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The Crown S02E05 [Full Movie] [Full Story]Full EP - Full
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00:00:08The Queen's Critic is headed again!
00:00:11Here, attach the Queen!
00:00:14Queen's Critic!
00:00:17Queen's Critic is headed again!
00:00:19Come on, Jack.
00:00:21I'll take one of each this morning, please.
00:00:24And a sundae as well.
00:00:27That's right.
00:00:30Queen's Critic is headed again!
00:00:32Here, attach the Queen!
00:00:50No, I shan't have anything.
00:00:53Sorry, dear.
00:01:21I think it's right.
00:01:23Do you?
00:01:24Yeah.
00:01:25Now I think about it, she is a bit priggish.
00:01:28Ha ha ha ha!
00:01:33Good boy, man!
00:01:35You can hang up for the next day!
00:01:38There's a lot left.
00:01:40There's a lot left.
00:01:45Thank you, Maa.
00:01:51Go back and forth!
00:01:52Take care!
00:01:53That's a good boy!
00:01:57Come on, then. That's it.
00:02:00Don't push them.
00:02:01You're not altering them.
00:02:03Yes.
00:02:07Get straight up!
00:02:44Really?
00:02:48Really.
00:02:54Really?
00:02:55Well, I shall certainly let Her Majesty know.
00:03:04Time and tide, Mr. Conservator.
00:03:07Wait for no man, Private Secretary.
00:03:09Good afternoon to you.
00:03:11Good afternoon, sir.
00:03:24What is it now?
00:03:27Lord Altrincham has been struck.
00:03:33Dumb, I hope.
00:03:35Better than that, ma'am.
00:03:37In the face.
00:03:39Quite forcefully, I'm told.
00:03:42By whom?
00:03:44Which gallant and chivalrous individual?
00:03:46I'm afraid we don't have those details yet.
00:03:50The incident occurred outside the television studios,
00:03:53and the perpetrator is now on his way to the Bow Street police station,
00:03:58where we expect him to be released without charge.
00:04:02Well, how very gratifying.
00:04:05Yes.
00:04:06Very.
00:04:08Which television studios?
00:04:10The Independent Television Network studios, ma'am,
00:04:13where Altrincham had just recorded an interview.
00:04:17For what?
00:04:19A programme appropriately called Impact.
00:04:23When will it air?
00:04:25Tonight, ma'am.
00:04:27Nine o'clock.
00:04:47Tell the people.
00:04:48Tell them on television.
00:04:51Questions in the public mind.
00:04:53Answered by people in the public eye.
00:04:56This is Impact.
00:04:57A programme that examines the most important matters of the moment.
00:05:02And which will debate to you at home.
00:05:05Sorry, I'm late.
00:05:05Robin Day puts the question.
00:05:07It's just starting.
00:05:10Tonight, we have a man who, because of press activity in recent days,
00:05:14probably needs no introduction.
00:05:15Lord Altrincham.
00:05:16In the space of just a few days,
00:05:18his inflammatory and deeply personal attacks on the Queen,
00:05:21in a periodical of which he is also publisher,
00:05:23have become the most pressing issue of the day,
00:05:26and caused something of a constitutional crisis.
00:05:29So, I'd like to begin by asking Lord Altrincham a simple question.
00:05:34She's our Head of State,
00:05:36loved, respected and admired throughout the world.
00:05:39So, why do you hate her so very much?
00:06:10How do you wait only,
00:06:11you know...
00:06:11You know...
00:07:14It's far too long.
00:07:15People are beginning to notice.
00:07:17And that is why the...
00:07:22And that is why the ending of doctrinal tests
00:07:25and the introduction of women priests
00:07:26is the only viable solution for saving the Church of England,
00:07:30an institution that is becoming increasingly outdated
00:07:33and irrelevant hour by hour.
00:07:36Who's got a thousand words for me on that?
00:07:38Hello, Patricia.
00:07:40Would anyone like some toffee?
00:07:41Oh, bring it over here, Patricia darling.
00:07:49Oh, divine.
00:07:51Much like Patricia herself.
00:07:53Come, come, my dear.
00:07:54Be seated.
00:07:58Right.
00:07:59If no-one's keen on the Church story,
00:08:02I can knock something up.
00:08:03Now, a piece on reforming the House of Laws.
00:08:06Dermot.
00:08:07You were going to look at that for me, weren't you?
00:08:08Something nutty about it.
00:08:10Mmm.
00:08:11Molasses.
00:08:11And Europe.
00:08:13We need to work out our official stance.
00:08:15Are we for or against a single European market?
00:08:21Are we in or out?
00:08:25Toffee, John.
00:08:27Oh, you must try some, John.
00:08:29Afraid I have a thing against toffee.
00:08:34Why didn't I know that?
00:08:37You can't know everything about me.
00:08:42It's not the taste I object to so much.
00:08:45I just have painful memories.
00:08:49As a child.
00:08:51Or sitting in a dentist's chair
00:08:54because of a piece of toffee I ate.
00:08:58Oh.
00:09:01Oh, Lord.
00:09:03Not again.
00:09:05Sorry.
00:09:07Have I...
00:09:08Sorry?
00:09:10Perhaps you don't.
00:09:11Understand
00:09:12that on your steadfastness
00:09:14and ability
00:09:15to withstand
00:09:16the fatigue
00:09:17of dull, repetitive work
00:09:20and your great courage
00:09:22in meeting
00:09:22constant,
00:09:24small adversities
00:09:25depend in great measure
00:09:28the happiness
00:09:29and prosperity
00:09:30of the community
00:09:31as a whole.
00:09:38the upward course
00:09:40of a nation's history
00:09:41is due
00:09:42in the long run
00:09:44to the soundness
00:09:45of heart
00:09:46of its average
00:09:47men and women.
00:09:51Um...
00:09:53working men and women?
00:09:57It has a touch
00:09:58more dignity.
00:09:59Yeah.
00:10:06No, I think average
00:10:07is fine.
00:10:22what you might be interested
00:10:24to see this.
00:10:25It's a draft
00:10:26of a speech
00:10:27the Queen's going to give
00:10:28in a week's time.
00:10:30I don't mind telling you
00:10:31I felt a bit uneasy
00:10:32about it.
00:10:49Sir, forgive me
00:10:52if I'm interfering
00:10:53beyond my station.
00:11:01Tommy.
00:11:02Arthur.
00:11:04You were about
00:11:05to interfere
00:11:05beyond your station.
00:11:09It's concerning
00:11:10the speech
00:11:11the Queen is due
00:11:12to give next week
00:11:13at the Jagger car factory.
00:11:16What about it?
00:11:17I was just
00:11:19wondering
00:11:19if you were happy
00:11:20with it.
00:11:24Well, obviously
00:11:25I'm happy with it.
00:11:26Or I wouldn't have
00:11:27shown it to Her Majesty
00:11:29for the approval
00:11:30which she immediately gave.
00:11:33Did the Queen read it?
00:11:34She didn't need to.
00:11:36She merely asked
00:11:37if I was happy.
00:11:39I replied in the affirmative.
00:11:41And that was
00:11:43good enough
00:11:43for Her Majesty.
00:11:46But I can see
00:11:48that the really
00:11:49important question is
00:11:50is it good enough
00:11:52for Colonel
00:11:53Charteries?
00:11:55You don't think
00:11:57it strikes
00:11:58the wrong tone?
00:12:00In which sense?
00:12:02In its
00:12:05paternalism.
00:12:07May I?
00:12:12Sir?
00:12:13I suppose
00:12:14if I
00:12:15had a concern
00:12:18it would be
00:12:19it would be
00:12:19that post-Suez
00:12:20in this new
00:12:22climate
00:12:23in this new
00:12:24Britain
00:12:26the tone
00:12:27of the speech
00:12:28is
00:12:30somewhat
00:12:30somewhat what?
00:12:36Old-fashioned.
00:12:39And would leave
00:12:40her open
00:12:41to attack
00:12:41from whom?
00:12:42the newspapers.
00:12:46People.
00:12:47If I had a shilling
00:12:48for every time
00:12:49someone of a
00:12:50progressive or
00:12:51liberal disposition
00:12:52had warned
00:12:52needlessly
00:12:53of a popular
00:12:54attack against
00:12:55the crown
00:12:55I'd be a rich man.
00:12:57The British people
00:12:58adore their sovereign.
00:13:00It is what
00:13:00constitutes
00:13:01indeed defines
00:13:02being British.
00:13:04Now the worst
00:13:05I've ever encountered
00:13:06is apathy
00:13:07where people
00:13:08simply accept
00:13:09the king or queen
00:13:10as they accept
00:13:10the sky above
00:13:11their heads.
00:13:12But it's a long
00:13:13way from apathy
00:13:14to insurrection.
00:13:16Now as regards
00:13:17the newspapers
00:13:18the crown can count
00:13:19on their support
00:13:20for two reasons.
00:13:21First
00:13:21there is nothing
00:13:22to attack.
00:13:24That's the advantage
00:13:24of a constitutional
00:13:25monarchy.
00:13:26They have no power
00:13:28so there's nothing
00:13:28to complain about.
00:13:29And even
00:13:30if they wanted to
00:13:31they'd always let
00:13:32us know first.
00:13:34The palace would
00:13:34then threaten them
00:13:35with a boycott
00:13:36on the next
00:13:36major royal event
00:13:37causing the newspapers
00:13:39immediately
00:13:40to back down
00:13:40because the very
00:13:42people you fear
00:13:43will hate
00:13:44the queen
00:13:45and the same ones
00:13:46who buy copies
00:13:47in their millions.
00:13:49Why?
00:13:50Because they love her.
00:13:55So I'm
00:13:56worrying unnecessarily.
00:13:58Martin
00:13:59I shall leave
00:14:01the drawing of that
00:14:02inescapable conclusion
00:14:03to you.
00:14:22I'm going to take it
00:14:23in a little
00:14:23shorter, ma'am
00:14:24and rounder
00:14:25at the back.
00:14:26Lovely.
00:14:27I shall know.
00:14:30I shall know.
00:14:32You're going to take it
00:14:37longer.
00:14:38I'll be there
00:14:40next way.
00:14:44See you at the end.
00:14:49See you at the end.
00:14:51You're going to take it
00:14:52I will take it out.
00:14:57You're going to take it away.
00:14:57You're going to take it away.
00:15:17I like it very much.
00:15:44I thought you were hoping for more children from me.
00:15:49I am.
00:15:52Why on earth would you do something like that to your hair?
00:15:55What's wrong with it?
00:15:59I thought it was tidy and sensible.
00:16:02Adjectives to stir the loins?
00:16:05Apparently it's very animoge.
00:16:07All the regimental wives are wearing their hair like this now.
00:16:10Really?
00:16:11Yes.
00:16:11It's certainly very practical.
00:16:14And should you ever feel compelled to ride a motorcycle, it could always double as a helmet.
00:16:20Well, I like it.
00:16:24I have nothing against it, Pastor.
00:16:27Stop it.
00:16:28She won't provide ample protection against any falling masonry.
00:16:37But if enlarging the family and enticing your husband to procreate is the goal...
00:16:43It is.
00:16:44Then you might take a look at Jane Mansfield.
00:16:48Or Rita Hayworth.
00:16:51Or Rita Hayworth.
00:16:53Or Rita Hayworth.
00:17:18Welcome, Your Majesty.
00:17:20Thank you, sir.
00:17:21Elliot.
00:17:23Elliot.
00:17:24It's very, um, spacious.
00:17:27This is our research and development area.
00:17:29No, no, it's all not.
00:17:31May I introduce you, ma'am, to Nigel Willoughby,
00:17:33who sketches all of our prototypes?
00:17:36You started drawing, did you?
00:17:38Very good, sir.
00:17:40And that's a chess.
00:17:41Yes, indeed.
00:17:42A finished MK1, Your Majesty.
00:17:45Ah, no, it's lovely.
00:17:47With top speeds of
00:17:48over a hundred miles per hour.
00:17:51Quite the thing, I've always been
00:17:53interested in the red leather.
00:17:54Is it horse or cow?
00:17:57Hello.
00:18:10I wish first to express to you
00:18:13my very great pleasure
00:18:15at being here today.
00:18:18My husband and I
00:18:19have been most profoundly moved
00:18:21by your hospitable welcome
00:18:24and would like you to know
00:18:26how very grateful we are
00:18:27to you all for the work
00:18:29that you do.
00:18:32We understand that in the turbulence
00:18:35of this anxious and active world,
00:18:38many of you are leading uneventful, lonely lives,
00:18:44where dreariness is the enemy.
00:18:48Perhaps you don't understand
00:18:51that on your steadfastness
00:18:52and ability to withstand the fatigue
00:18:55of dull, repetitive work
00:18:59depend in great measure
00:19:00the happiness and prosperity
00:19:03of the community as a whole.
00:19:07the upward course of a nation's history
00:19:10is due, in the long run,
00:19:13to the soundness of heart
00:19:14of its average men and women.
00:19:18May you be proud to remember
00:19:20how much depends on you
00:19:22and that even when your life
00:19:25seems most monotonous,
00:19:27what you do
00:19:28is always of real value
00:19:31and importance
00:19:32to your fellow.
00:19:34Well, let's have a wonderful time.
00:19:36Well, let's have a wonderful time.
00:19:39Come on, everybody,
00:19:40let's have a wonderful time.
00:19:42Lord Orchner?
00:19:44Evening, Richard!
00:19:46News Corical!
00:19:48Evening, Richard!
00:19:50Tick!
00:19:55Ah, I need a favour, some typing.
00:19:57Oh, you're going home.
00:19:59I don't need to be.
00:20:04I've just heard a ridiculous speech by the Queen
00:20:08and I want to write an immediate response.
00:20:11I'll find someone else.
00:20:13No, no, it's no trouble.
00:20:15I had nothing else planned.
00:20:45I've had another thought.
00:20:47Super.
00:20:49A rather heretical thought.
00:20:51I got the idea from something Walter Badgett said
00:20:54about the first duty of royalty being to inspire.
00:20:57I'm not going to be a driver.
00:20:59No, no, no, no, no.
00:21:05No, no, no, no, no, no.
00:21:22I'm not going to be a driver.
00:21:23I love you.
00:21:26I'm not going to be a driver.
00:28:16I asked you to come because I had a phone call an hour ago from a television producer
00:28:21inviting me to record an interview this afternoon.
00:28:25Which program?
00:28:27Impact.
00:28:28With Robin Day.
00:28:31I wish it weren't day.
00:28:33We all wish it weren't day.
00:28:35It's terrifying.
00:28:36Don't be silly.
00:28:37The fact that it's day is what makes it valuable.
00:28:41You don't think I'm walking into a trap?
00:28:43You walked into the trap when you wrote the article.
00:28:46Now you're the most unloved individual in Britain.
00:28:50Ironically, Day is the one person who could help you.
00:28:54Why?
00:28:56You've seen how he interviews people.
00:28:58He dismembers them.
00:29:00Tears them to shreds.
00:29:01Yes.
00:29:02But keep your cool under his scrutiny.
00:29:05Make your case politely.
00:29:07Respectfully.
00:29:08Intelligently.
00:29:10It could turn people around.
00:29:23Thank you very much.
00:29:31Lord Aldrian, how do you do?
00:29:33How do you do?
00:29:33Shall we?
00:29:34Yes.
00:29:34This way.
00:29:35Thank you for coming.
00:29:36Not at all.
00:29:37How long do we have until we start?
00:29:39Well, we'll put them to make up quickly.
00:29:40We should make start for 10 minutes.
00:29:43Just here.
00:29:44Shall we?
00:29:45All right.
00:29:48Let myself to water.
00:29:50Shouldn't be too long.
00:29:53All good.
00:29:58Be standing by, sir.
00:30:00Be prepared.
00:30:05Let's make a start.
00:30:13Can we tell them how all this works?
00:30:15Recording now.
00:30:16Transmission tonight.
00:30:18Yes.
00:30:20Five, four, three.
00:30:25Tonight we have a man who, because of press activity in recent days, probably needs no
00:30:30introduction, Lord Altrincham.
00:30:32In the space of just a few days, his inflammatory and deeply personal attacks on the Queen, in
00:30:37a periodical of which he is also publisher, have become the most pressing issue of the
00:30:42day and caused something of a constitutional crisis.
00:30:45So I'd like to begin by asking Lord Altrincham a simple question.
00:30:50She's our head of state, loved, respected, and admired around the world.
00:30:54So why do you hate her so very much?
00:30:57I don't.
00:30:59Then why criticize her like this?
00:31:02That's like asking an art critic why he criticizes art.
00:31:06I'm a passionate monarchist who believes constitutional monarchy is Britain's greatest invention.
00:31:11Do you, indeed?
00:31:13Yes, I do.
00:31:14I believe that monarchy provides clarity.
00:31:16A symbolic head of state transcending the self-serving interests of the egocentric and
00:31:23self-motivated politicians who go in and out of office, who, as King Lear wonderfully
00:31:29says, ebb and flow by the moon.
00:31:31But when working at its best, monarchy can rise above such matters and unify a society.
00:31:37It can set the tone and become the embodiment of the nation, of national character.
00:31:42But the problem is, at the moment, it's not doing that.
00:31:46It's doing very little right, as far as you're concerned.
00:31:48No, that's not true.
00:31:50You would like to see Her Majesty endowed with superhuman powers.
00:31:53It's not superhuman to be a little spontaneous.
00:31:55Judging from your article, you'd like the Queen to have the qualities of a wit.
00:31:59You'd like her to be a better orator, a TV personality, in addition to being a diligent,
00:32:06dutiful and devoted monarch and a mother.
00:32:08All I'm suggesting is that in her public speeches and in her appearances, she should be more natural.
00:32:15Her style of speaking is, quite frankly, a pain in the neck.
00:32:20She sounds strangled.
00:32:23I had the misfortune of hearing one of the Queen's speeches in a dental waiting room recently.
00:32:28I was horrified by the indifference and inertia with which the speech was greeted.
00:32:35But you'd accept that being Queen and Head of the Church of England is not an easy job, or a
00:32:40simple one.
00:32:40If you'll forgive me, it's arguably a harder job than editing a small periodical.
00:32:46No, I quite agree.
00:32:47Her Majesty is a seemingly impossible task.
00:32:50She has to be ordinary and extraordinary, touched by divinity and yet one of us.
00:32:55But being ordinary doesn't have to mean bland, or ineffectual, or forgettable.
00:33:03And against whom do you lay the main charge?
00:33:05Her courtiers?
00:33:06In the end, if the court is wrong, if the set-up is wrong, you have no choice but to
00:33:11criticise the boss.
00:33:12The Queen?
00:33:13Yes, because only the boss can get rid of the bad servants.
00:33:18She hires them.
00:33:19She alone can fire them.
00:33:22Now, they may be bad.
00:33:23I believe some of them at the moment are.
00:33:25They're quite dreadful.
00:33:26But it is her responsibility.
00:33:29It's not theirs, in the sense that they're just hired hands.
00:33:32And so, the personal attack on the monarch continues.
00:33:36Let me just say this.
00:33:38To criticise the monarchy, to criticise Her Majesty, personally, gives me no satisfaction.
00:33:44But we have to remember that since the Second World War, since Suez, Britain has changed beyond recognition.
00:33:51And yet the monarchy continues its pre-war routines as though nothing has happened.
00:33:56Now, I believe it would serve the Queen and her courtiers well to remember that until recently, monarchies were the
00:34:02rule, and republics the exception.
00:34:04But today, republics are the rule, and monarchies very much the exception.
00:34:14Lord Altringham, I have to terminate the interview.
00:34:16I'm obliged to you for answering my questions.
00:34:19Next week, at the same time, there will be another edition of Impact.
00:34:23Good night.
00:34:25That went very well.
00:34:34Thank you again, Lord Altringham.
00:34:35Good afternoon, thank you.
00:34:36Good day.
00:34:48Lord Altringham?
00:34:50Yes?
00:34:52You traitor!
00:35:00Congratulations.
00:35:01Well done.
00:35:03Now some white?
00:35:04Well done.
00:35:05Something stronger.
00:35:06What about a brandy?
00:35:08Why not?
00:35:09Well done.
00:35:11Well done.
00:35:17Well done.
00:35:31Your majesty.
00:35:32Yes, what is it, Michael?
00:35:35There have been some reactions in the newspapers
00:35:38to last night's television interview
00:35:40and to the assault upon Lord Altrincham.
00:35:43I'm afraid it's not quite as we'd hoped.
00:35:49Why not?
00:35:52Well, the man that struck Altrincham, it turns out,
00:35:55is a member of the extreme right League of Empire Loyalists,
00:36:00which is a pressure group that campaigns
00:36:03against the dissolution of the Empire
00:36:06and has a clear doctrine of English racial supremacy.
00:36:10Oh, dear.
00:36:12And it seems that most people have decided,
00:36:16having watched Altrincham on television,
00:36:19that he is eminently reasonable.
00:36:25Now, almost half the country
00:36:28appears to agree with his sentiments,
00:36:31and there are new polls to support this.
00:36:34Letters to the Daily Mirror are running at four to one
00:36:37in Altrincham's favour.
00:36:39And even the normally conservative Daily Mail
00:36:45changed its tune this morning.
00:36:49In addition,
00:36:50and this, I believe,
00:36:52reflects on his growing concern
00:36:54at some of the telephone calls
00:36:56that he has been receiving,
00:36:58the Prime Minister suggested
00:37:00that he come up a week earlier than planned
00:37:03in order to discuss it all with you in person.
00:37:08Goodness.
00:37:09A constitutional crisis.
00:37:12Well, I hope you're going to apologise
00:37:14to Mr Macmillan, too.
00:37:16No.
00:37:17You're not going to deny
00:37:18that this hell mess
00:37:19springs from a badly written speech
00:37:20which I gave unquestioningly
00:37:22because I trusted you.
00:37:25Perhaps Lord Altrincham is right.
00:37:27Perhaps I should surround myself
00:37:28with younger, more dynamic people
00:37:30with one foot in the real world.
00:37:34Come on.
00:38:01And you believe it's now a government measure?
00:38:03I do, ma'am.
00:38:06Ambassadors from all around the world
00:38:08have been calling me.
00:38:10Concerned.
00:38:12Her Majesty will hardly need reminding
00:38:14a great many other countries
00:38:16have overthrown their monarchies
00:38:18and become republics in recent years.
00:38:22Egypt, Bulgaria, Italy,
00:38:24Tunisia only last month.
00:38:26Of course, we're not at that point.
00:38:29Not at a red light.
00:38:31We're not even at an amber.
00:38:34But we'd hate it to become amber.
00:38:38And so it is my view,
00:38:40the government's view,
00:38:41that it would be wise
00:38:42to contain this as soon as possible.
00:38:44And do what?
00:38:46The obvious thing.
00:38:49Altrincham is a fire
00:38:51which needs to be put out.
00:38:55Go at you!
00:39:03Go at you!
00:39:19Go at you!
00:39:28The palace has offered up a chap called Charteris to meet.
00:39:35I looked him up.
00:39:36He used to be her principal private secretary.
00:39:40Well, there you are.
00:39:42Before the king died.
00:39:45When she was princess.
00:39:48And now?
00:39:50He's assistant, private secretary.
00:39:54So, not quite a pawn, but certainly not a bishop or knight either.
00:39:59Go.
00:40:01Go in order to be fobbed off.
00:40:03Go in the spirit of openness and wanting to work together.
00:40:06Wanting to work together, they would have sent someone higher up.
00:40:09Go.
00:40:11All right.
00:40:13And take a list of suggestions.
00:40:16Recommendations.
00:40:18Don't go empty-handed.
00:40:26Not yet.
00:40:28John.
00:40:28Your tooth.
00:40:29John.
00:40:31Sorry.
00:40:37Sorry.
00:40:37Sorry.
00:40:39Sorry.
00:40:46Sorry.
00:41:01I was coming, sir.
00:41:03Oh, no.
00:41:03I was coming, sir.
00:41:04Hold on.
00:41:06I'm coming.
00:41:07What's coming, sir?
00:41:08I was coming.
00:41:09Let's go!
00:41:33Lord Ortringham?
00:41:35Yes.
00:41:36This way, please.
00:42:05Good to know I'm seeing the top man.
00:42:11In one sense.
00:42:20Here we are, Lord Ortringham.
00:42:22Colonel Charteris will be with you shortly.
00:42:28Sir.
00:42:52I see we have something in common.
00:42:57And what would that be?
00:43:05Your Majesty.
00:43:10I was referring to the photos of Eton and Sandhurst.
00:43:15Oh.
00:43:16Which you attended to, I gather.
00:43:19Yes.
00:43:20Going on to become an officer of the guards at both St. James's Palace and Windsor Castle.
00:43:27Doesn't quite fit the profile of a revolutionary.
00:43:31It's the assumption everyone has made that because I dare offer an opinion I must be trying to burn the
00:43:36temple down.
00:43:38On the contrary, I'm trying to make sure it survives.
00:43:42Well, those of us in the temple are very much looking forward to hearing what it is we must do
00:43:47in order to survive.
00:43:50Shall we begin?
00:43:55Is my voice all right?
00:43:58You can understand me?
00:44:00Yes.
00:44:02Not too strangled?
00:44:03Not too much of pain in the neck?
00:44:06No.
00:44:06No.
00:44:07Good.
00:44:10So, what is it that you'd have me change?
00:44:13It's not so much what I'd have you change.
00:44:16Just an acknowledgement that it has changed.
00:44:20What?
00:44:22Everything.
00:44:25And to prepare yourself for the fact we now live in a time where people like me...
00:44:32Can say exactly what they think?
00:44:34Yes.
00:44:35In any way they want?
00:44:37Yes.
00:44:38And remind me, why is that exactly?
00:44:43Because the age of deference is over.
00:44:48And what is left without deference?
00:44:52Anarchy?
00:44:54Equality.
00:44:55How can it be equality when I cannot return the fire?
00:44:58You can.
00:44:59But I struggle to think of a moment in history where it has worked to a monarch's advantage to return
00:45:05fire on their own people.
00:45:07But you have managed to think of how this monarch might do something to her advantage.
00:45:12I have.
00:45:14And that same monarch is sitting before, forgive me, a failed politician and an unrecognized journalist.
00:45:25And taking his advice on how to do her job.
00:45:30The situation is as baffling to me as it is to you, your majesty.
00:45:48Ah!
00:45:49You've got a list.
00:45:51I do.
00:45:53As you might know from my article, I made a series of observations.
00:45:58Recommendations of things to change.
00:46:00But for the purposes of this meeting, I chose to limit those recommendations to, um, six.
00:46:07Six.
00:46:09Three things to start and three things to stop.
00:46:13Well, let's start with the stops.
00:46:17Very well.
00:46:18Ah, yes.
00:46:20Putting an end to the debutante's ball.
00:46:24The idea that only young women of a certain class are presented to the Sovereign,
00:46:29and women who are not of that class are not presented to the Sovereign and somehow not acceptable.
00:46:35This is the sort of iniquity that should have died out with our grandparents' generation, certainly after the war.
00:46:46Next.
00:46:49Uh, allow divorced people to move more freely in royal circles.
00:46:58Why?
00:47:00The Sovereign is head of the Church of England, and the Church does not recognise divorced persons.
00:47:05It's unkind.
00:47:08Discriminatory.
00:47:09Quite possibly unlawful.
00:47:14Next.
00:47:17Uh, I would recommend getting rid of an entire generation of court here.
00:47:22The old school.
00:47:24Stuck in the past.
00:47:26Ostriches, with their heads buried in the sand.
00:47:30They're stopping the palace evolve in keeping with the rest of the world.
00:47:33Those ostriches provide an indispensable function of monarchy.
00:47:39The preservation of tradition.
00:47:44You asked for my recommendations, ma'am.
00:47:48I'm respectfully passing them on.
00:47:54What would you have me start?
00:47:58Open up, ma'am.
00:48:01Know the drawbridge.
00:48:03Let people get to know you.
00:48:05I don't wish to be known.
00:48:09Televise the Christmas speech.
00:48:12Become more transparent.
00:48:14Accessible.
00:48:18And finally.
00:48:19Oh, finally.
00:48:20Spend time with normal people.
00:48:23Not just courtiers or the great and the good, but real people.
00:48:27Average people.
00:48:29Working people.
00:48:32Open the doors.
00:48:34Make it more inclusive and egalitarian.
00:48:40Let normal people get to know you too.
00:48:56Would you mind stepping out into the corridor for a moment?
00:48:59No, not at all.
00:49:08And would you ask my private secretary to come in?
00:49:12Of course.
00:49:20Your Majesty.
00:49:45Your Majesty.
00:49:48What Is he doing?
00:49:49All that is.
00:49:53Those Dads in order to meet the strappler.
00:49:55Any怎 I have.
00:49:57Shh.
00:50:02No issues.
00:50:04Please.
00:50:18When I went back into the room, she was gone.
00:50:24Vanished into thin air.
00:50:26Do sit down.
00:50:28Charteris then went home to tell me that no one can ever know that I met the Queen.
00:50:33And that should I ever claim that I did, the palace would robustly deny it.
00:50:38They will, however, concede that I had an appointment with Her Majesty's Assistant, Private Secretary.
00:50:44And that concessions might be made to one or two of my recommendations.
00:50:51May I ask which ones?
00:51:00Let's get these lights in, quickly.
00:51:02Let's get these with that camera.
00:51:03Right here.
00:51:05This one next.
00:51:07Well done.
00:51:08Now let's have the rest of the table.
00:51:20I feel like an actress.
00:51:23A common little showgirl.
00:51:25Don't be silly.
00:51:28In what way am I different?
00:51:31Memorising lines and remembering angles and wearing make-up.
00:51:36The Queen of the United Kingdom, for one thing.
00:51:39Yes.
00:51:40It was memorising lines and remembering angles and wearing make-up.
00:51:54Your Majesty.
00:51:56Right.
00:51:59Where do you want me?
00:52:00This way, please, ma'am.
00:52:10Is that right?
00:52:12I would find somebody in there.
00:52:13That's all.
00:52:14Of course.
00:52:14We will everyone.
00:52:15Check for you.
00:52:15Everyone on standby?
00:52:16Just in here.
00:52:19Boom.
00:52:20Boom.
00:52:21Boom.
00:52:21Boom.
00:52:23Boom.
00:52:23Good water.
00:52:25Boom.
00:52:26Bum.
00:52:26Boom zoom.
00:52:29Boom.
00:52:30Boom.
00:52:31Boom.
00:52:36Matt.
00:53:27Happy Christmas.
00:53:33Twenty-five years ago, my grandfather broadcast the first of these Christmas messages.
00:53:41Today is another landmark, because television has made it possible for many of you to see
00:53:47me in your homes on Christmas Day.
00:53:51My own family often gather round to watch the television, as they are at this moment,
00:53:57and that is how I think of you all now.
00:53:59I very much hope that this new medium will make my Christmas message more personal and
00:54:07direct.
00:54:10It is inevitable that I should seem a rather remote figure to many of you, a successor
00:54:18to the kings and queens of history.
00:54:20Someone whose face may be familiar in newspapers and films, but who never really touches your
00:54:28personal lives.
00:54:30But now, at least for a few minutes, I welcome you into the peace of my own home.
00:54:42That it is possible for some of you to see me today is just another example of the speed
00:54:49at which things are changing all around us.
00:54:57I would like to read a few lines from Pilgrim's Progress.
00:55:09And though with great difficulty I am got hither, yet now I do repent me of all the trouble
00:55:17I have been at to arrive where I am.
00:55:20My sword I give to him that shall succeed me in my pilgrimage, and my courage and skill to
00:55:29him that can get it.
00:55:32My marks and scars I carry with me to be a witness for me that I have fought his battles,
00:55:41who now will be my rewarder.
00:55:51I hope that 1958 may bring you God's blessings and all the things that you long for.
00:56:01And so I wish you all, young and old, wherever you may be, all the fun and enjoyment and peace
00:56:10of a very happy Christmas.
00:56:15And we're off air.
00:56:30Congratulations.
00:56:32Thank you very much.
00:57:14Oh, hello.
00:57:15Hi.
00:57:17You look pretty, like the dress.
00:57:20Oh, thank you.
00:57:21And the hair, very unregimental.
00:57:23Oh, yes, Tony, need the top person, of course.
00:57:25Only stylist who could be trusted.
00:57:27Hmm.
00:57:28Does he have a name, this stylist?
00:57:31I want to say Victor Gabon.
00:57:32No, that's not quite right.
00:57:35Um...
00:57:36Vidal Baboon?
00:57:36Vidal Baboon?
00:57:38Yes, I think.
00:57:38Well, anyway, I talk endlessly about the hair as a geometric art form.
00:57:41It looks jolly pretty.
00:57:43And if you happen to have a number for this baboon, I might pass it on to my wife.
00:57:48Is that appropriate, by the way, that a red-blooded man should know the correct hairdresser for a woman?
00:57:53There's almost nothing that's appropriate about Tony, but he's made it his mission in life to improve me.
00:58:00Your very own little old Tringham?
00:58:02Yes.
00:58:03Just rather better in bed, I suspect.
00:58:09Oh, dear God.
00:58:10Good one.
00:58:16There it is.
00:58:18Thank you very much.
00:58:21Who do you suppose that is?
00:58:22It could be Mr. David Smith, a car dealer.
00:58:29And that?
00:58:31I believe that is...
00:58:34Harriet the Hammer Jones.
00:58:37A boxer from the old Kent Road.
00:58:42Rounding up the numbers, we have a local restaurateur,
00:58:45a bus driver,
00:58:47a bank clerk,
00:58:50and a woman policeman.
00:58:54All to open things up.
00:58:56Yes.
00:58:57Bring us more in line with the real world.
00:58:59Democratise us.
00:59:02And so it goes.
00:59:05As stings and bites we suffer.
00:59:08As it slips away.
00:59:11Bit by bit.
00:59:12Piece by piece.
00:59:15Our authority.
00:59:17Our absolutism.
00:59:19Our divine rights.
00:59:30The history of the monarchy in this country is a one-way street of humiliation.
00:59:34Sacrifices and concessions in order to survive.
00:59:37First the barons came for us, then the merchants, now the journalists.
00:59:41Small wonder we make such a fuss about curtsies, protocol and precedent.
00:59:44It's all we have left.
00:59:46The last scraps of armour as we go from ruling to reigning to...
00:59:53To what?
00:59:54To being nothing at all.
00:59:59Marionettes.
01:00:07Right.
01:00:08Gloves on.
01:00:09What?
01:00:13I told the master of the household to rotate the guests between courses,
01:00:17so if you get a dud, don't worry.
01:00:19It'll be 15 minutes at worst.
01:00:43Mr. and Mrs. David Smith.
01:00:44Ah, here we go.
01:00:45Hello, thank you.
01:00:47Very nice.
01:00:48Mr. and Mrs. Patel.
01:00:49Hello, dear.
01:00:50Thank you for coming.
01:00:52Mr. Harry the Hamlet.
01:00:53Hi, thank you so much for having me.
01:00:55Thank you so much for having me.
01:00:57Mr. Martin Jones.
01:00:58What can't you tell him?
01:01:00Hello, Mrs. Patel.
01:01:03Sergeant Ethel Denmark.
01:01:05Such a pleasure to have you with us.
01:01:07Oh, here he comes.
01:01:08Go, go, go.
01:01:10Go.
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