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FULL MOVIES ENGLISH SUB (2026) - FULL | Reelshort
#drama #cdrama #romantic #love #movie #shortdrama #showhot2026
FULL MOVIES ENGLISH SUB (2026) - FULL | Reelshort
#drama #cdrama #romantic #love #movie #shortdrama #showhot2026
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:28Transcribed by ESO, translated by —
00:00:30my beautiful sane daughter I literally never have to worry about you that's
00:00:37nice mom yeah call you the sane one now as you should excuse me I just need to
00:00:43take this yellow mm-hmm okay okay bye-bye is this a bad time
00:00:52apologies the government just needed to run some budget stuff past a very sane
00:00:56person it's not unlucky to have someone so wildly sane as a client
00:01:05I need you to help me hello I need you to help me
00:01:18what's going on can I borrow your white noise machine
00:01:27my room sounds like ghosts
00:01:31get out
00:01:33so we built a mountain by digging out a mighty hole
00:01:54and thought our books we carried every rock and stone
00:02:01but now the holes be put
00:02:03than anybody ever planned
00:02:06but there's your tips
00:02:07I've hung it up
00:02:10so we say to
00:02:12but I can't do this evil on my own
00:02:14I haven't wrapped the house in nearly 30,000
00:02:16call me up to
00:02:19is this too early early I'm up at 6 a.m. every day in case someone's died in the night
00:02:23wow they do say mental illness is hereditary I barely slept anyway I hate that you're so
00:02:29far away okay I'm in Surrey bad enough when you move back to your flat I am fine mom I'm
00:02:36in my
00:02:36stable girl era I'm on medication that isn't trying to kill me I use retinol and
00:02:41hello fresh I am a bridesmaid in a posh wedding for God's sake has anyone heard from Eddie she come
00:02:46in
00:02:46she's no there's no way it's been a year she didn't even RSVP which I'm not even
00:02:53thinking about that mom just stop worrying okay I'm allowed to be worried
00:02:56Maggie it is your first time leaving Townsend's Lithium Poisoning
00:03:02I said it's your first time leaving Townsend's Lithium Poisoning
00:03:04look I heard you mom just I need to get going okay
00:03:07what on earth this may have fun I need you so early for
00:03:10I don't know bridesmaid stuff filming awkward tiktoks and matching satin pyjamas
00:03:14and telling someone her skin looks clear I am a normal person
00:03:22normal who wants to be normal I do well if you get overwhelmed or feel bad in
00:03:27any way just call me I won't mom this is going to be a nice easy chill this is not
00:03:33one of your kooky hackneyed town hall weddings where the bride wears a jumpsuit
00:03:38and drinks lager from a can this is the home counties we take this seriously I have barely
00:03:46slept Mercury cried all night no did he Simone has had a complicated reaction to her premarital
00:03:55juice cleanse I will never forgive heat magazine for what it did to us so to avoid my brother saying
00:04:00I do to a woman wearing an adult nappy I will be busy trying to plug the leak as it
00:04:06were
00:04:08yes those were Simone's choices I suppose she wanted her culture represented to
00:04:13you hmm please wear them so as to differentiate yourselves from the staff and Flopsy is it
00:04:21yeah um why am why does my massage say this my reputation as a maid of honor a role I
00:04:30take
00:04:31extremely seriously it's immaculate I am in constant demand and this is my brother's wedding my favorite
00:04:37brother the only brother that isn't balding and as from what I understand you have a bit of a reputation
00:04:43a somewhat of a loose cannon hmm I think this would be a better fit hmm off you pop now
00:04:52I have
00:04:52written down your bridesmaids tasks in extremely simple terms so I am assuming there are no questions
00:05:02I left Simone lying face down in an antique chamber pot so I ought to uh what does train the
00:05:07swans mean
00:05:08is assist Jesse Ware slaying for something I have not heard a thing from the fourth bridesmaid
00:05:12has anyone had contact with her she's ignored all communications
00:05:18uh no no she she won't be coming
00:05:28and if I see anyone vaping they will be fined
00:05:36I cannot wait for my bridesmaid years to be over what was Aldi Pippa Middleton saying to him
00:05:42nothing it's grand anyways we only have to deal with her for one day Simone has done worse for us
00:05:47like when she sucked on storms his weird old roadies to get us back staying
00:05:49exactly well strapping fuckers because things are about to get worse worse than unpaid labor
00:05:53remember Simone's ex Jack Jack Pearl one who couldn't stop telling us that he once played pool with Amy Winehouse
00:05:59oh he was awful he used to sniff out a guitar at a house bedroom like an indie bloodhound
00:06:04yeah well he's threatened to turn up and ruin the wedding oh for fuck's sake hot girls are meant to
00:06:08marry
00:06:08rich is there right he wouldn't really turn up here
00:06:10Simone seems to think he might he has previous after she got engaged she tried to break into her house
00:06:15if it is wild that we just let straight men run loose
00:06:17yeah so we need to keep an eye out
00:06:20for what a trilby the opening cords that can't stand me now
00:06:23I've got potstar to wrangle
00:06:25yeah well I've got gargoyle's wax
00:06:29no one said this right when shit was easy
00:07:05oh my god sorry I just it suckered onto me and I could feel it's like monster tongue
00:07:11there I was thinking I'd given you the simplest tasks there were
00:07:16I could do it I just once I get these gloves on I will be de-leaching at speeds never
00:07:21seen before
00:07:22see that you are
00:07:23and um if I do everything on my list which I will um could I have a normal bridesmaid
00:07:34perhaps
00:07:38oh
00:07:50oh
00:07:51oh
00:07:52oh
00:07:54oh
00:07:55oh
00:07:56oh
00:08:06I'm sure I saw someone in the penis room
00:08:08but when I look at that it was nothing there
00:08:12what happened to you?
00:08:14the swans have a very aggressive communication style
00:08:16we're working through it
00:08:17I take the swans over Jessie Ware any day
00:08:19she is insane
00:08:20I found her in the kitchen neck in cooking sherry
00:08:23and when I tried to grab it off her
00:08:24she called me a slur
00:08:25she called you a little bee
00:08:26and I consider that as well
00:08:27what's with the meat?
00:08:28what's with the meat?
00:08:29oh I was just I'm feeding the altar boys
00:08:31listen
00:08:32I have a weird feeling that someone is like here
00:08:36watching us
00:08:37yes
00:08:38I meant to be more like
00:08:41a pearl
00:08:42has entered the oyster
00:08:44jack pearl
00:08:46so we should split off
00:08:47distracting everybody else now
00:08:49are we?
00:08:50no
00:08:50no no no
00:08:51no no don't worry
00:08:51I put all the meat in the boys
00:08:54I meant
00:08:55I need you to put your bridesmaid's dresses on
00:08:58and meet me in the main hall as quickly as possible
00:09:00if you can manage that
00:09:03yes
00:09:06off you go
00:09:09god who pissed on her raga
00:09:10just do what she says
00:09:11I'll be gonna hunt for jack pearl later
00:09:14if she's dressed as a sheer or something
00:09:15I am going to shank Simone
00:09:17I'll be bog standard
00:09:18pastel satin babe
00:09:19don't worry
00:09:24Ryan
00:09:24your tabard is unacceptable
00:09:26okay
00:09:27well um
00:09:27first off
00:09:28what the fuck is it about
00:09:30so we're actually wearing these
00:09:33World War I nurses uniforms
00:09:35is that a problem?
00:09:36god no
00:09:37no
00:09:37no no no
00:09:38I love war
00:09:39yeah
00:09:39it just seems like a weird tradition
00:09:42even by the aristocracy standards
00:09:44sister
00:09:45take it be you
00:09:47saved
00:09:47my grandfather's life
00:09:49of the battle of Cambrai
00:09:52trampled by a horse
00:09:53poor fellow
00:09:54crushed his skull to smithereens
00:09:57somehow
00:09:59he pulled through
00:10:00thanks to
00:10:02sister Peggy
00:10:03who tended to him
00:10:04day and night
00:10:05upon his return
00:10:07home
00:10:08he did
00:10:09two things
00:10:10first
00:10:11he vowed
00:10:12to honour
00:10:13sister Peggy
00:10:14at every
00:10:15family
00:10:16wedding
00:10:16from that
00:10:18day forth
00:10:19hmm
00:10:22and
00:10:23and the second thing
00:10:24he stabbed every horse
00:10:25in the stable to death
00:10:26oh
00:10:28wow
00:10:29wow
00:10:30what an honour
00:10:31to represent the
00:10:34British army
00:10:36in this way
00:10:38I mean I'm Irish
00:10:39of course
00:10:40but you can't help but respect
00:10:42the empire
00:10:43to ignore like
00:10:4590% of the history
00:10:46and focus on things
00:10:47like the tea
00:10:48and the fun uniforms
00:10:49a lot
00:11:09good nurse
00:11:11what would grandfather
00:11:12say about you
00:11:14okay uncle Albert
00:11:15let's get you back
00:11:16to the rest of the family
00:11:17we've actually been looking for you
00:11:19for hours
00:11:24Eddie
00:11:27are you wearing a bindi
00:11:29I had no idea you were coming
00:11:30yeah it was kind of a last minute decision
00:11:33huh
00:11:35okay um
00:11:36hug me then bitch
00:11:42oh I had no idea
00:11:44why would you
00:11:45where the fuck have you been
00:11:46California mostly
00:11:47oh
00:11:49so somewhere that definitely does have wifi then
00:11:51turns out there's more to life than social media
00:11:58I'd love it if we could talk
00:12:01one on one
00:12:02it's kind of why I came
00:12:03oh
00:12:04I mean yeah
00:12:05yeah of course
00:12:06right
00:12:07now that our fourth bridesmaid
00:12:09has finally arrived
00:12:10Eddie
00:12:10is it
00:12:12I'm putting you in charge
00:12:13of making sure the chapel
00:12:14is ready to go
00:12:15the rest of you back to your time
00:12:16oh
00:12:16actually
00:12:18I've done all mine
00:12:20you've moistened the taxidermy
00:12:22you've cut the Nazis out of the portraits
00:12:24yeah
00:12:24yeah
00:12:24that one took a while
00:12:26but um
00:12:26oh
00:12:27I have to say I'm pleasantly surprised
00:12:31so
00:12:33the sash
00:12:34oh
00:12:35yes
00:12:37this is for you
00:12:39it's from Simone
00:12:40hence the quality of the fabric
00:12:42no
00:12:42no no
00:12:43it's too close
00:12:44sorry
00:12:44um
00:12:47you said if I
00:12:49if I finish all my tasks
00:12:51I could have a normal
00:12:52sash
00:12:53oh
00:12:55I'm not sure that's quite
00:12:56what I said
00:12:57why don't we see how you do
00:12:59during the ceremony
00:13:00if we can avoid any big scenes
00:13:03then we'll see
00:13:03Flopsy
00:13:04we need you
00:13:04the flowers are pink
00:13:06the flowers are what
00:13:08if that florist thinks she'll work in Surrey again
00:13:10she has another thing coming
00:13:11first the ribbon debacle
00:13:12and now this
00:13:21so
00:13:22could you show me to this chapel
00:13:39it's nice
00:13:42but it's haunted
00:13:46but like according to Ryan
00:13:48Ryan thinks the Dalston McDonald's is haunted
00:13:53so
00:13:55how have you been
00:13:58I'm sorry I haven't reached out
00:14:00I needed time
00:14:02to think
00:14:03about
00:14:04everything but
00:14:07also about us
00:14:12look this might be hard to hear
00:14:14but
00:14:15look
00:14:17shh
00:14:17shh
00:14:19shh
00:14:19look
00:14:21I'll explain later
00:14:22right now
00:14:25we need to attack the man
00:14:26that's behind those flowers
00:14:40diamond weapon
00:14:41oh god
00:14:42not jack pearl
00:14:44that's plastic by the way
00:14:46I am here
00:14:47to object to this wedding
00:14:48like it's shrek
00:14:49oh you are not the shrek
00:14:50you are the fuck
00:14:51what
00:14:51are you seriously going to ruin Simone's wedding
00:14:54just because she wants me
00:14:55the poor choice to go out with you
00:14:56go out with me
00:14:58we're married
00:15:00yeah
00:15:00didn't know that part did you
00:15:02got married in Vegas
00:15:03Simone thought it didn't count
00:15:05because she was wearing a bikini at the time
00:15:06but it did
00:15:07shh
00:15:07so I'm here as a lawfully wedded husband
00:15:09to stand up
00:15:11and get big of me
00:15:12ow
00:15:12get off
00:15:13don't touch me
00:15:14I've got the law on myself
00:15:15have you always been nuns you two
00:15:17shut up
00:15:18could you not have just sent her a text
00:15:20she blocked me
00:15:21can you believe that
00:15:23like we was partners
00:15:24yeah
00:15:25and now
00:15:26it's like
00:15:26we're strangers
00:15:28you know
00:15:29I know
00:15:31it's hard to
00:15:33be the one that's still in love
00:15:36yuck
00:15:36I don't love her
00:15:37I just want a hundred grand
00:15:38to stay quiet
00:15:39oh you are such a fucking
00:15:40fuckwars
00:15:42what was that
00:15:43swan win
00:15:44guys
00:15:44kick off us in 20
00:15:45we need to get them out of here
00:15:46Anya
00:15:47I assume you brought the birds
00:15:48they've accepted me as their leader
00:15:50good
00:15:51I think they might be able to help
00:15:55you can't do this to me
00:15:57my cousin knows Rob Rinder
00:15:59now what
00:16:00we can't leave him up here on his own
00:16:01help
00:16:02help me
00:16:03I've been kidnapped by riches
00:16:12oh god
00:16:13Flopsy's asking where we are
00:16:15just in the attic
00:16:17babe
00:16:17no
00:16:18why would you tell her that
00:16:19do you not say that
00:16:20no it did
00:16:20my thumbs have millennial smartphone muscle memory
00:16:23oh gosh
00:16:24she can hear the moly
00:16:25okay okay
00:16:25just let me think
00:16:27she's coming up here
00:16:27she can't
00:16:28it's not birth
00:16:28oh my god how
00:16:29it's alert
00:16:30I'm just giving birth
00:16:31there's no baby
00:16:32hang on I can try
00:16:33I've got a call
00:16:33hello it's me
00:16:37the noises
00:16:38tell her I've had like an episode
00:16:39no
00:16:40I mean I can stay up here with Jack
00:16:41so we can't escape
00:16:41the rest of you can go be bridesmaids
00:16:43no Megs
00:16:44if someone needs to stay
00:16:45I'll do it
00:16:45straight wedding is a boring
00:16:46as fuck anyway
00:16:47no it has to be me
00:16:49Flopsy won't believe it's anyone else
00:16:50it's her only choice
00:16:51just go
00:16:55the bells
00:16:57the bells
00:17:00the bells
00:17:01Oh, my God.
00:17:47You're too small to subdue him.
00:17:50I've heard any complaints.
00:18:05So, do you want to have that talk?
00:18:10Not now.
00:18:12Let's just watch the wedding.
00:18:13Let's do it.
00:18:53Oh, my God.
00:18:54Maggie, are you feeling better?
00:18:55Yeah.
00:18:55All good, thank you.
00:19:01Done?
00:19:02Yep.
00:19:03Owen's got him trussed up in an hour to service Lou.
00:19:05I'm not sure what he's going to do with him exactly.
00:19:07No, he'll be fine.
00:19:08He's done this sort of thing before.
00:19:17Fuck Flopsy, man.
00:19:18She's got a rabbit's name.
00:19:20I can't believe we missed the food.
00:19:21I am starving.
00:19:23Will we go pillage a pantry?
00:19:25We've always wanted to see a pantry.
00:19:26Well, then, we must.
00:19:30Hurry up.
00:19:31For the servants to eat all the leftovers.
00:19:32We are the servants.
00:19:36Not to brag, but I will find a kitchen using only my nose.
00:19:39Yeah, I believe it.
00:19:41Eddie?
00:19:42Finally!
00:19:45Oh, I'm sorry.
00:19:47I'm so late.
00:19:47I got lost finding our new apartment.
00:19:50I ended up somewhere called Tottingham.
00:19:52And this guy with no teeth, he tried to sell me a horse.
00:20:00Oh, I'm sorry.
00:20:01This is my friend.
00:20:03Hi, I'm Whitney.
00:20:04You must be Maggie.
00:20:08I must be, yeah.
00:20:10God, I bet I look a mess.
00:20:12I literally grabbed whatever was at the top of my suitcase and ran.
00:20:16No, no, no.
00:20:17You look stunning.
00:20:19Oh, thank you.
00:20:26Drinkies?
00:20:27Let's do it.
00:20:31Well, yeah.
00:20:33Yeah.
00:20:34Why aren't you dressed like Florence Nightingale?
00:20:37I could be a millionaire.
00:20:39If I had the money.
00:20:44So, has it been awful?
00:20:47No, not awful.
00:20:50Did you tell her?
00:20:52I was going to, but then there was this whole mad drama.
00:20:56It's okay.
00:20:57It's okay.
00:20:58I'm here now.
00:21:00I want to help.
00:21:01Yeah.
00:21:03And you'll feel so much better once you sit her down and say,
00:21:07I'm sorry, but I cannot have you in my life anymore.
00:21:12I'm going to do it soon.
00:21:21Just not tonight.
00:21:28Cheer up, little boy.
00:21:31Today is a wonderful day.
00:21:36Today is a wonderful day.
00:21:39Mercury?
00:21:40Do we need another tetanus job?
00:21:47Would anyone like a ginseng gummy?
00:21:52It'll really help regulate your energy levels.
00:21:55No.
00:21:57I mean, I've also got echinacea, milk thistle, ginger chews.
00:22:04Yeah, or I've got, um, like, expired femme fresh wipes.
00:22:10No?
00:22:11Fine.
00:22:13I'm going to go and chew.
00:22:17For a black hat.
00:22:29Hey, if you're worried about vaginal odour,
00:22:32I can send you a link to an amethyst suppository my friend Wave sells.
00:22:36I mean, it'll really help.
00:22:38So it's amethyst suppository?
00:22:41So like a stone tampon?
00:22:48Sorry, it does sound a bit medieval.
00:22:52Yeah.
00:22:56Yeah, I guess it does.
00:22:58But it has helped a lot of women.
00:23:01I actually did a series of videos on the Vagina Red Connection.
00:23:05Oh, okay, you're a filmmaker.
00:23:07No.
00:23:08No, God.
00:23:09No, I don't even own a television.
00:23:11No, I'm a light worker.
00:23:13But I primarily produce content for social media.
00:23:16I just found that that's the best way to reach people and connect with souls all around the world.
00:23:22Is that Eddie fucking Rushton?
00:23:24Oh, my God, Tony!
00:23:28Oh, a non-progression wainers.
00:23:29Oh, my God, buy one, get one.
00:23:31What?
00:23:32Where the piss have you two been?
00:23:34I've been haggless at Superstore for months.
00:23:36Hi, I'm Whitney.
00:23:38Congratulations.
00:23:39Sorry, Whitney, this is Tony.
00:23:40Tony and Guy, drag queen to both the stars and the gutter.
00:23:45How are you, babe?
00:23:47I heard you've got mercury poisoning.
00:23:48Did you eat too much tuna?
00:23:50No, not mercury.
00:23:51Lithium poisoning.
00:23:52You ate batteries?
00:23:53What have you been up to?
00:23:54Down the drag mines, as ever.
00:23:56I actually had this last-minute gig come in for tonight.
00:23:58I'd usually tell them to fuck off.
00:24:00You don't say no to Barbie and Skipper, do you?
00:24:02Wait, what did you just say?
00:24:04Barbie and Skipper?
00:24:11Barbie and Skipper, like the dolls?
00:24:13They're drag queens, but like, so much more.
00:24:15Yeah, yeah, yeah, they've got a podcast of books.
00:24:16And YouTube series that we used to watch on repeat.
00:24:18Oh, no, I still do.
00:24:18I still do.
00:24:19We always said if they ever came to London, but they never have.
00:24:21The Skipper hates the accent.
00:24:23Oh, my God.
00:24:23Please, get the tickets.
00:24:24Please, we have one of the figures, please.
00:24:26Babe, do you have any idea how many fit men I have in my DMs right now
00:24:29asking me the same thing?
00:24:31No offense, but I'm not going to pick the straight girls.
00:24:33Straight-ish.
00:24:34Come on, Tony, we'll do anything.
00:24:35I never made you settle your wet mouth tab.
00:24:40Okay, look, I need this wig.
00:24:42My friend Cher's been styling for me,
00:24:43but she's being a bitch and refusing to give me it.
00:24:45We can get your wig.
00:24:46We can?
00:24:51Oh, God, sorry.
00:24:53I just totally disrupted your flow.
00:24:56God, what a loser.
00:24:57Oh, I'm sorry.
00:24:59Wait, um, we're being a bitch.
00:25:01It's just, this is kind of a dream of mine, an old dream, but...
00:25:06But we have to honor our old dreams to make space for new ones.
00:25:10That's beautiful, though.
00:25:12I know we had other plans today, and I was going to start looking for a job.
00:25:15No, listen, the only plan that matters is the universe's.
00:25:21So that's the address?
00:25:22All right, watch out, though.
00:25:24Cher can be, how you say, a cunt.
00:25:29I'll need it by eight.
00:25:30If you're not there, I'll fish your dad.
00:25:33Good luck with ours.
00:25:35You'll have to un-cremate them first.
00:25:37Oh, is your dad's?
00:25:39Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:25:40He passed when I was 12.
00:25:43It's actually how we first connected.
00:25:47Oh, that's so lovely.
00:25:52What, are you sure we can't just get the tube?
00:25:53This place is in, like, zone 10.
00:25:55I didn't even know it existed.
00:25:56Uber, then.
00:25:57You said it would be 80 quid.
00:25:58That's mad.
00:25:58We'll keep the spare car key in this stupid key safe here.
00:26:01We don't even need to knock on the door.
00:26:02Well, you don't want to give him a heads up.
00:26:04Just in case he thinks it's been stolen.
00:26:06Like, stolen by a stranger rather than a close friend.
00:26:09He won't care.
00:26:21So, you are a lightworker.
00:26:23I am.
00:26:25Which is what?
00:26:26Sorry, I don't.
00:26:26Oh, yeah.
00:26:28It basically means that I have been put on this earth to spread light and eradicate darkness.
00:26:34Oh, well, okay.
00:26:36Like Batman.
00:26:37No.
00:26:38He's changed the code.
00:26:40Shit, I thought this was a slam dunk.
00:26:42Okay, well, this is how Patrick Swayze does it in Dirty Dancing.
00:26:46So, we're just going to...
00:26:47Is this over here?
00:26:48Yes.
00:26:49Okay.
00:26:52I'm okay.
00:26:53It's just...
00:26:55Okay.
00:26:57All right.
00:27:00Just, like, shield your eyes and I'll...
00:27:02What are you doing?
00:27:04Hey, violence is never the answer, Maggie.
00:27:06No, it's not violence if it's against a car, is it?
00:27:08It's just like...
00:27:10Oh, I didn't even smash anything!
00:27:12Excuse me.
00:27:13I'm afraid I have a weapon.
00:27:19Oh, I'd love it if that could stop!
00:27:21Oh!
00:27:22Sorry!
00:27:24Oh.
00:27:26You're...
00:27:27You're back?
00:27:28Only just.
00:27:29Yesterday, actually.
00:27:30But I've been emailing you for a year.
00:27:32No.
00:27:33I'm off grid.
00:27:33Out of the Matrix.
00:27:35You don't have a phone?
00:27:36No.
00:27:37Oh.
00:27:38Well, I thought it was very, um...
00:27:40Amish-chic of you.
00:27:41It's not Amish to disengage from something that's literally killing people.
00:27:44Phones are killing people.
00:27:45They're worse for you than smoking.
00:27:48Hi.
00:27:48I'm Whitney.
00:27:49And you...
00:27:51must be Will.
00:27:53Sorry, just back to the phone thing again.
00:27:55You have a phone.
00:27:57To serve my higher purpose of spreading light via social media.
00:28:00Otherwise, you know, I would throw this thing into the ocean.
00:28:03Trust me.
00:28:05Sorry.
00:28:06Were you...
00:28:06Breaking into my car?
00:28:08Can we borrow it?
00:28:09Just for the afternoon?
00:28:12Of course.
00:28:13Yeah.
00:28:14Sure.
00:28:25I'd love it if we could talk.
00:28:27Maybe when you, uh, bring back the car.
00:28:40So we all hate Will now, then?
00:28:42I don't hate anybody.
00:28:44Hate is a poison.
00:28:45The friction between the old and the new can often feel uncomfortable.
00:28:48Well, then, maybe the new should smooth itself out a bit.
00:28:51To liberty or Jehovah's.
00:28:53What?
00:28:53Because I've already had two Jehovah's up here this week.
00:28:56And I'm not being funny or not.
00:28:57But I don't think I'm for you.
00:28:58No, no, no, no.
00:28:59We're afraid of Tony's.
00:29:00Tony and I, we came here to get her wig.
00:29:05Maybe she's coming down?
00:29:07Uh, Cher, sorry.
00:29:08All right, we're actually in a bit of a hurry, so if you could just...
00:29:10If you think it can intimidate me, you're fucking wrong.
00:29:14I've got a taser in here that because it's 3D printed, and I know how to use it.
00:29:19Stop throwing hairpins and just give us the wig.
00:29:22Did Tony tell you she's been shagging me stepdad?
00:29:24She's torn my family apart.
00:29:26Me mother's had to go impatient.
00:29:29That's almost impossible to defend.
00:29:31Maybe if I try and talk to her one-on-one, I...
00:29:33All right, I'd be happy to try.
00:29:35Um, no offense, Whitney, but I think you might be a bit too...
00:29:38American for someone like Cher.
00:29:40Well, Whitney should go.
00:29:41She's always so calm in the face of chaos.
00:29:43Okay, well, let's really throw a hairdryer, aren't you, but...
00:29:45Cher?
00:29:46My name's Whitney, and I'm a lightworker specializing in interpersonal relationships.
00:29:52May I come in?
00:29:59What's that?
00:30:07So, you were saying earlier you were looking for a job.
00:30:09What about your wet mouth money?
00:30:11I can't live off that forever.
00:30:13Besides, I need to save that for...
00:30:16I need to save that money.
00:30:19Is Whitney looking for a job, or...
00:30:21Did she make money off TikTok, or...
00:30:23I knew you'd hate her.
00:30:24No, I just...
00:30:25Look, I know she's kooky and different to you, and she might use words that you think are stupid,
00:30:30but Whitney has helped me so much.
00:30:34When we met, I, uh...
00:30:37I was in a really dark place.
00:30:40I was sat on a beach in Malibu, and I...
00:30:48I'm lucky to have found her.
00:30:50We've basically spent every day together since.
00:30:53Well, then, I'm excited to get to know her better.
00:30:57Hold on.
00:30:59She's boxing up the wig for us.
00:31:01Oh, amazing.
00:31:02So, once we're back at the apartment, I just need to start the staging process straight away.
00:31:06Thanks, Cher.
00:31:07And sorry about your mom.
00:31:09Whitney's right.
00:31:10I need to let it go.
00:31:12Wow.
00:31:12Whitney, you are just so impressive.
00:31:16Personally, if Tony had called me a cunt, I would struggle to get past that.
00:31:19But with the power of light, I guess anything is possible, so...
00:31:23What?
00:31:23Oh, I'm...
00:31:24I'm so excited, Whitney, not say.
00:31:26What, would I?
00:31:27That stepped, that shagging rat at the gumption to call me!
00:31:31Come, Cher.
00:31:32Remember the grounding exercise I taught you?
00:31:34Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:31:36We don't need to be...
00:31:38Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
00:31:42no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:31:45No, no, no, no.
00:31:47Oh, God.
00:31:48No.
00:31:48Oh, God.
00:31:49Have some of that.
00:31:50Oh.
00:32:03Oh, crazy to talk.
00:32:11I'm so sorry, you guys.
00:32:15I just assumed Whitney to share the full truth, so.
00:32:21I'm such an idiot.
00:32:22So, no Barbie and Skipper?
00:32:25Oh, no, no, no.
00:32:27I'll get us in.
00:32:29How?
00:32:30Those stickers are like gold dust.
00:32:31It's prints at the roundhouse all over again.
00:32:34Yeah, well, I've many options, but first, I should probably just call my agent.
00:32:41Vanessa?
00:32:42You still with her?
00:32:43Oh, right.
00:32:44Yeah, after that dinner party, yeah, Betty told me all about it.
00:32:49Yeah, no, things are great.
00:32:51Well, there's actually, my new play has been shortlisted for an award, so.
00:32:54Really?
00:32:54Like a big one?
00:32:56Yeah, like the biggest.
00:32:58Actually, I've never even longlisted before, so.
00:33:02Congratulations.
00:33:03Thanks.
00:33:05I have to let me just.
00:33:11Hello?
00:33:11Maggie.
00:33:13I'm sorry, but this graveyard has terrible reception.
00:33:15Vanessa, hi.
00:33:16Um, I'm just wondering if you could help me out.
00:33:18I'm trying to get tickets to this thing tonight.
00:33:20Okay.
00:33:21Yeah, um, it's a drag show, and, um, I don't know if you know anyone who works in that area,
00:33:31or...
00:33:33Sorry, Maggie, I couldn't hear you.
00:33:34There are people nearby grieving loudly.
00:33:36Did you say a drag show?
00:33:38Like a gay thing?
00:33:39Yes, very gay.
00:33:41Rupert could probably help.
00:33:42Rupert.
00:33:43Rupert Everett.
00:33:44He's an old friend.
00:33:45He'll be at the Mandalay Club from six, if you want to go and ask him.
00:33:49He doesn't take calls.
00:33:50Yeah, yeah, I know, I know it well.
00:33:52I'd come with you, but Hilary Mantle snuck a clause into her contract that I had to polish
00:33:56her gravestone once a month after her death.
00:33:58I'll send you the address.
00:33:59Oh, well, thank you so much, Melissa.
00:34:04Done and done.
00:34:06We just need to go and schmooze Rupert Everett, and we'll be all gravy.
00:34:09Rupert Everett?
00:34:10Cool.
00:34:11That is cool.
00:34:13We can go get changed at mind, and then head over to the Mandalay Club.
00:34:16Oh, we actually should go back to our apartment, because we kind of need to get settled, and,
00:34:22like, freshen up.
00:34:23That, that's true.
00:34:25But we could meet you at this peg place later.
00:34:29Right, Maggie?
00:34:30And you don't need us, do you?
00:34:32Of course.
00:34:33I'll have the Rupert.
00:34:38Oh, sorry.
00:34:40All right.
00:34:41All right.
00:34:42Guess who back in the house?
00:34:44Heels quick clacking about.
00:34:45Fine fresh remnants down to 11 under vines.
00:34:48Oh, heavenly gentlemen's ratless down.
00:34:49Cross the board, no doubt.
00:34:50Body like, wow.
00:34:51She about to get in this job.
00:34:53Teddy's so beautiful, but this should be just a male should be criminal.
00:34:56Don't make sense for a bitch.
00:34:57Give me this, sit down.
00:34:58Rock to the side.
00:34:59What is that?
00:34:59Oh, well, hi.
00:35:01I'm Maggie Donovan.
00:35:03Now get your camera phone, because in a minute I'm about to be on.
00:35:06Pick up, black girl.
00:35:07Uh-oh, shit.
00:35:08What up?
00:35:08Yeah, 12, that's the brand.
00:35:10I'm just a clutch across.
00:35:11You can make sure I call her the squirt.
00:35:12Kick, kick, run over, over.
00:35:14Oh, um, okay, thanks.
00:35:16I am all set.
00:35:18Ah, that'll be Maggie.
00:35:20Thank goodness you're here.
00:35:21Oh, here I am.
00:35:22Darling, they've arrived.
00:35:24Ah.
00:35:26You must be Maggie.
00:35:29You know, when Vanessa said she was sending you over, I thought, finally, somebody cares
00:35:36about me.
00:35:38Who?
00:35:40Now, you're a little bit, uh, little, though.
00:35:44I need to get a French maid's uniform altered.
00:35:47Don't start with that.
00:35:48I would exqueeze me, darling.
00:35:50They're trying to inject some glamour into the proceedings.
00:35:53Darling, behave.
00:35:54This is your third assistant this month.
00:35:56What?
00:35:56No, no, no.
00:35:57No, no, sorry.
00:35:58No, no.
00:35:58I'm, I'm, I'm actually a playwright.
00:36:00Oh, yes, darling.
00:36:01That's what they all say.
00:36:02The last one didn't like the costume either.
00:36:03You know, you just can't get the star.
00:36:07No, no.
00:36:08Seriously, no.
00:36:09I'm just here to see if you can help me to get tickets for this thing tonight.
00:36:15You know, it's a teensy little bit early to be asking for favours, darling.
00:36:20But I admire your spunk.
00:36:22Oh.
00:36:22Come on, let's go and get a martini.
00:36:27No.
00:36:27I'm not a bad boss, Mandy.
00:36:30Despite what the various court filings may say, I'm simply a world-renowned actor with
00:36:37a taste for the finer things in life.
00:36:39Is that a crime?
00:36:40Oh.
00:36:46Now, I do ask that my silk items be hand-washed by you in front of me.
00:36:52I love to watch.
00:36:54Look, I am not actually your average assistant.
00:36:58No, I am.
00:36:59I'm so much more.
00:37:00Ah.
00:37:01You're a perineal masseuse.
00:37:03Sure.
00:37:04But I also am just really on top of your schedule.
00:37:07In fact, you happen to have an appearance at PEG tonight, so we better get going.
00:37:11An appearance?
00:37:12At PEG?
00:37:13What's PEG?
00:37:14Oh, it's a really cool gay club.
00:37:16You will be introducing two drag queens at their show.
00:37:18Why the tit would I be doing that?
00:37:19I don't do appearances.
00:37:20I'm Rupert fucking Everett, darling.
00:37:22The Fee is astronomical.
00:37:28Didn't you say so before?
00:37:30Oh.
00:37:31Oh.
00:37:33He's fine.
00:37:34We're good.
00:37:35Oh, see?
00:37:37He's fine.
00:37:39He's fine.
00:37:41He's fine.
00:37:43He's fine.
00:37:45He's fine.
00:37:46He's fine.
00:37:47He's fine.
00:37:47Blood light from the other window breaks.
00:37:50Yes.
00:37:50Rubio, let's go.
00:37:52Oh.
00:37:53Oh.
00:37:53We are here.
00:37:54Oh, my God.
00:37:55Bitch.
00:37:56Hide.
00:37:57Hey.
00:37:59Hey.
00:38:00Wonderful.
00:38:01Is this your deal?
00:38:02Darling, do you have any Adderall?
00:38:05He's kidding.
00:38:06He's kidding, I think.
00:38:07We should just cut him.
00:38:08Oh, my God.
00:38:09There you are.
00:38:10Cutting it a bit fine, babe.
00:38:11Where's the wig?
00:38:13Well.
00:38:14Hello.
00:38:15Hello.
00:38:16Sorry, Tony.
00:38:17Sure, I wouldn't give a chance.
00:38:17She was just being very difficult.
00:38:19That little bitch.
00:38:21I'm sorry.
00:38:21I had to escort Rupert inside.
00:38:22He can't get out here with the crabs.
00:38:24The fucking neck of you, Chef Briar.
00:38:27Should I wait?
00:38:28It'll be fine.
00:38:28Hi.
00:38:29We just have a VIP with us if we could just...
00:38:31Name?
00:38:32So we are not on the list, but I just know that Barbie and Skipper would want a gay icon
00:38:36of this caliber in the audience.
00:38:37Will somebody please give me a fucking upper?
00:38:40Are you joking?
00:38:42It really isn't, but please just be cool.
00:38:43What?
00:38:44Have I told you about coming back here?
00:38:46Daddy needs his uppies.
00:38:48Get him out of here before I call the police.
00:38:49Please?
00:38:50No, I think you are mistaken.
00:38:51This man's been terrorizing us for years.
00:38:53He's the reason that Stab has got complex PTSD.
00:38:56You're in violation of our ten restraining orders.
00:38:59You utter fuckhead.
00:39:00Co-dama.
00:39:01I repeat, co-dama at the front door.
00:39:04Co-dama?
00:39:05Oh my god.
00:39:05You set my fucking wig on fire!
00:39:08Yeah!
00:39:08And I'll do it again!
00:39:09Because no one calls shit!
00:39:11Slay in a punch!
00:39:12And gets away with it!
00:39:14Why'd you tell her that, you villain?
00:39:15This is why everybody hates straight people!
00:39:20Straight-ish!
00:39:21She's not coming in.
00:39:22No shit.
00:39:23Fuck off, babes!
00:39:24And stay fucked off!
00:39:25How embarrassing!
00:39:28Stay around here, darling!
00:39:29Get the fire to us!
00:39:31Don't be me!
00:39:31Brian?
00:39:32Oh my god!
00:39:33Brian!
00:39:34Oh my god!
00:39:34You had to help us get in!
00:39:41We are too old for this, Maggie.
00:39:44Today was insane, but this is not who I am anymore.
00:39:48I promise.
00:39:49I have changed.
00:39:50You will see.
00:39:50I will show you.
00:39:53I think I can hope.
00:39:56What?
00:39:58Well, I didn't want to say anything, but I thought, you know, maybe we need a Plan
00:40:04C.
00:40:05So I reached out to my online community, and the universe provided me with a DM from
00:40:11a guy whose mom owns this whole club.
00:40:15Look, there is no way that is some weirdo in his basement looking for attention.
00:40:18No, I think that's him now!
00:40:19Eddie!
00:40:22Eddie!
00:40:23Eddie!
00:40:24Eddie!
00:40:26You!
00:40:26You!
00:40:27You!
00:40:28It's really you!
00:40:30I've been looking for you everywhere!
00:40:32I mean, not physically, but on Instagram!
00:40:34Oh my god!
00:40:36Physically!
00:40:37Wait, you know each other?
00:40:41I saw something like this in your soul contract, remember?
00:40:45A cherished old friend would return to your life.
00:40:49Yeah, I had no idea it would be Crent.
00:40:52Listen, can you start Monday?
00:40:54What?
00:40:54Oh, oh my god!
00:40:55Look at me getting ahead of myself!
00:40:57I'm just so excited about this good luck!
00:40:59It's for your day!
00:41:00It is!
00:41:01It is!
00:41:02I love that!
00:41:04I love you!
00:41:05Oh, sorry, you just did a bump.
00:41:07Anyway, mommy just bought Walthamstow and gave me a building, so I'm opening a bar,
00:41:12and you get to manage it!
00:41:13Eddie!
00:41:15Oh my goddess!
00:41:16Sorry!
00:41:18Finding Eddie a job was our next step!
00:41:21Oh, amazing!
00:41:22Let's go inside and talk business!
00:41:25Eddie!
00:41:26This is such a blessing from the universe!
00:41:34Okay!
00:41:35Okay!
00:41:36Yeah!
00:41:37Sure!
00:41:38I knew you'd say yes!
00:41:39Okay, come with me!
00:41:40Oh, hey guys!
00:41:41This is Eddie!
00:41:42My working class friend!
00:41:44Come on!
00:41:46You two mad!
00:42:08Hello?
00:42:08Hey Maggie!
00:42:10Sorry!
00:42:10It's uh...
00:42:11This isn't Will, is it?
00:42:12I blocked you years ago!
00:42:13Oh!
00:42:14Well, I got a new number!
00:42:15Look, don't hang up!
00:42:16It's about Whitney!
00:42:18What about her?
00:42:19Eddie sent me a few texts when she first got to LA, and then went completely AWOL!
00:42:24Not a peep since then, and now, she reappears with this spiritual guru slash influencer!
00:42:31Something feels off!
00:42:33Okay, well, you're a nerd!
00:42:36Do some research!
00:42:38Dig up some dirt!
00:42:38Or something!
00:42:39I can do that!
00:42:40Piss off, princess!
00:42:42We're having a party!
00:42:47Hm?
00:42:48Suit yourself, Sultis!
00:42:50Ah!
00:42:51Ah!
00:42:54Ah!
00:42:55Ah!
00:42:56Ah!
00:42:58Ah!
00:42:59Ah!
00:42:59Ah!
00:43:00Ah!
00:43:01Ah!
00:43:08Ah!
00:43:09Ah!
00:43:11Ah!
00:43:13Ah!
00:43:14Ah!
00:43:14Ah!
00:43:15Ah!
00:43:20Ah!
00:43:21Ah!
00:43:22Ah!
00:43:25Ah!
00:43:26Ah!
00:43:28Ah!
00:43:28Ah!
00:43:28Ah!
00:43:29Ah!
00:43:30Ah!
00:43:30Ah!
00:43:31Ah!
00:43:32Ah!
00:43:33Ah!
00:43:33Ah!
00:43:33Ah!
00:43:35Ah!
00:43:38Ah!
00:43:39Ah!
00:43:39Ah!
00:43:43Hey, sorry, I'm just mid-spin.
00:43:44Oh, Maggie, I don't like you using that thing.
00:43:47That's what killed Mr. Big.
00:43:48Yeah, good point. I'll call it a day.
00:43:52So, hard things with Eddie.
00:43:55Is she enjoying her new job?
00:43:57Do you think I made the bar too low?
00:44:01I assumed I'd be incredible at interior design
00:44:03because of my breeding.
00:44:04It was actually kind of hard.
00:44:08Eddie!
00:44:09Yes, Cren?
00:44:09Time Out magazine is coming tonight
00:44:11and it's like you don't even care
00:44:12if they think my bar is enchanting.
00:44:14Look, I know this might come as a surprise to you.
00:44:17I've got other more important things
00:44:18to be directing my mental energy to right now.
00:44:21Like what?
00:44:21Like my own inner peace
00:44:23and how to protect it
00:44:24when different energies come into my soul space.
00:44:27And can old energies merge with new energies
00:44:28or should I just...
00:44:29I went to a bar in Milan
00:44:30where none of the staff wore shoes.
00:44:32Maybe that's the answer.
00:44:35Well, I think she's loving it, yeah.
00:44:37I haven't actually seen her since the drag show,
00:44:39but I've just...
00:44:41I've just been really busy with my Depop.
00:44:44I've found a lot of old Jane Norman tops
00:44:47and the kids are going well for them, so...
00:44:49Will you see her soon, yeah?
00:44:50Oh, sure.
00:44:51Yeah, I just...
00:44:53I just want to let her settle in.
00:44:54I just don't seem like a crazy stalker.
00:45:02You know, Krent,
00:45:03Whitney always says that listening
00:45:04is more powerful than talking.
00:45:05Is that aimed at me?
00:45:07I'm a fantastic listener.
00:45:09Look!
00:45:16Fine.
00:45:19Whitney thinks I should cut out...
00:45:23meat.
00:45:25And I get it,
00:45:26because meat does kind of cause chaos.
00:45:29But I think I'll really, really miss it.
00:45:37You can still talk.
00:45:38Oh, okay.
00:45:40Well, um...
00:45:41I mean, did Whitney ever give meat a chance?
00:45:43Like, did she ever have a Nando's?
00:45:46Uh...
00:45:47Because chicken is not really meat, right?
00:45:49Like, a bird is more of a plant than an animal,
00:45:53so I think you have as much meat as you can
00:45:55while Whitney's away,
00:45:56and then if it shuffles your chakras,
00:45:58you know you have to give it up for good.
00:46:01Right, listening time's over.
00:46:04Are you sure you have to take the rest of the day off?
00:46:05Very sure.
00:46:07But from anything else,
00:46:08it's basic employment law.
00:46:09Yes, but this is my chance to show Mother
00:46:11that I have what it takes
00:46:12to be a nightlife tycoon
00:46:14slash corporate landlord.
00:46:15I've managed to set this place up
00:46:17so it actually functions,
00:46:18which is all you need to be mentioned
00:46:20in a listicle about hinge date venues.
00:46:22Yes, I know, but Betty...
00:46:24Also, isn't the journalist
00:46:25literally your brother's mate?
00:46:26You of all people should know
00:46:27how nepotism works.
00:46:28Yes, but I want a big, splashy rave.
00:46:31You think I'll get a big, splashy rave?
00:46:33I'm not sure what they'd rave about.
00:46:35This place lacks any real identity.
00:46:39What do you mean?
00:46:40I mean, it's called Lodge by Kay.
00:46:41Who?
00:46:42But there is nothing lodgy about it.
00:46:50Can I bring your phone?
00:46:52Can I bring your phone?
00:46:53Just make sure you put yourself first.
00:46:56I know Betty is very important to you,
00:46:58but you've come a long way in the last year,
00:47:00and I don't want you to get you...
00:47:01I have to go.
00:47:07How dare you hang up on you, Mum?
00:47:09I didn't hang up on you, Mum.
00:47:10The conversation was over.
00:47:14Look, I need a shower.
00:47:15Eddie invited me over.
00:47:19I don't know.
00:47:19I'm probably some disgusting hippie warehouse
00:47:21full of mice and brats and shit.
00:47:23Yeah.
00:47:24A friend of Whitney's lent us the place.
00:47:26He's doing a walk across India
00:47:28to raise awareness for people who raise awareness.
00:47:30So you're not paying anything?
00:47:31I don't know.
00:47:32Whitney looks after our finances.
00:47:34Oh.
00:47:35Speaking of my girl,
00:47:37Whitney, where's she at?
00:47:38She's so excited to get to know her better.
00:47:41She's out of town.
00:47:42We'll be back tomorrow.
00:47:42What?
00:47:43Oh, that's such a shame.
00:47:45It is, yeah.
00:47:47Just because Thursday's my cell reset day,
00:47:49which Whitney usually supports me through.
00:47:51But I thought maybe you could help instead.
00:47:57Oh.
00:47:58Okay, sure.
00:47:58Yeah.
00:47:59I mean, I've never done a soul recycling before, but I...
00:48:04Maggie, this is my spiritual practice.
00:48:05Don't take the piss.
00:48:07No, no, no.
00:48:07I'm not.
00:48:07I'm really not.
00:48:09Okay.
00:48:10I was going to start with a cleansing sound bath.
00:48:12Amazing.
00:48:12I would love to bathe sound.
00:48:14I really...
00:48:15If you're tired, it won't work.
00:48:17You have to focus.
00:48:18No.
00:48:19No, no, I'm not.
00:48:19That was just, like, nervous excitement.
00:48:22Like, I think, like, when a dog yawns.
00:48:25But I really want to know more about it.
00:48:27Like, everything you've learned from Whitney,
00:48:30because it's obviously helped you a lot,
00:48:32and I think that's really great.
00:48:35Okay, because I need this after a week of full-time Krent.
00:48:38Oh, right.
00:48:39Krent is your boss now.
00:48:40In name only.
00:48:41He knows who's really in charge.
00:48:42He does whatever I say.
00:48:49I've got a shitload of logs here
00:48:51for a Krent of the Goldman Sachs.
00:48:55Okay.
00:48:58Sorry.
00:49:05Let your eyelids slide generously closed
00:49:09over your eyeballs
00:49:10and wait for the sound I make
00:49:13to start moving through your root chakra.
00:49:23Is it, like, one of those sounds
00:49:24that only animals can hear?
00:49:26I'm just warming it up.
00:49:32Can I try?
00:49:42Oh, my God.
00:49:45Is this the thing I'm good at?
00:49:47Wow, legs.
00:49:48Whitney always says the ball responds best
00:49:50to those with true inner serenity.
00:49:53I do feel super serene.
00:49:55Almost...
00:49:58Overwhelmingly, so.
00:49:58It's almost like I've been...
00:50:09You're so soothing.
00:50:12Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
00:50:14Wow, Maggie.
00:50:15Are you chanting?
00:50:17Yeah, I learned it in primary school.
00:50:19It's really common in Ireland.
00:50:21I'm wanting, I'm wanting, I'm bongong.
00:50:30Salamandale.
00:50:32Ah!
00:50:32Jesus, what was that?
00:50:33A landline, Maggie.
00:50:35Oh, hey.
00:50:36Oh.
00:50:37Oh.
00:50:41Hello?
00:50:43Wait, Mia, slow down.
00:50:45Jesus!
00:50:46Okay, I'm on my way. Just stay calm.
00:50:49It's calm. I'm calm.
00:50:54Grant's done something even dumber than I thought him capable of.
00:50:57I have to go down there.
00:50:58Oh, no.
00:51:00I totally understand. We can hang out another time.
00:51:03Actually, could you come with me?
00:51:05I really need to stay grounded.
00:51:07It would be great if you could be my soul anchor,
00:51:10seeing as you're just so mellow today.
00:51:12Absolutely.
00:51:17Oh, it's too hot.
00:51:20Okay, guys, the log piles still just look like log piles.
00:51:24Pooey, you've ruined the surprise.
00:51:27Oh, my God.
00:51:28You felt the part with tiny soreness.
00:51:31Okay, I'm just...
00:51:33I'm just...
00:51:34Take a deep breath and think of...
00:51:37Bedtime.
00:51:39Grant, can you please explain yourself in the least infuriating way possible?
00:51:43When you're a business owner, you have to take risks and be bold.
00:51:47That's according to Jamie Lang's podcast.
00:51:49So I thought, how can I ensure that we get a rave review?
00:51:52Stay home.
00:51:52And then it came to me.
00:51:54Lodge by K.
00:51:55Lodge.
00:51:56Ski lodge.
00:51:58Alpine luxury.
00:51:59Now, what do you think when you think alpine luxury?
00:52:03Sounders.
00:52:04So you get a drink and maybe some olives,
00:52:06and then you take those olives into the little hot cupboard.
00:52:09Isn't that so chic?
00:52:10All right, first things first.
00:52:13Hey, what are you doing?
00:52:14Let's turn off all my saunas.
00:52:15Well, that's very much the idea.
00:52:18Well, you just leave and pretend we never saw this.
00:52:21Get rid of the saunas.
00:52:22My saunas?
00:52:23No.
00:52:24This bar cannot house five saunas.
00:52:26The heat will get us shut down.
00:52:28Get rid of them.
00:52:28I love them.
00:52:29Get rid of the saunas, or I quit.
00:52:36Guys, I'm sorry for the everything.
00:52:39It will all get sorted.
00:52:40Just please don't leave.
00:52:41John, are you happy?
00:52:43They're coming to take them away tomorrow.
00:52:45Tomorrow?
00:52:45So after timeout comes.
00:52:48Call your mate and tell him to come another night.
00:52:50Oh, they're not coming.
00:52:51They texted Elliot to say they can't make it.
00:52:53They're sending someone new.
00:52:55A man called TJ.
00:52:57According to his Instagram,
00:52:58he loves social housing and hates the elite,
00:53:02whoever they are.
00:53:03Maybe a band?
00:53:04Thank you, Krent.
00:53:05That will be all.
00:53:09Okay.
00:53:10Come on, let me just...
00:53:14Oh, why is this still so hot?
00:53:16Apparently they take hours to cool down.
00:53:18Between that and the fact that this place
00:53:19now has the carbon footprint of an airport,
00:53:21he has really out-Krented himself.
00:53:22We need to shift these saunas.
00:53:24What happened to the mans with vans?
00:53:26They used to be everywhere.
00:53:27Oh.
00:53:28Maybe I can find one on Tinder.
00:53:30I just...
00:53:31Are you okay?
00:53:33Yeah.
00:53:34So, Lee, I think, um...
00:53:35I think the sound bath just really, like,
00:53:36relax my muscles, you know.
00:53:38Or maybe Jay knows someone.
00:53:40Survivalists have vans, right?
00:53:42Yeah, you have to take this.
00:53:44Aw, thanks, Max.
00:53:46You're really helping me out today.
00:53:49Maybe I can't handle a week without Whitney.
00:54:03I found something.
00:54:04I've been deep in the wayback machine all day.
00:54:07And boy, my wrists are tired.
00:54:09How did you know I was here?
00:54:14Did I post this?
00:54:15Yeah.
00:54:16What the fuck?
00:54:19Stressy bestie.
00:54:20So, Whitney, she hasn't always been this hippie guru.
00:54:23No, this is her.
00:54:24Literally three years ago,
00:54:26she was a slime influencer.
00:54:27And she...
00:54:29God, it's hot in here.
00:54:31She's got an internet history as long as my extendable duster.
00:54:33I mean, we need to tell Eddie what we found here.
00:54:36Right.
00:54:37Yes.
00:54:39Not today.
00:54:40Today, I am an anchor.
00:54:42But she needs to know who she's going into business with.
00:54:46I'm worried that Eddie has given Whitney money.
00:54:48We need to sit her down right now.
00:54:50Do you still know that drug dealer with the stolen lorry?
00:54:52Oh, get in here.
00:54:53What?
00:54:53She'll be with you shortly.
00:54:55Just come on.
00:54:57Was his name Chins?
00:54:58He only sold Xanax and Poppers.
00:55:00I think Chins found God's.
00:55:03Hey!
00:55:04Let's put some music on in here.
00:55:05Come on, let's pop up the jam.
00:55:07Come on!
00:55:08Let's dance!
00:55:23Maggie?
00:55:25Maggie?
00:55:26Maggie?
00:55:28All right.
00:55:29Sorry, I was just checking the floor.
00:55:31Um, for heat damage.
00:55:33But, um, none of this, um, none of this is on fire.
00:55:38So.
00:55:39Can someone help?
00:55:41There are two more of these in the Abbey Lee.
00:55:42Well, what's in there?
00:55:43Ice.
00:55:44I got loads of ice.
00:55:46I thought we could make ice sculptures.
00:55:48I mean, how hard could it be?
00:55:49Edward Scissorhands did it and he was literally part scissor.
00:55:52But it's boiling hot in here.
00:55:54So we get air corn.
00:55:55I mean, fuck the planet, right?
00:55:56No, but, Kren, the he coming off of these things will melt.
00:55:59I am off!
00:56:00Oh, I know.
00:56:01I forgot something.
00:56:01What are you doing here?
00:56:03She.
00:56:04She brought me here and then she locked me in there.
00:56:07He.
00:56:08He is lying.
00:56:09He begged me to get in there.
00:56:11Please don't make me go in the hot place again, mummy.
00:56:13He was being crazy.
00:56:14And I knew that you wanted to be a calm, woo-woo, hippie lady.
00:56:19Woo-woo.
00:56:19This is my healing journey.
00:56:21No, I didn't mean that.
00:56:22I knew you were full of shit.
00:56:23No, Eddie, I would never.
00:56:25Two days about Whitney and this is what happened.
00:56:26Just get out.
00:56:28Both of you, get the fuck out of my bar.
00:56:32Get the fuck out of Kren's bar.
00:56:40Whitney.
00:56:41So.
00:56:42Go.
00:56:43What do we do now?
00:56:47I cannot believe it wasn't the fact that I'm sedated that fucked things up.
00:56:51It was just you.
00:56:52I have a fire in my mouth.
00:56:53It's burning me.
00:56:56Everyone keeps asking me what to do.
00:57:00It's like, how should I know?
00:57:02You know, just because I'm the owner of the bar and the only person who stands to benefit
00:57:08financially from its success, I should know what I'm doing is the fair.
00:57:12Hey.
00:57:13Before I lost my vision, I remember thinking that the sauna was really nice, the seat was
00:57:18comfortable, and I love the man in the red cloak who showed me the passage to Hades.
00:57:22Thanks, Matt.
00:57:23Maggie, you're a good friend.
00:57:25You're trying.
00:57:27What else can you do?
00:57:30Oh, okay.
00:57:32If no one minds, I'm going to take myself to the nearest hospital.
00:57:38Listen, we can turn your stupid fucking saunas into little private rooms, pretend it's all
00:57:42on purpose.
00:57:43If we can make the whole place look like a proper ski cranks, we're going to go back in
00:57:48there, and we're going to turn your stupid mistake into a beautiful triumph.
00:57:51Ready?
00:57:52What are you doing?
00:57:55Is that some kind of street code?
00:57:57Car.
00:57:59What are you doing?
00:58:03I'm your kidder.
00:58:06Please?
00:58:06Out and sick.
00:58:07Swallow my knees.
00:58:09I stayin' knees.
00:58:10I stayin' kidder.
00:58:13Do it.
00:58:14Do it.
00:58:15See how they guard my buss up.
00:58:16I see footage, I stay naughty, I see footage
00:58:19I see footage, I see naughty, I see footage
00:58:22I see, I see everybody's love
00:58:25Where you think you're going and going, no
00:58:27A saddle up, handle that, you don't have a heart
00:58:30I got it, I got it, I got it
00:58:36Like I told you, don't trust me, what's up with it?
00:58:39I stay naughty, simulation over now with a camera here
00:58:42It's a spot, a man, I'm out of shit
00:58:43I stay naughty, I'm out of shit
00:58:45I'm out of shit, I'm out of shit
00:58:47Little tiger, boy soldier, she's a champion
00:58:53Listen, it looks worse than it is
00:58:57Anyone who's ever had their period in a white tankini
00:59:00Knows how to clean up a blood stain, so...
00:59:04Oh, dope, you came!
00:59:09I'll step on your mullet, it looks not enough
00:59:11I saved you a seat, Coswell's massive
00:59:13And don't worry, ladies and gentlemen
00:59:19This... is impressive
00:59:21God...
00:59:24Seriously...
00:59:27It actually looks so good
00:59:32Eddie!
00:59:33O.M.G.
00:59:34The last 90 minutes have literally been the hardest of my life
00:59:37I had to learn things and then answer questions and then Maggie...
00:59:40Her...
00:59:41Her pride
00:59:43By admitting she wasn't so great with a power tool
00:59:47What?
00:59:48Right, Krant?
00:59:48It was so funny
00:59:52We did so many laughs
00:59:55I've really thought I'd come back to somehow even more chaos
00:59:59But...
01:00:00...you...
01:00:02You fixed it
01:00:04Thank you, Eddie
01:00:06The time-out man is going to be here any minute
01:00:08Do my cellar pets look fresh?
01:00:10get Eddie a jumper
01:00:12and I'm just going to pee.
01:01:05Do you think he likes my tree?
01:01:08I think I should talk to him.
01:01:10You have to trust me on this one.
01:01:12That man will not like you.
01:01:15Boyler, just down there, bro.
01:01:18What?
01:01:19I don't have a cone switch.
01:01:21No, no, no, no.
01:01:23Get it.
01:01:25I'm going to touch her, I swear.
01:01:27Oh God, they're going to find a text I sent to my ex-girlfriend.
01:01:30Maggie, Maggie.
01:01:31It's okay, don't panic.
01:01:32I think I can get Elton to sing Candle at her fume.
01:01:34No, this can't be.
01:01:35You can't do this to me.
01:01:36Maggie, Maggie.
01:01:38Oh, Mummy, turn off the big light.
01:01:52And that is as far as we've got.
01:01:58We're still workshopping it, obviously,
01:01:59but I think it's going to be ready for the public really soon.
01:02:04What?
01:02:04Our Scandi Noir murder mystery immersive experience is literally the theme of the bar.
01:02:12Did you guys not warn him?
01:02:15We thought it would be fun if he felt real fear.
01:02:19Oh, they forgot to give you your detective costume.
01:02:22You're a detective.
01:02:23No, he's still in character.
01:02:24Eddie, why are you?
01:02:24And he'll give away the ending if we let him.
01:02:28This is his baby.
01:02:28He loved the killing.
01:02:30Yo, I've been to more escape rooms and punch drunk shows than I'd like to admit,
01:02:34but this, this was legit.
01:02:37Yeah, I fucking love it.
01:02:40You do?
01:02:41Yeah.
01:02:42Because he went to shit, that was boring, but the horribly realistic dead body, yeah.
01:02:47That was fucking cool.
01:02:49I still feel kind of sick, but time out would love this.
01:02:53When's it, when's it launch?
01:02:55Let's let Maggie clean up, and Kren will tell you all about it.
01:02:58Yeah, okay.
01:03:00Okay.
01:03:02I can't actually tell you much, because I don't really understand that myself.
01:03:05Let's wait.
01:03:09Kren's giving us a massive casting budget.
01:03:11Where do you find actors?
01:03:12Gumtree?
01:03:13Leave it with me.
01:03:20Genuinely, thanks for today.
01:03:22Oiled Willisai, you're a great soul anchor.
01:03:29I thought you wouldn't be able to accept me.
01:03:32As I am.
01:03:34Now.
01:03:35What?
01:03:36I'd accept you even if you were a Disney adult.
01:03:40Thanks.
01:03:43Whitney was concerned that your chaos would bring me down again, like it did last year.
01:03:48But you've changed.
01:03:50I can really see that.
01:03:53Will, on the other hand.
01:03:55Wait, what did Will do?
01:03:56He basically declared his love for me, after the abortion.
01:04:00Whitney helped me see how toxic that was.
01:04:02She's helped me so much.
01:04:06It's like, before I met her, I'd been holding my breath.
01:04:15Like, since Dad died.
01:04:17And now, I'm breathing again.
01:04:28I want to learn from Whitney.
01:04:31Really.
01:04:33Look, maybe she could help with my scalp thing.
01:04:37Me and Whitney are moving to Devon.
01:04:39We're starting an intentional community down there.
01:04:42That's where she's been this week.
01:04:46Wow.
01:04:49Well, um, I have always wanted to spend more time on trains, so you'll make it work.
01:04:58Maybe tomorrow we can have a real day off together.
01:05:00Eddie?
01:05:01I tried calling you.
01:05:02Are you okay?
01:05:03Hey.
01:05:04My curly.
01:05:05Oh.
01:05:06Maggie's here.
01:05:07She really helped me.
01:05:09There was this whole Krent-related emergency.
01:05:12Hey, wouldn't it?
01:05:13Ah.
01:05:14Maggie really wants to learn from you, Whit.
01:05:16She responded so well to your techniques today.
01:05:19If that's okay with you?
01:05:22Of course.
01:05:24Anyone with an honest heart is a welcome in my world.
01:05:30You look stunning.
01:05:31Do you have a facial or something?
01:05:33I wasn't on vacation, Eddie.
01:05:36I was securing our future.
01:05:38Of course.
01:05:39I'm so sorry.
01:05:40You worked so hard for us.
01:05:44I guess the ocean just did wonders for my inner light.
01:05:49Yeah.
01:05:50Wow.
01:05:51Well, that light certainly is blindingly white.
01:05:57Yeah.
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