- 2 days ago
Los Tres Badasses Que Me Quieren en Español ReelShort
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00:00:03Ellen Musk, la única mujer en la 30 under 30 de la lista de 30 en Atlanta hoy en día.
00:00:09¿Qué es lo que a business tycoon está haciendo aquí en Georgia?
00:00:11A forgotten stage no uno conoce.
00:00:14Angela, mi siguiente amigo.
00:00:16¿Estás vendiendo tu junko aquí?
00:00:18Si tu madre-in-la sees, ella va a ir a la Bigfoot de nuevo.
00:00:23Tu madre-in-la was right sobre ti.
00:00:26¿Qué es lo que pasa de ver el video de estos mongoles si no puedes aplicar a ellos?
00:00:30¿Qué es lo que pasa de ti?
00:00:31¿Y cómo te sabes que esto no es mi...
00:00:33...business?
00:00:35¡All right, everybody get out!
00:00:38¡We got an important guest coming!
00:00:42¡You!
00:00:47¿Ya deaf?
00:00:48¡I said pack up and scran!
00:00:50I paid the stall fee already.
00:00:51And if you want me to leave, then fine.
00:00:54But you have to compensate for today's losses.
00:00:57¿Y want to say that again?
00:01:00You know who's visiting today?
00:01:03¡Ellen freaking Musk!
00:01:05One of the richest people in the world.
00:01:07¡Ellen Musk?
00:01:08Of course a hick like you probably never heard of her.
00:01:10Just know that you can't afford to piss her off.
00:01:14Really.
00:01:16Really.
00:01:16Elon Musk is flying all the way to Atlanta just to come to some flea market.
00:01:20You don't think that she could be coming to see me?
00:01:27Coming to see you.
00:01:28All right.
00:01:29You know what?
00:01:30I'll play your game.
00:01:30If she does it so much as give you a glance, I'll eat dirt.
00:01:38Deal.
00:01:38Go.
00:01:47Elon Musk, get to the flea market within 10 minutes.
00:01:50Or else, you're fired.
00:02:11Prepare the limo.
00:02:12Well, Ms. Lockhart requires us immediately.
00:02:21Ah, your 10 minutes is almost up.
00:02:23Good.
00:02:24Hope you don't wet your pants.
00:02:26Five.
00:02:27Four.
00:02:30Three.
00:02:33Two.
00:02:34One.
00:02:38Ellen.
00:02:39Uh, I mean, Ms. Musk.
00:02:41Uh, Ellen.
00:02:41Uh, I mean, uh, I'm sorry that I, uh, sorry to frighten you.
00:02:47How's my boss, bitch?
00:02:49Kickin' ass, girlfriend.
00:02:51So how do you, like...
00:02:54She's my boss.
00:02:56Eh, I prefer business partner or best friend.
00:03:01No way.
00:03:05Well?
00:03:08No.
00:03:09No!
00:03:10No, no, I'm sorry for effending your boss.
00:03:12No, I won't do it again.
00:03:16All right, that's enough.
00:03:17We're not tyrants here.
00:03:20Okay.
00:03:25Sir, I found Angela Lockhart.
00:03:33You mean Angela Lockhart.
00:03:36My unalue bride.
00:03:38You made me lose one million dollars in just one game of poker.
00:03:43Who are you?
00:03:46Where is she?
00:03:48Atlanta.
00:03:49And you were right.
00:03:50It was secretly her propping up Ellen Musk.
00:03:53My clever bride.
00:03:54I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to.
00:04:02Bex, prep the jet.
00:04:03I'm heading to Atlanta.
00:04:09Dr. Wilson, Devin Sterling's on the move.
00:04:11He's headed to Atlanta.
00:04:13Atlanta.
00:04:13The game is afoot.
00:04:15I'm going.
00:04:16Wait, Dr. Wilson.
00:04:17The Prince of Bhutan needs your medical attention.
00:04:19He can wait.
00:04:20I need to pick up my bride.
00:04:25But Dr. Wilson.
00:04:32General Eisenhower reporting.
00:04:35Devin Sterling and Shane Wilson are headed to Atlanta.
00:04:38Atlanta.
00:04:40Where is that?
00:04:42Whatever.
00:04:43Prepare my war plate.
00:04:44Those two going after my fiance.
00:04:47This is war.
00:05:04I've secretly allowed your husband, Jared Cooper, to win the bid on the Maple Plaza project like you asked me
00:05:09to.
00:05:10Thank you so much, Ellen.
00:05:12This is going to be the best anniversary gift ever.
00:05:14That project is worth billions.
00:05:17He can finally take his company public.
00:05:19But Angela, my boss, I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes without ever revealing
00:05:27your true identity.
00:05:29Without your backing, no offense, but he's nothing without you.
00:05:34Well, three years ago.
00:05:56You saved me.
00:06:01He saved me, and I fell in love with him instantly.
00:06:05I didn't want to reveal my true identity because I didn't want him to feel the pressure of being with
00:06:09a billionaire heiress.
00:06:12But now, with this contract, I feel like we'll be on more equal footing, and then I can finally come
00:06:18out to the public.
00:06:19So that's why you have me secretly helping him.
00:06:23I'm sure he'll be moved when he finds out.
00:06:27But why work at the flea market?
00:06:30Are you disguising yourself to test him?
00:06:33Well, these exotic spices are incredibly rare and cost a fortune to find.
00:06:39Plus, I get to make the best dishes for my hubby and his mom.
00:06:43You seem happy being a housewife.
00:06:46Yeah.
00:06:49Where the hell are you?
00:06:50Don't tell me you were selling junk at the flea market again.
00:06:54Get home, stat.
00:06:55It's a big day today.
00:06:59That was...
00:07:00My mother-in-law, Carol, she judges me because she thinks I come from a lower-class family, but she's
00:07:07going to be ecstatic tonight when I finally come out and tell her who I really am.
00:07:10And, you know, she even remembered her third-year anniversary.
00:07:19Please spend more time with my son.
00:07:23Hi, I'm home.
00:07:25I have a big announcement I have to make.
00:07:28Finally, you're back.
00:07:29Now sign the divorce papers.
00:07:33Divorce papers.
00:07:36Is this some sort of misunderstanding, Mom?
00:07:39God, don't call me Mom again.
00:07:43We're ending that relationship.
00:07:45Just look at you.
00:07:46Dirt all over.
00:07:47You're selling the title of Mrs. Cooper.
00:07:50You don't deserve my son.
00:07:51You're way below his league.
00:07:54I'm below his league?
00:07:56That's right.
00:07:58You are.
00:07:59Jared is signing a hundred-billion-dollar contract tomorrow with THE Ellen Musk.
00:08:05And then his company's going public.
00:08:08That's how much he's accomplished in three years.
00:08:11But you?
00:08:12You're still just a stinky, hippie peddler.
00:08:17Jared's like the king in the clouds.
00:08:19And you...
00:08:20You will always just be a pawn.
00:08:24Like dirt.
00:08:26Dirt on our shoes.
00:08:29Dirt on your shoes?
00:08:31But Ellen Musk works for me.
00:08:34You're delusional.
00:08:36You will never upgrade to a queen.
00:08:39How dare you compare yourself to the real deal here.
00:08:44Resorting to lies.
00:08:46Definitely not good enough for Jared.
00:08:48And who are you to come into my house and meddle with my family matters?
00:08:56You're nothing but a pathetic excuse for a wife.
00:09:01Jared deserves a queen like Kaylee.
00:09:04Not a low-life dirtbag.
00:09:06Enough!
00:09:07Jared.
00:09:09I knew you wouldn't divorce me.
00:09:11But I am.
00:09:14Don't fight it, Angela.
00:09:16Here's 500k.
00:09:18You'll never make this much as a hippie peddler selling spices.
00:09:22Now sign the papers, take your check, and leave.
00:09:25Don't embarrass yourself further.
00:09:28I've done so much for you these past three years.
00:09:33Did that not mean anything to you?
00:09:36I didn't expect you to be so greedy.
00:09:39Fine.
00:09:40Here's another 200,000.
00:09:43$500,000 is too much for her already.
00:09:46She's done nothing.
00:09:47Hasn't even contributed a grandchild.
00:09:51She just sells cheap grass all day.
00:09:53Is that really how much I'm worth to all of you?
00:09:58I took care of both of you these past three years.
00:10:02You think we can't just hire a maid to cook for us or something?
00:10:06And she wouldn't embarrass us with that permanent stench.
00:10:11A hippie peddler becoming the wife of a CEO?
00:10:14What a joke.
00:10:16If you actually love my son, you'll sign the damn divorce papers already.
00:10:22And leave!
00:10:25You really think that Jared would have gotten that Mabel Plaza bid without me?
00:10:29Let alone taking the company public?
00:10:32I did everything for you, Jared.
00:10:36Now you take credit for my son's success?
00:10:42It's all my work!
00:10:46Baby, we're going to be late for the auction if we keep letting this psycho stall us.
00:10:54You did say you would win me Princess Diana's tiara, didn't you?
00:10:59So, she's the reason for the divorce.
00:11:03She's worth more than you, Angela.
00:11:07Fine.
00:11:08I'll sign it.
00:11:11But don't regret it.
00:11:14Regret?
00:11:16You know who I am.
00:11:17Yeah, a cockroach that only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:11:22I'm Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
00:11:26Jared winning the bid on Mabel Plaza was because of my dad.
00:11:31Because he's business partners with Elon Musk.
00:11:35It's part of the power that I have as an elite.
00:11:38You can't do shit because you're poor.
00:11:43Social stratum matters.
00:11:45Yeah, social stratum does matter.
00:11:49And the Coopers are beneath me.
00:11:52And you really think Elon Musk would come to Atlanta if it weren't for me?
00:11:57Ha!
00:11:58You're delusional.
00:12:00Now sign the papers and scram!
00:12:04Ah!
00:12:06You owe me.
00:12:08You dirty bitch.
00:12:09You sicken me.
00:12:10Ah!
00:12:16You hit me.
00:12:20Now sign the papers, take your check, and get the fuck out!
00:12:39I don't need your penny money.
00:12:43We're finished.
00:12:45You don't want the money, that's your loss.
00:12:48Your check is just pennies to me.
00:12:51But I would like my ring back.
00:12:54Oh.
00:13:02Have fun on your economy flight while I catch you out on my private helicopter out of here.
00:13:13And I'm way out of your league.
00:13:20Isn't that the Winston Blue Diamond ring?
00:13:24It's worth tens of millions of dollars.
00:13:28Oh, it's probably just cheap glass.
00:13:31Something she found at the flea market.
00:13:33You're right.
00:13:34She could never afford anything so expensive.
00:13:40Congrats, Jared Boo Boo, on getting rid of that dirt bag.
00:13:44Oh!
00:13:45My dad says there's going to be a secret big shot financial tycoon at tomorrow's summit.
00:13:52Bigger big shot than Elon Musk?
00:13:54Yeah.
00:13:55And nobody's met them, but I can introduce you.
00:13:58Oh.
00:14:00Everything's thanks to you, babe.
00:14:17Angela, Mr. Vanderbilt, the richest man in Georgia, wants to schedule a meeting before the bidding.
00:14:23Vanderbilt?
00:14:23Yeah, he's actually CEO of one of our companies.
00:14:27Basically our employee.
00:14:28Okay, I'll meet him at the summit tomorrow.
00:14:30It's fine.
00:14:31You're still going to the summit tomorrow?
00:14:32But you and Jared Cooper are already divorced.
00:14:35That's exactly why I'm going.
00:14:58Angela Lockhart.
00:15:01I finally found you.
00:15:03Who is he?
00:15:05That, that's Devin Sterling.
00:15:08He's number one on Forbes' 30 under 30 list, an early investor of crypto, CEO of Sterling Enterprises.
00:15:14Rumor has that he's worth trillions.
00:15:17And he's your fiancé.
00:15:21What?
00:15:21What?
00:15:22My fiancé?
00:15:24The one and only.
00:15:27So, after running away and leaving me single for three years, have you figured out how you're going to make
00:15:33it up to me yet?
00:15:35Babe?
00:15:43That tiara looks perfect on you.
00:15:49What is she doing here?
00:15:54You skank.
00:15:56My son just divorced you yesterday and you're already hooking up with another man.
00:16:01Divorced?
00:16:03That's right.
00:16:05So, I guess this was never meant to be Mr. Sterling.
00:16:11Devin Sterling.
00:16:13So she has to hide her marital status to find another man.
00:16:17Guess she's not just a forsaken woman.
00:16:19She's also a stinky, penniless whore.
00:16:24How dare you insult my boss like that.
00:16:27Who the fuck are you, bitch?
00:16:31Do you know who I am?
00:16:33They don't know who you are.
00:16:36You hide it well.
00:16:39X-Team!
00:16:40Teach these fools a lesson.
00:16:43Teach these fools a lesson.
00:16:49Sir, you were kind of in a rush when you flew to Atlanta.
00:16:52And then to New York.
00:16:53You forgot to bring the security team.
00:17:01Mind if I borrow your men?
00:17:04No, I have to.
00:17:08Toss these ill-mannered apes out.
00:17:10Oh, you bitch.
00:17:12I'll have my son teach you a real lesson.
00:17:20A kiss as a reward, my lady.
00:17:24No.
00:17:32Guest list is very distinguished tonight.
00:17:35You've got Bill Ford, Harvey Buffett, old money like me.
00:17:41Gentlemen, Harvey, Bill, this is Jared Cooper.
00:17:44Pleased to meet you all.
00:17:45Your family's all started empires after the Industrial Revolution.
00:17:48What an honor.
00:17:49I heard you secured the Maple Plaza project.
00:17:53It's worth billions of dollars.
00:17:54Congrats.
00:17:55You'll be next.
00:17:56Thank you.
00:17:57But we haven't received a contract yet.
00:17:59We deserve it.
00:18:00Hard.
00:18:01Oh, that's nothing.
00:18:01I introduced this kid to Ellen Musk.
00:18:04The Vanderbilts and Miss Musk have always had a good relationship.
00:18:07So, I'm going to help the kid out, pull a few strings.
00:18:11Thank you, Mr. Vanderbilt.
00:18:12Now, we just have to impress Miss Musk's special guest of honor.
00:18:17Yes.
00:18:18I heard they're a very important and powerful guest.
00:18:22Even wealthier than Ellen Musk.
00:18:24Now, if we can just secure a position with this big shot,
00:18:28we can feast for generations.
00:18:33Up to my best.
00:18:39Excuse me.
00:18:40Second, gentlemen.
00:18:42What if it's the Prince of Bhutan?
00:18:47How did a hobo like you sneak in here?
00:18:49Me, a hobo.
00:18:51How did a cheating scumbag like you sneak in here?
00:18:54Sleep your way in?
00:18:55I told you, Angela Lockhart, don't bother stalking me.
00:18:58Nothing will come of it, and it only sickens me further.
00:19:02Don't flatter yourself.
00:19:06This is your ex-husband?
00:19:10What, were you blindfolded when you married him?
00:19:13Who the hell is this?
00:19:14You were cheating on me?
00:19:27Son, you have to avenge me and Kaylee.
00:19:31That wicked ex-wife of yours hired some thugs and a gigolo to beat us up.
00:19:36They even took Kaylee's tiara.
00:19:50You dare hurt my mom, Kaylee?
00:19:55Get your hands off of her.
00:20:01My lady.
00:20:16My queen.
00:20:18My queen.
00:20:29It's...
00:20:29It's him!
00:20:31He scammed a million dollars off me in a game of poker yesterday!
00:20:35Who are these peasants?
00:20:37These seats are reserved for the Ellen Musk and her special guest.
00:20:42Oh, shut up, old man.
00:20:44You're disturbing the peace.
00:20:49Fuckers, you know who that is?
00:20:50That's Eric Vanderbilt.
00:20:52You have any idea how many generations of wealth he has?
00:20:55His ancestors built the railway and steamship empire of America.
00:20:59The Civil War would not have been won without his family's involvement.
00:21:03Vanderbilt.
00:21:05The father of that skank, Kaylee Vanderbilt,
00:21:09who only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:21:14That?
00:21:15The only Vanderbilt family.
00:21:23Oh, goddammit.
00:21:25A stomach ache now?
00:21:29Whatever.
00:21:31Angela can handle herself.
00:21:32She'll be fine.
00:21:45How dare you call one of us alone?
00:21:48I'm Harvey F. and Buffett,
00:21:50the most important investor in the entire stock market.
00:21:53I can wipe you out with a simple pinky only.
00:21:58And I can wipe you out with a strand of my hair.
00:22:02Not with me around.
00:22:04I, Bill Ford, and the entire Ford Auto Empire stand with these gentlemen.
00:22:09You're all just peasants compared to who I really am.
00:22:14You're fucking delusional, Angela.
00:22:17We've had enough of your games.
00:22:18Security!
00:22:19Break their limbs and toss them out.
00:22:22Looks like the old guard is teaming up against you.
00:22:25But don't worry.
00:22:27You got no money here.
00:22:30I can handle myself, thank you.
00:22:33Yes, my great.
00:22:35You're all despicable.
00:22:38An insult to your family names.
00:22:43Now, it's my turn to rule.
00:22:46Destroy Jared Cooper.
00:22:49Cut off all business ties.
00:22:51And if you don't,
00:22:54I will take away all of your family's wealth and power.
00:22:59Ha!
00:23:00I knew it!
00:23:01You're here to fuck with me.
00:23:02You can't fool anyone here.
00:23:04How much money did you spend on that get-up
00:23:05and to hire that gigolo to make me jealous?
00:23:08You're an orphan
00:23:09who sells hippie spices at a flea market.
00:23:12You have nothing.
00:23:14And you will always be nothing.
00:23:17She's a gold digger.
00:23:19Gold digger.
00:23:21Gigolo.
00:23:22Want to try me for a night?
00:23:25Yeah, you're a little too pricey.
00:23:27Mr. Vanderbilt,
00:23:28we really shouldn't keep these bandits here any longer.
00:23:30They might upset Miss Ellen Musk and her special guest.
00:23:33Angela Lockhart is my spurned ex-wife.
00:23:35She's only here to try and ruin my bill in the Maple Plaza project.
00:23:38Oh, I'm gonna kill that sushi chef.
00:23:41Security!
00:23:46Security!
00:23:48You all don't realize that you actually all work for me.
00:23:51And now you're trying to throw a coup?
00:23:54You?
00:23:54You!
00:23:56Insolent fools.
00:23:58Let me guess.
00:23:59You're that special guest?
00:24:02I don't know.
00:24:04Throw them out!
00:24:05And not without some broken bones, too.
00:24:14You backed out of that.
00:24:19I got this.
00:24:47What the hell are you two doing here?
00:24:49I thought we were supposed to guard you.
00:24:51No, you're supposed to make sure Miss Lockhart is okay.
00:24:54Oh my god, we're so screwed!
00:25:05Angela!
00:25:07Don't hurt her!
00:25:08You bitch.
00:25:09I've always been sick of you.
00:25:11You just threw yourself at me.
00:25:12How dare you insult my boss like that.
00:25:15Boss?
00:25:16Did she say her boss?
00:25:17Miss Musk?
00:25:19That's Ellen Musk?
00:25:20That woman right there is Angela Lockhart.
00:25:23My boss and sole heiress to the Henry Lockhart's fortune.
00:25:27Their lineage is older than this country itself.
00:25:30Past the American Revolution?
00:25:32Back to the Renaissance.
00:25:33If she's your boss, then that means Angela Lockhart is...
00:25:37That's Lady Lockhart to you.
00:25:39She's royalty.
00:25:40And since you're all subsidiaries, she's your boss's boss.
00:25:44What do you think I'm going to do?
00:25:45Kneel for me.
00:25:46Oh, your majesty.
00:25:50Welcome to the United States.
00:25:53We've always been your royal subject.
00:25:56Yes, your highness.
00:25:58Is it queen or princess?
00:26:00It doesn't matter.
00:26:02My queen, please forgive our insolence.
00:26:05Oh, yes, we didn't mean to offend.
00:26:07Hey, what are you doing, idiot?
00:26:09Let go of the boss lady and beg for forgiveness.
00:26:22What rightfully belongs to you.
00:26:41She's a badass herself.
00:26:43He missed out on a good wife.
00:26:46You, you, you told me your wife was a hippie peddler.
00:26:50Turns out you were the freeloading scumbag this entire time.
00:26:53No, no, don't believe their lies.
00:26:54I worked hard for everything.
00:26:56You worked for everything?
00:27:03Hi, honey.
00:27:05So, our third year anniversary is coming up
00:27:08and I thought that maybe we can do something special this year.
00:27:10I can't focus on anything trivial like that.
00:27:12I have to figure out this bid for the Maple Plaza project
00:27:15and if I get it, I can take the company public.
00:27:25You were nothing before me.
00:27:29All your achievements, all your glory,
00:27:32that's all mine, including the Maple Plaza contract.
00:27:37I can take all of that away, just like that.
00:27:42No, you can't take that away from me.
00:27:43So that's why Elon Musk was urging us
00:27:45to pass on deals to this nobody.
00:27:47Oh, and this antique wedding ring.
00:27:51Yeah, I forgot to tell you.
00:27:53It was Queen Victoria's
00:27:54and it's worth is equivalent to more than an entire country's GDP.
00:28:04Oh, no.
00:28:05I gave you back the ring?
00:28:07I divorced a royal heiress?
00:28:09No!
00:28:10No, please, no!
00:28:12No, please take me back, baby!
00:28:15I still love you!
00:28:16Oh, man.
00:28:20Looks like they've started the party without us.
00:28:22No one's allowed to start a fight without Cole Eisenhower!
00:28:31Guard these two again.
00:28:33Did he say...
00:28:34Is he Cole Eisenhower?
00:28:36President Eisenhower's descendant.
00:28:38After General Eisenhower won World War II,
00:28:40each of his descendants have all gone on
00:28:42to become five-star generals,
00:28:43the highest rank in the nation's military.
00:28:45Glad you buffoons know your history.
00:28:47Sorry, I'm late, babe.
00:28:48I got lost trying to find Atlanta.
00:28:50Then lost again on my way back to New York.
00:28:57And that there is...
00:28:58That is the legendary boy genius, Dr. Wilson.
00:29:02He's Dr. House's protege.
00:29:04Dr. House?
00:29:05Yes.
00:29:05I thought that was just a TV show.
00:29:07Oh, no.
00:29:08That's based on real figure.
00:29:09Yep, that's me.
00:29:10Son of James House.
00:29:12Dr. House, he's practically my uncle.
00:29:15I correctly diagnosed the Pope before him
00:29:17when I was just 12 years old.
00:29:18So he's been off crowning himself a waterfall
00:29:21somewhere in the Netherlands
00:29:22for the last 14 years.
00:29:24And I'm late because I ran out of gum
00:29:26and had to make a pit stop.
00:29:32Hey, Alan.
00:29:33Who are these weirdos and why are they here?
00:29:36Uh, they're all your fiancés.
00:29:39What?
00:29:40Fiancés.
00:29:43Plural?
00:29:44Fiancés.
00:29:46Plural?
00:29:47Fiancés.
00:29:58Plural?
00:30:00How are all three of these men my fiancés?
00:30:05Uh, your father had arranged these engagements years ago,
00:30:08but I didn't tell you because you decided to marry Jared Cooper
00:30:11at the time.
00:30:12She has three bad-ass fiancés and she marries his dumbass.
00:30:19Whatever.
00:30:21Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:30:25Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:30:30At your service.
00:30:32Me too.
00:30:38One down, two more to go.
00:30:40She's become queen.
00:30:41Bishop to g4.
00:30:46Ow!
00:30:47Ow!
00:30:48Ow!
00:30:48What is that?
00:30:50The most German fest and water in the Nile River.
00:30:56Rook to a8.
00:30:58That's right.
00:31:02Hello?
00:31:06I thought I was king.
00:31:07No, you wish.
00:31:08The king doesn't do anything, so Ellen can be my king.
00:31:12Oh, fine.
00:31:17Bankrupt the forwards right this second.
00:31:24I...
00:31:26I've been bankrupt!
00:31:27No!
00:31:29No!
00:31:30Who is it?
00:31:36I've been bankrupt!
00:31:38No!
00:31:39I told you I would remove all of you from status and power
00:31:42if you didn't cooperate.
00:31:43Well, guess what?
00:31:45Game over.
00:31:46All right, boys.
00:31:47Let's figure out this four-way engagement.
00:31:49Oh, that's serious business.
00:31:52I'm right with you.
00:31:54Wait for me.
00:31:55Nobody beats me to the finish line.
00:32:05Hey, Angela!
00:32:09You already have three fiancés?
00:32:12You can't accuse me of cheating.
00:32:14I...
00:32:15want compensation.
00:32:19You greedy S.O.B.
00:32:21Who the fuck is that?
00:32:23My ex-husband.
00:32:25Wait, you were married?
00:32:26Yeah, and if that's a problem for you, then you can totally back out of this engagement.
00:32:31More for me.
00:32:32No, no, of course not.
00:32:34Just...
00:32:35Do you want me to check your eyes for you?
00:32:37Don't steal my joke.
00:32:38I can make him disappear without a trace.
00:32:40I'll live with this of your past with him.
00:32:42Oh, my God.
00:32:44What?
00:32:44Is there something on my face?
00:32:46Uh, yeah.
00:32:47Murderous intent.
00:32:49Let's remarry.
00:32:51Let's remarry.
00:32:53You still don't realize I only fell in love with you because you saved me from drowning three
00:32:59years ago.
00:33:25Sir, it's an emergency.
00:33:27We need to wreck right away.
00:33:29Nicole Eisenhower and Shane Wilson are causing mayhem at the company warehouse.
00:33:33Okay, I'm on my way.
00:33:37She should be okay now.
00:33:42Hey, you!
00:33:44Watch over here.
00:33:45I'll be right back.
00:33:54You saved me.
00:33:58Fuck.
00:34:00I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:34:03Fuck.
00:34:04I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:34:06You've cheated on me.
00:34:08You've hit me.
00:34:09You've insulted me.
00:34:11And after all that, I never want to see you again.
00:34:15I fucking hate you.
00:34:18Lady Lockhart.
00:34:20God, what now?
00:34:22Oh, yes.
00:34:24We understand that you are a very busy person.
00:34:27But if you're not going to give your ex-husband the Maple Plaza Project.
00:34:31How about us three?
00:34:32Yes.
00:34:33Unlike that scumbag, we won't turn on you.
00:34:36Yeah, no.
00:34:37You're all fired for trying to throw a coup.
00:34:39But this is your fault, you doofus.
00:34:43We never should have believed your bullshit.
00:34:45We can't.
00:34:47No.
00:34:48We can't lose our positions with Ellen Musk and the Lockhart.
00:34:52Our families.
00:34:54I'll get you for this.
00:35:02Never should have listened to you.
00:35:03I'm ruined because of you.
00:35:20So, what's the situation here?
00:35:22I want to marry you.
00:35:31I want to marry you.
00:35:34Listen, I only met you guys a few hours ago and I'm not interested in flash marriages.
00:35:42But what if I told you that we've known each other for much longer than just a few hours?
00:35:48Much longer.
00:35:52Angela, your parents would like to have a video call with all of you.
00:36:00My lovely princess, how are you?
00:36:03Look, your mother and I are in Italy.
00:36:06The views here are absolutely stunning.
00:36:08Perfect for a wedding, wouldn't you say?
00:36:10I heard you finally divorced that good-for-nothing, blood-sucking, free-letter husband of yours.
00:36:18Can't call his name.
00:36:20But anyway, congratulations.
00:36:22I've selected three prime young men for you to choose from to replace him.
00:36:28Oh, you must pick one of them to marry.
00:36:31Otherwise...
00:36:32Oh, let me do it.
00:36:33You must choose one of them in seven days.
00:36:37Otherwise, we'll kill ourselves.
00:36:40Mom!
00:36:42All right, honey.
00:36:43That's it.
00:36:44Bye.
00:36:45Bye.
00:36:49So, who are we going to choose?
00:36:54Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:36:59Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:37:04That seems greedy.
00:37:12But I can always remove the other two options.
00:37:16Hey, I may be a doctor, but I can take lives too.
00:37:20I know and have access to all the devious poisons in the world.
00:37:25Whoa, okay.
00:37:26No murder, please.
00:37:28I was just kidding.
00:37:30We have seven days to win her over.
00:37:32Ooh, it's like the Bachelorette.
00:37:36I know.
00:37:37We'll start with challenge one.
00:37:41Welcome to the show, the three badasses who want me.
00:37:45Today, we have our first challenge.
00:37:49What is all of this, Ellen?
00:37:52You'll see.
00:38:01Oh, my God.
00:38:02Oh, my God.
00:38:03Cockroaches!
00:38:04All women are afraid of cockroaches, and it is every man's job to save their beloved woman
00:38:10from this monstrosity of a creature.
00:38:13What will our three candidates do to prove their undying love for our single, but screaming
00:38:18her head off, heiress?
00:38:28Looks like one of our contestants has already called it quits.
00:38:30It's up to the final two.
00:38:55Crunchy.
00:38:57That is sick cold.
00:38:59Hey, when you're stranded in the middle of the battlefield, you'll be glad to see one
00:39:02of these around.
00:39:05There are two more left.
00:39:07Want to try one?
00:39:07Oh, my God.
00:39:08No.
00:39:09No.
00:39:11Oh, my God.
00:39:12Save me.
00:39:12Save you.
00:39:13Save me.
00:39:17I'm a German phoic doctor.
00:39:19These hands can't get germs on them.
00:39:21They're for surgery and saving lives.
00:39:38Thank God you're here.
00:39:41Are you all right, honey?
00:39:44Angela!
00:39:48All right, you won the first challenge, so your reward, you get to watch over her for
00:39:53the night.
00:39:54Just don't cross the line, if you know what I mean.
00:39:56I'm not her scumbag husband.
00:39:58You have nothing to worry about.
00:40:05Honestly, even if you guys fuck, it's not like it's against the rules or anything.
00:40:08At least my girlfriend gets some.
00:40:10I bet her husband does a small dick anyway.
00:40:14The cockroaches.
00:40:15They're gone.
00:40:16They're gone.
00:40:17There's nothing in this room except you and me, okay?
00:40:21I'm going to kill Ellen when I see her tomorrow.
00:40:28I need a drink.
00:40:37Whoa, easy.
00:40:38You're on an empty stomach.
00:40:40Oh, why do you care?
00:40:42Are you trying to drink away your sorrows, Angela?
00:40:47You guys were right.
00:40:49I was blind for marrying that asshole.
00:40:53You know, I wasted three whole years of my life with him.
00:40:59He never even loved me.
00:41:00And I gave up my entire career for him.
00:41:07Do you really think that you would still be number one on the Forbes 30 under 30 list if I
00:41:11was around?
00:41:15You may not be number one on the Forbes list, but you know what you're number one in?
00:41:20What?
00:41:24You know, we've known each other kind of a long time.
00:41:35Lies.
00:41:38You all just want something from me.
00:41:46Angela, I know it's hard to trust again.
00:41:50But I assure you, I don't care what family you're from.
00:41:57I'm the richest man in the nation.
00:41:58I don't need your power, your status, your wealth, your connections.
00:42:06I just need you.
00:42:10I'll prove my love to you within six days.
00:42:12I promise.
00:42:23Screw the contest.
00:42:26I just want love.
00:42:29Angela.
00:42:30You're drunk.
00:42:32I'm an adult.
00:42:33Can't I go just get what she wants?
00:42:36Okay.
00:42:41But love and sex aren't exactly the same thing.
00:42:45Oh, they're not mutually exclusive either.
00:42:57This is what you want.
00:43:25Nine-inch penis.
00:43:27Morning to you, too.
00:43:29You sure you were drunk last night?
00:43:31You were...
00:43:32A girl remembers when she's had a nine-inch penis inside of her.
00:43:37Well, glad you enjoyed it.
00:43:40But don't tell Shane or Cole.
00:43:44Because then they would...
00:43:45Say that you were being unfair?
00:43:47Technically, us having sex doesn't break any rules.
00:43:50I won the first challenge, and according to Ellen,
00:43:53my prize was to spend a night with you anyway.
00:43:57Don't make this any harder than it already is.
00:44:03Are you sure you don't want a pretty heart?
00:44:07Stop.
00:44:10Fine, fine, fine.
00:44:14I won't tell.
00:44:17But only on one condition.
00:44:20I won't tell.
00:44:23But only on one condition.
00:44:25You have to go out on a date with me.
00:44:29Fine.
00:44:33I've had a crush on you since college, Angela.
00:44:36You never noticed me.
00:44:41Oh, uh...
00:44:42You should get dressed and get out of here before anyone sees you.
00:44:48It's only 7 a.m.
00:44:49She's still sleeping.
00:44:50I'm not sleeping alone.
00:44:51Yeah, I'm not letting my fiancée be alone with another man for another second.
00:44:57Morning, gentlemen.
00:44:59Oh, or shall I say rachmen?
00:45:01Oh, don't mind him.
00:45:04What's up, guys?
00:45:05We're ready for the second challenge.
00:45:08No cockroaches this time.
00:45:09Yes.
00:45:10No more terrifying things.
00:45:12That was my bad, Angela.
00:45:13This better be a good challenge, Ellen.
00:45:15I'm sure you'll all enjoy this one.
00:45:17The second challenge is...
00:45:19The second challenge is...
00:45:21A date.
00:45:22Lane, I should have asked for something else.
00:45:25A date?
00:45:26That's it.
00:45:27What's the catch?
00:45:29No catch.
00:45:29Just who Miss Lockhart enjoys spending her time with the most.
00:45:32As simple as that.
00:45:33I know what I want to do.
00:45:34Let's start with me first.
00:45:35Okay.
00:45:36Calls up first.
00:45:37Then...
00:45:37Me.
00:45:38Save the best for last.
00:45:40Ain't that right, Angela?
00:45:42Then it's decided.
00:45:47Please, don't take my BMW away.
00:45:50Too bad.
00:45:51You pissed off the Lockhart's.
00:45:54I have nothing left.
00:46:03It's that bitch who ruined me.
00:46:08It's that bitch who ruined me.
00:46:19General Eisenhower, sirs!
00:46:21At ease, Lieutenant.
00:46:22This is my Lieutenant.
00:46:24He also manages this boxing job.
00:46:26Pleasure to meet you, Madam Eisenhower!
00:46:27He's so serious.
00:46:29But, hang on.
00:46:31Lieutenant, I don't know who I'm going to marry yet.
00:46:34Baby!
00:46:35I decided to take you here on my first date
00:46:37so that I can introduce you to my guns!
00:46:39Guns?
00:46:39Like murder weapons?
00:46:42Yes.
00:46:43Murder weapons.
00:47:03You're like my guns, babe.
00:47:05Pretty rock hard.
00:47:07Yeah.
00:47:08Let me show you what I can do with them.
00:47:10Lieutenant!
00:47:11Come close!
00:47:13Wait!
00:47:14You're just going to hit him like that?
00:47:16He's not even going to fight back?
00:47:17Fighting back will be treason, ma'am!
00:47:19Treason?
00:47:20You guys are way too serious.
00:47:23Look, you rock hard bitch!
00:47:24I caught you!
00:47:25If I'm going down,
00:47:26you're all going down with me!
00:47:28Lieutenant, pincer attack!
00:47:35Ah!
00:47:42You dare try to hurt my wife?
00:47:47I will make you pay!
00:47:50You don't need to keep beating him up.
00:47:52We could just take him to the cops.
00:47:54Not when he tries to hurt you!
00:48:01It's always a bit violent.
00:48:03Some might call it being protective.
00:48:05Poor anger issues.
00:48:07What if we get married
00:48:08and I forget to use a coaster
00:48:09on an antique table or something?
00:48:11Is he going to be, like, rough?
00:48:14Hey, some girls are into that.
00:48:16I don't know if I am.
00:48:19Well, maybe Shane will be your type.
00:48:25Your date with Shane starts now.
00:48:30Hey.
00:48:31Hey.
00:48:33Cool ride.
00:48:35A gift from the Chancellor of Germany
00:48:37when I saved his wife.
00:48:38Impressive.
00:48:42Your breath smells like peppermint.
00:48:45Refreshing.
00:48:46I got cool mint, too.
00:48:48Huh?
00:48:49Or do you prefer spearmint?
00:48:51What do you not have in this coat of yours?
00:48:55Fruit flavor, girl.
00:48:56I can't stand those.
00:48:57So, where are you taking these?
00:48:59Let me show you.
00:49:00Okay.
00:49:07Dr. Wilson!
00:49:09Oh, my VIP of VIPs!
00:49:12Right this way.
00:49:13VIP of VIPs?
00:49:14Ah, just some other guy I saved.
00:49:17I forget who.
00:49:18You saved a lot of football.
00:49:20I do what I can.
00:49:22Oh, my gosh.
00:49:24It's my gold-digging neighbor
00:49:25who just got dumped by her husband.
00:49:28Sandra Miller.
00:49:30What are you doing here?
00:49:31I just thought this was for the VIP of VIPs.
00:49:34Your mother-in-law told me all about the divorce
00:49:36and how you hired some gigolo
00:49:37to beat her and Kaylee Vanderbilt up.
00:49:41How low of you.
00:49:43What are you doing here, Sandra?
00:49:45Of course your bird brain wouldn't remember.
00:49:47I sell high-fashion jewelry pieces so high-end
00:49:50you couldn't even afford
00:49:51even if you sold your organs.
00:49:54The auction begins.
00:49:56I'll deal with you later.
00:49:59I'll just be going to see you later.
00:50:05Cameron, I have a task for you.
00:50:10Our next piece is absolutely extraordinary.
00:50:14Cleopatra's Armband.
00:50:16Sold by our vendor, Sandra Miller
00:50:19for $5 million.
00:50:21And tell us.
00:50:23Excuse me.
00:50:24I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:50:27It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:50:29I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:50:32It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:50:34What are you doing?
00:50:35Just watch.
00:50:37Come on.
00:50:42That is Queen Victoria's ring?
00:50:45Please.
00:50:46I'm an expert and that's a fake.
00:50:48She probably got it at the flea market she works at.
00:50:51You work at a flea market?
00:50:52Not this again.
00:50:54Cut the bullshit.
00:50:55That wouldn't even sell for $5.
00:50:57Oh yeah?
00:50:58Here, you want it?
00:50:59For free.
00:51:00Ew!
00:51:01I don't want that trash
00:51:02from a stinky hippie peddler.
00:51:04Well, that's too bad then
00:51:06because you are the fraud.
00:51:10What are you talking about?
00:51:11Who the hell are you to accuse me?
00:51:13Throw them out!
00:51:15Dr. Wilson, I know you're a legend in medicine
00:51:18but we're professionals.
00:51:20Oh yeah?
00:51:21And that armband sells for $5 million?
00:51:25Yeah.
00:51:26Mine is the real thing.
00:51:27You two are just upset
00:51:29because you're too poor
00:51:30to afford our luxury items.
00:51:33Why was that so?
00:51:34Would a so-called expert
00:51:35fail to recognize Queen Victoria's ring then?
00:51:38Dear Lord,
00:51:41this is real.
00:51:42It's authentic.
00:51:44It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:51:49Cameron, what have you found?
00:51:52Yeah, that picture of Cleopatra's armband
00:51:54you sent me, it's a replica.
00:51:57They have the same one right here
00:51:59at the flea market.
00:52:00So,
00:52:03you are the fraud.
00:52:05So you just went to the flea market
00:52:06so you can buy some fakes.
00:52:08And Cameron,
00:52:09how much are these fakes being sold for?
00:52:12$150.
00:52:13Wow, not even $5.
00:52:16Sandra.
00:52:17You've been duping us the whole time?
00:52:21Arrest her!
00:52:22No!
00:52:23Please!
00:52:24He was just this one time!
00:52:26Please!
00:52:27What's going on, Dr. Wilson?
00:52:29Uh, investigating lead poisoning
00:52:31from cheap jewelry
00:52:32for the emperor of Japan.
00:52:33Bye.
00:52:34Black Calista
00:52:34from the jewelry industry forever.
00:52:36I bet.
00:52:45I had a really great time tonight.
00:52:47Me too.
00:52:49May I...
00:52:50have a kiss.
00:53:05Something wrong?
00:53:07Do you always have gum in your mouth?
00:53:15Yep.
00:53:16You never have to worry about stinky breath for me.
00:53:28You owe us a bunch of money, Cooper.
00:53:32I don't have any money.
00:53:34How did you pay for this hotel then?
00:53:37I guess you'll only pay up
00:53:41if I break your other leg.
00:53:44Stop!
00:53:48Mr. Vandevilt.
00:53:52Mr. Buffett.
00:53:57This is the contract
00:53:58for the Maple Plaza project.
00:53:59That's right.
00:54:00Miss Musk wanted me to give it to you.
00:54:03I knew Angelo was still in love with me.
00:54:06I knew Angelo was still in love with me.
00:54:08No, no, sir.
00:54:09Sorry about those injuries from earlier.
00:54:11It was all just, uh...
00:54:13just a little misunderstand.
00:54:14Yeah, we could be partners again.
00:54:18And then maybe you can, um...
00:54:20tell, uh...
00:54:21Lady Lockhart
00:54:21to put in a good word for us.
00:54:22Hmm?
00:54:23Angela still loves me.
00:54:25She's just throwing a fit.
00:54:26She'll be back to me soon enough.
00:54:28Yeah.
00:54:28Do you need any help winning her back?
00:54:30We can give you jewelry to give to her.
00:54:33I was just sucking up to these pricks
00:54:35a few days ago,
00:54:36but now they're all begging me
00:54:37to help them out.
00:54:39It feels so damn good
00:54:40to be in power.
00:54:42Huh?
00:54:42Sure.
00:54:43I'll put in a good word for you.
00:54:45I just need...
00:54:47Anything.
00:54:47You tell us,
00:54:48we'll give you anything.
00:54:49Once I take everything
00:54:51from these idiots,
00:54:52I'll go after Angela Lockhart
00:54:55for my revenge.
00:55:02I'll give you the contract
00:55:03to Jared Cooper,
00:55:04just like you asked me to.
00:55:05Well done.
00:55:06He'll be fucked soon.
00:55:09Well done.
00:55:10He'll be fucked soon.
00:55:11I don't get it,
00:55:12Ms. Musk.
00:55:13My contract has a preliminary clause.
00:55:15It requires him to pay
00:55:1650% of the costs
00:55:17up front as a deposit.
00:55:19And if he cared,
00:55:20then what?
00:55:21He'll be bankrupt.
00:55:22So as long as
00:55:23his greeting has to take it.
00:55:26I'm avenging my best friend.
00:55:28I want to show the world
00:55:29that without Angela Lockhart,
00:55:31he's nothing.
00:55:38I signed the Maple Plaza project.
00:55:41We should celebrate.
00:55:42You did?
00:55:43You see,
00:55:44I know my son has it in him.
00:55:46That skank, Angela,
00:55:47is nothing next to you.
00:55:49And it's all thanks
00:55:51to you, sweetheart.
00:55:53Actually,
00:55:53it's thanks to Angela.
00:55:57What?
00:55:59You're trying to ditch me
00:56:00to go back to your wife?
00:56:02Oh, no, no, no, no.
00:56:03He's not.
00:56:04Jared,
00:56:04what are you doing?
00:56:05You have such a beautiful
00:56:07and bright future ahead of you.
00:56:09It's my decision, Mom.
00:56:11I'm the head of the house here.
00:56:14I'm telling my dad.
00:56:15Fine.
00:56:16Go right ahead.
00:56:16He has enough problems himself.
00:56:18If you're obedient,
00:56:19I'll keep you around
00:56:20as his side piece.
00:56:21But if not,
00:56:21you can scram.
00:56:23Dad.
00:56:25Jared is being mean to me.
00:56:27Teach him a lesson.
00:56:28Kaylee,
00:56:28be a good girl, okay?
00:56:30Jared has the backing
00:56:31of some very powerful people now.
00:56:34Don't get on his bad side.
00:56:36We can't afford to piss him off.
00:56:38So do as he says.
00:56:40What?
00:56:40Dad?
00:56:47I'm sorry.
00:56:49Be your side piece.
00:56:52Very good.
00:56:53I'm happy you've come around.
00:56:54Now let's go celebrate.
00:56:58I mean,
00:56:59do I really want to be
00:57:00with Mr. Minty Mouth forever, though?
00:57:03But that tongue action, though.
00:57:05Tongue is important.
00:57:07In more than just one spot.
00:57:08Arlene,
00:57:08we are in public.
00:57:10It's true.
00:57:11Oh,
00:57:12stomach ache.
00:57:13Again?
00:57:14I have to run to the bathroom.
00:57:15Devin should be here
00:57:16to pick you up soon.
00:57:18Okay.
00:57:19Devin's late.
00:57:21Not a good sign for a date.
00:57:25This hotel restaurant
00:57:26has five Michelin stars.
00:57:30It's her.
00:57:31And she's alone
00:57:32with no one to save her.
00:57:36You whore.
00:57:37You seduced my son
00:57:38so he could back with you.
00:57:43Let me tell you,
00:57:45I would never go back
00:57:46even if your entire family
00:57:47got down on their knees
00:57:49and begged me.
00:57:52Hey,
00:57:53you guys can fight all you want,
00:57:54but you need to take this
00:57:55somewhere else.
00:57:56Whoever gets rid of her
00:57:58from me gets all this.
00:57:59What?
00:58:00Why do I have to leave?
00:58:01She's the one starting shit.
00:58:02Because I have money
00:58:04and you don't.
00:58:05You're just a stinky,
00:58:06hippie peddler
00:58:07and my son just signed
00:58:08a $100 billion contract.
00:58:11He still got the contract?
00:58:14Hmm.
00:58:15Must be Ellen's doing.
00:58:16Even if he does sign it,
00:58:18he doesn't have the liquidity
00:58:19to pay the deposit up front.
00:58:21Oh,
00:58:21he's just gonna...
00:58:22Bet you've never seen
00:58:24this much cash before.
00:58:26Bet you've never seen
00:58:27this much cash before.
00:58:31You take my charity
00:58:33and toss it in my face
00:58:34as if it's your own.
00:58:36My maid wouldn't even
00:58:38pick up such a pitiful amount.
00:58:39$1,000 to take her away.
00:58:42$2,000 to drag her away.
00:58:45$5,000 to beat her away.
00:58:51Oh, oh, hey!
00:58:52Hey!
00:58:53Ow, hey!
00:58:57You okay?
00:58:58Are you hurt?
00:59:03Weakling.
00:59:04You!
00:59:05You!
00:59:05Just a few days ago,
00:59:06you found yourself a boy toy
00:59:08right after getting divorced.
00:59:09And now you have two more?
00:59:11What a whore.
00:59:13What a whore.
00:59:14Yeah.
00:59:14And Jared wanted to get back with her?
00:59:17What if she has an STD?
00:59:19Oh, like sleeping with a married man
00:59:21wouldn't give you an STD.
00:59:23Let's go.
00:59:24We'll expose her to Jared.
00:59:26Hang on.
00:59:28What do you want?
00:59:30I'll scream!
00:59:31I don't hit a woman.
00:59:33But I never said I don't kill him.
00:59:36But I never said I don't kill him.
00:59:40Oh, God.
00:59:41He is a murderer.
00:59:42What if he murders me?
00:59:44Not him.
00:59:44Definitely not him.
00:59:50We're not afraid of you.
00:59:52That's enough.
00:59:53This isn't a war zone.
00:59:55You'll be removed from being a five-star general
00:59:57if he hurt a civilian without adequate cause.
00:59:59I was just messing with him.
01:00:01Was he, though?
01:00:03We're not afraid of you.
01:00:05Jared!
01:00:06You have to avenge us.
01:00:07Look at this slut.
01:00:08She's found two more boy toys.
01:00:10She's cheating on you.
01:00:11Don't get back with her.
01:00:13Oh, Mr. Cooper, it's you.
01:00:14I apologize for this scene.
01:00:16I'll toss out the potty crashes immediately
01:00:18so that you can go to his salvation banquet.
01:00:21What did you say?
01:00:21You were going to toss out?
01:00:23What did you say?
01:00:23You were going to toss out?
01:00:25The potty crashes.
01:00:28Oh, you have any idea who that is?
01:00:31That's my wife.
01:00:32Please, save that title for the real skank over there.
01:00:35That's right.
01:00:36Know your place.
01:00:37Shut up.
01:00:38She's cheating on you.
01:00:42Know your place.
01:00:43You're just a side piece.
01:00:44If I still want you, that is.
01:00:46Eric, have you gone mad?
01:00:48This is Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
01:00:50You slap her for this whore?
01:00:52Mom!
01:00:53They really think there's something, huh?
01:00:55Angela's an heiress to a family whose wealth and status goes back to the Victorian age.
01:01:00She's richer even than Ellen Musk.
01:01:02I only got the Maple Plaza project because she gave it to me.
01:01:07What?
01:01:08You, apologize right now, or I will kick you and your father to the curb.
01:01:18I'm sorry.
01:01:20I'm sorry.
01:01:22This can't be.
01:01:23I made you divorce.
01:01:28Go home.
01:01:29You're not suited to come with me to my celebration banquet.
01:01:38I apologize on behalf of my mother.
01:01:41Honey, I know you came here to celebrate my achievements.
01:01:45I promise no one will bother you anymore.
01:01:48I didn't come here for you.
01:01:49So, I'm on a date.
01:01:52A date with two men at the same time?
01:01:56She really is a whore.
01:01:57Angela, please forgive me.
01:01:59I really do love you.
01:02:03Oh-ho!
01:02:04Lady Knockhart is here!
01:02:07Oh-ho!
01:02:08Lady Knockhart is here!
01:02:10Yeah, we already know you beat Ford's effort.
01:02:15We're too old for that.
01:02:17They're here for my celebration banquet.
01:02:19Please, you gave me the contract, so if anyone should go as my guest of honor, it should be you.
01:02:24Oh, yes, please, Ms. Lockhart, join us.
01:02:27We'll all be one happy business family again.
01:02:31What the hell are you all doing here?
01:02:33Where were you?
01:02:35Stomach issues.
01:02:37Again?
01:02:38Would you like my diagnosis?
01:02:39No.
01:02:42Let me make myself clear, okay?
01:02:46I would rather die than be with you again.
01:02:50Seems that they're not actually on good terms.
01:02:53I can't lose face in front of these pricks.
01:02:55Otherwise, they'll cut me off, too.
01:02:57Angela, I know you're still mad, but please give me a chance.
01:03:00I'll prove it to you.
01:03:02You want a chance?
01:03:03Angela, no.
01:03:04You have three great guys here who all want to marry you.
01:03:07Don't take him back.
01:03:09I'll give you two choices.
01:03:13I'll give you two choices.
01:03:17Me.
01:03:18Or the contract.
01:03:20You're kidding me.
01:03:21No.
01:03:22I'm not kidding you.
01:03:23If you choose me, we can remarry this week.
01:03:28But you don't get the $100 billion contract.
01:03:32The choice is all yours.
01:03:34So that's a tough choice.
01:03:36You think so?
01:03:37He either marries a royal heiress or gets a contract that takes his company to the moon.
01:03:41Either way, benefits.
01:03:43Why can't I have both?
01:03:45Why can't I have both?
01:03:45You really are a greedy bastard.
01:03:48Angela, I saved you in the pool, remember?
01:03:50I deserve the contract.
01:03:52Did you really?
01:03:57Look who's fashionably late now.
01:04:00He didn't save her at the pool.
01:04:03Wait, what are you talking about?
01:04:05I, uh, I choose the contract.
01:04:08I knew it.
01:04:09You'll get what's coming to you.
01:04:12With this contract, my company's earning potential is limitless.
01:04:16Angela Lockhart, you humiliated me in front of everyone.
01:04:20I will get you one day.
01:04:22Let me show you something.
01:04:34You saved me.
01:04:40You saved me.
01:04:42I'm sorry if his lies led to you wasting three years of your life.
01:04:49But I promise you, I'm going to make it up to you with the rest of our lives.
01:04:54No, no, I wasn't lying.
01:04:56I just couldn't, can't remember exactly what happened that day.
01:05:07Does that mean we both each saved her once?
01:05:11What?
01:05:12Me?
01:05:13Dr. Wilson losing at saving people?
01:05:16No way.
01:05:16You guys, one of you, do something life-threatening right now.
01:05:21You're crazy.
01:05:23And actually, they've all been doing horrible shit behind your back.
01:05:28What?
01:05:31Mr. Sterling had me investigate their company's dealings.
01:05:34Turns out they've been fudging the numbers on your shared accounts and contracts.
01:05:38Put it simply, they've been stealing from you.
01:05:41I can't believe I didn't realize.
01:05:44Ms. Lockhart, I'm so sorry.
01:05:46I should have had third-party accountants check thoroughly.
01:05:49No, it's not your fault.
01:05:50They're just too slick.
01:05:52Would you like me to punish them?
01:05:54Oh, God.
01:05:55No.
01:05:55Not that again.
01:05:56Please.
01:05:57Max.
01:05:59You know what to do.
01:06:12The banks have pulled all of our funds.
01:06:15All business ties have been severed.
01:06:17We're bankrupt!
01:06:23How did you do that?
01:06:25Who are you?
01:06:26And don't say Spider-Man!
01:06:30I'll tell you who I am.
01:06:33I'll tell you who I am.
01:06:38I am Crypto-Punk number two!
01:06:41What did he say he was?
01:06:43That's more bizarre than Spider-Man!
01:06:46You're Crypto-Punk number two?
01:06:49Well, I'm Crypto-Punk number one.
01:06:51See?
01:06:52You are number one at something.
01:06:53The most expensive NFT collection in the world.
01:06:56Forget Forbes' list.
01:06:59It's all about young money now.
01:07:00So, how about our date?
01:07:08I'm not letting them one-up me on this one.
01:07:11I'll spy two.
01:07:25They forgot to cancel my contract.
01:07:28I still have the $100 billion project.
01:07:32Yes!
01:07:33I'm rich!
01:07:35They make them okay soon!
01:07:42What?
01:07:44Mr. Cooper, sir.
01:07:45The Maple Plaza contract requires us to provide 50% of the costs up front.
01:07:49Otherwise, it's a breach of contract and we'll have to pay for all financial repercussions.
01:07:54No!
01:07:55I'm bankrupt!
01:07:58I'm bankrupt!
01:07:59I'm just a little off-card.
01:08:00You tricked me!
01:08:06Oh, allow me.
01:08:10I'm sorry I was late, my queen.
01:08:12I had to get some very important materials for our special date.
01:08:18Well, cheers.
01:08:21Cheers.
01:08:22Cheers.
01:08:30Cheers.
01:08:31This looks good.
01:08:36Did you use my spices?
01:08:38I know your ex-in-law's never appreciated you.
01:08:43You can have all the money and power in the world and you still can't force a man to love
01:08:48you.
01:08:49No tenemos mi el divorcio.
01:08:56Angel...
01:08:58tu futuro...
01:09:00con mi...
01:09:03es va a ser diferente.
01:09:05Ven.
01:09:06La bestia!
01:09:27¡Suscríbete al canal!
01:09:48How is all of this possible?
01:09:51I didn't meet any of you until recently.
01:09:54Well, actually, maybe Devin, but...
01:09:58I've had a crush on you since college.
01:10:01You're my motivation to go to business school.
01:10:05Despite who you were, you never judged me for being poor.
01:10:11Are you trying to get hired at Fortune 500 in a suit like that?
01:10:19All you do is babble on and all about Internet money, Bitcoin, and shit like that.
01:10:27Are you trying to steal my spot?
01:10:31How did you bless you?
01:10:34Hey! Get away from me!
01:10:36Angela!
01:10:39Feisty girl.
01:10:40I like her.
01:10:51How is he?
01:10:53It's a rare poison made from a mixture of dried roots found in Africa.
01:10:57Astaga, saltip.
01:10:58Can it be cured?
01:11:00I actually think I know that poison.
01:11:02It sounds really scary, but its cure can actually be found in any developed country.
01:11:06Household salt.
01:11:15I like her.
01:11:17There you go.
01:11:19What time is it?
01:11:22Oh, shoot.
01:11:24I'm late for swim practice.
01:11:32I like her.
01:11:33We have been rivals ever since.
01:11:36So, that's how I...
01:11:38Well, we...
01:11:40all met.
01:11:41I barely remember.
01:11:43Should I never let you go to swim practice that day?
01:11:46Matthew Richards, the guy who poisoned me, attacked you out of revenge.
01:11:51You wouldn't have known.
01:11:52I did hear he dropped out and became a loan shark, though.
01:11:54That makes you feel any better.
01:11:56Yeah, I think that suits him a little better.
01:11:59Angela, your seven days is almost up.
01:12:02Now that you know they all loved and fought for you for three years,
01:12:06who will you pick?
01:12:11How can that be?
01:12:13Angela Lockhart is an heiress?
01:12:20Kaylee, we've gone bankrupt.
01:12:24Bankrupt?
01:12:26The Vanderbilt's have gone bankrupt?
01:12:29Well then, get out of here.
01:12:31You can't do this to me.
01:12:36Jared!
01:12:37Mom, it's me.
01:12:38What happened?
01:12:40Jared, I have carefully reconsidered.
01:12:43Angela is way better than this dimwit.
01:12:45You should get back with your wife.
01:12:47We're bankrupt.
01:12:49What?
01:12:53Jared Cooper.
01:12:56We are here to propose your belongings.
01:13:00No one is going to save you now.
01:13:02What?
01:13:04What?
01:13:04No!
01:13:05No!
01:13:06No!
01:13:06No!
01:13:07No!
01:13:07No!
01:13:08What kind of an asshole throws his own mother to the dogs?
01:13:14Who will you pick?
01:13:18I...
01:13:23I brought you fried chicken?
01:13:24Fried chicken?
01:13:26Hey, not all girls like sushi and caviar.
01:13:28Yeah, he's right.
01:13:29I did live in Atlanta for three months.
01:13:31Sucking up last minute!
01:13:33At least I don't speak like an AI robot.
01:13:36Hey, stop.
01:13:37Stop.
01:13:39Welcome back to The Bachelorette.
01:13:41I mean, the three badasses who want me.
01:13:44I mean, Angela Lockhart, you know what I mean.
01:13:50Today, our heiress bachelorette will choose which one of our three badasses will she marry.
01:13:56Will it be Shane, the doctor, Cole, the general, or Devin, the CEO?
01:14:10Uh, looks like our bachelorette may need a little more time to decide.
01:14:14Oh, the suspense is killing me.
01:14:17But when she does, she will take this eternal rose made from glass imported from Venice and give it to
01:14:25our winner.
01:14:26Angela.
01:14:29Angela.
01:14:31Oh, I, uh, I need more time to think.
01:14:39Uh, while our bachelorette takes a little time to decide, why don't we check in with each of our candidates?
01:14:46Let's check in with each of our candidates.
01:14:49Let's start with Cole.
01:14:51Cole.
01:14:55There's not much to say.
01:14:57Who wouldn't want a five-star general who has huge biceps, a massive chest, who would protect their life?
01:15:08Okay.
01:15:09Thank you.
01:15:10Uh, Shane?
01:15:13Muscles, money, they'll only get you so far.
01:15:18But you need a well-balanced man like me that has more than one way to keep a lady happy,
01:15:23if you know what I mean.
01:15:27Okay.
01:15:28I think we do.
01:15:29And Devin.
01:15:32That was quite disgusting.
01:15:36I just hope Angela's okay.
01:15:38I know she's going under a lot of stress right now, a lot of choices to make.
01:15:43And she's my queen.
01:15:45I just really hope she's okay.
01:15:47And then one more thing.
01:15:49What kind of a doctor brings fried chicken to a girl?
01:15:54That's a good point.
01:15:55It's bad for her heart.
01:15:58And then you.
01:15:59What?
01:16:00You know what they say about military men.
01:16:03They beat their wives.
01:16:09Enough!
01:16:11Stand up!
01:16:14Hey, you guys.
01:16:16Whoa, break it up.
01:16:18Hey, break it up.
01:16:20Oh!
01:16:24Cut to commercial.
01:16:26Cut to commercial.
01:16:42Cut to commercial.
01:16:45This is the hardest decision I've ever had to make in my entire life.
01:16:50Cut to commercial.
01:16:50Who do I choose?
01:16:59Angela's marrying me.
01:17:00You're not stealing her from me.
01:17:01Oh yeah?
01:17:03No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
01:17:32No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
01:18:17We may have to work together to take him down.
01:18:30This battle within our heads is the most intense I've ever experienced.
01:18:34I may not be able to take them both down if they decide to team up.
01:18:38Hmm.
01:18:39Winter mint or cool mint?
01:18:45You know, I've always really liked your hair.
01:18:49Really?
01:18:50I'm actually pretty self-conscious about it.
01:18:54So I appreciate that.
01:18:56Hey, hey, hey.
01:18:57And you know, cool.
01:18:59Avar is really like the way you talk.
01:19:02Really?
01:19:03Yeah.
01:19:04Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:19:07What do you got for me?
01:19:08I always really like the way you chew gum.
01:19:12Yeah?
01:19:13Yeah.
01:19:13It's fresh, right?
01:19:14Yeah.
01:19:17You know, you're actually a really good doctor.
01:19:20Yeah, I appreciate it.
01:19:21I'll take you out.
01:19:21And if you need me to look at you, I got you.
01:19:23I need you.
01:19:24Yeah, cool.
01:19:25Angela's been kidnapped.
01:19:27Angela's been kidnapped.
01:19:29It was Jared Cooper.
01:19:31That fucker!
01:19:32We have to find her.
01:19:34What the hell?
01:19:34Her ring.
01:19:35Her dad installed a GPS tracking mechanism on her ring just in case.
01:19:39Well, let's go then.
01:19:40My old!
01:19:41My fiance!
01:19:42My fiance!
01:19:49Jared.
01:19:53What am I doing here?
01:19:55You destroyed me.
01:19:59They took everything.
01:20:02What?
01:20:02I have nothing left.
01:20:05It's not my fault.
01:20:06You're too greedy.
01:20:08I was greedy to have sex with my wife.
01:20:11What?
01:20:12I'm not your wife anymore!
01:20:14Oh, yeah, I know.
01:20:15You wouldn't take me back now.
01:20:16Not unless I get you pregnant with my child.
01:20:18This is illegal!
01:20:19You wouldn't want your child to be away from its father.
01:20:22You won't have me arrested.
01:20:24You will take me back.
01:20:27Ow!
01:20:28I'm not a bitch.
01:20:31I'll settle you down a little.
01:20:41You will be begging me to fuck you soon.
01:20:45Hey!
01:20:48Angela!
01:20:48Come here!
01:20:52You're too late!
01:20:54I drugged her.
01:20:55She'll be dead soon unless...
01:20:56Oh, yeah?
01:20:57Have you forgotten who I am?
01:20:59He really does have everything here, Coach.
01:21:01Everything except for...
01:21:03Yeah, except for fruit-
01:21:03Flavor gum.
01:21:04Get it already.
01:21:05Just save my boss.
01:21:08Here you go.
01:21:14You're all good now.
01:21:15Oh, thank God.
01:21:17But what do we do with that piece of shit?
01:21:20What?
01:21:20What are you going to do to me?
01:21:22Hey, stop!
01:21:23No!
01:21:23Don't...
01:21:26Enjoy your erectile dysfunction forever.
01:21:33Why'd we didn't actually have that fight?
01:21:35Turns out he's the most dangerous of them all.
01:21:43So who did you pick, sweetheart?
01:21:46You've invited the most important figures of the world to your wedding,
01:21:49the Prince of Bhutan.
01:21:51And remember, we will kill ourselves if you don't choose.
01:21:59Welcome back to the finale of
01:22:01The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:22:04We're down to the wire, literally, the wedding day.
01:22:07But who's the groom?
01:22:20Welcome back to the finale of
01:22:23The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:22:25But who's the groom?
01:22:29Uh, seems our era still hasn't decided.
01:22:34Any input from the parents?
01:22:35Maybe that will help sway our bachelorette's choice.
01:22:39Oh, this is exciting.
01:22:41Who should my daughter pick?
01:22:44Let me think.
01:22:48I like the doctor.
01:22:50He's cute.
01:22:53But the general looks like a strong fellow.
01:22:57And we can't forget about Devin Sterling,
01:22:59the one who's loved her the longest.
01:23:01Isn't that right, Devin?
01:23:02Angela.
01:23:10You are all three very fine gentlemen.
01:23:15And I'm really grateful for all of your love.
01:23:20But this was a really hard decision.
01:23:23And I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:23:29And I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:23:36I'm just kidding.
01:23:37I'm just as sick of this as you guys are.
01:23:43Each of our candidates have saved our main character.
01:23:46I mean, bachelorette, once.
01:23:49They've all proven their undying love.
01:23:52So who gets to unlock Angela Lockhart's heart?
01:23:55Literally.
01:23:57Could it be the sexy and protective,
01:24:01general with a temper,
01:24:03Mr. Cole Eisenhower?
01:24:09Or the fun, wicked-minded,
01:24:13but kind of weird,
01:24:15Dr. Shane Wilson?
01:24:19And last but not least,
01:24:21could it be the richest man of them all?
01:24:24The man Angela would have married a long time ago,
01:24:27Mr. Devin Sterling.
01:24:31Gentlemen,
01:24:33it's been a pleasure getting to know you.
01:24:35All right, guys.
01:24:36May the best man win.
01:24:38May the best man win.
01:24:41Drum roll, please.
01:24:56Seriously, Ricky?
01:25:06I choose...
01:25:15I need a powerful, strong man,
01:25:17and you're willing to feel like you can protect me.
01:25:21Who could resist those guns?
01:25:25Would they interest you in an NFD, Ellen?
01:25:28Do you like full-body check-up?
01:25:29Who could you do that?
01:25:43Shane, it's you.
01:25:45I'm lovesick for you.
01:25:47You like that minty flavor, don't you?
01:25:48Yeah.
01:25:51Es esa actitud de acción, señoras y señas.
01:25:54¡Ella! ¡Be mi nueva queen!
01:25:56¡Vamos a ver qué podemos construir juntos!
01:25:58¡Vamos, babe!
01:26:10¡Has siempre sido tú!
01:26:21¡Ella!
01:26:21Always love you.
01:26:24Let's give it up for those nine inches, everybody.
01:26:28Would you like a full body checkup?
01:26:30Have you seen my murderer weapons?
01:26:31I need fruit flavor gum for you.
01:26:49Wee to unENDED
01:26:58Much love of you.
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