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Kangaroo Jack (2003) [Full Movie] [Ranked]Full EP - Full
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00I don't know.
00:00:42Australia, the land down under, rugged, remote, inhospitable and dangerous, home to 20 million
00:00:53kangaroos, but there is one who is more elusive and clever than all the rest, and his name
00:01:01is Kangaroo Jack. But my story doesn't begin in Australia. It begins 20 years ago, halfway around
00:01:09the world, on a beach in Brooklyn. That's me, Charlie Carbone. Three things happened on this day that
00:01:18would change my life. First was that my mom met Sal. She hadn't dated much since dad died, but I
00:01:25could
00:01:25tell right away she was interested. Why shouldn't she be? Sal Maggio was a respected member of the
00:01:31community. Well, feared and respected. Well, feared. And that's Frankie Lombardo, fresh out of Juvenile
00:01:39Hall, where they named a wing after him. Sal was grooming Frankie to take over the family business,
00:01:45a family I was about to become a part of. The second thing that happened was that I met Louis
00:01:53Booker.
00:01:58Don't tell me. You got, uh, 75 cents in your bag pocket. You're wrong. It's a Captain Amazing
00:02:04Compass. Whoa! How much you want for it? It's not for sale. No way. Sorry. Want to play some ball?
00:02:11Nah, you play ball. I gotta check every square inch of this beach if I'm gonna make my car payment.
00:02:16You've got a car. No, but I will. Now, step aside. My uncle only rented me this metal detector for
00:02:22the day.
00:02:22And the third... Hey, kid. Most important thing that happened that day...
00:02:27Go long. ...was that I went out for a 20-yard pass.
00:02:31Unfortunately, there was only 15 yards worth of beach.
00:02:35And a really strong undertow. And I couldn't swim.
00:02:45Hey, kid! You lost her!
00:02:53Hey! Somebody help! I think there's a bitch out and I'll... I'll save you!
00:02:59No!
00:03:01Hey!
00:03:09That one moment changed my life.
00:03:12Because in all the years that followed, Lewis Booker was a lot better at getting me into trouble than getting
00:03:17me out.
00:03:18A dreamer in search of treasure who only found bottle caps.
00:03:22On that fateful day, Lewis saved my life.
00:03:24You see this guy?
00:03:26And I never forgot.
00:03:27He just saved your life.
00:03:28He wouldn't let me.
00:03:31And now, it's 20 years later.
00:03:33My new stepfather, Sal, set me up in my own business.
00:03:36A beauty salon.
00:03:37He did it for my mother.
00:03:39Of course, his goons come in every week and take 80% of the profits.
00:03:43That he did for himself.
00:03:45Hey!
00:03:45Ta-bon!
00:03:47And Lewis, the guy who saved my life, is now my closest friend.
00:03:51He thinks I can do a lot better than this, but he also thinks he looks like Denzel Washington.
00:03:56Uh, Toots, I was kind of hoping maybe you could ask Sal if I could keep a little lecture this
00:03:59week.
00:04:00You know, I'd love to make some improvements on the place.
00:04:02Yeah. You want to make improvements?
00:04:04Improve what's in this bag next week.
00:04:06Ugh.
00:04:08Look, man, I need a favor.
00:04:09I just got this job delivering TVs, but my partner got sick.
00:04:12He had one of those microwave chimichangas, man, so...
00:04:14Lewis, why do all your stories start off this way?
00:04:16So, I need your help.
00:04:17If I don't get these TVs off the truck, man, I don't get paid.
00:04:21This sounds illegal.
00:04:22Oh, no, no, no, Charlie, this is totally legit, man.
00:04:25I know the guy.
00:04:26Oh, yeah, just like you knew the guy who asked you to drive his dogs up from Florida.
00:04:29You remember him?
00:04:30Oh, so I'm supposed to know that a bunch of greyhounds were being used to smuggle diamonds?
00:04:36Look, man, I need your help on this one, all right?
00:04:38Two hours tops, that's all I need.
00:04:40This is really important for me.
00:04:42Lewis, you have a job.
00:04:44You call working in my uncle's meat market a job, Charlie?
00:04:47I sweep up cow guts and pig snouts all day, man.
00:04:50I need a job where I'm treated like a man, where I get some respect.
00:04:53Ain't that what Aretha said?
00:04:54R-E-S-P-E-C-T?
00:04:55Well, then, delivering TVs is definitely the answer.
00:04:59You're dying here, man.
00:05:00I need your help.
00:05:03Lewis, I'm busy here.
00:05:04Can't you see I'm busy?
00:05:05I was busy that day 20 years ago on the beach, too, man.
00:05:09But that stopped me from saving the skinny little white kid from failing and serving.
00:05:12No, Charlie, you know, I stopped what I was doing.
00:05:13I just grabbed my stuff and I jumped in and I saved this poor little white kid.
00:05:16Then nobody would get out and save him.
00:05:18Let's go.
00:05:18So I just jumped up and saved him myself.
00:05:20You're too easy.
00:05:23Hey there, Waffles.
00:05:25Got a kiss for your Uncle Charlie?
00:05:28Come on, man.
00:05:28What's wrong?
00:05:30It's just so frustrating.
00:05:31You have no idea how difficult it is to get anywhere when Sal Maggio is your stepfather.
00:05:34Hey, Sal bought you the beauty salon, didn't he?
00:05:36He barely lets me keep enough to stay alive.
00:05:38Hey, look.
00:05:39If Sal Maggio was my stepdaddy, you know what I'd be doing right now?
00:05:43Come on, Charlie.
00:05:44Break it down with me.
00:05:45Snake it.
00:05:46Come on, snake it.
00:05:47Whoa!
00:05:49It'd be a party, Charlie.
00:05:50It'd be a party.
00:05:52Pull over to the curb.
00:05:54Lewis?
00:05:54What?
00:05:55Whose truck is this?
00:05:56That I can't be certain of.
00:05:57It came with the TV.
00:05:58This is a stolen vehicle.
00:06:00Apparently, this is a stolen vehicle.
00:06:02Oh, my God.
00:06:03Pull over to the curb.
00:06:04Pull over to the curb.
00:06:09Lewis, pull the truck over.
00:06:10Just tell him the truth.
00:06:11Pull the truck over.
00:06:12Charlie, I can't pull the truck over, man.
00:06:13I'm still on probation from that Greyhound thing.
00:06:16Come on, Lewis.
00:06:18Watch out.
00:06:19Watch out.
00:06:19Here we go.
00:06:20Okay.
00:06:20You're bringing so many laws right now.
00:06:22Lewis, we go to jail.
00:06:23I'm going to tell everybody you're a hairdresser.
00:06:26Sidewalk, Lewis.
00:06:27Sidewalk.
00:06:29Look out.
00:06:29Are you crazy?
00:06:31Sorry.
00:06:31Excuse me.
00:06:32Red line.
00:06:33Ah!
00:06:39Oh!
00:06:40Oh!
00:06:40Oh!
00:06:40Oh!
00:06:40Oh!
00:06:40Oh!
00:06:41Oh!
00:06:46That wasn't my fault!
00:06:50That was my fault!
00:06:52Ah!
00:06:53Oh!
00:07:00Ah!
00:07:05Ah!
00:07:07Ah!
00:07:08Woo!
00:07:09Almost hit my lucky jacket!
00:07:11Oh!
00:07:11What a relief!
00:07:12I forgot you were wearing your lucky jacket!
00:07:14Woo!
00:07:17Woo!
00:07:17Woo!
00:07:18Woo!
00:07:21Woo!
00:07:21Big problem!
00:07:21One block!
00:07:24Bigger problem!
00:07:28Oh, no!
00:07:30What are you doing?
00:07:31Slow down!
00:07:32Are we gonna make it?
00:07:33Hold on!
00:07:34I'm not gonna make it!
00:07:35We're not gonna make it!
00:07:36Oh, no, no, no, no, no!
00:07:41Woo!
00:07:44Now, that's what I'm talking about!
00:07:46That's what I'm talking about!
00:07:48I think the dog just peed on my leg.
00:07:50No!
00:07:51I think I peed on here!
00:07:52Law units intersection blocked!
00:07:54Suspects are at large!
00:07:55Just pull the truck over!
00:07:56I am getting out!
00:07:57You can't bail on me now, man!
00:07:59Look, I gotta stash these TVs until the heat cools down!
00:08:01Come on!
00:08:02We got six TVs left!
00:08:05Five!
00:08:06Come on, man!
00:08:06Let me get this up!
00:08:08Ah!
00:08:08Oh!
00:08:09Hey!
00:08:10Is that Charlie?
00:08:11Tommy?
00:08:12What are you guys doing here?
00:08:14Your father didn't say you was coming!
00:08:16Sal?
00:08:17Yeah!
00:08:17This is his warehouse!
00:08:19I didn't know!
00:08:20You didn't know!
00:08:21I didn't know!
00:08:23Hey!
00:08:25You brought the heat here, Charlie!
00:08:27Are you crazy?!
00:08:28I didn't know, Tommy!
00:08:29I swear!
00:08:29I didn't know!
00:08:35No!
00:08:37Waffles!
00:08:38Come on!
00:08:39Oh, damn it!
00:08:41This is what we look for, Stefan!
00:08:43We have you surrounded!
00:08:45Come on, Charlie!
00:08:46Come on!
00:08:46Hurry up!
00:08:48Waffles!
00:08:49She's frozen with fear!
00:08:52Surrender!
00:08:52Surrender now!
00:08:53Get over there!
00:08:54Move!
00:08:55Come on!
00:08:56Come on, Lewis!
00:08:57Come on!
00:08:58What is wrong with you?
00:08:59It's not my fault!
00:09:00Waffles is upset!
00:09:01Perhaps you should have thought of that before you took your dog on a crime spree!
00:09:06Come on, girl!
00:09:09Let's go!
00:09:10Let's go!
00:09:11Let's go!
00:09:13Great!
00:09:16Dead end, Lewis!
00:09:17Waffles?
00:09:18Dead end!
00:09:19No, it's not, Charlie!
00:09:20Look at this!
00:09:22I think I've got a way out!
00:09:23You don't even know where that goes!
00:09:25No!
00:09:25We can do this!
00:09:31You can stay up here if you want!
00:09:32I'm going down!
00:09:33That's you!
00:09:34I love you, mama!
00:09:40Lewis?
00:09:58Hey!
00:10:01Not over here!
00:10:02Where's the guy?
00:10:03We lost him!
00:10:04Standing by for further instructions!
00:10:06Over!
00:10:07Anything else you'd like me to help you with today?
00:10:09No!
00:10:10That's pretty much it!
00:10:14That's pretty much it!
00:10:16In what police are calling one of the largest seizures of stolen goods in the history of New York City,
00:10:23thieves inexplicably led police to a treasure trove of stolen cars, furs, paintings...
00:10:30Lewis Booker, you degenerate moron!
00:10:34Were these medieval times in your knight in shining armor, you would, I have no doubt, slay the maiden and
00:10:40save the dragon!
00:10:43Pfft!
00:10:43Lewis!
00:10:44Sal, if we could explain...
00:10:46As for you, Charlie, after the tragic death of your father, I married your mother promising her that I would
00:10:53raise you as my own.
00:10:54You chose not to take the Maggio name, I did not complain.
00:10:57And when you had to go to beauty school, those boys who lose their fathers early in life often do.
00:11:05I did not snivel at your intentions, did I?
00:11:08No, Salvatore, you did not. In fact...
00:11:11I bought a beauty parlor so as you could sit on your lazy butt all day.
00:11:16Four and a half million you cost me, were you anybody else.
00:11:20You'd be dead by now.
00:11:22Sal, we understand that you're upset.
00:11:24It's not your fault.
00:11:26What?
00:11:28A lion can raise a mouse, but the mouse is still a mouse.
00:11:34And you, Charlie, or that mouse.
00:11:38Look at this.
00:11:40He takes it.
00:11:42Chicken blood.
00:11:45Excuse me, Sal.
00:11:47You said that he was a mouse, so that would be mouse blood, not chicken blood.
00:11:52Right?
00:11:55Go on, Sal.
00:11:56Here if you need me.
00:11:57The salient point is, I must continue to live with my lovely wife.
00:12:02And tears on her pillow are a plethora to me.
00:12:06Anathema to me.
00:12:07You see what they got me doing?
00:12:08I can't even talk straight.
00:12:09Take it easy, Sal.
00:12:11So...
00:12:13I'm giving you both another chance to redeem yourselves.
00:12:18Thank you, Sal.
00:12:19We won't disappoint you.
00:12:20No, we won't.
00:12:21Of that, I'm sure.
00:12:23Frankie.
00:12:26Hey, kid.
00:12:28Go along.
00:12:30How'd you fill the boys in?
00:12:31The mission of absolution.
00:12:33It's simple.
00:12:34You take this envelope to JFK airport.
00:12:37No problem.
00:12:38Will you catch tonight's flight from Sydney, Australia?
00:12:40Wow, that's, uh...
00:12:42You know, Lewis has got this thing.
00:12:44Yeah, see, uh, cause my mama, she got the gout.
00:12:47And if I'm not home to rub her feet, you know, her ankles just swell up.
00:12:50And she can't take her house shoes off.
00:12:51Yeah, this, uh...
00:12:52You know, this really isn't much warning.
00:12:53Need a warning?
00:12:55No.
00:12:57From Sydney, you take the old south road due north to a place called Coober Petey,
00:13:02where you meet a man named Mr. Smith.
00:13:05You give this envelope to Mr. Smith.
00:13:09Mr. Smith is expecting you no later than noon local time.
00:13:13You will not be late.
00:13:14What's in here, man?
00:13:15You will not look in that envelope under any circumstances.
00:13:20Understood?
00:13:21I can't hear you.
00:13:22Understood!
00:13:23Oh, yeah.
00:13:25Should you run into any problems, you can reach Mr. Smith at this phone number.
00:13:31Get out of here.
00:13:33I can't believe all of that stuff happened, man.
00:13:35I-I'm wearing my Lucky jacket.
00:13:37Lucky jacket.
00:13:38Lewis, you've been wearing that jacket for over ten years,
00:13:40and I've never seen Lucky even remotely come near you.
00:13:43Nice.
00:13:45Australia.
00:13:46And then they're just gonna turn around and come right back again.
00:13:50It won't be so bad.
00:13:51Why not?
00:13:53We're canceling their return trip.
00:13:56Hey, Lewis, how much time we got left?
00:13:59Fourteen hours.
00:14:00Man, when is the food coming?
00:14:02I'm starving.
00:14:03Oh, don't even worry about that.
00:14:05I got you covered.
00:14:08Bam!
00:14:10Are you, like, four years old?
00:14:12Well, if you're not hungry, I can always put these back in my pocket.
00:14:15Wait, wait, wait.
00:14:16I think I'll have this one.
00:14:18Ah, good choice.
00:14:28What is that?
00:14:29And why is my mouth on fire?
00:14:31Oh, that's the new super atomic jaw buster.
00:14:34Extra hot.
00:14:37Are you trying to kill me?
00:14:43There's something wrong with this.
00:14:45Stop acting like a baby.
00:14:48All right, let me up.
00:14:50What for?
00:14:51How many things could I possibly have to do?
00:14:55My bad.
00:14:56My bad.
00:14:57Yeah.
00:14:58All right.
00:15:03Hey.
00:15:04How you doing?
00:15:06Good.
00:15:22Oh, my God.
00:15:26Hey, Charlie.
00:15:29Someone's in here.
00:15:30Hey, it's me, Charlie.
00:15:31Open up.
00:15:32What?
00:15:33What the?
00:15:34Hey, check this out.
00:15:34Hey, you're not supposed to open this.
00:15:36Hey, man, it's like 50 grand there.
00:15:37Oh, my God.
00:15:38Something doesn't smell right here.
00:15:40Look at it.
00:15:40I know.
00:15:41I'm looking.
00:15:42I've never seen so much green in one little brown package.
00:15:45and now it's in my hands oh it slipped out here help me scoop it up oh this is one
00:15:52big load what
00:15:53a mess I just want to roll around in it hand me the rest of the pile can I hold
00:15:58it no dump it in
00:15:59the envelope maybe we should just flush it we're not gonna flush it I'm gonna put it in my pocket
00:16:04leave this room and take it to Australia well if you're gonna do that give it here let me kiss
00:16:09it
00:16:10for good luck you're not gonna kiss it it's bad enough you touched it Charlie before you put it
00:16:14away can I at least smell it maybe later oh no no no no no it's not what it looks
00:16:21like
00:16:32thanks please good day mate good day good day could you try and not draw the attention of the entire
00:16:40airport thank you why what's wrong the law states were only allowed to have $10,000 we are carrying
00:16:46$50,000 of mob money if they find it I'm anticipating consequences like perhaps I don't know let's say
00:16:54prison hey good night mate you know what it's my fault I didn't keep the sentences short enough
00:17:00hey I heard you Charlie all right now if you're worried give me the money I'll walk it through
00:17:06oh okay let me see put my fate in your hands this is such an agonizing decision no
00:17:14all right then just remember the key is to act like you don't have anything to hide
00:17:19all right thanks please thank you watch the master
00:17:22good day
00:17:45thanks boys
00:17:54good day mate they're my hairdressing scissors they're my hairdressing scissors
00:18:04I can uh I can explain about that money you want to explain 63 dollars
00:18:15Lewis I lost the money what I lost the money Salvatore Maggio's money hey Charlie Charlie calm down
00:18:21all right the trick is not to look suspicious make him watch this hand instead of this
00:18:30how'd you go and didn't I that is not funny Lewis get in the car baby
00:18:35what's up they didn't have a Cadillac this is the Cadillac of the Outback
00:19:03you know Charlie this mysterious Mr. Smith
00:19:09that we're gonna meet I don't think that's his real name nothing escapes you Lewis
00:19:16what's eating you man don't tell me this is about that girl on the plane
00:19:21no it's more than that hey hey Cooper Petey I got it right here
00:19:25I got it I got it here we go
00:19:27here we go let's face it Lewis I'm never gonna find the right girl
00:19:31gotta stop it with this never stuff man two days ago we never thought we'd be in Australia
00:19:36but we here come on Charlie give me a beat come on play with the radio oh man I want
00:19:46to play with you give me a beat man
00:19:55rolling in the land with the deep red sand the big black man the big black man
00:20:03we're living in the land out of love
00:20:07we're living in the land out of love
00:20:11you better run
00:20:13you better run
00:20:14come on
00:20:24what the heck
00:20:26my god I killed a kangaroo
00:20:34I never saw it
00:20:37such a beautiful animal
00:20:38it's the national symbol of Australia
00:20:41and I killed it
00:20:42hey don't worry about that Charlie I read in the book
00:20:44that the kangaroos are the rodents of the Outback
00:20:46we cool
00:20:47shouldn't we bury it or something
00:20:48no look man my uncle has one rule of thumb
00:20:50he says whenever you hit something
00:20:52you keep on rolling
00:20:53so let's roll
00:20:53you can't just leave it in the middle of the road I gotta at least pull it off to the
00:20:56side
00:20:56oh well you pulling by yourself then
00:20:59god I'm so sorry little buddy
00:21:05Charlie don't move stay right there
00:21:08Lewis what are you doing Lewis
00:21:10you guys look so adorable
00:21:13good day mate
00:21:14stop that Lewis
00:21:15hey Charlie hold on hold on hold on
00:21:17you know what he looks like
00:21:19Jackie Legs
00:21:21Jackie Legs from Canarsie with the goatee
00:21:23always wears the sunglasses
00:21:25what are you talking about
00:21:26hold on
00:21:26look
00:21:28okay look at it
00:21:29right there
00:21:29look at that
00:21:32geez that is Jackie Legs
00:21:37alright Lewis enough
00:21:38come on help me here
00:21:39uh uh
00:21:41it's lucky jacket time
00:21:44come on Lewis
00:21:45have some respect
00:21:46it's bad enough we ran him over
00:21:52come on man
00:21:53just one picture for the Brooklyn crew
00:21:55alright just one
00:21:56oh
00:21:57let's make this quick
00:21:58there big boy
00:21:59alright
00:22:00say cheese
00:22:03alright come on
00:22:04let's get this jacket off
00:22:05we got things to do Lewis
00:22:06whoa
00:22:07hey
00:22:08come on Charlie
00:22:08one more
00:22:11this could be our Christmas card
00:22:17Lewis
00:22:17what
00:22:18what
00:22:19what
00:22:25oh
00:22:26oh
00:22:27Charlie
00:22:29oh
00:22:32jeez
00:22:34look
00:22:37we didn't hurt him after all
00:22:38look like we did
00:22:41you're a tough little guy aren't you
00:22:47hey
00:22:47look how tall he is
00:22:56you alright dog
00:22:57come on
00:22:58come on
00:23:04I just got my ass kicked by a marsupial
00:23:11you want to know the best part
00:23:13what
00:23:13the best part is
00:23:14now I never have to see that stupid red jacket of yours again
00:23:29Charlie
00:23:31Charlie
00:23:31what
00:23:33the kangaroo got the money
00:23:38what are you talking about
00:23:39I put the money in the jacket
00:23:42and the jacket on the kangaroo
00:23:44and nothing happened away
00:23:49the kangaroo has money
00:23:54the kangaroo has
00:23:55Salvador Maggio's
00:23:56$50,000
00:23:59yeah
00:24:03come on
00:24:04come on
00:24:11who puts a jacket with $50,000 on a kangaroo
00:24:14a dead kangaroo
00:24:15a dead kangaroo
00:24:16he was dead
00:24:17Charlie
00:24:19you should have just let me drown
00:24:20Lewis
00:24:20I mean it
00:24:21when you had the chance
00:24:22you should have just let me drown
00:24:23but there he is
00:24:23there he is right there
00:24:26I see you now
00:24:27go go go go
00:24:29we got him
00:24:29we got him
00:24:30go go go
00:24:31look at that little fella go
00:24:32Charlie
00:24:33look at him go
00:24:44here we come baby
00:24:46oh we're gaining on him
00:24:47oh my god
00:24:48look at the fella move man
00:24:54I'm gonna pull up on your side
00:24:56and I want you to reach out
00:24:56and grab the money
00:24:57piece of cake
00:24:58see you want me to just open the door
00:24:59and lean out of the speeding car
00:25:01fine Charlie
00:25:01we'll just drive past him
00:25:02and hope he hops in the deep
00:25:06here I go
00:25:07okay
00:25:09okay
00:25:09there you go
00:25:10give me closer
00:25:11give me closer
00:25:12Charlie he's hopping like a rabbit
00:25:13closer
00:25:14give me a little closer
00:25:15I'm trying to get closer Charlie
00:25:17oh come on get it baby
00:25:19closer Lewis
00:25:19oh come on get the money Charlie
00:25:21a little closer Lewis
00:25:22I almost got it
00:25:24almost there
00:25:24come on Charlie
00:25:25I can't hold it
00:25:28get the money
00:25:34as it turns out this is hard
00:25:40what are these things
00:25:42they're termite mouths
00:25:43I read about them in the book
00:25:45careful Lewis
00:25:46you almost missed one
00:26:15I don't suppose you took the insurance
00:26:20my uncle always told me
00:26:21that was just a rip off
00:26:31don't worry Charlie
00:26:32we'll get the money back
00:26:33alright
00:26:34you can't go far
00:26:35it's a continent Lewis
00:26:37you can go very far
00:26:38I know it's a continent
00:26:39I read the book
00:26:41you happen to read the chapter
00:26:43on not putting your jacket
00:26:45on a wild animal
00:26:47no but I did read the chapter
00:26:48on how an aboriginal
00:26:49can kill a white man
00:26:50with a twig
00:26:51you want to see that one
00:26:58you want to see that one
00:27:05you want to see that one
00:27:07you want to see that one
00:27:11you want to see that one
00:27:11you want to see that one
00:27:11you want to see that one
00:27:11you want to see that one
00:27:12you want to see that one
00:27:12you want to see that one
00:27:12you want to see that one
00:27:13you want to see that one
00:27:14you want to see that one
00:27:14you want to see that one
00:27:14you want to see that one
00:27:16you want to see that one
00:27:26The old Allison.
00:27:28Come on, Lewis, I'll buy you a beer and we'll catch you in to the Knicks game.
00:27:34Two beers.
00:27:35Big beers.
00:27:36Hey, look here.
00:27:37I'm gonna call Mr. Smith, you know, let him know there's been a slight delay.
00:27:41Slight delay?
00:27:42Yeah, but we're working on it, all right?
00:27:44Give me his number.
00:27:48Hey, uh, where's your phone?
00:27:50I ran near the Donnie's.
00:27:51You guys have a Denny's?
00:27:53No, the Donnie.
00:27:55The Bog Choff.
00:27:56The Long Drop.
00:27:58The Thunderbox.
00:27:59You know what, um, I'm just gonna look for her by the bathroom.
00:28:02All right?
00:28:05Shh.
00:28:09Now, there's a yankster can drink.
00:28:13Any yankster can drink, it's all right with me.
00:28:17G'day.
00:28:18My name's Blue.
00:28:20Uh, Charlie.
00:28:21Nice to meet you, Chazza.
00:28:24Charlie.
00:28:25Like I said, Chazza.
00:28:28We're only two hours late.
00:28:30You should be a reasonable and understanding man.
00:28:35What?
00:28:36Uh, Mr. Smith.
00:28:37Uh, yeah, you might not know me, but, uh...
00:28:40Where are you, bludgeon?
00:28:42I'm out here in the back of Bullitt McCanker after me ears in heat stroke, waiting for you two yanks.
00:28:48Where's me package?
00:28:49Uh, it's been temporarily misplaced.
00:28:54I don't reckon you respect me very much.
00:28:56First you steal my package, and now you're on the phone razzin' me about it.
00:29:00We didn't steal your package, I swear!
00:29:02Look, we're gonna get it back!
00:29:04You'd be a banger short of a Barbie if you didn't.
00:29:06When I find ya...
00:29:07You'd better get ready to cough it up, otherwise I'll chop you into snags and feed you to the crocs.
00:29:13Mr. Smith!
00:29:14Have a nice day.
00:29:18One of me favorites.
00:29:28A kangaroo.
00:29:29A kangaroo.
00:29:30A kangaroo.
00:29:31Wildlife Foundation.
00:29:35Oh, Lewis, this is Blue.
00:29:38Blue, this is Lewis.
00:29:39Hello.
00:29:39Hey, Blue.
00:29:40What'd Mr. Smith say?
00:29:41He was nice.
00:29:42He was nice.
00:29:43Uh, said everything was cool.
00:29:44Really?
00:29:46He did say that we should, uh, do our best to get the package back.
00:29:49Ah, right.
00:29:50The package.
00:29:51Ah, the package!
00:29:53Uh, Charlie?
00:29:55Order me another drink.
00:29:56I got a plan.
00:30:02This just isn't my day.
00:30:04Oh, yeah.
00:30:11You mind leaving a little for the camels?
00:30:15You're American.
00:30:16And you're drinking water that comes from a stagnant pond.
00:30:19Oh.
00:30:20I'm from Brooklyn.
00:30:21I've had a lot worse.
00:30:22The name's Lewis.
00:30:24Name's Jesse.
00:30:25Oh, nice to meet you.
00:30:26Wanna give me a hand?
00:30:28Okay.
00:30:31Woo!
00:30:31No offense, but these are the ugliest rabbits I've ever seen.
00:30:35They're called bilbies, and they're almost extinct.
00:30:38In fact, it's up to these guys to repopulate the entire Devil's Marbles area.
00:30:43Somebody's gonna be having fun tonight.
00:30:46That's the plan.
00:30:47Looks like you're gonna need a couple more bilbies, though.
00:30:50Well, if the foundation I work for had more money.
00:30:54You mean the Wildlife Foundation?
00:30:56Mm-hmm.
00:30:56You work here?
00:30:58Yeah.
00:30:59Oh, thank you, Lord.
00:31:00This is great.
00:31:00Look, I need some help.
00:31:03You see, I put my lucky jacket on the back of a dead kangaroo who came to life and then
00:31:06hopped off with all my money.
00:31:08You do need help.
00:31:09No, no, no, no.
00:31:10I'm for real.
00:31:11Can you help me?
00:31:13Do you have any idea where he is?
00:31:16No.
00:31:16Well, it seems to me you need an airplane.
00:31:19You need a tranquilizer gun.
00:31:22You need a list.
00:31:23You need a pistol.
00:31:24You need a pistol.
00:31:29Let's go.
00:31:30Oh, no.
00:31:44Oh, no.
00:31:49No.
00:31:53Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on!
00:31:57Come on, come on!
00:31:59Come here.
00:32:04Give me one sec, guys.
00:32:06You've got to see this guy drink. He's unbelievable.
00:32:09Hey, I figured out how we're gonna catch that kangaroo.
00:32:11First we hit it with a car, now you want to blow its head off?
00:32:15No.
00:32:17This is a tranquilizer, Doc.
00:32:18It works in three stages.
00:32:21Stage one, temporary blindness.
00:32:23Stage two, partial paralysis.
00:32:25And stage three, complete shutdown of all molar skills.
00:32:28Totally humane.
00:32:30Sounds humane.
00:32:31I said it was temporary.
00:32:33Look, I walked to this wildlife office,
00:32:35and there's this American girl that works there,
00:32:36and she is...
00:32:38Ooh, bam, pow, just rub it.
00:32:40Ooh!
00:32:41Ooh!
00:32:42Ooh!
00:32:43Ooh!
00:32:45Ooh!
00:32:46Ooh!
00:32:47Ow!
00:32:47Ow!
00:32:48Pow!
00:32:49Epileptic?
00:32:50Her name is Jessie, and I told her the story.
00:32:52I even showed her a picture of the kangaroo.
00:32:54You told her the kangaroo has $50,000?
00:32:57I told her the kangaroo has $4,000.
00:32:59And our passports.
00:33:01Mm-hmm.
00:33:02Not bad.
00:33:02Yeah.
00:33:03She told me the best way to find a kangaroo is by air.
00:33:06What's that?
00:33:08A number two bush plane that we can hire.
00:33:10I like it.
00:33:11Let's go call!
00:33:12Ha, ha, ha, ha.
00:33:14God, God, God!
00:33:16God!
00:33:16Yeah!
00:33:18If I didn't know you better, I'd say this is a honey of a plan.
00:33:21Dang, skip it.
00:33:26Excuse me, mate.
00:33:27I'm going to appoint Percy at the porcelain.
00:33:33Gee.
00:33:33I almost made it.
00:33:35Hm.
00:33:39Violet's personal number.
00:33:57Louis?
00:33:58Mm-hmm.
00:34:00Do you have a back-up plan?
00:34:03Mm-mm.
00:34:06I sure hope the two pots of coffee and the Red Bull we gave him were enough.
00:34:10Hey, man.
00:34:11How you doing up there?
00:34:13Never better, mate.
00:34:14Why do you ask?
00:34:15No reason.
00:34:16It's just that you were passed out an hour ago.
00:34:19That's just me morning ritual, mate.
00:34:24I couldn't help but notice that this is the Flying Gingo 4.
00:34:28What happened to the 1, 2, and 3?
00:34:40Now use the word in a sentence.
00:34:44Amorphous.
00:34:44Having no definite form.
00:34:46Shapeless.
00:34:47As in, after Joey Clams got whacked, his head was amorphous.
00:34:53That was excellent.
00:34:54Now let's move to the next level.
00:34:56I think you should take this.
00:35:00Hello.
00:35:05I grieve to hear that, Mr. Smith.
00:35:09I don't know.
00:35:09Of course.
00:35:10We had a deal.
00:35:12Please, advise me if this situation changes.
00:35:16Hmm.
00:35:18Those two mommalukes didn't show.
00:35:21Our friend feels they pocketed the 50 Gs.
00:35:24Maybe they figured it out.
00:35:26My stepson couldn't figure out a cheese sandwich
00:35:28if they spotted him the pumpernickel and the provolone.
00:35:32So what do you want to do?
00:35:34You obsessive out a passport.
00:35:40I can't see anything from up here.
00:35:42Hey!
00:35:43Do you think you can take us down a little lower?
00:35:46Hang on to your knickers.
00:35:47We're going in.
00:35:51A little lower!
00:35:53A little lower!
00:35:56Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
00:35:57Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
00:35:59Oh!
00:35:59Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
00:36:01Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
00:36:05Could you please not do that again?
00:36:08Hey Charlie, look to the left!
00:36:11Kangaroos!
00:36:13They're kangaroos, all right.
00:36:14A lot of kangaroos.
00:36:17Not with a red jacket, though.
00:36:18You think it can be someplace else?
00:36:21Wait! Look! Look! It's Jacky Legs!
00:36:23There he is! That's him! That's him!
00:36:25I knew this would work!
00:36:27Blue, bring us around!
00:36:29Yeah, right!
00:36:34Get me there, Blue!
00:36:45Now get up right on his tail!
00:36:47And stay with him, no matter what!
00:36:49Wow.
00:36:51Hey!
00:36:52Say hello to my other friend!
00:36:54Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
00:36:56Woo!
00:36:56I've got you now, Jacky Legs.
00:36:59I'm gonna get you now.
00:37:02Ow!
00:37:03Whoa!
00:37:04Whoa!
00:37:06You hit him?
00:37:08I don't know. He's still hopping.
00:37:10Maybe it takes a little time for it to take a pack.
00:37:12Yeah. All right.
00:37:16Charlie?
00:37:20Oh, my God.
00:37:22Uh, mates?
00:37:23Yes?
00:37:24Got a bit of a wrinkle here.
00:37:26The old optics are on the fritz.
00:37:28Stage one.
00:37:30Sipperary blindness.
00:37:33Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
00:37:35Was that the engine?
00:37:37No.
00:37:37That was me.
00:37:38For some reason, I can't move me arms.
00:37:40Stage two.
00:37:42Pustial paralysis.
00:37:44Charlie, can you lean over here and take the stick?
00:37:47I can still work the foot pedals.
00:37:49Oh, God.
00:37:50Take the stick firmly in hand and...
00:37:53Oh!
00:37:55Whoa!
00:37:56Stage three.
00:37:57Total shutdown of motor skills.
00:38:00Oh!
00:38:01English, Blue.
00:38:02English!
00:38:03Stage four.
00:38:05Fire!
00:38:06Fire and crash!
00:38:08Fire and crash!
00:38:13Ah!
00:38:15Ah!
00:38:21Ah!
00:38:22Ah!
00:38:24Ah!
00:38:25Ah!
00:38:26Ah!
00:38:27Ah!
00:38:28Ah!
00:38:29Ah!
00:38:31Ah!
00:38:32Ah!
00:38:32Ah!
00:38:33Ah!
00:38:33Ah!
00:38:34Ah!
00:38:56You okay?
00:38:57Yeah.
00:38:58You sure?
00:38:58Yeah.
00:38:59Good.
00:39:00Because I'm going to beat you soft, Lewis.
00:39:02Like this is my fault?
00:39:03First rule of aviation, you never shoot the pilot.
00:39:06Assume crash positions.
00:39:08Blue, we already crashed.
00:39:12Ah, right.
00:39:14No worries then.
00:39:23Can I help you?
00:39:25Think some friends of mine passed through here?
00:39:28A couple of Yangs?
00:39:31Friends?
00:39:32Yeah.
00:39:33I promise the family back home I'll take care of them.
00:39:38Hello.
00:39:39Hello.
00:39:40Come on, you got to do something, man.
00:39:42Hey, hey, hey.
00:39:44Hello.
00:39:45Hello.
00:39:46Charlie, come on, man.
00:39:47We got to do something.
00:39:48What can we do?
00:39:49We have to sit here and hope this Santa Claus over there can fix the radio or someone comes
00:39:52looking for us.
00:39:54Actually, someone is looking for us.
00:40:00Mr. Smith.
00:40:03Lewis.
00:40:04He didn't say what I said he said.
00:40:07What did he say that you didn't say he said?
00:40:09He thinks we stole his package, man, so he's coming after us.
00:40:13And he mentioned this little thing about cutting us up into little bitty pieces and snacks
00:40:16for a crocodile.
00:40:17Then the phone went out, man, and I couldn't hear the rest of us.
00:40:18If Smith thinks that we stole his money, then by now Sal thinks that we stole his money.
00:40:21Hey, man, Sal's not going to hurt us.
00:40:23He's married to your mother.
00:40:25If Sal Maggio thinks we stole his money, he'll kill us in front of my mother.
00:40:28Then make her clean it up.
00:40:30All we have to do is find the money before Mr. Smith finds us.
00:40:33And everything is okay.
00:40:34I see.
00:40:34So what you're saying is that we should find the money?
00:40:37Yes.
00:40:37How, Lewis?
00:40:38How?
00:40:39How are we going to catch a kangaroo on foot?
00:40:46Got it.
00:40:48You ever heard of Devil's Marbles?
00:40:50Due East.
00:40:51Bit of a walk, though.
00:40:52Why?
00:40:53What's there?
00:40:54The lady I told you about at the wildlife office.
00:40:56The epileptic?
00:40:57Yes.
00:40:58She works with animals, and I bet you anything she can help us catch Jackie Legs.
00:41:01Oh, please.
00:41:02Charlie.
00:41:03It's better than being cut up into little bitty pieces, man.
00:41:06Not if you go first and I get to watch.
00:41:10Look, you blacks go ahead.
00:41:11I'll fix somebody.
00:41:12I'll be right with you.
00:41:14Which way is East, man?
00:41:16Uh, no way.
00:41:18Let's go, man.
00:41:19No, no, no, no.
00:41:20Wait there.
00:41:21That way.
00:41:24Charlie?
00:41:26Charlie?
00:41:26Uh-huh?
00:41:27I'm worried about waffles.
00:41:29Do you think she'll be okay with Sal?
00:41:31Oh, sure.
00:41:32As long as she doesn't dig up any bodies in the backyard, she should be just fine.
00:41:38Good.
00:41:38Good.
00:41:40How far did Blue say this place was?
00:41:43He didn't.
00:41:44He just said it was due east.
00:41:46So is Brooklyn.
00:41:48Oh.
00:41:55You're the guide?
00:41:56Yes, sir.
00:41:57My name's Mr. Jimmy.
00:41:59First-rate expert outback guide.
00:42:01You'd be most happy with me.
00:42:04Can't frickin' start.
00:42:06Hey, uh, listen, you know where we can get some guns around here?
00:42:10No worries.
00:42:11You boys hunters.
00:42:13Yeah.
00:42:14Hunters.
00:42:17I think I just sweated out a bottle of Yoo-Hoo I drank in the eighth grade.
00:42:22Shh, shh, shh.
00:42:23Let me go.
00:42:24What?
00:42:25Dingo's.
00:42:28Hey, that one kinda looks like Waffles.
00:42:30Yeah, Waffles had a crazed look in his eye and his face caked in blood.
00:42:34Charlie?
00:42:36Why are they staring at me like that?
00:42:39Because I'm a green leaf salad and you're the all-you-can-eat buffet.
00:42:45Hey, Charlie, you gotta help me out, man.
00:42:46They gon' get me like they got that baby.
00:42:50Whoa.
00:42:51Feel that?
00:42:52Wind suddenly picked up.
00:42:53It's like all of a sudden the air conditioner's fixed.
00:42:57Charlie, where the Dingo's going?
00:42:59I think something bad is about to happen here, Lewis.
00:43:02Oh, hey, Charlie.
00:43:04Look.
00:43:06Ah!
00:43:07This feels good!
00:43:08I feel like I can fly!
00:43:10Lewis!
00:43:11Ah!
00:43:12I'm Lewis!
00:43:14Lewis!
00:43:18I want to go back to Brooklyn!
00:43:22Oh!
00:43:23Come in, Tansy.
00:43:24Over.
00:43:25Read you.
00:43:26Over.
00:43:27Boy, am I glad to hear you.
00:43:29Listen, I've crashed me plane.
00:43:31Can you send some help?
00:43:32Your location?
00:43:33Over.
00:43:34It's, uh, west of the Simpson and, uh, just south of Kings Canyon.
00:43:42Tansy?
00:43:43You read me, Tansy?
00:43:44Who?
00:43:46Tansy?
00:43:49Do you read me?
00:43:52Must have been some kind of freak sandstorm.
00:43:55Think so?
00:43:56I think you need to eat.
00:43:59Your blood sugar's getting low.
00:44:01Stop it, Lewis, okay?
00:44:03Please, just stop it.
00:44:05You know what I could really go for right about now?
00:44:08Some Roscoe's chicken and waffles.
00:44:10The side of grits and the side of gravy.
00:44:13I love listening to you.
00:44:15Oh!
00:44:15What better you had one of those ice mocha schmocha things from Starbucks.
00:44:20They're so cold and creamy.
00:44:24My God.
00:44:35Can you believe this?
00:44:37Can you believe our luck?
00:44:38Oh!
00:44:39What are the chances?
00:44:43It's a miracle!
00:44:47Oh, yeah!
00:44:55Dudes!
00:45:03Hey, Lewis.
00:45:04What are you waiting for?
00:45:07Come on, hop in.
00:45:11Hey, look.
00:45:13They got Slurpees.
00:45:15Oh, Charlie.
00:45:21Brain freeze!
00:45:26It seems so real.
00:45:30That's why they call it a mirage.
00:45:32At least you got to have fun for a few minutes.
00:45:35Yeah.
00:45:36Because my brain is frying and I'm losing contact with reality.
00:45:40You don't understand this because this is how you usually function.
00:45:46That was uncalled for, Charlie.
00:45:49Was it?
00:45:51Every decision you make, Lewis, is a disaster.
00:45:54That's right, Charlie.
00:45:55Just blame me.
00:45:57That way you relieve yourself of all responsibility.
00:46:00But let me tell you something.
00:46:02It's easier to mock than to do.
00:46:05And you do nothing.
00:46:06You just complain and whine like a woman.
00:46:10You want to see me do something?
00:46:12Oh!
00:46:13Bring it on, Queen of the Desert!
00:46:36Lewis.
00:46:37Lewis, wait a second.
00:46:39I'm having another one of those mirages.
00:46:41And this one's a beauty.
00:46:44Sexy!
00:46:46Arts!
00:46:49I love this child.
00:46:51Hold on!
00:46:53Hey, sexy lady!
00:46:56Charlie!
00:46:59Shh!
00:47:00Lewis, please.
00:47:01Let me just enjoy this.
00:47:03Huh.
00:47:18How you doing?
00:47:20Good.
00:47:21You?
00:47:22Good.
00:47:35They feel...
00:47:37so real.
00:47:53It's you.
00:47:54Yeah, it's me.
00:47:56Love the jacket, Charlie.
00:47:57It's hard to get something that fits my shoulders.
00:47:59Nice!
00:48:01How'd you know red was my favourite colour?
00:48:03You can talk.
00:48:05And I can sing.
00:48:06I said a hit.
00:48:07Hot!
00:48:07The hippie.
00:48:08The hippie to the hip hip hop.
00:48:10And you don't stop.
00:48:10The rock to the bang bang.
00:48:12Boogie set up.
00:48:12Jump.
00:48:13The boogie to the rear of the murther.
00:48:14The boogie to the boogie.
00:48:14This is great!
00:48:15So I am Jackie Legs.
00:48:17And I'd like to say hello to the black to the white.
00:48:20Jackie.
00:48:22Mr. Legs.
00:48:23If you could find your way clear to give me back my money.
00:48:27Money?
00:48:28Oh, you mean that money.
00:48:33Stop that!
00:48:34Stop that!
00:48:35Yahoo!
00:48:36Stop that!
00:48:37Hey!
00:48:37Stop that!
00:48:38Please!
00:48:39If Sal finds out...
00:48:40If I find out what, Charlie, that you lost my money...
00:48:45Sal?
00:48:46I asked you to do something for me.
00:48:48This is not that.
00:48:49It wasn't my fault.
00:48:50It was Louis.
00:48:51Say what?
00:48:52My fault?
00:48:53That's how you pay me back after I saved your life?
00:48:55Louis?
00:48:56Next time you're drowning in the ocean...
00:48:58Call Free Willy!
00:49:00Let Willy set you free!
00:49:02You know what, sir?
00:49:04You were right about him.
00:49:05Chicken blood.
00:49:06Smell it on his father.
00:49:08Smell it on him.
00:49:09Chicken blood.
00:49:10Oi!
00:49:11Chicken blood!
00:49:12Chicken blood!
00:49:13Chicken blood!
00:49:14Chicken blood!
00:49:14Chicken blood!
00:49:24Here.
00:49:26Drink this.
00:49:27It'll bring down the swelling.
00:49:31Unfortunately, it'll also make your testicles fall off.
00:49:38I'm kidding.
00:49:42It won't bring down the swelling.
00:50:01That bloody time.
00:50:07Where are they?
00:50:09Piss off!
00:50:11Fifteen years.
00:50:12Fifteen years.
00:50:12Special air services.
00:50:13Behind the line.
00:50:14I've done it hard, mate.
00:50:16Forgot more than you ever learned.
00:50:17You'll get nothing from me.
00:50:20Devil's marbles.
00:50:21Took off on foot.
00:50:22About ten hours ago.
00:50:24See, that wasn't so difficult.
00:50:34Knock knock.
00:50:35Knock knock.
00:50:36Very funny.
00:50:38Can't be too careful.
00:50:40Yeah.
00:50:41I'm sorry about that.
00:50:42I didn't think they were real.
00:50:45Oh, no.
00:50:45I mean, I thought they were real.
00:50:47I just didn't think you...
00:50:48Relax.
00:50:48I know what you mean.
00:50:49Lewis, explain.
00:50:52Listen.
00:50:53Lewis and I have a little problem.
00:50:55And I already told him.
00:50:56I can't help you find your rue.
00:50:58I've got to get back to Alice Springs.
00:50:59Sorry.
00:51:02That's okay.
00:51:03I understand.
00:51:10What?
00:51:11Look.
00:51:13Lewis told me you need some money to help repopulate the earth with your rabbits.
00:51:17Bilby's.
00:51:19Bilby's.
00:51:21How about this?
00:51:22We give you $2,000.
00:51:25You help us get our stuff back.
00:51:27$2,000?
00:51:29Strictly business.
00:51:30No strings attached.
00:51:31What do you say?
00:51:31We got a deal?
00:51:32Deal.
00:51:33Great.
00:51:34Hustle makes it happen.
00:51:36Let's get moving.
00:51:37Now?
00:51:37You see, our passports are just about to expire.
00:51:41Nine of the ten most poisonous snakes in the world live in Australia.
00:51:45And they all come out at night.
00:51:48How do you feel about a morning start?
00:51:57Doesn't get any better than this, Lewis.
00:52:00Blue skies.
00:52:01Fresh air.
00:52:01And who even knew there were camels in Australia?
00:52:04These are noble beasts, my friend.
00:52:07Proud.
00:52:08Majestic.
00:52:10Oh, come on.
00:52:12Oh, oh.
00:52:12Get used to it, boys.
00:52:14Camels do that.
00:52:17I don't want to seem nosy, but do you have some sort of plan here?
00:52:20There hasn't been rain for weeks, right?
00:52:24Oh, God.
00:52:25Come on.
00:52:26Oh, God.
00:52:27Well, when the water dries up in the basins, the kangaroos head for the rivers.
00:52:32Oh.
00:52:32Oh.
00:52:33So that means we have two choices, the Fink River or the Todd.
00:52:36And since the Fink is 200 miles away, I'm leaning toward the Todd.
00:52:40All righty, then.
00:52:41To the Todd.
00:52:42To the Todd.
00:52:43To the Todd.
00:52:45Lewis, what are you eating?
00:52:46I picked a bunch of berries when we were at camp, man.
00:52:49Jessie said they were cool.
00:52:50They smell just like a bowl of fruity pebbles right before you add the milk.
00:52:54Come on, take a whiff.
00:52:55No, thank you.
00:52:57Okay.
00:53:02Give me some of those berries.
00:53:03Come on, quick.
00:53:04Give me some of these.
00:53:08Man, these do smell pretty good.
00:53:11Chicks in New York, they pay big money to smell like that, right?
00:53:14They're called snake skin liberries.
00:53:16Set.
00:53:17Impressive.
00:53:18How long you been in Australia?
00:53:19I moved here with a friend from Milwaukee three years ago for a semester abroad.
00:53:23I never went back.
00:53:24Milwaukee!
00:53:25You know, I once had a...
00:53:28Oh!
00:53:29Oh!
00:53:31What is with these camels?
00:53:34That one was me.
00:53:38I swear to God we passed that same bush two hours ago.
00:53:42What is going on?
00:53:44Well, it says here.
00:53:45What, again with the map?
00:53:47Hey, why'd you sit on your hat and try thinking with your butt?
00:53:49Hey, Frankie, look.
00:53:52Maybe this hump can tell us where we are.
00:53:56How you doing?
00:53:58Got trained to the neck, crashed me plane, rescue party, knocked me out and left me to die.
00:54:02All because of the bloody boom.
00:54:04Yeah.
00:54:06We're looking for Alice Springs, you know?
00:54:09It isn't straightforward, mate.
00:54:11What about a lift?
00:54:12Why not?
00:54:13Get in.
00:54:14I'll be.
00:54:19So what do you think?
00:54:21Oh.
00:54:22Now when do the kangaroos come here?
00:54:25Come on.
00:54:28This looks like a good spot.
00:54:29If there's a kangaroo within 500 miles, he'll show up here eventually.
00:54:34So when our guy shows up, how are we going to catch you?
00:54:37You know what?
00:54:38I've been thinking about that.
00:54:42You ever turn a ball?
00:54:45What?
00:54:45What?
00:54:46Round, round, baby.
00:54:47Round, round.
00:54:48Sending that on me.
00:54:50I don't need no man.
00:54:52Got my kicks for free.
00:54:54Oh, that's good.
00:54:55I'm gonna be down low.
00:54:57I don't need nobody but my honey's gonna go round, baby.
00:55:02Round, round.
00:55:03Sending that on me.
00:55:05I don't need no man.
00:55:07Got my kicks for free.
00:55:09If you hate me, I will show you.
00:55:12How to bring me into something new.
00:55:16If you want me, run away now.
00:55:20If you stop me, then I'll hit the ground.
00:55:27Round, round, baby.
00:55:29Round, round.
00:55:30Sending that on me.
00:55:32I don't need no man.
00:55:33Yo, what's a boomer?
00:55:36What?
00:55:37A boomer.
00:55:37Oh, kangaroo.
00:55:39Those two of you folks, Americans.
00:55:41They were chasing after his kangaroo in a red, shiny jacket.
00:55:46Don't that Doc Lewis Booker always wear a shiny red jacket?
00:55:49Yeah.
00:55:50Yeah.
00:56:05Never should have left the pub.
00:56:09Oh, yes.
00:56:10Oh, yeah.
00:56:11Is this an Olympic event?
00:56:12Because I am Bolo Man.
00:56:13I am Bolo Man!
00:56:15Bingo.
00:56:16Bingo?
00:56:17Where?
00:56:17No, no, no, no, no.
00:56:18Bingo.
00:56:18Look.
00:56:19Nice call, Jessie.
00:56:20So that's Jackie Legs.
00:56:21Ah, kangaroo jack in the flesh.
00:56:23Hey, hey, hey.
00:56:24You can't get him like that.
00:56:25He'll just take off running.
00:56:26So what do we do?
00:56:28We have to disguise ourselves.
00:56:30Get rid of our human scent.
00:56:32And how are we gonna do that?
00:56:41We need to get a little closer.
00:56:43Now the only time we move is when he's feeding.
00:56:47This is very important.
00:56:49And don't make any sudden movements or sounds.
00:56:52Okay.
00:56:53Got it.
00:56:55There he goes.
00:57:05Oh shit.
00:57:08Oh shit.
00:57:10Oh shit.
00:57:11What is your problem?
00:57:12Man, I got a family of ants crawling up my leg.
00:57:15Just ignore them.
00:57:16I thought she said no sudden movements.
00:57:17Boys.
00:57:18Boys.
00:57:19Oh.
00:57:19Hello?
00:57:22We're close enough.
00:57:23Spread out.
00:57:25Charlie.
00:57:27I'm having a picnic in my shorts.
00:57:29And I brought the sweets.
00:57:30Lewis, just keep it together.
00:57:32Okay.
00:57:33Keep together, Lewis.
00:57:36Keep together.
00:57:38Keep together.
00:57:55Charlie, I can't take it over.
00:57:57Oh, God.
00:57:59Oh, she's...
00:58:00Oh, she's...
00:58:01Oh, she's...
00:58:01Oh, get off...
00:58:05Get off me.
00:58:06Get off me.
00:58:06Oh, I'm gonna roll in the grass.
00:58:08This is great.
00:58:09This is just great.
00:58:10Now what are we gonna do?
00:58:11Well, there's no more we can do today.
00:58:13We'll just have to wait.
00:58:14I have a pretty good idea where they'll be tomorrow.
00:58:16Tomorrow?
00:58:17No, no, no.
00:58:17This has got to happen today.
00:58:19We'll pitch camp here.
00:58:20I'll get the firewall.
00:58:22Oh, God.
00:58:24Wow.
00:58:25They saw about that, man.
00:58:27I was under attack.
00:58:28That's all right.
00:58:29Look at her.
00:58:29She thinks she's so much smarter than us.
00:58:32I'm pretty sure she is, Charlie.
00:58:35Let me ask you something, Mr. Jimmy.
00:58:38Where do I go if I'm looking for a missing kangaroo?
00:58:43The sky is dry for many months.
00:58:46Wind is quiet from the...
00:58:48Kangaroos, Jim!
00:58:49Where are they?
00:58:51Well, the best bet's right here.
00:58:53Owen Springs.
00:58:56Yeah.
00:59:01Yeah.
00:59:27What are you doing?
00:59:28What?
00:59:29Jesse!
00:59:30I was going to take a bath.
00:59:32Go!
00:59:35Yes!
00:59:36No.
00:59:36Look, I'm hot, I'm filthy, and I want to take a bath.
00:59:40You can stay, you can go.
00:59:41It makes no difference to me.
00:59:43Well, I'm not leaving.
00:59:44I was here first.
00:59:45Suit yourself.
00:59:55Woo!
00:59:58Ha-ha!
00:59:59It's gorgeous!
01:00:03Hey!
01:00:04What are you looking at?
01:00:05Well, you look first.
01:00:07Well, yeah, I look.
01:00:09So I look too, alright?
01:00:13Come near me, I'll kill you.
01:00:15So nervous.
01:00:17You have absolutely no effect on me.
01:00:20No?
01:00:20No.
01:00:21You think you do.
01:00:23Just stating the obvious.
01:00:25You are so not even my type.
01:00:26You could kiss me right now and it would make the slightest...
01:00:34Difference.
01:00:36Nothing?
01:00:37No.
01:00:38Sorry.
01:00:39Hey, well, I hate to break it to you, honey, but that kiss did absolutely nothing for me
01:00:43either.
01:00:44Well, I'm not surprised if that's the best you can kiss.
01:00:47Oh!
01:00:47You want to see the best I can kiss?
01:00:49As a matter of fact, I...
01:00:57See?
01:01:00Nothing.
01:01:01Same here.
01:01:02Nothing.
01:01:03Really?
01:01:05Alright.
01:01:07I'll admit it.
01:01:09This is the most sensual, romantic moment of my entire life.
01:01:22And now it's over.
01:01:25Woo!
01:01:38Hey, guys.
01:01:40I think it's time to get up.
01:01:42Yes.
01:01:44What's going on?
01:01:46We're in a little bit of trouble.
01:01:48A little?
01:01:49I've been following camel tracks all bloody morning, so let's make short work of this.
01:01:55Where's me mola?
01:01:56For God's sakes, all this is over $4,000?
01:02:03It's more, isn't it?
01:02:06How much more?
01:02:08$46,000 more.
01:02:10And every cent of it's mine.
01:02:12Now, there are two ways of doing this, and one of them is a lot less painful than the other.
01:02:19Where's the money?
01:02:22See, what had happened was?
01:02:24We was driving, and then, you know, we hit this kangaroo, and I was wearing my lucky jacket, so...
01:02:27Wrong answer.
01:02:28Your mate Blue told us that yarn about the boomer.
01:02:33Mate, I hope for your sake you were stupid enough to hide that money in them saddlebags.
01:02:39You gotta believe us.
01:02:40Nah, you gotta believe me.
01:02:42But ain't there, I'm gonna carve you up piece by piece.
01:02:50So it's safe to assume you're not on vacation.
01:02:53No.
01:02:55Charlie's stepfather's a mobster back in New York, and he had us sent here to deliver a package.
01:02:58Oh, and you got me into the middle of this?
01:03:00I'm so sorry, Jessie. I never thought this would happen.
01:03:03You lied to me.
01:03:09What do you know?
01:03:12Bad news, fellas, you were telling the truth.
01:03:14Jack, who wants to go first?
01:03:20We can find your money. If you kill us now, you'll never get it.
01:03:24I'm a listener.
01:03:25I know a feeding ground near Owen Springs.
01:03:28The eucalyptus grove a few kilometers from here, that's where they'll be.
01:03:35I'll take the sheila and ride ahead.
01:03:38Jessie.
01:03:39Come on.
01:03:40I didn't do it for you.
01:03:44Listen up.
01:03:46Once we're out of sight, I want you to take our friends here out to Kings Canyon.
01:03:51You know what to do with them, but don't go back.
01:03:54Make it look natural.
01:03:55Two yanks tragically carking it, and I'm apologetic out back.
01:04:04We're going in the wrong direction.
01:04:08They're gonna kill us, Charlie.
01:04:09God only knows what they're gonna do to Jessie.
01:04:12I should've stopped this 20 years ago.
01:04:16What are you talking about?
01:04:17The first time Sal came to my mother's house, I knew he was no good.
01:04:20But he bought me this first baseman's mitt, that Don Mattingly model.
01:04:23Oh, that was a great myth.
01:04:25I still feel bad about losing him.
01:04:27When he left, my mom asked me what I thought of him.
01:04:29And I said, ah, I like him.
01:04:31I should've stood up to him that day and thrown him out of my house.
01:04:35Charlie, you were 10.
01:04:37Sal was right, Lewis.
01:04:38I got chicken blood.
01:04:40Had it my whole life.
01:04:45But that stops right now.
01:04:48Lewis, reach into my pants.
01:04:50Oh, Charlie, don't do this.
01:04:52Go out like a man.
01:04:53We all have urges.
01:04:55I remember this one time.
01:04:57There was this well-built Latino...
01:04:59Lewis, my scissors.
01:05:00Reach into my pants and get my scissors.
01:05:03Okay.
01:05:06Okay, Lewis.
01:05:08Are you ready to go?
01:05:10You bet.
01:05:14You think you can distract him?
01:05:16You mean, make him watch this hand instead of this one?
01:05:20Piece of cake.
01:05:22All right.
01:05:23Freeze, sucker!
01:05:26Get your hands up and turn slowly.
01:05:34I'm warning you.
01:05:36In 1983, I was the starting pitcher in the Little League World Series.
01:05:42I struck out 16 Taiwanese All-Stars.
01:05:45To this day, the people of Asia call me Sung Luk Dong,
01:05:50which means big black man, pretending to be 12.
01:05:59I don't know.
01:05:59My name's Carbone, which means skinny white boy with the gun.
01:06:03Good work, Sung Luk Dong.
01:06:09Now let's turn these camels around.
01:06:22When we fun from the city, I brought a 소리� путеше.
01:06:24Although he goes to everyone who works,
01:06:25All right.
01:06:35No one wants to try to fly or she gets to get away.
01:06:37No one wants to see.
01:06:59I said they'd be here.
01:07:01I'm trying to put a swifty on me, and I don't have much like that.
01:07:04There's also an area further along.
01:07:07I'm tired of you howling.
01:07:11What in bloody?
01:07:14Change of plan, Smith.
01:07:19Come on, you two. Let's go. Let's go. Come on.
01:07:24Jesse, come here.
01:07:26Easy, darling.
01:07:27Drop the knife, Smith.
01:07:32You ever held a gun before, Charlie?
01:07:36Don't answer that.
01:07:38No.
01:07:41You ever killed a man, Charlie?
01:07:43Don't answer that.
01:07:45No.
01:07:47What do you do for a living that makes you so brave, Charlie?
01:07:51Really don't answer that.
01:07:57I'm a hairdresser.
01:07:58Now drop the knife.
01:08:02Come here, Jesse.
01:08:03Mm-hmm.
01:08:03Yeah, we bad.
01:08:07If you think you're off the hook just because you came back for me.
01:08:10Never crossed my mind.
01:08:15You better hope that's someone coming to rescue you.
01:08:21Frankie.
01:08:23What are you doing here?
01:08:24Sal heard you were having a bit of trouble, so he sent us to help you out.
01:08:27Who the hell are you?
01:08:28Frank Lombardo.
01:08:30I represent the interest of Salvatore Marzio.
01:08:33You must be Smith.
01:08:35You're not wrong.
01:08:38What's going on here, huh?
01:08:39These guys were trying to kill us.
01:08:41Looks like we got here just in time.
01:08:46You did good, kid.
01:08:48Now put that gun down before you hurt yourself.
01:08:50All right.
01:08:55That's cool.
01:08:57Wow, Frankie.
01:08:59I never thought I'd be happy to see you.
01:09:02Hmm.
01:09:04Oh, Frankie, this is Jesse.
01:09:06Jesse, this is Frankie.
01:09:08Yeah.
01:09:09Hi.
01:09:09You see, Louis and I, we fell a little behind schedule.
01:09:14Yeah, yeah, and so, you know, Jesse, she came along to help us get back on schedule again.
01:09:17And so, you know, you didn't, uh-oh.
01:09:20I know all about it, Charlie.
01:09:24So you know about Jackie Legs?
01:09:26From Kenassie?
01:09:28He's involved in this?
01:09:30No, you guys are so sneaky and clever, I didn't know.
01:09:33Hurricanes leave smaller trails than you two morons.
01:09:40Sal's very disappointed to hear you lost that money.
01:09:46We'll get the money back.
01:09:47It's too late for that, Charlie.
01:09:50This time you screwed up big.
01:09:51Final straw big.
01:09:53Enough of the claptrap.
01:09:54That money's mine.
01:09:56Zip the lip, Dundee.
01:09:58We had a contract, and it didn't involve no bloody rude.
01:10:01Hey.
01:10:03I had to come all the way down here to the sphincter of the galaxy
01:10:07to straighten out this puked-up furball of a mess.
01:10:10Do not agitate me.
01:10:12We had a contract.
01:10:13Do not agitate me.
01:10:32Come on, let's get out of here.
01:10:37Jesse, get as far away from here as you can.
01:10:40They're not after you.
01:10:41I wish we got to get the money.
01:10:43It's our only chance.
01:10:44We drive the ruin to the canyon.
01:10:45We can corner them there.
01:10:46We?
01:10:47We did have a deal.
01:10:50Get out of here.
01:11:00Enough!
01:11:04Contract terminated.
01:11:06Get in the car.
01:11:11There he goes!
01:11:13Turn him into the canyon!
01:11:22Frankie!
01:11:38Come on!
01:11:40We got him!
01:11:52Shoot it, damn you, Eddie!
01:11:56I could have stayed in Brooklyn for this!
01:12:01Come on, baby!
01:12:07Hold on!
01:12:15I hate this country like a sickness!
01:12:19Ah!
01:12:20Not me!
01:12:21Them!
01:12:22Oh!
01:12:23My bad.
01:12:27There, ranch!
01:12:29Get the dumb thing out of my face!
01:12:30I got him!
01:12:33Watch your head!
01:12:35Watch out!
01:12:36For what?
01:12:37Oh!
01:12:39Oh, man.
01:12:46Tight fit!
01:12:47Ah, crap!
01:13:15Oh, my God.
01:13:20Lewis!
01:13:21Watch out!
01:13:24Lewis, no!
01:13:26Stay still, Jackie Legs!
01:13:30I got it! I got it!
01:13:33I got the money!
01:13:34Lewis!
01:13:42Lewis!
01:13:44Hurry, Charlie!
01:13:47I got it!
01:13:51Charlie!
01:13:53Lewis, grab my hand.
01:13:55Lewis!
01:13:58I got it!
01:14:00Charlie!
01:14:01Hold on, Lewis.
01:14:04Give me your belt. Give me your belt.
01:14:06You're gonna be all right.
01:14:07Charlie!
01:14:08Grab that rope. Grab that rope!
01:14:10Help me!
01:14:11Charlie, help me!
01:14:17Charlie!
01:14:20Grab the belt, Lewis.
01:14:25I can't beat you, Charlie!
01:14:26What?
01:14:27Grab the damned belt!
01:14:31It's now or never, Lewis!
01:14:34Ah!
01:14:40Oh!
01:14:40Help me out!
01:14:41Lewis!
01:14:44You have really got to cut back on the pie!
01:14:47Don't you let me go, Charlie!
01:14:50Don't you let me go!
01:14:51All right, go, go, go!
01:14:53Up, up, up!
01:14:55Jesse, a little more!
01:14:56Come on, Lewis! Jesse, a little more!
01:14:58Come on!
01:14:59Oh!
01:15:01John!
01:15:02I'm slipping!
01:15:04Ow!
01:15:04Stop!
01:15:06Stop!
01:15:08Whoa!
01:15:10Whoa!
01:15:12Whoa!
01:15:15Whoa!
01:15:15Whoa!
01:15:15Whoa!
01:15:16I'm gonna name my first son after you.
01:15:19Crazy-ass white boy.
01:15:23Whoa!
01:15:24Whoa!
01:15:26Whoa!
01:15:27Whoa!
01:15:29Let go of me!
01:15:31Ugh!
01:15:32Let go of me!
01:15:33Ugh!
01:15:36This is from Sal Marzio.
01:15:38Frankie, we got the money back.
01:15:39We got it back.
01:15:42We got it!
01:15:44You don't get it, do you, Charlie?
01:15:47Sal's not disappointed because he cares about the money.
01:15:49He's disappointed because you two aren't dead.
01:15:54What do you think he was paying Smith 50 grand for?
01:16:01You mean we traveled halfway across the world to pay for our own execution?
01:16:05Yeah.
01:16:06You two guys were the bag men for your own hit.
01:16:09Pretty clever, eh?
01:16:11Not on our part.
01:16:13Say good night.
01:16:16All right.
01:16:17All right.
01:16:19All right.
01:16:19All right.
01:16:23All right.
01:16:24This is Senior Sergeant Jimmy Icamala.
01:16:26Australian Police.
01:16:27Mr. Jimmy?
01:16:28Drop your weapon and place your hands in.
01:16:43Hey, Frankie!
01:16:45Go long!
01:17:01I am Bolo Man.
01:17:02That's what I'm talking about.
01:17:09yes mr smith was one of our most notorious contract killers we got a tip from the fbi
01:17:14that he was somehow involved with the maggio family yeah and when frankie lombardo called
01:17:19looking for a guide i was waiting i'm just glad i made it in time you pansy ass retards are
01:17:26dead
01:17:26you hear me dead i slaughter you like veal i wear your eyeballs like jewelry i've always
01:17:32found the brooklyn vernacular fascinating quite colorful really hey frankie can i have your
01:17:41yankees tickets there you are they were full they're radioing alice springs to send another
01:17:55chopper for us what's up man charlie something really important happened here today
01:18:10you saved my life yeah i know so now we're even exactly you don't owe me anymore you're rid of
01:18:19me
01:18:19what are you talking about i'm rid of you come on charlie guilt was the glue that held this
01:18:24friendship together you never needed me you're wrong lewis i've always needed you
01:18:34you know when you call me up and you're like yo charlie you gotta help me drive some greyhounds up
01:18:39from florida and i make out like i'm doing you this big favor truth is you're doing me the favor
01:18:47every story in my life worth telling starts with the words lewis and i
01:18:58you think we're friends because you saved my life once
01:19:06you save my life every day lewis
01:19:20uh guys you hold on a second we're having a very intimate non-gay moment take a look
01:19:36hey what are you doing hello jackie legs
01:19:47here you go boy huh here you go yeah that's a boy good boy
01:19:56oh here you are hey there little guy yeah there you go it's okay it's okay let me just grab
01:20:09this
01:20:10there you are good boy there you go
01:20:32so long jackie legs
01:20:40hey would you look at that lewis your lucky jacket
01:20:44i don't think so whoa whoa whoa whoa hear me out
01:20:47if you hadn't put the money in the jacket then the jacket on the kangaroo we would have delivered
01:20:51the money to smith and he would have killed us your lucky jacket
01:20:57get my jacket man i said i told you this was like didn't i tell you this was my lucky
01:21:00jacket
01:21:06look lewis he's back and he's got a family
01:21:15hey you must be jackie jr you're a cute little guy aren't you
01:21:26oh my god are you all right
01:21:35so that's my story well not quite frankie and his goons were put away for good
01:21:41as for sal he used all his high level connections to avoid going to prison
01:21:46and you know what it wasn't enough jesse she ended up marrying some filthy rich tycoon
01:21:55hey honey
01:21:57hi honey yep the filthy rich dude that's me lewis and i used the 50 grand to start up money
01:22:04and now snakeskin lily berry shampoo is the biggest thing in hair care since beat al sassoon
01:22:09got the latest numbers and from europe think you're gonna like them i love numbers
01:22:14hey partner i got the new numbers
01:22:19partner
01:22:21partner
01:22:21look up for you
01:22:36just trying my newest idea waterproof moose
01:22:40how you like it
01:22:45so that's me charlie carbone the one with the beautiful girl all the money i could ever want
01:22:51and my best friend lewis who saved my life more times than he'll ever know
01:23:01i'm gonna soak up the sun i'm gonna tell everyone to light it
01:23:11wait a minute the movie's called kangaroo jack it should end with me i'm a serious classically
01:23:19trained actor i can sing i can dance and i can jump out of the way of explosions
01:23:24ah oh yep no that's gonna leave a mark and i can do impersonations
01:23:28come on people throw me a freaking bone i have a son
01:23:33i shall call him mini roo
01:23:36now that should be the way you end a film with the star
01:23:40someone call my agent
01:23:44that's all blokes
01:23:48i'm gonna soak up the sun
01:23:52okay
01:23:53so the leaders of the caballeros
01:23:54say ladies and gentlemen
01:23:55maddie dama and dad and hey baby from the 17s
01:23:59okay put your hands up in the air
01:24:01be a hand in the air
01:24:02on everybody sing now
01:24:04hey baby
01:24:11i wanna know
01:24:15if you'll be my girl
01:24:20hey hey baby
01:24:24i wanna know
01:24:29if you'll be my girl
01:24:34when i saw you walking down the street
01:24:38i thought that's the kind of girl i like to meet
01:24:41she's so pretty
01:24:43look just fine
01:24:45i'm gonna make her mine all mine
01:24:48hey hey baby
01:24:54i wanna know
01:25:02i wanna know
01:25:03when you turn and walk away
01:25:06that's when i want to say
01:25:09come on baby give me a world
01:25:13i wanna know
01:25:15i wanna know
01:25:16when you turn and walk away
01:25:20that's when i want to say
01:25:23come on baby give me a world
01:25:27i wanna know
01:25:29if you'll be my girl
01:25:31hey hey baby
01:25:35who
01:25:36i
01:25:37i wanna know
01:25:40if you'll be my girl
01:25:42and now
01:25:43and now
01:25:43for the time
01:25:44hey hey baby
01:25:49who
01:25:50who
01:25:51who
01:25:51who
01:25:51who
01:25:51who
01:25:51who
01:25:51who
01:25:52who
01:25:52who
01:25:52who
01:25:53who
01:25:54You'll be my girl
01:26:00Hey, hey, baby
01:26:04I want to know
01:26:07You'll be my girl
01:26:46You'll be my girl
01:27:21You'll be my girl
01:27:51You'll be my girl
01:28:22You'll be my girl
01:28:47You'll be my girl
01:29:01You'll be my girl
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