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My Dad Is Poseidon - FULL - Reelshort
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00:13Slow-ass sea slug! Your launch today, beach!
00:30Slow!
00:30Slow-ass sea slug!
00:35Slow-ass sea slug!
01:03Filthy scavengers, when Lord Poseidon ruled the Deep, you Skyrats swore never to breach
01:09the surface. Poseidon? Fish food ages ago.
01:40Sire, Zeus' people just breached your outer barrier.
01:44I'm retired, don't bring that crap to my door.
01:50Sire!
02:07Who the hell broke my new console?
02:09I'm gonna go deal with that bastard!
02:12Sire! You're finally stepping in!
02:28Go fight somewhere else, don't block me from clearing my game.
02:32My king! Even Poseidon himself would still be fit to shine my boots!
02:58What did you do? Turn me back right now!
03:06Sire! The entire Abyssal Realm awaits your command!
03:09Lead us against Olympus! We beg you!
03:12Zeus' brain's probably been eaten out by Clamadia for years.
03:15I'm retired. I don't waste breath on crazy people.
03:25Screw power struggles. Rotting in bed playing games is the real way to live.
03:34Fight!
03:42Get your hands off me, creep!
03:44Sorry! I didn't mean to-
03:50Wait. Pointy ears. A dryage? What's a forest nintz doing here?
03:59He's just a regular human. A total nerd.
04:02Damn it. The Aphrodisians kicking in.
04:14You're burning up down here. Way harder than I pictured.
04:19I was drugged. This whole thing is Dylan's sick setup. If I don't mate someone before the timer runs out,
04:26I die. I really need this guy.
04:34Goddamn. You really know how to flip my switch.
04:46I need more. A lot more.
04:55Don't stop. Harder. Squeeze me tighter.
05:01Oh!
05:07What the hell did you do to me last night?
05:12Hey. I put in a lot of work. Don't tell me you forgot.
05:15What?
05:15Leora! I know you're in there! Nowhere left to run!
05:19Damn it. He tracked me.
05:35Leora. You're my fiancé. You belong with me. Come home.
05:39Get away! Dylan!
05:43As the leader of the Satyr, you actually drugged me.
05:50Why the fuck are you wearing some dude's shirt?
05:54You slept with someone?
05:56WHO SCREWED UP MY PLAN?!
06:01Oh, so you're the genius who roofed her.
06:03Newsflash, tough guy. Real men don't need tricks.
06:06You talking to the boss like that, punk?
06:14So you're the loser who ruined everything?
06:17You actually fucked this beach bomb shut in?!
06:26Touch him again and you'll regret it.
06:29Her body's tainted now, but her blood still has value. Can't push too hard yet.
06:35I won't kill him, but you're coming with me, Leora.
06:41Babe, if you don't want to go, I can handle this clown.
06:50Forget today ever happened. Go back to your life.
07:06Seriously? Can't I just play my game for once?
07:20Those assholes are back already.
07:22What are you talking about?!
07:29Hey, pencil neck! I'm Dylan's top enforcer.
07:32Either get the hell out of this water, or kneel and call me daddy.
07:36Dylan who? Speak up, man. My ears are shot.
07:38Keep acting tough!
07:39Jax can stomp boulders to dust!
07:42Even Nereus' sea folk give him a wide burn!
07:57You asked for this.
08:11You one-shotted pants top an orcer?! Who the hell are you?!
08:16Who the hell are you?!
08:26Asshole. Using my divine power to barbecue. Hope you die alone and miserable.
08:32What are you whining about?
08:35Nothing!
08:35Heat's too low. Sprinkle this and baste it again.
08:43Molly? Gods make heroes with it, you seasoned food?
08:50Huh. Tide barrier just got tripped.
08:59Mommy, is daddy's station way out in the deep sea? Is that why he never comes to see me?
09:05Yeah, baby. But he retired recently. We're gonna find him now.
09:18I'm badly wounded. I don't have much time. Find Lily's real father. Leave her with him. I just hope you
09:26two can live in peace.
09:30Far away from those bastards on Mount Olympus.
09:46There it is.
09:54Liara's wounded bad. Drag them both back to the Dillon. Lifetime of easy living.
10:04What the hell was that?
10:06Nothing. Just swapped a bug.
10:12That girl from five years ago. You came looking for me?
10:17She's your daughter.
10:19We need you now.
10:22So you're my dad? You're actually pretty handsome.
10:26This aura? She's got my blood.
10:34Who did this?
10:36Don't worry about it. Just keep Lily safe.
10:44Mommy? Mommy!
11:03It's too late, boss. Her heartbeat's fading fast.
11:21Somebody help me!
11:35Give me a name, Liara. Who did this? I'm going to tear them apart.
11:42It was...
11:43...
11:47...
11:55...
11:55...
11:56...
11:58...
12:03...
12:04Your father sold you to me a long time ago. You're my fiancé, my property.
12:08you filthy whore spread your legs for some stray dog but at least your bloodline is still worth
12:18something no let go with nymph blood in my veins even olympus will bow to me
12:39i got careless diving near a shipwreck my fault shipwreck those cuts are surgical leora
12:48someone did this to you you're just a regular guy stay out of it boss soup's ready
13:04if i don't make it promise me you'll take care of lily she's all we have left she's safe now
13:13drink
13:16soup isn't gonna fix this jack
13:24jack you ambrosia residue golden apple sap i studied this in grad's time greek meth said
13:33it could raise the dead for mortals where the hell did you get this more try it
13:50these ingredients where did you get them
13:58it's my first time meeting daddy i gotta find the prettiest shell for him
14:26what a lively little snack gulp you down and my power doubles
14:40i just fished this stuff out of the bay you want more i've got a ton of it laying around
14:45this guy's luck is insane
14:50a random mortal just happens to have relics of the old gods
14:55is this coast a secret olympian vault you're safe here liria
15:02we've got a kid together now i'm not letting anything touch you or lily
15:10jack i'm grateful but i
15:12daddy help
15:16something's trying to eat me
15:19lily's in trouble
15:26i i'm not tasty my mommy and daddy are super strong please don't eat me
15:37divine power runs through this girl devour you and i might even claim the sea king's throne
15:45no
15:47Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
16:01Oof
16:19you disgusting freak what do you think you're doing to my daughter mommy
16:26i've got you baby touch my kid again and i'll rip her head off your shoulders
16:34ha you ruined my meal
16:39wait the baby mama herself perfect
16:48two courses for the price of one
16:57bitch
17:03jack take lily and run go
17:11run from the lucian hydro you pathetic little insects
17:22you posei that kid's his no wonder the power's so pure that's poseidon's bloodline if i stay i'm dead
17:40what the hell just happened it ran damn lioya your powers are badass you straight up scared the monster
17:48off me no way even at full strength i couldn't take that thing i'm still recovering
17:56wait maybe it sensed the guardian of the sea vault
18:01whatever let's get home that thing might circle back
18:08about that monster
18:14failed at the perfect time figures he's just a regular guy after all
18:37still there's actually a good man to have a problem
18:37i have to be a psychosa
18:38i don't know if you come back home
18:38right now
18:38for this episode is this episode of the game
18:38and i think i saw you see or have to be seen
18:38that's how i have to drink
18:38that's what i have to ruin
18:41that's why i'll put it in my car
18:41because i can't do a good night
18:42i hope you did a lot of money
18:48that's why my daughter is a good night
18:59my liege have mercy i didn't know she was your daughter i swear it i please spare my life
19:06no problem thank you my lord thank you for your mercy try to remember that in your next life
19:24enjoying the show
19:35my king we had nothing to do with the hydra we swear listen to me if any of you take
19:42one step
19:42near my daughter again i will skin you alive now get the out of my sight yes yes my leash
20:02my love since you refused to tell me who did this to you i'll just have to dig up the
20:08truth myself
20:17that wild god pan's always pulling power grabs but poseidon guy's long gone probably fish food in
20:25some trench right sea god myth ancient history wanna bet there ain't no sea king anymore
20:42the world's the same as ever the dead are louder than the living
20:47who the hell are you you're in haides territory asshole
21:13is haides still breathing if he is tell him to get his ass out here
21:21who the fuck is tearing up my domain
21:29i don't have time for this i'm not wasting it on you i need a background check
21:39you know who i am hades is ace you crash my spot you die here
22:07little fish
22:16hated staff one shot the sea king he's real
22:23haides you hiding come out or this whole place turns into driftwood
22:31one two
22:36thank the fates the boss is here
22:43boss this bum
22:51you idiot piss off the lord of the oceans and we all drown
22:54you're done get out in front of poseidon your ants i'm saving your worthless heights
23:06my lord is this handling satisfactory i'm not here for fun dig up everything on that leora
23:13and her daughter understood i'll mobilize every team right now you have three days i'll be back
23:27everyone drop what you're doing full sweep on the leora and child every resource every contact
23:33now tell them poseidon's back
23:43poseidon's back let's hope this time he doesn't flood the place just to make a point
23:55dylan wants the woman dead kid comes with us alive she's still hurt easy pickets
24:01let's move
24:14we'll make a nice stew surprise daddy for lunch
24:23a forest nymph playing happy home mater pathetic
24:31who are you dylan's orders come quietly to the stronghold or i drag your corpse back
24:39mommy who's the ugly goat man hand over the kid
24:52stay away from my daughter don't you dare touch her
25:12mommy you're bleeding this forest is locked down surrender now i'll go with you
25:20on one condition let my daughter go no mommy i'm not leaving you
25:37kids mine you die
25:47my poison fog the more you fight the faster it rots you from the inside
25:52give up
25:54you've gone too far even if i die today i'm not letting you win
26:02you're wounded poisoned done the kids coming with me
26:11don't touch her come at me feisty one dylan wants you dead but first i'm gonna have some fun
26:27such a pretty face all mine now
26:34let my mommy go you bastard
26:43lily lily run get out of here
26:51serve me well and i might let her run a little longer
27:15you're hands off her
27:24you touch my woman you're a dead man
27:33jack what the hell just happened
27:39you okay babe so you're the boyfriend too bad i'll snap every bone in your body with one hand
28:02jack keep lily safe long as i'm here you don't lose shut up and go now
28:20if i pull this vine the whole cliff goes with us demon
28:25run all you want my pack tears you both apart
28:29run all you want
28:30run all you want
28:40run all you want
29:19Daddy, don't leave mommy.
29:21I don't want to lose her.
29:23Shh, Lily, don't cry.
29:25Daddy promises mommy's going to be okay.
29:27We're going back for her right now.
29:35Hand over the kid.
29:37I'll make your death quick.
29:46Lily, turn around and cover your ears, okay?
29:52Daddy's going to do a little magic trick.
29:55Okay.
29:59You are the best.
30:09Some nobody dare stare me down?
30:11You're asking to die.
30:15You're not human.
30:17Who the hell are you?
30:18My daughter's here, so I'm keeping it clean.
30:22Disappear.
30:41Okay, Lily.
30:42Lily, you can turn around now.
30:47Daddy?
30:48What happened to the bad guy?
30:50He got so dazzled by how cute you are, he just passed out.
31:00Lily, stay right here inside this circle.
31:02Don't move.
31:03Daddy's going to help mommy beat the bad guys.
31:06I'll be right back.
31:11Daddy, be careful.
31:14Don't worry, Lily.
31:16No one's ever beaten your dad.
31:24That poison's eating you alive, little nymph.
31:26How much longer you got?
31:28Let me have my fun first.
31:31So what?
31:33I'll drag you to hell with me before I die.
31:46Damn.
31:47You take a hit well.
31:49Let's enjoy this body.
31:52Then, I'll turn you into my eternal trophy.
31:55For Jack and Lily.
31:57Even if I die, I'm taking this beast down with me.
32:02No signal?
32:03You trying to hog the glory?
32:05More coming.
32:06Killing one won't save Jack and Lily.
32:08No choice.
32:09I'm taking them down with me.
32:11This the woman Dylan wants?
32:12Where the kid?
32:14Some guy took the brat.
32:17Useless.
32:18Grab her first, then we hunt the child.
32:24Just let Jack and Lily be safe.
32:30You all want to come at once?
32:32Then die together.
32:33Pick your graves.
32:46Why did you come back?
32:48Where's Lily?
32:52Lily's safe.
32:54Don't push yourself.
32:57So this is the woman's secret lover.
33:00Her taste is trash.
33:02Beg now.
33:04And maybe I'll leave your corpses in one piece.
33:07Refuse, and you'll be screaming.
33:10End it fast.
33:13You, in our eyes, you're not even an enemy.
33:17Just weeds to be crushed under feet.
33:20Just hold on a little longer.
33:23Jack means more to me than anything.
33:25I won't let him get hurt.
33:36You want my husband?
33:38Step over my corpse first!
33:41In a hurry to die?
33:43Fine!
33:44I'll oblige!
34:13You're half dead already!
34:15How the hell did you knock me back?
34:18The sea is sinking.
34:19Those are Poseidon's warriors.
34:22This...
34:23can't be.
34:48Ancient Ekethra!
34:50The Coastal Legend monster?
34:53Why would she be here?
34:56Ha ha ha!
34:58Our boss has real backing!
34:59He summoned three of Poseidon's elite guards!
35:02No matter how strong you are, kneel and beg!
35:06They're coming for us.
35:08We're finished.
35:09Don't worry, darling.
35:10Things might turn around.
35:11Lyra Vale has been captured.
35:14Now we await the Sea King's warriors to execute this peasant.
35:19They're here for me!
35:21Jack, stay behind me!
35:23With me here, no one touches you.
35:25Stop saying that, Jack!
35:27Look around!
35:27We're surrounded!
35:28We could actually die here!
35:35My lords!
35:37Let me teach this adulterous couple a lesson!
35:43You worthless creature!
35:46You shouldn't even exist where I stand!
35:56Who dares show such insolence before the Lord of the Sea?
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