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Watch the full epic, magical, and highly satisfying journey of SHE'S NOT HOMELESS SHE'S HEALER GODDESS.

📖 Synopsis: Kicked out and treated like a filthy beggar by her arrogant family, she wanders the streets disguised as a homeless woman. When the nation's greatest hero falls terminally ill and top doctors give up, the "beggar" steps in. Shedding her disguise, she reveals herself as the legendary Healer Goddess, curing the hero and bringing the elites to their knees in awe.
🎭 Genre: Hidden Identity, Fantasy Medical, Face Slapping.

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Transcript
00:00:02Healer goddess, hear my plea.
00:00:05Please save my child.
00:00:23Rod of a sepulis.
00:00:43Rejuvening.
00:00:51Praise! She is the healer goddess!
00:00:55No, please. Don't call me that.
00:00:58What?
00:00:59I'm just glad I could help.
00:01:05Here you go, miss.
00:01:09Why be weighed down by a throne when I can live amongst the common people and help those the most
00:01:13in need?
00:01:26You must be rushing off to go find your jewels, because only a sackless coward would hit a puppy and
00:01:31run!
00:01:34Aw, it's okay, little guy. I'll fix you right up.
00:01:44Right rewrites the wrong.
00:01:49We're juvenile.
00:01:54See? Good is the day you can kick him out of your mother's womb.
00:01:59Come on, Cleo! Let's go!
00:02:13Hey, hey, hey, hey!
00:02:17Please. My brother's been in a coma the last two years.
00:02:21We have no idea what the illness is. If anyone can help cure him, we will pay you handsomely.
00:02:26The Elizander Armstrong! His military family basically owns the entire global stock market!
00:02:32He's so hot! Does he come with the money?
00:02:35Yes. He'll even marry you if you can cure him.
00:02:38Money. Fame. Power. It's all yours.
00:02:46Are we still moving forward, Miss Trixie?
00:02:48Yes. Give the presidential contract to Marissa.
00:02:52Oh, I have another call coming in.
00:02:56Grandma!
00:02:56I'm dying! Save me, Trixie!
00:03:00Grandma?
00:03:02Grandma.
00:03:03When are you getting married? I'm already a hundred years old.
00:03:07I'm gonna keep you healthy forever, Grandma.
00:03:09And Butch is still on deployment, so that's why I haven't been married yet.
00:03:16Oh, but why marry a vegetable when I can bang a younger stud like you?
00:03:22We're talking about my brother's life. I don't have time for jokes.
00:03:27No!
00:03:36Please go feed your dog, Miss. Don't let it starve like you.
00:03:40Oh, kind stranger. Let me repay you by granting you a wish.
00:03:44Grant me a wish? That you can barely feed yourself.
00:03:47The downfall of humanity. It all starts with the loss of faith.
00:03:51What? Oh, geez, this is giving me a migraine.
00:03:55Are you telling me to pray to God because we've been doing that?
00:03:58I'm telling you to have some faith in me.
00:04:01Okay, uh, I wish for you to cure my brother's illness.
00:04:06Can you do that?
00:04:07I can topple mountains and make a king out of a frog if I wanted to.
00:04:11Cleo, stay right here for a second.
00:04:14Don't go too far, Cleo.
00:04:18Hold still.
00:04:25What? My migraine's gone.
00:04:28Okay, then let's go.
00:04:29If you can cure my brother, he'll even marry you.
00:04:32Come on. Come on.
00:04:33Oh!
00:04:47How is he?
00:04:48What is the diagnosis?
00:04:50Remember, you will not marry him unless you cure him.
00:04:53I'm sorry. I don't know what this is.
00:04:55Aren't you the queen of medicine?
00:04:57You're supposed to be one of the best.
00:04:59Don't worry, General.
00:05:00I'm the angel herbalist and I have mastered all healing methods of the East.
00:05:05I can detect what condition your son has with just one needle.
00:05:26I have no clue what this is.
00:05:30Oh, it looks like the angel herbalist doesn't live up to her name after all.
00:05:35That's why we saved the best for last.
00:05:38Me, the witch doctor.
00:05:39I'll save your son, Lysander.
00:05:52He's not budging. There's no movement.
00:05:54Truly, I have saved thousands of patients all over the world, but I don't know what this is.
00:06:01Lord, I've scoured the earth for the best doctors.
00:06:04They've tried all these methods and they've all failed.
00:06:06If we can't save him, there's only one person who can.
00:06:12Who?
00:06:16The goddess of healing.
00:06:19Wait a second.
00:06:21You're not talking about the legendary goddess healing.
00:06:23That's correct.
00:06:24Her right rewrites the rond and her left leaves the bereft.
00:06:30That's her motto.
00:06:31It's what makes her a sage amongst mortals.
00:06:34We are nothing compared to her.
00:06:36She is eccentric and elusive.
00:06:40No one has ever seen her before.
00:06:41If this legendary healer is the only one that can truly save my son,
00:06:46I don't care if I go bankrupt.
00:06:48I will find her.
00:06:49James, come put out a bounty to the entire world.
00:06:54Whoever finds the goddess healer will give her five million dollars.
00:06:59There's no need.
00:07:14I'll save your son.
00:07:17Who the hell is she?
00:07:18Dad, she says she can cure Lysander.
00:07:20She's gonna save your brother?
00:07:21Brother, don't be ridiculous.
00:07:23How can this shit-stained hobo cure your brother?
00:07:27Exactly.
00:07:28God, the unemployed are getting crazier and crazier.
00:07:31She's trying to scam her way into marrying the rich.
00:07:34Ew!
00:07:35She even brought a filthy dog with her.
00:07:38I bet it has fleas.
00:07:39That flea-infested dirty thing is your companion.
00:07:44Don't try to steal Lysander Armstrong from us.
00:07:50Don't touch him.
00:07:54They say don't judge a book by its cover.
00:07:56But I can see from all your faces that you've failed.
00:07:59So step aside.
00:08:01I'll take it from here.
00:08:03Could you hold this?
00:08:04Ho, ho, ho, ho.
00:08:05You're not gonna touch my son.
00:08:07I'm the richest tycoon in this country and a former general.
00:08:11I know a gold-digging whore when I see one.
00:08:14I bet she's only here because giving blowjobs on the street corners wasn't paying enough cash.
00:08:19Who knows what an unskilled poor girl like her would do for some.
00:08:24A skinny-ass beggar trying to take advantage of Lysander Armstrong when he's unconscious?
00:08:31Ew!
00:08:32Disgusting.
00:08:33Go back to being a prostitute.
00:08:35Security!
00:08:35Get this STD-infested peasant out of here now.
00:08:39Let's go.
00:08:40If you throw me out, you're tossing away your son's last chance at life.
00:08:47Sir, we are at our wit's end trying to find a cure for Master Lysander and to no avail.
00:08:52Maybe we should give her a try?
00:08:55You can always deal with her later if she turns out to be a fraud.
00:08:58Alright, I'll give you a shot.
00:09:01But I warn you, if you fail, I'll have your and your dog's head mounted on my wall!
00:09:07Is that any way to ask for help?
00:09:10You'd be blessed to have me.
00:09:12And I'm only here to repay your younger son's kindness.
00:09:15But since I'm not welcome here, I'll leave.
00:09:20Devon, come find me when you have a different wish.
00:09:22No, Miss Trixie.
00:09:24My brother is a hero to me.
00:09:26I can't lose him.
00:09:28Well, if he's a hero to you, then that means he must be a good person.
00:09:34My brother is a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack.
00:09:39Also, he's great with puppies.
00:09:40He'd make a great husband.
00:09:44Who says I want to marry him?
00:09:45As if the number one hottest 30 under 30 would even dream of marrying a penniless bum like you.
00:09:52Only a lunatic would be crazy enough to marry her.
00:09:55I mean, look at her.
00:09:56Even if she cleaned herself up, you couldn't find an ounce of femininity on her.
00:10:01Only those cut from the lowest ranks were bigger over such trivial matters.
00:10:06Continue wasting your time.
00:10:08But I'm saving this patient.
00:10:20Oh, okay!
00:10:23What's happening?
00:10:24What are we doing?
00:10:35Oh!
00:10:36What the hell are you doing?
00:10:39I knew she was a perv!
00:10:41She's definitely trying to steal Lysander from us.
00:10:44Do you all not know that Sweat can tell you everything that's medically wrong with a patient?
00:10:47Are you insane?
00:10:48Security, smash her face in for licking my son!
00:10:52He's born with congenital heart disease, has a peanut allergy, and the condition he has is called endogenic cryomorphy.
00:10:59Yeah, right!
00:11:01I mean, no way you got all that just from licking him!
00:11:04Oh, okay.
00:11:05I've studied every disease known to man, right?
00:11:07I even have the badge of universal medicine right here.
00:11:11And I've never heard of endo-cryo...
00:11:15What?
00:11:16What?
00:11:17Hmm.
00:11:18This?
00:11:25Is worth nothing when I have the real thing right here.
00:11:28What?
00:11:29What?
00:11:30So you think that this crummy walking stick of yours is what, THE rod of a sepulius?
00:11:36Why don't you go back to the homeless asylum where you came from if you're going to be this delusional?
00:11:41I agree.
00:11:42I mean, even if she does solve this medical mystery, what is the point of doctors who have studied for
00:11:48years?
00:11:49We are all certified.
00:11:51But Lysander does have congenital heart disease.
00:11:54She's right about everything.
00:11:58Yeah, but if she just throws out a bunch of fake diagnoses, one of them is bound to be right.
00:12:03And again, there is no such thing as endo-cryo-what-what!
00:12:07Endogenic cryomorphie.
00:12:08Oh.
00:12:09And of course none of you have heard of it.
00:12:11Because I just discovered it.
00:12:13This condition only affects those with both CHD and a peanut allergy.
00:12:17The chances are a billion to one.
00:12:19A hundred times rarer than winning the lottery.
00:12:22But lucky for you all, you've hit the jackpot by finding me.
00:12:27What a bunch of baloney.
00:12:28I mean, you wouldn't be homeless if you were actually any good.
00:12:33Precisely.
00:12:34You are just a scamming prostitute.
00:12:36You don't compare to meet us who actually studied real medicine.
00:12:41I bet you were too poor to go to real medical school.
00:12:45Oh, so she went to the stripper circus instead.
00:12:49And now she's here putting on this clown show coming up with fake diseases,
00:12:53which mean nothing if you can't wake him up.
00:12:57Is that supposed to be a challenge?
00:12:59Oh my God.
00:13:01If you three incompetent doormats want to show me up,
00:13:04I think you all should grow parts of your brain back.
00:13:07Which, by the way, that condition is called an encephaly.
00:13:11What is that supposed to mean?
00:13:13It means you're being schooled by me.
00:13:15And I'm about to walk all over your medical licensees.
00:13:19Then let's have a bet.
00:13:21If you can't heal him, we'll break your hands.
00:13:26And then you can't pretend to have healing hands anymore.
00:13:32These hands have saved more lives than all three of you combined.
00:13:37You're that desperate to get rid of your competition, huh?
00:13:40Miss Trixie, don't risk your hands for them.
00:13:43There's too many lives at stake.
00:13:47Don't worry. I got this.
00:13:52It's a deal.
00:13:53I'll save Lysander Armstrong.
00:13:55No one is dying on my watch.
00:14:04Lysander Armstrong has been in a vegetative state for two years.
00:14:11Are you stopping me because you're scared I'd actually succeed?
00:14:15Homeless or not, if you save my son, I'll give you everything.
00:14:27I'll even have Lysander, my heir, marry you.
00:14:30I'm not doing this for the money or for a wealthy husband.
00:14:33I just believe in helping good people and doing the right thing.
00:14:38Prepare a jacuzzi set at exactly 113 degrees Fahrenheit.
00:14:41Wait, wait, wait. What for?
00:14:43Don't listen to her.
00:14:45She probably stinks so bad that she just wants a bath to wash the homeless stench off of her.
00:14:50Firstly, this is called greatness.
00:14:53Secondly, even if you drown yourself in plastic surgery, you couldn't get rid of your own ugly moral character.
00:15:01What? Did you just call me?
00:15:05There's a man's life at stake here and you're standing in my way.
00:15:10Don't don the mantle of doctor when you're only capable of harm.
00:15:13Now stop getting in my way or I promise you, you will be bubbling at the mouth very soon.
00:15:20Oh, yeah?
00:15:21Hey, you wanna see real pain? Where's the dog?
00:15:23Well, put down the dog!
00:15:25With pleasure.
00:15:41Left leaves the wrong breath.
00:15:47You don't deserve to call yourself a doctor.
00:15:53She's been poisoned!
00:15:56It was her!
00:15:57Do you see any poison on me?
00:16:00Medicine in the right hands can save lives, but in the wrong hands, it becomes nothing but poison.
00:16:06This bitch isn't good enough to take down the queen of medicine!
00:16:09Do you have one of your antidotes on you?
00:16:11Of course!
00:16:12I've saved entire civilizations with my antidotes.
00:16:16If I wanna save someone, even the Grim Reaper can't stop me.
00:16:35Why is she spitting blood?
00:16:37This wasn't supposed to happen!
00:16:38I thought you said even the Grim Reaper can't get in your way.
00:16:42Angel herbalist.
00:16:43This is what I call...
00:16:45Malpractice.
00:16:47This isn't fatal. She'll live.
00:16:50But she deserves a little punishment.
00:16:52Well, where's the jacuzzi I asked for?
00:16:54Jacuzzi is ready?
00:16:55Right this way.
00:16:56Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:16:58What the hell is going on?
00:16:59You say you want your son to live on to give you tons of grandchildren, don't you?
00:17:03Then stop getting in my way. Every second counts.
00:17:08Let's go for our dip, shall we?
00:17:14General Armstrong, your family is the richest and most powerful in the nation.
00:17:19Are you really gonna let this hobo slut touch your son?
00:17:23Hold on. You two are going in there... alone?
00:17:27If you don't want these drooling vultures to see your son naked, then sure, invite everyone in.
00:17:33Alright. But I warn you, no funny business.
00:17:42They work they all are in.
00:18:05I want you to...
00:18:07There are four movies.
00:18:07Oh, look.
00:18:39You really shouldn't leave your precious son in there with that homeless conwoman, General Armstrong.
00:18:43Exactly!
00:18:44What if she gets pregnant by him?
00:18:46She could blackmail you for millions.
00:18:50That's what I would do if I was that poor.
00:18:52And then the Armstrong family will be the laughingstock of the nation, held for ransom by a homeless woman.
00:18:59Dad, you can't seriously be listening to that.
00:19:02We have to have faith.
00:19:04Where did you actually find this low light?
00:19:08Uh, on the streets?
00:19:11Are you shitting me?
00:19:13You found this bum on the streets?
00:19:15Are you nuts?
00:19:15You don't know her.
00:19:17You don't know her background.
00:19:18She could be a psychotic murderer.
00:19:20That is it, General.
00:19:21You have to go in and stop this now.
00:19:22You're right.
00:19:23That's it.
00:19:24I'm shutting down this clown show right now.
00:19:26James, let's go.
00:19:27Yes, sir.
00:19:38I told you all to stay out.
00:19:46This is a critical moment for you.
00:19:47We can't be interrupted.
00:19:48Otherwise, we'd both die.
00:19:54I'm not going to let this homeless hoochie mama trap my son.
00:20:00I'm going to save him myself.
00:20:02No, thank you.
00:20:07You see that, General?
00:20:08This isn't just a gull-dicking con woman.
00:20:10This is a witchcraft.
00:20:13I know what this is.
00:20:15This is the dark witch.
00:20:17I've heard of her.
00:20:18She uses her dark magic to steal the hearts of young, handsome men, and then she eats them alive.
00:20:24I'm going to kill that bitch before she takes my son.
00:20:27James, get the SWAT team.
00:20:30Yes, sir.
00:20:34You're regaining consciousness.
00:20:45Help me.
00:20:47I just want to...
00:20:52Something's wrong.
00:20:56You were drunk with an aphrodisiac.
00:20:59Lysander Armstrong and his fortune will soon be mine.
00:21:04That's one more thing I'm saving you from.
00:21:13Sir?
00:21:14The SWAT team is here.
00:21:16Captain Morales.
00:21:19My son is trapped behind there with a devious, man-eating witch.
00:21:24I need you to do whatever you can to tear down that door.
00:21:27Rest assured, General Armstrong.
00:21:29We'll break down that door and bury that bitch alive.
00:21:36Right.
00:21:37He writes the wrong.
00:21:42Human.
00:21:46Who the fuck are you?
00:21:48And why the hell are we naked?
00:21:51Good.
00:21:52You're awake.
00:21:53I'm saving you.
00:21:54Saving you?
00:21:56By bathing with me?
00:21:58Who are you?
00:21:59You're a fucking spy?
00:22:01I swear to God, I'll have you arrested for this.
00:22:05You're the one who's trying to kiss me in your stipper.
00:22:10I will never.
00:22:11Oh, really?
00:22:25Look who's guilty now.
00:22:29Look, I don't know what the fuck this is, all right?
00:22:31But it is a biological fact.
00:22:34A man is attracted to a naked woman and her breasts.
00:22:39Science, okay?
00:22:40It just means that my body is physically...
00:22:45You're distracting me with your phone.
00:22:47And I'm a professional.
00:22:49I hear Lysander's voice.
00:22:51Captain, do something now.
00:22:53Ready!
00:22:58We're almost there.
00:23:00Aim.
00:23:02Get him, boys.
00:23:04Get him.
00:23:06Fire!
00:23:10Fire!
00:23:25Those amicils.
00:23:27How is this possible?
00:23:29It's not even a scratch.
00:23:31I told you this is dark magic.
00:23:33Of course, your earthly bullets won't do a thing.
00:23:35No.
00:23:36I believe Miss Trixie is a good person.
00:23:38She's not the dark witch.
00:23:40Young Master Armstrong, you are too easily fooled.
00:23:44This homeless psycho doesn't even have the skills to make a living.
00:23:48How is she going to save someone else's life?
00:23:50That's right.
00:23:51The Queen Angel and I are already the top female doctors in the world.
00:23:55If we can't save him, no one can.
00:23:58Except for the goddess healer.
00:24:00Think about it.
00:24:00We heard Lysander's voice.
00:24:02He's been in a coma for two years.
00:24:04Miss Trixie must have woken him up.
00:24:05You're right.
00:24:06This homeless girl is maybe the goddess.
00:24:12Maybe this homeless girl is really the goddess.
00:24:15No, no.
00:24:16Absolutely not.
00:24:18There is no way this hobo girl is better than us.
00:24:21How could you know for sure?
00:24:22Right now, what we need to do is not interrupt Miss Trixie.
00:24:26You're wrong, sir.
00:24:27This homeless snake is using the forbidden techniques on Master Lysander.
00:24:32It's called borderline revival.
00:24:34She uses torturous pain to wake the patient.
00:24:37But only temporarily.
00:24:39It's a trick to pull the wool over your eyes and ears.
00:24:44That means my son is in tremendous pain.
00:24:46I'm going to ask you two to do whatever you can.
00:24:49To kill that antler rod bearing witch.
00:24:52My son doesn't deserve this.
00:24:54He is dying right now, naked, in a jacuzzi, with a smelly vagrant.
00:24:59Then it looks like it's up to me.
00:25:01The witch doctor.
00:25:02Only I know the right techniques to take her down.
00:25:06My son's life is in your hands.
00:25:09You heal him, I will give you whatever your heart desires.
00:25:13I don't know who you are, but there is no way I am letting you rip my golden bachelor away
00:25:19from me.
00:25:21This is it.
00:25:23The finishing touch.
00:25:24I must now give you the kiss of life.
00:25:27So we can both survive.
00:25:47It's poison gas.
00:25:49The poison gas will smoke them out and end her torture over Master Lysander.
00:25:55Poison gas?
00:25:56My son is in there.
00:25:58You're jeopardizing his life as well.
00:26:00No, don't worry, General.
00:26:01Gold diggers like her only care about themselves.
00:26:05Soon, she'll come out crying to Mommy.
00:26:08Then we can reverse the poison on your son.
00:26:10And then he can marry one of us.
00:26:13They really won't stop until they get both of us killed.
00:26:18I knew they promised you that I'd save you.
00:26:21It's now or never.
00:26:35What the hell are they doing in there?
00:26:37It's been over ten minutes.
00:26:38Wait a second.
00:26:40You don't think that they're...
00:26:42You!
00:26:43You suffocated my brother and Miss Trixie in there!
00:26:45Don't point your fingers at me!
00:26:47If your brother's dead, it's because of that homeless gold digger!
00:26:51Oh my god.
00:26:51Yeah?
00:26:52She's the one who sealed the door shut.
00:26:54I mean, she probably locked themselves in there on accident.
00:26:58Miss Trixie wouldn't have to do that if you weren't trying to sabotage her from saving my brother!
00:27:02This is taking way too long!
00:27:05Captain Morales, it's time to get out the big guns.
00:27:08These bazookas can flatten even a bomb shelter.
00:27:13Bazooka.
00:27:13She won't be able to hide even if she's the devil himself.
00:27:16Crap.
00:27:17Oh my god.
00:27:17Get back, son.
00:27:18Oh.
00:27:20Ready.
00:27:21Aim!
00:27:22Oh shit.
00:27:27Quit your whining and stand down.
00:27:41The parasite's been extracted.
00:27:44Shoot her dead now!
00:27:45Do I need to fix your hearing too?
00:27:47I said stand down!
00:27:50Don't listen to her.
00:27:51She's a fraud.
00:27:52A termite to the field of medicine.
00:27:55I just saved this man that otherwise would have died in your care.
00:27:58If I'm a termite, then you're worse than a disease-spreading tick.
00:28:03Wait a second.
00:28:04Are you saying you cured my son?
00:28:06He'll wake in just a moment.
00:28:07You can see for yourself.
00:28:09Well, now you're just asking to be exposed.
00:28:12That is it.
00:28:13No more stalling, General.
00:28:15If you won't punish her, I will.
00:28:21Don't hurt her.
00:28:27He's a cure.
00:28:34His pulse is regular.
00:28:35In fact, it's never been better.
00:28:40There's no sign of illness, infection, or disease.
00:28:51Miss Trixie did it, Dad.
00:28:53Lysander's warm again.
00:28:54He's not cold and pale like before.
00:28:56And his heart is strong.
00:28:58Come.
00:28:59Feel it.
00:29:01I saved my son.
00:29:04Next time, don't go seeking medical advice from those with ill will.
00:29:07Your son would have otherwise died by their greedy and unskilled hands.
00:29:12I've learned my lesson.
00:29:13I will not let these two nutjobs ever practice their voodoo voodoo magic again.
00:29:18Wait, wait.
00:29:19No, no.
00:29:19There is only one person in the world who is more skilled in the field of medicine than the Queen,
00:29:25Angel, and I.
00:29:26It's the goddess healer.
00:29:33Could you really be the goddess of healing?
00:29:36But rumor has it that the goddess of healing is well over 100 years old.
00:29:40And you don't look a day after 20.
00:29:44It doesn't matter who I am.
00:29:45What matters is that the patient is healthy again.
00:29:48Devon, I've repaid your kindness by fulfilling your wish of saving your brother.
00:29:52Take care.
00:29:53No, wait.
00:29:54Miss Trixie, we still haven't fulfilled our promise to you yet.
00:29:57He's right.
00:29:59We are men of our words.
00:30:00And as I promised you, my heir, Lysander, would take you as a wife if you cured him.
00:30:04And you did just that.
00:30:06Of course, you're welcome to marry me instead.
00:30:10I really appreciate it, but I'm sorry.
00:30:15I'm already engaged.
00:30:19Already engaged?
00:30:20I am.
00:30:21I've been patiently awaiting his return from deployment for the last three years.
00:30:25And he's coming back today.
00:30:27But don't be disappointed.
00:30:29Really, I'm no one special.
00:30:31I just got lucky with you, brother.
00:30:33Some guru taught me that spa water can cure all kinds of ailments.
00:30:36But you're still Lysander's savior.
00:30:38Please, let me give you what I promised.
00:30:41Take the gold.
00:30:41No, really.
00:30:43I don't need anything.
00:30:45I just believe in doing good in the world.
00:30:51Trixie, it's your fiancé.
00:30:53He's back.
00:30:54And he says he's breaking up with you.
00:30:58I must go.
00:31:06Hobo close.
00:31:07Halo glow.
00:31:08I bet the goddess healer is just like Miss Trixie.
00:31:12It was just dumb luck.
00:31:14She's even dumber for not accepting his marriage proposal.
00:31:17She could have been the richest woman in the world.
00:31:19Marrying the hottest, most powerful bachelor around.
00:31:25I'm going to marry that homeless woman.
00:31:32Oh, my God.
00:31:33I mean, I don't know about that homeless bimbo, but this is godly.
00:31:38No, no, no, no, no, Lysander.
00:31:42Lysander's job was supposed to be mine.
00:31:45I'd so much rather share him with you than let that penniless, ugly bitch have him.
00:31:50You two nutjobs are a disgrace to your profession.
00:31:53Take these two weirdos out of here and revoke their licenses.
00:31:57No.
00:31:58We're not brides.
00:31:59I know she's just better than us.
00:32:02Oh, my God.
00:32:04Oh, my God.
00:32:06We were truly blessed to have Miss Trixie here, huh?
00:32:09She's no average Jane.
00:32:10No, she isn't.
00:32:11She said it was just dumb luck.
00:32:13But if she truly had these special skills,
00:32:16why did she wear that shit-stained dress and had an impeccable-looking doll?
00:32:20But think about the impenetrable walls.
00:32:21No normal person could have done that.
00:32:23Goddess or not, homeless or not, I don't care.
00:32:27I have never met a woman like that.
00:32:28I have to find her.
00:32:29I have to make her my wife.
00:32:31She won my heart over, too.
00:32:32But if my bestest big bro wants her, I'll help you find her.
00:32:36All right, listen.
00:32:38I need help finding three wedding gifts.
00:32:45I'm dumping Trixie.
00:32:46So I want you, your granddaughters, filthy things out of my house now.
00:32:53Trixie paid for this house.
00:32:54She waited for you for three years.
00:32:58She was dumb enough to put my name on the lease.
00:33:00And I'm upgrading for a better girlfriend now.
00:33:02One with some serious fuck-you money.
00:33:05So get lost.
00:33:07Who gave you permission to bark like a rabbit hyena in my house?
00:33:16Grandma.
00:33:17Beatrice, Trixie, Amori.
00:33:21I've been dying to throw this in your face.
00:33:23I'm dumping you for your best friend, Marissa.
00:33:27In fact, the wedding's tomorrow.
00:33:30So sign over to the house now.
00:33:37You gave me this ring and asked me to wait.
00:33:40And I did.
00:33:42For three years while you were deployed.
00:33:44Yet you cheat on me with my best friend.
00:33:47And now you're trying to swindle my home?
00:33:50Do you have no shame?
00:33:51We were together for three years and, uh, it was a complete waste of my life when I could have
00:33:56been with a loaded girl like Marissa.
00:34:03That's how much you would owe me if I was in the rent-a-boyfriend business.
00:34:08I see you're fulfilling your highest aspirations of being a low-grade male prostitute.
00:34:17Oh, yeah?
00:34:19Well, Marissa is so much better than you.
00:34:23She grew up even poorer than you.
00:34:26And now she's the CEO of an entire corporation.
00:34:31Dude.
00:34:32Oh.
00:34:33And you?
00:34:34Oh, there's still nothing.
00:34:37So you think she's an upgrade.
00:34:39Of course she's an upgrade.
00:34:42Look what she, uh, got me for my engagement.
00:34:45Oops.
00:34:47Yeah.
00:34:48That's maybe worth one millionth the presidential contract I gave her.
00:34:57You gave her the presidential contract?
00:35:00I certainly did.
00:35:00In fact, Marissa, you and your dimwit brother only have everything you have all thanks to me.
00:35:13Oh, I think she's losing it, bro.
00:35:15That breakup must have hit her hard.
00:35:18You two are the ungrateful, cheating scum here.
00:35:22My granddaughter supported you and your entire family for three years while you were gone.
00:35:28How dare you insult her?
00:35:31It's okay, Grandma.
00:35:32Let's not stoop to that level.
00:35:35Poor Edna.
00:35:36She still doesn't know what you're doing out there on the streets, huh?
00:35:39What is he talking about, Jersey?
00:35:41Show her, Bob.
00:35:47This is how embarrassingly useless your granddaughter is.
00:35:50She didn't purchase this house on her own.
00:35:53She was begging on the street for money.
00:35:56I can't be caught with a piss-poor nobody like you.
00:36:00Even if you got no game, I got street cred I got out of keep.
00:36:03You dig?
00:36:03The word you're looking for is dignity.
00:36:06And you're one to speak, cheater.
00:36:10Is this true, Trixie?
00:36:15I've been broadening my horizons, Grandma.
00:36:17I want to see how regular, everyday people live so that I can help them.
00:36:22Of course, those without substance underneath would never understand that.
00:36:27What is that supposed to mean?
00:36:28It means the new girlfriend you think is an upgrade is actually a downgrade.
00:36:37Enough bullshitting already.
00:36:39Just sign the damn papers and we can each get on with our lives.
00:36:54At your wedding, I will.
00:36:56What?
00:36:57If you won't do good by me of breaking things off before two-timing me with my best friend,
00:37:02why should I do good by you?
00:37:05I'll give you my John Hancock at your wedding as a charity to you.
00:37:10Fucking bitch!
00:37:12You better keep your word.
00:37:13Oh, that's rich.
00:37:15After tomorrow, you will never feel so rich ever again.
00:37:18Do you remember that?
00:37:26Trixie, Marissa's a millionaire now.
00:37:29They'll destroy you if you show even so much as a hair at their wedding.
00:37:33Grandma, I have to confess something to you.
00:37:36I've secretly amassed a fortune worth trillions.
00:37:40Trillions?
00:37:43That would make you the richest person on the planet.
00:37:47It's because of the healing hands I inherited from Asseplius, the god of healing.
00:37:52I've saved several world leaders with these hands.
00:37:56That's how I was able to give Marissa the presidential contract and become the goddess healer.
00:38:01It makes me angrier hearing her name knowing how she betrayed you.
00:38:05But please, Trixie dear, I know it was to broken your heart.
00:38:10But embellishing your worth and who you are, it will only delay the healing process.
00:38:17You don't have to believe me just yet.
00:38:19But after we lost mom and dad because we didn't have the money for their medical bills,
00:38:24I vowed that I would do everything I can to serve those in need.
00:38:29That's why I'm taking everything back from Butch and I'm giving it back to charity.
00:38:33You've always had an angel's heart.
00:38:35I'm certain you will meet someone who will treat you right, who actually deserves you.
00:38:41You will see tomorrow, Grandma.
00:38:45Oh, yeah.
00:38:51You said Trixie's crashing your wedding?
00:38:53She was bullying us too, Asse.
00:38:56She's probably trying to extort you now that she knows you're rich as fuck.
00:39:00I hope when nobody steps on Snake, Snake bites back hard.
00:39:05So let her come and embarrass herself.
00:39:07Yeah.
00:39:08You mean...
00:39:10We broadcast that video of you?
00:39:16Yes.
00:39:16Her cavewoman's take the 19th century tin can.
00:39:20She'll prop me up higher on my pedestal and the whole world sees her in her homeless mess
00:39:24against my presidential glow-up.
00:39:26Let's turn this party into her funeral.
00:39:35There he is.
00:39:38Welcome home, brother.
00:39:40Welcome home, General!
00:39:44Sir, the homeless woman who saved you, Miss Trixie, this is the file of her ex, Butch Tanner.
00:39:49He served with your regiment in the Marines.
00:39:51You mean the Butch Tanner that can barely carry supplies?
00:39:54Well, she's been providing for him and his entire family while he's been deployed overseas, sir.
00:39:58So she waited for him for years and then he betrayed her?
00:40:01Fucking coward.
00:40:02According to intel, she's planning to bring it down on them at their wedding.
00:40:05Then we should join her.
00:40:08Men, I'm only alive today because of that virtuous woman and her incredible power that saved my life.
00:40:13So she needs our support.
00:40:15Will you join me in protecting her?
00:40:16Yes, sir!
00:40:17We will not allow her to protect her, sir!
00:40:20Then let's roll.
00:40:36Welcome, everyone, to my wedding.
00:40:39Today is a very special day for me and Butch.
00:40:41Not only are we getting married, but in just one hour, my company will be receiving the presidential contract,
00:40:46allowing my biomedical company to go public.
00:40:53Congratulations on the contract once again, Mrs.
00:40:55Wakeham, Stowe.
00:40:57Butch is taking my last name.
00:40:59Oh, and please don't be so uptight, Secretary Cho.
00:41:02You are the secretary of the entire U.S. Health Department, but this is a partay after all.
00:41:07I see some of the most important people in the nation have also arrived to celebrate you.
00:41:13The U.S. President will also be arriving soon to give you the contract herself.
00:41:19It's an honor.
00:41:20And that's why Sasa is the best wife a man could ever dream of.
00:41:25We will make sure the crowd is entertained tonight.
00:41:28We'll let the wedding begin!
00:41:32Not so fast.
00:41:34The party doesn't start until I say it does.
00:41:58You two really are a match made in hell.
00:42:00So I've come to save your guests from this oncoming train wreck.
00:42:04I don't recognize it from any of our elite circles.
00:42:07Who is she?
00:42:08Uh, this is our entertainment for tonight, sir.
00:42:11Just watch.
00:42:15Trixie, what are you doing here?
00:42:16This isn't the homeless shelter you lost.
00:42:18I bet she's here to bum a meal off us.
00:42:21You know, being this poor.
00:42:24Me, from a meal.
00:42:26Have you forgotten that it was I who bankrolled you two for the last three years?
00:42:30And what evidence do you have of that?
00:42:32Look at me, then go look at yourself in the mirror.
00:42:34I'm a millionaire CEO.
00:42:37Even the first woman president will be here any second now to congratulate me.
00:42:41And you're nothing but a washed up sewer rat.
00:42:44Sasa, she's like so obsessed with me.
00:42:46She's like...
00:42:48See, everyone?
00:42:49Butch already cut ties with his ex, but she's so...
00:42:52Shameless and desperate that she'd still show up to my wedding to suck up to me.
00:42:58This is what poor, sad girls do.
00:43:00They beg for scraps from us, the rich and glorious.
00:43:05Rejecting much, Marissa?
00:43:06You might feel all high and mighty now, but don't bite the hand that feeds you.
00:43:11Especially when I'm the one who's giving you the contract.
00:43:19You giving me the contract?
00:43:21You have no skills, no education, no connection.
00:43:25So how could you possibly have a pool to get the U.S. fucking president to give me a billion
00:43:31dollar contract?
00:43:32We both share humble beginnings, Marissa.
00:43:34And I saw potential in you.
00:43:36Even trusted you as my best friend.
00:43:38But I recognize now that greed has poisoned you.
00:43:42Don't be all sore now just because I stole your man.
00:43:45This is what us rich girls do.
00:43:47They steal from lame spinsters for fun.
00:43:50Damn right.
00:43:51You were too embarrassing for me.
00:43:55Sasa tramples you any day.
00:43:57I can say that now that I'm marrying the rich.
00:44:00Bravo.
00:44:01Self-admission of a gold digger.
00:44:02Quick, somebody put that on a memoir.
00:44:04Sasa, she's embarrassing me in front of everyone.
00:44:07You should make yourself.
00:44:08Don't listen to her, everyone.
00:44:09She's the gold digging, blood sucking leech.
00:44:12I don't even have to lift a finger and you're already embarrassing yourself in front of everyone for me, butch.
00:44:19You may look and sound like a man, but you're nothing but a pathetic coward.
00:44:23Okay, enough!
00:44:24You know what I always couldn't stand about you?
00:44:26Your moral posturing.
00:44:28But guess what?
00:44:30Morals are just lies to make you lame girls feel better about yourselves.
00:44:33That's why no man will choose you over Marissa Trixie.
00:44:37Because I've got the material goods.
00:44:39And you're just all empty talk.
00:44:41I'm not here to request to be chosen.
00:44:43Because I'm the one who's doing the choosing.
00:44:47See this?
00:44:59Oh my god.
00:45:01Is that the billion dollar contract for Sasa?
00:45:06The one that's supposed to make us all rich as fuck?
00:45:08No, absolutely not.
00:45:10I don't believe it.
00:45:12You all sound so scared already.
00:45:14Don't worry.
00:45:15This isn't that contract.
00:45:17It's the lease to the modest home you try to swindle from me.
00:45:23See everyone?
00:45:24She's just trying to bluff us.
00:45:26But you don't even have the guts to go all the way.
00:45:28Look at her following orders.
00:45:29I asked her to sign over the lease and here she is.
00:45:32Like a good little peasant slave.
00:45:35That house is worth all her life savings.
00:45:40Do you want to, uh, I don't know, beg for a little treat while you're at it?
00:45:54You must understand me.
00:45:56I'm here to take back everything I've ever given you.
00:45:59I'm giving it to charity.
00:46:07Bro, she's gone cuckoo in the head.
00:46:10She thinks that just because she rented a pretty little dress she can pretend to be a deep pocket-investing
00:46:14baddie.
00:46:15You wish you had that kind of money to just toss away, Trixie.
00:46:18It's just a drop in the bucket for me.
00:46:20Uh, I know what this is.
00:46:23You've gone delusional.
00:46:24And you think you're Cinderella so you can just show up to a fancy party and some Prince Charming will
00:46:29scoop you into money forever?
00:46:30Well, that's not happening.
00:46:32Security!
00:46:33Lock the doors.
00:46:34This woman doesn't leave until we're through with her.
00:46:39This is where your dreams will die, bitch.
00:46:45We found Miss Trixie Lysander.
00:46:47She's being cornered by her ex and his mistress at the Wickham wedding right now.
00:46:50Butch Tanner.
00:46:51Well, he's gonna wish he died in battle after I'm done with him.
00:46:54Let's go.
00:46:59You think a few toy guns scare me, Marissa?
00:47:01I've saved plenty of people for much worse.
00:47:05Including your head of command, Butch.
00:47:08General Lysander Armstrong.
00:47:10You mean the legendary war hero?
00:47:12He's been in a coma for years after he saved the nation from a terrorist attack.
00:47:16You're an unskilled, unemployed, ugly leech.
00:47:20So how could you possibly have this magical ability to heal someone like General Lysander Armstrong?
00:47:26No one here is gonna believe you.
00:47:27If you really cured the incurable General, then Sasa is the fucking Virgin Mary.
00:47:33And she's not.
00:47:33You're just asking to be humiliated, Trixie.
00:47:37Show them, Butch.
00:47:43See for yourselves, everyone.
00:47:46Trixie's just a preloading beggar.
00:47:51She won't leave me and Marissa alone, because we're rich as fuck now.
00:47:55I'm a major in the Marines.
00:47:57Sasa, she has a billion-dollar biomedical contract with the military.
00:48:03Approved by the first female president of the United States herself, bitch.
00:48:08How despicable.
00:48:09She's just trying to leech off you like a parasitic gold digger.
00:48:13Get out of here.
00:48:14No one wants to marry you.
00:48:15No free meals for the poor.
00:48:17Do you see this, Trixie?
00:48:19This is high society.
00:48:21So you're either born on a silver spoon, or you're as accomplished as me to be here.
00:48:26Maybe if you do some serious dick-sucking here, maybe someone will drop a couple bucks in your tin can.
00:48:35I already have everything one can dream of, but I valued our friendship, Marissa, which is why I came here
00:48:40to give you a second chance.
00:48:42To see if you'd apologize and admit to your backstabbing.
00:48:45But no.
00:48:46You stooped so low, it disgusts me.
00:48:49Nothing is more disgusting than you standing on street corners like a bum.
00:48:54And who knows if you've already started offering sexual services.
00:48:59Well then, why don't you get on your knees for me, Trixie?
00:49:03My brother will never take you back.
00:49:06No man will marry an embarrassment like you.
00:49:09But make me happy?
00:49:11And I might consider making you my personal prostitute.
00:49:25How dare you hit my brother!
00:49:27I'm never letting you leave here alive!
00:49:30That's awesome.
00:49:31I do something.
00:49:32Don't worry, my dear.
00:49:34After I'm done with you, Trixie, not even the goddess of healing will be able to save you.
00:49:40Oh, is that so?
00:49:42Security!
00:49:44Get down on your knees and give Bob one hell of a blowjob in front of everybody here,
00:49:50or I'll pop so many holes in you, the men here won't know which one to fuck.
00:49:54I don't need to be the goddess of anything to punish you.
00:49:57Any of the powerful leaders I've saved before could crush you before you even touch me.
00:50:02Dream on!
00:50:04You wish General Lysander scooped you off your feet, but you weren't good enough for me.
00:50:08You're definitely not good enough for him.
00:50:10Enough!
00:50:12You're souring my party, so you either get the fuck out, or I'm gonna shoot you.
00:50:18On the count of three!
00:50:20I think I quite like it here.
00:50:21Two!
00:50:33This wine is so delicious.
00:50:36One!
00:50:37Shoot!
00:50:40Nobody is laying a hand on my future wife.
00:51:01Who the hell is this?
00:51:06I'm sorry that I'm late.
00:51:07Did they hurt you?
00:51:09No, I'm fine.
00:51:11But, um, when did I become your future wife?
00:51:15You saved me, Trixie, remember?
00:51:18I'm a man of my word.
00:51:20They're never gonna hurt you ever again.
00:51:22Really, it was nothing.
00:51:24I saved you because you're a good man, not because I want you to owe me any favors.
00:51:35I see what this is.
00:51:36You're the one who cheated on me, Trixie.
00:51:38Look at you guys all lovey-dove.
00:51:40Don't try to pin this on her.
00:51:42She waited for you for three years.
00:51:43This is the kind of woman of virtue that a man would die for.
00:51:48Virtue?
00:51:50Don't make me laugh.
00:51:52She's probably out there giving blowjobs for cash.
00:51:54No man who, in a hundred-foot pole, would want to touch her.
00:51:58She should be happy Bob was willing to give her some.
00:52:05I see her in the Marines.
00:52:08I'm a major.
00:52:09You know, look, man.
00:52:11I know Trixie is like a, I don't know, a seven now that she's all cleaned up.
00:52:16But don't waste your manhood on a whiny, worthless woman like that.
00:52:20Ow!
00:52:21Ow!
00:52:22Ow!
00:52:25A real man never talks about a woman that way.
00:52:29You're a coward.
00:52:40We don't need to fight fire with fire to deal with the likes of them.
00:52:44You're very gracious, Trixie.
00:52:46You know that?
00:52:49You're only getting off with it because she's so kind.
00:52:51So you're going to do me the favor of never coming near her again.
00:52:53You understand?
00:52:54You want to fuck with me, little dipshit?
00:52:56I'm a fucking major.
00:52:58You're probably lowest rank of the military grunts.
00:53:01I'll, I'll destroy you.
00:53:03Do you really not know who this is, Butch?
00:53:05I thought you were in the Marines.
00:53:07What have you been doing this whole time if you don't know who this war hero is?
00:53:11He was just a supply boy.
00:53:15War hero?
00:53:17Is this all part of your plan, Trixie?
00:53:20Poor girl.
00:53:21Did you sell your house to hire this actor so you can feel better about yourself?
00:53:25A woman's worth is tied to the man she marries.
00:53:28Trixie is worthless because that guy looks like a cowboy.
00:53:33With a bum girl and a pimp.
00:53:36What a pair.
00:53:38Seems like they don't know who you are since you've been out of action for so long.
00:53:42Maybe we should try to pay some off some more.
00:53:44Don't you think?
00:53:46Bring in the wedding gifts.
00:53:55What is all this?
00:53:57Trixie, listen.
00:53:57I know that you didn't ask for anything after you saved my life.
00:54:01But I know that we shared a moment.
00:54:06I'm not the kind of man to get close to a woman and then just disappear.
00:54:10It's not in my nature.
00:54:12I'm like somebody else here.
00:54:15Listen, Trixie.
00:54:16Trixie, I have never met a woman like you.
00:54:22So incredible and kind and beautiful.
00:54:25So I know that you're the one for me.
00:54:29This guy's either nuts or a really, really good actor.
00:54:34Oscar worthy.
00:54:35Oscar worthy.
00:54:37No.
00:54:38First gift.
00:54:43Trixie, I know that you just lost your home.
00:54:46So I'm gifting you with your own new mansion.
00:54:49Worth $500 million.
00:54:51Previously owned by Jennifer Aniston.
00:54:55Second gift.
00:54:59This contains all the rights to my entire fortune.
00:55:03Which is now yours.
00:55:04Entire fortune from a cowboy actor?
00:55:07It must be that easy.
00:55:08They already spent their entire life savings on this clown show.
00:55:11They've got nothing left.
00:55:12Why, Sander, I really don't care for any of us.
00:55:16No, look, I know.
00:55:17I know that you are the farthest thing from a material woman.
00:55:20Okay?
00:55:21Which is exactly why, well, my third gift is, um, well.
00:55:26I know that you have a man to help.
00:55:35Oh.
00:55:39Oh.
00:55:41Cleo.
00:55:43Hey.
00:55:44Oh, my God.
00:55:47You found my dog.
00:55:51Trixie, I'm just a man.
00:55:53But with you, it's so much more.
00:55:55Trixie Amore.
00:56:00Will you marry me?
00:56:03You know I can't say no to this doggo.
00:56:09Yes, I will marry you.
00:56:27Go, go, power couple.
00:56:30Woo!
00:56:31Okay, stop.
00:56:33The only power couple here is Butch and I.
00:56:36Let's remind everyone how worthless Trixie is.
00:56:41No man in their right mind would marry that embarrassing sack of scraps.
00:56:46Hey.
00:56:47I don't care if she's homeless or not, but I'm making this woman my wife, which means that she will
00:56:52be treated as and cherished as the most precious woman on Earth.
00:56:56Understand?
00:57:00You still don't realize that my brother is the most powerful man on Earth.
00:57:05This is General Lysander Armstrong.
00:57:15As if, like the almighty General Lysander Armstrong would propose to a homeless prostitute like Trixie.
00:57:22Yes, the Armstrong family basically controlled the global stock market.
00:57:26Lysander Armstrong would sooner marry the Princess of England than someone from the lowest rank of society.
00:57:31I bet my life you're all just actors.
00:57:35Then you better enjoy your last breath.
00:57:37Come on, Lysander.
00:57:38What are we waiting for?
00:57:38Let's show them what we can do and get revenge for Trixie.
00:57:40What can a bunch of piss poor people do to us, the elites?
00:57:44Infect us with your poor people bad luck?
00:57:46She wishes she could blame her low status on bad luck.
00:57:50Truth is, she's just a useless, lazy bitchin' bum.
00:57:54She's utterly unmarriable.
00:57:55Unmarriable.
00:57:59I can dispose of them in other means if you don't prefer violence.
00:58:03I'd handle them myself, but...
00:58:07I'll let you do all the heavy lifting.
00:58:09Go ahead, Lysander.
00:58:17Yes, hello, this is Lysander.
00:58:18Please bankrupt Marissa Wickham for me.
00:58:22Oh my gosh, I'm so scared.
00:58:24Anyone these days could call anyone and pretend to be on the phone.
00:58:35Uh, hello?
00:58:37Yes.
00:58:39What?
00:58:44I'm a bankrupt!
00:58:47Oh my gosh, please, please, please.
00:58:54Hey, hey, hey, are you sure that was the call, Sassu?
00:58:58That was a real call?
00:58:59People don't just suddenly go bankrupt like that.
00:59:01My company's dead, evaporated, poof, it's in thin air.
00:59:08That's impossible.
00:59:10Who are you?
00:59:11What did you do?
00:59:13Secretary Cho, you said you're the Secretary of Health, right?
00:59:16And you yourself said that the Armstrong family owns the entire global stock market.
00:59:20Could that be how they bankrupted Miss Wickham?
00:59:23Then that means...
00:59:27You're really Lysander Armstrong, the richest and most powerful man in the country.
00:59:33Trixie's married.
00:59:35The famed war hero.
00:59:36The man every girl wants and every man wants to be.
00:59:41Now you believe me?
00:59:42Those who do bad will always end up losing everything.
00:59:46There's got to be some trick to this.
00:59:48You guys are just bums trying to extort money from us.
00:59:51It's awesome.
00:59:52It's awesome.
00:59:53It's awesome.
00:59:53Please.
01:00:00I know why you're all over Trixie.
01:00:02Because you've been in the military for so long, you don't know what a real woman can do for you.
01:00:07Let me take you to my wedding chamber and I'll show you a good time.
01:00:12Do you want to rub your hands for me?
01:00:14Or I'll have them removed for you.
01:00:20I would never be interested in a woman who's as vile and cruel and wicked as you are.
01:00:26Guess the cheater gets cheated on eventually.
01:00:31Sansa was just trying to save the company.
01:00:34I don't blame her at all.
01:00:35Your double standards are incredible.
01:00:37Okay, you don't want me.
01:00:39Fine.
01:00:40But there's plenty of other efficiency.
01:00:42I can give you a room full of pageant winners.
01:00:4418 years old.
01:00:46Fresh for the taking.
01:00:54I did that so you wouldn't have to, Miss Trixie.
01:00:57Thank you, Devin.
01:00:59Marissa, not only have you backstabbed me, your best friend, by stealing my fiancee, but now you'd sell out other
01:01:07innocent girls just to get your company back?
01:01:09You're an insult to all good women out there.
01:01:12No, to all of humanity.
01:01:14So now, everything that I've ever given you to, I'm taking it all back.
01:01:20Wait, everyone, stop.
01:01:25They're imposters.
01:01:30I just got off the phone with the president and she said your contract is not getting cancelled because it
01:01:35was assigned by the goddess healer herself.
01:01:37So we won't go bankrupt?
01:01:40The goddess healer?
01:01:41You mean the eccentric and highly elusive sage in the field of medicine approved of my biomedical products?
01:01:47Yes, that's the highest honor anyone can have in the field of health and medicine.
01:01:51The goddess healer's motto is the right rewrites the wrong, the left leave the wrong bereft.
01:01:58That means she's rewarding me.
01:02:00The president would never let your company go bankrupt.
01:02:04In fact, she's on her way now.
01:02:08So you're telling me this dashingly handsome motherfucker over here isn't Lysander Armstrong?
01:02:14Who the fuck cares who he is?
01:02:15If the president and the goddess healer approves of my product, who cares about this washed up war hero?
01:02:21We can break his legs, break his arms.
01:02:23No one would even bat an eye.
01:02:24She even gave us explicit permission to call upon secret services.
01:02:28FBI!
01:02:30FBI!
01:02:31You're under arrest for fraudulent claims and identity theft.
01:02:36Gotcha.
01:02:41Guess I still get the last laugh, Trixie.
01:02:44No, don't arrest her!
01:02:46Trixie's a good person.
01:02:48Please, officer, don't arrest her!
01:02:50Grandma, Mr. Rogers, Mrs. Williams, what are you all doing here?
01:02:54The neighbors heard about the breakup between you and Butch.
01:02:57We were worried, so we came here to back you up.
01:03:00Listen, officer.
01:03:01I can attest that Trixie Amoria is a good neighbor.
01:03:05She's very kind-hearted and would never break the law.
01:03:08Yes, and one time when my daughter needed university tuition,
01:03:11Trixie gave her everything she had just to help her out.
01:03:15She also paid for my recent heart surgery as well.
01:03:18My fiancé really is an incredible woman.
01:03:21She's an angel descended from heaven.
01:03:28You must be the criminal pretending to be General Lysander Armstrong.
01:03:32My brother is not a criminal.
01:03:34He's a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack.
01:03:38Without him, this whole country would have been bombed to ash.
01:03:41And that's why his choice to crime is stealing his identity.
01:03:45General Lysander Armstrong only fell into a coma because of the fight with the terrorist.
01:03:49And we've received no word that he's woken up yet, so this must be an imposter.
01:03:54I can tell that this whole dilemma with my identity is causing you a lot of trouble.
01:03:58But I promise I'll get it resolved and we can focus on taking down your scumbag ex.
01:04:04If you want to arrest me, fine.
01:04:07But don't fuck with my fiancé.
01:04:09You don't get to decide, punk.
01:04:10Let's go!
01:04:34Get him!
01:04:35If you can.
01:04:36If you want to arrest me, I'm going to arrest me.
01:05:27Is that enough pain?
01:05:28Or do you want more?
01:05:37Legend is written all over you, Lysander.
01:05:42Grandma.
01:05:44Meet my new fiancé.
01:05:48Wow, your new fiancé.
01:05:50He's so manly.
01:05:52Much better than your last one.
01:05:54I always knew you'd find someone better.
01:05:57It's Butch's loss.
01:05:59Trixie has always been so much better than Marissa.
01:06:02She's like a shining star in the sky and Marissa's like a roach in the sewers.
01:06:07Bitch, we name-calling now?
01:06:09I'll drown you out with insults from my side, right, Sam?
01:06:12Drown out the poor!
01:06:13Drown out the poor!
01:06:15Drown out the poor!
01:06:16Drown out the poor!
01:06:18Drown out the poor!
01:06:19Drown out the poor!
01:06:21See, Trixie?
01:06:22You've got no connections, no power.
01:06:24You can't compete against me, even if you have one guy on your side who can fight.
01:06:28We're too honorable to fight dirty like you.
01:06:30So you're using defenseless lives as your shield because you know we won't hurt them.
01:06:35Let them eat, Kate!
01:06:46You can't shoot all of them.
01:06:48Grab what you can, fam.
01:06:49Attack!
01:07:07You will not hurt a single soul in my presence.
01:07:15What the fuck was that?
01:07:17I don't care what the fuck it was.
01:07:19I'm not letting her make a fool of me at my own wedding.
01:07:28Damn it!
01:07:32You forgot I had a gun, too.
01:07:35That'll teach you for messing with the Wighams.
01:07:37Take Miss Trixie and her family and get out of here.
01:07:39We're cornered.
01:07:40I'll sacrifice myself to fend them off.
01:07:42Devon, you and your brother are both good men.
01:07:45I will not let your injury be in vain.
01:07:48They will be punished.
01:07:52Now hold still for me.
01:07:57Wright rewrites the world.
01:08:08Holy fuck!
01:08:10Did she just reverse the bullet?
01:08:11By chanting the goddess healer's chant?
01:08:13She the goddess healer?
01:08:19I'm all better now.
01:08:20Thank you, Miss Trixie.
01:08:22See, I knew that you were no ordinary woman.
01:08:25No.
01:08:26Please.
01:08:27I am just an ordinary girl.
01:08:29Don't put me on some sort of pedestal.
01:08:30Sure.
01:08:32You hear that?
01:08:33She's just some average homeless girl on the streets.
01:08:36She was probably holding out a super magnet that drew out the bullet.
01:08:38While I do not care for glory, I do believe in justice.
01:08:43Marissa and Butch, not only have you betrayed me, but now you've hurt the innocent too.
01:08:48I will make you both pay for your crimes.
01:08:50And who are you to judge me for what I do?
01:08:53God?
01:08:55Wrong.
01:08:56But you're close.
01:08:58Oh, bullshit.
01:08:59I'm going to show you how the elite can trail board your little lives.
01:09:04You want to cross the line so bad?
01:09:06Then let's see you try.
01:09:07Charge!
01:09:08Charge!
01:09:17The hell is this?
01:09:19This is the line between life and death.
01:09:23Yo, was that extra neon spray paint?
01:09:26I'll admit it looks pretty good, but I'll die before I believe that's magic.
01:09:31You're not the Grim Reaper.
01:09:33What if it's a trap?
01:09:34That woman has many tricks up her sleeves.
01:09:36We ain't afraid of her.
01:09:37She's nothing but a circus prostitute.
01:09:40Why don't you cross the line and see for yourself?
01:09:43I will.
01:09:47Left leaves the wrong rest.
01:09:56I'm fine.
01:09:57Nothing happened.
01:09:58You'll see soon enough.
01:10:00Oh, please.
01:10:01I really want to die.
01:10:03And you call this the line between life and death?
01:10:05I knew you were just making that shit up.
01:10:07Whoops.
01:10:09Just crossed it again.
01:10:10Whoops.
01:10:11And again.
01:10:12Nothing's happening.
01:10:13I knew you were just making that shit up.
01:10:19Swap!
01:10:20Swap!
01:10:21Swap!
01:10:24No!
01:10:25No, Pop!
01:10:26Hey.
01:10:27What did you do to my brother?
01:10:29I didn't do anything.
01:10:31Your brother just didn't want to heed my warning.
01:10:34I suggest you take him to the U.R.
01:10:36if you don't want your wedding to become his funeral.
01:10:39Come on, Major.
01:10:42Are you not going to help your own brother?
01:10:43How was he able to cross the line?
01:10:45See, this must be an illusion.
01:10:50Only the pure of heart can cross the line.
01:10:53Will somebody take my brother to the hospital, please?
01:11:02You're so sore, I wouldn't marry you.
01:11:04You'd go and hurt my brother.
01:11:05Oh, please.
01:11:06You hurt us first.
01:11:08At first, I was really hurt by your betrayal.
01:11:11But I've come to realize your true colors are that of a snake and a coward.
01:11:16Marissa, thanks for taking this little life from me.
01:11:20You blame yourself for being worthless.
01:11:23You think anyone will want to marry you when you've got nothing to offer?
01:11:28When you wear odd and crazy clothes all day?
01:11:34Don't touch my wife.
01:11:38And instead, Trixie gets a handsome and protective husband.
01:11:43You can daydream all you want now, Trixie,
01:11:45but when the presidential contract arrives,
01:11:47it'll hit you like a fucking truck.
01:11:49That you're nothing but an ugly phony,
01:11:51and I'm the queen of everything.
01:11:53Oh, really?
01:11:54Then let me show you how it is I who has everything you want.
01:11:58You've got nothing on me.
01:12:03Yes.
01:12:04Tell the president to get here immediately.
01:12:10Goddess!
01:12:11Madam President, I require your assistance.
01:12:14Yes, we'll be there immediately.
01:12:19Get the VP.
01:12:20We're leaving now.
01:12:24Did she just pretend to call the first woman president of the United States?
01:12:28God, I knew you were cheap,
01:12:29but I didn't know you were crazy, too.
01:12:31I'm so glad I dumped you for Marissa.
01:12:34You're pathetic, Trixie.
01:12:36A secretary to remind everyone how I have the presidential contract coming.
01:12:39Miss Wickham is correct.
01:12:41I was on the phone with the president earlier.
01:12:43Only the most important people have Madam President's direct line.
01:12:47You hear that, everyone?
01:12:48There is no way low-life Trixie could have called the president by herself.
01:12:54She's just a desperate phony who doesn't get enough male attention,
01:12:58so she's come here to play up her importance.
01:13:00No.
01:13:01My granddaughter would never do that.
01:13:03But reversing time just to heal someone's wound,
01:13:06only the Goddess Healer can do that.
01:13:08Is Trixie really the Goddess Healer?
01:13:13Oh!
01:13:19First, your boy toy actor pretends to be the war hero General Lysander Armstrong,
01:13:23and now you, Trixie, are pretending to be the Goddess Healer
01:13:26who gave me my presidential contract?
01:13:28Is this how the working class think all the time?
01:13:31I never realized how delusional they were.
01:13:35You can only dream of what you can never have
01:13:37while we rub our riches and privilege in their faces.
01:13:41Look, I don't know what circus school you went to,
01:13:43but you trying to make me jealous, Trixie?
01:13:45It ain't working.
01:13:46You can't just fake the...
01:13:50Yeah, but Goddess Healing Power is legendary.
01:13:53It's like real magic.
01:13:55Trixie, you're an angel,
01:13:57but the Goddess Healing is beyond your imagination.
01:14:00And if we steal her identity just to punish her ex,
01:14:03won't her followers be furious and riot against you?
01:14:08No.
01:14:09Trixie, look,
01:14:11I believe you.
01:14:12You saved me.
01:14:14Whether you're a Goddess or not,
01:14:16you did that.
01:14:18No matter what happens,
01:14:19you are a Goddess to me.
01:14:21We'll riot against you now.
01:14:23Tear her apart!
01:14:24Tear her apart!
01:14:26Tear her apart!
01:14:28Tear her apart!
01:14:29Tear her apart!
01:14:31The Vice President arrives!
01:14:47Who dare cause ruckus in here?
01:14:53You're General Lysander Armstrong.
01:14:56Wait, what?
01:14:59He's actually General Lysander Armstrong?
01:15:01No, no.
01:15:02We've been through this already once, okay?
01:15:05Right, Secretary Cho?
01:15:06This actor Trixie hired
01:15:08pulled this weird stunt
01:15:10to try to bankrupt me.
01:15:12But you already confirmed with Madame President
01:15:13that I got the contract coming still, right?
01:15:16Yes.
01:15:16We all thought he was a fraud.
01:15:18What I mean is...
01:15:21You're the war hero,
01:15:22General Lysander Armstrong.
01:15:24And how dare you crash Miss Wickham's wedding?
01:15:27The moment you wake up,
01:15:29you fall under this vixen spell,
01:15:31and now you're attacking
01:15:32one of the most important allies
01:15:34to the President?
01:15:35He is the General.
01:15:37Oh, but he's in trouble now.
01:15:39Did you hear that?
01:15:41Even the Vice President knows me
01:15:42as an important ally
01:15:44to the nation's leader.
01:15:45So what if Trixie picked up
01:15:47some washed-up war hero?
01:15:48We got the VP and the President
01:15:50on our side.
01:15:52You'll always be nothing, Trixie.
01:15:55I told you.
01:15:56Now punish them,
01:15:58Vice President Langley.
01:15:59This is treason.
01:16:00Lysander Armstrong,
01:16:01you are stripped from your
01:16:02military honors and titles.
01:16:08Hurry!
01:16:09The Goddess Healer needs us.
01:16:13You can't do that,
01:16:14Mr. Vice President.
01:16:15My brother is a war hero.
01:16:17He single-handedly saved
01:16:18this country from terrorist attack.
01:16:20He was in a coma
01:16:20for two years.
01:16:22If it wasn't for Ms. Trixie,
01:16:23he would...
01:16:23Enough!
01:16:24You speak another word
01:16:25and I will bring down
01:16:26your entire family,
01:16:28not just your brother.
01:16:30Yeah.
01:16:31It's okay.
01:16:33Mr. Vice President,
01:16:34I've already given my life
01:16:35once for my country.
01:16:36I have no problem
01:16:37doing that again
01:16:38if it means protecting
01:16:39my fiancée's life.
01:16:41And let's be honest
01:16:42about one other thing,
01:16:42Mr. Vice President.
01:16:43I never gave a fuck
01:16:45about any damn titles.
01:16:49I truly saved a good man.
01:16:56I will not let you
01:16:57bring ruin to my fiancée.
01:16:59And what can you do about it?
01:17:01Oh, Mr. Vice President,
01:17:02I have a swell idea.
01:17:04My biomedical company
01:17:05invented the latest line
01:17:06of poison darts
01:17:07for the military.
01:17:09Let's try it out on them.
01:17:12Hold on, Mr. Vice President,
01:17:13there's no way
01:17:14that you're taking this seriously.
01:17:15Put innocent civilian lives
01:17:17in danger?
01:17:18Despicable!
01:17:18What's more despicable
01:17:19is that you and your
01:17:21filthy companions
01:17:22are disrespecting power.
01:17:24Ms. Wickham,
01:17:25you can use full force
01:17:27on them.
01:17:28Did you hear that, boys?
01:17:33Oh!
01:17:38Oh!
01:17:42Shoot!
01:17:43Wait, that's the President!
01:17:55What the hell?
01:17:58Hey, idiots!
01:18:05Oh my God,
01:18:07I'm so sorry,
01:18:08Madame President, that was, they were totally aiming for Trixie, the fraud in the middle.
01:18:14What is this?
01:18:15Oh, that's my new biomedical weapon, Madame, for your military.
01:18:19This is a war crime. These are innocent civilian lives you're messing with.
01:18:23You're the uncivilized buffoon.
01:18:25I can shoot whoever I want. I have the presidential contract.
01:18:28With great power comes great responsibility.
01:18:30And this is the kind of dastardly creation you've made with the contract I gave you?
01:18:35What are you doing? Reverse the poison and take it out of the present before it's too late!
01:18:39That is easy. There's no need. I'll save everyone.
01:18:57It's raining gold!
01:19:01What's happening? Trixie doesn't have that kind of money.
01:19:03It's got to be cheap glitter.
01:19:07She, she, she is?
01:19:10She is a criminal!
01:19:12Don't worry, Madame President. We will arrest her and we'll throw her in prison.
01:19:15I'd be quiet if I were you.
01:19:17Because you're the one that would be going to prison once everyone is healed up.
01:19:20What are you talking about?
01:19:22The President literally came here to give me my billion dollar contract.
01:19:34This contract?
01:19:36Yeah! Yes!
01:19:38Thank you, first gentleman.
01:19:56My contract, you bitch!
01:19:59And that's not all.
01:20:12This foul weapon will not see the light of day.
01:20:15There is only a need for a vaccine if there is a virus.
01:20:18Don't you realize?
01:20:19Or are you too much of a goody two-shoes to understand that?
01:20:23You're the real virus here, Marissa.
01:20:26Money is worth more to you than human lives.
01:20:28And that's something I cannot tolerate.
01:20:31So prepare yourself.
01:20:32Because I'm about to smite you.
01:20:35What are you going to do?
01:20:37The President is here and I just invented the best biomedical products in the world.
01:20:43You'll pardon me for that little mishap, right?
01:20:47Madam President, you've recovered now.
01:20:50So what's your final decision?
01:20:54I'll...
01:20:54She's going to give me my billion dollar...
01:21:02I'll smack her until she sees 50 stars.
01:21:08Why? Why are you attacking me, Madam President?
01:21:11You're supposed to be giving me the billion dollar contract.
01:21:14You wish, you idiot!
01:21:18I've never seen a woman so vile, so ugly on the inside, it makes me want to vomit.
01:21:23I-I-I don't understand. I was just trying to punish these imposters for posing as the goddess of healing.
01:21:31And do you know the goddess healer saved me and my son during childbirth?
01:21:36You've really seen the goddess healer herself in the flesh?
01:21:40The one and only.
01:21:44And it's...
01:21:47Her.
01:22:03Welcome, goddess.
01:22:11Uh, we, uh...
01:22:15You really are the goddess of healing, aren't you?
01:22:18How else did you think I saved you?
01:22:21Then why did you keep it a secret for so long?
01:22:25I wanted to walk the earth as a normal person.
01:22:28To help those in need.
01:22:30And make sure the man I chose loved me for me.
01:22:33No, so that means...
01:22:35The billion dollar contract, it...
01:22:37It was you who gave it to me?
01:22:39She took it away just like that.
01:22:42That was our golden ticket.
01:22:44You were once my fiancée and best friend.
01:22:47But after everything you've done, we're officially getting ties with you both.
01:22:51No, please, I swear.
01:22:52I didn't know you were an exorcist.
01:22:57It doesn't matter who she is.
01:22:59Trixie has a heart of gold.
01:23:00She's an amazing person.
01:23:02And you ruin that the moment that you betrayed her.
01:23:06She's gonna be my wife.
01:23:07Because she is the most beautiful and amazing woman on this planet.
01:23:16I love you.
01:23:30All her gold.
01:23:31All her clothes.
01:23:33All that could have been mine.
01:23:35This is all your fault.
01:23:37You seduced me!
01:23:39Don't stop me!
01:23:40You were the one that came on to me, you hymno!
01:23:44Please, Trixie, give me another chance!
01:23:48I want to be rich again!
01:23:50I'll be your slave.
01:23:51I'll kiss the ground you walk on!
01:23:53You've had your chance to apologize.
01:23:55But it's too late now.
01:23:57All I see is your greed and how much you'd hurt others just to benefit yourself.
01:24:02You two should be locked up.
01:24:03And she shall.
01:24:05For creating illegal weapons of mass destruction.
01:24:08Arrest Marissa and Butch Wickham.
01:24:11It's all your fault, Marissa.
01:24:13I never loved you.
01:24:15It's your fault!
01:24:15I was only with you for your money.
01:24:17I don't care.
01:24:18You were rich.
01:24:19I'll see myself now.
01:24:22Rest assured, goddess.
01:24:24We will not be using these biomedical weapons.
01:24:27My platform is spreading kindness just like you.
01:24:31I knew you'd uphold our shared values.
01:24:33That is why I saved you.
01:24:36With these healing hands, I will work tirelessly to change the world one good deed at a time.
01:24:41Well, let's not let this wedding go to waste.
01:24:47Let's party!
01:24:48Wait, what if we just got married?
01:24:51Right now?
01:24:52Yes.
01:24:53Well.
01:24:57Do you take each other to be your lawfully wedded partner?
01:25:01I do.
01:25:02I do.
01:25:03You may kiss the bride.
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