to Taskmaster victory is long.
00:42There are many hurdles, physically and psychologically.
00:44Different individuals respond in different ways,
00:47and sometimes on camera there are those that seem not to care
00:50at all how well they do.
00:51But do not be fooled.
00:53One of them came to my dressing room last night,
00:55hot tears streaming down their face.
00:57I want this more than I've ever wanted anything before.
01:01I want to make my family proud.
01:03Please, Greg.
01:04Please don't take this from me, please.
01:06Now, I would never reveal that person's identity,
01:09but I'll say this.
01:10Chin up!
01:11You're doing fine.
01:12And don't be silly.
01:13Of course you'll be able to show your face in Scotland again.
01:15LAUGHTER
01:19Let's meet them all now.
01:21Please give it an enormous round of applause to Frankie Bale!
01:24CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
01:25I know Graham.
01:27Jenny O'Klaan.
01:29Bael Smith-Baino.
01:31And Mae Martin.
01:34And next to me, a man who smells his own farts
01:37using what he describes as his guff and cup system.
01:40LAUGHTER
01:42It's...
01:42Eddie Clarence Hall!
01:48Hello.
01:49Hello.
01:50Hello.
01:51Hello.
01:51Good evening.
01:52How are you?
01:52I am great.
01:55Wow.
01:55For once.
01:56And I want to take an opportunity, if you wouldn't mind,
01:59an opportunity to thank this man,
02:01because, er, you get a lot of stick from people
02:04for being mean to me.
02:06I thought you were very nice.
02:07Four months ago, Greg gave me a watch.
02:09He said,
02:09I want to give you this,
02:10and he gave me that,
02:11and I...
02:12It's really nice.
02:14So...
02:14I mean, I don't know how to do it.
02:16APPLAUSE
02:16This is just true.
02:17Nice guy.
02:18I haven't got you anything,
02:18but you may do what you may...
02:21with me.
02:23LAUGHTER
02:24Pay back for my lovely present.
02:26LAUGHTER
02:28Put your tongue out.
02:30LAUGHTER
02:31What do I do?
02:33LAUGHTER
02:33OK.
02:42APPLAUSE
02:52C'mon, home.
02:53Yes, Greg, it's prized half-time,
02:54and this week the category is
02:55The Most Brilliant Thing That Pops Up.
02:58You'll give five points to the top of the pops,
03:01and then one of them will be really happy at the end of the show
03:02when they win five brilliant things that pop up.
03:05Back to you, Pops.
03:06Right, obviously, anyone who's brought a toaster in,
03:09get ready for no points.
03:11LAUGHTER
03:12Ivo, hello.
03:13Hello, Greg.
03:14What's the most brilliant thing that you've brought in that pops up?
03:17It's, of course, the game of whack-a-mole
03:19with a bespoke Taskmaster twist.
03:21Here it is.
03:23He's done this.
03:24There we are!
03:26LAUGHTER
03:28Oh, God.
03:28Oh, God, I like it more than I ever imagined I would.
03:33Yes.
03:34Not too proud not to put myself in the whack-a-mole.
03:37I suffer as we all shall at the hands of the bat.
03:41LAUGHTER
03:42Well, it's nice.
03:44You made the effort to make it Taskmaster-centric, and I enjoy that.
03:47It feels mid-range at this stage.
03:50The Japanese format of whack-a-mole,
03:52magura tataki, mole smash, is popular worldwide.
03:56And now it's got our faces on it.
03:58LAUGHTER
03:59Five points, please.
04:01LAUGHTER
04:03APPLAUSE
04:06Do you want me to enter five points?
04:08I do not.
04:09LAUGHTER
04:10Hello, May.
04:11You remember what you said about toasters?
04:13LAUGHTER
04:14But, bear with me.
04:16OK, I've brought a Pop-Tart, but no, wait.
04:21Yeah, this is May's most brilliant thing that pops up.
04:23On the Pop-Tart is the most brilliant mind of our time.
04:28LAUGHTER
04:30My man, Professor Brian Cox.
04:34Look at his hair and...
04:36OK, whack-a-mole's looking more attractive.
04:39LAUGHTER
04:39Are you a fan of Professor Brian Cox?
04:41Oh, I think he's fit, yeah.
04:44No, I respect his mind.
04:46LAUGHTER
04:47Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
04:47All you're going to see is my burning face.
04:52LAUGHTER
04:54How have you never had an impression show?
04:56LAUGHTER
04:58Jenny.
04:59Oh, no.
05:00You must be feeling a little bit encouraged by Professor Brian Pop-Tart.
05:05No.
05:05Do you like David Bowie?
05:06Do I?
05:07Yeah.
05:07I don't mind him.
05:09Right, David Bowie would never have had those big balloon trousers
05:12had it not been for this bloke called Oscar Schlemmer, right?
05:18And he designed the Bauhaus Ballet,
05:22so I have bought for you a Bauhaus Ballet pop-up book.
05:27Here is the book.
05:28Yeah.
05:29Here it comes.
05:30Bop!
05:31Ooh!
05:32Ooh!
05:33Did you hear that noise?
05:34The audience loved it.
05:35Craig.
05:36Come on.
05:37I don't mind it.
05:38It's interesting because the lineage from Oscar Schlemmer
05:41to Bowie is all in the Bauhaus movement.
05:45Yeah, yeah.
05:45That's why these people came here, Jenny.
05:47LAUGHTER
05:48They're gagging for Schlemmer!
05:50That's all they want!
05:51Schlemmer versus cop!
05:52Schlemmer versus cop!
05:53These people!
05:54Yeah.
05:55Kyle.
05:55The most brilliant thing that pops up is obviously oneself.
06:00And what better thing to pop up on than a pogo stick?
06:03Oh.
06:04Ooh!
06:05We found our level.
06:07LAUGHTER
06:08Yes.
06:09And it was popped in this pogo stick.
06:13LAUGHTER
06:15I had a bit of fun.
06:16APPLAUSE
06:19My parents genuinely got me a pogo stick for Christmas.
06:22I'm 35 years old.
06:23I was like, oh, what should I do with it?
06:25And they were like, bounce around with your friends.
06:29They were like...
06:32You might avoid being bottomed because I used to have a pogo stick
06:34and I quite liked it and that's the only reason.
06:36I really like the image of you on a pogo stick.
06:38LAUGHTER
06:39That was quite good.
06:41Got into a nasty accident with Mark.
06:43Landed on his foot.
06:44Poor lad.
06:45Was he one of your students?
06:47LAUGHTER
06:49APPLAUSE
06:51Hi, Frankie.
06:52You must be feeling pretty confident here.
06:54I...
06:55I've brought something that pops up regularly in my house.
06:58I've tried to throw it out of my house, I think on three occasions,
07:02and it always returns.
07:03I've ended up just hanging it on the wall in my living room.
07:06And it is this very sinister painting.
07:09Here it is.
07:11LAUGHTER
07:13LAUGHTER
07:14It is awful.
07:15But I sort of love it.
07:16Who's putting it up?
07:18The children deny.
07:20LAUGHTER
07:20But they're not trustworthy.
07:22What is the least brilliant thing that pops up, Greg?
07:25Well, what do you think?
07:26I feel like it might be the Pop-Tart.
07:27Yeah, it is.
07:28Oh.
07:29It's just annoyed me. It's out.
07:30One point.
07:31One point to May.
07:31Pogo stick, two points.
07:33Oh!
07:33Book, lazy, three points.
07:36Unbelievably, a whack-a-mole that he...
07:38Got some faces out.
07:40I don't know why it's got four points, May.
07:41You're right.
07:42It's inconsistent.
07:43That's fine.
07:44Fordriver.
07:45And that painting doesn't deserve any praise,
07:47but, weirdly, it's getting five points.
07:49One, two, three, four, five points.
07:51So, thank you.
07:52APPLAUSE
07:56Well, more like, let's get pulping.
07:59MUSIC
08:12Hello, Alex.
08:13Hi, Jenny.
08:13Please stand on the little circle.
08:15OK.
08:16What do you think this is?
08:18Prime pan.
08:19A Victorian satellite.
08:21I think this is, like, a World War II bomb.
08:24Be careful.
08:24I'll put the safety gloves on.
08:26Of course, if it's a bomb.
08:27Yeah.
08:27Yeah, yeah.
08:28OK.
08:29Rotate the pulper wheel without pulping the egg.
08:32You must not move from this spot at any point.
08:35If you pulp the egg, you are disqualified.
08:37Most rotations wins.
08:39You have a maximum of ten minutes.
08:42Pulp a wheel, obviously.
08:45Then what's a pulper?
08:46I see no egg.
08:47This is a pulper.
08:49Right.
08:50And the egg's in it.
08:51Where?
08:52Wait, hang on.
08:53What's a pulper?
08:54Obviously, it's very tempting to go, ha-ha.
08:57He's lived his whole life in cotton wool.
08:58He's never used a pulper wheel.
09:00But even much more practical contestants than me,
09:05this is their first time doing this, I think.
09:09Can I say I don't know what a pulper is?
09:11Have you said your time starts now yet?
09:13No.
09:14I wouldn't dream of it.
09:16You're going to have to say your time starts now.
09:19Your time starts now.
09:21APPLAUSE
09:25Over this series, we're building up a very clear picture
09:27of what you were like as a child.
09:30Yes!
09:32I've met that boy so many times.
09:34No, no, no.
09:36Let's start?
09:36Yes, let's start.
09:37We purchased the pulper and this is what's going to happen.
09:39First up, we're going to see Kael and Frankie
09:42starring in a little film I've called Pulp Friction.
09:45The egg, you said, is what, inside?
09:48In the mouth of the pulper?
09:49Where's that?
09:50I can't tell you any more.
09:52But I want to see it.
09:53You can't see it.
09:54How do I know it's there?
09:55You have to take my word for it.
09:57Try that before.
09:58So it's just a kind of blind Schrodinger's egg.
10:02Exactly.
10:03This?
10:04The pulper machine...
10:05Yes.
10:06...presses the cherries across an iron faceplate.
10:08It might be a different one.
10:09The pulper drives the impeller to rotate through the motor
10:12and the slurry in the tank is sucked out.
10:15What?
10:16Oh, I hear the egg.
10:23It's a quarter of ten.
10:25Do you reckon that was the egg?
10:27Does it sound like an egg?
10:28Mm.
10:29Or a calculator.
10:47I mean, it can't be pulped if it's making that much noise.
10:51I mean, that's another way of looking at it.
11:04I don't think that was the egg.
11:06No, that's half a rotation.
11:08I wonder if it goes faster.
11:10It's less likely to break.
11:18Yeah, I think the lack of speed is a problem.
11:22Oh, yeah.
11:34I know what that was.
11:36Plastic chair.
11:37Plastic chair.
11:38OK.
11:38All right.
11:39All right.
11:44All right.
11:45We're on eight and a half rotations.
11:48Stopping there?
11:48Yeah.
11:49I think that's pretty good.
11:52Nothing there.
11:55Two.
12:00It's gone.
12:01You stopping there?
12:02Yeah, it's gone.
12:03Two and three quarters rotations.
12:05APPLAUSE
12:08This is the first time they've seen the interior of the pulper.
12:11Yeah.
12:11So they were blind, obviously, and the more you spun it, the higher the egg got towards danger.
12:17That's how it worked.
12:18Oh.
12:19Eight and a half turns, then, is quite an impressive bit of pre-pulp spinning.
12:24Brinkmanship.
12:25The egg survived for both of them.
12:26We've got a score of eight and a half versus two and three quarters, but they're both still
12:30in play.
12:30I put it to you, Kael, that throughout the task, and indeed when you left, you didn't
12:34know what was going on.
12:36LAUGHTER
12:37I still don't know what a pulper is.
12:39LAUGHTER
12:39We want to show more?
12:40Yeah.
12:41OK, next up to the pulper are Jenny and May.
12:46Right, so the egg is in the machine.
12:48Oh, yeah.
12:49I'm going to go very gently.
12:58That's the egg.
13:00I haven't even done a single rotation yet, have I?
13:03No.
13:04Oh, fuck it!
13:06Pulp the egg!
13:07It's more under pulpit!
13:08Pulp the stupid egg!
13:10Yeah!
13:11Get the egg pulped!
13:12I'm not going to win anyway!
13:15There's no way that egg is not pulped.
13:18That's one rotation.
13:23You've still got nine minutes.
13:26What?
13:27I can't keep this up for another nine.
13:30In the olden days, is this what the pulpers did?
13:32Pulpers would come home to their wives.
13:34The wives would be like, did you pulp the egg?
13:37And they would be like, I did eight rotations.
13:43Yes, I want ten.
13:44You want ten?
13:45OK, ten rotations.
13:50It's smashed, isn't it?
13:52The egg smashed.
13:52It's 11.
13:54I think an egg could survive this.
14:04It's not the egg.
14:0613.
14:07OK.
14:09Yeah?
14:09Yeah.
14:10Thanks, Jenny.
14:12How long?
14:13You've got just 30 seconds.
14:17I would just poke myself if I hadn't halved it and I stopped turning.
14:36I'm intrigued by the characters that you created during that.
14:39That's Mr and Mrs Eggpulper.
14:40Yeah.
14:41Yeah, yeah, yeah.
14:42Where are they from, that couple?
14:43Wherever Nancy from Oliver Twist is from.
14:46They're all, yeah.
14:47How?
14:48Like that.
14:49I mean, I really enjoyed that.
14:51They did very well but also very badly, which means Kyle is still in second place.
14:55And sometimes it doesn't matter if you don't understand the task.
14:59Right, part one is about to have it on its toes.
15:02Open the back doors of the van and we'll bundle part two in shortly.
15:05Bye!
15:13APPLAUSE
15:19Oh, yes!
15:20Hello!
15:21We're back.
15:21It's the second part of the show.
15:23It was a really noisy task in motion to test the bravery of our quivering quintet.
15:27Yes, they're proactive pulpers, that's for sure.
15:30None of them knew what was happening inside the machine, but they knew they needed to keep their eggs intact
15:34at all costs.
15:35So far there have been two successful and two unsuccessful attempts, so here's Ivo Graham to upset the balance.
15:43I haven't been very good at lateral thinking tasks and I haven't been very good at egg tasks, but I'm
15:49going to find the egg.
15:55Can I move this spot?
15:57All of the information is on task.
16:00Yeah, but...
16:04GASPING
16:04BUZZER
16:05BUZZER
16:06BUZZER
16:08BUZZER
16:09BUZZER
16:13Are you now better informed?
16:15No, I wish I hadn't seen all this for you.
16:18BUZZER
16:18BUZZER
16:19BUZZER
16:20Ooh!
16:21BUZZER
16:23BUZZER
16:23BUZZER
16:29BUZZER
16:42You got three minutes left 30 30 31 33
16:5310 seconds last pulp
17:06I felt some weird level of pride watching the Ivo frog bounce his way round I think there was
17:14immense dignity watching my body spasm with a glove bag in my mouth
17:20so it wasn't cheating it just had to stay on the spot at all times
17:27well he clearly rotated it more than anyone else 56 times congratulations so Jenny and
17:36May don't get any points apologies three points to KL four to Frankie but of
17:40course five to Ivo Graham okay it means that those two Frankie and Ivo are in
17:48the joint leading spots nine points each I do too Greg it feels so right so here's a
18:00pretty sweet one just for you
18:17thank you hello oh my goodness this has gone a bit S&M-y oh okay hello it's you first
18:31me mm-hmm
18:36do we have a safe word you've done this before yeah I'm really at home great
18:41okay well I've been arrested obviously but I haven't done sex games with these
18:47a couple more things jelly babies jelly babies yeah they're numbered one two three four five
19:02completely free yourselves and have a team hug fastest team hug wins your time starts now okay so
19:12so there's a one on here and is there another number on this one this is two
19:17hmm
19:23well Jenny Claire's the chirpiest S&M-er I've ever met
19:27fun listen let's focus on the task okay right I'm looking forward to seeing them free themselves okay let's
19:33see the handcuffed threesome of may Jenny and Kyle there's a key here Kyle can you reach the key let's
19:40try
19:45come on that's definitely impossible first thing for a minute I'm gonna count my I've got 15 in here one
19:54hey what's that menu okay so these are different flavored jelly babies okay well I'm gonna bite the head off
20:00one see if I've got a flavor four oh Jesus Christ that's the most disgusting thing I've ever eaten in
20:05my life I think it might be chicken feet
20:14what wait but what is the because you want to or is there a time time this is a five
20:19-digit code and
20:20there's five glasses but then what does it prove we're gonna have to figure out what flavor all these
20:25are and then we're gonna have to use those those aren't numbers but that will correspond with a periodic
20:30table somehow before I buy anything I need to know oh yeah yeah very bad very bad wasabi okay wait
20:40but what do you mean okay like okay that's gonna correspond with that like maybe the initials of it
20:46what's W 74 oh that's mint and gravy I'm going to mint it's mint and gravy so you had wasabi
20:57I think I was sick when the gravy is mg which is magnesium and what number 12 okay so you
21:05think that I
21:06should have 12 and then go to the yes so one two seven four seven four okay number three is
21:14green
21:19you can do it hold on may if I do it one by one it's gonna give us a clue
21:27to what it
21:27might be oh that's some really clever what was it zero okay okay so what starts with the zero so
21:37it
21:37could be bacon and kale it could be broccoli it was is that the green one could it be broccoli
21:41that's a big zero five so we start with five on the next log we're on two okay it's very
21:49really weird
21:51this is definitely pepper and beaver oh that's definitely beaten lead 82 and then the next one was
22:21is it fair to say that Jenny and May were the most active members of this committee what I will
22:27say is that
22:28that has been edited very very nicely in my favor because I was a monster I'm so glad they cut
22:38it
22:38out because it was really tense I I wasn't putting fucking broccoli jelly babies in my mouth I mean that
22:45much quickly became apparent it was a very difficult task they took the same amount of time you could
22:51listen to all that I want as another baby five times 17 minutes 50 okay time for a break just
22:59time
22:59for those couples watching who let the family dog sleep in the same bed as them to reflect on the
23:04day
23:04you threw the towel in on your love life
23:06bye
23:17hello and a warm welcome back to part three tell me stuff Alex sure Greg well jelly babies the periodic
23:24table
23:25handcuffs and the ultimate goal of a hug that's a typical day for me coincidentally they're also the
23:30main ingredients of the current team task but how quickly will the intelligent team of Frankie and
23:34Ivo work out the conundrum release themselves from the cuffs and embrace victorious let's find out
23:40right right both of a five sure okay that's quite unpleasant isn't it green yeah it might be broccoli in
23:52fine it is broccoli I think okay number four is hot I think oh really fucking unpleasant could be coming
24:00and radish human and radish there must be a CR so maybe if broccoli was B so if we took
24:07that as five
24:08yes yeah chromium 24 but how does that help us because that gives us two digits unless we add them
24:14together why don't we add two and four together to make sense let's see number three it doesn't have a
24:22lot
24:22of taste to it mint and gravy yeah magnesium which is and gravy so we add those two that would
24:30be three
24:30no I reckon if you just laid out the ten numbers the first five would be padlock one and the
24:36second
24:36five would be padlock two well that's complicated things I think both the padlocks will be the same
24:47pepper and beetroot maybe PB eight two would give us ten which is a two-digit number which is no
24:54use in
24:54this five-digit debacle adding those numbers together it you know it does seem a waste of you know all
25:01these two-digit elements well okay let's just try to I've got so much respect for you Frankie but I
25:08don't
25:08think it's adding the numbers together I've never thought that your system or mine oh let's go with
25:16yours man okay so one two seven four broccoli B so the last number is oh yes and now I'm
25:28so wrong
25:30uh start with a five eight two get ready to hug Frankie there's the one here comes the six
25:40uh you're not you're not completely free oh
26:00it's not fair that you should make a task feels so like it's finally finished and then it just be
26:08getting started it's right there above the periodic table not for me baby
26:24both hugs for me adorable the handcuffed hug
26:30you felt reticent to point out to Frankie that his system was incorrect well obviously there was a
26:36period where there was a very strong chance that Frankie's system might be correct it's co-pilot
26:41syndrome isn't it you know a lot of them plane crashes happen because the co-pilot is too scared
26:47to say to the the brash pilot look we're gonna cut the fucking ground here I asked Alex to isolate
27:01a
27:01picture of the co-pilot's face when he knew that he had the answer but wasn't sure he should say
27:06anything this is the face yeah let's talk about points okay the team of three
27:17took 17 minutes and 50 seconds the team of two took 42 minutes
27:28I'm getting five points looking through of course it is the team of two did achieve the task eventually
27:33yeah there's points I can't give them any more than two points for that all right five points
27:37to the team of three two to the team of two
27:42can we fit one more task in please definitely Greg and this one begins with them making some
27:47very important decisions
28:04this gold pen reminds me of school like one boy in a year would have a gold pen I'd have
28:10it by the
28:14end of the year oh write down a number between zero and a hundred a length of time between one
28:21minute and twenty minutes five ingredients a country a noun and an adjective this seems too simple you
28:30have three minutes your time starts now why does that seem so easy well and then what do I have
28:36to do
28:36with it presumably there's some trick involved number between zero and a hundred fifty eighty forty two
28:44meaning of life seventy five seven lovely lines of time between one minute and twenty minutes two
28:51minutes fifteen minutes nineteen minutes four minutes twenty seconds also meaning of life 21 seconds
29:06one minute and twenty one seconds five ingredients these ingredients are gonna bounce back and hit me in the face
29:14chili cherries sausage ketchup bun mustard grilled onions you know what that means
29:19I don't know hot dog basil cumin garlic salt and cannellini beans the country it's got in France
29:35Guatemala and the art Germany place to live there now duck duck shoe dog bench large splendid
29:48I see I see 12 seconds oh cowering gold this is a trick
29:56oh
29:58see you later
29:59all right
30:00oh
30:01oh
30:01oh
30:03oh
30:04oh
30:05oh
30:06oh
30:07oh
30:08oh
30:08oh
30:09oh
30:09oh
30:09oh
30:10oh
30:13oh
30:14yeah the adjectives are more interesting than the nouns duck duck shoe dog bench
30:19what have they gone for the two of them went for duck the first noun that came to me
30:23yeah there were a lot of ducks around the house so that may have been something to do
30:26with it yes there were like like no not real done no no they're not real
30:31should we start with the double duckers double duckers yes well they both chose duck as their go-to
30:36two nouns, so let's see Ivo and May together.
30:40Hello. Hi.
30:42If it isn't, my dream five ingredients...
30:46LAUGHTER
30:47Make a splendid Guatemalan duck.
30:49Make a feisty French duck.
30:51You must use all these ingredients and you must also clap 80 times.
30:55And you must also clap 42 times.
30:57You have four minutes and 20 seconds.
30:59You have 19 minutes. Your time starts now.
31:04APPLAUSE
31:07I could have picked any noun and I picked duck, which is a food.
31:118, 9, 80.
31:13That would be good news if any of this was... duck.
31:20Oh, good. Does it? Yeah, sweet corn.
31:23Sure, I saw duck.
31:25What I need is to make a mould of a duck.
31:29Christ, the time!
31:30LAUGHTER
31:31What's a duck?
31:34Good.
31:35Really good.
31:37No, no, not so good.
31:39Why didn't I just ask for more time and I designed my own task?
31:44LAUGHTER
31:44Oh, it's burning. It's burning.
31:46French duck.
31:48Oh!
31:50LAUGHTER
31:54So, what else is...
31:56I think this is all about confidence.
32:00LAUGHTER
32:06I think I've just got to do...
32:15Good evening.
32:16Good evening.
32:16Good evening, mate.
32:17I've made for you a splendid Guatemalan duck.
32:23Bonjour, Alex.
32:25Don't do what I go.
32:28I've been busy.
32:30Too late to pop a little berry on?
32:33LAUGHTER
32:35Do you see the beak?
32:37Do I see the wings?
32:38They were removed.
32:40It's Guatemalan because of the sauce, is it?
32:42And corn comes from Central America.
32:44Mm-hm.
32:45Splendid.
32:48Why is he French?
32:49Well, the garlic is obviously doing some pretty heavy lifting.
32:52It's too heavy to hang around the neck, unfortunately.
32:55He's got a beret on, but I did forget to do all my claps.
32:59Yeah, it's good.
33:00Really?
33:00Yeah.
33:01I like that.
33:04APPLAUSE
33:07May I put it to you that your duck mould was no more useful
33:11than just chucking two parts of sweet corn onto a plate?
33:13LAUGHTER
33:14Yeah.
33:15Did you think the end result was splendid?
33:17Actually, Alex, like, went back for a second bite.
33:20Like, it was not that bad, was it?
33:22He'll eat anything, though.
33:23All of that is true.
33:25You won't eat anything, will you, Alex?
33:26Didn't see you sort of tucking into my...
33:29LAUGHTER
33:29All I could do, surely, was lick your duck.
33:32LAUGHTER
33:33Niftily moving that spot around the pulper feels a long time ago now.
33:38LAUGHTER
33:38It does make me feel quite sorry for you sometimes
33:41when you grip your head.
33:43LAUGHTER
33:44Like a chimpanzee whose habitat is under threat.
33:48LAUGHTER
33:50Oh, dear.
33:51Right, there's just one part left.
33:53And in it, someone will win today's competition and scream,
33:56YES!
33:56At last, I've won a Professor Brian Cox Pop-Tart
33:59and a pogo stick!
34:01Whoo!
34:02APPLAUSE
34:12Hello again!
34:14Welcome back to the final instalment of today's show.
34:17Alex, can you please sum up your break for me in one word?
34:19Plop.
34:20LAUGHTER
34:21Rather than go into detail, let's get the current task finished.
34:24The comics wrote down some numbers, some ingredients, a country,
34:26a noun and an adjective, all to give them the chance
34:29to make the next part of the task nice and easy for them.
34:32Here's Frankie making a dog, Jenny making a shoe
34:34and Kael making a bench.
34:36LAUGHTER
34:38So, these are the things I mentioned earlier.
34:39It was a trick.
34:42Make a large Scottish dog.
34:44Make a cowering Kenyan bench.
34:47Make a gold German shoe.
34:48You must use all these ingredients.
34:51And you must also clap seven times.
34:5350 times.
34:5475 times.
34:56You have 15 minutes.
34:57Most accurate creation wins.
35:00One minute and 21 seconds.
35:03Two minutes?
35:05Yeah, that's what you wanted.
35:11Oh, God!
35:14The time starts now.
35:18You've got just over a minute left.
35:19Oh, what?
35:21I'm going to cook that fucking potato,
35:23cos this is going to be edible.
35:25We've got an eye.
35:26Oh, man.
35:30There is a gold shoe outside.
35:33Mein Geldschuh!
35:35Bitter!
35:36Jawohl!
35:38I was hoping that would look like a tail,
35:39but it just looks like it's shat everywhere.
35:42You've got 30 seconds.
35:45It goes in there like that.
35:50BIRDS
35:50BIRDS
35:51BIRDS
35:52BIRDS
35:52BIRDS
35:53BIRDS
35:54BIRDS
35:55BIRDS
35:56Hi, Frankie.
35:57Hey.
35:58What have you made me?
35:59Made you?
36:00A large Scottish dog.
36:01Look, there's the St Andrew's flag there.
36:04Oh, to show that it's Scottish?
36:05Yeah, but what's showing that it's a dog?
36:07BIRDS
36:08BIRDS
36:09BIRDS
36:10That's dinner?
36:12It's here.
36:13It's a slightly undercooked chicken carne.
36:16Oh.
36:17I'd eat with caution and milk.
36:19I normally do.
36:21It's a cowering Kenyan bench.
36:25Please, can you show me the Kenyan aspect?
36:27It's difficult to see with the human eye.
36:30But on every part of those grilled onions, it says Nairobi.
36:35Oh.
36:36I'm cowering.
36:37It's hiding from this.
36:39It's not, it's not really a sort of eating situation, is it?
36:48Very nice.
36:49Is it?
36:49This might be my perfect meal.
36:55Taste of Africa?
36:57It's delicious.
37:03Well, I suppose the obvious question is to Frankie, and it's, um,
37:07have you ever seen a dog before?
37:09The big red eyes of a Scottish dog.
37:12The singular big red eye of the flowery Scottish dog.
37:17In what way is chilli con carne stuck in the shoe German?
37:21Other than you kept speaking like a cast member of Hello, Hello, of course.
37:26I just was trying my best.
37:29I know that you're going to tell me something that's so awful.
37:32I don't think I clapped.
37:34I don't think I fucking clapped.
37:36I don't think I clapped.
37:38Did I clap?
37:39I didn't clap.
37:40Jenny, not only did you not clap, you finished with one minute to go
37:43and sat down.
37:45APPLAUSE
37:48Kyle, I have to say, it was pretty impressive that he managed
37:52to create that, and I did understand the imagery as well.
37:56I mean, I maybe questioned whether he'd had time to engrave
38:01Nairobi onto the onions.
38:03It's hard to see.
38:05I genuinely was quite impressed.
38:06Was Jenny's chilli nice?
38:08The task wasn't really about whether it tasted nice.
38:11I didn't have to eat them.
38:11I was just making conversation, you bellend.
38:14LAUGHTER
38:16Go on, let's get on, if you like.
38:18Here are all five.
38:20Pay close attention to Frankie's top left.
38:23Also, he didn't clap, so it's not that relevant.
38:26Well, they're all so wonderful I feel a bit mean giving zero.
38:30I would give the people who didn't clap one charity point.
38:34So, the top row, Frankie, Ivo and Jenny all one point.
38:36And the other two, and I'm sure I'll be judged very harshly for this,
38:40but I am more impressed by the bench.
38:42I am.
38:43It took only a minute.
38:44All right.
38:44Kael gets five points.
38:47I need a scoreboard update, please.
38:49In this episode, Greg, two people who've not won a show yet could do.
38:53Kael's in the lead on 15.
38:54Frankie's in joint second on 12.
39:06CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
39:14Hello, young man.
39:16My tongue is still sore.
39:18Who will read the task out?
39:20May Martin, please.
39:22Say the word given to you by the taskmaster
39:24in the accent on the card you choose.
39:27The taskmaster will guess what accent you're doing.
39:30Highest score after three rounds wins.
39:33I hope Brian Cox is one of the options.
39:36LAUGHTER
39:36Are you ready for the first word?
39:37Yes, they've all been given a country.
39:39We're going to start with May and go from right to left.
39:41What's the first word, Greg?
39:43Taskmaster.
39:46Taskmaster.
39:50Where is May from?
39:52Scotland.
39:53Let's see on the card.
39:56Oh!
39:58My whole family are from Wales, May.
40:02Next up, it's Kael's.
40:04Kael, good luck.
40:05Tis, mister.
40:06Australia.
40:11South Africa.
40:14What's the country, Kael?
40:15New Zealand.
40:17Oh!
40:19Jenny's turn.
40:21Taskmaster.
40:24Norwegian.
40:26Sweden.
40:27It's so close.
40:29Very close.
40:29It is so close.
40:30Aye, votes 10.
40:32Taskmaster?
40:34LAUGHTER
40:36Is Disney a country?
40:38LAUGHTER
40:40APPLAUSE
40:42Generic American in America?
40:44Sorry, May.
40:46Canada.
40:47Oh, close.
40:48Sort of is generic America, isn't it?
40:51No.
40:56Frankie, you all right?
40:57Could get the first point in round one.
40:59Taskmaster!
41:02He's from Ireland.
41:04I vote.
41:06Mr Gregory Daniel Davis.
41:09I think that's Ivo trying to sound like a street-tough New Yorker.
41:13I'm sticking with it, New York.
41:15I'm always trying to be street-tough.
41:17It's New York!
41:18CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:20Frankie.
41:22Mr Gregory Daniel Davis.
41:25LAUGHTER
41:26Absolutely easy.
41:28Belfast.
41:29Easy impressionals.
41:32CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:33Man of a thousand voices.
41:36Two voices.
41:38LAUGHTER
41:39So, round three's a little different.
41:41This time, it's walking.
41:43On these cards, we've got all your names and our names.
41:47They are in there several times, so you might have the same ones twice.
41:51Grace is going to try to spot the person by the walk.
41:53May's going to start, right? Yes.
41:54OK.
41:55Good luck.
41:57LAUGHTER
42:03APPLAUSE
42:07Whilst I personally don't think this is accurate.
42:11Jamie Ickber.
42:12Are we correct?
42:13Yeah.
42:14CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
42:24Well, I can assume it's a repeat.
42:26It is possible that it's a repeat.
42:28OK.
42:28I'll roll the dice.
42:29That was poor Jenny again.
42:31LAUGHTER
42:32She's become poor Jenny.
42:33He's correct.
42:35APPLAUSE
42:35You know, when laughing tears are really, really...
42:38LAUGHTER
42:40LAUGHTER
42:40Good luck.
42:41I'd love it if it's you.
42:43LAUGHTER
42:46LAUGHTER
42:48LAUGHTER
42:48LAUGHTER
42:50LAUGHTER
42:50LAUGHTER
42:51LAUGHTER
42:52LAUGHTER
42:52LAUGHTER
42:52LAUGHTER
42:59I know that subservient gait.
43:02LAUGHTER
43:03Alex Horne.
43:04Yes, it was Alex Horne.
43:07CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
43:08Johnny's off the mark.
43:09Now, aye vote.
43:13LAUGHTER
43:17APPLAUSE
43:21It was the, in my opinion, very graceful...
43:25LAUGHTER
43:25LAUGHTER
43:26...Jenny Eclare.
43:27When does this cross into bullying?
43:30LAUGHTER
43:30I've already lost the episode.
43:32I just wanted to have a go at it.
43:34LAUGHTER
43:36APPLAUSE
43:39Oh, lovely.
43:41One left.
43:42Frankie...
43:43With an unblemished...
43:44Frankie, roll the Jenny Eclare dice.
43:46LAUGHTER
43:47LAUGHTER
43:54I think Frankie was doing Kiel.
43:58May Martin!
43:59LAUGHTER
44:00And there we are.
44:01APPLAUSE
44:01We'll add all that to the final scores.
44:03We'll see where we get to.
44:04Come on down and join me.
44:09CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:12APPLAUSE
44:12You're the bestest tasks.
44:14Good boy.
44:15Thanks, mate.
44:15Oh, can I call you mate?
44:16Thanks, mate?
44:17No.
44:17No.
44:19Yes, well, Kiel, May and Frankie came joint first.
44:22They each got two out of the three.
44:24So they get five points each.
44:26Well done, then.
44:26CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:29Unfortunately, thanks to Ivo throwing a go
44:30and Jenny's Newcastle abomination,
44:33they come joint fourth, so get two points each.
44:37There we go.
44:37They still did very well.
44:39You have a new winner.
44:40Never guess who it is.
44:42With 20 points, it's Kiel Smith-Bainer!
44:45CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:46Kiel Smith-Bainer wins!
44:48Please pop up to collect your proper prizes!
44:51CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:54See you then soon, but please, let's hear it once more
44:56for tonight's winner, Kiel Smith-Bainer!
44:59CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
45:22APPLAUSE
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