- 2 days ago
Sex Education By My Best Friend Db
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:04New Intimacy Level Unlocked
00:00:11New Skin Dangerously Hot is Equipped
00:00:20You're staring. You like what you see?
00:00:23Maybe.
00:00:32When are you gonna tell me who you really are?
00:00:34You know who I really am. I'm Valaqueen33.
00:00:37Such a dumb username.
00:00:39Oh, okay guacamolewizard275. Don't talk to me about dumb usernames.
00:00:44You know, you're lucky you're cute.
00:00:45You don't even know what I look like.
00:00:47Well, I would if you agreed to meet me in person. Or at least a photo.
00:00:52Maybe someday.
00:00:57Crap, I'm late.
00:00:59Good luck, Skylacher Queen.
00:01:03Who needs luck when I have my talisman to remind me of my knight?
00:01:11In the game of Castle Claimers, I might be a warrior princess in love with a dashing knight.
00:01:16But on my first day at Edmunds Academy, I feel like a peasant.
00:01:21Watch it! This isn't public school.
00:01:25Forget your training wheels.
00:01:28At least I have my knight's charm to help me get through the day.
00:01:42Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop the car!
00:01:46No!
00:01:48God, my knight's special talisman!
00:01:51It's ruined!
00:01:58He's so hot!
00:01:59Hey! I told you to stop the car!
00:02:06Oh my god, he's cold!
00:02:07He's so hot!
00:02:12Hey!
00:02:14What is wrong with you?
00:02:15Didn't you see me yelling and screaming for you to stop the car?
00:02:18Okay, I see you now, new girl.
00:02:20What are you with me, son?
00:02:22What are you talking about?
00:02:24Why?
00:02:26I thought you were one of my fans.
00:02:28No, I'm not one of your fans!
00:02:31You just broke something that's really important to me!
00:02:34Yeah, I break a lot of hearts, buttercup.
00:02:36Okay?
00:02:39You should know that.
00:02:40I don't know who you are, but you were a...
00:02:43You were a...
00:02:47Asshole!
00:02:52Alright.
00:02:53I broke something of yours.
00:02:56Sure, but...
00:02:57Hey!
00:02:58You got my attention.
00:03:01So, in that case, we're even.
00:03:09Don't do it, Hayley.
00:03:12Have a good day.
00:03:15Don't do it!
00:03:17I got a hot mess energy.
00:03:20Hey!
00:03:23Oh, fuck!
00:03:25Now we're even.
00:03:27My last thought better not be broken!
00:03:29I can't lose my connection to Valley Queen.
00:03:36You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:39You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:41I'm going to make every classroom, every hallway, and every rumor in this school your personal nightmare.
00:03:50I'm gonna make her watch a living hell.
00:03:53What's going on?
00:03:54Close fighting the new girl.
00:03:56Close leaving the new girl.
00:03:58Yeah, idiot.
00:03:58I can see that.
00:04:01Just met an unhinged person.
00:04:03Good thing the universe balances it with you.
00:04:06Same.
00:04:07Ran into a certified asshole.
00:04:09Can't wait to see you in the game tonight.
00:04:14Cole, do you need help?
00:04:15I can help you.
00:04:18The new girl poured coffee on him.
00:04:20This bitch thinks that she can just roll up and piss off Michael.
00:04:23But he's not your Cole.
00:04:24Shut up, Lindsay.
00:04:26He's not yet.
00:04:30Hi!
00:04:32I'm Jen.
00:04:33And this is Lindsay.
00:04:35Hi.
00:04:36I'm Hailey.
00:04:37So nice to meet you.
00:04:38You have first day jitters.
00:04:39It's totally understandable.
00:04:41We want to make sure you feel really welcome.
00:04:43And so we'll take you to your locker.
00:04:44Come in.
00:04:46Okay.
00:04:46Let's go.
00:04:51There you go.
00:04:52Thanks so much.
00:05:14Aw, you're welcome, new girl.
00:05:16Honestly, it's kind of an improvement on your face.
00:05:24Guacamole wizard.
00:05:26Guacamole wizard.
00:05:26What are you, catfishing some little lonely online gamer boy?
00:05:30I'm giving back.
00:05:32Hold on.
00:05:34Hey, if you go to Edmunds Academy, you should come to Locker 83 right now.
00:05:38Send.
00:05:39Here.
00:05:40Now your little gamer friend can see your ugly little face.
00:05:44So when can I meet the hero who ruined your billionaire shirt?
00:05:47I'm your friend first, Max.
00:05:49At least check on me.
00:05:50Oh, is it the online love-up?
00:05:52Ah, chill.
00:05:53Please.
00:05:56No way.
00:05:58What is it?
00:05:59Oh, that'll clean goes to the school.
00:06:06Please ignore that.
00:06:08Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:06:10Send.
00:06:15What is wrong with you?
00:06:16You mess with Cole Edmunds, and you're gonna mess with me.
00:06:19Edmunds?
00:06:20What?
00:06:21You don't know that his family owns the whole school?
00:06:24Wow.
00:06:24You really did crawl out of the gutter, didn't you?
00:06:28Stop recording me!
00:06:31Jen is a new girl.
00:06:33Wait.
00:06:34Is the new girl...
00:06:35Valley Queen?
00:06:38There's no way the new girl is Valley Queen.
00:06:40Could it be...
00:06:41Jen?
00:06:44Ew.
00:06:48Your enemy is our enemy, Cole.
00:06:50And I just made sure that the new girl knows that.
00:06:53No chance it's Jen.
00:06:55So is it...
00:06:56She does look kinda cute.
00:07:05Please ignore that.
00:07:06Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:07:09What was I thinking?
00:07:11Of course she's not my online lover.
00:07:16Hey there, buttercup.
00:07:18Keep walking, Hayley.
00:07:20Just keep walking.
00:07:21You got a problem with shaving this morning, or...?
00:07:24My name's Hayley.
00:07:26Well, Hayley.
00:07:28I think you, uh...
00:07:29It means to spell on your upper lip right there.
00:07:34What a coincidence!
00:07:35So did you!
00:07:36Hell no!
00:07:40Oh, I'm sorry.
00:07:41I forgot you don't even need shaving cream.
00:07:44You're just a man-child with follicle issues.
00:07:49If your liver ends up with her, I must have failed an eye exam.
00:07:51Yeah.
00:08:04I was so relieved to see you.
00:08:06Something happened and I lost the game.
00:08:08I thought I'd never see you again.
00:08:11I think it's time we call this what it is.
00:08:14And what is this?
00:08:15What I think it is, is...
00:08:17I wanna be with you, and you wanna be with me.
00:08:22As more than just friends.
00:08:24Oh, thank God.
00:08:26I honestly want that more than anything.
00:08:28You're my soulmate.
00:08:29Like, I like you so much.
00:08:30Okay, well, since we're dating now, um...
00:08:34I'm ready to send my photo.
00:08:37Wait, really?
00:08:38Yeah.
00:08:39Get ready.
00:08:45Okay.
00:08:47No face.
00:08:48Just the boobs.
00:08:50Is it a bad idea?
00:08:51But all my online friends said it's cool.
00:08:54PG-13 nudes are harmless.
00:08:56All the kids do this.
00:08:57You'll love it.
00:09:02Ugh, this lighting hates me.
00:09:04Come on, Hayley.
00:09:06Confidence.
00:09:07You literally fight dragons online.
00:09:13Okay.
00:09:14Yeah.
00:09:15That's actually kind of...
00:09:20Oh my God.
00:09:22Seriously?
00:09:23Hello?
00:09:24Anyone?
00:09:26Don't look at me!
00:09:30Don't look at me!
00:09:31We're trying not for viable, are we?
00:09:33I don't think you're supposed to do it like that.
00:09:35Get out!
00:09:37Now!
00:09:37Fine.
00:09:39Ow!
00:09:40Damn it!
00:09:44Come on.
00:09:45I'll see you soon.
00:09:47You, you too.
00:09:50I haven't.
00:09:51I'll know.
00:09:52Oh, man.
00:09:53I'm so sorry.
00:09:55You're wrong.
00:09:55I'll tell you now, you go!
00:09:56But...
00:10:05Aah!
00:10:17you're helping me
00:10:18yeah well i didn't point on it but here we are
00:10:28excuse you these boobs are for someone else
00:10:30i don't know boyfriend do we that is shocking
00:10:33yeah actually and he'd probably kill you right now if you saw you were flirting with me
00:10:38flirting yeah don't lie to yourself i've got a girlfriend too
00:10:40my thoughts and prayers to her
00:10:42funny
00:10:44okay well can we just pretend this didn't happen and go our separate ways
00:10:48fine by me
00:10:51oh and um
00:10:54with all the purple bra by the way i like it in a weird way
00:10:58you're not in my type but you know power theory
00:11:01would you just get out of here
00:11:11hopefully guacamole wizard will like it too
00:11:15jen red alert
00:11:16cole and the new girl are for sure flirting
00:11:19i think it's time to take drastic action
00:11:23don't be a coward
00:11:24just send it
00:11:25jen
00:11:30oh my god here goes nothing
00:11:40still no response don't freak out he's probably just busy
00:11:48give it back
00:11:49why you don't want me to see your slutty little nude
00:11:53oh this is actually a really good photo
00:11:54honestly it's so good that i think the whole school should see it
00:11:58did you get it lindsey
00:12:00got it
00:12:03what are you doing
00:12:13oh my god
00:12:17oh my god
00:12:33what's going on
00:12:34dude your enemy's nude just got put up on the big screen
00:12:36what's
00:12:36yeah
00:12:37yeah
00:12:38yeah
00:12:40yeah
00:12:41yeah
00:12:45yeah
00:12:45yeah
00:12:46yeah
00:12:49yeah
00:12:50yeah
00:12:50yeah
00:12:51come on
00:12:52let's see if these builds are photoshopped
00:12:55yeah
00:12:57yeah
00:12:57stop delete it please
00:12:58delete it
00:12:59strips
00:12:59strips
00:13:01strips
00:13:01strips
00:13:02strips
00:13:03strips
00:13:03strips
00:13:04strips
00:13:10oh my brave knight
00:13:12i wish you were here with me right now
00:13:18oh my god
00:13:20oh cool
00:13:21more though your enemy's kinda hot
00:13:23since you are so into slutty photos
00:13:26why don't we just go ahead and go full nude
00:13:30No
00:13:31No no no no no
00:13:32Stop
00:13:35Get off me
00:13:37Get off me
00:13:38Get off me
00:13:51My school enemy is my ally girlfriend?
00:13:54Get off me
00:13:56Get off me
00:13:58Stop it
00:13:58Oh my god
00:14:06Hey
00:14:10You okay?
00:14:12Give that to me
00:14:20Now give the phone back Jan
00:14:22What the hell Cole?
00:14:24I thought you'd be happy
00:14:30How does it feel being exposed to the whole school?
00:14:32Not good huh?
00:14:34Now if you don't delete it off your phone
00:14:35I'm exposed to what else is fake about you
00:14:37And I know it's not just your purse
00:14:40Why are you even defending her?
00:14:42She's the loser who has nude photos for random men
00:14:44Here we go
00:14:46Haley's got more personality than all of you combined
00:14:48And if you mess with her, you mess with me
00:14:50You hear me?
00:14:55Haley are you?
00:14:56Cole is on my side now?
00:14:58Is he doing this to play with my feelings?
00:15:00I just need to be alone
00:15:03Haley!
00:15:07Cole is a rich asshole
00:15:09And he said we were enemies
00:15:11But why did I get butterflies when he looked at me today?
00:15:17Don't stay up too late honey
00:15:19Love you mom
00:15:21Wait mom
00:15:23Wait mom
00:15:27Do people change?
00:15:29Like
00:15:31Can a spoiled brat
00:15:33Somehow
00:15:35Become nice?
00:15:36Well maybe just give them a second chance
00:15:56Tough day huh?
00:15:58There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria
00:16:00They're my favorite
00:16:02Noted
00:16:03Is that all?
00:16:04The whole school treats me like I'm their punching bag
00:16:06I'm just trying to bring a little hope to my family
00:16:08And keep my scholarship
00:16:10Oh
00:16:11I'm really proud of you
00:16:14And then there's this guy
00:16:15He has this vendetta against me
00:16:17But at the same time he's super contradictory
00:16:19It's so confusing
00:16:21Sounds like you're into this guy
00:16:23Sounds like you're into this guy
00:16:25No!
00:16:26I'm not into this guy
00:16:27I like you
00:16:27Only you
00:16:34I really liked your photo by the way
00:16:36You did?
00:16:37Are you gonna roast for Kate?
00:16:38I was thinking it would be better if we met in person
00:16:40That sounds amazing
00:16:42When?
00:16:43When?
00:16:44Well after school
00:16:45At the balcony
00:16:46I'll bring flowers
00:16:47Deal?
00:16:56I'm about to meet my boyfriend
00:17:08I'm about to meet my boyfriend
00:17:09Stop thinking about Cole
00:17:18Call me father
00:17:19I heard about you harassing Jen at school today
00:17:22Defending that nobody
00:17:23Haley girl
00:17:24He's not a nobody dad
00:17:26Are those for her?
00:17:32What the fuck?
00:17:35What the fuck?
00:17:37What the fuck?
00:17:37I know what Haley is Cole
00:17:39Her mother works as a maid at my office
00:17:42That whole family is trash
00:17:43Stay away from her
00:17:45And what if I say no?
00:17:46Stay away from Haley Cole
00:17:48Or I'll fire her mother
00:17:51What if she found out that you were the one making her life miserable?
00:17:54I'm almost 18
00:17:55Soon I'll have my inheritance
00:17:57I hate to make Haley wait
00:17:59But she can't know who I am before I make sure her family is safe
00:18:04You're sick
00:18:06It's called watching out for your future
00:18:14Oh hi
00:18:16I'm Haley
00:18:17Yes
00:18:18Mmhmm
00:18:18So nice to meet you
00:18:20God
00:18:21I'd give anything just to hear her say my name
00:18:24But the moment she knows
00:18:25I lose her forever
00:18:29Thank you for the flowers
00:18:30You're so nice
00:18:36Guacamole wizard
00:18:38Fail
00:18:41Guacamole wizard
00:18:42Ew
00:18:45You're waiting for your stupid little secret boyfriend?
00:18:48Pathetic
00:18:49Maybe he's married
00:18:50Or maybe he's fat
00:18:51And maybe he's sitting on his back video
00:18:55I don't want any more trouble
00:18:58Why is guacamole wizard still not here?
00:19:01Oh no, we're not here to give you any trouble
00:19:03We just noticed that you didn't have any lunch
00:19:05And so we thought we would bring you a sandwich
00:19:15Eat it
00:19:22Call me
00:19:23So you thought that you could just humiliate me
00:19:26In front of the entire school?
00:19:28You're a maid's daughter
00:19:30So you can go ahead and eat trash
00:19:32Guacamole wizard
00:19:33Where are you?
00:19:35Oh and by the way
00:19:36Nicole's not gonna come save you
00:19:38Because after all
00:19:39He's rich
00:19:40Like me
00:19:44I'm nothing like you
00:19:53Cole again?
00:19:54Why is he always here when I need help?
00:19:57Pick it up
00:19:58Cole, we were kidding
00:20:00It's ketchup
00:20:01Pick?
00:20:02That bloody thing up
00:20:06Take out of your phone and record this
00:20:16Didn't your dad tell you not to mess with Hayley anymore?
00:20:18Don't think you have leverage here
00:20:19Cause I'll tell your mom how fucked up you are
00:20:22You wanna hold that thing next to your face
00:20:24And do what I say
00:20:28I
00:20:29Will leave Hayley alone
00:20:32I will leave Hayley alone
00:20:38Got it?
00:20:38Yeah
00:20:39Let's go
00:20:41What are you looking at?
00:20:45Got it?
00:20:46Let's go
00:20:55Uh, thank you
00:20:57Wow
00:20:59Never thought I'd hear you say that
00:21:03Why do you keep following me around?
00:21:05I just
00:21:07I happened to see you
00:21:09Were you waiting on someone?
00:21:11Yeah
00:21:12My boyfriend actually
00:21:16Well, he
00:21:17He kind of stood me up, so
00:21:19Maybe you didn't do it on purpose
00:21:23Maybe you gotta do it nice today
00:21:25Cole, are you being nice to me?
00:21:28You thought we were enemies
00:21:31I mean, I still find you incredibly annoying though
00:21:33Why that annoying?
00:21:35Maybe you'll like me once you realize I have layers
00:21:37Are you trying to play with my feelings, Cole Ednaz?
00:21:40Cause it's not gonna work
00:21:41I'm like those stupid, spoiled heiresses
00:21:49How'd that online boyfriend years make you fall for her?
00:21:56He...
00:21:56He makes me feel safe
00:21:59You wouldn't understand though
00:22:01You wouldn't understand though
00:22:05You understand better than you think
00:22:08Cole understands me better than I think
00:22:12I don't see
00:22:13I don't see
00:22:14Why you touch him like this
00:22:25If you keep staring, I'm gonna think you like what you see
00:22:29No, my...
00:22:31My boyfriend has way better abs than you do
00:22:36In the game
00:22:38In the game
00:22:39Oh, in the game, huh?
00:22:46Why does he have to smell so good?
00:22:47Oh, yeah
00:22:52Are you that slow in the game, too?
00:22:55I can see why he likes you
00:23:07I can't do this
00:23:10I love my boyfriend
00:23:11And you will never understand that
00:23:13He's smart and he's kind
00:23:15And he loves me for who I am
00:23:19That is so much more important to me than whatever this is between us
00:23:23I wish I could just tell her right now
00:23:33Wait, it couldn't be
00:23:37Cole, what was that notification on your phone?
00:23:42There's nothing
00:23:43Cole, who are you?
00:23:47What was that notification on your phone?
00:23:49It was my dad telling me my car got done getting waxed
00:23:54Champagne problems, huh?
00:23:57You live such a tough life
00:24:03What was I thinking?
00:24:04We are from two different worlds
00:24:06He just wants to play with me
00:24:08But why did I want to kiss him so badly?
00:24:15Why didn't you come to school today?
00:24:16I got into a car accident
00:24:19Really? Are you okay?
00:24:21You have to keep me in the hospital till prom
00:24:23He was right
00:24:24Who?
00:24:25Nobody
00:24:26Which hospital are you staying at?
00:24:27I want to come visit you
00:24:28No, no, you can't
00:24:30I look miserable now
00:24:31You need to see me in style
00:24:33Fine, if you say so
00:24:36So, are we going to prom together?
00:24:38Hell yeah, we are
00:24:44Why would anyone want to sit next to her?
00:24:47Why would anyone want to sit next to her?
00:24:47Whoever needs a charity case
00:25:04Oh, you
00:25:06No, me
00:25:07Why is she so lucky?
00:25:09Cole's never been this way with any other girl
00:25:12People think you're really lucky to be my lab partner
00:25:15I'm sure you feel really lucky to be my lab partner
00:25:17Because you don't do any homework
00:25:24You finished it?
00:25:26It's okay
00:25:27We'll get to know each other more
00:25:28I'm a bit curious about you actually
00:25:30I'm curious about you though
00:25:32Like uh, how close were you with your mom?
00:25:36What is he trying to do?
00:25:38It's none of your business
00:25:39But I'm very close with my mom
00:25:41I'd kill anyone who hurts her
00:25:46Does Colt genuinely want to know me?
00:25:56So
00:25:57Are you going to prom?
00:25:59I don't know
00:26:00So you have a date
00:26:04Or shall I say victim?
00:26:06Are you jealous of me?
00:26:07Me? Jealous?
00:26:09No, why would I be jealous?
00:26:10Oh because I think you so secretly want me
00:26:13You are so full of yourself
00:26:15You can do this on your own
00:26:17Yeah
00:26:19No way
00:26:21It's a self-locking door
00:26:22Really?
00:26:24Ms. Gorman's gonna be back in an hour
00:26:25I'm sure it'll be fine
00:26:26I'm stuck here with you for a full hour?
00:26:29Okay, sorry, am I that bad?
00:26:31I think maybe we can pick up where we left off
00:26:34Don't worry, maybe trust me to do
00:26:37We're keeping our distance this time actually
00:26:39Yeah
00:26:49That was my first kiss
00:26:53My first kiss was not supposed to go like that
00:26:56It was supposed to be special at prom
00:26:58And not just bumping lips
00:27:10You're really good at this
00:27:12Why don't you regret it?
00:27:14You know
00:27:16We can do more if you want
00:27:32Hey Lay, I have been wanting you back a lot more than Evac
00:27:36So you want me?
00:27:40I think you know how much I want you
00:27:45Do you want me?
00:27:48I want you.
00:27:53Oh, shit.
00:27:57Anyone in here?
00:28:01Oh, my God.
00:28:02How long have you two been in here?
00:28:04I really need to change this lock.
00:28:06Are you two okay?
00:28:07Yeah, we're good.
00:28:09We're okay.
00:28:18You're just going to pretend like that didn't happen?
00:28:20What didn't happen?
00:28:22Hey, wait.
00:28:22It's just hormones.
00:28:24Jake.
00:28:26Can you still play after your accident?
00:28:28Relax, I'm not dead.
00:28:29Wait, car accident?
00:28:31Guacamole wizard?
00:28:38I gotta go.
00:28:46Guacamole wizard.
00:28:48Huh?
00:28:50Are you all better after your car accident?
00:28:53Do I know you?
00:28:54Why is he being so standoffish?
00:28:56Is he trying to give me a surprise?
00:28:58Or he heard something about Cole?
00:29:01You're crushing your soda can.
00:29:04She thinks guacamole wizard is Jake Myers.
00:29:07He was in a real car accident.
00:29:08According to you, so is guacamole wizard.
00:29:11I can't take this anymore.
00:29:13Cole, wait.
00:29:15Oh, shit.
00:29:20What's up, guys?
00:29:22Um, we were just chatting.
00:29:24Chatting about Jake's grand plans to kick balls?
00:29:28Was there something that you wanted, Cole?
00:29:31Hey!
00:29:32I just figured I'd bring you some mozzarella sticks.
00:29:35They're your favorite, right?
00:29:38How did you know that?
00:29:40Tough day, huh?
00:29:41There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria.
00:29:44They're my favorite.
00:29:45He couldn't be Cole.
00:29:47Could he?
00:29:53The truth is, um...
00:29:54A dickhead?
00:29:57What do you honestly get out of here, bro?
00:29:59You came to my table, bro, and knocked my ball away.
00:30:08There it goes again.
00:30:10Cole is jealous.
00:30:11We got a problem here, Cole?
00:30:13We don't have a problem.
00:30:15We don't have a problem.
00:30:17Right?
00:30:17Tell Cole to get my ball, and we don't have a problem.
00:30:21Jake, it would take me forever to find one of your balls.
00:30:25I have the ball now.
00:30:26Can we stop measuring each other's dicks?
00:30:30Cole and Jake are fighting over Haley?
00:30:33Maybe I can use that.
00:30:37Jake!
00:30:38Hey!
00:30:40What if I told you that I have an internship opportunity for you with my dad?
00:30:43Wait, seriously?
00:30:44Yeah.
00:30:45Just one little catch.
00:30:46You have to pretend to like Hallie Roth.
00:30:51All right, you have the rest of the period to work on your lab reports.
00:30:54If you have any questions, I'll be at my desk.
00:30:57I thought Guacamole Wizard would feel more like Cole.
00:31:01But if he's really Jake, then maybe this was always going to end.
00:31:05You've literally been staring for five minutes.
00:31:07I'm thinking.
00:31:08About the report or about him?
00:31:10Why are you making it so weird about Jake?
00:31:12We literally made out of a sore dream.
00:31:15Maybe I've known Jake longer.
00:31:16No, you don't.
00:31:18How do you know that?
00:31:18You're going to prom with someone else.
00:31:20Stop acting like you're serious about me.
00:31:22You have no idea.
00:31:28Oh my god, is Jake asking me to prom?
00:31:32Oh my god, is Jake asking me to prom?
00:31:58Are you asking me to prom?
00:32:01Too cheesy?
00:32:02No, it's cute.
00:32:04The accident?
00:32:06The mozzarella sticks?
00:32:07He is Guacamole Wizard.
00:32:09So, um, what do you think?
00:32:12You want to go to prom with me?
00:32:14I...
00:32:14I should feel happy.
00:32:16But why does this feel so wrong?
00:32:20Hey, can we not?
00:32:24Hey, can we not?
00:32:27Dude, seriously, what is your problem?
00:32:28My problem here, dude, is that me and my lab partner have work to do.
00:32:31And you're out here to strike me with bad puns.
00:32:34Wow.
00:32:35That is some weak shit, man.
00:32:37Oh, that's weak shit?
00:32:39Is this weak shit?
00:32:43Oh my god.
00:32:51Wow.
00:32:52He's got really pretty eyes.
00:32:59Wait, I can't.
00:33:01Colt, put me down.
00:33:02Put me down.
00:33:03Put me down.
00:33:05Don't do that again.
00:33:19New couple alert.
00:33:21Fuck off, Jen.
00:33:22Why do you hate me so much, Cole?
00:33:24You and I, we're not that different.
00:33:26And if you'd realize and give me a chance, I think that we would make a great match.
00:33:31Like, say, if you asked me to prom.
00:33:34I might say yes.
00:33:37Jen, you want to go to prom with me?
00:33:41Jen, you want to go to prom with me?
00:33:44We're both hot, and we're both rich, and our dads have been in business, like, forever, so.
00:33:50How romantic.
00:33:51I think I'll pass.
00:33:54You're going to regret this, Cole Edmonds.
00:34:01If I message Corcomole Wizard, I wonder if Jake's phone will ding.
00:34:07What should we wear to prom?
00:34:19I'll talk to you later.
00:34:20I'll see you around school, okay?
00:34:21Okay, yeah, I'll see you later.
00:34:22Bye.
00:34:24He's so different.
00:34:25Maybe he's still recovering from the accident?
00:34:30Hayley?
00:34:37What are you doing?
00:34:39Jeez.
00:34:41God.
00:34:46Here, I'll get it.
00:34:48Yeah, I know.
00:34:52Oh.
00:34:53You're scared of me seeing all the girls in your phone?
00:34:56I don't care.
00:34:57I do care.
00:35:00Hayley, I...
00:35:17Don't put a prom with Jake.
00:35:19I mean, he only knows you like mozzarella sticks because of me.
00:35:21He doesn't even know you.
00:35:23And you do?
00:35:24How do you know I like mozzarella sticks?
00:35:26That's something I've only ever talked about.
00:35:27Because I pay attention to what you like.
00:35:32I noticed it at lunch.
00:35:34The first day.
00:35:36You were watching me?
00:35:38Just don't go to prom and shake.
00:35:54Move.
00:35:56Cole is talking to Hayley.
00:35:58Again.
00:35:58Your job is to keep them away from each other, Jake.
00:36:02Unless you don't want that internship that my dad got you.
00:36:04Obviously I do.
00:36:05Okay, then break them up, idiot.
00:36:08Um, what do I do?
00:36:11I've got a few ideas.
00:36:17Hayley, look.
00:36:19Someone will take you to prom.
00:36:21I promise.
00:36:22Yeah?
00:36:23Really, like who?
00:36:24I mean, the whole school hates me, except for Jake.
00:36:27And you, but you're not asking me.
00:36:31Hey.
00:36:33Oh, hey, Jake.
00:36:35Hey, Hal.
00:36:35Um, I just wanted to thank you again for the other night.
00:36:40The other night?
00:36:42Yeah, it was so sexy.
00:36:47You're so sexy.
00:36:49Jake, what are you talking about?
00:36:50Oh, I hate to break it to you, asshole, but she's my prom date.
00:37:00And she's a real tiger in the bedroom.
00:37:04Oh, shit.
00:37:06Oh, shit.
00:37:08Oh, shit.
00:37:09Oh, shit.
00:37:09Oh, shit.
00:37:10Oh, shit.
00:37:13Oh, shit.
00:37:17Oh, shit.
00:37:19Oh, my God.
00:37:23Stop, guys.
00:37:24Stop it.
00:37:25Stop.
00:37:26Stop.
00:37:27What the hell is going on over there?
00:37:31Shit.
00:37:32It's Principal Stevens.
00:37:33I've got to save Cole.
00:37:34I mean, Jake.
00:37:35I've got to save Jake.
00:37:42Oh, my God.
00:37:43Principal Stevens.
00:37:44I'm so sorry.
00:37:46Hayley Rock.
00:37:47That's the tension.
00:37:49After school, don't be late.
00:38:06Cole, what are you doing here?
00:38:09Can we keep you company?
00:38:11It's the least I could do after you saved my ass today.
00:38:15The locker thing.
00:38:16That was an accident.
00:38:18Oh, sure.
00:38:21So, uh, you and Jake, huh?
00:38:25No.
00:38:27He lied about that.
00:38:28I don't know why, though.
00:38:30Good.
00:38:31You know, father that asshole, every time he looks at you, makes me sick to my stomach.
00:38:37Thinking about him touching you, kissing you, I could kill him.
00:38:44Promise me you won't go to prom with it.
00:38:49Okay, fine.
00:38:50I won't.
00:38:53Because I want to go to prom with you.
00:38:58Okay, everyone, let's start off by mixing our sodium bicarbonate.
00:39:08Oh, my God.
00:39:09I am so fed up with this.
00:39:23Oops.
00:39:29Sorry.
00:39:30I tripped.
00:39:31No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:39:33Jet.
00:39:34What?
00:39:34It always has to be about her, doesn't it?
00:39:40They're dead.
00:39:41They're both dead.
00:39:42Oh.
00:39:44How am I going to be able to talk to guacamole wizard?
00:39:49Oh.
00:39:50What are you?
00:39:51Are you almost crying?
00:39:53It's probably because you can't afford a new one.
00:39:57Jen, what's going on over there?
00:40:08Crazy.
00:40:09What's going on is Jen is getting a taste of her own medicine.
00:40:13Mrs. Gorman, it's burning.
00:40:14Mr. Edmonds.
00:40:15Oh, please.
00:40:16It's baking soda and water.
00:40:17You're fine.
00:40:18Detention.
00:40:19Today, after school.
00:40:21Shit.
00:40:33Jake, hey.
00:40:34Oh, uh, sorry.
00:40:36Got to get to student council.
00:40:40Hey, you didn't even try the rice trick.
00:40:43The rice trick?
00:40:46Yeah.
00:40:48You don't know about the...
00:40:51Come on.
00:41:04Hey.
00:41:05Um, Ella.
00:41:07It's Emma.
00:41:09Yeah, that's what I said.
00:41:10Can you hack a broken laptop?
00:41:14Okay.
00:41:20Hey, it's going to be okay.
00:41:23We'll pour out in a few more minutes and it'll be like the whole thing never happened.
00:41:27No, it's not just the phone or the laptop.
00:41:29It means...
00:41:30It means I can't...
00:41:32Can't what?
00:41:35I talked to a friend online.
00:41:38He's really important to me.
00:41:43And I'm sure you're really important to him.
00:41:56You know, Cole, if you look past all that hair gel and big ol' ego and rich kid bravo...
00:42:03Okay, okay.
00:42:04I get it.
00:42:08You're kind of sweet.
00:42:14Hey, look at that.
00:42:16Oh, my God.
00:42:19Oh, my God.
00:42:21You're a miracle worker.
00:42:28Oh, what is taking so long?
00:42:30You doused this thing in sodium bicarbonate.
00:42:32Shut up, Ella.
00:42:33It's Emma.
00:42:35Whatever.
00:42:42Oh, my God.
00:42:43Oh, my God.
00:42:45Oh, morning, Valley Whore.
00:42:52How are things in the castle?
00:42:59Valley Whore?
00:43:00What are they talking about?
00:43:16Guacamole Wizard, when can we be together in person?
00:43:20Guacamole Wizard, I want you so badly, I dream about you touching me.
00:43:24Oh, my God.
00:43:25Someone hacked my Castle Claimers messages.
00:43:27Touch me, Guacamole Wizard.
00:43:30Yeah, Valley Whore.
00:43:32Show them what you really like.
00:43:51Here you go.
00:43:53Here.
00:43:53this is for you oh do you like what i've done with the place you hacked my laptop oh no
00:44:04it
00:44:04wasn't me it was that kid ella but i definitely got to reap the benefits what kind of incel sex
00:44:10over a video game hayley what are you catfishing this guy no i'm not trying to catfish him hey
00:44:15everyone i think valley whore is a catfish because who in their right mind would spend their time
00:44:38thirsting over you
00:44:48stop it stop stop
00:44:52i thought i'd send the janitor some time
00:44:58jenny hey now's the time tell them tell them what that's your guacamole wizard
00:45:08who's guacamole wizard here you go
00:45:14oh my god did you think that jake was your secret little online boyfriend
00:45:18oh sweetie i've been bribing him this whole time to pretend to like you what why would you do that
00:45:24oh i don't know cole why do you think i would do that jake is this true have you been
00:45:31pretending to
00:45:32like me this whole time sorry it was nothing personal
00:45:42yeah nothing personal huh oh oh oh all right all right all right enough what in the world is going
00:45:54on here is that a leaf blower
00:45:57that's all him okay well you both have detention so
00:46:05let me get this straight you stole a leaf blower and defaced school property it wasn't school property
00:46:11dad it was jen's cyber boy spreadsheets jesus christ how did she always get away with this
00:46:17shit could it be because her father's running for senate cole you think that's what it could be
00:46:21who cares who cares i care and i hear she's got an eye for you so you're taking her to
00:46:28prom what
00:46:29how overmind that body oh because you like that hayley girl i'm firing her mother right now no no please
00:46:36don't please then you're taking jen to prom max's dad called he said he's having a party tomorrow
00:46:43you're gonna go and you're gonna ask jen to prom end of discussion
00:46:53come on you big coward message him just do it
00:47:00you must think i'm the biggest idiot
00:47:09i could never think that
00:47:16but i thought you were jake please can't you just tell me now i think i've had enough public
00:47:21humiliation for one lifetime
00:47:26i heard that guy max is throwing a party tomorrow if you want i'll meet you there
00:47:42okay you got the ceiling just take a deep breath you got this you got this
00:47:50okay you look beautiful
00:47:55thank you mom
00:48:01i don't know
00:48:15hey hayley i'm glad you came you look so pretty
00:48:18hi hi hey max your house is gorgeous i mean no it's just my parents blood money you know they're
00:48:25upstairs watching the last of us right now they don't care about shit get drunk girl
00:48:28whoo
00:48:42what are you doing here valley whore
00:48:47looks like the catfish came out of the pond hey everyone let's give it up for valley whore
00:48:52valley whore
00:48:57jen why are you doing this what have i even done to you to me oh i'm actually concerned about
00:49:02our whole
00:49:02community because those little cringy messages on your castle game those are concerning actually kind
00:49:09i feel a bit of a perv did you know that hayley she's a little pervy princess pervy princess
00:49:23hey let's get perfect tonight leave me alone is there a fire okay we set off the alarm
00:49:39so
00:49:43so
00:49:51so
00:49:55so
00:50:21are you him would you stop trying to find your stupid little cyber boyfriend okay cole is not
00:50:29him anyways we are going to the prom together no i'm not yes you are it's okay you can be
00:50:36honest
00:50:36about your feelings so you too this whole time oh my god i am such an idiot hey wait wait
00:50:53please at least take my jackets you know if you really wanted to humiliate me you didn't have to
00:50:58go to the extra effort jen was doing just fine i wasn't trying to humiliate you then what were
00:51:02you trying to do i guess you obviously the white clothes were just an added bonus i knew i shouldn't
00:51:08trusted you now what about guacamole wizard what are you
00:51:22who is that just the devil get in the car
00:51:30i'm not going to ask you again cole get in the car
00:51:34dad can you just act normal for once and please introduce yourself to hayley
00:51:37i already assumed that's who this was i'm a servant so you're the scholarship trash that's
00:51:45hell-bent on ruining cole's life well i've got news for you young lady my son is going to marry
00:51:51a good
00:51:52girl from a respectable family and that's not you you will be forgotten you're a maid's daughter
00:51:59and your mom works for me stay away from him or i swear to god your mother is fire dad
00:52:07stop
00:52:08don't you touch my family i'll stay away
00:52:12hey come on you don't mean that
00:52:16i hate everything you stand for i hate your greed and your callousness and your elitist ideas of what
00:52:24you think a good person looks like i hate everything about you i hate all of it i don't
00:52:30want any part of it so cole go with your dad
00:52:36hayley
00:52:45no laptop and no phone for a week ever since mom died you've turned into this cold patriarch
00:52:51hayley not that's real love why do you have to make me so miserable i promised your mother i
00:52:55would make you a success son even if it meant saving you from yourself
00:53:07hi hayley i'm emma i know you are
00:53:11right i just felt kind of bad that i accidentally helped and ruin your life so
00:53:17i wanted to return your laptop to you goodness new
00:53:24oh wow thanks emma okay bye
00:53:33one down one to go
00:53:35you're so cool i know emma
00:53:38wanna go to prom why not
00:53:42let's get these lovers together
00:53:49hi mr edmund
00:53:50hi max and max's friend sorry we weren't expecting you cole's grounded
00:53:56oh he is but it was his 18th birthday today
00:54:00what can i say max actions have consequences birthday or no cole is grounded
00:54:07well that really sucks because he's uh also the president of the prom committee
00:54:13we were supposed to review budgets today
00:54:16cole my son cole reviewing budgets
00:54:19he's never reviewed a budget a day in his life
00:54:22well mr edmunds today could be that day
00:54:24and we just have to give him back this school sanctioned laptop
00:54:26so we can get back to his very important
00:54:28and very respectable budgetary work
00:54:40go away
00:54:44max what
00:54:46what are you guys doing here
00:54:47happy birthday cole
00:54:49i brought you my laptop and logged into your castle claimers account
00:54:51just get it back to me by tomorrow
00:54:53what what's going on
00:54:55dude it's your 18th birthday
00:54:57you can tell hayley who you are now
00:54:59you can be together
00:55:00just log into this stupid game
00:55:02and tell the girl who you love
00:55:03who you really are
00:55:05no
00:55:06i'll tell her myself
00:55:07stick me in your car
00:55:15come on the wizard
00:55:19mom i'm fine
00:55:20i just need some time alone
00:55:30open the door
00:55:32wait what
00:55:34he's here
00:55:42it's you
00:55:44i should have given you this to you a long time ago
00:55:48hey we have wanted to tell you who i was from the very beginning
00:55:51my dad threatened to follow your mom
00:55:53and i had to wait a really long time
00:55:55to tell you who i was
00:55:56i got my inheritance
00:55:58and i can protect you and your family
00:55:59so you don't have to choose
00:56:14i understand that this changes things
00:56:17if you don't love me the way you love guacamole wizard but
00:56:23look i need you to know i love you
00:56:37cool i love you
00:56:39you do
00:56:41yes you idiot
00:56:42i've loved you for months
00:56:44i mean
00:56:45this whole guacamole wizard thing was so confusing though
00:56:48because i had to be loyal to him and
00:56:51but you're him
00:56:52you didn't expect her
00:56:55i
00:56:55i mean
00:56:56i
00:56:57i always hoped it was you
00:57:00until you hoped
00:57:02yes
00:57:03i hoped it was you
00:57:04you were always there for me
00:57:08you're hot now
00:57:10you're really fucking hot
00:57:16hey uh
00:57:17there are those things that we could do
00:57:20you never go
00:57:22yeah
00:57:25take my clothes off
00:57:26yeah no don't worry
00:57:50okay so
00:57:52what do you think
00:57:5310 out of 10
00:57:54yeah
00:57:55yeah
00:57:55we'll do it again
00:57:57i'll get sex for sex with me specifically
00:57:59i've only ever had sex with you specifically
00:58:02all right
00:58:03all right that's fair
00:58:04i'll uh
00:58:05i'll take that as a warning
00:58:11what is my life now
00:58:13am i being nice to cole eggnance
00:58:16oh god no
00:58:17i fully expect you to
00:58:19continue to berate me endlessly
00:58:21now i'll just
00:58:22i'll just lust behind it
00:58:25there's always been lust behind it
00:58:26i'll ask you a minute
00:58:27stop it
00:58:31um
00:58:32same
00:58:34isn't promenade
00:58:36i think you know if it's promenade
00:58:38okay
00:58:40but
00:58:40the real question is
00:58:42do you got a date
00:58:45cole are you asking me to prom
00:58:47i would have asked you earlier
00:58:49i would have asked you earlier
00:58:49but jay kind of gave me to a joke
00:58:51oh god please don't mention his name again
00:58:52i don't want to hear it
00:58:54yeah you don't have to ask me once
00:58:56but i don't even have a dress
00:58:59later
00:59:03i just slept with cole edmonds
00:59:06and i'm in love with cole edmonds
00:59:07who would have guessed
00:59:12i thought
00:59:14only the best for my princess
00:59:16where did you get that
00:59:19i might have gotten you a dress
00:59:21on the off chance that you
00:59:24might have wanted to go to prom with me
00:59:25and maybe had nothing to wear
00:59:29of course i'll go to prom with you
00:59:35mr edmonds
00:59:36i didn't expect you to be here
00:59:38cole
00:59:39are you here
00:59:41cole
00:59:42are you here
00:59:44mr
00:59:45you can't just barge into my house like this
00:59:48i see you cole
00:59:48you are in big trouble
01:00:06hey uh
01:00:08you almost done in there
01:00:09you try changing into an evening gown
01:00:11in a bunch of thorny bushes
01:00:14okay i'm ready
01:00:27what do you think
01:00:31my god haley you are the most beautiful thing i have ever seen
01:00:38i just hunched over in a car mirror to do this lipstick
01:00:41you're not messing it up for at least 20 minutes
01:00:4420 more minutes
01:00:45we're in
01:00:46i do
01:00:50thank you all for using the prom voting site to catch your votes
01:00:54i hear we have a winner
01:00:58and your 2026 prom queen is jen longfellow
01:01:04oh my god thank you guys so much seriously this makes the world to me i mean like who else
01:01:15would
01:01:15win right
01:01:15oh this is just the perfect moment
01:01:23oh my god that's hailey and cole
01:01:25it was fun
01:01:28this is just what you did
01:01:29oh my god
01:01:33where do you go
01:01:33here uh
01:01:34most time that's up
01:01:36no
01:01:36but who cares
01:01:40hell yeah
01:01:44Ew, literally, what the fuck?
01:01:46Damn.
01:01:47Language.
01:01:48I am the queen, okay?
01:01:49She's just a little pervy princess.
01:01:51Come on, everyone say it with me.
01:01:54Pervy princess, pervy princess, pervy princess.
01:02:01Wait.
01:02:03Wait, wait, wait, what are those?
01:02:05Those are texts between me and my dad.
01:02:07Make Cole Edmonds fall in love with you.
01:02:10His dad's month is essential to funding my campaign.
01:02:14Don't worry, Daddy.
01:02:15If I can't have it, no one can.
01:02:19I'm going to destroy Hayley Roth's life.
01:02:21Is this real?
01:02:23Jen's crazy.
01:02:26Who did this?
01:02:27Who did this?
01:02:31What?
01:02:31You exploited me for a hacking job and didn't think I was going to hack your phone?
01:02:35You little skit.
01:02:37You know, Jen, as the principal,
01:02:40I'm supposed to remain impartial and above all of this petty drama.
01:02:46But quite frankly, you are the worst.
01:02:50And I think it's time that you are expelled from Edmonds Academy.
01:02:54You can't do that.
01:02:56I'm the principal.
01:02:57So, uh, yes, I can.
01:03:07There was no internship.
01:03:10You lied to me.
01:03:18Hailey, catch.
01:03:24My princess finally has a crown.
01:03:27Now all I need is my handsome prince.
01:03:29Oh, yeah, no can do.
01:03:32All I have to offer is a Bowie knight with a chip on his shoulder
01:03:36and an awesome sense of humor.
01:03:38Oof, how can I refuse?
01:03:46Oh, no, that's my dad.
01:03:50We are going home right now.
01:03:53You disobeyed me for the last time, boy.
01:03:55Yeah, I'm not a boy, Dad.
01:03:58You talk all the time about wanting a man that's worthy of the family last name,
01:04:02yet you can't see I've already become that man.
01:04:06And it's because of Hailey.
01:04:08If you can accept that, I'll make my own path.
01:04:11And best believe me, I can.
01:04:13I'll say this.
01:04:15It's the most backbone I've ever seen in you, Cole.
01:04:20Joy Prime.
01:04:28I am so proud of you.
01:04:31I kind of done with all you being by my side.
01:04:35That was terrifying.
01:04:36It's not like we haven't slayed a dragon before, though, so...
01:04:41I love you, Bella Quinn.
01:04:42I love you, guacamole wizard.
01:04:45Oh, my God, I gotta change that username.
01:04:46Yeah, you too.
01:04:47Yeah.
01:04:48Yeah.
01:04:49You do.
01:04:49I love you too.
01:04:51Yeah.
01:04:52Yeah.
01:04:53That'd be great.
01:04:53All right.
01:04:54Yeah.
01:04:55Yeah.
01:05:01Yeah.
Comments