- 1 day ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:02New intimacy level unlocked.
00:00:09New skin dangerously hot is equipped.
00:00:18You're staring. You like what you see?
00:00:21Maybe.
00:00:30When are you gonna tell me I hate who you are?
00:00:32You know who I really am. I'm ValleyQueen33.
00:00:35Such a dumb username.
00:00:37Oh, okay, guacamole wizard275.
00:00:39Don't talk to me about dumb usernames.
00:00:42You know, you're lucky you're cute.
00:00:43You don't even know what I look like.
00:00:45Well, I would if you agreed to meet me in person.
00:00:47Or at least a photo.
00:00:50Maybe someday.
00:00:55Crap, I'm late.
00:00:57Good luck, Skylifter Queen.
00:01:01Who needs luck when I have my talisman to remind me of my knight?
00:01:09In the game of castle claimers,
00:01:11I might be a warrior princess in love with a dashing knight.
00:01:14But on my first day at Edmunds Academy,
00:01:16I feel like a peasant.
00:01:19Watch it!
00:01:20This isn't public school.
00:01:23Forget your training wheels.
00:01:26At least I have my knight's charm to help me get through the day.
00:01:40Stop, stop, stop, stop the car!
00:01:44No!
00:01:46God, my knight's special talisman!
00:01:49It's ruined!
00:01:56He's so hot.
00:01:57Hey!
00:01:57I told you to stop the car!
00:02:04Oh my gosh, it's cool!
00:02:05He's so hot!
00:02:10Hey!
00:02:12What is wrong with you?
00:02:13Didn't you see me yelling and screaming for you to stop the car?
00:02:16Okay, I see you now, new girl.
00:02:18What are you with me, son?
00:02:20What are you talking about?
00:02:22Why?
00:02:24I thought you were one of my fans.
00:02:26No, I'm not one of your fans!
00:02:30You just broke something that's really important to me!
00:02:32Yeah, I broke a lot of hearts, player cop.
00:02:34Okay?
00:02:37You should know that.
00:02:38I don't know who you are, but you were a...
00:02:41You were a...
00:02:42Eh...
00:02:45Asshole!
00:02:50All right.
00:02:51I broke something of yours.
00:02:54Sure, but...
00:02:55Hey!
00:02:56You got my attention.
00:02:59So, in that case, we're even...
00:03:07Don't do it, Hayley.
00:03:10Have a good day.
00:03:13Don't do it!
00:03:14Don't do it!
00:03:15I got a hot mess energy
00:03:21Oh fuck
00:03:23Now we're even
00:03:24My laptop better not be broken
00:03:26I can't lose my connection to Valley Queen
00:03:33You just made the wrong enemy
00:03:37You just made the wrong enemy
00:03:39I'm going to make every classroom
00:03:43Every hallway and every rumor
00:03:45In this school you're a personal nightmare
00:03:48I'm going to make your life a living out
00:03:51What's going on?
00:03:52Cole's fighting the new girl
00:03:53Now Cole's leaving the new girl
00:03:55Yeah, idiot
00:03:56I can see that
00:03:59Just met an unhinged person
00:04:01Good thing the universe balances it with you
00:04:04Same
00:04:05Ran into a certified asshole
00:04:07Can't wait to see you in the game tonight
00:04:11Cole, do you want to know?
00:04:12Do you need help?
00:04:13I can help you
00:04:16The new girl poured coffee on him
00:04:18This bitch thinks that she can just roll up and piss off Michael
00:04:21But he's not your Cole
00:04:22Shut up, Lindsey
00:04:24He's not yet
00:04:26Come on
00:04:28Hi
00:04:29I'm Jen
00:04:30And this is Lindsey
00:04:32Hi
00:04:34I'm Haley
00:04:34So nice to meet you
00:04:36You have first day jitters
00:04:37It's totally understandable
00:04:38We want to make sure you feel really welcome
00:04:40And so we'll take you to your locker
00:04:42Come on
00:04:43Okay
00:04:44Let's go
00:04:49There you go
00:04:50Thanks so much
00:05:12Aw, you're welcome new girl
00:05:14Honestly, it's kind of an improvement on your face
00:05:22Guacamole wizard
00:05:23Wow
00:05:24What are you, catfishing some little lonely online gamer boy?
00:05:28Give it back
00:05:29Hold on
00:05:31Hey, if you go to Edmunds Academy
00:05:33You should come to locker 83 right now
00:05:36Send
00:05:36Here
00:05:37Now your little gamer friend can see your ugly little face
00:05:42So when can I meet the hero who ruined your billionaire shirt?
00:05:45I'm your friend first Max, at least check on me
00:05:48Oh, is it the online love-up?
00:05:50Ah, chill, please
00:05:54No way
00:05:55What is it?
00:05:57Oh, the Hell Queen goes to the school
00:06:04Please ignore that
00:06:05Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank
00:06:08Send
00:06:12What is wrong with you?
00:06:14You messed with Cole Edmunds, and you're gonna mess with me
00:06:17Edmunds?
00:06:18What?
00:06:19You don't know that his family owns the whole school?
00:06:21Wow
00:06:22You really did crawl out of the gutter, didn't you?
00:06:26Stop recording me!
00:06:29Jen is a new girl
00:06:31Wait
00:06:32Is the new girl...
00:06:33Valley Queen?
00:06:36There's no way the new girl is Valley Queen
00:06:38Could it be...
00:06:39Jen?
00:06:42Ew
00:06:46Your enemy is our enemy Cole
00:06:48And I just made sure that the new girl knows that
00:06:51No chance it's Jen
00:06:53So is it...
00:06:54She does look kinda cute
00:07:03Please ignore that
00:07:04Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank
00:07:07What was I thinking?
00:07:09Of course she's not my online lover
00:07:14Hey there buttercup
00:07:15Keep walking Haley
00:07:17Just keep walking
00:07:18You got a problem with shaving this morning?
00:07:21Or...
00:07:22My name's Haley
00:07:23Wow
00:07:24Haley
00:07:25I think you uh...
00:07:27You missed the spell on your upper lip right there
00:07:31What a coincidence
00:07:33So did you!
00:07:34Oh no!
00:07:35Oh no!
00:07:37Oh, I'm sorry
00:07:39I forgot you don't even need shaving cream
00:07:41You're just a man child with follicle issues
00:07:47Whoever ends up with her must have failed an eye exam
00:08:02I was so relieved to see you
00:08:04Something happened today
00:08:05I lost the game
00:08:06I thought I'd never see you again
00:08:08I think it's time we call this what it is
00:08:12And what is this?
00:08:13What I think it is
00:08:15Is...
00:08:15I wanna be with you
00:08:17And you wanna be with me
00:08:19As more than just friends
00:08:21Oh thank god
00:08:23I honestly want that more than anything
00:08:25You're my soul mate
00:08:27Like I like you so much
00:08:28Okay well since we're dating now
00:08:31Um...
00:08:32I'm ready to send my photo
00:08:34Wait, really?
00:08:36Yeah
00:08:36Get ready
00:08:43Okay
00:08:44No face
00:08:45Just the boobs
00:08:48Is it a bad idea?
00:08:49But all my online friends said it's cool
00:08:52PG-13 nudes are harmless
00:08:53All the kids do this
00:08:55You'll love it
00:09:00This lighting hates me
00:09:02Come on Hayley
00:09:04Confidence
00:09:04You literally fight dragons online
00:09:11Okay
00:09:12Okay
00:09:12Yeah
00:09:13That's actually kind of...
00:09:14Oh my god
00:09:19Seriously?
00:09:21Hello?
00:09:22Anyone?
00:09:24Don't look at me!
00:09:28Don't look at me!
00:09:29We're trying not for viable are we?
00:09:31I don't think you're supposed to do it like that
00:09:33Get out!
00:09:34Now!
00:09:35Fine
00:09:36Ow!
00:09:37Damn it!
00:09:42Come on
00:09:58You better...
00:09:58I know I need that
00:09:58No!
00:09:59No!
00:10:03I know!
00:10:03No!
00:10:15You're helping me
00:10:16I won't, I didn't point on it, but here we are
00:10:26Excuse you, these boobs are for someone else
00:10:28I don't know a boyfriend, do we?
00:10:30That is shocking
00:10:31Yeah, actually
00:10:32And he'd probably kill you right now
00:10:34If he saw you were flirting with me
00:10:35Flirting?
00:10:36Yeah, don't lie to yourself
00:10:37I've got a girlfriend too
00:10:38My thoughts and prayers to her
00:10:39Funny
00:10:41Okay, well
00:10:42Can we just pretend this didn't happen
00:10:44And go our separate ways?
00:10:46Fine by me
00:10:49Oh, I know
00:10:51With all the purple bra, by the way
00:10:53I like it in a weird way
00:10:55Not in my type, but
00:10:57You know, power theory
00:10:58Would you just get out of here?
00:11:09Hopefully guacamole wizard will like it too
00:11:12Jen, red alert
00:11:14Colm and the new girl are for sure flirting
00:11:17I think it's time to take drastic action
00:11:21Don't be a coward
00:11:22Just send it
00:11:23Jen
00:11:28Oh my god
00:11:30Here goes nothing
00:11:38Still no response?
00:11:40Don't freak out
00:11:40He's probably just busy
00:11:46Give it back
00:11:46Why?
00:11:47You don't want me to see your slutty little nude?
00:11:50Oh, this is actually a really good photo
00:11:52Honestly, it's so good
00:11:53That I think the whole school should see it
00:11:55Did you get it, Lindsay?
00:11:57Got it
00:12:00What are you doing?
00:12:03What are you doing?
00:12:11Oh my god
00:12:13Oh my god
00:12:16Oh my god
00:12:18Oh my god
00:12:31Dude, your enemy's nude just got put up on the big screen
00:12:34What?
00:12:34Yeah
00:12:49Come on
00:12:50Let's see if these boobs are photoshopped
00:12:54Stop, delete it, please
00:12:56Delete it
00:13:08Oh my brave knight
00:13:09I wish you were here with me right now
00:13:16Oh my god
00:13:17Oh cool
00:13:18Your enemy's kind of hot
00:13:21Since you're so into slutty photos
00:13:23Why don't we just go ahead and go full nude?
00:13:28Jen, no
00:13:29No, no, no, no, no
00:13:30Jen, stop
00:13:31Stop
00:13:32Stop
00:13:33Stop
00:13:33Stop
00:13:34Stop
00:13:34Stop
00:13:35Stop
00:13:35Stop
00:13:35Stop
00:13:36Stop
00:13:36Stop
00:13:36Stop
00:13:50Stop
00:13:54Stop
00:13:55Stop
00:13:56Stop
00:13:57Stop
00:13:58Stop
00:13:58Stop
00:13:58Stop
00:13:58Stop
00:13:58Stop
00:13:59Stop
00:13:59Stop
00:13:59Stop
00:13:59Stop
00:13:59Stop
00:14:00Stop
00:14:00Stop
00:14:01Stop
00:14:03Stop
00:14:06Hey. You okay? Give that to me.
00:14:18Now give the phone back, Jen.
00:14:20What the hell, Cole? I thought you'd be happy.
00:14:28How does it feel being exposed to the whole school? Not good, huh?
00:14:31Now if you don't delete it off your phone, I'm exposed to what else is fake about you.
00:14:35And I know it's not just your purse.
00:14:38Why are you even defending her? She's the loser who has nude photos for random men!
00:14:42Yeah.
00:14:44Haley's got more personality than all of you combined.
00:14:46And if you mess with her, you mess with me. You hear me?
00:14:53Haley, are you?
00:14:54Cole is on my side now? Is he doing this to play with my feelings?
00:14:58I just need to be alone.
00:15:00Haley!
00:15:05Cole is a rich asshole. And he said we were enemies.
00:15:09But why did I get butterflies when he looked at me today?
00:15:14Don't stay up too late, honey.
00:15:17Love you, Mom.
00:15:19Wait, Mom.
00:15:24Do, do people change?
00:15:28Like, can a spoiled brat somehow become nice?
00:15:34Well, maybe just give them a second chance.
00:15:54What's up there, huh?
00:15:55There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria.
00:15:58They're my favorite.
00:16:00Noted. Is that all?
00:16:01The whole school treats me like I'm their punching bag.
00:16:04I'm just trying to bring a little hope to my family and keep my scholarship.
00:16:08Well, I'm really proud of you.
00:16:11And then there's this guy. He has this vendetta against me, but at the same time he's super contradictory.
00:16:17It's so confusing.
00:16:18Sounds like you're into this guy.
00:16:21Sounds like you're into this guy.
00:16:23No, I'm not into this guy. I like you. Only you.
00:16:31I really liked your photo, by the way.
00:16:34You did? Are you going to reciprocate?
00:16:36I was thinking it would be better if we met in person.
00:16:38That sounds amazing. When? Where?
00:16:41After school. At the balcony. I'll bring flowers.
00:16:45Deal.
00:16:54I'm about to meet my boyfriend.
00:17:06Stop thinking about Cole.
00:17:15Army father.
00:17:16I heard about you harassing Jen at school today.
00:17:19Defending that nobody. Haley girl.
00:17:22He's not a nobody, dad.
00:17:24Are those for her?
00:17:29What the fuck?
00:17:33What the fuck?
00:17:34I know what Haley is, Cole.
00:17:36Her mother works as a maid at my office.
00:17:39That whole family is trash.
00:17:41Stay away from her.
00:17:42And what if I say no?
00:17:44Stay away from Haley Cole.
00:17:46Or I'll fire her mother.
00:17:48What if she found out that you were the one making her life miserable?
00:17:52I'm almost 18. Soon I'll have my inheritance.
00:17:55I hate to make Haley wait, but she can't know who I am before I make sure her family is
00:18:00safe.
00:18:01You're sick.
00:18:04It's called watching out for your future.
00:18:11Oh, hi.
00:18:13I'm Haley.
00:18:15Yes.
00:18:16So nice to meet you.
00:18:18God.
00:18:19I'd give anything just to hear her say my name.
00:18:21But the moment she knows, I lose her forever.
00:18:26Thank you for the flowers.
00:18:28You're so nice.
00:18:33Guacamole wizard.
00:18:35Ew.
00:18:39Guacamole wizard.
00:18:40Ew.
00:18:42You're waiting for your stupid little secret boyfriend?
00:18:45Pathetic.
00:18:46Maybe he's married.
00:18:47Or maybe he's fat.
00:18:49And maybe he's sitting on his life video.
00:18:53I don't want any more trouble.
00:18:56Why is guacamole wizard still not here?
00:18:58Oh no, we're not here to give you any trouble.
00:19:00We just noticed that you didn't have any lunch.
00:19:02And so we thought we would bring you a sandwich.
00:19:06Eat it.
00:19:20Call me.
00:19:21So you thought that you could just humiliate me?
00:19:23In front of the entire school?
00:19:26You're a maid's daughter.
00:19:27So you can go ahead and eat trash.
00:19:30Guacamole wizard, where are you?
00:19:32Oh and by the way, Nicole's not gonna come save you.
00:19:35Because after all, he's rich.
00:19:37Like me.
00:19:42I'm nothing like you.
00:19:47Yeah, I'm nothing like you.
00:19:50Cole again?
00:19:51Why is he always here when I need help?
00:19:54Pick it up.
00:19:56Cole, we were kidding.
00:19:57It's ketchup.
00:19:58Pick that bloody thing up.
00:20:04Take it, you're gonna record this.
00:20:13Didn't your dad tell you not to mess with Hailey anymore?
00:20:15I don't think you have leverage here.
00:20:17So I tell your mom how fucked up you are?
00:20:20You're gonna hold that thing next to your face.
00:20:22And do what I say.
00:20:25I will leave Hailey alone.
00:20:30I will leave Hailey alone.
00:20:35Got it?
00:20:36Yeah.
00:20:36Let's go.
00:20:38What are you looking at?
00:20:43Got it?
00:20:44Let's go.
00:20:52Uh, thank you.
00:20:54Wow.
00:20:56Never thought I'd hear you say that.
00:21:00Why do you keep following me around?
00:21:02I just...
00:21:04I happen to see you.
00:21:06Were you waiting at someone?
00:21:08Yeah.
00:21:09My boyfriend, actually.
00:21:13Well, he...
00:21:14He kind of stood me up, so...
00:21:16Maybe you didn't do it on purpose.
00:21:20Maybe you got to do it nice to them.
00:21:22Cole, are you being nice to me?
00:21:26You thought we were enemies.
00:21:28I mean, I still find you incredibly annoying, though, so...
00:21:31Am I that annoying?
00:21:32Maybe you'll like me once you realize I have layers.
00:21:35Are you trying to play with my feelings, Cole Edna?
00:21:37Because it's not going to work.
00:21:38I'm like those stupid, spoiled heiresses.
00:21:46How'd that online boyfriend in your ears make you fall for her?
00:21:53He...
00:21:53He makes me feel safe.
00:21:56You wouldn't understand it, though.
00:22:02You don't understand better than you think.
00:22:05Cole understands me better than I think.
00:22:09Does he...
00:22:11How you touch him like this?
00:22:22If you keep staring, I'm going to think you like what you see.
00:22:26No, my...
00:22:28My boyfriend has way better abs than you do.
00:22:33In the game.
00:22:35Oh, in the game, huh?
00:22:43Why does he have to smell so good?
00:22:49Are you that slow to me, too?
00:22:53I can see why he likes you.
00:23:04I can't do this.
00:23:07I love my boyfriend.
00:23:08And you will never understand that.
00:23:10He's smart, and he's kind, and...
00:23:13He loves me for who I am.
00:23:16That is so much more important to me than whatever this is between us.
00:23:20I wish I could just tell her right now.
00:23:30Wait, it couldn't be.
00:23:34Cole, what was that notification on your phone?
00:23:39There's nothing.
00:23:40Cole, who are you?
00:23:44What was that notification on your phone?
00:23:46It was my dad telling me my car got done getting waxed.
00:23:51Champagne problems, huh?
00:23:54You live such a tough life.
00:24:00What was I thinking?
00:24:01We are from two different worlds.
00:24:03He just wants to play with me.
00:24:05But why did I want to kiss him so badly?
00:24:12Why didn't you come to school today?
00:24:13I got into a car accident.
00:24:16Really?
00:24:17Are you okay?
00:24:18You have to keep me in the hospital till prom.
00:24:20He was right.
00:24:21Who?
00:24:22Nobody.
00:24:23Which hospital are you staying at?
00:24:24I want to come visit you.
00:24:26No, no, you can't.
00:24:27I look miserable now.
00:24:28You need to see me in style.
00:24:30Fine, if you say so.
00:24:33So, are we going to prom together?
00:24:35Hell yeah, we are.
00:24:41Why would anyone want to sit next to her?
00:24:44Whoever needs a charity case.
00:25:01Oh, you.
00:25:03Oh, me.
00:25:04Why is she so lucky?
00:25:06Cole's never been this way with any other girl.
00:25:09People think you're really lucky to be my lab partner.
00:25:12I'm sure you feel really lucky to be my lab partner.
00:25:14Because you don't do any homework.
00:25:21You finished it?
00:25:23It's okay.
00:25:24We'll get to know each other more.
00:25:26I'm not that curious about you, actually.
00:25:27I'm curious about you, though.
00:25:29Like, uh, how close were you with your mom?
00:25:33What is he trying to do?
00:25:35It's none of your business, but I'm very close with my mom.
00:25:38I'd kill anyone who hurts her.
00:25:42Does Cole genuinely want to know me?
00:25:54So, are you going to prom?
00:25:56I don't know.
00:25:56I don't know.
00:25:57I don't know.
00:25:58So you have a date?
00:26:01Or shall I say victim?
00:26:03Are you jealous of me?
00:26:04Me?
00:26:05Jealous?
00:26:06No, why would I be jealous?
00:26:07Oh, because I think you so secretly want me.
00:26:10You are so full of yourself.
00:26:12You can do this on your own.
00:26:13Yeah.
00:26:16No way.
00:26:18It's a self-locking door.
00:26:20Really?
00:26:20Miss Corma's going to be back in an hour.
00:26:22I'm sure you'll be fine.
00:26:23I'm stuck here with you for a full hour?
00:26:25No.
00:26:26Sorry.
00:26:27Am I that bad?
00:26:28I think maybe we can pick up where we left off.
00:26:31Don't worry.
00:26:32Maybe trust me and do.
00:26:33Mm-mm.
00:26:34We're keeping our distance this time, actually.
00:26:36Yeah.
00:26:46That was my first kiss.
00:26:50My first kiss was not supposed to go like that.
00:26:53It was supposed to be special at prom and not just bumping lips.
00:27:07You're really good at this.
00:27:09Why don't you regret it?
00:27:11You know, we can do more if you want.
00:27:29Hey, I've been holding back a lot more than you think.
00:27:32So you want me?
00:27:36I think you know how much I want you.
00:27:42Do you want me?
00:27:44I want you.
00:27:50Oh, shit.
00:27:54Anyone in here?
00:27:58Oh, my God.
00:27:59How long have you two been in here?
00:28:00I really need to change this lock.
00:28:02Are you two okay?
00:28:04Oh.
00:28:04Yeah.
00:28:05Yeah, we're good.
00:28:06We're okay.
00:28:15You're just going to pretend like that didn't happen.
00:28:17What didn't happen?
00:28:18Hey, wait.
00:28:19It's just hormones.
00:28:21Jake.
00:28:23Can you still play after your accident?
00:28:25Relax, I'm not dead.
00:28:26Wait.
00:28:27Car accident?
00:28:28Guacamole wizard?
00:28:34I gotta go.
00:28:43Guacamole wizard?
00:28:44Huh?
00:28:47Are you all better after your car accident?
00:28:49Do I know you?
00:28:51Why is he being so standoffish?
00:28:53Is he trying to give me a surprise?
00:28:55Or he heard something about Cole?
00:28:58You're crushing your soda can.
00:29:01She thinks guacamole wizard is Jake Myers.
00:29:03She was in a real car accident.
00:29:05According to you, so is guacamole wizard.
00:29:08I can't take this anymore.
00:29:09Cole, wait.
00:29:12Oh, shit.
00:29:17What's up, guys?
00:29:18Um, we were just chatting.
00:29:21Chatting about Jake's grand plans to kick balls?
00:29:24Was there something that you wanted, Cole?
00:29:28Hey!
00:29:29Just figured I'd bring you some mozzarella sticks.
00:29:31They're your favorite, right?
00:29:35How did you know that?
00:29:37Tough day, huh?
00:29:38There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria.
00:29:40They're my favorite.
00:29:42He couldn't be Cole.
00:29:44Could he?
00:29:50The truth is, um...
00:29:51A dickhead?
00:29:54What do you honestly get out of here, bro?
00:29:55You came to my table, bro, and knocked my ball away.
00:30:05There it goes again.
00:30:06Cole is jealous.
00:30:08We got a problem here, Cole?
00:30:09We don't have a problem.
00:30:11We don't have a problem.
00:30:13Right?
00:30:14Tell Cole to get my ball, and we don't have a problem.
00:30:17Jake, it would take me forever to find one of your balls.
00:30:22I have the ball now.
00:30:23Could we stop measuring each other's dicks?
00:30:27Cole and Jake are fighting over Haley?
00:30:30Maybe I can use that.
00:30:34Jake!
00:30:35Hey!
00:30:36What if I told you that I have an internship opportunity for you with my dad?
00:30:40Wait, seriously?
00:30:41Yeah.
00:30:42Just one little catch.
00:30:43You have to pretend to like Haley Roth.
00:30:47All right, you have the rest of the period to work on your lab reports.
00:30:50If you have any questions, I'll be at my desk.
00:30:54I thought Guacamole Wizard would feel more like Cole.
00:30:58But if he's really Jake, then maybe this was always going to end.
00:31:02You've literally been sorry for five minutes.
00:31:04I'm thinking.
00:31:04About the report or about him?
00:31:06Why are you making it so weird about Jake?
00:31:08We literally made out of a sojourn.
00:31:11Maybe you've known Jake longer.
00:31:13No, you don't.
00:31:14How do you know that?
00:31:15You're going to prom with someone else.
00:31:17Stop acting like you're serious about me.
00:31:19You have no idea.
00:31:25Oh my God, is Jake asking me to prom?
00:31:41Hayley, someone's here to see you.
00:31:54Are you asking me to prom?
00:31:57Too cheesy?
00:31:58No, it's cute.
00:32:01The accident, the mozzarella sticks?
00:32:03He is Guacamole Wizard.
00:32:05So, um, what do you think?
00:32:08You want to go to prom with me?
00:32:10I...
00:32:11I should feel happy.
00:32:13But why does this feel so wrong?
00:32:17Hey, can we not?
00:32:20Hey, can we not?
00:32:23Dude, seriously, what is your problem?
00:32:25My problem here, dude, is that me and my lab partner have work to do.
00:32:28And you're out here to strike me with bad puns.
00:32:30Wow.
00:32:32That is some weak shit, man.
00:32:34Oh, that's weak shit?
00:32:36Is this weak shit?
00:32:39Oh my God.
00:32:48Wow, he's got really pretty eyes.
00:32:56Wait, I can't.
00:32:57Colt, put me down.
00:32:58Put me down.
00:32:59Put me down.
00:33:02Don't do that again.
00:33:15New couple alert.
00:33:18Fuck off, Jen.
00:33:19Why do you hate me so much, Colt?
00:33:21You and I, we're not that different.
00:33:23And if you'd realize and give me a chance,
00:33:25I think that we would make a great match.
00:33:27Like, say, if you asked me to prom.
00:33:30I might say yes.
00:33:33Jen, you want to go to prom with me?
00:33:37Jen, you want to go to prom with me?
00:33:40We're both hot, and we're both rich,
00:33:43and our dads have been in business, like, forever, so.
00:33:47I'll romantic.
00:33:47I think I'll pass.
00:33:50You're going to regret this, Colt Edmonds.
00:33:55Oh, here they come.
00:33:58If I message Corcomole Wizard,
00:34:00I wonder if Jake's phone were dinged.
00:34:03What should we wear to prom?
00:34:06And the dance list.
00:34:09Yeah.
00:34:15Um, I'll talk to you later.
00:34:17I'll see you around school, okay?
00:34:18Okay, yeah, I'll see you later.
00:34:19Bye.
00:34:20He's so different.
00:34:22Maybe he's still recovering from the accident?
00:34:24I'm saying we're...
00:34:27Hayley?
00:34:34What are you doing?
00:34:36Jeez.
00:34:37God.
00:34:43Here, I'll get it.
00:34:44Yeah, I know.
00:34:49Oh.
00:34:50You're scared of me seeing all the girls in your phone?
00:34:52I don't care.
00:34:53I do care.
00:34:55I do care.
00:34:56Hey, I...
00:35:13I don't put a problem with Jake.
00:35:15I mean, he only knows you like mozzarella sticks because of me.
00:35:18He doesn't even know you.
00:35:19And you do?
00:35:20How do you know I like mozzarella sticks?
00:35:22That's something I've only ever talked about.
00:35:24Because...
00:35:25I...
00:35:26pay attention to what you like.
00:35:28I noticed it at lunch.
00:35:30The first day.
00:35:32You were watching me?
00:35:34Just...
00:35:35Just don't go to college, Jake.
00:35:51Move!
00:35:52Cole is talking to Hayley.
00:35:54Again.
00:35:55Your job is to keep them away from each other, Jake.
00:35:58Unless you don't want that internship that my dad got you.
00:36:00Obviously I do.
00:36:01Okay, then break them up, idiot.
00:36:04Uh...
00:36:05What do I do?
00:36:07I've got a few ideas.
00:36:13Hey, look.
00:36:16Someone will take you to prom.
00:36:17I promise.
00:36:18Yeah?
00:36:19Really, like who?
00:36:20I mean, the whole school hates me, except for Jake.
00:36:24And you.
00:36:25But you're not asking me.
00:36:28Hey.
00:36:29Oh, hey, Jake.
00:36:31Hey, Hal.
00:36:32Um...
00:36:33I just wanted to thank you again for...
00:36:35The other night.
00:36:37The other night?
00:36:38Yeah, it was...
00:36:41So...
00:36:41Sexy.
00:36:43You're so sexy.
00:36:45Jake, what are you talking about?
00:36:47Oh!
00:36:48Uh, hate to break it to you, asshole,
00:36:51but she's my prom date.
00:36:56And she's a real tiger in the pep room.
00:37:00Oh!
00:37:01Oh, shit!
00:37:02Oh, shit!
00:37:17Oh, shit!
00:37:19Stop!
00:37:20Stop!
00:37:20Guys, stop it!
00:37:21Stop!
00:37:22Stop!
00:37:23What the hell is going on over there?
00:37:27Shit.
00:37:28It's Principal Stevens.
00:37:29I've got to save Cole.
00:37:31I mean, Jake.
00:37:31I've got to save Jake.
00:37:37Oh!
00:37:38Oh, my God!
00:37:39Principal Stevens, I'm so sorry!
00:37:42Hailey Rock, that's detention.
00:37:45After school, don't be late.
00:38:02Cole, what are you doing here?
00:38:05Can we keep you company?
00:38:07It's the least I could do if you saved my ass today.
00:38:12The locker thing, that was an accident.
00:38:14Oh, sure.
00:38:17So, uh, you and Jake, huh?
00:38:21No.
00:38:23He lied about that.
00:38:24I don't know why, though.
00:38:26Good.
00:38:28You know,
00:38:29father that asshole,
00:38:30every time he looks at you,
00:38:31makes me sick to my stomach.
00:38:33Thinking about him touching you, kissing you.
00:38:36I could kill him.
00:38:40Promise me you won't go to prom with it.
00:38:45Okay, fine.
00:38:46I won't.
00:38:49Because I want to go to prom with you.
00:38:54Okay, everyone.
00:38:55Let's start off by mixing our sodium bicarbonate.
00:39:04Oh, my God.
00:39:05I am so fed up with this.
00:39:09Oh, my God.
00:39:10Oh, my God.
00:39:10Oh, my God.
00:39:23Oh, my God.
00:39:25Sorry.
00:39:26I tripped.
00:39:28No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:39:29Beth!
00:39:30What?
00:39:31It always has to be about her, doesn't it?
00:39:36they're dead they're both dead oh how am i going to be able to talk to guacamole wizard
00:39:46oh what are you are you almost crying it's probably because you can't afford a new one
00:39:53jen what's going on over there
00:40:05no what's going on is jen is getting a taste of her own medicine
00:40:10mr edmunds oh please it's baking soda and water you're fine detention today after school
00:40:29jake hey oh uh sorry gotta get to student council
00:40:36hey you didn't even try the rice trick the rice trick
00:40:43yeah you don't know about the come on
00:41:00hey um ella it's emma yeah that's what i said can you hack a broken laptop
00:41:16hey it's gonna be okay we'll pour out in a few more minutes and it'll be like the whole
00:41:22thing never happened no it's not just the phone or the laptop it means it means i can't can't what
00:41:31i talked to a friend online he's really important to me
00:41:39and i'm sure you're really important to him
00:41:51you know cole if you look past all that hair gel and big ol ego and rich kid bravara
00:41:59okay okay i get it
00:42:04you're kind of sweet
00:42:09hey look at that
00:42:12oh my god
00:42:13oh my god
00:42:17you're a miracle worker
00:42:24oh what is taking so long
00:42:25you doused this thing in sodium bicarbonate
00:42:28shut up ella it's emma
00:42:30whatever
00:42:37oh my god
00:42:45oh morning valley whore
00:42:48how are things in the castle
00:42:54valley whore
00:42:56what are they talking about
00:43:12guacamole wizard when can we be together in person
00:43:16guacamole wizard i want you so badly i dream about you touching me
00:43:19oh my god someone hacked my castle claimers messages
00:43:22touch me guacamole wizard
00:43:26yeah hey valley whore show them what you really like
00:43:48here you go
00:43:49here this is for you
00:43:54oh do you like what i've done with the place
00:43:56you hacked my laptop
00:43:59oh no it wasn't me
00:44:00it was that kid ella
00:44:02but i definitely gotta reap the benefits
00:44:04what kind of incel sex over a video game
00:44:07hayley
00:44:07what are you catfishing this guy
00:44:09no i'm not trying to catfish him
00:44:11hey everyone
00:44:11i think valley whore is a catfish
00:44:15because who in their right mind would spend their time thirsting over you
00:44:43stop it stop stop
00:44:45stop it stop stop
00:44:48i thought i'd send the janitor some time
00:44:53jake
00:44:54hey
00:44:57now is the time
00:44:58tell them
00:44:59tell them what
00:45:00that you're guacamole wizard
00:45:04who's guacamole wizard
00:45:07here you go
00:45:10oh my god
00:45:11did you think that jake was your secret little online boyfriend
00:45:14oh sweetie
00:45:15i've been bribing him this whole time to pretend to like you
00:45:18what
00:45:19why would you do that
00:45:20oh i don't know cole
00:45:21why do you think i would do that
00:45:25jake
00:45:25is this true
00:45:26have you been pretending to like me this whole time
00:45:30sorry
00:45:31it was nothing personal
00:45:38yeah nothing personal
00:45:41oh
00:45:41oh
00:45:45oh
00:45:45oh
00:45:46oh
00:45:47all right
00:45:47all right
00:45:47all right
00:45:48enough
00:45:48what in the world is going on here
00:45:51is that a leaf blower
00:45:52that's all him
00:45:53okay well you both have detention so
00:46:01let me get this straight
00:46:02you stole a leaf blower
00:46:04and defaced school property
00:46:06it wasn't school property dad
00:46:08it was jen's cyber boy spreadsheets
00:46:10jesus christ
00:46:11how does she always get away with this shit
00:46:13could it be because her father's running for senate cole
00:46:15you think that's what it could be
00:46:17who cares
00:46:18i care
00:46:19and
00:46:20i hear she's got an eye for you
00:46:22so you're taking her to prom
00:46:24what
00:46:25over my dead body
00:46:27oh
00:46:27because you're like that hailey girl
00:46:30i'm firing her mother right now
00:46:31no no please don't
00:46:33please
00:46:34please
00:46:34then you're taking jen to prom
00:46:36max's dad called
00:46:37he said he's having a party tomorrow
00:46:39you're gonna go
00:46:40and you're gonna ask jen to prom
00:46:42end of discussion
00:46:49come on you big coward
00:46:50message him
00:46:52just do it
00:46:53just do it
00:46:56you must think i'm the biggest idiot
00:47:04i could never think that
00:47:12but i thought you were jake
00:47:13please can't you just tell me now
00:47:15i think i've had enough public humiliation for one lifetime
00:47:22i heard that guy max is throwing a party tomorrow
00:47:24if you want i'll meet you there
00:47:37okay
00:47:38okay
00:47:39you got this haley
00:47:40just take a deep breath
00:47:42you got this
00:47:43you got this
00:47:47you look beautiful
00:47:51thank you mom
00:48:18you got this
00:48:22Right now they don't care about shit get drunk girl
00:48:38What are you doing here Valley whore
00:48:43Looks like the catfish came out of the pond. Hey everyone. Let's give it up for Valley whore
00:48:52Jen, why are you doing this? What have I even done to you to me?
00:48:56Oh, I'm actually concerned about our whole community because those little cringy messages on your castle game
00:49:02Those are concerning actually kind of a bit of a perv. Did you know that Haley?
00:49:08She's a little pervy princess pervy princess
00:49:18Hey, let's get perfect tonight leave me alone
00:49:23What is there fire?
00:49:25Okay, we set off the alarm
00:49:38Oh
00:49:40Oh
00:49:41Oh
00:49:41Oh
00:49:42Oh
00:49:50Oh
00:49:51Oh
00:49:52Oh
00:49:54Oh
00:49:55Oh
00:49:55Oh
00:49:57Oh
00:49:58Oh
00:50:17are you him would you stop trying to find your stupid little cyber boyfriend
00:50:23okay cole is not him anyways we are going to the prom together
00:50:27no i'm not yes you are it's okay you can be honest about your feelings
00:50:34so you too this whole time
00:50:39oh my god i am such an idiot hey wait
00:50:48please at least take my jackets you know if you really wanted to humiliate me
00:50:53you didn't have to go to the extra effort jen was doing just fine i wasn't trying to humiliate
00:50:57you then what were you trying to do i guess you obviously the white clothes were just an added
00:51:02bonus i knew i shouldn't have trusted you
00:51:06and what about guacamole was it
00:51:08what are you
00:51:17who is that
00:51:18just the devil
00:51:22get in the car
00:51:26i'm not gonna ask you again cole get in the car
00:51:29can you just act normal for once and please introduce yourself to
00:51:32hayley
00:51:33i already assumed that's who this was
00:51:36hi mr happens
00:51:37so you're the scholarship trash that's hell bent on ruining cole's life
00:51:43well i've got news for you young lady my son is gonna marry a good girl from a respectable family
00:51:50and that's not you
00:51:51you will be forgotten
00:51:53you're a maid's daughter
00:51:55and your mom works for me
00:51:57stay away from him
00:51:59or i swear to god
00:52:00your mother is fire
00:52:03dad stop
00:52:03don't you touch my family
00:52:06i'll stay away
00:52:08hey come on you don't mean that
00:52:12i hate everything you stand for
00:52:15i hate your greed
00:52:16and your callousness
00:52:18and your elitist ideas of what you think a good person looks like
00:52:21i hate everything about you
00:52:23i hate all of it
00:52:24i don't want any part of it
00:52:27so cole
00:52:28go with your dad
00:52:31hayley
00:52:36fuck this
00:52:37that's me
00:52:40no laptop
00:52:41and no phone
00:52:42for a week
00:52:43ever since mom died
00:52:44you've turned into this co-patriarch
00:52:46hey we're not that's real love
00:52:47why do you have to make me so miserable
00:52:49i promised your mother i would make you a success son
00:52:52even if it meant saving you from yourself
00:53:03hi hayley
00:53:04i'm emma
00:53:05i know who you are
00:53:06right
00:53:07i just
00:53:08felt kind of bad
00:53:09that i accidentally helped
00:53:10and ruin your life
00:53:12so
00:53:12i wanted to return your laptop to you
00:53:14good as new
00:53:20oh wow
00:53:22thanks emma
00:53:23okay bye
00:53:29come on
00:53:29one down
00:53:30one to go
00:53:31you're so cool
00:53:33i know emma
00:53:34wanna go to prom
00:53:35why not
00:53:38let's get these lovebirds together
00:53:44hi mr edmund
00:53:45hi max
00:53:46and max's friend
00:53:48sorry we weren't expecting you
00:53:50cole's grounded
00:53:51oh he is
00:53:53but it was his 18th birthday today
00:53:55what can i say max
00:53:57actions have consequences
00:53:59birthday or no cole is grounded
00:54:02well that really sucks
00:54:04because he's also the president of the prom committee
00:54:08we were supposed to review budgets today
00:54:11cole
00:54:12my son cole
00:54:14reviewing budgets
00:54:15he's never reviewed a budget a day in his life
00:54:17well mr edmunds today could be that day
00:54:19and we just have to give him back this school sanctioned laptop
00:54:22so we can get back to his very important and very respectable budgetary work
00:54:35go away
00:54:40max what
00:54:41what are you guys doing here
00:54:42happy birthday cole
00:54:44i brought you my laptop and logged into your castle claimers account
00:54:47just get it back to me by tomorrow
00:54:49what's going on
00:54:51dude it's your 18th birthday
00:54:53you can tell hayley who you are now
00:54:54you can be together
00:54:55just log into this stupid game and tell the girl who you love who you really are
00:55:00no
00:55:01i'll tell her myself
00:55:03stick me in your car
00:55:11welcome all the wizard
00:55:14mom i'm fine
00:55:15i just need some time alone
00:55:25open the door
00:55:26open the door
00:55:27wait what
00:55:28he's here
00:55:37it's you
00:55:39i should've given you this to you a long time
00:55:41ago
00:55:43hayley i've wanted to tell you who i was from the very beginning
00:55:46my dad threatened to follow your mom and i had to wait a really long time
00:55:50to tell you who i was
00:55:51i got my inheritance
00:55:53and i can protect you and your family and so you don't have to choose
00:56:08thanks
00:56:08i understand if this changes things
00:56:12if
00:56:13you don't love me the way
00:56:15you love guacamole wizard but
00:56:19i
00:56:19look i need you to know i love you
00:56:32look i need you to know i love you
00:56:34you do
00:56:36yes you idiot
00:56:38i've loved you for months
00:56:39i mean
00:56:40this whole guacamole wizard thing was so confusing though
00:56:43because i had to be loyal to him and
00:56:46but you're him
00:56:48you didn't expect her
00:56:50i mean i
00:56:52i always hoped it was you
00:56:55do you hope to
00:56:57yes
00:56:58i hoped it was you
00:57:00you were always there for me
00:57:03you're hot now
00:57:06you're really fucking hot
00:57:11hey uh
00:57:12one of those things i said we could do
00:57:16here we go
00:57:17yeah
00:57:20i'll take my clothes off
00:57:22i'm getting there don't worry
00:57:26i'm so real you
00:57:28just be on me
00:57:50i'll get sex with sex with me specifically
00:57:54i've only ever had sex with you specifically
00:57:56i've only ever had sex with you specifically
00:57:58all right
00:57:58all right that's fair
00:57:59I'll, uh, I'll take that as a win.
00:58:07What is my life now?
00:58:09Am I being nice to Cole Edmonds?
00:58:11Mm, oh, God, no.
00:58:12I fully expect you to continue to berate me endlessly.
00:58:17No, I'll just, I'll just lust behind it.
00:58:20There's always been lust behind it.
00:58:21I'll see you in a minute now.
00:58:23Stop it.
00:58:26Um, same.
00:58:29Is it prom the night?
00:58:31I think you know if it's prom or not.
00:58:34Okay.
00:58:36But the real question is, do you got a date?
00:58:40Cole, are you asking me to prom?
00:58:42Oh, I would have asked you earlier,
00:58:44but Jay kind of gave me to the show.
00:58:46Oh, God, please don't mention his name again.
00:58:48I don't want to hear it.
00:58:50Yeah, you don't have to ask me twice.
00:58:51But I don't even have a dress.
00:58:54Wait here.
00:58:59I just slept with Cole Edmonds, and I'm in love with Cole Edmonds.
00:59:03Who would have guessed?
00:59:07I thought, only the best for my princess.
00:59:11Where did you get that?
00:59:14I might have gotten you a dress on the off chance that you might have wanted to go to prom
00:59:20with me,
00:59:21and maybe had nothing to wear.
00:59:24Of course I'll go to prom with you.
00:59:31Mr. Edmonds, I'd expect you to be here.
00:59:34Cole, are you here?
00:59:36Cole, are you here?
00:59:39What?
00:59:40Mr. Edmonds, you can't just barge into my house like this.
00:59:43I see you, Cole, you are in big trouble.
01:00:01Hey, uh, you almost done in there?
01:00:04You try changing into an evening gown in a bunch of thorny bushes.
01:00:10Okay, I'm ready.
01:00:22What do you think?
01:00:27My god, Haley, you are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.
01:00:32Uh-uh-uh.
01:00:33I just hunched over in a car mirror to do this lipstick.
01:00:36You're not messing it up for at least 20 minutes.
01:00:3920 more minutes.
01:00:41We're in.
01:00:42Deal.
01:00:45Thank you all for using the prom voting site to cast your votes.
01:00:50I hear we have a winner.
01:00:53And your 2026 prom queen is...
01:00:58Jen Longfellow.
01:00:59No!
01:01:01Thank you!
01:01:02Oh my god!
01:01:04Thank you guys so much.
01:01:07Seriously, this makes the world to me.
01:01:08I mean, like, who else would win, right?
01:01:12Oh, this is just the perfect moment.
01:01:18Oh my god, that's Haley and Cole.
01:01:22It was fucked.
01:01:23It's very too bad.
01:01:24Yeah, this is crazy.
01:01:28Hey, uh, this time that's up.
01:01:31No.
01:01:32But who cares?
01:01:35Hell yeah.
01:01:36Woo!
01:01:39Ew!
01:01:40Literally, what the fuck?
01:01:41Damn.
01:01:42Language.
01:01:43I am the queen, okay?
01:01:44She's just a little pervy princess.
01:01:46Come on!
01:01:47Everyone say it with me!
01:01:49Pervy princess!
01:01:50Pervy princess!
01:01:51Pervy princess!
01:01:58Pervy princess!
01:01:59Hey, what are those?
01:02:00Those are texts between me and my dad.
01:02:02Make Cole Edmonds fall in love with you.
01:02:05His dad's month is essential to funding my campaign.
01:02:09Don't worry, daddy.
01:02:10If I can't have it, then no one can.
01:02:14I'm gonna destroy Haley Roth's life.
01:02:16Is this real?
01:02:18Jen's crazy.
01:02:21Who did this?
01:02:22Who did this?
01:02:26What?
01:02:26You exploited me for a hacking job
01:02:28and didn't think I was gonna hack your phone?
01:02:30You little skit!
01:02:32You know, Jen, as the principal,
01:02:35I'm supposed to remain impartial
01:02:37and above all of this petty drama.
01:02:41But quite frankly, you are the worst.
01:02:45And I think it's time that you are expelled
01:02:48from Edmonds Academy.
01:02:49You can't do that!
01:02:51I'm the principal, so yes, I can.
01:02:58Oh!
01:02:59Oh my God!
01:03:01Oh my God!
01:03:03There was no winter chick!
01:03:05You lied to me!
01:03:06Oh my God!
01:03:18Oh my God!
01:03:24Oh!
01:03:26Get her!
01:03:26All I have to offer is a Bowie Knight
01:03:29with a chip on his shoulder
01:03:31and an awesome sense of humor.
01:03:33Oof!
01:03:34How can I refuse?
01:03:41Oh no, that's my dad.
01:03:45We are going home right now.
01:03:48You disobeyed me for the last time, boy.
01:03:50Yeah, I'm not a boy, Dad.
01:03:53You talk all the time
01:03:54about wanting a man that's worthy
01:03:56of the family last name.
01:03:57Yet, you can't see I've already become that man.
01:04:01And it's because of Hayley.
01:04:02And you can accept that,
01:04:04or I'll make my own path.
01:04:05And best believe me, I can.
01:04:08I'll say this.
01:04:10It's the most backbone I've ever seen in you, Cole.
01:04:15Joy Pro.
01:04:23I am so proud of you.
01:04:26I can't have done it without you being by my son.
01:04:29That was terrifying.
01:04:31It's not like we haven't slayed a dragon before.
01:04:34Well, so...
01:04:35I love you, Bella Quinn.
01:04:37I love you, guacamole wizard.
01:04:40Oh my God, I gotta change that username.
01:04:41Yeah, you do.
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